Coming Home - Post Travel Depression & Reverse Culture Shock
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- Опубликовано: 27 авг 2024
- Coming home after traveling the world for 1 1/2 years, facing post travel depression and reverse culturre shock almost seems unavoidable. This video is about how it feels to come back from traveling longterm and how I deal with the situation.
Fun fact (not really funny) I realized through making this video, how much I'm actually going through this process without conciously noticing it throughout the last months. The effect of traveling longterm and what it does with you after returning is real.
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#traveltheworld #posttraveldepression #reversecultureshock
post travel blues, vacation blues, coming home after traveling, coming home after traveling the world, coming home after traveling abroad, culture shock, after travel depression, travel depression, how to deal with travel, how to deal with post travel depression, travel thoughts, travel tips and hacks, returning home from traveling
It’s like you are at an airport, moving, going down, going up, looking for passport, and everything and you suddenly find yourself in your house without any movement or hurry.
That’s like a big temperature change or like everything was going fast and then you are quiet.
That's pretty good description of how it feels. Though, after some time I find myself confronted with same feelings while being back. I guess we humans are still nomads at heart.
I returned "home" for the first time in 2 years a few days ago...I quickly realised how out of place I felt, how fragile my identity felt after everyone imposing their views of who they thought I was back onto me.
The growth and the experiences that shape you during your travels do not stay in those places, you carry them wherever you go within your character. Its hard not to become a product of your environment but ultimately you have the power to choose who you want to be. My advice is to let this experience of being home contrast what you do and dont want in life and to use it as opportunity to show up as the person you know you are.
beautiful comment 🙏 and your are spot on!
going through it right now! recently got back from my year on the suitcase. Never experienced such a thing before - absolute numbness & extreme feeling of not belonging in my own home country. Isolation 100000%. And at the same time "over-analyzing" on the next steps (lack of direction). Weird! thank you for this video, at least now I know what's up :)
thank you for your comment, Laura 🙏 Hang in there! As stupid as it may sounds, but things will calm down with time and I am sure you will find your way
same. you’re not alone, girl!
Wow!! You summed it up PERFECTLY
I just flew home from an amazing trip and can’t stop crying because I just want to go back on holiday and I don’t want to go back to school so thank you
You'll be alright, eventually.
Omg same! I just got back from a 7 day camping trip one of the best I’ve had, I went with my family and had to say bye to my dad as he left from the caravan park to go to a town nearby which is 3 hours away from my house then in about a week my mum will go to I’m crying about the fact that soon I’ll be lonely again during the week and also super upset my trip is over and I have school in about 3 days.
Did you overcome that ?
@@nerminawsy yes aha it took like a bit but after some time definitely
“I’ve lost home” I hear you man! I haven’t traveled (much) since February. I relate to that feeling of just wanting to leave and not say goodbye. It’s a bit of escapism for me I think. I dunno. We will figure it out someday I guess. Also I wanted to say I love that KL video! I found your channel last night. So glad I did. Absolutely, love the style of that video! It is exactly what I like. Cinematic with real substance!! Now I will gently smash the like button. ✊🏻
my man! love to hear, how much you like the KL film 🙏 and regarding your situation, I think that's totally normal. Having the exact same thought, but sometimes you just need to push through things before truly embracing them.
Thanks for this video and honesty. I traveled around the world by bicycle for 13 years, during that time I came home 3 times for a short time (2-3 months each), and on the last occasion I was not home for 5 years. And now I'm completely lost and I think I have depression. Life on the road became my comfort zone, and this return to the "previous life" is for me a step out of the comfort zone, and because of that I feel bad, scared, lost..
this happen on my trip a couple weeks ago. It felt like I was entering a new life when it was my regular way of living. It effects all of us.
It really is a phenomenon. Thought, it says a lot about our perception of norms and normality - whatever that might be 🤷🏻♂️
What you say at 10:14 about not trying to be the person you were in the past...that is what stays with me from this video. It also provides a meaningful thing to reflect on regularly, regardless of whether you have travelled to other places or not. Interesting to see that the person you think you are is a construction, based on subjective narratives and emotional imprints that are largely generated by the mind and its desires for stable identity. i travelled for more than a decade non-stop, and am familiar with the depression of returning to the US (which i still see as one of the most psychologically disturbed cultures on earth) and grieving deeply. the thing is tho...while traveling, i also experienced the ups and downs of life, except the novelty of experience served as stimulation and i could chalk up the challenges to being on an adventure. yet the same thing is possible even if you never step outside your backyard...it is an attitude. whenever an identity gets solidified, along comes the feeling of being trapped and wanting to be somewhere else, to even be someone else. travel is an easy shift to make to temporarily fulfill these desires...and i mean temporarily. because it also becomes an identity in itself. and to my view, the attitudes we carry define our experience much more profoundly than any external condition. there is no home and no refuge in a world of continually changing conditions...there isnt even refuge in one's own identity, which also changes....but the heart, the awareness, and refining attitudes of heart...there is where refuge is found...for me anyway. sometimes it takes traveling around the world to discover this... thanks for sharing. wishing you well.
thank you for the thoughtful comment, Nico! I think you are spot on. Creating the New Zealand series two years after returning, it became undeniably clear to me how much has and how much I have changed. If you are interested in exploring the ambiguity of identity a bit further I recommend the "person section" of Derek Parfit's book Reason and Person (although, that's a tough read) or engaging a bit in the teleportation though experiment of his. Other than that - I know this is a bit of a shameless plug - I've just put up a video on Novelty Seeking and the range of what it actually means. Maybe that's interesting for you as-well. Wishing you all the best!
@@JustWojtek thanks for the book and video recommendation. i actually explore the ambiguity of identity frequently, having practiced buddhism for quite awhile now. the fundamental misperception from which our difficulties arise tends to be a deluded belief in separate selves (separate objects) when in reality all things are impermanent and interdependent in a way that is impossible for the intellect to fully fathom. as we are caught up in ideas and notions much of the time, this misperception makes for all kinds of challenges and struggles, all basically wrapped around identity. but through practice there is a way through, and even out, of this delusional way of perceiving things. interesting to contemplate these themes. wishing you well on your adventures. :)
This was a great read. I think Identity is something that has crossed my mind but I've never really considered how I'm going to conduct myself when I'm back home. Am I a different person from when I left 3 years ago? Absolutely, but I believe a lot of my new attributes will only better serve me in my future now. Having served in the military for 8 years and then coming to live in Australia for 3 years to travel and work by myself I feel like I was prepared to adapt to a new environment and I will do the same coming home.
Thanks man. I only went away for two weeks to the U.K., where I lived previously and saw all my friends and my brother, had so much fun in those two weeks.
Since I moved to my current country, I did online schooling so don’t have that many people to talk to here and coming back felt like such a isolating and depressing feeling. Appreciate this video. Helps me feel at ease and more accepting.
If there is no one around, maybe try reaching out - either physical or online - people are really at the core of everything we do - no matter the country we stay in.
The UK is an amazing country. I literally just returned and I absolutely loved it there, what a great culture. I hope you find your way man
My dude! You are hitting the nail on the head! Thank you so much for making this video :) all my mates from abroad I accumulated over the last several years just keep on travelling cuz they don't like this feelling or they chose to ignore it. Thank you for this, I feel a bit better because of this :)
Thanks so much, Karel! Glad you can relate to this. Not sure, how it’s for you but I fell once you accept it, the journey continues- just in a different way
People Not understanding what you experienced and pressing you into your old mold is really exhausting.
I can relate, but it's also a form of empathy to understand and see things from their point of view. meanwhile you still can keep doing you.
i've been living the nomad lifestyle for 5 years now, and i only visit home during the holidays (like right now) once or twice a year. and EVERYTIME i come back home... i go through this. i try to keep myself as occupied as much as possible, gym, meeting friends, etc... i've also tried isolating myself last year i was here and it was okay... but i still felt very much depressed and not "at home." i feel like i've evolved, changed, and gained new perspectives while traveling and whenever i come home.. nothing has changed, friends/family all still very much like how they were before i last saw them. it's almost as if they live in a "bubble"... and i feel like i've escaped that bubble and can't go back in (nor do i ever want to go back in). it's really difficult to describe that feeling but i feel like you'd understand (at least the 4 year ago you that i'm watching right now). not sure if you've seen anthony bourdain documentary but i would totally understand what he's gone through, it's definitely a real struggle. great video, thank you!
I think I've been through something similar this year. Coming back often comes with confrontation. If feel like our old homes have a way of storing old emotions and when we return they get thrown at us without a warning. Might be interesting to see if your experience changes, when you go back the next time and you engage this side of the experience curious and openly.
I just came back home from traveling and I just want to say thank you for this video. it made me feel less alone with all these feelings I've been feeling since I'm back.
I'm happy to hear this resonate with you, wishing you the best 🙏
I just hit the road for a month to the USA and got to see my parents whobl left canada. It was my first time leaving canada in 11 years. I saw joshua trees, the grand canyon, zion, the insanity that is LA, the beaches of san diego. I feel like the people i met and my experiences have me in a mindset far removed from everyone here. Its an adjustment. You dont experience that much without having an adjustment afterwards.
sounds interesting. would you mind to elaborate on that a bit more?
Totally feel you. 1:1 same situation and I feel like everything is just a phase. And if you see it like that nothing can stress you out too much. Just making the best decisions in certain situations all in all to not have regrets.
So true. Just realizing more an more, that there need to be less enjoyable phases, to truly celebrate the good times.
Having 2 places I can call home makes it really hard to travel between the two because once I get used to one again going back to the other one feels wrong. When I moved countries I was able to begin a new life and improve myself a bit which was great but when I was back in my country of birth and where most of my family lives ,where I didn’t have the best experiences as a child, and now that I’m older and people have changed I felt good there as I was happy to see my old classmates even though I didn’t really talk to the when we were younger and leaving that hurt so much.
Now I just wish that I could bring the two worlds together.
I kinda feel this. In the country I grew up, I will always be an immigrant, in the country I was born I will always been an outsider. None of these places really are home, yet both of them are supposed to be. I don’t know, but maybe one challenge of modern life might be to create your own version of “home”
I went abroad for the first time to France, Switzerland, and Germany in September. I have been so empty since returning, which is strange because towards the end of my trip I was homesick a bit, but here I am mourning over what I feel I am losing out on. My eyes have been opened to such beauty, such history, some places so magical beyond description. I miss the exhaustion of endless walking, I miss finding new and interesting things. I miss the strangeness and newness of it all.
What keeps you from going back to it?
This is great content! It resonated with me unbelievably deeply, thank you!
I'm happy to hear that! thank you 🙏
I just got back to the US from a 7 day trip to Japan and I spent only one day with friends.. the time was very short but I am extremely sensitive and I already feel a kind of depression and lost. It’s a loss of identity and I don’t know where I belong. I’ve been sleeping all through the day and feels like I don’t fit in here. I feel isolated and disconnected from my current setting. It feels like part of my heart is still back there. It was only 7 days, but I cannot imagine how I would feel if I had stayed there for longer or lived there. The way I am handling it is by being gentle and meditating and allowing myself to grow. Definitely good advice thanks
I just heard someone saying yesterday: "we are always in the process of becoming", and I guess that goes for the post travel experience as-well. Something is changing and something new emerging. Best wishes for you next chapter 🙏
Not sure, if I made this video for you or myself, haha. Anyone else going through this right now? Anyone ever been through this?
I’ve definitely felt this in the past. Not sure if I was depressed but have been sad and wished I was back where I was. I’ve found the best way to deal with this is to always have something to look forward to by having another trip planned out.
@@TheWorldnUs that's so true! But I figured it can be different things. Not only travel, but also starting a business, moving to another city, pretty much anything that feels like a step forward
After traveling, even if it was a 5 days trip, when I return I feel really bad.
If you are in a hotel or just traveling, you’ll see the same people everyday even if you don’t talk to them... and not only talking about people (which is the most shocking) but the place, weather, and also negative aspects of the trip... suddenly you stop seeing that and everything turns just to thoughts. That’s what makes me sad.
Me I’m feeling this intensely even though I only spent 2.5 weeks in Bali. It was one of the most emotionally, spiritually, and identity-wise intense trips I’ve gone on in a long time even though I’ve lived in other places for longer periods of time before. I didn’t expect myself to feel this way.
prepared for this shit, but it just hits so hard
and it always hits. but it will get better eventually.
I don’t feel the identity of me since I am back home , I just came from china after 20 days there, i was very happy and excited there, I made friends and I loved the country from the bottom of my heart i knew i will come back home so why am I so sad that I came back, I almost cry when i remember all the good vibes as if I said goodbye to my best friend not just a country
The version of me there was so pure and true
I hope you are doing well. Every goodbye is heartbreak but a heartbreak often is needed, so we can let go, move on and maybe even come back one day - changed, and ready to move even further than before.
I had just over a month away and got back to Sydney 3 days ago. I’m not ok right now but this video really helped. Thank you so so much as your words totally resonated with me. ❤️
I'm happy to hear that! You'll make it through eventually and the next adventure certainly awaits - someday
I just returned from 2 weeks in Africa. That was my first time out of the USA. I’ve been in vacation before in the states and always had a good time and was sad when I was home but this is different. I am utterly depressed right now. I have never been in a country that felt so much like home. And I know when you are on a vacation the circumstances are different. You don’t have work or the same responsibilities as normal life. But I felt I just connected so much with the country I was in. I’m really having a hard time coping right now. Africa was so beautiful. I loved the minimalism, the environment, the culture of the country I was in. It just felt different and I felt more connected to life. Things feel so pointless now. I know I will get over it, but it’s very difficult right now. I’ve never felt this way before . I almost wish I never even went in the first place because of how much I am struggling.
I hear you. But do you really wish you didn’t go? And even if you entertain that thought, the reality is you went and made beautiful experiences. The question you might want to face and finds an answer to is: How do you want to move from here?
It might take a while, but I’m sure you’ll make it through and maybe you find a more fulfilling path for you and you life in the process.
Just came back from my first solo trip that also was in Africa, and completely feel the same as you. I just felt connected to their way of living and it's really difficult for me to come back to a big city. Hope you're doing better!
@@miacouillet2420 Solo trips, especially, hit differently, I guess... Sharing the same feeling with you. I was at my peak of confidence, meeting new people, visiting the places I wanted, and connecting with others was an outstanding experience in itself. Now, I have a 9-to-5 shift tomorrow. Can't believe it.
KL article was awesome...it has depth and voiced out the real screaming souls. Thank u for doing this..
comments like these mean the world to me, thank you 🙇
I don't know if you'll read this, but thank you for that video. It makes me feel less alone. I returned home 2 years ago and even after this long time, I wasn't able to overcome my negative feelings of coming home. I feel like I don't belong here and never will. I think it would be different if my relatives and friends were more understanding of what I experienced and if they accepted that I'm a different person now. People here also don't seem to be very happy in my country and they complain all the time about the most minuscule things. Which is crazy to me, considering that I slept in dirt, saw children in the streets, died almost at least one time etc.. It's so surreal. And at home it's hard to socialize on top of that, because people here aren't as open minded unfortunately. My travels entirely changed me and the way I feel about life. I've been through crazy things and overcame many struggles by myself. The things that I saw and felt are things I can never forget. I came to this realization now that I will never be able to fit back in. What hurt me the most is that most people didn't care about my experiences at all. I never talk about it, unless they ask me, just to be clear - I don't want to come across as arrogant, because I'm not. I just feel so different about life in general.
Quite some time has passed since you wrote this comment. I hope you are doing well and you found a way to integrate your experiences.
Hiiii Wojtek! (totally had to dig around to find the spelling of your name haha) I've been meaning to write to you since NZ. It was super lovely connecting with you and Kat. Loving your message and what you're sharing. I haven't been in the exact situation as I don't travel as long term as you do but it's something I've considered. Keep spreading the thoughts and message
Not the most common name, right? haha, thanks so much for writing me/us and lovely to hear from you 🙌 just thought a few days ago about what you guys are doing these days. regards and all the best, from kat aswell 🙏
I loooove you know! You just describe almost exactly how I feel
Happy to hear this resonated with you!
Hey man,
This for me on a personal level, is one of the best videos I've watched on RUclips.
I'm currently in Perth Australia and have been in Aus since July 2019. I haven't been able to go home because of covid as I have been so fortunate and greatful to work in the mining industry.
What scares me the most is that it could almost be 3 years before I even return home because it wouldn't be logical to return home at this time. So when you spoke about going home 2 times and each experience was different, it hit me a little bit that I was going to be experiencing this same feeling but potentially when my journey ends.
On another note, I do feel as though my experience in Aus has just become abit "normal" due to travel restrictions and random cases appearing in different states apart of me is not sure if I'm actually looking forward to coming home for some stability.
Hey Sean, thank you for your comment. Seems you've been thinking a lot on this. I have recently been speaking with a lot on travellers on this particular topic and what I can say for sure is, that it is a bit different for everyone.
What I'm also sure of is, that there will come a time, that's uncomfortable - it won't feel good - but that's where it kind of resembles the fresh and green behind the ears beginning of travels. It's a new chapter, something is about to change in your life and your brain won't like that. Human brains like predictable patterns, breaking them causes effort and evolutionary we are programmed for energy conservation, yet - ambiguously - it's very often these kind of experiences that actually push our life forward.
In that sense: Don't think to much about what's logical (of course consider and consult reason to your decisions), but rather try making a decision, that feels good and right - at least, that's what I would do.
Once you're back home (or not), it's up to you what you will make of it.
@@JustWojtek Cannot believe this was a year ago. I'm due home in 3 weeks. I like to come back to this video from time to time.
@@mc4105 time truly flies, doesn't it?
@@JustWojtek It really does. I was a very different person then to what I am now. I'm already planning my next adventure, but I'm looking forward to some down time with family and friends. 3 years is a long time.
@@JustWojtek Been back for 3 weeks and it's been very interesting for sure. It was difficult to begin with and it's been weird having to apply for jobs again and working on CV. Got 3 job interviews this week, so things are getting real now.
But I think it all comes down to the individual and their expectations.
Having now caught up with most of my social circles I totally agree with you when it comes to talking about all these amazing adventures, I had in Australia but then I feel bad because of pandemic.
I'm slowly reaching the ending point of my trip right now and I can't help but having a lot of stress about what should I do, where should I go, etc. I'm in this situation where I'm running out of money and I don't want to go back and just rush into finding a job just ot pay my shit... I'm feeling stuck because I will have no choice but to find one and work af just to pay my rent and my food. I'm really disappointed. I would just love to keep on travelling, to be somewhere else. My travelling ends in 2 months and a half now. It's still quite far, but in few days, I'll be moving to europe for the end of my trip and I can't help but to feel like my travelling is ending now since I'm going back into this occidental lifestyle. It's freaking hard to come back...
I feel you and I can relate. It sounds to me, like you are very cautious of your return. In my personal experience coming back can also hold a lot of positive aspects. Thinking about the positives can help to change perspectives and find other options and new possibilities. After my wife and I came back, we moved to a new city and got new jobs in a new environment, that helped us to not fall back into old patterns and keep on moving into a desirable direction. Maybe this is an option for you as-well. One more thing I definitely recommend is seeking out co-livings in Europe. We only discovered this live style last year and it was a total game changer - places full of likeminded remote workers, travellers and digital nomads. I made reviews about two co-livings in Spain. Maybe these are places to start a new chapter for you, after your return.
I also had a similar experience when leaving Australia to return to the UK.
Things that are helping me, is having a plan on what am I going to do when I return.
Maybe you need to return back to your home country to complete a few things (eg studies, pay off debt, save up) and that will allow you in the future to live your life on your terms.
It's definitely hard. But you got this, and hopefully you will be back travelling in no time
its been three months since i came back to spain from studying abroad in south Korea for a year and I'm still going through this
there is no predestined time frame for this, unfortunately. anything you struggle with in particular?
This makes me feel better about my ambivalence. There is so much reverse culture shock, even despite being aware of the phenomenon and trying to prepare for it.
Definitely - you can prepare for it, but you also have to embrace it, I guess.
When I was watching this video it seemed you were reading my mind. I exactly know what you mean👍👍🌹
thank you and I hope you find a great way to move on 🙇🏻♂️🙏
Tolles und interessantes Video! Unsere Heimkehr steht uns jetzt auch kurz bevor und wir sind etwas nervös und zwiegespalten deswegen 😅 Also tut es gut zu hören, wie andere damit umgehen :)
Das wird schon :) Und ihr entscheidet maßgeblich, wie es wird. Wie lange wart ihr dann all in all unterwegs?
Way of Pirate Wir reisen seit Februar. Es ist krass, wie schnell man den Reisealltag so verinnerlichen kann 😄 Du hast auf alle Fälle recht. Wir sind gespannt, was jetzt so kommt, evtl. landen wir nächstes Jahr auch schon wieder im Ausland :)
@@Reiseskizzen könnt ich verstehen :)
I wouldn't recommend backpacking for a year and then start Uni 5 days after you came back, hehe. Wasn't the best choice I'd say xD
wasn't the best plan, I guess :D
Way of Pirate haha nah it wasn’t, too much of all that of what you talked about in the video +! new lots of impressions AND work😆
Going through that now! 😢
Thanks for the video!
You got this!
Just came back from a week in Rome, learned the language enough to communicate on a certain level but now I'm back in united states and feel sad, for one the food in Italy is less processed and has less chemicals than the states, they take pride in their foods, one of the biggest reasons why I feel like wanted to stay, now I'm back and it's truly sad the way we live as a society
sounds like reverse culture shock - it definitely is a thing - and it will settle after a while, but you can still take away from that experience what you would wish your life to look like in the future
I just wanna meet more people who have traveled 😢
you can! there is meet up's, communities, co-living (mostly in Europe) - all great ways to meet likeminded people
Thanks for sharing your experience
Thank you so much
What have you have achieved living with the locals of Delhi? Will the locals of Delhi see that as an achievement you trying to live their daily chores and just repeating what they've done all their lives?
I was vERY SAD IN 2022 THAT I LEFT LEGOLAND
Damn! What did Lego Batman say to that?
thank u man
🙏🏻
Einigen Punkten stimme ich dir zu, anderen wiederum nicht. Aber was mich und vielleicht auch andere brennend interessiert, wie geht es nun weiter? Werdet ihr wieder sesshaft oder brennt euch schon der Hintern? :D
Ich sag ja: Zurückkommen ist wie Reisen eine sehr individuelle Sache :) Ich würde dir gerne mehr zu unseren Zukunftsplänen verraten, aber die Wahrheit ist: Ich weiß es nicht. Wir haben Pläne, aber die reichen aktuell nicht weiter als ein, zwei Jahre.
...und ey, mal ehrlich: Also ob wir nicht den Rest der Welt noch sehen wollen? :D
I got this.
you got it!
Funny how all these 'travellers' look like they think they are 'better' than 'non travellers'. It all doesn't matter. It means nothing.
Interesting opinion. Explains that to me.
Chilli, where's the Chilli??
Wait, what? :D
Massive massive problem isn't it. If it is such a problem don't travel !
Wow. That’s smart.