When I was young and drinking in my 20s, my life was chaotic. This evolved way into my 30s and 40s. When i reached 45, i had had enough of the chaos. I stopped kicking things into the long grass and dealt with them immediately. My home was more organised. My bills were paid before I needed to pay them. I started taking more time to look at what i needed to do. Needless to say, none of this can be achieved when you are drunk. I know that the attitude of a hardened drinker is to not care and to hell with the consequences, but I look back now and think what a stupid thing to think. We must all find the time to look back and face what needs to be faced and pay what needs to be paid. I love sobriety, but I also recognise that when you were on the train, you were missing your companion. I still have those feelings.😊
Responsibility brings its own kind of pleasure. But I'm 39 now, there's no way anyone could have drilled that message into the younger me. Thanks for watching, and for the comment.
Stu, I'm proud of you for keeping sober thoughout this setback. I personally know how easy it is to turn to the bottle when things are going wrong. Drinking intially makes the problem disapear in your head but also makes dealing with it properly so much harder in the long run. The anxiety that comes with withdrawal is debilitating. I know exactly where your coming from. I still get little pangs of anxiety everytime i hear the letterbox open, letters drop, my mobile ring, emails or someone knocking on my door. I got myself into some bother at the end of April while in the throws of a heavy drinking binge (Non violent BTW) and i'm still suffering the consequences now. Since then i'm 1 month 1 week into sobriety. It's the only way forward for me. If i can get through this problem sober then i know i can handle anything without going back to the bottle. I've wasted two thirds of my life with a bottle in my hand. I don't intend to waste the remaining third like that. I'm enjoyiing life for the first time in my life and i don't want it to stop. I'm sure we're all better off facing our problems with clear heads and without turning back to drink. Problems can often seem bigger than they really are. You're in a better place now to confront them and get them sorted. Loving your videos brother, they are helping me with my AUD and alot of other brother and sisters out there. Thank you.
Hey congrats on your time once again CJ, good to see you pushing those numbers up. That anxiety when the phone rings, I think a lot of us feel that. It takes a LONG time to go away, even in sobriety.
I’ve always thought that going to an event that will probably lead to a relapse - is definitely not a huge career opportunity 😂 but that’s exactly the justification I would give myself to get shitfaced. Well done for keeping up the good work
You have a remarkable way of unlocking my memories of my relationship with alcohol - thankyou. Out of all the substances I used to escape the way I felt (or indeed accentuate it), alcohol was by far the worst. Always it would be 'the last time' as I crawled my way towards Sainsbury's at 7am for whisky, or queuing alongside vagrants (of course I was a better class of vagrant), at 8am to buy 3 litres of Frosty Jacks, shaking as I poured it into a filthy glass to gulp down the sickly sweet liquid death. Oh, the joyous trips to A&E, walking home in the middle of the night in flip flops in snow. The terror, the loneliness. That is all way back in the past now. Excellent channel my friend
Oh my god the phrase 'Frosty Jacks' made me heave, there's where it all started for me. Gross, toxic stuff. Thanks for watching my stuff and for your comments mate. Are you sober now?
@@_BatCountry Yes I am thankyou, and now work with addicts in a residential rehab. There are so many paths to recovery. Your videos could really help those that struggle particularly with alcohol, though addiction takes no prisoners - pills took me back to alcohol on one relapse. It is an insidious disease, like hell on Earth.
I’m about to go on my first sober, drug-free vacation in 47 years. I’m looking forward to having an actual vacation, and not just getting high in a different place. But I’m prepared to deal with any traveling nightmare I run into by staying calm until it’s over. I didn’t have ID for 16 years because of jumping bail on a drunk driving charge. I couldn’t fly, rent a hotel room, cash a check, buy a piece of property - you name it. Such a treat to be a human again in the eyes of society.
I keep rewatching your videos because im proud of what you're achieving. I initially thought i should call you a role model but realised we are equals. We are brothers & sisters helping each other through our journey to get better. If we feel part of a community of like minded individuals with the same problems we can help each other. Thank you Stuart for your brave videos. I'm not sure i could be so open as you. But I'm getting there, being honest and describing my feelings to people who want to share.
Brilliant and weird video. Jesus, man. What a horrible situation. I hope you get this crap sorted out. You stayed sober. Think about that. The phone and email shit I totally identify with. This is one of your best videos. *edit. The B-roll is really awesome.
I'm sorry that you're going through this at the moment...You are so right about the consequences that continue even long after stopping drinking. I've been waiting 6 years to get my driving licence back and it's been so difficult. I gave it up voluntarily but I never imagined it would take this long to get it back. But being sober is worth it and it is so much easier to face up to things and go through hard times without a drink. Well done for staying so strong. 👏
Thank you so much for sharing your stories. They're so well made and most of them hit home. Im struggling hard in my first week of sobriety and your content is helping me remember why I'm doing this. Much love from the US.
I am also in early sobriety...again. sigh. Found his channel a few weeks ago. Listening definitely helps. Let's keep moving forward without the poison. I wish you all the best. From the U S
One of the worst things about early sobriety is that consequences catch up to you. It feels wrong to you in the moment that you are finally making good decisions, for once in your life, but all these bad things are happening to you. It is a good thing; there is a debt to be paid. It feels unnatural to be punished for sobriety, but it is perfectly natural. The good thing is that it doesn't last forever, and towards the end it all starts to feel more natural and correct.. If you're a drunk you KNOW the scales have been tilted in your favor for far too long. The consequences you face now pale in comparison to those we will undoubtedly face if we ever fall to drinking again. Great video as always, proud of you for staying sober in the face of adversity-- rest assured there is more in store for you and for us all, and you're far better equipped if you're not drunk.
I can 100% relate to the relation between anxiety and alcohol - i also avoided opening my mails, avoiding calls etc. Sounds familiar. Now im sober and I check my mails everyday :D I also developed neuropathy from the drinking only realised it half a year later when the symptoms become more noticable so i got my unexpected health issue from it as well
I think i read up to 25-66% of chronic alcoholics in the USA develope some form of neuropathy. For Peripheral Neuropathy i think its like 50% of cases are related to alcohol abuse, dont quote me on these numbers. I drank for 7 years heavily (1-3 and later 3-4 liters of mostly wine beer and spirits) and overall i started with 13 was my first beer. I also a premature baby, which can lead to all sorts of complication with such issues (nerve development) but im far from an expert by now. I also smoked tobacco from when i was 15 to the age of 19 then i quit due to chronic asthma. Cigarettes are bad for the nerves as well. Afterwards i started with the heavier drnking and so on. Sober now for 1 1/2 year and counting.
Hang in Stuart; these tests may actually strengthen your sobriety. Just knuckle down and do what you have to do to secure your EU residency. You're doing so well and your community are in your corner.
Whoa 😳 that’s quite an ordeal. Although, it’s a headache to deal with any kind of legal situation, being sober will allow you to navigate and see your way through it. You should be proud that you continue to stay sober.
❤thank YOU for this Video- I also Live in Berlin.. and also Love to drink when Travel.. I am currently on the break and find your videos.. Love them🎉❤ good luck and Maybe see see YOU on the Street of Berlin ;) All the Best😊
I love listening to you. If I may say, you come across (to me at least) as a uniquely rare paradoxical phenomenon: a truth telling fantasist. A man whose unbridled imagination would have in the hands of most ordinary people just led to tall tales told in ghastly provincial pubs. But my impression is that something inside you didn't allow you to take the inauthentic path and - at great cost to you - you've actually lived this. It sounds romantic but also dangerous, scary, possibly lethal and sobering.
A journalist once told me their job was "to tell the truth, but make it compelling." I find that to be good advice in general, and I think that's what I'm striving for. Interesting things, interestingly told. Thanks for the comment Jude, you've summarised me quite effectively.
Thank you so much Giles. Really. To be honest, I've made my peace with the fact that I'll never be Prime Minister, but I'm happy to know I'd have your vote.
This episode is very very relevant to my experiences and probably the most important in regards to my relapses and the difficulty in accepting that " I " have a problem and it's my responsibility to sort it out. No good blaming the situation or the unjust attitudes or the unfairness of it all or the people involved. I'm having to accept it was all down to my reactions to the situations that arose in my life and that's what created the shit I'm now in.
"Come gather round people, wherever you roam And admit that the waters around you have grown And accept it that soon Or you'll be drenched to the bone If you're time to you is worth saving Then you better start swimming or you'll sink like a stone" - Bob Dylan
This is rough stuff man. You have a great way of summing things up in ways you know others will relate to. But sheesh this is really complicated, proud of you for being on point and going thru it. Inspiring.
Thanks for being candid and upfront. We all have personal tests I have my eye on a couple on the horizon (don’t think I’ve ever flown sober save once as a child with my grandmother). But appreciate the scale of your challenge and wishing best of luck, Godspeed it will be a huge accomplishment getting through it and I hope proof to us all what it possible for those of us in recovery. ❤️🩹 🍀
You sir are soon to be famous. Do you need an agent? Lol. I jest but in fact I adore this channel and am subscribed. Your voice to me is the equivalent of sitting by a warm fire in a study with velvet curtains and books strewn about. Keep up the good work . God bless you.
This is such a good channel. I’ve recently been cleared of a crime I didn’t commit. The police dropped the investigation, but it wouldn’t have even been an issue in the first place if I’d had my full faculties. For context, I’m a professional with more letters after my name than in it. This stuff can happen to anyone. I ‘just’ drink heavily in the evenings. Forever hungover in the mornings and afternoons. Drinking clears it in the evenings. Train-wrecked. I can feel this channel chipping away at my habit. I feel like I have a coach and a caring brother putting his hand on my shoulder. Much love.
As someone who also lost a passport drunk, I feel your pain. Worst day of my life even though it was resolved relatively easily compared to your situation
My fear is that the unintended long term consequences of my own hard drinking will be some kind health problems like cancer. But I hope I can handle anything as well as you did here and stay sober.
Positive thoughts can help brother, fear and worry will only make it worse u are stronger than most Man U survived alcoholism many don’t peace and love from india
Fascinating video . I don’t know how you cope with all this stuff and staying away from alcohol . I have trouble just with simple tasks and a boring life 😅
Hi, Thank you so much for all your videos. I find the details absolutely fascinating and I admire your courage in relating them with your trademark unvarnished candour. By the way, one very minor question did occur to me though: if you have an Irish passport, why do you choose not to travel on that document? Many thanks
Thanks for the comment, I really appreciate it! And good question. I didn't bring the Irish passport with me when I move to Germany from the UK. That was the real mistake. I should have been traveling on that one from the start. Live and learn.
I live in Berlin, too. This place must feel like purgatory for recovering alcoholics.... I find it intriguing that your main topic about alcoholism and recovery slowly take a backseat to some really obscure stories the more a video of yours progresses. My mind starts drifting of imagining your side quests. (What's your connection to the adult film industry in Bucharest?) Usually you hear stories about how alcohol ruins perfectly healthy and happy lives, as if it was some kind of destructive external force. Your stories and my own brush with addiction made me realize that substance abuse is neither an asset nor a defect or bad luck but simply a feature of ours.
The irony of having to live sober in the worlds literal Beer capital. That’s some real shit. That’s like saying “I got make a new start and stop drinking; I better move to New Orleans!”
@batcountry I just you to know how much you have inspired me. Just one minute ago I reached 30 days of sobriety. I hope all is well with you. And thank you
Wow that's crazy, ye I work in immigration in Ireland and even here it's a bit of a mess knowing what stamp to give partners of UK citizens living in Ireland who had eutreaty rights before Brexit,
What do you do in the adult industry? Films, Toys, Art, Writing, Dance? I'm thinking the worst that its some sleazy bad vibe, lol, but that's foreshadowing.
@@_BatCountry that’s fantastic man!!! I’m doing well myself. I try to check in on people from time to time just to make sure all is good. Take care brother! 🙏
Are you a certain kind of actor, my friend? No judgement in the least! Have just really enjoyed your videos and am curious about the person behind the content that touched me.
Well done. I can relate. Just think if you would have died from All of the madness, you wouldn't have to deal with any of this shit. So just realize that if you survived all of that, you can handle this. The way I look at it, is that one day I stuffed my entire life on a big airplane, along with my individual self, I'll call it alco-airlines. The plane crashed, and burned to a crisp. The only thing that survived was my ass! Everything else, gone! I have to say thank you God for this last chance. I'm far more fortunate than countless others in the ground right now, in spite of losing all. I'm 55, I have my health and sanity. Through it all, I consider myself filthy rich, and fully educated. From now on my days are a precious gift that I will no longer waste. My definition of courage, is to be scared shitless, and doing it anyway. For me, things being better, is better than things being easier. Just always remember how lucky you actually are, and never, never give up.
Love the channel. I gave it a chance when I saw “bat country” with a hope the perspective would be appreciative of a gonzo lens now n then. I’ma Longtime cannabis user but quit drinking because of dad’s penchant for getting perved🍾 I’m irish too (american). Dad has parkinson’s. Hit the bottle like dean martin at his worst, daily for 50 years or more. Musician. While it’s tough to find evidence on this via experts linking it, although some phd’s haaave shown me some reason to believe, you think alcohol is linked to Parkinson’s disease? No cns stuff in our fam
Bat Country my brother lmao, if you're having psychedelic effects from the amount of caffeine you consume it's hard to call it sobriety. That's what we do though; we're "allowed" caffeine so we take it as far as we can. Just be wary of caffeine becoming a solution to the way that you feel inside-- as alcohol used to be. I would much rather see you getting your energy from a higher power than Folgers, know that I mean? All addiction, including to "allowed" drugs like caffeine and sugar, takes us off the path. I have the same destructive relationship with nicotine that I'm half-assedly trying to let go of.
We're allowed to set our own boundaries though, right? It's really a semantic issue: when I say I need to be sober, what I'm actually saying is I must not drink alcohol. That's all. Coffee isn't going to lead me to an alcohol relapse. You could easily argue that I have an addiction to Haribo, because I'm aware that I do - would you say that I'm not sober because of that? Maybe, but it would be a tough sell, since we draw our sobriety lines ourself.
Totally a semantic issue and it totally makes sense to describe not being drunk as being sober. It was just funny to hear you mention sobriety in the same breath as your joke about experiencing colors, lol.
What you share from 20:02 onwards is, imho, a very relatable experience for many addicts and people in recovery. These tasks and experiences tend to produce massive urges for alcohol in me. What do *you* do these days to help you face those unpleasant tasks and experiences while sober?
Hey Peter! I don't have a particular strategy, although one is beginning to form. It involves focusing on the things I want to achieve, and looking past the immediate urge. My girlfriend, who is also sober, is a great help too.
I was sure you were gonna relapse the way you were talking at the start. Were you my family member, I think I'd have physically restrained you, or tried to, to prevent you from taking that trip. Please be careful out there. You've been a great source of entertainment and comfort for me as I wait for my brain to return to normal since I stopped flooding it with synthetic endorphins all the time. I'll be pissed if you disappear.
@@junkequation I'm not going anywhere. Thanks for all your comments tonight, and I can't wait for those real endorphins to take over for you. The real ones are better.
You look like a bird and tall like a fish :D Like me. You told the story when you traveled in drunk, with shaved hair, beard, big good shape and lookes tough, its the bird look but you talk like a fish. I met 20 years a go this biker, man looked like a bird and talked this criminal underworld shit who dont like cops. The man didnt trust me at all and sayed this "you look like a bird and talk like fish" are you a cop :d ..i look what i look but i dont wanna talk that street shit. You sound like this university professor :d
Man what an absurd situation. For sure your drinking has had major consequences but the whole political bullshit situation and how Brexit was carried out, the effects it had on individuals are nonetheless just absurd.
This channel should have more views. You’re very eloquent and your presentation is excellent.
I agree, it should :D
Thanks for watching, and for the comment, I really appreciate it.
AGREE
@@_BatCountryI just found you this week and subscribed. The algorithm is serving you up- give it time
Agree!!
Agree! One of the kindest voices on RUclips.
When I was young and drinking in my 20s, my life was chaotic. This evolved way into my 30s and 40s. When i reached 45, i had had enough of the chaos. I stopped kicking things into the long grass and dealt with them immediately. My home was more organised. My bills were paid before I needed to pay them. I started taking more time to look at what i needed to do. Needless to say, none of this can be achieved when you are drunk. I know that the attitude of a hardened drinker is to not care and to hell with the consequences, but I look back now and think what a stupid thing to think. We must all find the time to look back and face what needs to be faced and pay what needs to be paid. I love sobriety, but I also recognise that when you were on the train, you were missing your companion. I still have those feelings.😊
Responsibility brings its own kind of pleasure. But I'm 39 now, there's no way anyone could have drilled that message into the younger me.
Thanks for watching, and for the comment.
Stu, I'm proud of you for keeping sober thoughout this setback. I personally know how easy it is to turn to the bottle when things are going wrong. Drinking intially makes the problem disapear in your head but also makes dealing with it properly so much harder in the long run. The anxiety that comes with withdrawal is debilitating. I know exactly where your coming from. I still get little pangs of anxiety everytime i hear the letterbox open, letters drop, my mobile ring, emails or someone knocking on my door. I got myself into some bother at the end of April while in the throws of a heavy drinking binge (Non violent BTW) and i'm still suffering the consequences now. Since then i'm 1 month 1 week into sobriety. It's the only way forward for me. If i can get through this problem sober then i know i can handle anything without going back to the bottle. I've wasted two thirds of my life with a bottle in my hand. I don't intend to waste the remaining third like that. I'm enjoyiing life for the first time in my life and i don't want it to stop. I'm sure we're all better off facing our problems with clear heads and without turning back to drink. Problems can often seem bigger than they really are. You're in a better place now to confront them and get them sorted. Loving your videos brother, they are helping me with my AUD and alot of other brother and sisters out there. Thank you.
Hey congrats on your time once again CJ, good to see you pushing those numbers up. That anxiety when the phone rings, I think a lot of us feel that. It takes a LONG time to go away, even in sobriety.
I am mesmerized by your stories and voice. Keep up the great work.
Thank you so much, I really appreciate that!
I’ve always thought that going to an event that will probably lead to a relapse - is definitely not a huge career opportunity 😂 but that’s exactly the justification I would give myself to get shitfaced. Well done for keeping up the good work
I'm not even an alcoholic but the presentation si just too good and the stuff is very interesting as well
Thanks so much!
You have a remarkable way of unlocking my memories of my relationship with alcohol - thankyou. Out of all the substances I used to escape the way I felt (or indeed accentuate it), alcohol was by far the worst. Always it would be 'the last time' as I crawled my way towards Sainsbury's at 7am for whisky, or queuing alongside vagrants (of course I was a better class of vagrant), at 8am to buy 3 litres of Frosty Jacks, shaking as I poured it into a filthy glass to gulp down the sickly sweet liquid death. Oh, the joyous trips to A&E, walking home in the middle of the night in flip flops in snow. The terror, the loneliness. That is all way back in the past now. Excellent channel my friend
Oh my god the phrase 'Frosty Jacks' made me heave, there's where it all started for me. Gross, toxic stuff.
Thanks for watching my stuff and for your comments mate. Are you sober now?
@@_BatCountry Yes I am thankyou, and now work with addicts in a residential rehab. There are so many paths to recovery. Your videos could really help those that struggle particularly with alcohol, though addiction takes no prisoners - pills took me back to alcohol on one relapse. It is an insidious disease, like hell on Earth.
I’m about to go on my first sober, drug-free vacation in 47 years. I’m looking forward to having an actual vacation, and not just getting high in a different place. But I’m prepared to deal with any traveling nightmare I run into by staying calm until it’s over. I didn’t have ID for 16 years because of jumping bail on a drunk driving charge. I couldn’t fly, rent a hotel room, cash a check, buy a piece of property - you name it. Such a treat to be a human again in the eyes of society.
You are very well spoken. I hope you can resolve the situation.
Thanks! Things always turn out for the best.
I keep rewatching your videos because im proud of what you're achieving. I initially thought i should call you a role model but realised we are equals. We are brothers & sisters helping each other through our journey to get better. If we feel part of a community of like minded individuals with the same problems we can help each other. Thank you Stuart for your brave videos. I'm not sure i could be so open as you. But I'm getting there, being honest and describing my feelings to people who want to share.
Very true. Addiction is connection.
Well done stu! Your a good example for us all on how to climb out of a deep hole. May the power protect you ✨️ 🙏
ONE DAY AT A TIIIIIME!!!
Thanks :D
Brilliant and weird video. Jesus, man. What a horrible situation. I hope you get this crap sorted out. You stayed sober. Think about that. The phone and email shit I totally identify with. This is one of your best videos. *edit. The B-roll is really awesome.
Thanks so much Shades! I'll get it sorted - it's the kick in the ass I needed to finally get my life back on track.
I'm sorry that you're going through this at the moment...You are so right about the consequences that continue even long after stopping drinking. I've been waiting 6 years to get my driving licence back and it's been so difficult. I gave it up voluntarily but I never imagined it would take this long to get it back. But being sober is worth it and it is so much easier to face up to things and go through hard times without a drink. Well done for staying so strong. 👏
Thanks Kate, and good luck with your license.
Well said !
Thank you so much for sharing your stories. They're so well made and most of them hit home. Im struggling hard in my first week of sobriety and your content is helping me remember why I'm doing this. Much love from the US.
Congrats on making the hardest and bes decision of your life. Stick with it, tough it out, and keep us posted. It's worth it in the long run.
I am also in early sobriety...again. sigh. Found his channel a few weeks ago. Listening definitely helps. Let's keep moving forward without the poison.
I wish you all the best. From the U S
One of the worst things about early sobriety is that consequences catch up to you. It feels wrong to you in the moment that you are finally making good decisions, for once in your life, but all these bad things are happening to you. It is a good thing; there is a debt to be paid. It feels unnatural to be punished for sobriety, but it is perfectly natural. The good thing is that it doesn't last forever, and towards the end it all starts to feel more natural and correct.. If you're a drunk you KNOW the scales have been tilted in your favor for far too long. The consequences you face now pale in comparison to those we will undoubtedly face if we ever fall to drinking again. Great video as always, proud of you for staying sober in the face of adversity-- rest assured there is more in store for you and for us all, and you're far better equipped if you're not drunk.
Well done.
I can 100% relate to the relation between anxiety and alcohol - i also avoided opening my mails, avoiding calls etc. Sounds familiar. Now im sober and I check my mails everyday :D
I also developed neuropathy from the drinking only realised it half a year later when the symptoms become more noticable so i got my unexpected health issue from it as well
Hello mate! Thanks for the comment. I haven't seen too many people talking about neuropathy as a result of drinking - is that very common?
I think i read up to 25-66% of chronic alcoholics in the USA develope some form of neuropathy. For Peripheral Neuropathy i think its like 50% of cases are related to alcohol abuse, dont quote me on these numbers.
I drank for 7 years heavily (1-3 and later 3-4 liters of mostly wine beer and spirits) and overall i started with 13 was my first beer. I also a
premature baby, which can lead to all sorts of complication with such issues (nerve development) but im far from an expert by now. I also smoked tobacco from when i was 15 to the age of 19 then i quit due to chronic asthma. Cigarettes are bad for the nerves as well. Afterwards i started with the heavier drnking and so on. Sober now for 1 1/2 year and counting.
"You may be done with the past but the past is not done with you."
I've seen your comments coming in mate, I'll get to all of them shortly. Thanks so much for taking the time to contribute.
Hang in Stuart; these tests may actually strengthen your sobriety. Just knuckle down and do what you have to do to secure your EU residency. You're doing so well and your community are in your corner.
Whoa 😳 that’s quite an ordeal. Although, it’s a headache to deal with any kind of legal situation, being sober will allow you to navigate and see your way through it. You should be proud that you continue to stay sober.
I am, and this is a net positive for me. I was going to have to deal with it at some point.
I spent a lifetime resenting that other people could drink and I couldn't. the I realized that alcohol was not good for anyone. Been sober ever since.
❤thank YOU for this Video- I also Live in Berlin.. and also Love to drink when Travel.. I am currently on the break and find your videos.. Love them🎉❤ good luck and Maybe see see YOU on the Street of Berlin ;) All the Best😊
If you spot me, grab me and I'll buy you a coffee.
Thanks for the comment, I'm glad you're enjoying my videos!
Lots in here! Travel = booze, full stop. So hard to re-learn.
Yeah, it's one of the hardest parts of staying sober - booze and travel are inextricably linked for me, and I travel a lot.
Thank you for the Awesome Video!!
My pleasure!
I love listening to you. If I may say, you come across (to me at least) as a uniquely rare paradoxical phenomenon: a truth telling fantasist. A man whose unbridled imagination would have in the hands of most ordinary people just led to tall tales told in ghastly provincial pubs. But my impression is that something inside you didn't allow you to take the inauthentic path and - at great cost to you - you've actually lived this. It sounds romantic but also dangerous, scary, possibly lethal and sobering.
A journalist once told me their job was "to tell the truth, but make it compelling." I find that to be good advice in general, and I think that's what I'm striving for. Interesting things, interestingly told. Thanks for the comment Jude, you've summarised me quite effectively.
What a fucking brilliant study in self awareness. I love your work and your honesty. Come back to the UK and run for govt.
Thank you so much Giles. Really. To be honest, I've made my peace with the fact that I'll never be Prime Minister, but I'm happy to know I'd have your vote.
Berlin! That is great.
Greetings from a Dutch sailor living in Quedlinburg.
Thanks Arjan, wie geht es mit dir?
This episode is very very relevant to my experiences and probably the most important in regards to my relapses and the difficulty in accepting that " I " have a problem and it's my responsibility to sort it out.
No good blaming the situation or the unjust attitudes or the unfairness of it all or the people involved.
I'm having to accept it was all down to my reactions to the situations that arose in my life and that's what created the shit I'm now in.
"Come gather round people, wherever you roam
And admit that the waters around you have grown
And accept it that soon
Or you'll be drenched to the bone
If you're time to you is worth saving
Then you better start swimming or you'll sink like a stone"
- Bob Dylan
This is rough stuff man. You have a great way of summing things up in ways you know others will relate to. But sheesh this is really complicated, proud of you for being on point and going thru it. Inspiring.
Thanks for being candid and upfront. We all have personal tests I have my eye on a couple on the horizon (don’t think I’ve ever flown sober save once as a child with my grandmother). But appreciate the scale of your challenge and wishing best of luck, Godspeed it will be a huge accomplishment getting through it and I hope proof to us all what it possible for those of us in recovery. ❤️🩹 🍀
And btw it’s not like you work in anything terrible like insurance
You sir are soon to be famous. Do you need an agent? Lol. I jest but in fact I adore this channel and am subscribed. Your voice to me is the equivalent of sitting by a warm fire in a study with velvet curtains and books strewn about. Keep up the good work . God bless you.
Thank you so much Marie, I really appreciate that, and that vibe is absolutely what I'm striving for.
This is such a good channel. I’ve recently been cleared of a crime I didn’t commit. The police dropped the investigation, but it wouldn’t have even been an issue in the first place if I’d had my full faculties. For context, I’m a professional with more letters after my name than in it. This stuff can happen to anyone. I ‘just’ drink heavily in the evenings. Forever hungover in the mornings and afternoons. Drinking clears it in the evenings. Train-wrecked. I can feel this channel chipping away at my habit. I feel like I have a coach and a caring brother putting his hand on my shoulder. Much love.
As someone who also lost a passport drunk, I feel your pain. Worst day of my life even though it was resolved relatively easily compared to your situation
That is some consolation to me. Thanks for the comment!
Ooh! Can't wait to watch this one after work.
My fear is that the unintended long term consequences of my own hard drinking will be some kind health problems like cancer. But I hope I can handle anything as well as you did here and stay sober.
Positive thoughts can help brother, fear and worry will only make it worse u are stronger than most Man U survived alcoholism many don’t peace and love from india
I quit 2 summers ago. 1 box wine, 1 case beer, a week. Gone
Fascinating video . I don’t know how you cope with all this stuff and staying away from alcohol . I have trouble just with simple tasks and a boring life 😅
For me, boredom is the real enemy. At least this chaos keeps me occupied I guess!
Great video ! Thanks for the content.
Thanks mate!
This really resonated with me. Thank you for making this video and sharing about this 💛
Hey Anna! Despite the various trials and tribulations, in pure production terms this one was a fun one to make.
@@_BatCountry that's what matters :)
Bat, we've got your back. Stay strong. You have a lot of people behind you. We depend on your health and wellbeing.
Thanks
Hi,
Thank you so much for all your videos. I find the details absolutely fascinating and I admire your courage in relating them with your trademark unvarnished candour.
By the way, one very minor question did occur to me though: if you have an Irish passport, why do you choose not to travel on that document?
Many thanks
Thanks for the comment, I really appreciate it! And good question. I didn't bring the Irish passport with me when I move to Germany from the UK. That was the real mistake. I should have been traveling on that one from the start. Live and learn.
The train footage was like the Star Guitar video from Chemical Brothers.
Oh yeah you're right! I wonder if I was subconsciously channeling that
Evidence of the wreckage of my past does reappear once in a while, even after 25 yrs of being alcohol free.
I live in Berlin, too. This place must feel like purgatory for recovering alcoholics.... I find it intriguing that your main topic about alcoholism and recovery slowly take a backseat to some really obscure stories the more a video of yours progresses. My mind starts drifting of imagining your side quests. (What's your connection to the adult film industry in Bucharest?) Usually you hear stories about how alcohol ruins perfectly healthy and happy lives, as if it was some kind of destructive external force. Your stories and my own brush with addiction made me realize that substance abuse is neither an asset nor a defect or bad luck but simply a feature of ours.
The irony of having to live sober in the worlds literal Beer capital. That’s some real shit. That’s like saying “I got make a new start and stop drinking; I better move to New Orleans!”
@batcountry I just you to know how much you have inspired me. Just one minute ago I reached 30 days of sobriety. I hope all is well with you. And thank you
30 days!? KONRAD! Thank you so much for coming back and telling me, I am so happy for you. Wow, congratulations mate.
Wow that's crazy, ye I work in immigration in Ireland and even here it's a bit of a mess knowing what stamp to give partners of UK citizens living in Ireland who had eutreaty rights before Brexit,
Oh hey well if you spot my in Ireland in the next couple of weeks, don't hesitate to say hello!
this is good stuff
What do you do in the adult industry? Films, Toys, Art, Writing, Dance? I'm thinking the worst that its some sleazy bad vibe, lol, but that's foreshadowing.
In a previous video he said he did marketing for a sex toys.
dude you work in adult industry and then you are surprised you are an alcoholic...
Where did I say I was surprised
" Bat Country " a term coined by Hunter Thompson
Hope all is well my friend!! 🙌
Hey Slayer! All's well here, just been travelling so I've been absent. Catching up now. I hope you're good too mate, and thanks for the check-in.
@@_BatCountry that’s fantastic man!!! I’m doing well myself. I try to check in on people from time to time just to make sure all is good. Take care brother! 🙏
wait, indecent exposure?
Are you a certain kind of actor, my friend? No judgement in the least! Have just really enjoyed your videos and am curious about the person behind the content that touched me.
Oh shit man I am sorry to hear that.
Hey you're Irish! Come to Galway!
Maybe I will.
Well done. I can relate. Just think if you would have died from All of the madness, you wouldn't have to deal with any of this shit. So just realize that if you survived all of that, you can handle this.
The way I look at it, is that one day I stuffed my entire life on a big airplane, along with my individual self, I'll call it alco-airlines. The plane crashed, and burned to a crisp. The only thing that survived was my ass! Everything else, gone! I have to say thank you God for this last chance. I'm far more fortunate than countless others in the ground right now, in spite of losing all. I'm 55, I have my health and sanity. Through it all, I consider myself filthy rich, and fully educated. From now on my days are a precious gift that I will no longer waste. My definition of courage, is to be scared shitless, and doing it anyway. For me, things being better, is better than things being easier.
Just always remember how lucky you actually are, and never, never give up.
You're right mate. Not much scares me these days.
@@_BatCountry I guess they figure that an assport shouldn't have a passport. Lol.
Love the channel. I gave it a chance when I saw “bat country” with a hope the perspective would be appreciative of a gonzo lens now n then. I’ma Longtime cannabis user but quit drinking because of dad’s penchant for getting perved🍾 I’m irish too (american). Dad has parkinson’s. Hit the bottle like dean martin at his worst, daily for 50 years or more. Musician. While it’s tough to find evidence on this via experts linking it, although some phd’s haaave shown me some reason to believe, you think alcohol is linked to Parkinson’s disease? No cns stuff in our fam
Bat Country my brother lmao, if you're having psychedelic effects from the amount of caffeine you consume it's hard to call it sobriety. That's what we do though; we're "allowed" caffeine so we take it as far as we can. Just be wary of caffeine becoming a solution to the way that you feel inside-- as alcohol used to be. I would much rather see you getting your energy from a higher power than Folgers, know that I mean? All addiction, including to "allowed" drugs like caffeine and sugar, takes us off the path. I have the same destructive relationship with nicotine that I'm half-assedly trying to let go of.
We're allowed to set our own boundaries though, right? It's really a semantic issue: when I say I need to be sober, what I'm actually saying is I must not drink alcohol. That's all. Coffee isn't going to lead me to an alcohol relapse. You could easily argue that I have an addiction to Haribo, because I'm aware that I do - would you say that I'm not sober because of that? Maybe, but it would be a tough sell, since we draw our sobriety lines ourself.
Totally a semantic issue and it totally makes sense to describe not being drunk as being sober. It was just funny to hear you mention sobriety in the same breath as your joke about experiencing colors, lol.
What you share from 20:02 onwards is, imho, a very relatable experience for many addicts and people in recovery.
These tasks and experiences tend to produce massive urges for alcohol in me. What do *you* do these days to help you face those unpleasant tasks and experiences while sober?
Hey Peter! I don't have a particular strategy, although one is beginning to form. It involves focusing on the things I want to achieve, and looking past the immediate urge. My girlfriend, who is also sober, is a great help too.
Fallout can b a trigger
I was sure you were gonna relapse the way you were talking at the start. Were you my family member, I think I'd have physically restrained you, or tried to, to prevent you from taking that trip. Please be careful out there.
You've been a great source of entertainment and comfort for me as I wait for my brain to return to normal since I stopped flooding it with synthetic endorphins all the time. I'll be pissed if you disappear.
@@junkequation I'm not going anywhere. Thanks for all your comments tonight, and I can't wait for those real endorphins to take over for you. The real ones are better.
Screw the train ride that singing is torture enough.
Ha ha
You look like a bird and tall like a fish :D Like me. You told the story when you traveled in drunk, with shaved hair, beard, big good shape and lookes tough, its the bird look but you talk like a fish.
I met 20 years a go this biker, man looked like a bird and talked this criminal underworld shit who dont like cops. The man didnt trust me at all and sayed this "you look like a bird and talk like fish" are you a cop :d ..i look what i look but i dont wanna talk that street shit. You sound like this university professor :d
I love this. Thanks for the comment!
So you have an Irish passport, how can you be banned from the EU when you're an EU citizen? Pardon my ignorance but this is really shocking
I've been wrestling with that for 3 months now. There are very few clear answers on this stuff.
Man what an absurd situation. For sure your drinking has had major consequences but the whole political bullshit situation and how Brexit was carried out, the effects it had on individuals are nonetheless just absurd.
Why are all the people arriving in Europe by boat not subject to the same scrutiny and laws as Europeans merely traveling for business?
People in the UK arriving by boat are being sent to Rwanda so I got it easy mate.
I take it that by ‘adult’ industry you mean pornography? If so your life is still badly mixed up.
Stay strong and brave 👍😉
ODAAT :D