To the people that have the parents that get mad after you say you’re not hungry, when you sleep all day, like they can see that you’re struggling and they just get mad at you and call you “lazy” when it so much to get out of bed, so if you woke up, if you got up today, I am so proud of you. If you ate to day, I’m proud, I’m so proud of you! They don’t have to proud.. but just remember that someone out there is, I am proud of you, all of you.. “You are enough just as you are” -Meghan Markle
I have a lot to vent about so buckle up! I used to wish that I would die when I was about 8 so then I would get into heaven (I was told that if a person dies before they mature then they enter heaven). When I was around 9 years old My dad told all my teachers at the parent teacher conference that I haven’t changed my clothing for a week (a thing he did so that I would be emmbaraced Into doing what he wants). My dad keeps bring up how he would put his toung in our mouths as baby’s (like the fucking 60 year old creep he is) My dad once stalked my mom and then in the middle of the night told me to go with him, in the car he then told me how my mom is a prostitut and how she is fucking the principal, thing is that she isn’t doing any of that and is actually a teacher at my last school but he just wouldn’t believe me. I once was hatted on by a friend so much that I started believing it and actually fell in love with her and obsessed over her (abuse fucks up the brain). I was getting lectured by my dad about spelling (something that happened evey time he saw me), started crying and my mom came in to defend me, long story short the police where called because he threatened to cut up my mom, he then came back a few days later to pickup his stuff and he said to me before leaving that I was the reason this all happened (out of all 3 of my other siblings I had to be the reason). We didn’t hear from his for two years after that but I did, i fucking hallucinated that bitches voice, I heard his footsteps and I heard him enter the house but when I asked around turns out that not a person moved in the time that I swear I heard him. I got into a fight with my mom a year ago about the laundry and then I went into the room and closed the door, i guess wanting privacy is grounds for taking my phone away, she wrestled with me to get it but then got tired and called my siblings on me, my sis held me down and my bro took the phone (tho I did some sick moves like pinning the phone to the ground with my toes cuz my hands were being held behind my back), latter I was trying to go to sleep but she threw my blanket and pillow out the room and had my bro block the door with her, I stayed awake crying and trying to open the door until I tired myself out. She also told me how I deserve to be hit and fucking bumped me into the wall so I can’t enter the room. My dad keeps telling us how we are depressed and need help (he’s been saying this from a time before I knew what it meant) but then he goes on to tell me how he cry’s himself to sleep thing of me and that he is suicidal, at this point I’m not sure I would care if he ended it. I think this might actually be better if he did. Just this year my brother told my dad how he’s turning 10 and my dad said how “when they turn 10 you have to start hitting them” and how it’s in our religion. I was latter in the car with my dad and told him to not talk to my lil bro that way and that then became a fight, I left the car saying how I will never talk to him again, then blocked him and haven’t talked in months. A few weeks ago I had a fight with my mom about how I want lip piercings and she started crying (I did say hurtful things like how I will runaway and get them behind her back) she then took away my phone when I went to the bathroom to cry and started ignoring me, my brothers both hit me and called me many names and made very rude comments on me, when I told my mom about them hitting me she ignored me, she took all electronic because they are “her property” and that if I don’t need her then I don’t need anything she provides. She took my only connection to friends. The worst part is that she didn’t even my the electrics for me but my dad did (they are divorced), I went to sleep crying and then somehow played fanf on the tv without her stoping me and ripping the controller out of my hands, I then went up to her crying saying I don’t want to fight anymore (the ignoring really got to me, I hated it because she’s living her life and being on her phone while I had nothing to do but cry myself to sleep or lock myself in the bathroom to cry some more), she told me that a child like me deserves to be hit (not her first time saying it but still hurts like it did the first time she said it), she also knows that I have thoughts of self harm but I guess she forgot or something (although they aren’t only thoughts now), she only talked to me to fight, she kept saying that she should leave me with my dad and go back to her parents and that it isn’t her job to provide food and shelter (she is my legal guardian), she said some real dumb shit and I am a person who hates agreeing when I don’t and I hate apologizing when I don’t feel in the wrong but I did both just so we can go back to the happy family we were only 3 days earlier, she didn’t accept my apology. She didn’t want to solve what has been making her child cry for hours about, the child who at this point eyes have gone dry and are taking deep scary inhales in between words. I begged her to forgive me, she said that the only way to forgive me is that if I pray. I cried through the fight, I cried while praying and I cried trying to fall asleep but my jaw hurt to much from all the fucking stress she caused me. My sister has been talking to a therapist for a few years now and I just hate how my mom thinks she’s the only one that needs a therapist, even after she was told of my sh thoughts. She even got my brother some therapy which I hate because I was picked on more by my dad then him. He literally defended the old man once. I just hate being sad rn, I hate it because everything’s been great these past weeks, too good. I just know my next low is around the corner, I want to enjoy life but ever time I do I just hit another low. At this point I sh for the fun of it, I never really had a reason to but I guess I just never stopped (I don’t really plan on stopping either), the worst part of it tho is looking back at my younger self and see that all the hitting, pinching and scratching I was doing to myself was self harm, I was only 7, I was to younge to do that to myself but I still do it to this day, habits never die I guess. I’m also not suicidal at the moment but who knows what will happen tomorrow (as I said I do go from being the happiest I’ve been to wanting to never wake). The thing that makes it all worse is religion, Im bisexual and in my religion if I date then I should be killed. I talked about how some ex friends who are also Muslim wished death on a gay guy and how their moms laughed with them and my mom just agreed with them. I tryed telling her that who are we do decide who dies and who goes to heaven but she didn’t like the way I was thinking. I just don’t want this religion anymore. I just want to kiss who I want to kiss without fear of hell. I was talking to my mom about a Muslim girl who doesn’t wear the hijab and my mom said how she wouldn’t let her daughter leave the house like that. It’s just so suffocating thinking that my mom won’t let me take the hijab off if I wanted to. Islam is such a beautiful religion but it’s not for me anymore. There is sooooo much more I want to write about but I’m going to just stop here
My dog had to be put down, he had cancer and we couldn’t afford to pay for it. It was also causing him pain, so we couldn’t let him live like that. He was the sweetest(and stinkiest) dog ever.
I know it must be really really hard for you, you're so strong for staying with him throughout the time he was sick , I can tell you really loved him and im positive he had a happy life being taken care of you
Honestly at this point I’ve just accepted taht I will forever be a danger to myself and no one’s gonna bother to help me I asked our mom if we could be voluntarily checked into a psych ward recently cus I genuinely feel like a danger to myself and the rest of my system and she said no, it really upset my friend who suggested it and at this point I honestly don’t care, I knew how it would go from the start but still tried anyways At least she can’t say I didn’t tell her so if things ever get super bad!
It's a vent tiktok playlist when they said no random music bc usually they put music over the tiktoks to lighten up the mood I'm sorry if I didn't explain well T^T
I have a friend who constantly and knowingly misgenders me and uses wrong pronouns, I can't just leave them alone because no one else likes them because they lie and seek attention due to a bad life at home. I wish anyone else would hang out with them, they don't deserve to be completely alone. Why does it have to be me? The one person they're capable of hurting this way?
I want to tell my siblings the truth. But every time I say what I like, that just gives them one more thing to make fun of. To the point where I can't tell them anything cause they all make fun of groups that are already having too much hate like the LGBT community and the therian community or the scene people. It's sad to the point where I have to act like I dislike them too or I haven't heard of that group and I hate it
@@mc_and_gc_Aus I'm so sorry, I actually deal with this myself, more on the school side. I know how hard it is to be accepted but that is WHO YOU ARE and if your siblings/family have a problem with that, they can deal with it. It is who you are and no one should make fun of who/what you are. May I ask, what are your pronouns?
I have a lot to vent about so buckle up! I used to wish that I would die when I was about 8 so then I would get into heaven (I was told that if a person dies before they mature then they enter heaven). When I was around 9 years old My dad told all my teachers at the parent teacher conference that I haven’t changed my clothing for a week (a thing he did so that I would be emmbaraced Into doing what he wants). My dad keeps bring up how he would put his toung in our mouths as baby’s (like the fucking 60 year old creep he is) My dad once stalked my mom and then in the middle of the night told me to go with him, in the car he then told me how my mom is a prostitut and how she is fucking the principal, thing is that she isn’t doing any of that and is actually a teacher at my last school but he just wouldn’t believe me. I once was hatted on by a friend so much that I started believing it and actually fell in love with her and obsessed over her (abuse fucks up the brain). I was getting lectured by my dad about spelling (something that happened evey time he saw me), started crying and my mom came in to defend me, long story short the police where called because he threatened to cut up my mom, he then came back a few days later to pickup his stuff and he said to me before leaving that I was the reason this all happened (out of all 3 of my other siblings I had to be the reason). We didn’t hear from his for two years after that but I did, i fucking hallucinated that bitches voice, I heard his footsteps and I heard him enter the house but when I asked around turns out that not a person moved in the time that I swear I heard him. I got into a fight with my mom a year ago about the laundry and then I went into the room and closed the door, i guess wanting privacy is grounds for taking my phone away, she wrestled with me to get it but then got tired and called my siblings on me, my sis held me down and my bro took the phone (tho I did some sick moves like pinning the phone to the ground with my toes cuz my hands were being held behind my back), latter I was trying to go to sleep but she threw my blanket and pillow out the room and had my bro block the door with her, I stayed awake crying and trying to open the door until I tired myself out. She also told me how I deserve to be hit and fucking bumped me into the wall so I can’t enter the room. My dad keeps telling us how we are depressed and need help (he’s been saying this from a time before I knew what it meant) but then he goes on to tell me how he cry’s himself to sleep thing of me and that he is suicidal, at this point I’m not sure I would care if he ended it. I think this might actually be better if he did. Just this year my brother told my dad how he’s turning 10 and my dad said how “when they turn 10 you have to start hitting them” and how it’s in our religion. I was latter in the car with my dad and told him to not talk to my lil bro that way and that then became a fight, I left the car saying how I will never talk to him again, then blocked him and haven’t talked in months. A few weeks ago I had a fight with my mom about how I want lip piercings and she started crying (I did say hurtful things like how I will runaway and get them behind her back) she then took away my phone when I went to the bathroom to cry and started ignoring me, my brothers both hit me and called me many names and made very rude comments on me, when I told my mom about them hitting me she ignored me, she took all electronic because they are “her property” and that if I don’t need her then I don’t need anything she provides. She took my only connection to friends. The worst part is that she didn’t even my the electrics for me but my dad did (they are divorced), I went to sleep crying and then somehow played fanf on the tv without her stoping me and ripping the controller out of my hands, I then went up to her crying saying I don’t want to fight anymore (the ignoring really got to me, I hated it because she’s living her life and being on her phone while I had nothing to do but cry myself to sleep or lock myself in the bathroom to cry some more), she told me that a child like me deserves to be hit (not her first time saying it but still hurts like it did the first time she said it), she also knows that I have thoughts of self harm but I guess she forgot or something (although they aren’t only thoughts now), she only talked to me to fight, she kept saying that she should leave me with my dad and go back to her parents and that it isn’t her job to provide food and shelter (she is my legal guardian), she said some real dumb shit and I am a person who hates agreeing when I don’t and I hate apologizing when I don’t feel in the wrong but I did both just so we can go back to the happy family we were only 3 days earlier, she didn’t accept my apology. She didn’t want to solve what has been making her child cry for hours about, the child who at this point eyes have gone dry and are taking deep scary inhales in between words. I begged her to forgive me, she said that the only way to forgive me is that if I pray. I cried through the fight, I cried while praying and I cried trying to fall asleep but my jaw hurt to much from all the fucking stress she caused me. My sister has been talking to a therapist for a few years now and I just hate how my mom thinks she’s the only one that needs a therapist, even after she was told of my sh thoughts. She even got my brother some therapy which I hate because I was picked on more by my dad then him. He literally defended the old man once. I just hate being sad rn, I hate it because everything’s been great these past weeks, too good. I just know my next low is around the corner, I want to enjoy life but ever time I do I just hit another low. At this point I sh for the fun of it, I never really had a reason to but I guess I just never stopped (I don’t really plan on stopping either), the worst part of it tho is looking back at my younger self and see that all the hitting, pinching and scratching I was doing to myself was self harm, I was only 7, I was to younge to do that to myself but I still do it to this day, habits never die I guess. I’m also not suicidal at the moment but who knows what will happen tomorrow (as I said I do go from being the happiest I’ve been to wanting to never wake). The thing that makes it all worse is religion, Im bisexual and in my religion if I date then I should be killed. I talked about how some ex friends who are also Muslim wished death on a gay guy and how their moms laughed with them and my mom just agreed with them. I tryed telling her that who are we do decide who dies and who goes to heaven but she didn’t like the way I was thinking. I just don’t want this religion anymore. I just want to kiss who I want to kiss without fear of hell. I was talking to my mom about a Muslim girl who doesn’t wear the hijab and my mom said how she wouldn’t let her daughter leave the house like that. It’s just so suffocating thinking that my mom won’t let me take the hijab off if I wanted to. Islam is such a beautiful religion but it’s not for me anymore. There is sooooo much more I want to write about but I’m going to just stop here
@@SleepyShadett I pray that you heal... Oh Father God, please shower them in your love and prosperity, father, God protect them with all means they welcome you in their home protect them father God cover them in your blood to the top of their head to the bottoms of their feet. I pray that they heal from the trauma and suffering they have experienced, I pray that they get better and have an amazing life in Jesus name I pray Amen.... You are loved
I listen to sad song to know I'm not alone I love anime ...my family,, ewww your gross ...me,, oh ok I tell my friends .... My friend fuck them I'm here with you ..... Me 😊😊😊
Title: NO RANDOM MUSIC!!!
Video: *random music*
ther was random music
ikr like please stopppp with the music
@@Astorvents i was about to argue with yall before i realized its like over 10 videos ;-;
@@JustCat_432 lol yea 😭
*there
its not that serious🤷♂
To the people that have the parents that get mad after you say you’re not hungry, when you sleep all day, like they can see that you’re struggling and they just get mad at you and call you “lazy” when it so much to get out of bed, so if you woke up, if you got up today, I am so proud of you. If you ate to day, I’m proud, I’m so proud of you!
They don’t have to proud.. but just remember that someone out there is, I am proud of you, all of you..
“You are enough just as you are” -Meghan Markle
YALL. THE RANDOM MUSIC IS OUT OF THEIR CONTROL. TIKTOK REPLACES AUDIOS SOMETIMES IF THE CREATOR OF THE AUDIO WANTS IT REMOVED.
How's everyone doing today??
Vent here if needed
@@HarlequinS1mp How are you doing? What's going on with you, you can vent to me I will try my best to help you ❤️
I have a lot to vent about so buckle up! I used to wish that I would die when I was about 8 so then I would get into heaven (I was told that if a person dies before they mature then they enter heaven). When I was around 9 years old My dad told all my teachers at the parent teacher conference that I haven’t changed my clothing for a week (a thing he did so that I would be emmbaraced Into doing what he wants). My dad keeps bring up how he would put his toung in our mouths as baby’s (like the fucking 60 year old creep he is) My dad once stalked my mom and then in the middle of the night told me to go with him, in the car he then told me how my mom is a prostitut and how she is fucking the principal, thing is that she isn’t doing any of that and is actually a teacher at my last school but he just wouldn’t believe me. I once was hatted on by a friend so much that I started believing it and actually fell in love with her and obsessed over her (abuse fucks up the brain). I was getting lectured by my dad about spelling (something that happened evey time he saw me), started crying and my mom came in to defend me, long story short the police where called because he threatened to cut up my mom, he then came back a few days later to pickup his stuff and he said to me before leaving that I was the reason this all happened (out of all 3 of my other siblings I had to be the reason). We didn’t hear from his for two years after that but I did, i fucking hallucinated that bitches voice, I heard his footsteps and I heard him enter the house but when I asked around turns out that not a person moved in the time that I swear I heard him. I got into a fight with my mom a year ago about the laundry and then I went into the room and closed the door, i guess wanting privacy is grounds for taking my phone away, she wrestled with me to get it but then got tired and called my siblings on me, my sis held me down and my bro took the phone (tho I did some sick moves like pinning the phone to the ground with my toes cuz my hands were being held behind my back), latter I was trying to go to sleep but she threw my blanket and pillow out the room and had my bro block the door with her, I stayed awake crying and trying to open the door until I tired myself out. She also told me how I deserve to be hit and fucking bumped me into the wall so I can’t enter the room. My dad keeps telling us how we are depressed and need help (he’s been saying this from a time before I knew what it meant) but then he goes on to tell me how he cry’s himself to sleep thing of me and that he is suicidal, at this point I’m not sure I would care if he ended it. I think this might actually be better if he did. Just this year my brother told my dad how he’s turning 10 and my dad said how “when they turn 10 you have to start hitting them” and how it’s in our religion. I was latter in the car with my dad and told him to not talk to my lil bro that way and that then became a fight, I left the car saying how I will never talk to him again, then blocked him and haven’t talked in months. A few weeks ago I had a fight with my mom about how I want lip piercings and she started crying (I did say hurtful things like how I will runaway and get them behind her back) she then took away my phone when I went to the bathroom to cry and started ignoring me, my brothers both hit me and called me many names and made very rude comments on me, when I told my mom about them hitting me she ignored me, she took all electronic because they are “her property” and that if I don’t need her then I don’t need anything she provides. She took my only connection to friends. The worst part is that she didn’t even my the electrics for me but my dad did (they are divorced), I went to sleep crying and then somehow played fanf on the tv without her stoping me and ripping the controller out of my hands, I then went up to her crying saying I don’t want to fight anymore (the ignoring really got to me, I hated it because she’s living her life and being on her phone while I had nothing to do but cry myself to sleep or lock myself in the bathroom to cry some more), she told me that a child like me deserves to be hit (not her first time saying it but still hurts like it did the first time she said it), she also knows that I have thoughts of self harm but I guess she forgot or something (although they aren’t only thoughts now), she only talked to me to fight, she kept saying that she should leave me with my dad and go back to her parents and that it isn’t her job to provide food and shelter (she is my legal guardian), she said some real dumb shit and I am a person who hates agreeing when I don’t and I hate apologizing when I don’t feel in the wrong but I did both just so we can go back to the happy family we were only 3 days earlier, she didn’t accept my apology. She didn’t want to solve what has been making her child cry for hours about, the child who at this point eyes have gone dry and are taking deep scary inhales in between words. I begged her to forgive me, she said that the only way to forgive me is that if I pray. I cried through the fight, I cried while praying and I cried trying to fall asleep but my jaw hurt to much from all the fucking stress she caused me. My sister has been talking to a therapist for a few years now and I just hate how my mom thinks she’s the only one that needs a therapist, even after she was told of my sh thoughts. She even got my brother some therapy which I hate because I was picked on more by my dad then him. He literally defended the old man once. I just hate being sad rn, I hate it because everything’s been great these past weeks, too good. I just know my next low is around the corner, I want to enjoy life but ever time I do I just hit another low. At this point I sh for the fun of it, I never really had a reason to but I guess I just never stopped (I don’t really plan on stopping either), the worst part of it tho is looking back at my younger self and see that all the hitting, pinching and scratching I was doing to myself was self harm, I was only 7, I was to younge to do that to myself but I still do it to this day, habits never die I guess. I’m also not suicidal at the moment but who knows what will happen tomorrow (as I said I do go from being the happiest I’ve been to wanting to never wake). The thing that makes it all worse is religion, Im bisexual and in my religion if I date then I should be killed. I talked about how some ex friends who are also Muslim wished death on a gay guy and how their moms laughed with them and my mom just agreed with them. I tryed telling her that who are we do decide who dies and who goes to heaven but she didn’t like the way I was thinking. I just don’t want this religion anymore. I just want to kiss who I want to kiss without fear of hell. I was talking to my mom about a Muslim girl who doesn’t wear the hijab and my mom said how she wouldn’t let her daughter leave the house like that. It’s just so suffocating thinking that my mom won’t let me take the hijab off if I wanted to. Islam is such a beautiful religion but it’s not for me anymore. There is sooooo much more I want to write about but I’m going to just stop here
My dog had to be put down, he had cancer and we couldn’t afford to pay for it. It was also causing him pain, so we couldn’t let him live like that. He was the sweetest(and stinkiest) dog ever.
I know it must be really really hard for you, you're so strong for staying with him throughout the time he was sick , I can tell you really loved him and im positive he had a happy life being taken care of you
THE RANDOM BSD TIKTOKS????
Thank you, Cattik tok!
I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!! I'm standing up to my dad !!!!
I did to now I'm in the hospital have a lawsuit over my dad being abusive
Plot twist: there was random music
Honestly at this point I’ve just accepted taht I will forever be a danger to myself and no one’s gonna bother to help me
I asked our mom if we could be voluntarily checked into a psych ward recently cus I genuinely feel like a danger to myself and the rest of my system and she said no, it really upset my friend who suggested it and at this point I honestly don’t care, I knew how it would go from the start but still tried anyways
At least she can’t say I didn’t tell her so if things ever get super bad!
im sorry, but there is very much a lot of random music TwT
It's a vent tiktok playlist when they said no random music bc usually they put music over the tiktoks to lighten up the mood
I'm sorry if I didn't explain well T^T
@@Vel_duckling I actually think it’s for copy righted songs that they have to cover. they out in those silly videos to lighten the mood
@@Gazer_show111 oh ok I didn't rlly know or give attention,so I just thought it was to lighten the mood but ty for letting me know ^^
@@Vel_duckling oh it’s alright!
10:30 - 16:33 Random music.
If anyone wants to vent,I'm here
I have a friend who constantly and knowingly misgenders me and uses wrong pronouns, I can't just leave them alone because no one else likes them because they lie and seek attention due to a bad life at home. I wish anyone else would hang out with them, they don't deserve to be completely alone. Why does it have to be me? The one person they're capable of hurting this way?
@@DuftledSploop I'm so sorry, does your friend use your pronouns as a joke? Do they make fun of you for it?
I want to tell my siblings the truth. But every time I say what I like, that just gives them one more thing to make fun of. To the point where I can't tell them anything cause they all make fun of groups that are already having too much hate like the LGBT community and the therian community or the scene people. It's sad to the point where I have to act like I dislike them too or I haven't heard of that group and I hate it
@@mc_and_gc_Aus I'm so sorry, I actually deal with this myself, more on the school side. I know how hard it is to be accepted but that is WHO YOU ARE and if your siblings/family have a problem with that, they can deal with it. It is who you are and no one should make fun of who/what you are. May I ask, what are your pronouns?
I have a lot to vent about so buckle up! I used to wish that I would die when I was about 8 so then I would get into heaven (I was told that if a person dies before they mature then they enter heaven). When I was around 9 years old My dad told all my teachers at the parent teacher conference that I haven’t changed my clothing for a week (a thing he did so that I would be emmbaraced Into doing what he wants). My dad keeps bring up how he would put his toung in our mouths as baby’s (like the fucking 60 year old creep he is) My dad once stalked my mom and then in the middle of the night told me to go with him, in the car he then told me how my mom is a prostitut and how she is fucking the principal, thing is that she isn’t doing any of that and is actually a teacher at my last school but he just wouldn’t believe me. I once was hatted on by a friend so much that I started believing it and actually fell in love with her and obsessed over her (abuse fucks up the brain). I was getting lectured by my dad about spelling (something that happened evey time he saw me), started crying and my mom came in to defend me, long story short the police where called because he threatened to cut up my mom, he then came back a few days later to pickup his stuff and he said to me before leaving that I was the reason this all happened (out of all 3 of my other siblings I had to be the reason). We didn’t hear from his for two years after that but I did, i fucking hallucinated that bitches voice, I heard his footsteps and I heard him enter the house but when I asked around turns out that not a person moved in the time that I swear I heard him. I got into a fight with my mom a year ago about the laundry and then I went into the room and closed the door, i guess wanting privacy is grounds for taking my phone away, she wrestled with me to get it but then got tired and called my siblings on me, my sis held me down and my bro took the phone (tho I did some sick moves like pinning the phone to the ground with my toes cuz my hands were being held behind my back), latter I was trying to go to sleep but she threw my blanket and pillow out the room and had my bro block the door with her, I stayed awake crying and trying to open the door until I tired myself out. She also told me how I deserve to be hit and fucking bumped me into the wall so I can’t enter the room. My dad keeps telling us how we are depressed and need help (he’s been saying this from a time before I knew what it meant) but then he goes on to tell me how he cry’s himself to sleep thing of me and that he is suicidal, at this point I’m not sure I would care if he ended it. I think this might actually be better if he did. Just this year my brother told my dad how he’s turning 10 and my dad said how “when they turn 10 you have to start hitting them” and how it’s in our religion. I was latter in the car with my dad and told him to not talk to my lil bro that way and that then became a fight, I left the car saying how I will never talk to him again, then blocked him and haven’t talked in months. A few weeks ago I had a fight with my mom about how I want lip piercings and she started crying (I did say hurtful things like how I will runaway and get them behind her back) she then took away my phone when I went to the bathroom to cry and started ignoring me, my brothers both hit me and called me many names and made very rude comments on me, when I told my mom about them hitting me she ignored me, she took all electronic because they are “her property” and that if I don’t need her then I don’t need anything she provides. She took my only connection to friends. The worst part is that she didn’t even my the electrics for me but my dad did (they are divorced), I went to sleep crying and then somehow played fanf on the tv without her stoping me and ripping the controller out of my hands, I then went up to her crying saying I don’t want to fight anymore (the ignoring really got to me, I hated it because she’s living her life and being on her phone while I had nothing to do but cry myself to sleep or lock myself in the bathroom to cry some more), she told me that a child like me deserves to be hit (not her first time saying it but still hurts like it did the first time she said it), she also knows that I have thoughts of self harm but I guess she forgot or something (although they aren’t only thoughts now), she only talked to me to fight, she kept saying that she should leave me with my dad and go back to her parents and that it isn’t her job to provide food and shelter (she is my legal guardian), she said some real dumb shit and I am a person who hates agreeing when I don’t and I hate apologizing when I don’t feel in the wrong but I did both just so we can go back to the happy family we were only 3 days earlier, she didn’t accept my apology. She didn’t want to solve what has been making her child cry for hours about, the child who at this point eyes have gone dry and are taking deep scary inhales in between words. I begged her to forgive me, she said that the only way to forgive me is that if I pray. I cried through the fight, I cried while praying and I cried trying to fall asleep but my jaw hurt to much from all the fucking stress she caused me. My sister has been talking to a therapist for a few years now and I just hate how my mom thinks she’s the only one that needs a therapist, even after she was told of my sh thoughts. She even got my brother some therapy which I hate because I was picked on more by my dad then him. He literally defended the old man once. I just hate being sad rn, I hate it because everything’s been great these past weeks, too good. I just know my next low is around the corner, I want to enjoy life but ever time I do I just hit another low. At this point I sh for the fun of it, I never really had a reason to but I guess I just never stopped (I don’t really plan on stopping either), the worst part of it tho is looking back at my younger self and see that all the hitting, pinching and scratching I was doing to myself was self harm, I was only 7, I was to younge to do that to myself but I still do it to this day, habits never die I guess. I’m also not suicidal at the moment but who knows what will happen tomorrow (as I said I do go from being the happiest I’ve been to wanting to never wake). The thing that makes it all worse is religion, Im bisexual and in my religion if I date then I should be killed. I talked about how some ex friends who are also Muslim wished death on a gay guy and how their moms laughed with them and my mom just agreed with them. I tryed telling her that who are we do decide who dies and who goes to heaven but she didn’t like the way I was thinking. I just don’t want this religion anymore. I just want to kiss who I want to kiss without fear of hell. I was talking to my mom about a Muslim girl who doesn’t wear the hijab and my mom said how she wouldn’t let her daughter leave the house like that. It’s just so suffocating thinking that my mom won’t let me take the hijab off if I wanted to. Islam is such a beautiful religion but it’s not for me anymore. There is sooooo much more I want to write about but I’m going to just stop here
Has anyone stopped to wonder how the person making this is feeling? Idk I feel like he’s going thru an awful lot of shi :(
My friends are the only ones that care about me😢😢😢😢😢
i am getting on my last nerve with this. if there will be random music, just fvcking say it.
had to talk to a social worker the other day. it’s that bad 🙃.
I hate it I hate it I hate it and myself too. I hate it all .
@@SleepyShadett I pray that you heal... Oh Father God, please shower them in your love and prosperity, father, God protect them with all means they welcome you in their home protect them father God cover them in your blood to the top of their head to the bottoms of their feet. I pray that they heal from the trauma and suffering they have experienced, I pray that they get better and have an amazing life in Jesus name I pray Amen.... You are loved
Song? 8:13
I have way to much depression 😢😢😢😢 can't get out of it ......me I want to draw,,, my dad no softball no time for drawing ,,,me,, oh ok😢😢😢😢
I listen to sad song to know I'm not alone
I love anime ...my family,, ewww your gross ...me,, oh ok I tell my friends .... My friend fuck them I'm here with you ..... Me 😊😊😊