I didn't get to trick-or-treat as a kid (thanks, Satanic panic), so arguably my favorite Halloween was 2020. Nobody was supposed to be out that night for obvious reasons, but in my apartment complex, between the red hats and the parents of young kids, we all kind of knew that wouldn't hold. So my roommate and I rigged up a light-up sign for our balcony that said, "Happy Halloween! We have CANDY! Yell Trick or Treat for a surprise!" And we left the balcony door open all evening. Whenever a kid yelled, we would jump out in bad superhero costumes, pull out a pumpkin bucket full of candy, and lower it down on a rope for the kids to help themselves. Apparently the bucket was such an unusual solution that kids spread the word, and soon we had kids from other blocks coming in looking for our sign. Our neighbors' kids came back over and over for the show. Two years later, whenever I meet a kid around here, I tell them I live in "the bucket apartment" and they know exactly what I mean. My roommate tried to throw the pumpkin bucket away. I'm keeping it forever.
Best Halloween I ever had was my last one. I was 12, we did trick-or-treat at the local university's dorms. Nothing but late teens and twenty-somethings handing out candy, and they would go nuts for an awesome costume. That was the year Terminator 2 came out. I bought a kit. It was a quarter face mask, looked like the terminator's eye, part of the nose bridge, and half the forehead. You cut it to fit your face, put some fake skin over it to blend it in, fake blood and fake scorch marks. The eye lit up with a triple A battery that was connected to a long thin cable that you put behind your ear and into a pocket. I got SOOOO much candy that year. It was all, "hey, Freddy Kreuger, pretty cool! You're a fairy princess. Nice! HOLY SHIT IT'S THE TERMINATOR! DUDE, THE EYE'S LIT UP!" Everyone in our group HATED me that night!
We sure didn't have a lot of money for Halloween when I was a kid. So my brother would dress up in whichever sports uniform he was playing in that year LOL- and I would use whatever dress I had for special occasions and be either a gypsy or a princess LOL. My little sister was a hobo. Costuming on that was real easy. Because by the time she had clothing handed down to her it all looked really bad anyway LOL 🤣
@@dwhitman3092 That's rough. I grew up in a middle class I guess family. Had friends stay for dinner at my house because wouldn't get much at home😟. It meant my friend and I had to split the pork chop or whatever. My mom had the food budget down to the penny😂😂. But think mom knew what was up and he could hog out on the tators and vegies. 😂😂😂 Glad things are better☺️. Poverty doesn't build character, it breeds anger and crime 😟. I hate that people have to endure it, especially children.
Rich kids are spoiled. Best costumes don't come off a shelf, they come from imagination. Best costume I saw this year was a little kid wearing plain overalls, a green long-sleeved shirt, and a green cap with an L stuck to it. He was Luigi from the Super Mario Brothers, and his dad was the same but red shirt and cap and an M on the cap. I guarantee that pair of costumes didn't cost 30 dollars all told and they could wear most of it all year! Hell, one girl was wearing regular street clothes and painted her face to look like a demon dog. One girl just wore rainbow colors and face paint and said she was "God's promise."
They didn't have good costumes in stores in the 70s...a plastic Mickey Mouse or something like that...best ones were made at home...could our family afford the store crap? Yes...we were middle class, but it would be till the late 80s or early 90s before the early good quality latex ones started to appear...so most kids made their own (parents made them :-D)
The thing to do is put up Christmas lights and then switch out the bulbs --- on the 3rd of July take out the green ones and put in white and blue ones. Then on December 24th put the green ones back in the lineup. Leave the lights up all year round
What a waste of electricity. We shouldn't be lighting up a neighborhood for a solid month, hell a solid week is millions of tons of carbon all told. Doing it all year? Just kill the planet and put it out of our misery.
Thank you, Lewis Black, for making life worth living! I was lucky: we had a Halloween party followed with Trick-or- Treat for U.N.I.C.E.F. a week or so before Halloween. Rant on!
Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF......In 1st grade we submitted orange milk cartons bulging with pennies, nickles and an occasional dime back to our teacher the day after. BUT, in second grade and beyond, I had figured this scam out. I happily accepted that orange carton from the teacher and sullied forth, dutifully filling said container with an assortment of coinage. And, when it came time to turn in that overflowing receptacle, I said that I had been grounded by my parents for some unspeakable act only a budding sociopathic seven year old could perform. Then, I went out and bought a couple of Hot Wheels cars with that money.
Many years ago my wife and I dressed up for Halloween. We both were went naked, but I had a frying pan tied around my waist, and she wore nothing but my fishing boots.. We went as Peter Pan and Puss and Boots.
you are so great. I love Halloween, loved as a kid, as a mom, And I live un a neighborhood where you have to be 65+. No children trick or treat here in the last stop before hospice.
This year, we’re going to our neighbor’s outdoor costume party as Buffalo Bill and Agent Starling. I’ve been dieting and working out like a madman so I can rock the kimono. Don’t sweat me, I’ll wear a banana hammock. Ya gotta love The big H.
@@ArianaCapraro .I couldn’t work up the nerve to do the full frontal open kimono thing. Will do that for hunnybunny at home. Some pearl clutching when I did my dance number, which is what I was going for. Wife went as Precious instead of Clarice, she was a big hit, funny as hell 🎃 Happy Halloween!
I remember a couple years ago in 2019 I was at Walmart on halloween night and at the stroke of midnight the song that was playing was cut off mid lyric and replaced by a christmas song. Pretty sure at least one worker heard me say "fuck that" as i left my stuff i was gonna buy and just walked out.
I do not celebrate halloween anymore. I turn off the lights, I go to bed early. And then I buy the candy when it goes on sale the days after for my self.
In the "seasonal" aisle of a local grocery store this year, giant Christmas plush are on the top shelf, looming over the dwindling Halloween candy, like vultures of Christmas Future. It's awesome! 🤣
Halloween was so magical as a kid. So much more magical than being squeezed into a minivan, and forced to go look at Christmas lights in rural neighborhoods. I also dressed up as Jason Voorhees for Halloween. I'm probably done dressing up, at least, until I have kids of my own. Let's leave Halloween for the kids to enjoy.
My wife had me run out in June to buy GODDAMN HALLMARK ORNAMENTS! I hate Hallmark! I even stopped buying their cards! Nothing like buying “frosty friends” ornaments when it’s 100 degrees out!
Rant: When my daughter was 3 I was so excited, first Halloween she could walk and kind of convey “tick or treat” - scheduled to have the night off weeks in advanced, covered extra shifts from coworkers in preparation to take my kid trick or treating… so working an overnight shift at a hotel on 10/30 - and trick or treaters start rolling in (small town) odd but it was a Saturday, dawn comes and the next shift comes in talking about how much fun they had and all the neighborhoods they hit up trick or treating- odd, but again Saturday I’ve had Halloween weekends myself… after getting off work I enquired with some local friends only to find out that this was kind of the norm and in the area basically moved Halloween to the 30th a Saturday, instead of the historical 31st a Sunday that year… this was before Social Media was widely spread and being a mom of a toddler who worked over nights, clearly I was out of the loop, I grew up in a large city and was not accustomed to having holidays randomly moved… I was so disappointed, obviously we made the best of it, and my daughter now in her teens has no recollection of the most disappointing Halloween ever, I can’t stop stressing it and all throughout her adolescence would search local media wherever we lived to make sure I was never caught off guard again - and outside of that stupid little town, it never has. The worst part was half the people I talked to about it didn’t even seem to realize that Halloween was a fixed holiday, we didn’t stick around the town during the academic years to say the least.
Yeah, I was raised by a nut who thought Halloween was satanic. I also escaped (literally) the evils of religion. Halloween is my fav holiday. Religion is child abuse!!!
Shouldn't Jehovah's Witnesses be thrilled with Halloween? It's like training for when they have to go out and do the same thing, knocking on random people's doors, except to proselytize a religion that gets doors slammed in their face before they can get the words, "can I talk to you about the Lord" out of their mouths!
My biggest memory of those costumes is that they were made of plastic, vinyl, nylon and other hot, nonbreathable "fabrics." Even if it was 38 degrees out (NY), you sweated your little butt off. And your exhaled breath collected inside the plastic mask, smothering you while also condensing on the inside of the mask and then running down your chin. The eye and mouth holes didn't alleviate this gross phenomenon. You had to periodically lift the mask to breathe O2 instead of CO2 and air the thing out...ick.
We wore those too! My sister's godmother work for the Cooper costume company. I barely remember the specific costumes, but I always remember that we had to cut holes in the nose and mouth so we could breathe and make sure that our peripheral vision was good 😄
Man, I envy the kids today. When I went as Spider-Man at 5, it was a cheap plastic smock and a VERY cheap plastic facemask that could cut your fingers if you grabbed them just right. The Spider-Man I saw this year was a full fabric mask that covered the head and velcroed in the back and a full suit, pants and shirt, with muscles sewn in. Best costume I ever had was just my regular clothes, old ones I could tear up, burn a little to look like bullet holes and drip some fake blood on, and a quarter of a mask that I cut to fit my face that made me look like a Terminator with severe damage. I got SOOOO much candy that year!
I burnt a cork, rubbed it on my face, put on my older brothers ragged clothes to look like a hobo and walked around in the 45 degree rain to trick or treat. The best!
That is exactly what my 2 brothers did, the burnt cork trick ! My sister and I made white wings and halos out of wire coat hangers and old bedsheets. We loved being angels that we created ourselves. We felt sorry for the kids who wore tacky store bought costumes.
As someone who was an actual hobo train hopper travelling vagrant I approve. I remember when I was a kid we only had enough money for a Frankenstein mask, but I found an old beat up over sized suit jacket and black pants in the garage and poured katsup on a white t-shirt and went barefoot, and bam, I was Frankenstein, I loved that Halloween, it's what you make it.
1967: mom decided I would make a good example of a mummy, why?? Ten yards of cut fabric wound around my ass, up my torso, and stretched around my neck. during a parade the strips started to unravel themselves, one by one. By time I got home a small group had gathered wondering if I could contain the myriad of dragging cloth before my underwear was the only thing left at immediate risk barely tangible. RIP mom. You meant well
Halloween is my favorite holiday and my favorite time of year. The thought of communities and schools trying to take it away from kids is heartbreaking to me. My Halloween memories as a kid were some of the most fun times i've ever had. Please don't do this to today's children. Let kids be kids. They don't get to be young for very long.
@@CanItAlready Yes, and if Halloween happened to fall on Sunday (as it does this year) the churches would make the town council move Halloween Trick or Treating to the Saturday before..................cuz Halloween is such an evil day I guess,
some have extreme concepts about incomprehensible reasons and search out external answers,but what's closer to reality can be described through the heart's memory
There are lunatics that think Halloween is “the devil’s holiday “. It’s Christian child abuse. I grew up that way. It’s evil to tell kids they can’t have Halloween. Now it’s my favorite holiday and I woke up and am an atheist.
We never had store bought costumes we made ours, that was part of the fun! Us girls once dressed my younger brother up as girl one year (we were in grade school in the 1970's), a dress, stockings, a wig with braids and tasteful makeup. And damn if he didn't win the costume contest at school! He was quite happy!
Speaking of not being able to afford costumes...in the early 1970s the city I live in hosted one of the largest populationns of s.e. Asian refugees. One Halloween while some friends and I were having a party a few Vietnamese kids knocked on the door. I grabbed the candy and answered they just stood there...I surmised that they knew kids were knocking on doors and people were giving them treats for free. They just didn't know why. I explained as good as I could the concept of the holiday and I managed to make them understand. I told them to go home , make a costume or a mask and come directly back and we will give them plenty of treats. They were back in about 30 minutes. They all had taken 8x10 squares of card board (from panties hose packages) scribbled on them with crayons and put strings through them to hold them on. We all though it was the greatest thing we had seen ! We invited them in , taught them how to Bob for apples and because we didn't get many trick or treaters filled thier bags with candy , fruit and snacks we had for our party. They didn't even have to treat or treat any other houses but , I'm sure that because they were refugees in a foreign land they were struggling to figure it out so I'm sure they kept knocking on doors trying to remember the words we taught them to say when people answered.
Couldn’t afford a costume when I was in grade 8 (1999) got beat up for it, got suspended for getting beat and not wearing a costume. Screw Halloween!!!
This year the Halloween stuff went out Labor Day weekend! Why don’t stores just have a section for EVERY holiday - instead of making winter babies age prematurely? There are Christmas STORES in some towns - as in they are open ALL YEAR AROUND…
We used to have one here. Mostly ornaments and decorations, some sewing kits and the like. Died off over a decade ago. Glad to see it go too. I hate Christmas the 4 and a half months I have to see it now. I would be the happiest person on Earth if we just decided as a society to stop putting that shit out until the day after Thanksgiving.
When I was in grade school we used to dress up for a day and walk around about a mile long loop during the school day for Halloween. One year I had my Mom strapped some Wheaties and Sugar Smacks boxes to my neck with plastic knives sticking out of them oozing fake blood from the holes (I was a Cereal Killer) ….the 80’s were a special time to be a kid!
In the mid-sixties, my older brother and I attended Catholic grade school. The only dressing up there during that time of the year was the day after Halloween, All Saints Day. Of course we didn’t miss the fun the night before trick or treating with our neighborhood friends but having to dress ourselves the next day for school as a favorite canonized superstar seemed something of a rather rude stand down and wet blanket. Being a kid, insulted by the idea he was being robbed of more gory theatrics, one November 1st my brother chose to be St, Sebastian. He nearly made his home room nun faint when he arrived a bloody mess with dozens of arrows strategically placed ripping into his arms, neck, legs and torso, hands bound to a fake pole in the ground before him. There wasn’t much Sister could say or do as it was an accurate portrayal of Sebastian’s demise and claim to fame. And my brother had done the biographical due diligence required to deliver a satisfactory report before the class about the Saint he had chosen. Life finds a way.
It's true. Fortunately our folks weren't awfully hard core religiously speaking, just garden variety Czech-Americans who saw the value in well rounded schooling, music, art, foreign language and such. Our dad, a Naval aviator, was usually down for any harmless shenanigans we came up with as long as nobody got hurt. Mom was an eye roller but had 4 boys, 5 counting my dad so what could she do?
Tbf, there are plenty of valid reasons why schools shouldn't celebrate Halloween, but financial inequality's definitely not one of them. Some kids can't afford food, do we do a state-wide ban on lunch breaks too? 🤦🤦🤦😂
I'm of the age when Halloween as a kid was great! Actually, enjoyed Halloween parties and haunted houses into my mid 20s. When I was a kid I lived in a subdivision. For the most part, kids could go around on their on, if not too young. You knew everyone in your subdivision back then. Adults really got into it for the kids. They would dress up to give out candy. I remember one couple that the woman was dressed like a witch, giving out candy, while her husband was beside her ina coffin. Ever kid knew what was coming, but we all still ran screaming when the husband jumped out of the coffin. This "trunk or treat" thing must really suck! Glad I grew up in the good ole' days of Halloween.
When I was a kid 60 yrs ago, the best treats were always the homemade baking. Popcorn balls, rice Krispy squares, fudge cubes, donuts...mmm. Store bought Halloween candies were just rocks wrapped in paper. Back in those days everyone knew everyone else and all were trusted. Well, there was that one creepy old German lady that never spoke to anyone, no kid ever went to her house for fear of ending up like Hansel & Gretel.
Back when I was a kid (before Columbus discovered America), the stores had not yet exploited Holloween with those crappy one-peice costumes and we were forced to make our own. Girls dressed as witches and ballet dancers and we boys dressed as hobos and superman. The superman costume was nothing more than my blue pants with buster brown shoes, my mom's old toilet curtain, one of my dad's old t-shirts stuffed with newspapers to create big muscles and a big "S" I colored on with my crayons. And I was proud of it because at least I wasn't dressed as a hobo! Neighbors would say, "Oh look! Here comes Superman to save the day!" And I would beam with happiness and pride door after door!
Every year at school we had to make our Halloween costume as part of our grade for Art class. There were some real good ones and a quite a few flops. The worst was a kid that came as a bean bag...with a tear. There were millions of little Styrofoam balls all over the school. The worst part was the kid had a bad case of gas. I never went as a piece of furniture again.
There are places it's worth it. Try living out in the country where going door to door would be three hours of work for 6 pieces of fun-size candy. If you're in the suburbs or the city, then, yeah, it's stupid.
This Halloween, police are searching for a man who is wearing a Lewis Black mask who is going around yelling "Fuck You. There is no treat, just a trick. Remember when we were teenagers there was always the rumor of a Shit Bomb set off at the homes of unfavored members of the community? Well, here it is." Hazmat crews are out working the locations hit by the Fecal Blast Bomber.
The greatest joy we had preparing for Halloween when I was kid was making our own costumes. Then, we went out for UNICEF, brought the money hoe to mail to the charity, and were allowed to go back out to get candy. To this day, I make my own costumes. Won a couple of office costume contests that way. Making your own costumes encourages creativity and engineering skills. Buying them is is encouraging conspicuous consumerism and wasteful spending, also stupid and lazy, IMHO.
Yeah, wear a costume once, throw it away. Maybe, at best, wear it next year or hand it down. Best costume I ever had was just a $20 kit to make my face look like a Terminator with battle damage, rest were my regular clothes and some weight lifting gloves.
Leftists are a million times worse about ruining Halloween (social distancing concerns, surgical masks over Halloween masks, rants about cultural appropriation, etc.). The new Puritans are on college campuses.
I love you man, but I do have to say this. In Ellicott City Maryland in 1968, I received an apple, in the neighborhood during trick or treat that contained a razor blade. Fortunately at that time I always quartered my apples so I found it.
Halloween is really about crossing the pre-perihelion of the Taurid Stream and commemorates the people who died from the cosmic impacts and ensuing prolonged darkness which brought about sun worshiping.
Yep... Christmas being pushed earlier and earlier each year.... and the holidays are crossovers too... halloween trees? Stores have 'em... and the candy for each holiday is already eaten up long before the fuckin' holiday arrives..
Today is June 11, 2023 hobby lobby is closed because it’s Sunday and it’s a religious holiday. They don’t put Halloween in their stores anymore because they’re Christian. However if you were ever nuts enough to stroll down the isles of your local how do you lobby this time of year? Do you know what you would find what they referred to as”Fall”. There are pumpkins and Indian. Is that still politically correct to say corn. Scarecrows scarecrows that are Mickey and Minnie gnomes, which I personally cannot stand and 100 million pumpkin spice things. We haven’t even reached the first day of summer, their fourth of July aisle is down to about 20 things at 40% off. I would be willing to bet you that fall will go on sale at 40% off and July 5 then they will start stacking the shelves for Christmas. You can look above the items that are for sale to the upper shelves and you can see Christmas. All you have to do is OK enough and you can see every Christmas trend they’re going to have this year once again it’s June 11, 2023.
I had to unicef for years no joke and also one year my private school made us do a fundraiser and I was broke so i saltily added three dimes in the multipurpose room and stole a free snack and sassed some female staff Lmaoo
I could take it or leave it. I just don't give a sh*!. And our closest neighbor was two miles away, our mailbox was five miles away. We didn't do Halloween.
I was raised by poor parents who didn’t celebrate Halloween, so I never had a costume. Today, I’m a 38 year old, grown ass family man and I would never consider writing a dumbass letter complaining about kids who can’t afford a costume 😂 That’s life, they’ll be fine 💯 Stop your crap and grow up. You always have the choice to keep the kids at home or with a relative 😂
In the third grade my mom and I simply tore a couple of sheets into strips and broke out her make up and ZAP first place mummy in my elementary school.
Why didn’t those parents donate costumes so they could all get to wear one? Or all donate money to distribute to the parents who can’t afford them so they could get to have their kids sent to school with a costume that year? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THINKING OF OTHERS AND CHARITY?!? 😪🙄🤧
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
That last rant is great- kids SHOULD trick or treat on election night. That is the scariest day all year.
It's already hard enough to vote, having to worry about getting back in time to dole out candy AND worry your candidate lost is too much stress.
I didn't get to trick-or-treat as a kid (thanks, Satanic panic), so arguably my favorite Halloween was 2020. Nobody was supposed to be out that night for obvious reasons, but in my apartment complex, between the red hats and the parents of young kids, we all kind of knew that wouldn't hold. So my roommate and I rigged up a light-up sign for our balcony that said, "Happy Halloween! We have CANDY! Yell Trick or Treat for a surprise!" And we left the balcony door open all evening. Whenever a kid yelled, we would jump out in bad superhero costumes, pull out a pumpkin bucket full of candy, and lower it down on a rope for the kids to help themselves. Apparently the bucket was such an unusual solution that kids spread the word, and soon we had kids from other blocks coming in looking for our sign. Our neighbors' kids came back over and over for the show. Two years later, whenever I meet a kid around here, I tell them I live in "the bucket apartment" and they know exactly what I mean.
My roommate tried to throw the pumpkin bucket away. I'm keeping it forever.
Best Halloween I ever had was my last one. I was 12, we did trick-or-treat at the local university's dorms. Nothing but late teens and twenty-somethings handing out candy, and they would go nuts for an awesome costume. That was the year Terminator 2 came out. I bought a kit. It was a quarter face mask, looked like the terminator's eye, part of the nose bridge, and half the forehead. You cut it to fit your face, put some fake skin over it to blend it in, fake blood and fake scorch marks. The eye lit up with a triple A battery that was connected to a long thin cable that you put behind your ear and into a pocket. I got SOOOO much candy that year. It was all, "hey, Freddy Kreuger, pretty cool! You're a fairy princess. Nice! HOLY SHIT IT'S THE TERMINATOR! DUDE, THE EYE'S LIT UP!" Everyone in our group HATED me that night!
You're only 13??
@@ncorp2668 I was 12 in 1991. When I say my last Halloween, I meant the last one I went trick-or-treating.
I love that story! 😅
My favorite costumes for a couple is the escaped convict and the warden's wife. This really opens up the opportunity for role-playing.
Its always a pleasure hearing the master ranter... only person who might rant better then me... 😜
Can't afford a costume? I'd love to use that same excuse to escape Christmas 😒
We sure didn't have a lot of money for Halloween when I was a kid. So my brother would dress up in whichever sports uniform he was playing in that year LOL- and I would use whatever dress I had for special occasions and be either a gypsy or a princess LOL. My little sister was a hobo. Costuming on that was real easy. Because by the time she had clothing handed down to her it all looked really bad anyway LOL 🤣
Hope things are going a bit better for you and yours😊
@@theboyisnotright6312 they sure are thanks for thinking of us :)!
@@dwhitman3092 That's rough. I grew up in a middle class I guess family. Had friends stay for dinner at my house because wouldn't get much at home😟. It meant my friend and I had to split the pork chop or whatever. My mom had the food budget down to the penny😂😂. But think mom knew what was up and he could hog out on the tators and vegies. 😂😂😂
Glad things are better☺️. Poverty doesn't build character, it breeds anger and crime 😟. I hate that people have to endure it, especially children.
Rich kids are spoiled. Best costumes don't come off a shelf, they come from imagination. Best costume I saw this year was a little kid wearing plain overalls, a green long-sleeved shirt, and a green cap with an L stuck to it. He was Luigi from the Super Mario Brothers, and his dad was the same but red shirt and cap and an M on the cap. I guarantee that pair of costumes didn't cost 30 dollars all told and they could wear most of it all year! Hell, one girl was wearing regular street clothes and painted her face to look like a demon dog. One girl just wore rainbow colors and face paint and said she was "God's promise."
They didn't have good costumes in stores in the 70s...a plastic Mickey Mouse or something like that...best ones were made at home...could our family afford the store crap? Yes...we were middle class, but it would be till the late 80s or early 90s before the early good quality latex ones started to appear...so most kids made their own (parents made them :-D)
I love you... helped keep me sane over the last four years
The thing to do is put up Christmas lights and then switch out the bulbs --- on the 3rd of July take out the green ones and put in white and blue ones. Then on December 24th put the green ones back in the lineup. Leave the lights up all year round
What a waste of electricity. We shouldn't be lighting up a neighborhood for a solid month, hell a solid week is millions of tons of carbon all told. Doing it all year? Just kill the planet and put it out of our misery.
💗💗 Lewis Black is the absolute greatest!
Thank you, Lewis Black, for making life worth living! I was lucky: we had a Halloween party followed with Trick-or- Treat for U.N.I.C.E.F. a week or so before Halloween. Rant on!
Absolutely agree!!
Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF......In 1st grade we submitted orange milk cartons bulging with pennies, nickles and an occasional dime back to our teacher the day after.
BUT, in second grade and beyond, I had figured this scam out. I happily accepted that orange carton from the teacher and sullied forth, dutifully filling said container with an assortment of coinage.
And, when it came time to turn in that overflowing receptacle, I said that I had been grounded by my parents for some unspeakable act only a budding sociopathic seven year old could perform.
Then, I went out and bought a couple of Hot Wheels cars with that money.
Love this man. 😎
Many years ago my wife and I dressed up for Halloween. We both were went naked, but I had a frying pan tied around my waist, and she wore nothing but my fishing boots.. We went as Peter Pan and Puss and Boots.
You got a big laugh outta me!
Good One!
😂😂😂😂
Hysterical!!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Oh, my! 😅
you are so great. I love Halloween, loved as a kid, as a mom, And I live un a neighborhood where you have to be 65+. No children trick or treat here in the last stop before hospice.
I went to Walmart yesterday and they had Christmas candy out. lol I did have to buy some Bobs candycanes lol
The rant is... AWESOME!
This year, we’re going to our neighbor’s outdoor costume party as Buffalo Bill and Agent Starling. I’ve been dieting and working out like a madman so I can rock the kimono. Don’t sweat me, I’ll wear a banana hammock. Ya gotta love The big H.
Good for you
Haha! Great idea! I can see why you’d pick buffalo bill over Hannibal 🤣 how’d the neighbors react?
@@ArianaCapraro
.I couldn’t work up the nerve to do the full frontal open kimono thing. Will do that for hunnybunny at home. Some pearl clutching when I did my dance number, which is what I was going for. Wife went as Precious instead of Clarice, she was a big hit, funny as hell 🎃 Happy Halloween!
He is brilliant 👏 😀 👌
Lewis Black for President.
*We should just cancel the Earth at this point. It had a good run.*
the mice need to hit the reset switch.
Still waiting for the dolphins to just say screw it and bail
“So long and thanks for all the fish!”
Nice raft of Hitchhiker's Guide references.
I remember a couple years ago in 2019 I was at Walmart on halloween night and at the stroke of midnight the song that was playing was cut off mid lyric and replaced by a christmas song. Pretty sure at least one worker heard me say "fuck that" as i left my stuff i was gonna buy and just walked out.
Preach! ✊🎃
love this guy
I do not celebrate halloween anymore. I turn off the lights, I go to bed early. And then I buy the candy when it goes on sale the days after for my self.
Cracker Barrel, I actually picked up a copy of Dracula and another of Frankenstein about half way through October.
In the "seasonal" aisle of a local grocery store this year, giant Christmas plush are on the top shelf, looming over the dwindling Halloween candy, like vultures of Christmas Future.
It's awesome! 🤣
Wasn't it Lewis Black that said he remembered when Halloween was its own holiday and Santa wasn't sticking his butt in?
Halloween was so magical as a kid. So much more magical than being squeezed into a minivan, and forced to go look at Christmas lights in rural neighborhoods. I also dressed up as Jason Voorhees for Halloween. I'm probably done dressing up, at least, until I have kids of my own. Let's leave Halloween for the kids to enjoy.
free energy now for our
children's, children's, children
My wife had me run out in June to buy GODDAMN HALLMARK ORNAMENTS! I hate Hallmark! I even stopped buying their cards! Nothing like buying “frosty friends” ornaments when it’s 100 degrees out!
get a candle I'll let it melt on the freaking sidewalk
4:50 AMEN
The whole thing though is gold.
Rant: When my daughter was 3 I was so excited, first Halloween she could walk and kind of convey “tick or treat” - scheduled to have the night off weeks in advanced, covered extra shifts from coworkers in preparation to take my kid trick or treating… so working an overnight shift at a hotel on 10/30 - and trick or treaters start rolling in (small town) odd but it was a Saturday, dawn comes and the next shift comes in talking about how much fun they had and all the neighborhoods they hit up trick or treating- odd, but again Saturday I’ve had Halloween weekends myself… after getting off work I enquired with some local friends only to find out that this was kind of the norm and in the area basically moved Halloween to the 30th a Saturday, instead of the historical 31st a Sunday that year… this was before Social Media was widely spread and being a mom of a toddler who worked over nights, clearly I was out of the loop, I grew up in a large city and was not accustomed to having holidays randomly moved… I was so disappointed, obviously we made the best of it, and my daughter now in her teens has no recollection of the most disappointing Halloween ever, I can’t stop stressing it and all throughout her adolescence would search local media wherever we lived to make sure I was never caught off guard again - and outside of that stupid little town, it never has. The worst part was half the people I talked to about it didn’t even seem to realize that Halloween was a fixed holiday, we didn’t stick around the town during the academic years to say the least.
The last one was the best 👌
Trick Trunkin @ Church parking lots?! That’s an oxymoron
I was forcibly raised as a JW. I escaped. I’m ok now. Holidays are just another day to me and I like it that way.
Yeah, I was raised by a nut who thought Halloween was satanic. I also escaped (literally) the evils of religion. Halloween is my fav holiday. Religion is child abuse!!!
Shouldn't Jehovah's Witnesses be thrilled with Halloween? It's like training for when they have to go out and do the same thing, knocking on random people's doors, except to proselytize a religion that gets doors slammed in their face before they can get the words, "can I talk to you about the Lord" out of their mouths!
My biggest memory of those costumes is that they were made of plastic, vinyl, nylon and other hot, nonbreathable "fabrics." Even if it was 38 degrees out (NY), you sweated your little butt off. And your exhaled breath collected inside the plastic mask, smothering you while also condensing on the inside of the mask and then running down your chin. The eye and mouth holes didn't alleviate this gross phenomenon. You had to periodically lift the mask to breathe O2 instead of CO2 and air the thing out...ick.
Oh yeah, Happy Halloween, Lewis! Have fun and stay safe.
We wore those too! My sister's godmother work for the Cooper costume company. I barely remember the specific costumes, but I always remember that we had to cut holes in the nose and mouth so we could breathe and make sure that our peripheral vision was good 😄
Man, I envy the kids today. When I went as Spider-Man at 5, it was a cheap plastic smock and a VERY cheap plastic facemask that could cut your fingers if you grabbed them just right. The Spider-Man I saw this year was a full fabric mask that covered the head and velcroed in the back and a full suit, pants and shirt, with muscles sewn in. Best costume I ever had was just my regular clothes, old ones I could tear up, burn a little to look like bullet holes and drip some fake blood on, and a quarter of a mask that I cut to fit my face that made me look like a Terminator with severe damage. I got SOOOO much candy that year!
Remember when it used to be cold on Halloween?
I burnt a cork, rubbed it on my face, put on my older brothers ragged clothes to look like a hobo and walked around in the 45 degree rain to trick or treat. The best!
That is exactly what my 2 brothers did, the burnt cork trick ! My sister and I made white wings and halos out of wire coat hangers and old bedsheets. We loved being angels that we created ourselves. We felt sorry for the kids who wore tacky store bought costumes.
As someone who was an actual hobo train hopper travelling vagrant I approve.
I remember when I was a kid we only had enough money for a Frankenstein mask, but I found an old beat up over sized suit jacket and black pants in the garage and poured katsup on a white t-shirt and went barefoot, and bam, I was Frankenstein, I loved that Halloween, it's what you make it.
We always went as pirates cause mom put them together from rags.
I liked to go as Eddie the Grimm maiden Reaper
I love this.
1967: mom decided I would make a good example of a mummy, why?? Ten yards of cut fabric wound around my ass, up my torso, and stretched around my neck. during a parade the strips started to unravel themselves, one by one. By time I got home a small group had gathered wondering if I could contain the myriad of dragging cloth before my underwear was the only thing left at immediate risk barely tangible.
RIP mom. You meant well
very good story
Thx.🎃
Thats awesome!!
Happy Halloween Mr. Black
Halloween is my favorite holiday and my favorite time of year. The thought of communities and schools trying to take it away from kids is heartbreaking to me. My Halloween memories as a kid were some of the most fun times i've ever had. Please don't do this to today's children. Let kids be kids. They don't get to be young for very long.
There are places in the Bible belt where churches have Hell house attractions to teach kids all about the consequences of sin.
Happy Halloween, eh?
@@CanItAlready Yes, and if Halloween happened to fall on Sunday (as it does this year) the churches would make the town council move Halloween Trick or Treating to the Saturday before..................cuz Halloween is such an evil day I guess,
some have extreme concepts about incomprehensible reasons and search out external answers,but what's closer to reality can be described through the heart's memory
also my favorite holiday by a landslide
There are lunatics that think Halloween is “the devil’s holiday “. It’s Christian child abuse. I grew up that way. It’s evil to tell kids they can’t have Halloween. Now it’s my favorite holiday and I woke up and am an atheist.
Wonderful video. Hobby Lobby puts their Christmas out in JUNE !!!
I remember Halloween I remember wearing the same costume four yrs in a row
We never had store bought costumes we made ours, that was part of the fun!
Us girls once dressed my younger brother up as girl one year (we were in grade school in the 1970's), a dress, stockings, a wig with braids and tasteful makeup. And damn if he didn't win the costume contest at school! He was quite happy!
That last one was on point
I also collected for Unisef
I was the dweeb that LIKED collecting for UNICEF!
Good for you, it's a good cause and they need the fonds!👍
Speaking of not being able to afford costumes...in the early 1970s the city I live in hosted one of the largest populationns of s.e. Asian refugees. One Halloween while some friends and I were having a party a few Vietnamese kids knocked on the door. I grabbed the candy and answered they just stood there...I surmised that they knew kids were knocking on doors and people were giving them treats for free. They just didn't know why. I explained as good as I could the concept of the holiday and I managed to make them understand. I told them to go home , make a costume or a mask and come directly back and we will give them plenty of treats. They were back in about 30 minutes. They all had taken 8x10 squares of card board (from panties hose packages) scribbled on them with crayons and put strings through them to hold them on. We all though it was the greatest thing we had seen ! We invited them in , taught them how to Bob for apples and because we didn't get many trick or treaters filled thier bags with candy , fruit and snacks we had for our party. They didn't even have to treat or treat any other houses but , I'm sure that because they were refugees in a foreign land they were struggling to figure it out so I'm sure they kept knocking on doors trying to remember the words we taught them to say when people answered.
Couldn’t afford a costume when I was in grade 8 (1999) got beat up for it, got suspended for getting beat and not wearing a costume. Screw Halloween!!!
This year the Halloween stuff went out Labor Day weekend! Why don’t stores just have a section for EVERY holiday - instead of making winter babies age prematurely? There are Christmas STORES in some towns - as in they are open ALL YEAR AROUND…
We used to have one here. Mostly ornaments and decorations, some sewing kits and the like. Died off over a decade ago. Glad to see it go too. I hate Christmas the 4 and a half months I have to see it now. I would be the happiest person on Earth if we just decided as a society to stop putting that shit out until the day after Thanksgiving.
i know it was visceral and surreally anal
Great Video! Thanks
You're never to old to go door to door getting candy from strangers
I never got to do school Halloween or anyother holiday I always got sick and had to stay home later in life my daughter was the same way 🙃 😭
When I was in grade school we used to dress up for a day and walk around about a mile long loop during the school day for Halloween. One year I had my Mom strapped some Wheaties and Sugar Smacks boxes to my neck with plastic knives sticking out of them oozing fake blood from the holes (I was a Cereal Killer) ….the 80’s were a special time to be a kid!
In the mid-sixties, my older brother and I attended Catholic grade school. The only dressing up there during that time of the year was the day after Halloween, All Saints Day. Of course we didn’t miss the fun the night before trick or treating with our neighborhood friends but having to dress ourselves the next day for school as a favorite canonized superstar seemed something of a rather rude stand down and wet blanket. Being a kid, insulted by the idea he was being robbed of more gory theatrics, one November 1st my brother chose to be St, Sebastian. He nearly made his home room nun faint when he arrived a bloody mess with dozens of arrows strategically placed ripping into his arms, neck, legs and torso, hands bound to a fake pole in the ground before him. There wasn’t much Sister could say or do as it was an accurate portrayal of Sebastian’s demise and claim to fame. And my brother had done the biographical due diligence required to deliver a satisfactory report before the class about the Saint he had chosen. Life finds a way.
Damn, that is metal as fuck.
you can't stop kids from getting into a public holiday in catholic school they simply cannot be stopped
It's true. Fortunately our folks weren't awfully hard core religiously speaking, just garden variety Czech-Americans who saw the value in well rounded schooling, music, art, foreign language and such. Our dad, a Naval aviator, was usually down for any harmless shenanigans we came up with as long as nobody got hurt. Mom was an eye roller but had 4 boys, 5 counting my dad so what could she do?
Tbf, there are plenty of valid reasons why schools shouldn't celebrate Halloween, but financial inequality's definitely not one of them. Some kids can't afford food, do we do a state-wide ban on lunch breaks too? 🤦🤦🤦😂
I'm of the age when Halloween as a kid was great! Actually, enjoyed Halloween parties and haunted houses into my mid 20s. When I was a kid I lived in a subdivision. For the most part, kids could go around on their on, if not too young. You knew everyone in your subdivision back then. Adults really got into it for the kids. They would dress up to give out candy. I remember one couple that the woman was dressed like a witch, giving out candy, while her husband was beside her ina coffin. Ever kid knew what was coming, but we all still ran screaming when the husband jumped out of the coffin. This "trunk or treat" thing must really suck! Glad I grew up in the good ole' days of Halloween.
Lewis, I Love You!!!!
On 10/17: Trunk or Treat is actually helpful in rural areas, where the homes are crazy far apart.
UNICEF did not exclude trick or treating. I did both as a kid.
When I was a kid 60 yrs ago, the best treats were always the homemade baking. Popcorn balls, rice Krispy squares, fudge cubes, donuts...mmm. Store bought Halloween candies were just rocks wrapped in paper. Back in those days everyone knew everyone else and all were trusted. Well, there was that one creepy old German lady that never spoke to anyone, no kid ever went to her house for fear of ending up like Hansel & Gretel.
Back when I was a kid (before Columbus discovered America), the stores had not yet exploited Holloween with those crappy one-peice costumes and we were forced to make our own. Girls dressed as witches and ballet dancers and we boys dressed as hobos and superman. The superman costume was nothing more than my blue pants with buster brown shoes, my mom's old toilet curtain, one of my dad's old t-shirts stuffed with newspapers to create big muscles and a big "S" I colored on with my crayons. And I was proud of it because at least I wasn't dressed as a hobo! Neighbors would say, "Oh look! Here comes Superman to save the day!" And I would beam with happiness and pride door after door!
4:07 That’s been going on for ages lol
Michael Myers for President
He's got it!
Every year at school we had to make our Halloween costume as part of our grade for Art class. There were some real good ones and a quite a few flops. The worst was a kid that came as a bean bag...with a tear. There were millions of little Styrofoam balls all over the school. The worst part was the kid had a bad case of gas. I never went as a piece of furniture again.
Cancel Halloween? That’s Unamerican! 🎃
Wow man has language! Makes me want to watch mine.( lady woman chick) I cuss worse sailor at work .
I love it He speaks truth!
My mom made me a Darth Vader costume for a school function when I was 11. That was when the original Star Wars was released.
I'm scared enough the rest of the year. At least I know my right wing neighbor will actually wear a mask for once.
🤣😂👍
AMEN
YOU ARE AWESOME
4:02....why wait/use Halloween as one of the few times to meet with old/new neighbors?
Many a time Had too pull off costume - Last minute! LOL Got the one kiddo wanted Then too afraid too wear (vampire) good times !
Totally agree with the guy who hates Trunk or Treat. It’s pathetic
There are places it's worth it. Try living out in the country where going door to door would be three hours of work for 6 pieces of fun-size candy. If you're in the suburbs or the city, then, yeah, it's stupid.
This Halloween, police are searching for a man who is wearing a Lewis Black mask who is going around yelling "Fuck You. There is no treat, just a trick. Remember when we were teenagers there was always the rumor of a Shit Bomb set off at the homes of unfavored members of the community? Well, here it is." Hazmat crews are out working the locations hit by the Fecal Blast Bomber.
The greatest joy we had preparing for Halloween when I was kid was making our own costumes. Then, we went out for UNICEF, brought the money hoe to mail to the charity, and were allowed to go back out to get candy. To this day, I make my own costumes. Won a couple of office costume contests that way. Making your own costumes encourages creativity and engineering skills. Buying them is is encouraging conspicuous consumerism and wasteful spending, also stupid and lazy, IMHO.
Yeah, wear a costume once, throw it away. Maybe, at best, wear it next year or hand it down. Best costume I ever had was just a $20 kit to make my face look like a Terminator with battle damage, rest were my regular clothes and some weight lifting gloves.
The religulous wackos who are dissing Halloween simply do not understand how it started - as ALL HALLOWS EVE...
Leftists are a million times worse about ruining Halloween (social distancing concerns, surgical masks over Halloween masks, rants about cultural appropriation, etc.). The new Puritans are on college campuses.
I love you man, but I do have to say this. In Ellicott City Maryland in 1968, I received an apple, in the neighborhood during trick or treat that contained a razor blade. Fortunately at that time I always quartered my apples so I found it.
Halloween is really about crossing the pre-perihelion of the Taurid Stream and commemorates the people who died from the cosmic impacts and ensuing prolonged darkness which brought about sun worshiping.
Mike
makes sense but it's morphed into childlike imagination turned into acting,,,fun yea for the holiday
☀️
I don’t think do
Samhien is a sabbat that celebrates the last harvest. It's the day also to remember your loved ones that have died.
thank you
Lewis black great comic, Bob hope laughs in heaven
I should write a rant for ya.
I'll be thinkin' on it...
We need to bring back hell night! Look it up
Amen! 😂😅
Kids are told not to talk to strangers but it's ok to go to strangers house's and beg for candy.
If you can’t make a costume out of a towel and some glitter, idk what’s wrong with people. Duct tape is always good.
when I was a kid I was dressed as a hobo every year
A couple costume, a man as a nun (with beard) and a women dressed as Catholic priest.
Dentists make a lot of money shortly after Halloween.
All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.
Love your profile pic!😁👍
Yep... Christmas being pushed earlier and earlier each year.... and the holidays are crossovers too... halloween trees? Stores have 'em... and the candy for each holiday is already eaten up long before the fuckin' holiday arrives..
Top Ten
There needs to be language settings. I am, yet again, getting adverts in languages I don't know.
Don't watch Lewis Black. That's his schtick.
@@markpeverley6343 Its a RUclips problem.
@@rutabagasteu You are right. Just a few minutes ago I was thinking, damn they sure use that word a lot in these things. More than I do.
Today is June 11, 2023 hobby lobby is closed because it’s Sunday and it’s a religious holiday. They don’t put Halloween in their stores anymore because they’re Christian. However if you were ever nuts enough to stroll down the isles of your local how do you lobby this time of year? Do you know what you would find what they referred to as”Fall”. There are pumpkins and Indian. Is that still politically correct to say corn. Scarecrows scarecrows that are Mickey and Minnie gnomes, which I personally cannot stand and 100 million pumpkin spice things. We haven’t even reached the first day of summer, their fourth of July aisle is down to about 20 things at 40% off. I would be willing to bet you that fall will go on sale at 40% off and July 5 then they will start stacking the shelves for Christmas. You can look above the items that are for sale to the upper shelves and you can see Christmas. All you have to do is OK enough and you can see every Christmas trend they’re going to have this year once again it’s June 11, 2023.
I had to unicef for years no joke and also one year my private school made us do a fundraiser and I was broke so i saltily added three dimes in the multipurpose room and stole a free snack and sassed some female staff Lmaoo
I could take it or leave it. I just don't give a sh*!. And our closest neighbor was two miles away, our mailbox was five miles away. We didn't do Halloween.
The myth I love is when people put drugs in candy.The people I know are too greedy to share their drugs.
I was raised by poor parents who didn’t celebrate Halloween, so I never had a costume. Today, I’m a 38 year old, grown ass family man and I would never consider writing a dumbass letter complaining about kids who can’t afford a costume 😂 That’s life, they’ll be fine 💯 Stop your crap and grow up. You always have the choice to keep the kids at home or with a relative 😂
In the third grade my mom and I simply tore a couple of sheets into strips and broke out her make up and ZAP first place mummy in my elementary school.
Why didn’t those parents donate costumes so they could all get to wear one? Or all donate money to distribute to the parents who can’t afford them so they could get to have their kids sent to school with a costume that year? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THINKING OF OTHERS AND CHARITY?!? 😪🙄🤧
Merica!! 🇺🇸