*minor spoilers* That Nazi building that Bumblebee attacked? It was actually the family home of one Winston Churchill. Went down really well on our side of the pond.
...and they stuck NAZI FLAGS on it? Oh boy. Isn't Steven Spielberg in some way involved with this franchise? Doesn't he know about taking care with crap like this, since among other things he made an actual Holocaust movie? Or did he bail some time ago?
If you want to watch the 6th transformer movie early, just go watch the end arc for Transformers Prime Season 1. Probably will be better than the movie, be far less frustrating and people might actually enjoy it.
This is Darkest Dungeon lovecraftian horror fare right there. If they pull the trigger on this plot point, that would be actual TENSION in the storyline. I'm reserving the possibility of a "well done guys" high five for a potential future movie.
I started saying "WHAT?!" at #13. Maybe it's just a pet peeve of mine, but I get really annoyed when the beginning of a series/franchise presents something alien/supernatural/whatever as newly arrived in the "normal world" and something everyone has to deal with...but then later on, it turns out there's been some ancient conspiracy keeping the whole thing under wraps for centuries and the actual main characters were almost the last ones to know about it. (Exhibit B: Heroes.)
So not only was the Nostalgia Critic right, but the single most interesting thing about this movie was done better in a mainstream cartoon series. That's like saying the absolute coolest thing about a wedding cake is that it's EDIBLE. >_< And the wedding cake transforms into a knockoff Fidget spinner or something.
Bob, if you like that "Earth is actually Unicron" twist, watch season 1 of Transformers Prime. They did it first, and way better than the movies ever will.
Eh, I'm fine with cross-adaption plot point and design usage. ... I'm not fine with people being excited because something is fresh... And like 5 years old in the same franchise. ... And friggin' treating an end of season plot point of a tv show as a cliffhanger.
by that logic, shouldnt Shia be 'The Last Knight'? I mean, we know Markie Mark has gotten laid at least once since he had a daughter, but I'm pretty sure Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf never got any from either of the Real Dolls in his films
Shia is too busy causing a huge traffic and jazzing on the cars up front to top his paper-bag stunt at a red carpet. Can you imaging driving a car and Shia is in front of you, NAKED, and firing his semen onto your Ferrari?
guys I'm pretty sure Bob already knows about the big twist in Transformers Prime - it is weirdly his job and hobby to know weird obscure lore and trivia like that.
So...based on what Bob explained about the plot...Transformers have actually been on Earth off and on for hundreds, if not *thousands* of years...aaaaand none of them managed to track down the Allspark? The big super-important macguffin from the first movie that landed on Earth ages ago? I'm expecting too much from these writers, aren't I?
So Unicron is Earth? Wow, that sounds like a cool, unique twist on the Transformers mythology that shows an original idea from these movies... Or at least it would be if Transformers Prime hadn't done that years ago, and in all likelihood it did better than the movies. I don't know for certain because 1) The sequel that's inevitably going to follow up on this hasn't come out yet, and 2) I haven't seen any gone to see any Transformers movies since Revenge of the Fallen, so I rely on word of mouth about these things.
In retrospect, while the first few minutes of Bumblebee alone, nevermind the entire movie, was itself better than all the previous movies put together, I'm still mildly disappointed this movie didn't get a followup because 1) Unicron and 2) based on the ending that teased Unicron, the next movie would, indeed, have featured a bit more of Gemma Chan (to paraphrase Bob's Captain Marvel review)
Why would a robot even HAVE testosterone? Transformers don't undergo sexual reproduction. The closest thing was "budding", and that's been looooooong since left out of the mythos. Oh and I guess there was that thing in the IDW comics where a mad scientist transformer was creating "female" transformers and it was actually an important part of that plot that cybertronians don't actually have genders.
There is actually a theory about the 2007 Transformers movie where, during the final Mission City/Los Angeles battle, Starscream disguised himself as one of the fighter jets that shot a missile at Megatron during his scuffle with Optimus Prime. That could possibly explain Megatron calling him "his treacherous friend."
Bumblebee in WW2, Barricade being alive, Quintessa's existence, and Shia Labouf not being involved with the whole Merlin thing all give me the impression that the first movie has been virtually retconned. But then I remember that that gives Michael Bay too much credit.
Still nothing as crazy as Buster Witwicky and the Car Wash of Doom, the time Prime demands he be killed because he killed some NPCs in a video game, the time a Decepticon became a film star and the time some Micromasters became a wrestling team. These are all things that happened in the original transformers G1 comic run.
It's hilarious that Bob thinks the best part of this movie is that Unicorn is Earth considering that they stole that from a much better Transformers TV show
I only thing I considered to be part of franchise is all the shows and that animated film from the 80's which is way better than all of the live action films combine.
He did specifically say that it was the coolest part of the MOVIES. He has never once compared them to any of the cartoons outside of pointing out how much better the cartoons are.
Still holding out for an all transformers no humans movie where we get to see the whole giant robot civil war thing explored on said transformers' planet.
Chartreuse King Except Michael Bay introduces a new, human-sized race onto Cybertron and the whole thing is shot from their perspective. And it's implied that they have something to do with Sam Witwicky too, like they're his ancestors or something.
I love the idea of Unicron being Earth. Usually with a big bad like Unicron the goal is to destroy him. However since Unicron is Earth the heroes have kind of a vested interest in keeping Unicron around. So they will have to find a way of achieving a victory that doesn't screw themselves over. On a side note did you see Nostalgia Critics "Not a review"? If you did, how accurate was his video?
Oh my god it's been almost 10 years since the first live-action TF movie. Here's a challenge to Bob: we just know they're going to do another one, to build up on that Unicron reveal, so in your review for that one, borrow a page from Yahtzee Croshaw, and do it in limerick form!
If you want to watch the 6th transformer movie early, just go watch the end arc for Transformers Prime Season 1. Probably will be better than the movie, be far less frustrating and people might actually enjoy it.
I do wonder if this sudden focus on mythology for the universe is an attempt to turn the transformers into some kind of cinematic universe so they can do spin off films in it. We already know bumblebee movie is planned. Hopefully they can at least give one of these future movies to someone that isn't bay and we might get a decent movie.
Sorry, Moviebob, the cartoon Transformers: Prime did the whole "Earth is really Unicron" twist first and did it arguably a HELL of a lot better. If you want a GOOD Transformers show, go and watch that. Now THAT is a recent Transformers series worth talking about.
I saw the first one in theaters. I learned my lesson from that and haven't gone to see a single damn one since. I'll eventually watch them on Netflix or "legally obtain" them, but then I'm usually only half paying attention and on my phone. And yet I still don't miss anything of substance. Of course, I could not pay attention at all while it plays in the background and still not miss anything of substance.
I especially loved that the rational scientist was portrayed as the perpetually wrong asshole, and that a child was sexualized as one of the two sex objects of the film. Fucking yay.
Unicron within the Earth itself is a twist devise in one of the more recent cartoons. Makes sense with Dark of the Moon having a plot point stolen from a similar source.
I still kinda want to see it. I love action movies, and I kinda have a soft spot for the Transformers movies (as a fan of the cartoons and the toys themselves), and I like to keep an open mind.
Yeah, no. I've seen action movies that are far worse than the Transformers movies (such as Taken 3 and Resident Evil: The Final Chapter), and if you disagree with me, that's perfectly fine. But I like _all_ kinds of action movies and I give anything a chance.
So yeah, I just saw this movie today, and honestly, I didn't think it was all that bad really. Yeah, it's predictable and some of the dialogue made me want to roll my eyes, I still enjoyed the action parts nonetheless.
I was getting really confused at 15 because I thought this was the first of these I'd actually paid attention to all the way through. Also, the reason I was paying attention was 4DX. Transformers is stupid, 4DX is stupid, together they are wonderful.
Aside from Unicron being earth already having been done by Prime, the earth being a planet sized transformer has been covered in two other comic storylines. First was the transformers collectors club magazine stories and also in IDW GI Joes vs transforms maxi series. Though in both of those instances they were other entities all together. Not only can't they do anything interesting and new with this material but they can't do anything with interesting material they are literally ripping off whole sale from other sources.
I was lower-middle-class when I was growing up, so I had Gobots. Hell, they were the same size as Star Wars figures, so you could have them interact , and it wasn't the end of the world if you broke one.
16. (Possible Spoiler Alert) Also Hot Rod is now DIO from "JoJo's Bizarre Adventure" and he can stop time with some special bullets/grenades. He uses them only 3 times (although it's by far the most inventive idea in the film and would make things interesting, fun and easy).
wait, wait, hold on - Hotrod? Starscream's severed head? *Unicron?* THEY'RE PISSING ON THE REAL MOVIE NOW? (also didn't prime do the Earth as Unicron thing?)
Hello my treacherous friends... And thank you for joining me here to-night... I brought you all here to discuss as I must... The fate of that robot, of the Starscream...
So basically a stupid but somehow still fun mashup of the first season of "Transformers Prime" and the Generation One, Season 2 episode "A Decepticon In King Arthur's Court." Sounds like a party to me. Seriously, none of those twenty plot-points sounded anything to me like something I either wouldn't think was awesome or not get a chuckle out of in that MST3K, movie-riffer kinda way.
It's a few years too late, but I call shenanagans. We were promised a list of 20 things that actually happened, and only got 18 because 14 was made up and 15 was him telling us he made it up. Ah, well, it was amusing enough to be worth it I suppose.
Eh, I still liked this movie. Sure it's stupid, but I had some genuine fun with it. I hope this really is Bay's last Transformers movie. I want Bad Boys 3 already.
Transformers Prime episodes: One Shall Fall and One Shall Rise 1-3. It will give you the payoff you desire from the Unicron reveal. It's on Netflix so it can't be made any easier. Go watch and enjoy.
You fuckin' DID get me with that hybrid cars one -- it was absolutely believable. Which speaks volumes about my low expectations for these movies, of course. ;)
If you went into the film with no knowledge of Transformers lore or history outside of these movies, which of these plot twists sounds more intriguing - there's a secret society made up of ever single major historical figure that has somehow hid the Transformers' presence on Earth since time immemorial, or that Earth is secretly a planet-sized dormant Transformers who is basically what if Galactus and the Death Star were one in the same?
I wonder where is Cogman's body extension. next they may introduce Power Masters and Titan Masters. add a multiple changer Sixshot while they're at it.
So I never saw the last one, but I actually did enjoy watching this one. Now, does it hold up at all when thinking about it? No, oh goodness no. But it wasn't terrible. I think 2 stars is about right
Fun Fact, the whole "Earth is really asleep and is Earth" isn't original but ripped from "Transformers: Prime" which was the prequel to the currently airing Transformers series.
FYI, they ripped that "The Earth is Unicorn" off from the EXCELLENT tv show Transformers Prime. And it is excellent. It's the best Transformers show since Beast Wars. Go check it out.
They had king Arthur and Merlin in the 1984 cartoon. just want to point that out. This whole movie felt like an episode of G1. A bad episode of G1, but there were quite a few of those.
Usually the words "This contains video contains spoilers" makes me put it off right away. But this Bay's Transformers the only real spoiler for me would be if it was actually good.
My response to any new Bayformers film is to just go watch G1 again. To be fair, there was a G1 episode where they go to Arthurian England...so there's that.
"Unicron is the planet Earth and they promise they will do something with that in the next one." Just watch that storyline now on the awesome Transformers Prime.
Wow, this shit's gotten convoluted fast. 15 was a good psych out and Unicron being the core of Earth is lifted straight from Transformers Prime. Roberto Orci, is that you?
Look, I'm not even a fan of TF overall, but making Hotrod stereotypical French is just like the kind of thing I'd hate for something I like. Like making Red Skull Italian, or making M. Bison just a guy in a suit. Change for changes' sake that doesn't really do much.
I will fully admit it...you have actually made me want to go see so I can see those things for myself. I actually want to see what the dumpster fire is all about.
4:35 Megatron's been watching too many Transformers cartoons. Starscream wasn't in any way treasonous in this continuity, unless something happened in a comic book adaptation, in which case, fuck off Michael Bay and stop making the MCU's mistakes.
*minor spoilers* That Nazi building that Bumblebee attacked? It was actually the family home of one Winston Churchill. Went down really well on our side of the pond.
Remember reading about that. Sorry, mate :(
Winston Churchill: Boss Nazi
...and they stuck NAZI FLAGS on it? Oh boy. Isn't Steven Spielberg in some way involved with this franchise? Doesn't he know about taking care with crap like this, since among other things he made an actual Holocaust movie? Or did he bail some time ago?
Nope, he's still an executive producer. Has been for each of the movies.
Keith Fraser considering that he let Bay helm these movies in the first place i doubt he gives a shit about transformers beyond money
The Unicron is Earth thing was already done in Transformers Prime. AND DONE BETTER!
Lots of things were done better in Transformers Prime.
I think the only reason they went in that direction here is to again keep Earth the center of the universe.
ToylandChairman666 I thought they did it to explain why earth had so much energon
If you want to watch the 6th transformer movie early, just go watch the end arc for Transformers Prime Season 1. Probably will be better than the movie, be far less frustrating and people might actually enjoy it.
I'm genuinely surprised that Bay only just now got around to doing Unicron. I figured that Unicron would be the big bad of the second or third movie.
Will say it, if you hadn't said it was a lie, I would have believed 15
I believed it without hesitation because after the first 14 it sounded positively tame.
Me too.
DwRockett Same
I was right fucking there with you. What have these movies done to me...?
We've been conditioned to accept the cringe-worthy what the fuckery these movies are capable of.
True story, the "Earth is Unicron" is from the show Transformers: Prime
Which is leagues better than the Michael Bay movies.
But still a dumb ass twist.
All that means is that Bay has no problem stealing from other TF series. In the next movie I expect mini-cons and/or cyber planet keys.
it wasnt dumb in prime, it was a great twist in prime.
This is Darkest Dungeon lovecraftian horror fare right there. If they pull the trigger on this plot point, that would be actual TENSION in the storyline. I'm reserving the possibility of a "well done guys" high five for a potential future movie.
The Unicron reveal was actually copied from the Transformers Prime cartoon.
Only it was done better because the characters were memorable and not terrible. TFP-Starscream was genuinely creepy but still a coward.
Some of Steve Blum's finest work....and that is saying something.
And while it also has terrible designs for the Transformers, at least they are better than these of the movies.
I saw the movie two nights ago, and honestly, i almost accepted #14 at face value.
I am...from this day forward...going to use...the word "Witwiccan"...as an exclamation.
"Witwiccan, that soup is hot!"
Seriously. I think the writers are intentionally mocking the audience. & yet people still go see them in theatres.
I started saying "WHAT?!" at #13.
Maybe it's just a pet peeve of mine, but I get really annoyed when the beginning of a series/franchise presents something alien/supernatural/whatever as newly arrived in the "normal world" and something everyone has to deal with...but then later on, it turns out there's been some ancient conspiracy keeping the whole thing under wraps for centuries and the actual main characters were almost the last ones to know about it. (Exhibit B: Heroes.)
The whole Unicorn being Earth was also a plot point in The Hub's Transformers Prime as well
So not only was the Nostalgia Critic right, but the single most interesting thing about this movie was done better in a mainstream cartoon series.
That's like saying the absolute coolest thing about a wedding cake is that it's EDIBLE. >_< And the wedding cake transforms into a knockoff Fidget spinner or something.
Don't give Michael Bay ideas >_>
No, that's like saying that the coolest thing about a wedding cake is that it looks a bit like another, prettier cake.
The NC was "right" in the sense that he accurately described what had clearly been shown in the trailers as being part of the film.
Nostalgia Critic is "right" because he's a well-lubricated weathervane.
It did follow the movie almost note for note, though. Save for one or two things, all the pieces pretty much fit.
Bob, if you like that "Earth is actually Unicron" twist, watch season 1 of Transformers Prime. They did it first, and way better than the movies ever will.
I'm sure they pulled it from TFP. Similar to how Lockdown was from TF Animated. The writers better not take the credit for that.
Eh, I'm fine with cross-adaption plot point and design usage. ... I'm not fine with people being excited because something is fresh... And like 5 years old in the same franchise. ... And friggin' treating an end of season plot point of a tv show as a cliffhanger.
by that logic, shouldnt Shia be 'The Last Knight'? I mean, we know Markie Mark has gotten laid at least once since he had a daughter, but I'm pretty sure Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf never got any from either of the Real Dolls in his films
Wasn't there a creepy part in Revenge of the Fallen where his is mother high on pot talked about how she listen to her son having sex with Megan Fox?
Maybe his daughter was adopted/actually his niece/a clone/whatever? I don't think they ever mention her mother...
Shia is too busy causing a huge traffic and jazzing on the cars up front to top his paper-bag stunt at a red carpet.
Can you imaging driving a car and Shia is in front of you, NAKED, and firing his semen onto your Ferrari?
Shia surprise.
I think in movie 3 she talks about the size of his willy.
guys I'm pretty sure Bob already knows about the big twist in Transformers Prime - it is weirdly his job and hobby to know weird obscure lore and trivia like that.
So...based on what Bob explained about the plot...Transformers have actually been on Earth off and on for hundreds, if not *thousands* of years...aaaaand none of them managed to track down the Allspark? The big super-important macguffin from the first movie that landed on Earth ages ago?
I'm expecting too much from these writers, aren't I?
Gareth Scott Yep
So Unicron is Earth? Wow, that sounds like a cool, unique twist on the Transformers mythology that shows an original idea from these movies... Or at least it would be if Transformers Prime hadn't done that years ago, and in all likelihood it did better than the movies. I don't know for certain because 1) The sequel that's inevitably going to follow up on this hasn't come out yet, and 2) I haven't seen any gone to see any Transformers movies since Revenge of the Fallen, so I rely on word of mouth about these things.
You really got me there with the hybrid car thing.
In retrospect, while the first few minutes of Bumblebee alone, nevermind the entire movie, was itself better than all the previous movies put together, I'm still mildly disappointed this movie didn't get a followup because 1) Unicron and 2) based on the ending that teased Unicron, the next movie would, indeed, have featured a bit more of Gemma Chan (to paraphrase Bob's Captain Marvel review)
You're telling me that the evil version of Optimus prime is not Pessimistic prime? Come on!
"... loses his testosterone regulation valve..."
Wait.. WHAT???
(edit) Oh, OK.
Why would a robot even HAVE testosterone? Transformers don't undergo sexual reproduction. The closest thing was "budding", and that's been looooooong since left out of the mythos. Oh and I guess there was that thing in the IDW comics where a mad scientist transformer was creating "female" transformers and it was actually an important part of that plot that cybertronians don't actually have genders.
You guys just don't understand mechanics.
go read the IDW comics. Arcee is officially the first Cybertronian with a gender in that continuity.
There is actually a theory about the 2007 Transformers movie where, during the final Mission City/Los Angeles battle, Starscream disguised himself as one of the fighter jets that shot a missile at Megatron during his scuffle with Optimus Prime. That could possibly explain Megatron calling him "his treacherous friend."
This is definitely one of your funnier reviews, Bob. I laughed so hard at the profanity bit, and #15 was so believable, you really had me going.
Bumblebee in WW2, Barricade being alive, Quintessa's existence, and Shia Labouf not being involved with the whole Merlin thing all give me the impression that the first movie has been virtually retconned.
But then I remember that that gives Michael Bay too much credit.
Still nothing as crazy as Buster Witwicky and the Car Wash of Doom, the time Prime demands he be killed because he killed some NPCs in a video game, the time a Decepticon became a film star and the time some Micromasters became a wrestling team.
These are all things that happened in the original transformers G1 comic run.
It's hilarious that Bob thinks the best part of this movie is that Unicorn is Earth considering that they stole that from a much better Transformers TV show
Well, they finally used SOMETHING good from the previous incarnation, that's progress.
I only thing I considered to be part of franchise is all the shows and that animated film from the 80's which is way better than all of the live action films combine.
He did specifically say that it was the coolest part of the MOVIES. He has never once compared them to any of the cartoons outside of pointing out how much better the cartoons are.
Never a good sign when this dog-shit taco of a movie series is cribbing ideas from better Transformers series.
Still holding out for an all transformers no humans movie where we get to see the whole giant robot civil war thing explored on said transformers' planet.
Chartreuse King Except Michael Bay introduces a new, human-sized race onto Cybertron and the whole thing is shot from their perspective. And it's implied that they have something to do with Sam Witwicky too, like they're his ancestors or something.
"Ass! But..."
I don't know if that was intentional, but it's hilarious.
I seriously fell for that hybrid cars thing. I wasn't even that surprised.
lulz, I really did believe you Bob.
Same. I _would not_ be surprised if that actually happened.
As to number 15, I saw the movie multiple times and I still thought I remembered that in there for a second!
The joke about gender differentiation and hybrid cars sounds like it would have been pretty good. I too also brag about not having any student loans.
I love the idea of Unicron being Earth.
Usually with a big bad like Unicron the goal is to destroy him. However since Unicron is Earth the heroes have kind of a vested interest in keeping Unicron around. So they will have to find a way of achieving a victory that doesn't screw themselves over.
On a side note did you see Nostalgia Critics "Not a review"? If you did, how accurate was his video?
Gareth Evans they did that story in the transformers prime show but much better
Oh my god it's been almost 10 years since the first live-action TF movie.
Here's a challenge to Bob: we just know they're going to do another one, to build up on that Unicron reveal, so in your review for that one, borrow a page from Yahtzee Croshaw, and do it in limerick form!
If you want to watch the 6th transformer movie early, just go watch the end arc for Transformers Prime Season 1. Probably will be better than the movie, be far less frustrating and people might actually enjoy it.
I do wonder if this sudden focus on mythology for the universe is an attempt to turn the transformers into some kind of cinematic universe so they can do spin off films in it. We already know bumblebee movie is planned.
Hopefully they can at least give one of these future movies to someone that isn't bay and we might get a decent movie.
"At least it is not punishment." The most positive review of this movie I have seen so far.
Sorry, Moviebob, the cartoon Transformers: Prime did the whole "Earth is really Unicron" twist first and did it arguably a HELL of a lot better. If you want a GOOD Transformers show, go and watch that. Now THAT is a recent Transformers series worth talking about.
I saw the first one in theaters. I learned my lesson from that and haven't gone to see a single damn one since.
I'll eventually watch them on Netflix or "legally obtain" them, but then I'm usually only half paying attention and on my phone. And yet I still don't miss anything of substance. Of course, I could not pay attention at all while it plays in the background and still not miss anything of substance.
I want the transformers series to not end just so we can get more of your reviews of these movies :)
They stole Earth is Unicron from Prime?
No, they didn't steal it. They have the rights.
Still the idea came from that series.
masbusestestament, "stealing" isn't just a matter of legality. They stole that plot point.
Imma be completely honest. If I hadn't already seen it, this review would've made me want to definitely see it.
I especially loved that the rational scientist was portrayed as the perpetually wrong asshole, and that a child was sexualized as one of the two sex objects of the film. Fucking yay.
This is the perfect way to review these... I also enjoyed the channel awesome pre-view estimates of plot details. So funny.
Ass
Unicron within the Earth itself is a twist devise in one of the more recent cartoons. Makes sense with Dark of the Moon having a plot point stolen from a similar source.
I still kinda want to see it.
I love action movies, and I kinda have a soft spot for the Transformers movies (as a fan of the cartoons and the toys themselves), and I like to keep an open mind.
Matthew Cool That is the best polishing of a turd I've seen in a while. Well done on your optimism.
Yeah, no.
I've seen action movies that are far worse than the Transformers movies (such as Taken 3 and Resident Evil: The Final Chapter), and if you disagree with me, that's perfectly fine.
But I like _all_ kinds of action movies and I give anything a chance.
+Matthew Cool I kinda liked it.
So yeah, I just saw this movie today, and honestly, I didn't think it was all that bad really.
Yeah, it's predictable and some of the dialogue made me want to roll my eyes, I still enjoyed the action parts nonetheless.
I was getting really confused at 15 because I thought this was the first of these I'd actually paid attention to all the way through.
Also, the reason I was paying attention was 4DX. Transformers is stupid, 4DX is stupid, together they are wonderful.
Aside from Unicron being earth already having been done by Prime, the earth being a planet sized transformer has been covered in two other comic storylines. First was the transformers collectors club magazine stories and also in IDW GI Joes vs transforms maxi series. Though in both of those instances they were other entities all together. Not only can't they do anything interesting and new with this material but they can't do anything with interesting material they are literally ripping off whole sale from other sources.
"I can't think of anything to say about them anymore."
Seems like the Nostalgia Critic is so spot on with his prediction! XD
I was lower-middle-class when I was growing up, so I had Gobots. Hell, they were the same size as Star Wars figures, so you could have them interact , and it wasn't the end of the world if you broke one.
If it makes you feel better, I've only seen 4 and I was paid to watch it while working. I STILL WANT MY TIME BACK!
The Kayfabe WWE contract signing really got me. Thanks.
16. (Possible Spoiler Alert)
Also Hot Rod is now DIO from "JoJo's Bizarre Adventure" and he can stop time with some special bullets/grenades. He uses them only 3 times (although it's by far the most inventive idea in the film and would make things interesting, fun and easy).
Raoul Castro being cool with Transformers is good as hell.
Oh dear god, had to pause at the Michael Bay as SJW bit. I'm dyin' over here!
Same
This is a wonderful idea for a comedy rountine. I can't promise that I won't steal the general premise for something.
12 year old Me after seeing this review 3 years ago: There were writers for this movie!
wait, wait, hold on - Hotrod? Starscream's severed head? *Unicron?* THEY'RE PISSING ON THE REAL MOVIE NOW? (also didn't prime do the Earth as Unicron thing?)
5:07 Also this was a plot point taken from Transformers Prime. Michel Bays most interesting twist is taken from a seven year old cartoon series.
Hello my treacherous friends...
And thank you for joining me here to-night...
I brought you all here to discuss as I must...
The fate of that robot, of the Starscream...
So basically a stupid but somehow still fun mashup of the first season of "Transformers Prime" and the Generation One, Season 2 episode "A Decepticon In King Arthur's Court."
Sounds like a party to me. Seriously, none of those twenty plot-points sounded anything to me like something I either wouldn't think was awesome or not get a chuckle out of in that MST3K, movie-riffer kinda way.
The more I think about it, the Transformers meeting King Arthur and Merlin sounds like something from an episode of the old cartoon.
It's a few years too late, but I call shenanagans. We were promised a list of 20 things that actually happened, and only got 18 because 14 was made up and 15 was him telling us he made it up.
Ah, well, it was amusing enough to be worth it I suppose.
Dang, I totally believed the crosshairs one! Spoilers with the unicorn thing.... but it was done in the transformers prime cartoon anyway.
Sounds like the comedy of the summer from that description, sold me at "King Arthur and Merlin are real"
Eh, I still liked this movie. Sure it's stupid, but I had some genuine fun with it.
I hope this really is Bay's last Transformers movie. I want Bad Boys 3 already.
Despite Bob giving us 20 things that seem awful, they make this movie sound way more fun
So after Bayformers 1-4 had no plot at all (I'd say 3 had negative plot) Bayformers 5 has 22 plots going on at once Pirates of the Carribean style.
Transformers Prime episodes: One Shall Fall and One Shall Rise 1-3.
It will give you the payoff you desire from the Unicron reveal. It's on Netflix so it can't be made any easier. Go watch and enjoy.
2:46 Actually, their proper name is Cybertronian.
Earth being Unicron has been a thing in the past in other Transformers stuff.
The Witwiccans is where I screaming, "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE"
The sword mark wahlberg uses shows up once then is never seen again. What???
You fuckin' DID get me with that hybrid cars one -- it was absolutely believable. Which speaks volumes about my low expectations for these movies, of course. ;)
It's kind of funny that an ad for The Last Knight plays before this review.
If you went into the film with no knowledge of Transformers lore or history outside of these movies, which of these plot twists sounds more intriguing - there's a secret society made up of ever single major historical figure that has somehow hid the Transformers' presence on Earth since time immemorial, or that Earth is secretly a planet-sized dormant Transformers who is basically what if Galactus and the Death Star were one in the same?
I wonder where is Cogman's body extension. next they may introduce Power Masters and Titan Masters. add a multiple changer Sixshot while they're at it.
Wasn't that Unicorn thing done before already in TF Prime cartoon?
I think it had same writers as these movies.
So what's Bob thoughts on Prime?
I just saw it, and I STILL wasn't sure if you were kidding when you made up the Crosshairs "hybrid cars" joke...
So I never saw the last one, but I actually did enjoy watching this one. Now, does it hold up at all when thinking about it? No, oh goodness no. But it wasn't terrible. I think 2 stars is about right
Fun Fact, the whole "Earth is really asleep and is Earth" isn't original but ripped from "Transformers: Prime" which was the prequel to the currently airing Transformers series.
FYI, they ripped that "The Earth is Unicorn" off from the EXCELLENT tv show Transformers Prime. And it is excellent. It's the best Transformers show since Beast Wars. Go check it out.
Sounds to be as good as you can hope for from Bay and company.
Unicron being the earth was already done in TF:Prime
They had king Arthur and Merlin in the 1984 cartoon. just want to point that out. This whole movie felt like an episode of G1. A bad episode of G1, but there were quite a few of those.
Usually the words "This contains video contains spoilers" makes me put it off right away. But this Bay's Transformers the only real spoiler for me would be if it was actually good.
honestly that unicron reveal is a pretty great idea. still won't see this movie though
The whole Earth twist, did you not watched Transformers Prime?
Its working! They keep making it until you start thinking its good!
My response to any new Bayformers film is to just go watch G1 again. To be fair, there was a G1 episode where they go to Arthurian England...so there's that.
"Unicron is the planet Earth and they promise they will do something with that in the next one."
Just watch that storyline now on the awesome Transformers Prime.
Bad Dudes shirt, fuck yes! I was already planning on joining the patreon but this certainly helps finalize it!
Unicron appears? Well...I guess I'm now slightly kinda sorta interested. Maybe.
He doesn't really. It is used as a cliffhanger for the inevitable sequel.
Wow, this shit's gotten convoluted fast. 15 was a good psych out and Unicron being the core of Earth is lifted straight from Transformers Prime. Roberto Orci, is that you?
Look, I'm not even a fan of TF overall, but making Hotrod stereotypical French is just like the kind of thing I'd hate for something I like. Like making Red Skull Italian, or making M. Bison just a guy in a suit. Change for changes' sake that doesn't really do much.
Won't go see it, but enjoyed the review... Unicron is Earth? I feel let down but that actually makes kinda sense for these movies
I will fully admit it...you have actually made me want to go see so I can see those things for myself. I actually want to see what the dumpster fire is all about.
Wait, they already did that Unicron is Earth thing in the transformers tv show.
I like this format, please more of these with awful films Bob :)
imma go see this one now thanks to that Mansplaining comment, because imma enjoy it now.
thanks Bobby
So, how close was NostalgiaCritic in his forecast of what this movie will end up being?
4:35 Megatron's been watching too many Transformers cartoons. Starscream wasn't in any way treasonous in this continuity, unless something happened in a comic book adaptation, in which case, fuck off Michael Bay and stop making the MCU's mistakes.