Hey there Sarah! You're probably tired of hearing from me, but then again it's your fault for having such an awesome channel...lol!!! This one REALLY hits home! I was forced to attend a full gospel church by my mom until I was 15. I found it to be a traumatic experience for as a child, I was what you would call hypersensitive. I would watch these adults(my mom included)sing, dance, speak in tongues, cry, shake when getting prayed for, slain in the spirit and engage in other "forms of worship" This really disturbed me and I would dread every Sunday morning as I knew what I was about to endure and I would have anxiety. I also went to a private Christian high school that had the same form of worship and atmosphere. This created deep emotional scars that I still battle with today. Even watching people get baptized in water makes me somewhat nervous. Things that happen in childhood can have the greatest impact on someone. I had been so against the church and Christianity for the longest time. I've had so many people witness to me and talk to me about Jesus, but the trauma I experienced as a child is so ingrained and deep seeded, that I just find it hard to trust the Christian faith. However, I don't mind talking to you about these things because you seemed to be very down to earth and understanding of such things. Even if you don't know what to tell me, just by hearing me out, you've done plenty. If you don't mind me asking, what faith/denomination were you raised in? Maybe you could do a clip on church trauma or legalism(another one of my issues). Who knows maybe you can create a website to discuss these topics and call it something like Sanctified with Sarah.com or such!
Your a beautiful woman and no one deserves any kind of abuse, like physical or emotional, especially as kids . Like getting scolded or getting yelled at is wrong. Teach by example with love and kindness.but forgiveness is key most people have been hurt , gotta be tough and also understanding. Have love that is the most important thing, listen to your heart. Forgive your parents forgive everyone. A lot of people were hurt themselves and sadly dont know any better or feel the love they should. You are loved love , so much love my friend. Enjoy your life don't dwell on past hurt but learn from it and turn that into love and wisdom.
I was not in school to go to school , Christian schools from K-12 . Many meetings with the "paddle" .Only served to reset my behavior until the next paddling !
This is a very interesting discussion. I’ve wondered about the proper time to introduce the gospel to a young child. Since I was 6 years old I don’t think I ever fully comprehended how sinful I was & therefore never really appreciated the gospel & atonement of Jesus. Also, being a Christian & going through my rebellious teenage years simultaneously prob made me lukewarm. Was I truly saved at 6? I often wonder. In some ways I think it’s good for us to experience sin apart from Christ first so we can actually have a before Christ after Christ comparison to notice a change. It makes things a little confusing when you experience so much sin after coming to Christ because then it’s what you are used to & you begin to think it’s normal for a Christian to just live in sin. Is there a correct time & formula? Probably not. Am I better off or worse off coming to Christ at 6 years old? I honestly can’t say. Like I said, I was in so much sin in my teenage & college years that I really do wonder if I was saved. Now that I’m older & taking it more seriously I run into a lot of confusing ideas about the gospel & salvation. Particularly as it relates to sin & whether or not we are saved if we continue to sin. If I can’t answer that question then I feel unqualified to preach the gospel to anyone. Could I stop all sin if I tried really hard? I could get better I’m sure, but is that the gospel? Is this the ultimate goal of the gospel? To get us to stop sinning? Or is it to save us in spite of our sin? I’m currently asking myself what are we saved from? Sin? The penalty of sin? The wrath of God? Death? Sorry for all the questions. To answer your question, I’m not entirely sure “the rod” referred to in the Bible is speaking of physical punishment. God corrects us with His word so I’m thinking the rod is probably teaching precepts more so than an actual rod used to beat your child with. I’d have to look into it more. James talks about a bridle used to train a horse but I don’t think he wants us to do that to ourselves, he’s just making a point that we need to control our tongue. And the fact that it rarely works (physical punishment) tells me we probably have been misinterpreting scripture. My parents did force me to go to church & I did end up hating church & as soon as I went to college I was thrilled about no longer having to go. When I was 5 Sunday morning was pancakes Loony Tunes & dad working in the living room on his drafts. Then when I was 6 we started going to church & the cartoons & pancakes stopped & I felt like I rarely saw my dad after that. He became very serious & didn’t seem that fun to be around. I still can’t tell you what good those 12 years of church did for me. Maybe it was good for my parents, but those felt like dead years to me. My mind was only on 2 things: girls & basketball. I probably felt like I knew all there was to know about God & Christianity. I’m sure that’s why church felt pointless. I wouldn’t say I ever stopped being a Christian or stopped believing. I just stopped being religious. Even when I started going back to church voluntarily after graduating college it felt like it eventually turned into dead religion again. I did that for probably 9 years until I stopped completely. Now I am part of a house church. Because of my personal experience I would probably be very hesitant to have a definite plan in place for a child. I’m more likely to feel them out before making any decisions for them. I definitely want them to feel like they are being heard & I’m not just making them do what I want them to do or do things “because I said so.” I just can’t help but look back at the 12 years I had with my parents & think about the potential relationship we could have built together if church didn’t get in the way.
Agree with a lot of the things you said. I tried to understand the Rod in context and it is a literal phrase however I feel that the overruling Law of loving one another and loving the Lord with all your heart would lead someone to wisdom in how to handle children through the power of the Holy Spirit. I think this proverb was written when it was normal to stone people, to have multiple wives, so yea.... Now if I had a nasty back talking tiny child where talking to them in gentle kindness was doing nothing, I can see a good slap being helpful but then again I don't know I am not a parent.
@Sarah Speaks Up That seems really nuanced that your parents introduced physical discipline so late in your life at the age of 13; my parents stopped spanking me when I was 14, and I thought that was far too old so I couldn't even imagine what it was like for you having to start being spanked at 13. What were the protocol/procedures of how spanking were administered to you? I know that the varying specifics of those can definitely have an impact.
Hey there Sarah! You're probably tired of hearing from me, but then again it's your fault for having such an awesome channel...lol!!! This one REALLY hits home! I was forced to attend a full gospel church by my mom until I was 15. I found it to be a traumatic experience for as a child, I was what you would call hypersensitive. I would watch these adults(my mom included)sing, dance, speak in tongues, cry, shake when getting prayed for, slain in the spirit and engage in other "forms of worship" This really disturbed me and I would dread every Sunday morning as I knew what I was about to endure and I would have anxiety. I also went to a private Christian high school that had the same form of worship and atmosphere. This created deep emotional scars that I still battle with today. Even watching people get baptized in water makes me somewhat nervous. Things that happen in childhood can have the greatest impact on someone. I had been so against the church and Christianity for the longest time. I've had so many people witness to me and talk to me about Jesus, but the trauma I experienced as a child is so ingrained and deep seeded, that I just find it hard to trust the Christian faith. However, I don't mind talking to you about these things because you seemed to be very down to earth and understanding of such things. Even if you don't know what to tell me, just by hearing me out, you've done plenty. If you don't mind me asking, what faith/denomination were you raised in? Maybe you could do a clip on church trauma or legalism(another one of my issues). Who knows maybe you can create a website to discuss these topics and call it something like Sanctified with Sarah.com or such!
Your a beautiful woman and no one deserves any kind of abuse, like physical or emotional, especially as kids . Like getting scolded or getting yelled at is wrong. Teach by example with love and kindness.but forgiveness is key most people have been hurt , gotta be tough and also understanding. Have love that is the most important thing, listen to your heart. Forgive your parents forgive everyone. A lot of people were hurt themselves and sadly dont know any better or feel the love they should. You are loved love , so much love my friend. Enjoy your life don't dwell on past hurt but learn from it and turn that into love and wisdom.
good words thank you
Facts,,definitely needs to be heard
Thank you for sharing your story. I sent it to a friend of mine that has a young daughter.
I was not in school to go to school , Christian schools from K-12 . Many meetings with the "paddle" .Only served to reset my behavior until the next paddling !
interesting thank you for sharing.
This is a very interesting discussion. I’ve wondered about the proper time to introduce the gospel to a young child. Since I was 6 years old I don’t think I ever fully comprehended how sinful I was & therefore never really appreciated the gospel & atonement of Jesus. Also, being a Christian & going through my rebellious teenage years simultaneously prob made me lukewarm. Was I truly saved at 6? I often wonder. In some ways I think it’s good for us to experience sin apart from Christ first so we can actually have a before Christ after Christ comparison to notice a change. It makes things a little confusing when you experience so much sin after coming to Christ because then it’s what you are used to & you begin to think it’s normal for a Christian to just live in sin. Is there a correct time & formula? Probably not.
Am I better off or worse off coming to Christ at 6 years old? I honestly can’t say. Like I said, I was in so much sin in my teenage & college years that I really do wonder if I was saved. Now that I’m older & taking it more seriously I run into a lot of confusing ideas about the gospel & salvation. Particularly as it relates to sin & whether or not we are saved if we continue to sin. If I can’t answer that question then I feel unqualified to preach the gospel to anyone. Could I stop all sin if I tried really hard? I could get better I’m sure, but is that the gospel? Is this the ultimate goal of the gospel? To get us to stop sinning? Or is it to save us in spite of our sin? I’m currently asking myself what are we saved from? Sin? The penalty of sin? The wrath of God? Death?
Sorry for all the questions. To answer your question, I’m not entirely sure “the rod” referred to in the Bible is speaking of physical punishment. God corrects us with His word so I’m thinking the rod is probably teaching precepts more so than an actual rod used to beat your child with. I’d have to look into it more. James talks about a bridle used to train a horse but I don’t think he wants us to do that to ourselves, he’s just making a point that we need to control our tongue. And the fact that it rarely works (physical punishment) tells me we probably have been misinterpreting scripture.
My parents did force me to go to church & I did end up hating church & as soon as I went to college I was thrilled about no longer having to go. When I was 5 Sunday morning was pancakes Loony Tunes & dad working in the living room on his drafts. Then when I was 6 we started going to church & the cartoons & pancakes stopped & I felt like I rarely saw my dad after that. He became very serious & didn’t seem that fun to be around. I still can’t tell you what good those 12 years of church did for me. Maybe it was good for my parents, but those felt like dead years to me. My mind was only on 2 things: girls & basketball. I probably felt like I knew all there was to know about God & Christianity. I’m sure that’s why church felt pointless. I wouldn’t say I ever stopped being a Christian or stopped believing. I just stopped being religious. Even when I started going back to church voluntarily after graduating college it felt like it eventually turned into dead religion again. I did that for probably 9 years until I stopped completely. Now I am part of a house church.
Because of my personal experience I would probably be very hesitant to have a definite plan in place for a child. I’m more likely to feel them out before making any decisions for them. I definitely want them to feel like they are being heard & I’m not just making them do what I want them to do or do things “because I said so.” I just can’t help but look back at the 12 years I had with my parents & think about the potential relationship we could have built together if church didn’t get in the way.
Agree with a lot of the things you said. I tried to understand the Rod in context and it is a literal phrase however I feel that the overruling Law of loving one another and loving the Lord with all your heart would lead someone to wisdom in how to handle children through the power of the Holy Spirit. I think this proverb was written when it was normal to stone people, to have multiple wives, so yea.... Now if I had a nasty back talking tiny child where talking to them in gentle kindness was doing nothing, I can see a good slap being helpful but then again I don't know I am not a parent.
@Sarah Speaks Up That seems really nuanced that your parents introduced physical discipline so late in your life at the age of 13; my parents stopped spanking me when I was 14, and I thought that was far too old so I couldn't even imagine what it was like for you having to start being spanked at 13. What were the protocol/procedures of how spanking were administered to you? I know that the varying specifics of those can definitely have an impact.
Yes it was definitely uncomfortable and I think they were just unsure how to handle me. That is all I can share on that specific topic lol