Breakthrough In Fleet Design Allows Ships To Fly Up And Down

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  • Опубликовано: 3 янв 2025

Комментарии • 220

  • @Silverraptorvideos
    @Silverraptorvideos 4 года назад +1424

    "Area Empire Declares Bankruptcy after undocking fleet from Spaceport."
    Been there, done that. XD

    • @Truemmerphantom
      @Truemmerphantom 4 года назад +158

      "Inwards Perfectionists announce plan to permanently shield own planet."
      That's a 200 IQ move if you ask me. ^_^

    • @gabrielclark1425
      @gabrielclark1425 4 года назад +32

      @@Truemmerphantom They need to get with the times, it's not like the old days when food production was local instead of global. They're all going to starve by the end of the month!

    • @natalie6811
      @natalie6811 4 года назад +39

      Gabriel Clark Relax, they’re an Agri world.
      The rest of their empire though...

    • @badpiggies988
      @badpiggies988 3 года назад +5

      Ikr, I build a fleet to try and protect myself from a bunch of equally-strong neighbors who all don’t want me to exist and my energy credits plummet no matter how many generators, orbital solar panel stations or grids I spam

    • @bigboy6293
      @bigboy6293 2 года назад +1

      Way too often for me

  • @lowenergyvideos4658
    @lowenergyvideos4658 4 года назад +841

    "Ha we have them outnumbered 10 to 1!"
    "Sir we have the enemy fleet on scanners...but...where are they?!"
    "I can't see anything right in front of us!"
    "My god....I think we need to...look, up?"
    *Everyone turns to face the captain with worry on their faces*

    • @paulwayne8367
      @paulwayne8367 4 года назад +88

      Enemy corvette destroys 10 Crusier all because the couldn't target the enemy.

    • @UglyJaguar
      @UglyJaguar 3 года назад +4

      😂😂

    • @Nyrufa
      @Nyrufa 3 года назад +25

      Plot Twist: They had to look... DOWN!

    • @lowenergyvideos4658
      @lowenergyvideos4658 3 года назад +21

      @@Nyrufashhh don't spoil the sequel!

    • @inserisciunnome
      @inserisciunnome 3 года назад +4

      @@Nyrufa oh GOD

  • @Mohgbloodlordnihil
    @Mohgbloodlordnihil 4 года назад +959

    This should be classified as a dangerous technology.

    • @svijj_
      @svijj_ 4 года назад +51

      Indeed, and should be banned by the Galactic Community indefinetly

    • @harbl99
      @harbl99 4 года назад +19

      Or a DLC.

    • @ferdinand5223
      @ferdinand5223 4 года назад +33

      The new associated crisis should be extradimensional Australians.

    • @noblebork7444
      @noblebork7444 4 года назад +2

      This could destroy the galaxy as we know it!

    • @TheNavyShark
      @TheNavyShark 4 года назад +12

      @@ferdinand5223 The only counter to Extradimensional Australians is Extradimensional Synthetic Emus.

  • @MrPraczynsky
    @MrPraczynsky 4 года назад +474

    Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should

    • @MrBigCookieCrumble
      @MrBigCookieCrumble 4 года назад +8

      Well, there it is

    • @neinherman9989
      @neinherman9989 4 года назад +1

      I really hate that Voor...

    • @thedemonhater7748
      @thedemonhater7748 3 года назад +8

      *insert 2 paragraph long anomaly explanation saying how figuring out how to toast both sides of a slice of bread at once was the natural first step in an extinct species’ decline*

    • @chemplay866
      @chemplay866 Год назад +1

      They were busy being redeployed across the galaxy

  • @roaringbeardragon4531
    @roaringbeardragon4531 4 года назад +538

    Finally! Now I can land my colony ships!

    • @cuttlealert3062
      @cuttlealert3062 4 года назад +76

      Land them like a normal sentient. Crashing it into the surface of the planet

    • @nonya1366
      @nonya1366 4 года назад +66

      @@cuttlealert3062 That'll teach those rock people that us organics can do things too.

    • @cuttlealert3062
      @cuttlealert3062 4 года назад +13

      @@nonya1366 They dont deserve the title of "People"

    • @roaringbeardragon4531
      @roaringbeardragon4531 4 года назад +10

      @@cuttlealert3062 I'm not a lithiod I'm a fanatic xenophobe and refuse to do it their way

    • @AsbestosMuffins
      @AsbestosMuffins 3 года назад +1

      Lithoids "Land?"

  • @Skyx700
    @Skyx700 3 года назад +129

    “As fast as scientists being redeployed across the galaxy”

  • @DB-cn6rw
    @DB-cn6rw 3 года назад +113

    Battle ships that carry troops?! How unreasonable and absolutely insane!

  • @pretzelbomb6105
    @pretzelbomb6105 4 года назад +73

    Is nothing sacred to the Voor? Just last month one of their engineers tried to put two resource silos on the same station!

    • @CM-NightDK
      @CM-NightDK 3 года назад +22

      i... i heard that they have plans to build 2 colossus! they are angering the gods

    • @femboyskeleton9150
      @femboyskeleton9150 3 года назад +9

      Dear god

  • @blstuff
    @blstuff 3 года назад +63

    Ok… I know you can do a lot of stuff in sci-fi, but this just breaks my suspension of disbelief. Its pretty much magic at this point.

    • @J0hnB09
      @J0hnB09 3 года назад +2

      These engineers just need engines on the sides, top, front, and bottom instead of breaking the laws of physics.

  • @JustPippaNY
    @JustPippaNY 4 года назад +100

    Scientists want to use black holes as wormholes? Guys, this isn't Spore!

    • @brianmo2965
      @brianmo2965 3 года назад +2

      We can use black holes as worm tho

    • @J0hnB09
      @J0hnB09 3 года назад +5

      @@brianmo2965 we can use the worm as a black hole, weapon, and god.

  • @CSLucasEpic
    @CSLucasEpic 4 года назад +40

    That's what The Exile was working on in that secret lab...

  • @thefbi9581
    @thefbi9581 4 года назад +60

    We shouldn’t be playing god like this, we should just stick to enlightening sapient creatures and terraforming the worlds we find to perfectly fit us.

  • @battlesheep2552
    @battlesheep2552 4 года назад +80

    There is no up! The galaxy is flat, our holy books say so!

    • @dispensergoinup
      @dispensergoinup 4 года назад +6

      The Science Directorate does not like that

    • @theinquisitor8112
      @theinquisitor8112 4 года назад +2

      If there is no up, why do you have the concept of 'up' at all? Checkmate.

    • @battlesheep2552
      @battlesheep2552 4 года назад +1

      Nobody expects the Inquisition! Xenophiles have a concept of an alien that shouldn’t be exterminated, it doesn’t mean it exists

    • @Lettucem3n
      @Lettucem3n 3 года назад

      The universe is flat. Not the galaxy.

    • @J0hnB09
      @J0hnB09 3 года назад

      Look at the galaxy map closely, you might see that stars aren’t on the galactic plane, and there is no up in space because of scientific reasons such as a lack of gravity.

  • @UltimateSpinDash
    @UltimateSpinDash 4 года назад +36

    I can't wait for this new engine design to become widely available. I always struggle to get into tight parking spaces with my cruiser.

  • @BigMisterApple
    @BigMisterApple 4 года назад +117

    This is absolute madness! Whats next? Some kind of device that allows the user to create wormholes in a certain radius around itself for instant travel?
    There's a reason we can't just fly in any direction; its space, things only work in direct lines! Duh!

    • @CM-NightDK
      @CM-NightDK 3 года назад +10

      well for leaders wich can deploy themselves in a ship 50000 light years away in mere nanoseconds its very possible

  • @Truemmerphantom
    @Truemmerphantom 4 года назад +100

    The Spiritualist Fallen Empires know when an eldritch abomination taints another empire. Join them to bring an End to the Cycle of the Voor Technocracy's making!

    • @nonya1366
      @nonya1366 4 года назад +13

      Hey, don't bring the Cycle into this. We didn't do anything this time.

    • @Watchmanskey
      @Watchmanskey 3 года назад +3

      Don't try to scare us with your Spiritualist ways. Your sad devotion to that ancient religion of yours hasn't helped us in obtaining Unbidden technology. Or given us clairvoyance enough to reveal the location of a new L-Gate

    • @J0hnB09
      @J0hnB09 3 года назад

      If they don’t want anyone to have dangerous technology, then wake them up so they can destroy the empires with the technology and watch as they can’t hit ships above them.

  • @jagothegamer5750
    @jagothegamer5750 4 года назад +30

    Enemy Empire when they see my ships flying above them: *Impossible*
    Me: *It's over, Anakeen, we have the high ground!*

  • @Ajc-ni3xn
    @Ajc-ni3xn 3 года назад +12

    “just go up”
    Engineers, fallen empires, everyone: “And I took that personally.”

  • @aliensinnoh1
    @aliensinnoh1 3 года назад +25

    The Stellaris does actually go up and down, you can see it in the lines traced from each star to the hexagon above or below them which indicate how high or low they are relative to the galactic plane.

    • @Drotdog
      @Drotdog 2 года назад +1

      That’s only in FTL though, using the Z axis elsewhere is demonstrably impure.

  • @heiskanbuscadordelaverdad8709
    @heiskanbuscadordelaverdad8709 4 года назад +109

    this is herresy

    • @awsomeoawsomeo2103
      @awsomeoawsomeo2103 4 года назад +9

      Agreed, how can we allow our brave navy to fly in more than 2 dimensions. There are things out there that will come for us now....

    • @ferrusmanus4013
      @ferrusmanus4013 4 года назад +7

      You are WEAK

    • @the-letter_s
      @the-letter_s 4 года назад +3

      @@ferrusmanus4013 HERETEK

    • @ferrusmanus4013
      @ferrusmanus4013 4 года назад +2

      @@the-letter_s You are WEAK

  • @blacksabre5343
    @blacksabre5343 4 года назад +19

    Man, the Final Order would have loved to have this tech!

    • @52flyingbicycles
      @52flyingbicycles 3 года назад +6

      To be fair, they did offer an in-movie justification: that the storms on Exegol were very strong so it was very difficult to navigate huge ships through the atmosphere. Remember the whole thing with the control tower and the cavalry charge? I suppose the final order didn’t account for the possibility that they would have to fight ON Exegol
      But their real problem was building spaceships inside a planet’s atmosphere to begin with. Not Sheev’s brightest idea!

    • @codyraugh6599
      @codyraugh6599 2 года назад +4

      @@52flyingbicycles or the entire sequal trilligy plot...not his best idea.

    • @AdamantLightLP
      @AdamantLightLP Год назад

      @@52flyingbicyclesEven with modern radar we could maneuver through that storm. The Calvary charge was the dumbest thing in cinema lol.

  • @kasinokaiser1319
    @kasinokaiser1319 4 года назад +13

    Great, tell Sheev about this, I think he needs it!

    • @svijj_
      @svijj_ 4 года назад +7

      Or Anakin. He needs some high ground tbh

  • @ARandomBird452
    @ARandomBird452 3 года назад +17

    Stellaris ships only have guns on the "top". 3 dimensional movements would be a game-changer. Although I'm more interested in the ability to parallel park.

    • @adams13245
      @adams13245 3 года назад +2

      Yeah, space is getting crowded all of a sudden. And we haven't even gotten to the chemist's yet!

  • @AtariEric
    @AtariEric 4 года назад +11

    THE FOURTH WALL CANNAE HOLD ANYMORE!

  • @CepheusTalks
    @CepheusTalks 4 года назад +20

    PC: internally and externally burning

  • @crad5476
    @crad5476 3 года назад +4

    This is the last technology you have to research. Every research apartment needs to have their stuff and research this together, since this is too complicated.

  • @natalie6811
    @natalie6811 4 года назад +27

    As a materialist, I welcome this technology with open arms and hope we use it to crush those fallen empires!

  • @duncanwright8004
    @duncanwright8004 4 года назад +10

    We at the third dimension institute are prepared to give our full support.

  • @TheDominator25
    @TheDominator25 4 года назад +8

    The Final Order could've really used this technology to deal with those Resistance Raiders.

  • @Phelan666
    @Phelan666 4 года назад +4

    Voor Technocracy. Not to be confused with Vore Kleptocracy.

  • @Niemandzockt
    @Niemandzockt 4 года назад +6

    This is the kind of forbidden knowledge that drives people mad

  • @moroteseoinage
    @moroteseoinage 4 года назад +3

    Shots fired

  • @StarHorder
    @StarHorder 4 года назад +5

    Seriously, these guys are just gonna ignore the fact that two corvettes from a federation fleet are filling a star system with alloys rn?

  • @theinternetshavecome1640
    @theinternetshavecome1640 4 месяца назад +1

    I love the way he uncertainly said 'z-axis'.

  • @robinfalkner-wedge824
    @robinfalkner-wedge824 4 года назад +4

    moving in extra-dimentions i can believe- but parrallel parking? Now you're just making stuff up.

  • @avatarwarmech
    @avatarwarmech 4 года назад +3

    So basically Homeworld

  • @carlose4314
    @carlose4314 4 года назад +5

    Parallel parking might need some work

  • @TheYourfaceable
    @TheYourfaceable 4 года назад +3

    Now we've got a one up on Disney's star destroyers! We're unstoppable now!!!

  • @something.icantrememberany1365
    @something.icantrememberany1365 4 года назад +6

    Wait it's xen-o-ni-on? I thought it was xen-onion, like The Onion

  • @El_Presidente_5337
    @El_Presidente_5337 4 года назад +12

    It was always so annoying to move your ship around the planet just to point it into the right direction.

    • @pretzelbomb6105
      @pretzelbomb6105 4 года назад +3

      I once lost half of a naval fleet because their reinforcements got stuck on a space station.

  • @scyobiempire4450
    @scyobiempire4450 4 года назад +2

    WHAT!? The Scyobi needs this...

  • @MsGreenlamp
    @MsGreenlamp 4 года назад +5

    Take it easy, guys! We don't want to end like some Vultaum, right?

  • @Bluewhyte72
    @Bluewhyte72 2 года назад +1

    So time is our Z-axis proving that we are in a sandbox game.

  • @CM-NightDK
    @CM-NightDK 3 года назад +2

    yeah i think that we all should learn the power of the leaders who can be deployed in less then a milisecond in any corner of the galaxy

  • @ThatVillain-the-Gamer
    @ThatVillain-the-Gamer 2 года назад

    I love how they reference the instantaneous scientist redeployment.

  • @akimjocelyn4387
    @akimjocelyn4387 3 года назад +1

    unironically impressive

  • @Biodeamon
    @Biodeamon 4 года назад +8

    the funny thing is scientists in real life is also like the skeptics of the z axis

  • @Quartermaster_Veteran
    @Quartermaster_Veteran 4 года назад +4

    We need a Xenonion News Mod!! Please!!

  • @Idazmi7
    @Idazmi7 3 года назад

    "Z-axis minus 10,000 meters, standby photon torpedoes."

  • @tobyharrison4702
    @tobyharrison4702 4 года назад +4

    My god this is a disaster. How am I supposed to purge the Xenos now!!??!!!

    • @theinquisitor8112
      @theinquisitor8112 4 года назад +1

      Point your ship up. Or add turrets that shoot up, silly boomer xeno.

  • @Ajc-ni3xn
    @Ajc-ni3xn 3 года назад +1

    “We now go to the project lead at the Voor technocracy”
    “Jesus Christ for the 65th time THERE IS NO UP IN SPACE!”

  • @woozyglint2127
    @woozyglint2127 4 года назад +2

    Would be like the (sea) navy having ships that could move side to side without having to turn...

  • @agbottan
    @agbottan 4 года назад +2

    Brilliant! Finest internal humour.

  • @RobbieForReal
    @RobbieForReal 4 года назад +1

    I absolutely love these news reports. Please keep reporting

  • @TESkyrimizer
    @TESkyrimizer 4 года назад +1

    This channel is severely underrated

  • @kerbodynamicx472
    @kerbodynamicx472 3 года назад +2

    The technology: RCS thrusters

  • @Raffinari
    @Raffinari 4 года назад +1

    Wow if only the emperor had this tech in the rise of skywalker

  • @IC1101-Capinatator
    @IC1101-Capinatator 3 года назад +3

    Finally, they realised Stellaris is 3D!

  • @SebHaarfagre
    @SebHaarfagre 2 года назад +2

    The Governors are pretty fast, too, as well as the envoys. Though I guess the scientists are much more tangible 😂

  • @wimpwampwomp
    @wimpwampwomp 3 года назад +1

    Welp
    *We now need a sequel to Flatland*

  • @arkadian2917
    @arkadian2917 10 месяцев назад

    "news from the frontlines: the spiritualists coalition is being stunningly defeated by Voor corvettes simply flying below their mastodontic battleships"

  • @3dgamer622
    @3dgamer622 4 года назад +3

    @Xenonion news
    Can you do news about stellaris invicta of the templin institute i love their stellaris series and about to have an upcoming invicta season 2

  • @cactuscraze4877
    @cactuscraze4877 4 года назад +2

    I thought they were adding up and down flight to stellaris...

  • @strossvaron
    @strossvaron 4 года назад +1

    Loved the scientist comment.

  • @szymonrozanski6938
    @szymonrozanski6938 2 года назад

    1:15 Yeah Paradox totally arent too lazy or just waiting to sell it as DLC.

  • @ferrusmanus4013
    @ferrusmanus4013 4 года назад +10

    Technophobia is the mark of ignorance

    • @harbl99
      @harbl99 4 года назад +4

      * laughs in robot uprising *

    • @FibroidAuto
      @FibroidAuto 4 года назад

      harbl99 robot uprising or any uprising are easy to deal with. That’s if you put a good amount of troops on every planet.

    • @marsar1775
      @marsar1775 4 года назад +1

      A closed mind is a safe mind

    • @FibroidAuto
      @FibroidAuto 4 года назад

      Serpy the Serpent true sometimes but a open mind is a wise mind.

    • @bronzejourney5784
      @bronzejourney5784 2 года назад

      @@marsar1775 Safe or scared?

  • @The_Goose2
    @The_Goose2 2 года назад +1

    What next are they going to try to leave the galaxy?! Just crazy.

  • @handsomeman-child8751
    @handsomeman-child8751 4 года назад +3

    This channel is my replacement for the Onion.

  • @spartadragonrider
    @spartadragonrider 4 года назад +2

    I feel like this is a callout on rise of skywalker...
    good

  • @marasmusine
    @marasmusine Год назад

    "Bordergore"? I've learned a new term!

  • @SugarRayD
    @SugarRayD 3 года назад +1

    Nav can't tell which way is up out there huh

  • @andersforsgren3806
    @andersforsgren3806 4 года назад +4

    Amazing, what will they think of next - war ships that need to decelerate flying with the engines first against the enemy that vaporize the enemy fleet with the exhaust before a single shot had been fired? Er no space gods forgive me for ever suggesting adding actual physics to any space game. :P

  • @nathangamble125
    @nathangamble125 3 года назад +1

    Impossible. Everyone knows space is 2D!

  • @simbachvazo6530
    @simbachvazo6530 3 года назад

    *Tonight on "How Its Made"*

  • @louisgentilucci1188
    @louisgentilucci1188 4 года назад +5

    May the ommissiah forbid it!! Hersey indeed! What's next, support buildings for rare resource production? Useful additions to star-base subsections? A FUNCTIONAL WARFARE MECHANIC?!?!?

  • @zipster6393
    @zipster6393 4 года назад +1

    Im not the one whos gonna break the news to those shipbuilding industries

  • @colinmerritt7645
    @colinmerritt7645 5 месяцев назад +1

    Nope. Until I see it above my homeworld with my own eyes, the z-axis is just a fairy tale.

  • @stevenlittrel2648
    @stevenlittrel2648 4 года назад +1

    ILL TAKE YOUR ENTIRE STOCK

  • @tnynfox1669
    @tnynfox1669 4 года назад +2

    If they keep doing their thing, we're gonna see them terraform the Galactic Core so anyone can live there regardless of biology.

  • @stefanwalicord
    @stefanwalicord 4 года назад +1

    The one dislike is an engineer who hates z axis

  • @stevenandersen6989
    @stevenandersen6989 4 года назад +1

    Hey News Network, not to complain or anything, but can we see some xeno sports?

  • @marginbuu212
    @marginbuu212 2 года назад +1

    Of course it's the Voor. Always playing with fire. Why can't the leave well enough alone?

  • @DRKILLIE
    @DRKILLIE 3 года назад +2

    i dont think stellaris knows how space works.

    • @Idazmi7
      @Idazmi7 3 года назад

      It's intelligent, but not experienced. It's pattern indicates two-dimensional thinking.

  • @huydo5229
    @huydo5229 4 года назад +1

    Next you'll tell me these ships can shoot at an angle

  • @atheisticgreyblob3284
    @atheisticgreyblob3284 3 года назад

    I wonder which faction will try to ban this technology in the Galactic Community next. 🙄

  • @badpiggies988
    @badpiggies988 3 года назад +1

    1:40 Darwin Award

  • @Violent2aShadow
    @Violent2aShadow 4 года назад +2

    Just wait until some joker discovers how to fly upside down.

  • @Spyderfarmerman
    @Spyderfarmerman 4 года назад +1

    Simulation inside of a simulation.

  • @AsbestosMuffins
    @AsbestosMuffins 3 года назад +1

    Lithoids "Land?"

  • @jacob7718
    @jacob7718 3 года назад +1

    FFS! as if there wasn't already too many critical engineering techs to worry about.

  • @KraliMishev
    @KraliMishev 4 года назад +1

    Fresh Meat

  • @tracksuitcheems
    @tracksuitcheems 4 года назад +1

    who down voted?

  • @lameshane1
    @lameshane1 4 года назад +1

    impossible!

  • @jamesperkins2552
    @jamesperkins2552 2 года назад +1

    3 spacial dimensions? When did the media start peddling pseudoscience? What's next? Stars are real? Necroids have rights? I'm not the most attractive being in the galaxy? This network might as well be a series of Ted Talks at this point.
    Commenter's note: while the comment above was a joke, I do actually feel that many Ted Talks are full of crap....Ok bye.

  • @playdoughmaster808
    @playdoughmaster808 2 года назад

    Has anyone else not played stelaris but still thinks these are funny

  • @dohminkonoha3200
    @dohminkonoha3200 3 года назад

    Flat galaxiers

  • @datastorm75
    @datastorm75 4 года назад +1

    Lies! Lies and space wizards!

  • @KouNagai
    @KouNagai 3 года назад

    Lol

  • @hydra7427
    @hydra7427 4 года назад +1

    Fake news.