Episode 96: Healing From Emotional Addiction
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- Опубликовано: 4 окт 2024
- In this episode, we talk about cycles of emotional addiction and how they can create suffering in our lives. You’ll learn how emotional addiction shows up in our lives and how to break free to experience new emotional states like joy, fulfillment, and peace.
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Brilliant episode. Thank you. I really recognise myself in today's topic. When things are going well for me, I recognised that it's a shock to my system and I 'create' some negative scenario to take me back to that familiar negative self.
Thank you. This has been one of my favourite episodes by far. Perhaps b/c after over 3.5 years of somatic therapy and a strong commitment to 'doing the work' on a daily basis I am currently having a whole new awareness about the types of relationships I have attracted into my life - especially in recent years when the majority of those deep seated patterns were being explored.
And Jenna, your sharing of being in a habit of abandoning people really hit home for me b/c that is exactly what I have been doing too. Upon reflection, if I'm really being honest with myself, I realise I have been doing it for years now. And I always related it to the fact that I was unwanted in utero, & immediately removed from my mother at birth, spending the first two weeks of my life in an orphanage.
But it actually dawned on my while listening to this that as my adoptive mother's preferred weapon of control was the silent treatment. (Sadly, this even continued on into adulthood when I was pregnant at 29 when she employed it to try to get me to have a termination). It's taken me years to realise the full extent of the emotional and psychological abuse I received under her 'care'. And of course my tendency to abandon people could be caused by a combination of my prebirth trauma, birth trauma and growing up in such a cruel environment but as you say the important thing is to observe my desire to abandon & explore further with curiosity when it happens.
Thank you for sharing this. I’m sorry you experienced what you shared; in particular, I’m saddened someone so important weaponized silence against you. It’s a brutal form of control, deeply explored by the Gottmans, a pioneering relationship research couple.
Your doing the work is admirable and inspiring as it shows we can, in fact, do hard things. Jenna and Nicole are amazing in using their knowledge and gifts to guide us to greater understanding of ourselves.
Best wishes, Sharyn!
Love this!!! So true and important to your future well-being ❤!!
Thanks both for another really great episode. I loved ALL the examples, especially the kittie example! (Hoping for the safe return of your fur momma. ❤🐈⬛) I was able to take away several things from this episode but the one thing that really hit home for me is that we will grapple with these emotional additiction triggers our whole lives. Here I thought I was really struggling and failing on my journey because I thought the trigger needed to be completely removed. I understand now that it will lessen over time and have less impact on my nervous system but will always kinda be apart of me . I can't thank you enough for all the invaluable material you have provided over the past couple years, thank you!!!😘❤
WOW!!! Ladies, this episode (and the meet your emotions one) REALLY hit home for me, especially Nicole's description of her inner landscape. I realize that I am constantly in an activated fearful, anxious state. I've recently started working on myself around this issue and your presentations of the topics are easy to understand and very relatable for me. I have been watching, pausing after every couple sentences and typing the explanations and examples you give and how it pertains in my life. I'm continuing to look at your other shows and choosing the ones that speak to me loudest for more of the same. THANK YOU BOTH for using your valuable time to make these podcasts. They are way beyond helpful for me in understanding my lifelong anxiety, where it comes from, and how to begin regulating it in effective ways.
P.S. I just finished taking my own notes on this episode and discovered that the whole thing is transcribed. Thank you for providing that. It will be much faster to copy/paste the transcription then add my own thoughts than typing out your conversations from the videos. YOU BOTH ROCK!!!
So interesting... One of my favorite things to do is to listen to celebrities biographies. It's something about hearing their story. Which not one I've listened to has been without major challenges. I think between those books and watching *based on true story movies I don't feel so alone in my thoughts and feelings or maybe their stories give me hope.
I love how Jenna shares so many variations of emotional responses.
I just started listening to your podcast. I have gotten your email for some time. I’m from Baltimore and I can hear that Philly accent from Dr. Nicole. I thought it was Baltimore until I looked it up. Keep up the great work. You are definitely helping me.
Thank you so much for putting us on your path, Jeremy! Celebrating your practice and so grateful you chose to tune in. Wonderful to connect with you here in this community.
I understand completely how you feel about your cat. I always go to worst case scenarios and I stress about my cats at times, too, so this really resonated with me.
Also - I hope she comes back and everything is ok! 💕
Our animals are so sacred! She did indeed come back! She has come a few times now, not at all in her normal patterning or timing. We think she's needed to go find shelter and refuge elsewhere during the extreme heat of Arizona's summer months. Thank you so much for sharing about your own cat and for tuning in with us :) It's wonderful to connect with you here Kendra!
@@SelfHealersSoundboard I’m so glad she came back! It’s great to connect with you as well!
I love love love listening to you guys, I just wish I can speak back😂. Can we have member episodes? Bring a member on to the podcast once a month or something?
ShineDee! Thank you so much for being in this conversations with us and connecting here in this Soundboard community, too. What a fun idea to have SelfHealers Circle members on. Who knows how these conversations will expand into the future! So much love to you.
Getting soothed by others is difficult for me. Feeling sad or bad is shameful for me. I should be stronger than feeling sad or bad. Seeing other people feel sad out loud and getting comforted while when I show emotions and most people don't respond enrages me. What am I missing?
You two ROCK!!! Such great nuggets. Thank you. The way you share and articulate is very healing and understanding. Thank you than
Thank you, guys, for this great work of making the individual better in turn makes the world a better place. ♥
"I am because you are". Thank you so much SaliuAhmed for being part of these conversations and your own deep work of our individual and thus collective healing and expansion. So much love to you
Haha. Check out the length of this episode 1:11:11 ❤️
Divine!! And completely unplanned- but not by the Universe ;). Thank you for connecting with us here, Sarah!
Nicole and Jenna
I’m watching this episode on my TV right now and had to pause it to write this note. I’ve been watching your podcast since I found it about 2 weeks ago. any chance I get I have been consuming your content here as well as where I first found dr Nicole (being interviewed on Podcasts) , I resonate with your stories, your theories and your experiences so deeply. Just now, Nicole talked about her scoliosis, i truly felt compelled to share my story with you. Of course, I’ll just give you a brief summary, (I don’t want to take up all the space here ) but it’s so ironic that your stories are as relatable as this … when I was growing up, i found out that I had severe scoliosis that went undiagnosed until it was too far for much possible correction, surgery would inevitably save my lungs but the curve didn’t care about either brace I wore before operating)
I have had 4 spinal surgeries, but my point is there was definitely a direct link between the curving of my spine, twisting and rotation of my body and what was going on each phase Of My Life.
The coping skills you and Jenna teach are so applicable and incredibly powerful. These topics are mostly things I’ve been working on for a long long time and it feels that when I discovered your work I think on Mel Robbins, I connected with it completely, it just fit. I’ve signed up for the waitlist for the circle community group as I’d love that opportunity for connection. Thank you both for your generous support and guidance along this journey together🙏
your words mean more than you know, and to so many I’m sure. 😊
love & hugs,
laur 📿
Excellent!
You guys are amazing ❤
Life changing information. Thank you so much wonderful ladies ❤
You are most welcme, MsRainbow! So grateful to hear this is supportive for you. Thank you for tuning in with us :)
My emotional addiction is (or is fueled by or manifested in) my maladaptive daydreaming. I still remember the moment I started it. I was 9/10, feeling lonely and wanted some positive feelings that I could control, so I started it. There were times on my teens were I never felt anything but pain or hollowness.
But now, about 23 years into mdding, I can’t function without it. Some days I can’t even feel anything without it. And, being maladaptive, it kicks in automatically. It’s a constant battle that I lose almost every time. And fighting my own mind every moment of every day is so incredibly exhausting. I have so many other thinks that I need to fix more urgently. I know they are all connected, but I just can’t untangled it. Every time I’m working at one thing, everything else comes crushing down. Especially the MDD that gets triggered by literally everything. It feels like a losing battle. I just don’t have the energy to do this every single day for the rest of my life and all of it never being enough. I never make any lasting progress and that is so annoying and makes me so angry at myself.
Thank you. I am following along with u both and the book. Daily witnessing my reactions and trigger and observe responses. Not easy.. but after listening with work more on compassion. Would be the same about the mama cat. I will definitely go back and look at the inner child work. Will probably have to revisit the shadow self too. Thank you for the support. Used to watch all Nicole old video.. and followed podcast from the beginning... looking forward to the new book
Everyone would benefit from listening to these ladies..
Thanks 😁
Thank you SO much for this episode! So helpful. I was wondering…do you have any tips on how to deal with the geographical location triggers? 44:51 What is the most healing thing to do? Is moving hours away the best option to start fresh and heal?
22:12 when Nicole said her emotional needs aren't met and she physically emotionally shuts down and the way jenna looks at her lovingly compassionately ❤️🩹❤️🩹✨
Thank you so much for watching Salmasobhi and sharing your observation :) This is such a beautiful community of compassionate souls and we really appreciate your presence and contribution.
What episode do y'all start working out of this book? I'd bought the book and would like to follow along with the podcast.
They are working out of it right now , even told you the page numbers .
157 to 160 something I do believe. Emotional triggers in the workbook vs activators used on this video.
I should clarify - what episode do they start working on page 1 of the book? I've looked through a good chunk of the podcasts that they have listed, but can't seem to find what episode they first start working out of this book. I'd like to listen to the podcast from the beginning as I start to work through the book
Episode 70
259 likes!💙💚💛💗
Thank you. God Bless you guys.