Cursed Pick Up Lines

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  • Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
  • Today we look at some of the most cursed pick up lines. None of these made sense. You're all going to be alone forever. Get help. Also subscribe.
    Full Vod Here: @James Marriott VODs
    Edited by Matthew
    Recorded live on Twitch: / jamesmarriott
    Main Channel: / jamesmarriott
    Listen to Bitter Tongues here: ingrv.es/bitte...
    Spotify: open.spotify.c...

Комментарии • 289

  • @kitkatcatqueen4888
    @kitkatcatqueen4888 Год назад +1519

    I have witnessed a moment that will forever be written down in history. James slayed his first properly executed pun :0

  • @JackIves
    @JackIves Год назад +585

    the "cant-elope" pun is the cleverest pun you've ever done and the fact you didn't even prepare it makes it so much better.

  • @finnster3276
    @finnster3276 Год назад +20

    THAT CANTALOUPE JOKE IS A FAT W

  • @Heathee._.
    @Heathee._. Год назад +426

    Today I was with my friend and we were in complete silence. I suddenly just said, “I’m sad.” And my friend went, “oh, why?” I said, “I listen to James Marriotts music.” They said after a minute of silence, “oh.” The end.

  • @hexxed9140
    @hexxed9140 Год назад +411

    James video before a 12 hour shift makes it all worth it

  • @Dakota_The_Apollo_Kid
    @Dakota_The_Apollo_Kid Год назад +111

    I’m absolutely terrified by these😭😭

  • @ebeejeebes
    @ebeejeebes Год назад +46

    james marriott videos are always the fastest 10 minutes of my life

  • @wibbwobbles
    @wibbwobbles Год назад +15

    "Are you a Melon? cause Honeydew you look good.
    No I'm not because you Canteloupe with me" -James Marriott 2023

  • @JC-wi7vm
    @JC-wi7vm Год назад +22

    I genuinely hate having the name James thanks to only this video. "Hey is your name James? because I'll have you barking all night long" haunts my nightmares. I hate this. I'm changing my name.

  • @Nomad_Rook
    @Nomad_Rook Год назад +55

    James is too traumatised at this point lmao

  • @brydenbell9669
    @brydenbell9669 Год назад +95

    james posting makes my day 1000% better

  • @ChillWithTheRain
    @ChillWithTheRain Год назад +120

    I always love your videos man you never disappoint

  • @Skibbidy
    @Skibbidy Год назад +9

    james always sounds like he's about to cry

  • @SIeepyy_
    @SIeepyy_ Год назад +40

    i can’t wait to see the amount of cursed pickup lines in this video-😰

    • @r3myc0
      @r3myc0 Год назад +2

      There were some horrible ones not in the video.
      …I’m not even gonna type it.

  • @jaqsre
    @jaqsre Год назад +4

    video froze at 1:20 and i thought james was just very good at staying still like that

  • @ASecretWriter
    @ASecretWriter Год назад +13

    He didn’t get to my pickup line, so I’m putting it here:
    I’m great at math. You add the bed subtract the clothes divide the sheets and hope we don’t multiply 😉

  • @khaenriya
    @khaenriya Год назад +19

    the mississippi one was genuinely funny LMAOOO
    edit: nvm lost the funny after being repeated like 3 times

  • @elishawxo
    @elishawxo Год назад +20

    Thank you for making a pun out of my pickup line James, appreciate that one (ps mines the melon one)

  • @f0lkl0re222
    @f0lkl0re222 Год назад +18

    james suffered for us yet again 💀

  • @Glegh
    @Glegh Год назад +20

    If an uber sent me a pickup line, it'd be reasonable, but weird

  • @yetanotherinternetdisaster
    @yetanotherinternetdisaster Год назад +10

    sometimes i worry what we've done to him

  • @GalacticKayko_
    @GalacticKayko_ Год назад +1

    Dance British boy. No explanation. Just dance British boy

  • @katous_4360
    @katous_4360 Год назад +7

    I know someone that knew someone that went up to a girl at a bar, said "nice shoes wanna f!&k" and they got married three years later so maybe wanna bang could be a good pick up line if you used it on the right person 😂

  • @Queenxily
    @Queenxily Год назад +3

    5:15 Seeing James and everyone in chat not Know The Audio Meant To Go With This Line HURTS

  • @gwenedwards5108
    @gwenedwards5108 Год назад +1

    Oh gosh. Here we go

  • @just.ghost.
    @just.ghost. Год назад +12

    The more W’s, the more power he gets.

  • @KaiorKay
    @KaiorKay Год назад +2

    9:00 jokes on you I can’t even find myself

  • @jumbo-yb4qv
    @jumbo-yb4qv Год назад +1

    the " keep the Ws going" reminds me of the song that goes like
    " i live for the applause applause applause. ..i live for the appla-ause

  • @atlas_660
    @atlas_660 Год назад +3

    I definitely feel so bad for ‘missing’ these streams… yup

  • @jayimperium4198
    @jayimperium4198 Год назад +8

    Just putting it out there I told my boyfriend that “he could put my meat mountain in his moth” and I think thats the best thing I’ve ever said

  • @RandomBirdOnion
    @RandomBirdOnion Год назад +1

    I’m going on a James Marriott binge because I can’t sleep his content is so good

  • @bricky.wit.da.blicky
    @bricky.wit.da.blicky Год назад +5

    jimbos hair looking as full as ever 🤩

  • @Wermfare
    @Wermfare Год назад +2

    Car lights being more relatable than ever 🥲

  • @WeaverWarbles
    @WeaverWarbles Год назад +2

    I watched this stream and I watched it twice because once for the actual video and then the next for slowly playing and pausing the video to see how many times I made it on the video lmao

  • @Laurenyummy
    @Laurenyummy Год назад

    “Why do you call it an oven when you of in the cold food and of out hot eat the food?” Genius right there.

  • @AMirrorCat
    @AMirrorCat Год назад +1

    Watching James and then he posts

  • @Lilarella
    @Lilarella Год назад

    i love the new backdrop

  • @jax_firestorm9689
    @jax_firestorm9689 Год назад +4

    All these James-related pick-up lines are slightly uncomfy because my boyfriend of almost a year is named James and I am writing these down for later

  • @yesitsme5917
    @yesitsme5917 Год назад

    1:49 WHAT ? THERE IS NO WAY ! NO WAY THATS THE THING BEHIND IT THERE IS NO WAY
    I love this song 100 times more now

  • @charliethefroggy360
    @charliethefroggy360 Год назад +1

    The thumbnail sums up my life

  • @Mx._M_o_t_h
    @Mx._M_o_t_h Год назад +1

    Oh lord not bad pick up lines

  • @Alexjk425
    @Alexjk425 Год назад +2

    I want it, but can you slow down? Number one pickup line. Works every time.

  • @neva_136
    @neva_136 Год назад

    that pun was gold

  • @williamshakespere5745
    @williamshakespere5745 Год назад +1

    James your hair is looking mighty not-bald today.

  • @windowstechsupport3562
    @windowstechsupport3562 Год назад +1

    I can be Jessie, you Are James, and we could have our own Meowth together😉

  • @angelinaa676
    @angelinaa676 Год назад +1

    My favorite pickup line:
    Give me a daughter with your stubborn heart, or your even temper. Give our children your dark-bright eyes, or your enchanted smile. So that even when we are gone, the world will find within them all of the reasons why I loved you.

  • @KianStone._
    @KianStone._ Год назад +2

    Life advice for viewers !!
    Never, and I mean never drink while watching these streams

  • @kaslynwatches
    @kaslynwatches Год назад

    K so right after 5:00 I got an ad where this girl went
    "Why do I care so much that people like me?"
    Followed directly after with
    "I think I'm gay."
    I can't even-

  • @Mywifeleftme16
    @Mywifeleftme16 Год назад +1

    I love James’s videos

  • @joemamamamaooh
    @joemamamamaooh Год назад +1

    i always smile whenever you upload bro

  • @lizzyrodriguez146
    @lizzyrodriguez146 Год назад +1

    Yoooooo I love that sweater that you are wearing James!!!!!!!

  • @Itsmmikey
    @Itsmmikey Год назад +2

    I love your videos they always make me happy

  • @BeanZ013
    @BeanZ013 Год назад

    CONGRATS ON 400K!

  • @karoliina514
    @karoliina514 Год назад

    I opened this video and my browser immediately crashed, thanks James

  • @PRIVATE04-4
    @PRIVATE04-4 Год назад +1

    the suffering

  • @multi_pines_cos
    @multi_pines_cos Год назад +3

    I am supposed to be asleep... Yet I am here.
    Edit:
    *James, saying no one plays among us anymore*
    *Me, looking at the app on my phone* Yeah totally..

  • @ameenaosman5109
    @ameenaosman5109 Год назад +1

    James I literally love you

  • @hulacat1555
    @hulacat1555 Год назад +1

    home alone overnight for the first time? check! got some yummy ass pizza? check! cute dog and cat to snuggle? check! new james marriott video? check! perfect evening :)

  • @MEGANLOVESURMUM
    @MEGANLOVESURMUM Год назад

    You deserve so many more subscribers

  • @ornirimichomosexual9083
    @ornirimichomosexual9083 Год назад +1

    james u look dashing 2day

  • @Lily-zr9bi
    @Lily-zr9bi Год назад +1

    My friend said the other day that she would smash our teacher and for some reason this video made me think of it

  • @finnster3276
    @finnster3276 Год назад

    his sweater is so swag ill steal it off his back

  • @eli53729
    @eli53729 Год назад

    This is more cursed than the doll in the corner of my room who likes to scratch me while sleeping

    • @cynister7384
      @cynister7384 Год назад

      That's just a cat

    • @eli53729
      @eli53729 Год назад

      @@cynister7384 see you’d like to think that but it’s my great grandmothers from the 70s

  • @kristiliqua
    @kristiliqua Год назад +1

    6:38 bro where tf is pest control i think there's a mouse in here 💀💀
    oh nvm i think it was the window cleaner wiping the windows

  • @clouxyisdead5468
    @clouxyisdead5468 Год назад

    I might use some of these

  • @cynister7384
    @cynister7384 Год назад

    That was actually such a good pun

  • @p3t3ls31
    @p3t3ls31 Год назад +1

    James finally made his 1st actual pun!!!1!

  • @r3myc0
    @r3myc0 Год назад

    I couldn’t finish watching this due to a tornado warning. In the end though, I got like 5 chats in the final video so I’m good. 2 were just lol though.

  • @t.doig07
    @t.doig07 Год назад

    YIPPEE!!! NEW JAMES MARRIOTT LIVE VIDEO!!!!

  • @pixelixxel
    @pixelixxel Год назад +2

    You like Lego, right? Wanna see my LEGO Brick 32557?
    I like Lego, you like Lego, let's build up a relationship!

  • @Pumkingirl2007
    @Pumkingirl2007 Год назад

    8:09 rare James American accent moment

  • @Samwasfound404
    @Samwasfound404 Год назад +1

    Thank you James for suffering for our happiness🫶🏻😔

  • @harlanlewis1999
    @harlanlewis1999 Год назад

    i swear to god this man is one of the funniest people on the internet

  • @edenback4064
    @edenback4064 Год назад +2

    My mum walked in at 7:08 when he made a jb joke and said it was "so untoward"

  • @w0rm583
    @w0rm583 Год назад

    not james saying "I don't do this for free..."

  • @oliverse_crazy930
    @oliverse_crazy930 Год назад +1

    I'm still not used to the new background lmao

  • @elizaribbons
    @elizaribbons Год назад +1

    hello james mariott

  • @jellorbs495
    @jellorbs495 Год назад

    You won't find me, I'll find you

  • @revolutionarycat139
    @revolutionarycat139 Год назад

    Awesome vid man

  • @officialblimp
    @officialblimp Год назад

    4:48 A MCFREAK LMAO

  • @tommo3521
    @tommo3521 Год назад

    this man is always suffering 💀

  • @e4adc9
    @e4adc9 Год назад

    8:35 WHATS LOVE IF ITS NOT TRUEE

  • @Jack_breadloafffff
    @Jack_breadloafffff Год назад

    The only thing I can think of during the live stream:
    SHEEEEEEEEEEESH

  • @Plonker_Productions
    @Plonker_Productions Год назад

    This was probably a hour long stream and he only laughed 4 times this really shows something 😂

  • @sarah-os2em
    @sarah-os2em Год назад

    Yay I'm traumatised 🤗

  • @hiolettelane-williams7465
    @hiolettelane-williams7465 Год назад

    OUR JIMBO.

  • @hiiiskzz
    @hiiiskzz Год назад

    I have one... (keep in mind this is after the first line so idk the others-) "Do you have a bandaid? cause i scraped my knee falling for you.." (also im gay so i just wanted to tell mine im not a simp i swear. you are a streamer that i watch not an obbsesion :) )

  • @bereniceschmitt5668
    @bereniceschmitt5668 Год назад +1

    James you look so good!!!

  • @maitiug
    @maitiug Год назад +1

    Wayyy new setup

  • @dayzs06
    @dayzs06 Год назад

    Yay James posted!

  • @athorashadow
    @athorashadow Год назад

    The Mississippi one is a meme I saw it on a raccoon meme

  • @fw_asiya
    @fw_asiya Год назад

    James got all the rizz

  • @rezmez-ft2hm
    @rezmez-ft2hm Год назад

    love the video mate

  • @ExplodingSteve
    @ExplodingSteve Год назад

    2:25 i agree with that statement

  • @rae3944
    @rae3944 Год назад +1

    Hello! You’re back here too? Dang 😔

  • @Alexjk425
    @Alexjk425 Год назад +1

    James Marriott? I sure hope it does.

  • @ItzButteredToast
    @ItzButteredToast Год назад

    Bros trauma tho

  • @ClemCraftMC
    @ClemCraftMC Год назад +1

    Me after just getting prime for the first time...
    And I see this

  • @rej1969
    @rej1969 Год назад

    cursed but enjoyable

  • @Gxroos
    @Gxroos Год назад

    IM TERRIFIED