She is absolutely right. After I went on a cruise for a week I knew that I was not that bad off and that I could start working out again once I got back on land.
My father in law's favorite cruise ship activity: watching people with drink packages get mad from being cut off after FIFTEEN DRINKS because that's the cruise ship's limit
Not on all cruise lines. Royal Caribbean doesn't have a limit but they can and will cut you off if they think you've gone too far. Carnival has the 15 drink limit.
Just recently subscribed to this channel. My late husband and I went cruising ALL THE TIME and we loved it! As scuba divers there were usually one or two ports where we could dive. We always reserved an outside cabin with a balcony so we could pu our wet scuba gear out to dry. When we were at sea my husband would open up the curtains over the sliding glass doors and lay on the bed and watched the world go by. Or sometimes he would go out on the balcony with his binoculars and look at ... I don't know what but he was happy and it relaxed him.
I went on a cruise once with some old friends who talked me into it. I hated every minute of it. It felt like I was trapped inside a shopping mall for 7 days. Kept seeing the same people everywhere I went. Got that rotavirus that makes you sick for two days solid. My cabin smelled like Raid insect spray. Truly hellish experience
Sorry you had to go through that. I’ve never heard anyone describe their cruise ship experience, even when they claimed to love it, and thought that sounds like good time.
Same here. My wife and I went on one cruise, because some good friends of ours talked us into going along with them. It wasn't a hellish experience for us. It was "blah" to us. Simply not our cup of tea. You're right about the shopping mall atmosphere. Thankfully we didn't catch any disease in that overpopulated petrie dish.
“Stingray village”, I lost it right there. I’ve heard this before and it’s still funny. Kathleen’s delivery is great, she’s like that fun aunt your mother wouldn’t let you be around without supervision when you were a kid.
I had a fun aunt. I saw her once or twice a year because she traveled a lot. Every time I saw her she had different colored hair. LOL! Mother swears she’s the reason I’ve been a bottle blonde for some forty plus years. I began questioning if it was genetic about two decades ago when our oldest daughter dyed her hair. Initially she tested being a blonde for a few years, then later kept her hair dyed deep black. In our youngest daughter’s sophomore year of college, she became a red head while I let my hair grow out naturally. I had so much grey in my hair that my husband teased me about covering the grey by going blonde again. I agreed. I told my hair dresser of forty years, who is also one of my aunts, that I didn’t have grey hair the last time I took a break from blonde. She laughed & said that grey hair is a lot like sloe gin punch. It sneak up on you. 🤣😂🤣
That’s a bang-on accurate description. 👌 🍻 That might explain why I’ve adored Kathleen M for over 20yrs now. Her style of storytelling is genuine, sarcastic and entertaining. I’d attend all my family gatherings for the holidays if she was there.
I once booked a cruise for a guy who wanted to go by himself, and ALL he wanted to do was read and watch the Olympics in his cabin. He only went to eat when the streaming was over, otherwise he got room service. He just stayed on board the whole time. He says he had a great time and would do it again
It's not as crazy as it might sound. Cruise ships actually have very cheap base prices. They make their money selling tours and stuff on board. If all you want is a hotel room for a week to escape life they are not a bad deal
Cruises are what you make of them. I don’t drink a drop, or gamble, or even meet my shipmates, but I walk, eat, enjoy the view, listen to audiobooks, repeat, repeat and enjoy myself immensely
I would do exactly as Wendy did. The big difference from staying at home is having the changing views each day....and being out of your own house and environment. Plus, it's great people-watching, too. And exploring the ship, along with activities that don't involve eating and drinking. Seems wonderful to me. But then I'm an extreme introvert who thoroughly enjoys my own company and the freedom of being on my own.
You could do that checking into a nice hotel anywhere in the world. Just want to add whatever makes you happy, to each their own. Enjoy life no matter where.
On our last cruises a cabin we passed every night on the way to our room had pineapple and octopus stickers. I thought, how cute, they must have kids, wrong!
@@lot2196you don’t have to read. You wake up in a different port every couple of days and that night you get to return “home” without packing up. Ship sails to the next destination. Sea days are for reading or movies or games or socializing or spa or swimming or napping and snacking or a lecture or wine tasting. Then you’re at a new port maybe a different country. Shore excursions to see cool sights or snorkel or shop or explore. Meet friends you begin to see all over the ship. My mom and I met the most hilarious man at our pre cruise hotel and we were fast friends with him and his wife. One night we had just sat down to dinner and he spotted us when he was in line and said hey let us join you and we were like yeah come on! So fun. Another time we sat next to a gentleman from England and dined with him a few times. That was over 15 years ago and we are still friends on Facebook. Easy hassle free travel and a built in neighborhood community with wonderful dining options. New dishes to try. Scrumptious desserts. Coffee delivered to your door each morning if you choose. Chocolate on your pillow when they turn down your bed while you’re at dinner. How else are you going to be in glacier bay in Alaska. Ship stops and rotates so you can see from all angles. If you’re lucky you see calving where a chunk of glacier falls off and makes the most powerful kaboom sound. Whales breaching. Sea otters floating by holding hands so they don’t separate. Eagles fly overhead. Sailaway from Skagway the most majestic beautiful enchanting experience. Simply glorious. 😊 Bonus. When my mother began losing her memory entering dementia I just let her do her thing, gave her some freedom, and if I lost her I went back to the room to rejoin. She knew her name so they would find her room and deliver her there and then we would go out again. They were always happy to help and encouraged it. They said she can’t get too far it’s ok. So friendly and helpful. Princess cruises I had walkies and even our room number etched into a bracelet for her but she never remembered to use them. I was so grateful for the kindness of Princess staff. 😊 Now my mother is in heaven and I have so many memories to cherish. ♥️
Once, at a party, I replied to an acquaintance who was enthusing about cruises by saying that I had no desire to ever go on a cruise by saying ""It'd be like going on holiday full of all the kind of people I'd never want to spend time with - like a floating golf club", before remembering that she'd just mentioned she had just been elected the Lady President of her local golf club.
I'll have to look her up...I just came across this and decided to watch and she is definitely funny. I'm going to look up your recommendation now... thanks
@@RH-tv9hk Let me find the episode. It's been a while since they were posted on RUclips. Normally SMM is done at The Comedy Store in Hollywood, but during the pandemic - The gang "got together" and did their clips at home.
Me and my ex did the San Diego-Cabo cruise years ago. The offers at Cabo were wine drinking or shopping. My ex busted out his Spanish (shocker to me!) and next thing you know we’re in a minivan driving thru who-knows-where to a resort which was deserted (it was off season). Then we walk around this bluff and there were all the horses. He delivered my beach horse riding dream! It was fantastic. Then we had the best delicious lunch at the resort with fantastic views. The wierdest part was seeing a caged lion in a backyard. Just the other day I saw a sticker I loved on a minivan, ‘I used to be cool’. I hear you!! 😂
This popped up on my feed and thought why not. Not only have I been on 9 cruises but also worked for a cruise line for 5 years. She is hilarious and spot on! Cruising is a love/hate toxic journey. Had some of the best times and met fabulous people and also had the 30 page invoice and the hangover stuck around for weeks after 😵💫🤣. I’ll be watching more of this fabulously funny woman!
Solution: Don't binge drink. Seriously. I don't get that. I see my in-laws do that every vacation we all get together and I for the life of me don't understand why people do that to themselves, especially when they're in their late 40's and early 50's. It's a recipe for misery.
If you’ve purchased an excursion through the cruise line- generally their “ meet times” are generally early - thus if you’re not on the dock at a certain time- you may miss the excursion. The time slot along with a “ drank too much last night” hangover don’t mix well- 😂.
Went on a cruise through the Hawaiian islands. Ate a LOT more than usual. Pointedly found the gym and spent some time on the elliptical, just about every day. I added about ½ pound, compared to my weight before the cruise, so I'm gonna call that a win. I don't drink so ... fewer opportunities for bad choices. Trying to use an elliptical, while the ship is in motion, in heavy seas ... not recommended.
I specifically lost a bunch of weight before my last cruise with the expectation that I would gain some of it back after it was over 🤣 I still ended up netting a 9lb loss so I call that a win!
Really funny!! Also the fact that she's clearly enjoying herself makes it even funnier. Sometimes you can feel the performers anxiety and that makes it harder to laugh. She's having a ball!
Just the realisation of a (very important) safety drill when deeply intoxicated has made me think again about ever going on a cruise. Comedy is 👌 when it hits this hard.
Been on a few cruises. Could not begin to tell you where my muster station was or anything within five minutes of safety drill ending. Ships confusing enough as it is.
I’ve been on one cruise and I didn’t know there was a safety drill. I was the one hammered, happily following other people around until I apparently found the right spot.
I'm an Australian and am on my first post-Covid cruise in February 2024. My cousin and I are heading across The Ditch to NZ for 12 days and I can't wait. My last cruise was in March 2020. We went to the South Pacific Islands. We only got to visit Noumea and Mystery Island as Covid was taking hold and, naturally, the SP countries were worried about letting us off the ship. Fair play to them. We had a fantastic time anyway and enjoyed lounging around by the pool while we sailed up and down the east coast of Australia for a week before heading home.
This is HILARIOUS!!! I absolutely despise the Vegas Strip, so the thought that a cruise is like that only sailing away makes for sure, know I never want to go on one!!! 🤣🤣
I hate Vegas, but I've had a lot of fun on cruises. It's a hotel that drops me off at a different city every day, with restaurants, pools, and a bunch of activities. I don't drink or gamble, but I never run out of things to do.
At least it's not a Submersable ! Everything is danger ::: getting in a car, crossing the street, even going in a store or school or bank. LIVE ur life till U can't anymore
I just came back from a smooth jazz cruise from the Caribbean and enjoyed every minute of it! What set this apart from a traditional cruise is that we had live entertainment everyday from top notch smooth jazz artists and we’re with like minded people who enjoyed this type of music. We also met many of the artists, who were so nice and approachable which made it even more enjoyable. Met a lot of wonderful people too, so it was a very enjoyable experience! I hope to go on another one in the near future! I’ve been on traditional cruises too, which were fun, but I preferred the smooth jazz cruise much better! Just my opinion…
Lined up for the safety drill, a metal door behind me swung open and sliced my heel open. I was rushed to medical quarters down below and getting stitches during the sail away party, and spent the entire cruise in a wheel chair, unable to get my heel wet in the ocean or the pool, and unable to go on any bike or other excursions. But really, it was a good excuse to sit and relax. :-)
@@ellensstory4429 Same for my wife and I... Our first and last cruise was 24yrs ago. Hard pass on vacationing that way. Made us realize just how trashy the average person is.
Yes! I hated our cruise to the Caribbean in May. I will never do another one! Floating Walmart...trashiest people ever! Disgusting food. We were delayed leaving a port, because there was a fight on the pool deck! Good times🤨🙄
This actually relates to a cruise I went on when I was in the Navy! Long story short, I was a Navy Corpsman assigned to BLT 2/4 in the South China Sea out of Okinawa. We pulled into Kaoshiung Taiwan for four days. We met a local and he set us up with rooms, food, booze, and women for four days for $400! What a time we had! The woman I paired up with took me to places out of the way of casual visitors. She was super! Seven months later I went back to visit her for two weeks and stayed with her family. Wonderful woman. Wonderful family! I regret not marrying her. Great cruise. There's lots more, but this will do!
I’ve heard it said that the only people who don’t like cruises have never been on one. I was talked into one, convinced I would hate it but I was hooked.
There are many types of cruises. I probably have one drink every 2 or 3 days. I'm one of the first people off the ship in port. I generally don't gain weight on a cruise because I am so active.
During the one cruise I ever went on, my perception of Mexican port cities was that they were full of restaurants that are found in American cities. I went a couple of blocks into town (away from the shore), and was happy to finally run into a Mexican business: an Oxxo convenience store. I went in and bought a Fresca, which I like, and it seems to be a more popular soda in Mexico than in the U.S. Plus I bought a 4-pack of toilet paper, since what Royal Caribbean put on their toilet paper rolls was single-ply sandpaper.
I took a cruise with three of my friends back in 2004. I just found the journal I wrote for it. I remember laughing hysterically during our safety drill and I wasn’t even drunk yet.
Ok, I love to cruise and she is NOT wrong! LMAO. Although, the ship medical center is better than any my husband has been to as a paramedic for patients. He had to use one, A-Fib so it wasn't something super minor, and let me tell you, not only was it top notch but it was cheaper than an ambulance ride to the ER.
Wow, her voice imitation of Lewis Black is perfect! I used to see him all the time back in the late 90s at a NYC club called Luna Lounge. Every Monday night... :)
Sounds like you went on the wrong cruise. It's like picking the wrong restaurant. Luxury cruises are really magnificent. High end food, amenities, adults only, ships with 2000 and under passengers. Oceania is luxury without the price tag. Do your own airfare.
I love the people who wear the "cruising thru life" shirts with a list of cruises they've taken as if it's some sort of accomplishment to take a vacation.
Having been on many cruises, I can only say the title says it all! And if your goal is to "feel better about yourself", make sure to go in the summer. Just leave it at that.
Good for you! Not a cruise, but my cousin got married in a destination vacation someplace tropical. Glad I did not go. My relatives on a desert isle = me drink more than I should! Sheesh!
I can appreciate the couple who decorates their door. 🤣😂
That is genius.
Yesss
I decorate mine...everyone loved it..also after that unlimited drink package it helped find your room
Watch out for the upside down pineapple. 😂
Wisconsinites are definitely scrappy and industrious. 😂
@@randysretired2020, 🥸 do you mean?
"watch out for it"🫣 or
"watch out for it" 😘🤫
“There’s no math on vacation.” Kathleen is my inner voice. 😂
honey you forgot to pack the sextant
She is absolutely right. After I went on a cruise for a week I knew that I was not that bad off and that I could start working out again once I got back on land.
Thanks for drinking wine 🍷 with me
@@laurieloughran699😂😂
I performed on 65 cruises a year for 6 straight years and she’s spot on. She’s always been hilarious. Great job
Holy crap! You practically lived on cruse ships.
@@aaronburratwood.6957 just about my friend. It want easy and I can tell you stories that would make you never get on a cruise ship.
@@aaronburratwood.6957Daily commuting was not an option 😂
@@Mutzie I loved cruising! Was forced to go, but I really had a good time. Of course we were on the elite deck😂
@@Mutzietell me !!!
My father in law's favorite cruise ship activity:
watching people with drink packages get mad from being cut off after FIFTEEN DRINKS because that's the cruise ship's limit
Not on all cruise lines. Royal Caribbean doesn't have a limit but they can and will cut you off if they think you've gone too far. Carnival has the 15 drink limit.
father in law is a pathetic excuse for a sadist.
The way I make drinks three is the max for most people. Five is guaranteed to send your butt to a hospital.
Celebrity Cruiselines,one of the most elegant experience ever. Never felt so much like royalty in my life
Top of the line
@@kellyfrancis1873Do they or don't they cut off your drinks after 15 a day?
Just recently subscribed to this channel. My late husband and I went cruising ALL THE TIME and we loved it! As scuba divers there were usually one or two ports where we could dive. We always reserved an outside cabin with a balcony so we could pu our wet scuba gear out to dry. When we were at sea my husband would open up the curtains over the sliding glass doors and lay on the bed and watched the world go by. Or sometimes he would go out on the balcony with his binoculars and look at ... I don't know what but he was happy and it relaxed him.
that's great that it made him happy. Condolences to you. Thank you for sharing.
Love to you.
Sorry for your loss 🙏🏼 Glad that you have these sweet memories 🩵
That's cool. Good times. BTW, he was probably looking for pirates😊.
What a sweet story..thanks for sharing😊
I went on a cruise once with some old friends who talked me into it. I hated every minute of it. It felt like I was trapped inside a shopping mall for 7 days. Kept seeing the same people everywhere I went. Got that rotavirus that makes you sick for two days solid. My cabin smelled like Raid insect spray. Truly hellish experience
Sorry you had to go through that. I’ve never heard anyone describe their cruise ship experience, even when they claimed to love it, and thought that sounds like good time.
You went on the wrong cruise line!😂
Same here. My wife and I went on one cruise, because some good friends of ours talked us into going along with them. It wasn't a hellish experience for us. It was "blah" to us. Simply not our cup of tea. You're right about the shopping mall atmosphere. Thankfully we didn't catch any disease in that overpopulated petrie dish.
Agreed .. I’d rather be in a real mall on land thank you very much
its a hotel tthat you cant check out of.
“Stingray village”, I lost it right there. I’ve heard this before and it’s still funny. Kathleen’s delivery is great, she’s like that fun aunt your mother wouldn’t let you be around without supervision when you were a kid.
My mom is the fun aunt. 😂😂
I had a fun aunt. I saw her once or twice a year because she traveled a lot. Every time I saw her she had different colored hair. LOL! Mother swears she’s the reason I’ve been a bottle blonde for some forty plus years. I began questioning if it was genetic about two decades ago when our oldest daughter dyed her hair. Initially she tested being a blonde for a few years, then later kept her hair dyed deep black. In our youngest daughter’s sophomore year of college, she became a red head while I let my hair grow out naturally.
I had so much grey in my hair that my husband teased me about covering the grey by going blonde again. I agreed. I told my hair dresser of forty years, who is also one of my aunts, that I didn’t have grey hair the last time I took a break from blonde. She laughed & said that grey hair is a lot like sloe gin punch. It sneak up on you. 🤣😂🤣
That’s a bang-on accurate description. 👌 🍻
That might explain why I’ve adored Kathleen M for over 20yrs now. Her style of storytelling is genuine, sarcastic and entertaining.
I’d attend all my family gatherings for the holidays if she was there.
I'm old enough that we didn't have "fun aunts"... Not too many "fun aunts" from back in the Depression era...
My aunt used to take me to Haight Ashbury in the 60s to hear “The Warlocks” (became The Grateful Dead) back in the day and take the acid tests.
Glad to see over half a million views for this incredibly talented lady. I can watch her routines over and over and laugh every time.
Same here.
maybe all the views are yours then
I actually DO watch them...and often! I could hang out with her, because she's just my type of sarcasm.
Don't miss her bird-on-elavator monolog...
I once booked a cruise for a guy who wanted to go by himself, and ALL he wanted to do was read and watch the Olympics in his cabin. He only went to eat when the streaming was over, otherwise he got room service. He just stayed on board the whole time. He says he had a great time and would do it again
It's not as crazy as it might sound. Cruise ships actually have very cheap base prices. They make their money selling tours and stuff on board. If all you want is a hotel room for a week to escape life they are not a bad deal
Sounds wonderful.
That’s the perfect cruise😂
Whaaaaaahhhh?
his floating apartment
Cruises are what you make of them. I don’t drink a drop, or gamble, or even meet my shipmates, but I walk, eat, enjoy the view, listen to audiobooks, repeat, repeat and enjoy myself immensely
can't you do that At Home!
@@henrimatisse7481i opened this comment to ask the same thing!
I would do exactly as Wendy did. The big difference from staying at home is having the changing views each day....and being out of your own house and environment. Plus, it's great people-watching, too. And exploring the ship, along with activities that don't involve eating and drinking. Seems wonderful to me. But then I'm an extreme introvert who thoroughly enjoys my own company and the freedom of being on my own.
And you give him money for nothing hope you got chicks for free
You could do that checking into a nice hotel anywhere in the world. Just want to add whatever makes you happy, to each their own. Enjoy life no matter where.
That door bedazzle idea is genius! 🤣🥳🎉🎈🎈
I've heard of people doing magnets and other types of decoration as well.
On our last cruises a cabin we passed every night on the way to our room had pineapple and octopus stickers. I thought, how cute, they must have kids, wrong!
@@susangillette7317so wrong.😆
Rumor is...its always to signal the occupants of that room are..um....swingers
Never been on a cruise, never had the desire to, and after hearing this, it just reaffirms my decision, thank you Ms. Madigan, appreciate the advice!!
Doing not much of anything isn’t for everyone. I love it. Shows every night, hang out doing nothing except reading all day. ❤❤❤
I once heard a comedian refer to a cruise as "A floating toilet of man boobs." Accurate.
I'm not paying thousands of dollars to read. I can do nothing and read on my couch at home for free.
@@lot2196you don’t have to read. You wake up in a different port every couple of days and that night you get to return “home” without packing up. Ship sails to the next destination. Sea days are for reading or movies or games or socializing or spa or swimming or napping and snacking or a lecture or wine tasting. Then you’re at a new port maybe a different country. Shore excursions to see cool sights or snorkel or shop or explore.
Meet friends you begin to see all over the ship. My mom and I met the most hilarious man at our pre cruise hotel and we were fast friends with him and his wife. One night we had just sat down to dinner and he spotted us when he was in line and said hey let us join you and we were like yeah come on! So fun. Another time we sat next to a gentleman from England and dined with him a few times. That was over 15 years ago and we are still friends on Facebook.
Easy hassle free travel and a built in neighborhood community with wonderful dining options. New dishes to try. Scrumptious desserts. Coffee delivered to your door each morning if you choose. Chocolate on your pillow when they turn down your bed while you’re at dinner.
How else are you going to be in glacier bay in Alaska. Ship stops and rotates so you can see from all angles. If you’re lucky you see calving where a chunk of glacier falls off and makes the most powerful kaboom sound. Whales breaching. Sea otters floating by holding hands so they don’t separate. Eagles fly overhead. Sailaway from Skagway the most majestic beautiful enchanting experience. Simply glorious. 😊
Bonus. When my mother began losing her memory entering dementia I just let her do her thing, gave her some freedom, and if I lost her I went back to the room to rejoin. She knew her name so they would find her room and deliver her there and then we would go out again. They were always happy to help and encouraged it. They said she can’t get too far it’s ok. So friendly and helpful. Princess cruises
I had walkies and even our room number etched into a bracelet for her but she never remembered to use them. I was so grateful for the kindness of Princess staff. 😊
Now my mother is in heaven and I have so many memories to cherish. ♥️
She’s a comedian. Not a cruise reviewer.
Kathleen Madigan is my all time favorite comedian EVER
She is funny AF and perfectly captures why I've never wanted to go on a cruise.
Wooo, brother…in spades!!💕
Once, at a party, I replied to an acquaintance who was enthusing about cruises by saying that I had no desire to ever go on a cruise by saying ""It'd be like going on holiday full of all the kind of people I'd never want to spend time with - like a floating golf club", before remembering that she'd just mentioned she had just been elected the Lady President of her local golf club.
@@davewilson4493Oops, but I feel the same about being locked up in a floating hotel.
I love cruises 😂😂
This Is Amazing Comedy!!!Thank You Kathleen Madigan!!
She just has that thing you need to be a comedian! Effortlessly hilarious & real. Love her!
I'm so proud of that gentleman from Wisconsin. We are a state of professional drinkers.
I’ll have a brandy old fashioned sweet…..
And cheese artisans 🧀
Michigan folks will question that...
Love Kathleen Madigan. She did an episode of Social Media Meltdowns about AARP, and it was AWESOME!!!!!
I'll have to look her up...I just came across this and decided to watch and she is definitely funny. I'm going to look up your recommendation now... thanks
@@kingjackupeace5844you're in for a treat! Kathleen madigan is one of the funniest people alive
AARP? Lol I remember when she started out she had a bit about she couldn't rent a car because she wasn't 25 yet - where did the time go???
I've searched but can't find it. Is that the name of it? On YT?
@@RH-tv9hk Let me find the episode. It's been a while since they were posted on RUclips. Normally SMM is done at The Comedy Store in Hollywood, but during the pandemic - The gang "got together" and did their clips at home.
Kathleen is SOOOOOO funny. Thank you for the laughs!
I love her, she's so funny. Anytime I feel like I need to laugh I pull up a RUclips video of hers.
Same here! She's one of my favorites!
Madigan’s Pubcast is fun too.
Me and my ex did the San Diego-Cabo cruise years ago. The offers at Cabo were wine drinking or shopping. My ex busted out his Spanish (shocker to me!) and next thing you know we’re in a minivan driving thru who-knows-where to a resort which was deserted (it was off season). Then we walk around this bluff and there were all the horses. He delivered my beach horse riding dream! It was fantastic. Then we had the best delicious lunch at the resort with fantastic views. The wierdest part was seeing a caged lion in a backyard. Just the other day I saw a sticker I loved on a minivan, ‘I used to be cool’. I hear you!! 😂
I live in Milwaukee and I can testify that we have more clever ways to find our rooms and our cars than anyone.
Madigan doesn't disappoint...been a fan for awhile.
Hysterical and eerily accurate.
This popped up on my feed and thought why not. Not only have I been on 9 cruises but also worked for a cruise line for 5 years. She is hilarious and spot on! Cruising is a love/hate toxic journey. Had some of the best times and met fabulous people and also had the 30 page invoice and the hangover stuck around for weeks after 😵💫🤣. I’ll be watching more of this fabulously funny woman!
Never seen or heard of Kathleen before but boy she is funny. 😂
I have never seen this woman before, but she is hysterically funny! Great, great laughs!
Kathleen Madigan is at the top of her game, one of my favorite comedians.
She is right about the cruise ship wakeup time. Getting up and being ready to do shit at 7am after binge drinking the night before is pretty awful.
Solution: Don't binge drink. Seriously. I don't get that. I see my in-laws do that every vacation we all get together and I for the life of me don't understand why people do that to themselves, especially when they're in their late 40's and early 50's. It's a recipe for misery.
No one says get drunk, and there is NO WAKEUP TIME. what the heck are you talking about?
@@patgal2359And you can take naps!
If you’ve purchased an excursion through the cruise line- generally their “ meet times” are generally early - thus if you’re not on the dock at a certain time- you may miss the excursion. The time slot along with a “ drank too much last night” hangover don’t mix well- 😂.
I have no desire to go on a cruise. Thanks, Kath!
Went on a cruise through the Hawaiian islands. Ate a LOT more than usual. Pointedly found the gym and spent some time on the elliptical, just about every day. I added about ½ pound, compared to my weight before the cruise, so I'm gonna call that a win. I don't drink so ... fewer opportunities for bad choices.
Trying to use an elliptical, while the ship is in motion, in heavy seas ... not recommended.
Proves that exercise doesn't work
I specifically lost a bunch of weight before my last cruise with the expectation that I would gain some of it back after it was over 🤣
I still ended up netting a 9lb loss so I call that a win!
An elliptical on dry ground gives me motion sickness so the thought of one on a ship 🤢🤮
Óùpóù⁰òòôùù
I tried weighing myself on the scale... with terrifying and useless results. The digital number just kept going up, then down, then up, then down. 😂
Really funny!! Also the fact that she's clearly enjoying herself makes it even funnier. Sometimes you can feel the performers anxiety and that makes it harder to laugh. She's having a ball!
I imagined her and Lewis arguing like an old married couple - both SO funny!!
@@sandraleigh4023 lol definitely
Kathleen you my friend are awesome. You nailed it on the cruise. ❤️ you . Thanks for bringing us laughter
Just the realisation of a (very important) safety drill when deeply intoxicated has made me think again about ever going on a cruise. Comedy is 👌 when it hits this hard.
Been on a few cruises. Could not begin to tell you where my muster station was or anything within five minutes of safety drill ending. Ships confusing enough as it is.
I’ve been on one cruise and I didn’t know there was a safety drill. I was the one hammered, happily following other people around until I apparently found the right spot.
Kathleen Madigan is criminally underrated.
Pretty funny so far...
Her Lewis Black impression is flawless.
She just told me why I never wanted to go on a cruise ship. Never!!
She's right. They are horrible.
Not even for a Scooby snack?
@@Merlodica I’ll take the Scooby snack elsewhere.
Love this woman! She is SO positive..🤣🤣🤣
I adore Kathleen. I'm seeing her again this September and I can't wait!
Me too!
I love her Lewis Black imitation with her finger! 😂
They are good friends in real life
I'm an Australian and am on my first post-Covid cruise in February 2024. My cousin and I are heading across The Ditch to NZ for 12 days and I can't wait.
My last cruise was in March 2020. We went to the South Pacific Islands. We only got to visit Noumea and Mystery Island as Covid was taking hold and, naturally, the SP countries were worried about letting us off the ship. Fair play to them.
We had a fantastic time anyway and enjoyed lounging around by the pool while we sailed up and down the east coast of Australia for a week before heading home.
This is HILARIOUS!!! I absolutely despise the Vegas Strip, so the thought that a cruise is like that only sailing away makes for sure, know I never want to go on one!!! 🤣🤣
I tried to leave the Bellagio only to find myself on a conveyor belt going back in!
I hate Vegas, but I've had a lot of fun on cruises. It's a hotel that drops me off at a different city every day, with restaurants, pools, and a bunch of activities. I don't drink or gamble, but I never run out of things to do.
As avid cruisers this is spot on. Talk about some good people watching!
I am just dying with laughter! I love this woman so much! Just hysterical❤
Hysterical!! I’ve been on several cruises and she is spot on!
Boating…like going to prison with the possibility of drowning 😮
Oh my God, that’s it.
Sure, if prison had turn down service and an all you can eat buffet 🤣
Can she PLEASE play Emma Stone's mom?!?! 😂😂😂😂
She IS EMMA STONES MOM!
@@reneeelias9514 Ever since Emma became a thing, I have been ACHING to see those two work together! 😂
Haha Kathleen Madigan, my favorite comedian! 🤣🤣🤣
This is so true, I'm cracking up!
I'm going on a cruise to Mexico for the first time ever in a couple of months, now I'm excited and frightened at the same time 😂😂
If your afraid why are you going?
If you’re afraid even better reason to go! I bet you’ll have more fun than you realized possible but don’t forget to decorate your door with 🎈 🎈 lol
Do EVERYTHING. Get up early and do it. I'm serious.
Done it all. Fun AF
At least it's not a Submersable !
Everything is danger ::: getting in a car, crossing the street, even going in a store or school or bank.
LIVE ur life till U can't anymore
🤣😂
I love her voice and her laugh.
This is SO funny, I can barely handle it.... I've watched this five times, I'm still dying.....
I just came back from a smooth jazz cruise from the Caribbean and enjoyed every minute of it! What set this apart from a traditional cruise is that we had live entertainment everyday from top notch smooth jazz artists and we’re with like minded people who enjoyed this type of music. We also met many of the artists, who were so nice and approachable which made it even more enjoyable. Met a lot of wonderful people too, so it was a very enjoyable experience! I hope to go on another one in the near future! I’ve been on traditional cruises too, which were fun, but I preferred the smooth jazz cruise much better! Just my opinion…
I love jazz n never heard of a jazz cruise,sounds perfect
Yes, you should go on one! I’m sure you would love the experience as much as I did!
Love you humour and your delivery Kathleen ❤
Lined up for the safety drill, a metal door behind me swung open and sliced my heel open. I was rushed to medical quarters down below and getting stitches during the sail away party, and spent the entire cruise in a wheel chair, unable to get my heel wet in the ocean or the pool, and unable to go on any bike or other excursions. But really, it was a good excuse to sit and relax. :-)
" but there's booze in the blender"....
@@chriswoods662"and soon it'll render"
@@swiftkarma4436 this frozen concoction '
Oh that’s sad 😢
That's terrible, I'm so sorry. Hope they took mercy and gave you free stuff.
Nailed it! After my last cruise two months ago, I am so done! They're becoming like floating Wal-Marts!!! 🤢
I came to that conclusion almost 20 years ago.
Go on a European cruise not as many redneck Americans on board
@@ellensstory4429 Same for my wife and I... Our first and last cruise was 24yrs ago. Hard pass on vacationing that way. Made us realize just how trashy the average person is.
Perfect description 😂
Yes! I hated our cruise to the Caribbean in May. I will never do another one! Floating Walmart...trashiest people ever! Disgusting food. We were delayed leaving a port, because there was a fight on the pool deck! Good times🤨🙄
"Now there's math involved?" 🤣😂 (this gets me every time)
She is so freaking funny. Best comedian in America!
This actually relates to a cruise I went on when I was in the Navy! Long story short, I was a Navy Corpsman assigned to BLT 2/4 in the South China Sea out of Okinawa. We pulled into Kaoshiung Taiwan for four days. We met a local and he set us up with rooms, food, booze, and women for four days for $400! What a time we had! The woman I paired up with took me to places out of the way of casual visitors. She was super! Seven months later I went back to visit her for two weeks and stayed with her family. Wonderful woman. Wonderful family! I regret not marrying her. Great cruise. There's lots more, but this will do!
Ooh I thought you were going to get a baby in the oven when you went back at 7 months. 😅
thats illegal unless the baby is “circumcised”
@@NurseSue425 Same lol.
Schwabb, Hansen, or White Beach? IYKYK. ⚓️
@@elyseb674 Hansen
The idea of the “real adventure “ in the rickety bus.😅
Kathleen Madigan is FABULOUS !!!
She’s BRILLIANT.
Omg! Hysterical!! I wondered why some of the doors were decorated! Lol!
2:00 that is brilliant to decorate your door to find your room.
Right!!
Been on 41 previous cruises with 2 more booked. This made me laugh out loud!!!
The visual of the Bellagio just sailing away just helped me understand why I do not EVER want to go on a cruise!
My thoughts exactly 💯!!!
Yes, that image said it perfectly!
I’ve heard it said that the only people who don’t like cruises have never been on one. I was talked into one, convinced I would hate it but I was hooked.
There are many types of cruises. I probably have one drink every 2 or 3 days. I'm one of the first people off the ship in port. I generally don't gain weight on a cruise because I am so active.
Decorating the door so you can find your stateroom when you’re schlitzbloggered? Genius!
During the one cruise I ever went on, my perception of Mexican port cities was that they were full of restaurants that are found in American cities. I went a couple of blocks into town (away from the shore), and was happy to finally run into a Mexican business: an Oxxo convenience store. I went in and bought a Fresca, which I like, and it seems to be a more popular soda in Mexico than in the U.S. Plus I bought a 4-pack of toilet paper, since what Royal Caribbean put on their toilet paper rolls was single-ply sandpaper.
Good call on that TP.
😂😂😂
Just can't imagine that sinario! Gross
Wow, truly fascinating story.
Your life experience is pathetic man,. Wake up up before it is too late. Remember, you are a man, a free man. It goes with dignity or not at all.
Viking River Cruises are great. Much smaller, no shops on the ships.
Loved them. The Ocean cruises can be tedious.
I loved the 5 cruises I have been on. But Kathleen is so funny the way she describes her experience. 😅
She's lovely and so funny!!!! I love her.
One of my favorite all time comediennes!! So funny ❤✌️
The funniest thing about this bit, is that she freaked Lewis Black out.
Yeah but wouldn't it be awesome to hang out with those two?!?!
@@peggywoods4327 I was thinking how I’d get on that $15 to go on that bus to nowhere for the privilege
@@peggywoods4327 I'd get on that bus just for that.
I took a cruise with three of my friends back in 2004. I just found the journal I wrote for it. I remember laughing hysterically during our safety drill and I wasn’t even drunk yet.
If someone puts the stringrays in my bathtub i will pet them. Haha😂
You can pet stingrays at some aquariums!! One of my favorite life experiences ❤
What you petted was a skate, not a stingray @@pixiethebug
Ok, I love to cruise and she is NOT wrong! LMAO. Although, the ship medical center is better than any my husband has been to as a paramedic for patients. He had to use one, A-Fib so it wasn't something super minor, and let me tell you, not only was it top notch but it was cheaper than an ambulance ride to the ER.
Cruises are a suckfest.
@@MeandMyStaffy Bully for you
ER’s in the US SUCK!
“If someone puts the stingrays in my bathtub I will pet them” 😂😂😂😂😂😂
I love Kathleen too! She is so funny and relatable!
Kathleen is the best 'clean' comic. Years ago, met her once through a comic friend when I was an aspiring comic. Super cool person too.
And when this clip ends it is a Royal Caribbean Cruise commercial 😂😂. I love sailing!
Oh yeah, they make you sign a form. The form is "we promise not to be mad if this kills us"
🤣
LOVE Kathleen!!!
That was hilarious because she is so correct!
Wow, her voice imitation of Lewis Black is perfect! I used to see him all the time back in the late 90s at a NYC club called Luna Lounge. Every Monday night... :)
This is hilarious!!!
Thanks for the advice Kathleen!! 😅😅😅
Oh my goodness! SOOOO funny and SO much truth!
Almost wet myself laughing!! I've NEVER been on a cruise just in case they turned out to be just like this!🤣Too funny!!! ...........
Hahaha! I just got back from my first cruise. I felt young and healthy for the first time in a long time :)
Yikes
Went on a cruise for a work meeting. It was NOT what I expected. It was the Walmart of the Seas.
Sounds like you went on the wrong cruise. It's like picking the wrong restaurant. Luxury cruises are really magnificent. High end food, amenities, adults only, ships with 2000 and under passengers. Oceania is luxury without the price tag. Do your own airfare.
I love the people who wear the "cruising thru life" shirts with a list of cruises they've taken as if it's some sort of accomplishment to take a vacation.
Ha ha - first prize for best comment so far. Someone will, for sure, steal it!
You’re just mad you’re not part of the group
There’s a RUclipsr called Emma who announces she’s been cruising since she was 11, as if it’s a verb and an accomplishment.
@@fluffytail6355 Definitely!
Her imitation of Lewis Black is spot on lol
OMG! Laughed til I cried! She is so freakin' funny!
Having been on many cruises, I can only say the title says it all!
And if your goal is to "feel better about yourself", make sure to go in the summer. Just leave it at that.
I go to Walmart to feel better about myself.
@@jillsipocz3582 🤣 Cheaper than going on a cruise...and just about as effective!
"That’s why this is a REAL adventure!!" 🤣🤣🤣🎯🎯🎯👏🏻👏🏻
Family tried to get me on a Disney cruise once. Biggest bullet i ever dodged.
Good for you! Not a cruise, but my cousin got married in a destination vacation someplace tropical. Glad I did not go. My relatives on a desert isle = me drink more than I should! Sheesh!
Stumbled upon. Hilarious. Brilliant. Well done. Thank you.
I love her giggle ❤
This was extremely funny. Thank you.
"They don't let you explain anything" hahaha 😂