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I’ve never really had my very own space in my house. About six months ago, my husband and I decided to get a “sleep divorce”. I took over the tiniest room in our house, splurged on a new bed/mattress with my side hustle money, and created a reading/meditation nook. My new space brings me so much joy (and everyone’s sleep is so much better)! The only problem: I never want to leave my room!
We started sleeping in different rooms years ago because I was a night shift worker and a very light sleeper. Husband jitterbugs and snores loudly. We both enjoy playing together and then going to our own beds to stretch out and flop around to our heart’s content.
I accidentally hit the dislike button, sorry! Yes, my husband and I have radically different sleep schedules. We get in together time and then go our separate ways! @anneteselent
Here's a sobering thought. I worked my career as a paramedic, I loved every second, it never effected me and I was just born to do that. The job that really sticks at the back of my mind was going to a 60 year old chap, the day after he retired from a life in a factory, his wife and him had their retirement all planned out. She was telling us all these amazing plans as we tried to resus him..... all that time waiting and for what? It really hit home. So, 2 years ago I was finally pushed out of my beloved career and now I live, travel and truly LIVE my life from my van. Every day I wake to new experiences, joy, hope. And your channel has helped me start this wonderful new adventure on RUclips, Thanks Soooooo much. :) And finally. Woo Hoo CONGRATS on the 100th upload. (ps, Dec 22nd I upload my 2000th!!! Podcast for meditation) . Stay awesome and keep inspiring us silver (and bald) solo's.
Paramedics are amazing! I was helped by some paramedics recently. Much respect to you for doing that career which must have been very challenging at times and I totally understand your decision to make the most out of your later years.
There is no need to defer joy. Everyday that we wake up is a gift and the last segment of journey to retirement is joyful. Taking joy in the small pleasures in life - watching nature, having a good cup of coffee, and hearing a favorite song are all small sources of joy that can be appreciated on a daily basis.
Serendiptiously, I very recently watched a Tiny House video where the person said, "Don't someday your life away". There's a lesson in that, one that's being repeated. I rewatched Mamma Mia! and the big takehome for me was to let go and revel in the joy of living. I've spent nearly all of my life planning and striving first to survive and then to succeed. So now I'm wearing my good clothes, spraying on my good perfume, using the good dishes...
Sky is a beauty. I'm turning 70, solo, waiting on $ and I plan to move then. I wanted to get a companion/ESA dog but wanted to wait until I moved. I was also willing to have it happen if the circumstances appeared right. My friend runs an animal rescue. I saw a post for a small chihuahua and said I would take him if pet parent was not found. No adoption cuz parent was found. She had another small dog. He was a poodle/chi mix, a bit bigger than I thought I wanted, but the right age, color, perhaps a bit too energetic. In 3 months, this dog has changed my life.
My brothrr who lived alone next door was diagnosef with incurable cancer just as I was teturning ti health and a fuller life after my surgery the year before. I had to defet travel plans and freedoms I had been looking forward to in order to help. He died over a month ago now and frankly I feel too tired to do much of anything big now. But I'm.enjoyimg the rest and the peace and knowing I gave all I had. And I'm making plans for simple joys daily. And reconnecting with old friends.❤
Three months ago I left my husband of 46 years. I had been wanting to do it for a couple of years. I sold my shares of our home to my step son ( my husband’s youngest) and bought a small townhouse for myself. Moved in on the Monday and Tuesday morning I had a stroke. Of course it was a bolt out of the blue. Looking back I see how the sale and purchase transactions were super stressful, (not the marriage breakup). Lucky for me it was a small stroke but a warning sign, my blood pressure was super high. I love living on my own, love my little townhouse and consider myself very lucky. I have just celebrated my 75th birthday two days ago. Should have done this years ago but I am looking forward to many happy and healthy years with my daughters and grandchildren close by. Thank you for your u tube channel , I really enjoy it.
For all of us who made that mistake we realized we didn't have the energy to do the things we were planning on. Life happens so enjoy your life don't overdo because you have to live in your spacesuit no matter how old it is.🎉
I'm retired (3 years now) and I find myself wondering just what I was SO looking forward to - other than not having to get up at 4:30 in the morning! I'm working on enjoying a simpler, slower pace of life. I'm trying to embrace 'do it now' for things I've always wanted to do. Not so easy. I enjoy your viewpoints and 'face to face' chats with your camera! I can't imagine it being easy to maintain 'eye contact' with a lens - but it works for your viewers! I'm also an introvert and my social contacts have dwindled considerably since retirement - thanks for your video about this - I feel less 'odd' knowing that preferring my own company to the stresses of mixing with others is my 'normal'! I can't think of any questions for you at the moment - but I look forward to hearing what others ask and your answers!
CONGRATULATIONS on 100 videos! I have watched many of them. I have found that happiness is not the destination but learning to enjoy the journey. Strangely enough, I learned this from my son. I am now retired and have time to do everything I once said would make me happy. However, at 70, I have found that I have time but am short on energy. I spend some time each week with my granddaughter after school. It is amazing how spending time with this little one gives me energy, and I appreciate every minute she is here with me. I also find that with my new channel, I am much more focused on seeing the positive things I can write about in life. I have lived a full and busy life and have many times deferred my happiness. But today is my day, and I have found happiness in sharing some of those stories and helping others. I am not as good as you in my storytelling, but I am not done yet; I am still a work-in-progress.
I recently came across a long list of places I wanted to travel to, written in my 20’s. 45 years later, I went to exactly none of these places. Too busy with day to day life, kids, career that ate up way too much of me. Now I don’t even feel like traveling. So yes, do what you can when you can, as life changes you in ways you don’t expect.
I believe it so much Jen! Once I hit my 70’s they’re going faster than the 60’s. So I’m traveling more and I’m now even looking to find an apartment in Netherlands to spend a few months! I am not deferring, any longer, the desire to spend more time with a daughter and her family that live there. Let’s all take to heart this way of thinking and go out and do whatever you need to do- life is waiting to see you- where???
Congrats on the 100th Video! I think this was actually one of my favorite videos you've done. Plenty of deferred joy we've seen in our lives, and trying to teach that message to our kids... "don't wait for graduating...." "don't want until you get your license.... " "don't wait until you have a 'real job'" etc. Was very timely message for us, certainly!
Tomorrow is not promised! I have had breast cancer and lymph node cancer. There is NO deferring happiness. I am going for it, no waiting. I started my new channel and it is a daily reminder to be kind, be the best version of myself, stop waiting, be happy and embrace every moment good and bad. congrats on the 100 episode xoxo thanks Jen
Jen, in honor of your 100th video I am subscribing ! Not going to defer my happiness today. Thanks for sharing your humor, candor, and knowledge . Congratulations on your milestone. Merry Christmas. 🎄
I had a countdown timer for my retirement. It dragged on forever until the day finally came. And that first summer off (first summer off since age16) two really bad things happened that impacted my life. So, the lesson is there, enjoy while you can.
I have had a countdown timer to my retirement for 2 years. It brings me joy to look at it. I looked at it every once in a while 2 years ago, monthly a year ago, and now I look at it every day and smile. 5 months 0 weeks and 5 days to go! I am 70. Also, I have always kept a journal and recorded what I did that day. It’s something I highly recommend, like Jen.
I just love your video's, you are so encouraging. I had a count down clock also, and I can't believe it's been 10 years this year that I retired. If you think the time is slow to retirement, wait until it comes and see how fast it goes by. It doesn't take much to make me happy. Happy in my sewing room making a quilt or embroidering, happy with friends playing Bridge or Mahjongg, happy seeing the deer tracks out in the snow in the morning. Happy Holidays to you. Best Wishes.
CONGRATS ON YOUR 100TH VIDEO! I am really happy to have "stumbled upon" your channel this year! Oh, my God! What a deep topic, Jen, you are discussing! How we feel at the present moment is extremely important not only because it will never come back, but because it has an enormous impact on our future, the greatest part of which is our HEALTH. Joy as well as gratitude and satisfaction, are at the root of it. Why does this understanding often come late? This concept should be taught at school since it paves your life. Very lucky are those whose parents could teach that attitude to them…I was not among those people. Up until my 58, I earned one certificate or a diploma after another in order to build my career (for which, I assume, I was born and which I loved). At 64, I still did not have a job that would allow me to retire with a decent pension, so my plan was to continue working well after retirement age. Never did it happen… because of an illness…I was not angry, did not blame anyone, just surrendered to the fact and did everything I could like “A Frog in a Milk Pail”. Now, I know the value of joy, satisfaction and gratitude much-much better. I wish I could write in a diary, like you, Jen. What I did once was, on recommendation by deeply respected Louise Hay, making a list of 40 items, for which I was/am grateful. Other than that, when I go to bed and when I wake up, I silently express my sincere gratitude, which inevitably leads to joy, for my life and everything in it. The one and only plan I have now is to make every moment of my life joyful and calm.
Such a good subject - after I left the work world at age 62 (7 yrs ago) and allowed some adjustment time - I suddenly GOT what you’re saying. Even down to the small things like knitting something with the “good” yarn I’ve been saving, and then of course the big things like solo travel somewhere far away. Studying stoic philosophy has helped me with this - the realization that I could be dead tomorrow. I enjoy your channel!
How long did it take you to adjust in retirement? I can retire any time now and I'm finding it difficult to pick a date because ... once I retire, I can't go back and I really love my job and the people I work with but .. I've been here over 34 years!
@@ArdawnaI put a lot of thought into how I’d spend my time before I ever left my job. I took as much vacation time as I could the last few years I worked so I could “practice” being unemployed, developed hobbies, as well as volunteer interests. Once I left work it probably took 6 months to a year to structure my time the way I wanted. Keep in mind that most people retire when they’re forced to either because they’re pushed out of their job by the employer or their health makes it such that they can no longer work. Knowing that helped decide to be proactive in planning my future.
I wish these lessons could be taught in highschool. My kids go to a particularly competitive school and are constantly judged and compared to peers. Their value, self worth measured by constantly attaining …fill in the blank. If only young people could have discussions, lectures around being content here and now and not putting off self respect until perfection is achieved..maybe mental health wouldn’t be so vague. Lovely messages in this video. Always enjoy watching you.
@@MGE9436 I couldn't agree more. I'm not trying to be unkind, but why not have the discussions and lectures around being content, with your children right now? You've learned a huge life lesson, share it with your children.
That's very true about not deferring happiness and also appreciating what we have already. I'm only 41 but I have recently had two health problems back to back. At one point I wasn't sure that I'd survive and I definitely felt regret for procrasinating and not having done certain things. And also, although I always appreciated my good health, I felt like I could have done more with it because having a physically healthy body with energy Is one of the biggest blessings in life. I'm still recovering but I'm doing much better now so I feel like I've been given another chance to keep going. I've been reflecting on everything and reviewing my life so that I can go forward focusing on and doing what matters and not not wasting my time because none of us know how long we have.
Great topic, Jen! An extension to this , and what I aspire to is the quote from a songwriter named Nightbirde ( Jane), she passed away from cancer at a young age but right to the end, she found some form of joy in each day and even brought herself to win the gold on an American Talent show all while undergoing chemo. Her quote was this: “You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore before you decide to be happy” . Boy, Isn’t that the truth though….happiness/ joy really is a decision. I love your channel, and look forward to seeing you in January. Merry Christmas! 🎄
I remember seeing Nightbird. She was amazing. I am sorry that she lost her battle. She was so filled with joy. She probably experienced more in her all-too-short life than most people much older. A beautiful soul.
Congratulations on your 100th episode, Jen!I enjoy your calming, thought-provoking, and informative videos very much. Cheers to you and best wishes for 100 more videos to share!
Jen, Congratulations on 100 Videos. We are the same age and you share EXCELLENT advice…Years before my husband was diagnosed with cancer at age 53 we would randomly take “long weekend trips” a few times a year! Had we waited for retirement, that “someday” would have never happened. September 2021 at age 55 he went to his heavenly home. I’m so grateful for the love we shared & and the great memories we made along the way. I continue to live a grateful life and continue making memories with my adult children, grandchild, family, and friends! I actually “ice skated” (most of it holding the rail😂) this weekend and had a fun time skating with my 24 year old daughter.
Congrats on video 100. Whooooo-hooo! Deferred joy? When we were younger I think we felt like we had to "pay our dues." Like we didn't deserve it quite yet. But there's never really a day when - okay, now is the perfect time. Such a lovely message. Thank you.
Congratulations on your 100th! What is joyful? Who knows, I'm 72, female, have part time work, each day an adventure. Doing well financially overall. You're headed towards 100k subscribers, too!
There are 7 days in a week. Someday, isn't one of them... TP under, awesome. My retirement date is still quite fluid, since I still see it 5 years out. But. I'm planning as if I might retire sooner... Never know. Happiness begins the moment you choose to be happy. I know some channels are saying "it's over", but I don't agree. I have the rest of my life ahead of me!!! Tomorrow is never guaranteed. I don't agree with YOLO, because, you LIVE everyday. You Only Die Once... Be well. Be kind, Be happy!!!
Great video and really resonated with me about taking control of my own happiness and living in the moment rather than waiting for it to happen or for someone else to provide it
Congrats on your 100th episode. I really enjoy your videos. I have two questions. 1. I saw that someone else asked you how old you will be when you retire. I am curious what month you chose and why. 2. Have you ever been on a train trip? I am flying from the Island to Halifax and taking the train back for my 65th birthday. You have made me want a countdown clock till my retirement, but I don't really want to retire, I love my job so much.
100 videos...well done Jen. Congratulations 🥂🥂. I always worried I “didn’t have enough”..$s, time, stuff. Then I got cancer....the gift of remission 8 years later is looking back on 8 years of truly valuing every moment/day/...I’m not perfect but when I start to get in the dumps I switch on that gratitude switch and change my mood. I feel soooo blessed to have those extra years cancer free...I’ve been able to have fun and know my grandchildren, speak my wisdom to my family, be generous, say “yes” to life. It’s easy to get bitter and ask “why me”. But if you are blessed to wake up for another morning in good health, seize the moment, watch the day unfurl, smell the rose you just picked, hug and kiss your loved ones, smile, be cheerful, be involved...but mostly,..be so very grateful for another precious day. Wishing you every happiness at Christmas and may 2025 bring you hope and good health. Oh! And always say “thank you” for every kindness shown to you. Sending blessings to you.
You are right, we do not have to limit ourselves--why postpone happiness (or being content) when it is possible to be happy now as well as down the road? In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius wrote, “This is the mark of perfection of character--to spend each day as if it were your last, without frenzy, laziness, or any pretending.” And thank you for the heads up on the mattress--waking feeling rested is fundamental.
Wow! Congrats on your 100th video! 🥳😁👍 Great topic today. Like most people early in my life I had what I called Someday Syndrome. But, apparently life had other plans for my life. Hit some hard bumps along the way so I had to redraw plans with each one. So, when I was eventually forced into early retirement that didn't look anything like I had planned. As a matter of fact, very little of my life worked out according to plan. And, yes, there was some depression along the way. One day I heard someone sharing in a group setting about focussing on the small, simple things in her day made her more aware of herself and others in the moment and eventually her depression lifted. She ended by saying something along the lines of pay attention to today and you'll see reasons for positivity and live today to the fullest with what you have and where you are and give what you can. So, when I lay my head on my pillow at night, my heart is at peace and I smile. So, I gave it a shot. It took some practice because I wasn't used to focussing on the positive and living in the moment. But, it paid off. And she was right. 🙂 Already looking forward to our next chat. Have a great week and Happy Holidays! --Paula in Ohio USA 🙋
Thank you, Jen for this great video and congratulations on your 100th episode. I believe that today is always the present and you have to live for now not the future you can plan, but after a few health scares reality comes to mind and you need to enjoy yourself so when I can, I enjoy buying things for myself and living the life I need to live. Thank you so much. Looking forward to your Q&A in the new year.
When tomorrow gets here it's today and it's now. Might as well enjoy now😊 ... things have always worked out so far and I at some point decided to trust that they always will. Helps me live my life with more ease. You make excellent points 😊
Congratulations! Thank you for this video, i am planning a no-spend year next year 2025..and putting off on a planned dream vacation,...I think I can do both...but afraid to..when you get in your 60s you really can no longer waste your time or lose your dreams....i really don't have enough to retire...working harder doesn't seem to be the Answer...but working smarter is...very encouraging video.
Congratulations on 100 videos 🎉🎉🎉🎉 I also see that you are over 90k subscribers. 🎉🎉🎉🎉 I just want you to know that you have been a great Inspiration for me to keep going
Jen, I try to appreciate each day and I find joy in the simple pleasures. Thanks for inspiring us. I enjoyed your ad. You are a natural! Joyeux Noël! 🎄
Despite being one of those crazy “tp under” people I really enjoy the wisdom you share on this channel. I‘ll be starting my last year of work January 1, I’m one of those people who can’t afford to retire in a year but I’m going to do it anyway. My job is busy and stressful with endless irritations. If I don’t retire sooner than later I’m afraid it’s going to kill me. I’d rather have a quiet retirement at home than drop dead from stress 5 years from now trying to save up enough to retire so we can……..?
Very true, Jen! Happy Holidays! I'm loving my christmas tree this year, switching to soft cream, gold and pink decorations and soft, white lights. Enjoy that mattress! I'm celebrating my 71st birthday in Arizona this January. Carpe Diem! 👍😎🇨🇦
Massive congratulations, Jen!!! I've been with you since 13 or 14,000 subscribers and I love your channel. I too am silver and solo (I'm growing out the hair dye and going back to my natural colour (grey) for the first time in 25 years) and I also have the retirement countdown clock on my phone. One countdown for my desired retirement age of 60 and one for the state retirement age of 67. I was really interested to see this video title. We've had it drilled into us over the last couple of decades that delayed gratification is better for us. That it makes us healthier and more successful etc. The Marshmallow Test way became the **only** successful way to live, or so we were told. You're so right, though. What about the unhappier times of zero gratification and denial that we have to go through to reach **the day** of gratification? What if we then find that, after years of denial scrimping and saving, we're no happier? What if we could have been content for those intervening 20 years instead, but we intentionally missed out on that joy?
Oh Jen, how I relate to this video. I used to defer happiness. I used to “wait until…” Now, I GO FOR IT! I’m turning 62 in January and I’ve made many strides and hit some good goals in the last 4 years. I’ve also made a few bad decisions. However in general, I’m pretty happy with my life lately. Thanks for your videos. I look forward to them every week.
Wait until - those words are so true! I am 69 and decided to do 70 things I've never done before by the time I turn 70. Been 69 a whole month :-). The 1st few I've never done before are easy lol.
Congrats on your 100th video, Jen! What advice would you give a person in their 30s? Also who is your favourite character from the Game of Thrones books/A Song of Fire and Ice?
Congrats on 100 videos! 🎉 I also just wanted to tell you that you’re one of the reasons why I started my RUclips channel. It’s such a baby channel with basically no views, but I’m going to give it a shot. So thank you! You are an inspiration. ❤️
Thank you Birch Living for sponsoring!
Click here birchliving.com/SilverandSolo
to get 20% off your Birch mattress (plus two free Eco-Rest pillows!) during their Extended Cyber Monday Sale. Offers are subject to change. #birchliving
I’ve never really had my very own space in my house. About six months ago, my husband and I decided to get a “sleep divorce”. I took over the tiniest room in our house, splurged on a new bed/mattress with my side hustle money, and created a reading/meditation nook. My new space brings me so much joy (and everyone’s sleep is so much better)! The only problem: I never want to leave my room!
I am 47, and my husband is 52. If I asked for a sleep divorce, he would divorce me. At what age do you think I could keep my marriage and sleep?
Hey! Talk to him! Sleep is so very important and he must MUST want you healthy?
We started sleeping in different rooms years ago because I was a night shift worker and a very light sleeper. Husband jitterbugs and snores loudly. We both enjoy playing together and then going to our own beds to stretch out and flop around to our heart’s content.
I accidentally hit the dislike button, sorry! Yes, my husband and I have radically different sleep schedules. We get in together time and then go our separate ways! @anneteselent
@@emilycarnes3162 I would make the argument that if you were both well slept that you would be bringing your best selves to the marriage every day
Here's a sobering thought. I worked my career as a paramedic, I loved every second, it never effected me and I was just born to do that. The job that really sticks at the back of my mind was going to a 60 year old chap, the day after he retired from a life in a factory, his wife and him had their retirement all planned out. She was telling us all these amazing plans as we tried to resus him..... all that time waiting and for what?
It really hit home.
So, 2 years ago I was finally pushed out of my beloved career and now I live, travel and truly LIVE my life from my van. Every day I wake to new experiences, joy, hope. And your channel has helped me start this wonderful new adventure on RUclips, Thanks Soooooo much. :)
And finally. Woo Hoo CONGRATS on the 100th upload. (ps, Dec 22nd I upload my 2000th!!! Podcast for meditation) . Stay awesome and keep inspiring us silver (and bald) solo's.
Paramedics are amazing! I was helped by some paramedics recently. Much respect to you for doing that career which must have been very challenging at times and I totally understand your decision to make the most out of your later years.
There is no need to defer joy. Everyday that we wake up is a gift and the last segment of journey to retirement is joyful. Taking joy in the small pleasures in life - watching nature, having a good cup of coffee, and hearing a favorite song are all small sources of joy that can be appreciated on a daily basis.
Ah… yes. The simple (and free) things in life are the best !!!
I agree 💯 percent!
Could not agree more!
I agree 100%!! It's the little things in life that do it for me these days. Love on yourself and your life.
Serendiptiously, I very recently watched a Tiny House video where the person said, "Don't someday your life away". There's a lesson in that, one that's being repeated. I rewatched Mamma Mia! and the big takehome for me was to let go and revel in the joy of living. I've spent nearly all of my life planning and striving first to survive and then to succeed. So now I'm wearing my good clothes, spraying on my good perfume, using the good dishes...
I love this -- thank you! Time to use the good dishes ... every day!
Someday is not a day of the week.
Sky is a beauty. I'm turning 70, solo, waiting on $ and I plan to move then. I wanted to get a companion/ESA dog but wanted to wait until I moved. I was also willing to have it happen if the circumstances appeared right. My friend runs an animal rescue. I saw a post for a small chihuahua and said I would take him if pet parent was not found. No adoption cuz parent was found. She had another small dog. He was a poodle/chi mix, a bit bigger than I thought I wanted, but the right age, color, perhaps a bit too energetic. In 3 months, this dog has changed my life.
I’m so glad you found your furry companion!
Thanks @@silverandsolo
My brothrr who lived alone next door was diagnosef with incurable cancer just as I was teturning ti health and a fuller life after my surgery the year before. I had to defet travel plans and freedoms I had been looking forward to in order to help. He died over a month ago now and frankly I feel too tired to do much of anything big now. But I'm.enjoyimg the rest and the peace and knowing I gave all I had.
And I'm making plans for simple joys daily. And reconnecting with old friends.❤
I wish you strength to overcome the pain and planning on simple joys is so wise.
It's the hardest thing to take care of a loved one. So sorry for your loss. Rest, it will do you good. x
Great video Jen! A timely reminder for all of us. "Life is what happens when you're busy doing something else..." 🤓
I think it's so true!
Three months ago I left my husband of 46 years. I had been wanting to do it for a couple of years. I sold my shares of our home to my step son ( my husband’s youngest) and bought a small townhouse for myself. Moved in on the Monday and Tuesday morning I had a stroke. Of course it was a bolt out of the blue. Looking back I see how the sale and purchase transactions were super stressful, (not the marriage breakup). Lucky for me it was a small stroke but a warning sign, my blood pressure was super high. I love living on my own, love my little townhouse and consider myself very lucky. I have just celebrated my 75th birthday two days ago. Should have done this years ago but I am looking forward to many happy and healthy years with my daughters and grandchildren close by. Thank you for your u tube channel , I really enjoy it.
That's an incredible story, and I'm so happy you are doing well!
For all of us who made that mistake we realized we didn't have the energy to do the things we were planning on. Life happens so enjoy your life
don't overdo because you have to live in your spacesuit no matter how old it is.🎉
I'm retired (3 years now) and I find myself wondering just what I was SO looking forward to - other than not having to get up at 4:30 in the morning! I'm working on enjoying a simpler, slower pace of life. I'm trying to embrace 'do it now' for things I've always wanted to do. Not so easy. I enjoy your viewpoints and 'face to face' chats with your camera! I can't imagine it being easy to maintain 'eye contact' with a lens - but it works for your viewers! I'm also an introvert and my social contacts have dwindled considerably since retirement - thanks for your video about this - I feel less 'odd' knowing that preferring my own company to the stresses of mixing with others is my 'normal'! I can't think of any questions for you at the moment - but I look forward to hearing what others ask and your answers!
CONGRATULATIONS on 100 videos! I have watched many of them.
I have found that happiness is not the destination but learning to enjoy the journey. Strangely enough, I learned this from my son. I am now retired and have time to do everything I once said would make me happy. However, at 70, I have found that I have time but am short on energy. I spend some time each week with my granddaughter after school. It is amazing how spending time with this little one gives me energy, and I appreciate every minute she is here with me. I also find that with my new channel, I am much more focused on seeing the positive things I can write about in life. I have lived a full and busy life and have many times deferred my happiness. But today is my day, and I have found happiness in sharing some of those stories and helping others. I am not as good as you in my storytelling, but I am not done yet; I am still a work-in-progress.
I recently came across a long list of places I wanted to travel to, written in my 20’s. 45 years later, I went to exactly none of these places. Too busy with day to day life, kids, career that ate up way too much of me. Now I don’t even feel like traveling. So yes, do what you can when you can, as life changes you in ways you don’t expect.
OMG, look for wins instead of losses! Yes! 🎉❤
Very timely video for me! 22 hours before I retire for the second time. This time I am determined to succeed 😊
Don't succeed, just enjoy no matter what it looks like.
I believe it so much Jen! Once I hit my 70’s they’re going faster than the 60’s. So I’m traveling more and I’m now even looking to find an apartment in Netherlands to spend a few months! I am not deferring, any longer, the desire to spend more time with a daughter and her family that live there. Let’s all take to heart this way of thinking and go out and do whatever you need to do- life is waiting to see you- where???
Congratulations on your 100th!
Well done!
Congrats on the 100th Video! I think this was actually one of my favorite videos you've done. Plenty of deferred joy we've seen in our lives, and trying to teach that message to our kids... "don't wait for graduating...." "don't want until you get your license.... " "don't wait until you have a 'real job'" etc. Was very timely message for us, certainly!
Thanks so much! All the best for your holidays and the New Year!
Tomorrow is not promised! I have had breast cancer and lymph node cancer. There is NO deferring happiness. I am going for it, no waiting. I started my new channel and it is a daily reminder to be kind, be the best version of myself, stop waiting, be happy and embrace every moment good and bad. congrats on the 100 episode xoxo thanks Jen
Good for you, live for today. I sure hope you are keeping cancer at bay. Best wishes.
@@Jana-wz7dr awe thanks, yes I kicked it's butt and now I am living for today xoxo
I’m so glad you’re embracing life.
No one knows if they'll wake up tomorrow so you go girl!🇨🇦🙋♀️
🇨🇦Tomorrows not promised ... Go get it
Jen, in honor of your 100th video I am subscribing ! Not going to defer my happiness today. Thanks for sharing your humor, candor, and knowledge . Congratulations on your milestone. Merry Christmas. 🎄
I had a countdown timer for my retirement. It dragged on forever until the day finally came. And that first summer off (first summer off since age16) two really bad things happened that impacted my life. So, the lesson is there, enjoy while you can.
Yes enjoy while you can, tomorrow is not promised. take care
I have had a countdown timer to my retirement for 2 years. It brings me joy to look at it. I looked at it every once in a while 2 years ago, monthly a year ago, and now I look at it every day and smile. 5 months 0 weeks and 5 days to go! I am 70. Also, I have always kept a journal and recorded what I did that day. It’s something I highly recommend, like Jen.
I just love your video's, you are so encouraging. I had a count down clock also, and I can't believe it's been 10 years this year that I retired. If you think the time is slow to retirement, wait until it comes and see how fast it goes by. It doesn't take much to make me happy. Happy in my sewing room making a quilt or embroidering, happy with friends playing Bridge or Mahjongg, happy seeing the deer tracks out in the snow in the morning. Happy Holidays to you. Best Wishes.
sewing, playing games with friends, family, deer tracks in the snow ... that is what life is about. thanks for sharing
CONGRATS ON YOUR 100TH VIDEO! I am really happy to have "stumbled upon" your channel this year! Oh, my God! What a deep topic, Jen, you are discussing! How we feel at the present moment is extremely important not only because it will never come back, but because it has an enormous impact on our future, the greatest part of which is our HEALTH. Joy as well as gratitude and satisfaction, are at the root of it. Why does this understanding often come late? This concept should be taught at school since it paves your life. Very lucky are those whose parents could teach that attitude to them…I was not among those people. Up until my 58, I earned one certificate or a diploma after another in order to build my career (for which, I assume, I was born and which I loved). At 64, I still did not have a job that would allow me to retire with a decent pension, so my plan was to continue working well after retirement age. Never did it happen… because of an illness…I was not angry, did not blame anyone, just surrendered to the fact and did everything I could like “A Frog in a Milk Pail”. Now, I know the value of joy, satisfaction and gratitude much-much better. I wish I could write in a diary, like you, Jen. What I did once was, on recommendation by deeply respected Louise Hay, making a list of 40 items, for which I was/am grateful. Other than that, when I go to bed and when I wake up, I silently express my sincere gratitude, which inevitably leads to joy, for my life and everything in it. The one and only plan I have now is to make every moment of my life joyful and calm.
take care Vera, thanks for sharing
@@SandyAMacKenzie Thanks, Sandy!
Such a good subject - after I left the work world at age 62 (7 yrs ago) and allowed some adjustment time - I suddenly GOT what you’re saying. Even down to the small things like knitting something with the “good” yarn I’ve been saving, and then of course the big things like solo travel somewhere far away. Studying stoic philosophy has helped me with this - the realization that I could be dead tomorrow. I enjoy your channel!
How long did it take you to adjust in retirement? I can retire any time now and I'm finding it difficult to pick a date because ... once I retire, I can't go back and I really love my job and the people I work with but .. I've been here over 34 years!
@@ArdawnaI put a lot of thought into how I’d spend my time before I ever left my job. I took as much vacation time as I could the last few years I worked so I could “practice” being unemployed, developed hobbies, as well as volunteer interests. Once I left work it probably took 6 months to a year to structure my time the way I wanted. Keep in mind that most people retire when they’re forced to either because they’re pushed out of their job by the employer or their health makes it such that they can no longer work. Knowing that helped decide to be proactive in planning my future.
I wish these lessons could be taught in highschool. My kids go to a particularly competitive school and are constantly judged and compared to peers. Their value, self worth measured by constantly attaining …fill in the blank.
If only young people could have discussions, lectures around being content here and now and not putting off self respect until perfection is achieved..maybe mental health wouldn’t be so vague.
Lovely messages in this video. Always enjoy watching you.
To change them you need to change their school.
@@MGE9436 I couldn't agree more. I'm not trying to be unkind, but why not have the discussions and lectures around being content, with your children right now? You've learned a huge life lesson, share it with your children.
Knowing what brings you joy is helpful. Some people spend too much time looking at what others have, thinking that they have more "joy" aka: stuff.
I am so over the stuff, I have to dust it, clean it, move it, get rid of it lol
That's very true about not deferring happiness and also appreciating what we have already. I'm only 41 but I have recently had two health problems back to back. At one point I wasn't sure that I'd survive and I definitely felt regret for procrasinating and not having done certain things. And also, although I always appreciated my good health, I felt like I could have done more with it because having a physically healthy body with energy Is one of the biggest blessings in life. I'm still recovering but I'm doing much better now so I feel like I've been given another chance to keep going. I've been reflecting on everything and reviewing my life so that I can go forward focusing on and doing what matters and not not wasting my time because none of us know how long we have.
Kate tomorrows not promised! I too have a second and third chance at life...Let's go get it💜
Great topic, Jen! An extension to this , and what I aspire to is the quote from a songwriter named Nightbirde ( Jane), she passed away from cancer at a young age but right to the end, she found some form of joy in each day and even brought herself to win the gold on an American Talent show all while undergoing chemo. Her quote was this:
“You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore before you decide to be happy” . Boy, Isn’t that the truth though….happiness/ joy really is a decision. I love your channel, and look forward to seeing you in January. Merry Christmas! 🎄
I remember seeing Nightbird. She was amazing. I am sorry that she lost her battle. She was so filled with joy. She probably experienced more in her all-too-short life than most people much older. A beautiful soul.
yes happiness is a decision, thanks for the reminder. Enjoy the day
Congratulations on your 100th episode, Jen!I enjoy your calming, thought-provoking, and informative videos very much. Cheers to you and best wishes for 100 more videos to share!
Thanks so much for the kind words!
Jen, Congratulations on 100 Videos. We are the same age and you share EXCELLENT advice…Years before my husband was diagnosed with cancer at age 53 we would randomly take “long weekend trips” a few times a year! Had we waited for retirement, that “someday” would have never happened. September 2021 at age 55 he went to his heavenly home. I’m so grateful for the love we shared & and the great memories we made along the way. I continue to live a grateful life and continue making memories with my adult children, grandchild, family, and friends! I actually “ice skated” (most of it holding the rail😂) this weekend and had a fun time skating with my 24 year old daughter.
I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you have great memories and are making new ones. Enjoy the moment
Congrats on video 100. Whooooo-hooo! Deferred joy? When we were younger I think we felt like we had to "pay our dues." Like we didn't deserve it quite yet. But there's never really a day when - okay, now is the perfect time. Such a lovely message. Thank you.
Congratulations on your 100th!
What is joyful? Who knows, I'm 72, female, have part time work, each day an adventure. Doing well financially overall. You're headed towards 100k subscribers, too!
There are 7 days in a week. Someday, isn't one of them... TP under, awesome. My retirement date is still quite fluid, since I still see it 5 years out. But. I'm planning as if I might retire sooner... Never know.
Happiness begins the moment you choose to be happy. I know some channels are saying "it's over", but I don't agree. I have the rest of my life ahead of me!!! Tomorrow is never guaranteed. I don't agree with YOLO, because, you LIVE everyday. You Only Die Once...
Be well. Be kind, Be happy!!!
thank you for the kind words, enjoy the journey and good luck with your retirement
Great video and really resonated with me about taking control of my own happiness and living in the moment rather than waiting for it to happen or for someone else to provide it
Love love love, you beautiful mind. Thank you
Congratulations Jen! 😊
Congratulations!!!
Congrats on your 100th episode. I really enjoy your videos. I have two questions. 1. I saw that someone else asked you how old you will be when you retire. I am curious what month you chose and why. 2. Have you ever been on a train trip? I am flying from the Island to Halifax and taking the train back for my 65th birthday. You have made me want a countdown clock till my retirement, but I don't really want to retire, I love my job so much.
Congratulations!🎉
Congrats, Jen on your 100th episode! Well done! Your episodes are informative and great! Thank you!
Thank you so much!
Loved the video. Thx as always and congrats on the milestone. Very exciting. 🎉
Thanks so much for the reminder to "Be Happy Now!" And, I am going to find a way to get my RUclips channel going. Thank you! ☂️🌞💜
You are absolutely correct. I’ve never thought about the waiting Time. Such a great point. Thank you!
Happy 100th video too. That
Is an accomplishment
Thanks for the congrats on the milestone!
100 videos...well done Jen. Congratulations 🥂🥂. I always worried I “didn’t have enough”..$s, time, stuff. Then I got cancer....the gift of remission 8 years later is looking back on 8 years of truly valuing every moment/day/...I’m not perfect but when I start to get in the dumps I switch on that gratitude switch and change my mood. I feel soooo blessed to have those extra years cancer free...I’ve been able to have fun and know my grandchildren, speak my wisdom to my family, be generous, say “yes” to life. It’s easy to get bitter and ask “why me”. But if you are blessed to wake up for another morning in good health, seize the moment, watch the day unfurl, smell the rose you just picked, hug and kiss your loved ones, smile, be cheerful, be involved...but mostly,..be so very grateful for another precious day. Wishing you every happiness at Christmas and may 2025 bring you hope and good health.
Oh! And always say “thank you” for every kindness shown to you. Sending blessings to you.
Congratulations on your 100th episode! Really enjoy your channel.
Thanks so much!
Congratulations on 100. 🎉 love your channel. Beautiful dog 🐾🐾. Merry Christmas
congratulations!
Congratulations on your 100th video Jen!💗🤗 I love your channel and your walks with Sky.💕
You are right, we do not have to limit ourselves--why postpone happiness (or being content) when it is possible to be happy now as well as down the road? In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius wrote, “This is the mark of perfection of character--to spend each day as if it were your last, without frenzy, laziness, or any pretending.” And thank you for the heads up on the mattress--waking feeling rested is fundamental.
Wow! Congrats on your 100th video! 🥳😁👍 Great topic today. Like most people early in my life I had what I called Someday Syndrome. But, apparently life had other plans for my life. Hit some hard bumps along the way so I had to redraw plans with each one. So, when I was eventually forced into early retirement that didn't look anything like I had planned. As a matter of fact, very little of my life worked out according to plan. And, yes, there was some depression along the way. One day I heard someone sharing in a group setting about focussing on the small, simple things in her day made her more aware of herself and others in the moment and eventually her depression lifted. She ended by saying something along the lines of pay attention to today and you'll see reasons for positivity and live today to the fullest with what you have and where you are and give what you can. So, when I lay my head on my pillow at night, my heart is at peace and I smile. So, I gave it a shot. It took some practice because I wasn't used to focussing on the positive and living in the moment. But, it paid off. And she was right. 🙂 Already looking forward to our next chat. Have a great week and Happy Holidays! --Paula in Ohio USA 🙋
Congratulations on 100
Wonderful reminder for us all , especially holiday season “when “ we get together with family and friends! When……is now! Enjoy🎄
So true and well said.
100 ! Congratulation and Thank you !! May there be many more.
Congratulations on 100 videos. I'm so happy for you & I look forward to the next 10,000!!! ❤
Congratulations Jen!
🥳Congratulations on 100 🌟
At 50, I decided I was worth the good butter. Baby steps!
🛌 A good mattress makes a huge difference👍😴
You are worth the good butter and so much more
Thank you, Jen for this great video and congratulations on your 100th episode. I believe that today is always the present and you have to live for now not the future you can plan, but after a few health scares reality comes to mind and you need to enjoy yourself so when I can, I enjoy buying things for myself and living the life I need to live. Thank you so much. Looking forward to your Q&A in the new year.
I try to follow my dogs lead....he lives for the moment.😊
Congratulations to you! 🎉
Nice milestone made! Congratulations!
That was fantastic - the words ... ❤❤❤
Thank you so much 😀
Congratulations from Australia ❤❤❤well done 🎉
Congrats on 100 videos!
When tomorrow gets here it's today and it's now. Might as well enjoy now😊 ... things have always worked out so far and I at some point decided to trust that they always will. Helps me live my life with more ease. You make excellent points 😊
Congratulations on your 100th video! Blessings to you from Texas.
Congratulations!
Thank you for this video, i am planning a no-spend year next year 2025..and putting off on a planned dream vacation,...I think I can do both...but afraid to..when you get in your 60s you really can no longer waste your time or lose your dreams....i really don't have enough to retire...working harder doesn't seem to be the Answer...but working smarter is...very encouraging video.
100th video. Wow. Congratulations.
Congrats!
Wow; 100 videos!!! Congrats 🎉🎉👏👏
Congratulations on 100 videos 🎉🎉🎉🎉
I also see that you are over 90k subscribers. 🎉🎉🎉🎉
I just want you to know that you have been a great Inspiration for me to keep going
Love your videos keep up the good work!
Jen, I try to appreciate each day and I find joy in the simple pleasures. Thanks for inspiring us. I enjoyed your ad. You are a natural!
Joyeux Noël! 🎄
Congrats on your hundredth video, Jen 🎉🎉❤❤
🥳 🥳🥳Congratulations on reaching 100!
Despite being one of those crazy “tp under” people I really enjoy the wisdom you share on this channel. I‘ll be starting my last year of work January 1, I’m one of those people who can’t afford to retire in a year but I’m going to do it anyway. My job is busy and stressful with endless irritations. If I don’t retire sooner than later I’m afraid it’s going to kill me. I’d rather have a quiet retirement at home than drop dead from stress 5 years from now trying to save up enough to retire so we can……..?
Nailed it!
Congratulations on 100 videos! 🎊🎉🎊🎉🎊🎉
Yay!! CONGRATULATIONS 🎈🎊🎉🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
Congratulations! 😀
Congratulations on 💯 videos! 🎉🎉
Very true, Jen! Happy Holidays! I'm loving my christmas tree this year, switching to soft cream, gold and pink decorations and soft, white lights. Enjoy that mattress! I'm celebrating my 71st birthday in Arizona this January. Carpe Diem! 👍😎🇨🇦
Massive congratulations, Jen!!! I've been with you since 13 or 14,000 subscribers and I love your channel.
I too am silver and solo (I'm growing out the hair dye and going back to my natural colour (grey) for the first time in 25 years) and I also have the retirement countdown clock on my phone. One countdown for my desired retirement age of 60 and one for the state retirement age of 67.
I was really interested to see this video title. We've had it drilled into us over the last couple of decades that delayed gratification is better for us. That it makes us healthier and more successful etc. The Marshmallow Test way became the **only** successful way to live, or so we were told.
You're so right, though. What about the unhappier times of zero gratification and denial that we have to go through to reach **the day** of gratification? What if we then find that, after years of denial scrimping and saving, we're no happier? What if we could have been content for those intervening 20 years instead, but we intentionally missed out on that joy?
Oh Jen, how I relate to this video. I used to defer happiness. I used to “wait until…”
Now, I GO FOR IT!
I’m turning 62 in January and I’ve made many strides and hit some good goals in the last 4 years.
I’ve also made a few bad decisions.
However in general, I’m pretty happy with my life lately. Thanks for your videos.
I look forward to them every week.
Congrats on 100, Jen 🎉id love to know more about your dog. Male or Female? Rescue? Age? Those kind of things ❤
Wait until - those words are so true! I am 69 and decided to do 70 things I've never done before by the time I turn 70. Been 69 a whole month :-). The 1st few I've never done before are easy lol.
Congratulations, I’m happy for you. And you’re right, under is the best. 🤣 This is a great message. Thank you.
Congrats on your 100th video, Jen! What advice would you give a person in their 30s? Also who is your favourite character from the Game of Thrones books/A Song of Fire and Ice?
Congrats! I love your videos. You have a soothing voice.
Thank you so much!
Love your journal entries
Great content! I am on track to start my RUclips on the 23rd of January. Thanks for your encouragement. Good idea to journal the positive.
This has been on my mind. Thank you.
Congrats on 100 videos! 🎉
I also just wanted to tell you that you’re one of the reasons why I started my RUclips channel. It’s such a baby channel with basically no views, but I’m going to give it a shot. So thank you! You are an inspiration. ❤️
Great advise , Jen. And I’m totally with you on the toilet paper thing! 😄
Congratulations on 100 videos! Great advice.
I do love watching your videos! Thank you
Happy 100!!
Congrats on your 100th !! 💐