*BONUS EPISODE * The Relationship Inventory - The R Spot
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- Опубликовано: 4 сен 2017
- BONUS EPISODE The R Spot - Season 3 - Episode 13
THE RELATIONSHIP INVENTORY
12 episodes delivered every Tuesday at 3:00pm est only at RUclips - Subscribe Today!
The R Spot episodes are where Iyanla shares messages, stories, and ideas to develop healthy relationships, and mend the ones that are broken. If you want to send Iyanla questions or share relationship issues; send correspondence below.
Fixing my entire life one video at a time, blessings beloved Mama. You are a gem, you are literally saving LIVES!!!
I sent my partner a couple videos to watch and he literally just said what you said verbatim 🥰❤️💪🏾
Yes!!!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Wow, my ex stop answering my calls out of nowhere in April. He stopped answering I and after four calls, I stopped calling. I have learned a lot from watching and this one really answered a lot of questions. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO to 99% of those questions. Glad I stopped dialing.
I am going through this now... WOW!
What an asshole. I’m glad you did, too. They don’t realize their selfishness, or don’t care. I’m not certain which is worse. They’d rather concern you than communicate with you. =Cowardice.
Sometimes, they turn up imprisoned or even dead. For those of us who have experienced that, the sudden disappearance/inconsistency is especially worrying, and anxiety-producing. At least let women in your lives know you are alive. Now, I don’t care. If you can’t be considerate, I can’t either. I don’t do unreciprocated relationships of any kind.
Besides, if you turn up dead, you’re dead. 🤷🏽♀️ Nothing I could do about it at that point anyhow.
Btw- my thumb apparently clicked your face or moniker or something while replying, bc I landed on your page.
A) You are beautiful! B) Your vid titles are warm and intriguing... I’m going to watch!
It's hard to get UNCONDITIONAL Love....many people can not give that due to their own Brokenness.
Preach
The few times I dated the men did not give anything like unconditional love. Honestly , this list is nice, but its almost too much trouble for me to look for. I'm always hurt deeply trying to look for anything on this list. I'm staying single for the forseable future. Its safer for me....
Love should not be without any conditions whatsoever. You can come as close to it by expressing pier, genuine, sincere love. But it should not be unconditional. No man in this universe has ever done anything without condition. Why should we?
There are conditions to my love.
Relationship Inventory:
Love:
Is love present?
Can I feel it?
Do me and my partner have the same definition of love?
Trust:
Can we trust each other?
Do I trust my partner?
How do we handle not being trusted?
Loyalty/Commitment:
Do I know that this person cares and is looking out for me?
Support:
Is this person my personal cheerleader? Vice versa?
Respect:
Does my partner view me as important and vice versa?
Is there mutual respect?
Honesty:
What is the truth about me?
What is the truth about my partner?
Do we tell the truth about what is going on?
Why did we come together? Was it mutual respect, loyalty, commitment, and attraction?
Are we in a relationship of equality? Do we see ourselves as whole and complete within ourselves?
Are our dreams validated by each other?
Does my partner want to support me? Vice versa?
Am I in a relationship of obligation or guilt?
Are we in a needs based relationship?
Are we in a codependent relationship? An excessive reliance of validation to feel good about self is codependent! Manipulating. Authoratative. Domineering.
Do you like the person?
Do you feel attracted and connected to this person?
Does this person have a genuine interest in me?
Do they desire to spend time with me?
Am I in this relationship with someone who is honest, trustworthy, and committed to the relationship?
Am I safe with this person?
Does this person practice good self care?
Does this person have a vision separate and apart from me???
Does this person treat me well?
Does this person make an effort to get along with my family?
Can this person compromise or handle difficult situations fairly?
Is this person an effective communicator?
Does this person bring positive energy into my life?
Do I value this relationship? Why or why not?
Does the other person demonstrate that they value this relationship???
Do you experience acceptance or do they try to change you? Are they compassionate?
Is there a connection mentally/emotionally/physically?
Is this person kind?
Thank you so much
ThNk you!! Can you do this for the relationship autopsy?! Lol
❤️ Thank you so much
So much truth in one video. Thank you. I woke up one morning and found myself without feelings, and had to run my dianostics. Oh boy, What a report! This was 2 years ago and going through a complete life overhaul. Thank you for "validating" what my gut feeling was guiding me to do.
I love you Iyanla because you have obeyed God's order for you by reminding us that we can be better. Thank you a million
Aunty Ilanya my mentor!!!! I swear u r the human version of my emotional guide! My angel! I thank god that at my very young age I have the pleasure to get ur advice that will lead me to right desicions
I AM SO HOPING GOD BLESS ME WITH FURTURE COMPANION!!! WITH ALL OF THE QUALITIES YOU HAVE SPOKE ON.... A TRUE WOMAN THAT PUT GOD!!!! FIRST
Second Opinion it all starts with you. You attract who you are. Are all the things you are looking for already?
IYANIA CAN YOU PLEASE DISCUSS NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER
Renee I came across this ruclips.net/channel/UCYotx7-zHSpnE1-CpXpHF6Q on narcissistic behavor. Watching these have helped me a lot. I am hoping Iyana puts one up too!
Check out R.C Blake's..Soul Ties!!! You will be informed..enlightened..educated and Aha moments aplenty!!
Friendships of equality relationships of equality, god fearing, integrity, respect, love, loyalty, trust, truth, honour and humility, accountability and responsibility, self awareness/care🙏🏽🙌🏽
I'm happy I watched this. My husband who I've been with 7 years just used his 19 year old and her mother so he can walk away from our marriage. As much as I blame them because I brought both her and her child in my house and they came in and helped my husband walk away. I listen to iyanla and I started thinking wait a minute my husband didn't love me didn't care for me always slept out come home laugh in my face and tell me he's a man he can do that. I couldn't speak with uncles, brothers or male cousins. I couldn't have friends I couldn't go anywhere. As much as my heart hurts and I despise him his child and his ex I just realise he really didn't love me. But what hurts more is the child I loved as my own took care of my own for 7 years helped her two faced mother take a man who left her 15 years ago, back. Well she can have him back. I will hurt for awhile but I have plans and goals that he was keeping me from. Thanks iyanla you just helped me realise something.
Valencia Alwazzan so sorry this happened to you
Good thing you found this out now instead of later. Keep your head up. God has plans for you.
Valencia Alwazzan -
Now that a year has passed, I bet you realize how lucky you were. He was a big waste of your time and his leaving was easier than kicking him out.
Act on faith... Struggle is optional...
Is I possible to be too broken to be a part of any healthy relationship? I think I am. The worst part is I'm not sure how to fix my brokenness.
"Because you only gone BRING you in a relationship. And you only gone FIND you in a relationship " 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤
I absolutely love your spirit, energy and knowledge. Each day I watch a couple of your videos and I’m learning so much about myself and steps to take for healing. I’ve had a lot of hurt and lost in my life and no matter what, I pick myself up and keep moving forward. I didn’t realize I was packing my bags heavier and heavier until I just couldn’t carry them anymore. I just want to thank you for all that you do!
You are a soulful powerful black woman not just for African Americans but for interracial couples and couples of their on race .I appreciate your video because as a black man you have given me so much advices to look at what I do and what I can do to make my relationship better. But as well as for my mate to look at her inner character who she is as a woman and to look forwarding getting rid ours toxic animosity and bickering back and forth can help both of us to move forward thank you my black sister.for I will continue to watch your videos. & I hope others guys are watching because they to can learn from your insight on relationship God bless my sister...
I tried applying these questions to my relationship with myself...Im not happy how that turned out at all!
Jaime Thomas that's a start. Where are you now?
THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH!!
Iyalna u give such great insight and inspiration on relationships I love it
Wow! This was powerful! It really made me rethink relationships and how to deal with them. Thank You
Iyanla u r just an amazing woman with a peaceful spirit. I love u 😍😘💚
true and fantastic! Thanks, angel
Iyanla- I listen to these videos over and over. You are amazing!
.... this is such a great reminder of boundaries in relationship.... Thank you Iyanla V.
How i wish i could have a one on one conversation with you. This is so helpful. Thank you Iyanla.
I needed to hear this so bad thank you!!
I love this woman...
Profound wisdom....Thank you
Wow had no idea when i clicked on this how much i needed to hear this. Thanks and blessing
Love it love it love it!
I love you Iyanla Vanzant.... Beautiful piece!
Thank you so much for another wonderful season! Peace and blessings to you always.
Thank you. Really. Looking forward to next Tuesday.
Love the series changing my life loving me more.
Love the hair👍🏾
Best of your time
Best of your time
in every moment
Heart loves
Really good advice on how to re-assess a relation. Thank you !!
This video was confirmation that I was supposed to let go of unhealthy relationships! Thank you❤
Wow I’m 2yrs late on finding these... I need to become more tech savvy.
Thank you for this, it seems like this found me at the right time regardless because I’m the last 3mo I have been doing this inventory and didn’t know I was doing it “right”. Thank you very much for sharing this information, I learned still and added to what I am doing. Blessing to you
Iya, you are such an inspiration!
Thank you Iyanla for this amazing video.. God bless you!!
Thank you
This is so helpful. Blessings
Wonderful
Merci !
great break down sister teacher!
Loved it ! 💛 Thank you Ms. Iyanla!
Wow. She's good.
Love you Iyanla I've been following you for years❤ You provide that old school
wisdom like my Grandmother used to give me, not saying you are "old"! Lol! Much love and many blessings to you and your family ❤
Great message. Update the OS! Love it.
Thanks a lot Miss Iyanla, your words always affect me positive and make me grow. God bless you 🌹
My friend I just started watching you. I wish I would of known about you long ago. But yes. I was in a relationship for about 5 years. One day she just said. I need to find myself. And we split up. I believe now. This relationships was just a season. Now I understand it with your help. Thank you
Love the new look for the show!
These r spots give me life
Beautiful woman,with a beautiful heart.Free therapy at it's finest! God bless you Iyanla.
Great answer for the QOTD!
Thank you beautiful beloved Madame Yanla...thank you for sharing your spirituality, your wonderful advices and thank you for your beautiful energy and LOVE 🙂 Que l univers vous bénisse
This woman is good!!!
I love your hair!!!
God Bless Iyanla
Great one Iyanla! Much love and appreciation!
you are simple best Iyanla
I love what is written on your tshirts... I find myself looking to see what is on them... lol
Mama Iyanla teach❤
Thank you so much Iyanla! 💙
Great You Are!
Hi Iyanla..many blessings.. I have to say first that during the years ...you have come into my life when i need someone to talk to and I'm sooo thankful for you. I ould like to ask you. How can i help my fiance's heart/ego from all the hurt, pain & disappointments in his life since the day he's been born. His birth parents didn't stay together, girls he dated as a teen has cheated on him, his mom & stepdad cheating on each other, even his sister has cheated on her boyfriends and husband over the years. Basically Iyanla its like this he's mostly seen. And because of those things...he's been carrying all this luggage & fears that i'm gonna cheat on him too and we've been together for years. I'm a good lady...coming from a family who's parents are still married for 47yrs now & still going strong😌 And i believe in marriage & working/talking about problems. How can i HELP HIM HEAL & FINALLY KNOW HE CAN TRUST ME? Thank you Iyanla & i hope i hear from you soon. God Bless 🙏
Iyanla, thank you !
Loving the hair, loving the videos, loving you and loving the shirts, which by the way, where can purchase these t shirts?
This hit me hard 😔
Great relationships are intentional
Iyanla, your videos are my therapy. I feel so renewed after watching. Thank you for this and please keep these videos coming, forever! Lol
Iyanla, you are great!
CTemptation H p
Keeping The Faith in All Relationship!
Looking good love your hair
Yes it's very pretty
Great video.
Thank you so much your work comes from the name of Jesus... waouw God bless U
WHO WERE THE 4 IDIOTS THAT GAVE THIS A THUMBS DOWN???? 😡😠
T L lol
carine baptiste lol.
T L now it's 7 dummies ... LOL
TT Villalobos lmao
bigjayking24 good. And u?
Just love ❤❤❤❤❤❤💋💋💋💋
my life home
heart speak body feel soul flyyyy
I love the messages on your t-shirts, how do I get these?
catch flower
Maaaaan....🎯🎯🎯
So, I was in a relationship over a year, he broke up with me two months ago, since the beginning he told me he wasn't looking for a serious relationship, I told him then you need to find some one else, what he did? He stay, introduce me the whole family like her girlfriend an do all those things to make me fall in love with him, I take that like he changed his mind, we never leave together but he was at my place every single day and night. 4 months ago before he broke up with me, we had a conversation where he was talking about all his business plans, when he done i ask him what about us, he said, there is no us, you are not in my future, I love you but not in that way. 😥 he broke my heart! The question is, why I couldn't leave that day, why I decided to stay!😔 then in November he broke up, he told me he wanna be single and that we never was in a relationship 😫
He is 32 years old, I'm 40 year old, he have ADHD I'm divorced from emotional abuse.
Thank you!
life home meeeeeeeee
thank you I love this One... I sure wish you'll sponser me for your Wonder woman seminar....
I love Iyanla, please fix my life 😘😘😘😘
Yes I had to update my database.
I wanna b the nxt iyanla. I would give the most to study under her n women like her truly unduplicable
My boyfriend is great except he is always trying to change me. First it was my habits, then it was my car, now it’s my job. Ik that some of this is for better, but sometimes I feel like I’m not good enough. Or am I just not accepting constructive criticism as he would say...
I think he should ask you how you feel about those things he wants to give you the feedback on. He should care to know. Then go from there. Does he care how you feel and what you want and need for yourself.
Oh Lord! 😦
You help me to grow thank you i love you
in fan tory
god know me
Read some self help books, exercise, and put in the work, only you can fix your life.
I love you you much my Allah bless you much mama
You are a human whisperer.
I don't like those "needs based relationships "
hiyyyyyyyybababababyyyyyyyy
BINGO!!