This is hands down my favorite part of rotating hosts. Desi always brings great conversations around gender, and we're actually getting such a cool variety of perspectives with the guests.
Scott Galloway makes similar arguments, but Reeves does it in a less abrasive manner and provides some hope for change. His ability to use humor to explain the problem makes the message more receptive to others IMO.
His more serious framing is just as effective as his humor in disinfecting the taboo that has grown over this issue, and giving others a better way to discuss it as well. I applaud him as well!
Different audiences. Reeves will move TDS listeners/educated but won’t appeal to the podcast crowd and doesn’t have a whole lot of blue collar appeal. It’s educated and you can see him doing a bunch of positioning before delivering perhaps critical statements. Right now men are reacting against this type of speaking. That’s Galloway’s utility and there’s a danger in criticizing the messengers too much that we miss the point.
@@azzers214 This is a message directed as much to women as to men, to the blue collar as much as to the white collar. There is a need for different messengers to get the message across.
A really important point that he made that needs repeating is the if we don't address young men's issues in a responsible way, then irresponsible people will address them. People like Andrew Tate. And we don't want that.
It's not only that they don't get addressed. That would be bad enough. Reeves is right when he says that it's a prevalent belief that "men don't have problems." And it's nice to hear him speak up about "toxic masculinity". It's a made up thing meant to denigrate men and boys, the same way"hysterical" used to be applied to women.
just feels like we are asking women and all the ptsd from all the assualt to be stepped aside and turn the other cheek and understand. he wants us to care about men but without accountability for the harm caused that part i don't know how to square. I have been assualted so many times... its exhausting. only ONE of those times was it a guy i actually was dating. Every other time was a colleague in a work place ... sigh
@@LafemmebearMusic That's not what he's saying at all. People are capable of addressing two different issues at the same time. We can care about men's issues while at the same time caring about women's issues. He never said that men who assault women shouldn't be held accountable.
@@LafemmebearMusicyou’re the one saying those words. The first part of his mansplaining was about the fact that taking on this issue is not diminishing the other issues. It’s almost as if you didn’t watch or listen to the part that 2 things can be true at the same time.
The problem has been identity politics. We can't lump all men together, or all women - or all black men, asian women, etc. In every group, there are those that are doing just fine, those that need help, and those that are causing the problems.
This is such a brilliant conversation. What a brave, powerful and productive posture to take on this issue. Our society would benefit from a willingness to have more important hard conversations like this with openness and levity.
This was a pathetic conversation - a man looking weak and scared of being called out by a feminist, while saying not to blame feminists, while also blaming feminists. Seriously now? What's happened to men that the only ones I see in media are rage-fulled idiots, creepy weirdos, or those scared of shadows? hbomberguy, folding ideas, and shaun are all more impressive men and trying to provide a positive way forwards for men in the 21st century.
Yes, and this is only the surface, he doesn't really get into the ways the struggles of men and woman are different. For example, men are taught to be guarded with their emotions their whole lives, making therapy a much more difficult road. Women are making economic strides today nurtured with mass support, over decades of fighting for their rights, and that's great. Traditionally a man's role is to carry a heavy burden by standing strong without support. As the barriers between genders soften, men need more support to equalize that balance.
Yeah, like just a short while ago before the election. You would be attacked and called all kinds of names for supporting men. Wonder why the blue team lost?
Yes! I was floored to hear the exposition.... Richard does a very very cautious tightrope walk. I've read about the crazy rate of suicide among men, it's horrible.... and calling men (derogatory term) for seeking mental health counseling.... this needs to be talked about, and you're 100% right that not too long ago this would have been impossible... but isn't it still??? "Men don't have problems, men are the problem." I'm curious if there's any fallout from this book and interview.... we shall see.
To the person who just asked if I was reporting their comments, no. I'm getting the notificating that you're leaving the comment, but by the time I get to RUclips to respond, it's already gone.
It only took Jordan Peterson, Andrew Tate & Trump getting reelected to see liberals talking about this. That's 10yrs worth of right-wing influences capturing male minds bc they recognized an easy opening. Sincerely though I find this conversation incredibly frustrating because it's so, so long overdue. I've watched political narratives for 10yrs on these issues like they were a time bomb and they were. If liberal politics embraced masculinity and could talk about these issues perhaps there would be stronger liberal or moderate male voices to counteract Trumpism. But no.., it's all toxic until democrats got stomped in the last election and here we are. Too little too late. This situation of genders at odds with each other is going to take generations to unwind and will have serious economic, political & social repercussions affecting EVERYONE.
Such an important conversation. As a mom of a boy and a girl, I’ve seen how boys have odds stacked against them in school early on - like in kindergarten. That does not diminish the challenges I know my daughter faces. The struggles of boys (and men) deserve to be heard and seen. Leave it to the Daily Show to bring important convos to the forefront. Bravo.
I'm genuinely glad you appreciate the importance of the convo, but this conversation has been happening for a while now. The Daily Show is a bit behind the curve overall, but perhaps a bit early for left leaning sources? In fact the topic has generally been met with hostility and scorn from the left. A lot of that comes from the vibe flawed messengers from the men's movement give off and its taken a Richard Reeves with his very diplomatic and agreeable presentation to speak the things that others have been saying for a while.
Great conversation. I will definitely read this book. One big thing not addressed regarding the lack of men entering teaching: the paltry salary and lack of respect too many Americans have for the dedicated people doing this crucially important work.
That's in large part due to teaching and most things related to caring being deemed "women's work" aka not work, not valuable, and not deserving of high renumeration.
... Had lots of male teachers growing up in 60s-70s We men are told our value is based upon our income and social status. There is a reason the girls chase after the Rockstar and not the guy working in the concession stand.
I wanted to raise the same issue- we have devalued careers that have become more seen as “women’s work”, ie care fields- teaching, social work as two obvious examples- and the salaries have fallen relative to male-dominated fields. If we want more men teaching, we have to value education more and fund it a heck of a lot more so we can pay teachers more attractive salaries!
I feel like he is the best or at least the most diplomatic at talking about this stuff - which is important because if you don't have basically a perfectly fair frame around anything gender related many people will rush to stop listening and retreat to their own flawed and biased perspectives about us versus them, etc.
Honesrly, kinda disagree. The man has to bend over backwards to be the most diplomatic and inclusive of women's issues at all times. This IS a comedy interview, obviously, so the comedic exaggeration and silliness from Desi is on brand... but can you REALLY imagine women's issues needing so much extra context? I've been discussing gender politics and men's rights online for around a decade. Things are WAY better now than they used to be... but some accountability should really be taken by feminists. THe man here very diplomatically suggestred that the refusal to talk about these issues left a vacuum. There was no "refusal" there was outright hostility. I watched as men's issues were VERY successfully taken over by the right wing, who offer no solutions and are objectively worse in every metric for men, while the left cheered it on. Last election was (hopefully) a wakeup call. But some of us have been sounding the alarm for YEARS. And being called every name you can imagine for it. Just remember the rhetoric about "Bernie bros" Look up "self made man" by Norah Vincent (and how little traction it got) Look up Cassie Jaye's "the red pill" Folks have been trying for a long time to point out the flaws in gender politics discussions. It really hasn't been men who are unwilling to listen or compromise.
@@DmGray I here you completely. I am a woman and I wouldn't call myself a feminist but I obviously have a stronger lean towards women's issues. However, what i've recognised is that academic conversations are great and very necessary, but in the real lives of women many things haven't changed for the better. Some of those women are then chronicaly online discussing their personal issues and seeing EVERYTHING through the lens of their personal trauma and woe betide you if you fail to disagree with that narrative. Women's issues become popular and lucrative both financially and socially and generate a type of cultural capital that become addictive because it feeds the vindication of the aforementioned personal traumas. It's actually a hot mess! This then does leave a massive void for those with nefarious purposes to swoop in and pick up the boys and men who feel left behind and have no other framework other than the Andrew Tates of teh world to figure out how to be. We NEED to have these converstaions, all of us, but we need to have them from a place of understanding that sits outside of our persoanl traumatic experiences otherwise the listening will never take place and nothing will ever get better. BUT, it's because of all of that framing and the long history of female subjugation why I totally understand the necessity for Reeves to be so diplomatic. He won't be heard if he isn't.
@@DmGray I couldn't really follow your position, like the other poster said I'm not sure where you were disagreeing. But on the point of the politicization of these issues I'm not a fan of the deafening rage around gender politics. It's impossible to not get offended no matter where you land in the quagmire of online hot takes. Republicans and corporations take advantage them as talking points and distract from earth shifting issues like the environment and the ultra wealthy.
@@DmGray even through a comedic lens, it seemed to me as if Desi Lydic was pushing back a little much, which, ya know, in hindsight is fine (I think there was some actual tension when Reeves called her out on womansplaining his own book to him lol) Given the choice I’d always prefer an interviewer to be critical regardless of the topic rather than swallow, smile, nod, applaud.
Yeah, if I remember HIStory correctly, there are a lot of cultures that did really well even when woman were bound to the house, like in the birthplace of democracy: Athens. So, no don't like the argument. But do wholeheartedly believe in a world of freedom, peace and prosperity for all.
What? Women have only had the vote for 100 years, women just lost the right to control their own bodies but sure, we all rise together. SMH that this whining is topical.
@@emilyoud5190 Right, but there are also a lot of cultures "that did really well" with a fascist rule/dictatorship. But that is because no democracy existed. I wrote a way to big text...But basically: There in history has been women in incredible position of power, truthfully deciding everything from their own economy, to living alone in entire sections of society (not only rich or family connections, or whatever else technicality, but truthfully deciding their own lives). The past 100 years or so, is not the first time women were able to decide what happens to society (should be rather obvious, women are not sheep or toys that suddenly woke up 100 years ago). The only place that still practice that is Indonesia, because the laws and society reflected to equally improve society for men and women. When men and women are not happy together, there is no future for either party, which is mostly dangerous for women. -Even if you have a certain hate for men, or expecting men to be on top at all times, it would be the best play, to care for men, like men cares for women.- (And by men caring for women, I obviously mean that most red pilled guys, used to be feminist in some capacity, and the men that are pointing out women difficulties. Even at the start of this story (America) men where the ones who went out there, to promote women to vote and work/become independent.
Grew up in the 50's. Teacher was one profession women COULD be without a lot of hassle. I had mostly female teachers for 12 years--two male teachers. This conversation was eye opening to me. Think I need to learn more about this issue. Thank you
This is a conversation that fathers and mothers, needed to have with thier sons, about 45 years ago. Societal change starts from within the home, always. Ideals are passed generationally. Learn this one particular trait from your grandfather (because he does --- well) but also this other trait from your sister (because she does --- better than others) ...as a child and teen you need multiple examples to learn from in order to find the balance later on in life, of a semi-well adjusted person.
@TheEvolver311 You're absolutely right, I won't try to argue against that. But I did say 45 years ago and that would've been when one earner households were still quite common. Never the less, this is one big reason in how we got here. As distracted, tired, unwilling parents unengaged with their children and teaching the nuanced things about themselves that nor school or friendships couldn't. Working tirelessly paycheck to paycheck is super rough, been there...but as a parent, you don't (or *shouldn't) have a choice but to also put energy into your children. A lot of people used that as an excuse and now we have a generation of men that have no awareness of what it means to be positive influence in masculinity....and so they looked elsewhere; and found a false representation of manhood in a spray tan diety.
Hard to take lessons from your male role models when they don't exist. Too many kids in single mother households. Zero decent male role models in the entertainment media that kids are watching these days. There's no more Mr. Rogers. Now it's Mr. Beast. And dad can't make up for it because mom wasn't even married, or got a divorce because the marriage was "boring".
I was lucky my parents raised my brother and I as equals, but as typical girl and boy of the late 1970's, never thought of his problems as any less important as mine. didn't grow up in USA either, seemed weird to me that some brothers didn't see their sisters as equals, some even saw each other as some do today as an enemy to be tricked.
Watch Trevor Noah’s interview with Jennette McCurdy! Whether serious or satire, The Daily Show is just always top-tier when it comes to their interviews
Yes! We need more men in education, but one reason men don’t go into education is because they are taught that they are supposed to be the main bread winner while the woman stays home and takes care of the family, but a teacher is not paid enough to support a single income family, so teachers are there to supplement their husband’s income. I am a teacher and the majority of male teachers are those who have a wife who makes more money. Also, teaching is not a respected profession in America-it’s considered baby sitting and the Right has been attacking teachers for years, so because of sexism, pink professions are low paid and not respected, and that is not a draw for men. I am a teacher so I can be a mom and have to same schedule as my children. But, yes, I love having male teachers at my school and I wish there were more and I wish that people respected teachers.
I was startled when he mentioned wages falling for men. I had to stop the video and look up declining wages for males, what I found was yes, the male wage rates declining the following text in the quotation marks is from Brooking Institute 3-4-2011 "Have Earnings Actually Declined?" "The median wage of the American male has declined by almost $13,000 after accounting for inflation in the four decades since 1969. This is a reduction of 28 percent!" Remember this statement is from 2011, so this 2011 money.
Love Desi on the daily show!!! Amazing interviewer and comedian. And generally insightful and empathetic person. Thank you for being on the daily show ❤
One thing that would help is to bring back unstructured play in kindergarten. When I was in a child in the 60s-70s, there was no homework in kindergarten. We played, we learned stuff, but mostly we experimented with toys and crafts and had to negotiate our social relationships with each other-boys and girls alike. We still learned our ABCs and the beginnings of how to read and numerate, no problem. I can't believe what I hear from parents today about their 5-year-olds having homework. Play builds social skills and a sense of confidence around self-efficacy (how you can affect external conditions and create change in what surrounds you successfully).
The bigger issue is that kids never play without adult supervision anymore. That's abusive to our children's development. The biggest part of early socializing if learning how to cooperate and work out your disagreements with each other, not with parents refereeing at all times. Parenting has gone off the rails in this country.
Worked with men for 20 years and have been saying this for years. Men need help to see their role as men since it has been changing since the end of WWII. Yes, we need men teachers, need incentives!
Loved the bit about men in education. I may not be a classroom teacher but I do teach after school and it can be just as important. My job is more than just hanging out with kids. It's leaading club and activities and teaching those activities. Very intresting segment.
Regarding education and male teachers - I agree that we need more. And I also feel this shift was also due to men leaving fields that were not as prestigious. The teacher of the "old days" is often represented as a drill sergeant figure. Strict and authoritative. Now that teaching is more creative, caring and psychology based - these qualities are associated with women, and some men do not chose to pursue this career. Also i think salaries are a big issue. No one wants to take a stressful and poorly compensated job, but women have a bit higher tolerance to these factors, I think. So my (not very scientific) conclusion is that teaching needs to be a prestigious and an economically sound career option for more men to return.
It's not the salaries (though poor salaries don't help), in other countries that pay teachers very well (e.g. Canada & nordic countries) the gender gap among teachers is the same.
Its sad that this is somehow a win. People are killing themselves, but we have to first talk about how we respect women, before we can talk about the problem.... its sad really. And the jokes are completely inappropriate
@@timblank4432 I wish I understood some of that criticism you mention. It makes zero sense to me, unless it’s folks trolling (which I doubt, but would actually prefer, in this case).
@methodsocratic There was some trolling, then some people missing that the jokes are the MO of the show, Desi trolls the author and the author is rational. Then some doubting the author’s accuracies and arguments, and that it took too long to talk about this, which is just part of the conversation. Then the usual comments that missed the point or weren’t listening.
@p382742937423y4 The jokes is just how the show works, the host trolls and the author makes sense. Again back to the point of the author’s, we can care about both the suicide / mortality rate of men and men’s issues and respect women at the same time. It’s not zero sum, even though some may want to frame it as that.
I disagree, most can and do. They’re just to afraid to say it out loud. They addressed this in the interview, you weren’t allowed to talk about men’s issues because people would jump down your throat and call you sexist. Fear of social repercussions has halted many important conversations. Remember how shocked people were when Jon went on Colbert and basically said the lab leak theory was true? Nobody was allowed to say that at the time, RUclips channels being shut down, being banned from Twitter. Now it’s the leading theory and has basically been confirmed. We all knew deep down but we were all silenced by the freaks who somehow equated it with racism.
Most people would be capable of thinking, if they tried, but most people are not motivated to think. It's so easy in modern society to just reproduce and consume without thinking.
If you think for ONE SECOND men don't believe it's a competition, you've been duped. You're falling for one of the oldest tricks in the book. Tell YOUR team they need to do anything to win, tell your competition that 'hey, this is not a competition, you really need to be more collaborative and empathetic' and then guilt them for trying to win.
@FishareFriendsNotFood972 Nice rant about team competition you have there. Has nothing to do with a gender defending the other gender concerning inequality. Maybe go start your own thread?
@FishareFriendsNotFood972 Nice rant about team competition you have there. Has nothing to do with the male gender defending the female gender against inequality. Have a nice day.
Hey, more men in teaching? up the pay scale for all teachers and stop disrespecting teachers by calling out parents who defend their kid’s bad behavior.
as a former male teacher, the idea that you need a "second income" to make it work is so pervasive. Even the men talk about their bread-winning wives a lot. Which is fine, but like, why does teaching have to be the secondary income job for a man or a woman?
Yes, but also that's not how society works. Gender-biases are so entrenched in society that pay follows gender rather than the other way round. Teachers are poorly paid because it is a women-dominated career, IT jobs are well paid because it is a male-dominated career, when the gender-balance of these fields was reverse so was the pay. We need to have the really hard conversation if we actually want to fix things rather than pointing fingers at each other. Just take a moment to think about why is nursing and teaching female-dominated while doctors and university professors are male-dominated? Because it is all about the societial perception of "caring", caring is associated with women and vehemently not men so careers involving caring for others are seen as women's work. The decline of men in teaching closely parallels the shift from teachers as disciplinarians to teachers as nurturers of student potential. So, if we want to reverse the trend, what do we do? Do we go back to allowing teachers to spank students? Or do we teach men that they can be nurturers too?
Great conversation. Let's not forget that kindergarten is now what first or even second grade used to be 30 years ago. There's no "learning through play" in public schools anymore thanks to endless testing. This hurts boys more than girls.
We want equal footing for men and women. That's what feminism is supposed to be about. Although he doesn't like the term "toxic masculinity", that's what causes men to not want to seek mental health care and to talk about their problems bc having emotions is seen as "weak". I hope more men will pursue careers in education and psychiatry and psychology so other men feel more comfortable going for help.
You get it. It caused a cognitive dissonance in me. I tried to support your movement until I felt it was out to turn the tables, not to level the playing field. Sneaky, sneaky...
@@FishareFriendsNotFood972 you the reaso nthe left will never wi nagain if they keep putting the women have it worst or blacks have it worst mentality the truth is YOU DONT YOU JUST HAVE DIFFERENT ISSUES.
This concept of addressing more than one problem at a time is something that comes up in so many things. "Care for vets before aid to Ukraine", "no more homelessness before student loan forgiveness." We have always been able to tackle multiple problems at the same time until some decided to take issues and vilify one side by deflecting to some other issue.
I'm curious if his book and/ or other works go more into plausible causes for the decline in ratio of men succeeding in upper secondary and tertiary schools and ratio of men working in primary and secondary education. I wouldn't be surprised if they are highly tied to the declining working conditions for teachers and from there have become a vicious feedback loop. I, myself, was a teacher for years and got pushed out by the combination of non-living income and toxic work environments.
In Canada, we used equity hiring to promote male teachers in the younger grades in the 90s so male applicants are chosen over female applicants. Also, in Canada, teachers are well-paid. We improved the ratio somewhat but male teachers just aren't as interested in teaching younger students. And it didn't make a big difference in educational outcomes for young men.
@@prof.jezebel Yup, it's not just the practicalities, it is the culture and perception of the career. Teaching has been reframed in the cultural mindset into a "nurturing" job rather than a "disciplinarian" job which lines up with the gender expectations: women == nurturing, men == disciplinarian. Since society punishes men who do not adhere to masculine expectations, men choose to avoid nurturing-associated careers. Feminists have been talking about these problems for years - it's where the whole toxic masculinity thing comes from. But men seem to just want to blame the feminists for the problem rather than, you know, actually try to fix it.
I’m retired now but being a man in elementary education in a regular classroom is incredibly difficult. Being the first in my area I had to be better than everyone else. I had to be for the next guy to come in and get an opportunity. You can also add the facts that I wasn’t from the area or had the correct religious beliefs. I didn’t think those things would matter but I found out quickly they did. In all the years I taught there it didn’t change. In the last eight years it got worse. I must close by saying I would still do it again. It was worth it for me.
@@Blackshadow164 Woke isn't dead - because there will always be educated people who know our history and how this country was built - the promise of America is for all Americans - not just you
I really appreciate this interview and am going to read this book. This topic is close to my heart because of a mental health related loss of someone close to me. Thank you for sharing.
Richard Reeves is spot on with the men feeling left out of the conversations of people who are struggling. Every single Democrat politician should watch this video. I speak as a man who is on the left and I see how the right gets so many men to go to their side. The right acknowledges men and many of their struggles right now in the world, but then they place blame on the wrong people and the wrong things. The right is dominating the political podcast space, because of their outreach to young men. The left has done very little outreach at all for young men. Unless your a man of color, or a woman, your problems don't matter. Its so FRUSTRATING that the idiots in charge of the Democrat party don't see what's happening. Its exactly what Reeves said. You can advocate for better policies for women AND AT THE SAME TIME acknowledge that men have been having a real hard time too. If the left continues to ignore the male loneliness epidemic they will continue to loose young men to the likes of Andrew Tate, and all the idiots at the Daily Wire.
And exactly what do you propose that politicians do about this loneliness epidemic? Acknowledge it? And then what? What solution do YOU think would work?
profoundly even, care to explain? I would guess higher pay would just attract more ppl, including men. Maybe "on average", men prioritize higher pay more than women? I have no clue, I don't have actual stats, but if that is true, than it is not that profoundly ignorant I would think?
Let me get this, women should expect less pay and that is why they are willing to be teachers? Grossly entitled. And in many places teachers make will close to 100 K.
@@MatthewTheWanderer He didn't say there weren't a lot of men in education. There is a gender gap, and if we want to attract more men, then the reputation for low pay for hard work is not helping. There may be other reasons, but it's not the ignorant, sexist, worst comment of all time like you are making it out to be. Do you think increased teacher pay wouldn't bring male interest to the field?
Great message, Professor Galloway has a lot of similar videos on the subject, he is also visiting the sort of podcasts that need to hear this, so thanks for amplifying it.
This is the problem with EVERYTHING! No one wants to talk nuance, they just like using the word. But when we talk reality and solutions, everyone is like "Well, we can only try to eat this soup with a butter knife or a hamster, those are the only options" and not a single word of discussion can be had within a group as to why something about it is wrong. Its insane.
I am deeply saddened by seeing woman victimized. With that said, it was infuriating to be treated as someone less than human and not worthy of compassion. My paycheck was more important than anything else I had to offer my Family. Watching my Family disintegrate over the last 5 years has been heart breaking. I hope to have a relationship with my children as they grow into adulthood. Victimhood is no path I wish on anyone.
It is unfortunately the path being taught to youth. How many intersectionalities can you rack up to be ‘more oppressed’ and therefore get more privilege. If you haven’t seen it, there is a hilarious RUclips video mocking it called ‘modern education’ by Neil kahatar.
Wow. If *only* Jon had encouraged this frankness on TWS late last year. Just watch the last several minutes of that episode: it’s a picture-perfect example of people treating this topic as a zero-sum competition between men & women, as if addressing either issue mutually excludes the other.
The episode was a bit lackluster, I agree. The stuff they ended up talking about was interesting as well, but it wasn't what they were supposed to talk about.
My thoughts exactly, I was really hopeful when seeing the topic for that episode of the weekly show and came out of it incredibly disappointed, I am really glad that Richard Reeves was asked to come onto the daily show for this interview, it was exactly what I wish the podcast episode had actually touched on.
It’s an important discussion and I’ve read the book but I wish it was more solution-focused than recitation of statistics and the problem statement. If Biden promotes more women in STEM and women also have the natural tailwind of pursuit of/desiring education, there is synchronicity. If there was a push for more male teachers, but men have declining education outcomes, there is a headwind inherently in developing more male teachers. Where I live, there are more volunteers that sign up to become BigSisters than BigBrothers…how do you make men also care more about mentoring men?
That's a a great question, and the hardest part. First is identifying and talking about the issue. It's taken decades for women to get recognized over many fronts, over a century if you go back to woman's suffrage and the right to vote. I believe the younger generation growing up today have a new perspective on gender, but the current political turmoil complicates my hope for the future. I found an old video with Richard Reeves talking about his HEAL acronym, a male version of women in STEM: Health, Education, Administration and Literacy. That's really stuck with me, since I saw it two years ago. I didn't realize it was the same author on the same book until I found the video, but I'll link it anyway. ruclips.net/video/DBG1Wgg32Ok/видео.html
There is one fairly simple metric that I'd be interested in seeing someone research and attempt to measure: What happens when boys have access to more adult male role models through their life where these men are modeling *virtuous* aspects of masculinity? Where are there "cool" examples of this in media? For example, confidently fixing things or helping/rescuing/protecting others, or successfully providing mentoring, skills and physical/social resources (not just money) that enable others (including women). This is why male teachers are important, but also why boys (and all people!) need access to "third place" institutions like we used to have. Clubs, religious communities, civic organizations, recreational sports, volunteering etc. were places where boys could see various types of masculinity in action. You don't get this by watching superhero movies alone. Boys also need to see men contributing in loving, committed relationships, so they can see what the reward might be there. Most boys aren't exposed to men in their communities in this way anymore; they see men consuming, being entertained, possibly not working, or simply not around. We all need role models to see what's possible, what the choices are, and how these might play out.
Suspicion is routinely cast on men who work with children. This has been going on for decades and needs to stop. That's where the problem lies. It's the real reason there are so few men teaching young kids, even though it seems to be the women teachers who keep getting into trouble with their students.
Men who work with children have been put under suspicion. That has been going on since the 1980's, which was when the decline started happening. Nobody wants to talk about that, so they blame it on low pay.
Try to imagine addressing problems of racism with something like "How do you make Black people care about being successful and mentoring other Black people?"
She does seem to do a little bit more listening. Why ask an expert to come on, if the host is going to interrupt with an extended exposition of Their Own position? A brief question could have been all that was necessary to address an objection to that the audience might have.
as a guy who was lucky enough to learn about the concept of “toxic masculinity” in a way I could get behind it, Reeves makes a great argument against using the term, even if it does describe things that must be discussed.
Ditch the sociological term privilege while we're at it. Freedom from discrimination and feeling othered isn't a privilege to be taken away from some but a right that should be accorded to everyone.
An extremely important conversation. Very late to the table though (about 30 years at least imo). Lets hope main stream media continue to discuss this very real and serious crisis.
I read his book back in 2022, and I've been recommending it ever since. He is right: there are a lot people who aren't ready to have the conversations he talks about, but they are critical ones to have if we want our society to improve. Shoutout to bell hooks who wrote "The Will To Change" 20 years ago and spoke on having more empathy for male suffering as well!
Of boys and men is the best peice of media i have consumed on gender issues, ever. Could not recommend it enough if you have even a passing interest in the subject!
YES YES YES. IM SOOSOSOSOSOO HAPPY YOURE GIVING THIS MAN A PLATFORM.!,!! Of boys and men is such a great book! It really really needs to be taken seriously. Even if not all his solutions vibes with you, knowledge the problems he writes about NEED to be spread!!!
This is why young men are gravitating to the right wing. I am a male and a feminist, but I am also aware of toxic femininity. It works both ways. Gender is a spectrum and we treat it as it is a polar term.
Are you a feminist? You should probably know toxic feminist, the type that actually hate men, are rare and actual feminists want nothing to do with them.
Ooof.... kudos to them both for tackling a very fraught topic. It's hard to talk about the needs and troubles of men in this time and age.... but I'd say that toxic masculinity impacts men in a lot of horrible ways. Thanks for stepping up and giving it a shot, Desi and Richard.
Let's be honest: "toxic masculinity" is not used in its academic form, it's used as an insult. It's an insult based on the gender one was assigned at birth. Calling men "toxic" stops dialog. You can't have meaningful conversations after insults are thrown around. Do not use the term toxic masculinity. Ever. If you want the academic equivalent talk about "internalized misandry" and the hatred of men who dare defy traditional gender roles.
I very much agree. I’ve spent the last 20ish years in academia and have studied some of the thinkers and texts that influenced and inspired the modern radical left. More than anything else I’ve learned that they are *highly* specialised and cannot be understood without a comprehensive knowledge of philosophy, sociology and psychology (at the very least). When laypeople (for want of a better term) start throwing around terms like ‘structural prejudice’ or ‘internalised patriarchy’ (etc.) they rarely understand the history of these terms, their existence as responses to previous ideas, and most of all that they are ideas and not practical methodologies.
It's all and only the rich fault. Period... People from every race, creed, culture, gender are struggling 100% because of the RICH... Share their wealth, problem solved, it's not easy but it's that simple yes! 100%
Yet instead of blaming the men and women of the capitalist class, so many people pretend like it's men who are the oppressors. That's part of why young men shifted right: they see wealthy families exploit men for profit (especially with military drafts) and then hear insane theories about how it's men's fault. Blame the rich not the men.
I completed 2 Elementary teacher education programs. In my first cohort of 30 teachers in training there were 2 men. In my 2nd cohort of 50 there was only 2 men. Yes, recruiting young men to go into education, especially at the Elementary level should be a priority.
I normally like her, but the start of this conversation was extremely annoying. To minimize real issues with the tiny violin conversation was unbelievable. Let men minimize women problems and they would be out of a job. There are very real issues that men are facing in today’s culture.
As a teacher, I find the last bit interesting. There is an argument that teaching has become less prestigious as it has become less male. This isn’t a men vs. women issue. This is a patriarchy issue. Perhaps if teaching became respected, manageable, and well-paid, more men would join the profession. In the meantime, the many women who are already teachers would benefit.
Men opt out of professions once a certain percentage of women are in them. (I think it's 40%) This ALL entirely stems from a culture that teaches boys the WORST thing they could do is act like a girl. Unless we stop villainizing women and start seeing all humans as full-spectrum people, we won't make any progress on women's or men's issues.
Ideally both men and women would be supporting AND speaking up for each other. I feel if more men would speak up on women's issues instead of being silent, it could turn the tables a lot to women doing the same
@@williamcondon7729 if it actually worked that way we probably wouldn't have as many problems. It's been shown that men don't listen to women as much so men really need to start speaking up more.
@@williamcondon7729unfortunately, if more men had learnt the key message of feminism - which is that we do not need to be defined by gender prescriptions and that all human beings deserve to be safe and respected regardless of gender - they would be much safer themselves and much safer for women and other men to be around. The world does not have to be a violent zero-sum place.
The problem isn't that women aren't speaking up about men, it's when they are speaking down on men. I would rather women being silent than speaking about male issues.
I think women have been pretty cognizant of men's problems...at least online and in feminist spaces telling men it's okay to cry or be "girly" or not to worry about being the "big strong provider" type because they saw how that was mentally affecting men. They're usually the people who point out that a hot female teacher sleeping with a male student is abuse, but it is usually men who are high-fiving the kid. Women do speak up for men but it sometimes falls on deaf ears.
Most public educators and mental health professionals are not fairly compensated and require expensive formal degrees which deters a lot of men. Yes, we need more federal initiatives to get more men in education and mental health professions. We ALSO need Red states in particular to STOP DEFUNDING public education and advocating for terrible policies like school “choice” aka privatization and resource reallocation and concentration to wealthy families. And as we have learned Red states and poor states will not do anything unless they are incentivized and mandated to do so.
Why does it deter men and not women? Why don’t men care enough about their own mental health to want to step up and help,other men? Why does the responsibility for everyone only fall on women?
But the reason teachers and caregivers are not respected is because it is seen as a profession for women. When men were the only ones allowed to be teachers and doctors they were considered extremely prestigious. Again, it's a sexism issue. People need to value the work women do in order to value those professions, in order for men to consider them respectable jobs they want to do.
The fact that this conversation is so hard to have shows that feminism has gone from rightly trying to raise the rights of women in the 60s-80s to a political power movement that has become anti-men.
As a man, I never gave a single thought in my life about "masculinity," and I've done just fine. I am masculine, I don't have to think about it. My mother gave me feminine qualities, too. I live my energy. I don't think about what I do or don't have. I am alive. I don't think I am alive!
Totally agree, and I support your liberated view of yourself. I'm a woman and I clearly have both masculine and feminine qualities. I don't have to think about it either... I seamlessly apply whichever is most effective in any given situation. Its not like life only throws us one kind of experience 😂. We get all kinds of opportunities and experiences, and some are better dealt with through our feminine energy, others through our masculine energy. How is this still such a taboo and edgy subject. Grow up, people! We are both.
This was really interesting. I'm glad that they got into some specifics about the problem(s) toward the end. They kind of danced around how to deal with the gendered timeline for brain development. We've seen it in our younger son, who dropped out of high school his senior year, only to return, some six years later, to university where he is absolutely killing it, and where he wants to go into teaching at the college level. I'm glad to have gender equality that can find solutions for all.
I wish they had talked about that more. We now understand a lot of the root causes of the difference in performance in schools/education, but nobody ever puts forward any solutions.
@@romabqui Where is this?! As someone who had been teaching for years, I can't imagine that being a public school job anywhere in the US. The median pay across the country is significantly less than half that. Even in the highest paying States, teacher salaries will barely push median for all jobs across the country
This is hands down my favorite part of rotating hosts. Desi always brings great conversations around gender, and we're actually getting such a cool variety of perspectives with the guests.
The cool new perspective of yt men who demand to be centered is a perspective America needs to hear more about
Desi and Kosta are the best!
@@LovelyIslandVacation-ch6woYou mean Clay Higgins?
A woman’s approach! lol. Inclusive , whole, nurturing!
She allows the guests to communicate complete thoughts and doesn’t interrupt to force a joke.
Scott Galloway makes similar arguments, but Reeves does it in a less abrasive manner and provides some hope for change. His ability to use humor to explain the problem makes the message more receptive to others IMO.
His more serious framing is just as effective as his humor in disinfecting the taboo that has grown over this issue, and giving others a better way to discuss it as well. I applaud him as well!
Contrast it with how Jordan Peterson talks about the same stuff. Totally different vibe. I suppose some of that is contingent on the interviewer.
Different audiences. Reeves will move TDS listeners/educated but won’t appeal to the podcast crowd and doesn’t have a whole lot of blue collar appeal. It’s educated and you can see him doing a bunch of positioning before delivering perhaps critical statements. Right now men are reacting against this type of speaking. That’s Galloway’s utility and there’s a danger in criticizing the messengers too much that we miss the point.
@@azzers214 This is a message directed as much to women as to men, to the blue collar as much as to the white collar. There is a need for different messengers to get the message across.
galloway is trash. not an ally.
A really important point that he made that needs repeating is the if we don't address young men's issues in a responsible way, then irresponsible people will address them. People like Andrew Tate. And we don't want that.
It's not only that they don't get addressed. That would be bad enough. Reeves is right when he says that it's a prevalent belief that "men don't have problems." And it's nice to hear him speak up about "toxic masculinity". It's a made up thing meant to denigrate men and boys, the same way"hysterical" used to be applied to women.
just feels like we are asking women and all the ptsd from all the assualt to be stepped aside and turn the other cheek and understand. he wants us to care about men but without accountability for the harm caused that part i don't know how to square. I have been assualted so many times... its exhausting. only ONE of those times was it a guy i actually was dating. Every other time was a colleague in a work place ... sigh
@@LafemmebearMusic That's not what he's saying at all. People are capable of addressing two different issues at the same time. We can care about men's issues while at the same time caring about women's issues. He never said that men who assault women shouldn't be held accountable.
@@LafemmebearMusicyou’re the one saying those words. The first part of his mansplaining was about the fact that taking on this issue is not diminishing the other issues. It’s almost as if you didn’t watch or listen to the part that 2 things can be true at the same time.
The problem has been identity politics. We can't lump all men together, or all women - or all black men, asian women, etc. In every group, there are those that are doing just fine, those that need help, and those that are causing the problems.
This is such a brilliant conversation. What a brave, powerful and productive posture to take on this issue. Our society would benefit from a willingness to have more important hard conversations like this with openness and levity.
This was a pathetic conversation - a man looking weak and scared of being called out by a feminist, while saying not to blame feminists, while also blaming feminists. Seriously now? What's happened to men that the only ones I see in media are rage-fulled idiots, creepy weirdos, or those scared of shadows? hbomberguy, folding ideas, and shaun are all more impressive men and trying to provide a positive way forwards for men in the 21st century.
Yes, and this is only the surface, he doesn't really get into the ways the struggles of men and woman are different. For example, men are taught to be guarded with their emotions their whole lives, making therapy a much more difficult road. Women are making economic strides today nurtured with mass support, over decades of fighting for their rights, and that's great. Traditionally a man's role is to carry a heavy burden by standing strong without support. As the barriers between genders soften, men need more support to equalize that balance.
You are unemployed, it's obvious 🎉
You're welcome.
So great.
There was a time not too long ago where this conversation would have been literally impossible to have. Bravo
Yeah, like just a short while ago before the election. You would be attacked and called all kinds of names for supporting men. Wonder why the blue team lost?
@@EmrysMerlin8807 I mean, “not long ago” was about two months back on Jon Stewart’s TWS.
Yes! I was floored to hear the exposition.... Richard does a very very cautious tightrope walk. I've read about the crazy rate of suicide among men, it's horrible.... and calling men (derogatory term) for seeking mental health counseling.... this needs to be talked about, and you're 100% right that not too long ago this would have been impossible... but isn't it still??? "Men don't have problems, men are the problem." I'm curious if there's any fallout from this book and interview.... we shall see.
When?
To the person who just asked if I was reporting their comments, no. I'm getting the notificating that you're leaving the comment, but by the time I get to RUclips to respond, it's already gone.
This guy is is an incredible scholar and doing such important work, thanks for having him on
Why would they if they didn't lose an election. don't assume this station actually cares about anything but the next election.
I couldn`t agree more! 💪
He is a male feminist
He's a hack that plagiarized the two original scholars of Men and Masculinity and never talks about endemic violence.
He is not, he's a grifter selling red pill ideas to gullible leftists.
I am surprised to see this conversation occurring like this. Respect.
Finally, right?
It's only happening because Trump had several young men vote for him. Now people want to throw an olive branch to men.
Nice to see, but I don't think anybody in that audience actually listened
@@edilee5909 I did.
It only took Jordan Peterson, Andrew Tate & Trump getting reelected to see liberals talking about this. That's 10yrs worth of right-wing influences capturing male minds bc they recognized an easy opening.
Sincerely though I find this conversation incredibly frustrating because it's so, so long overdue. I've watched political narratives for 10yrs on these issues like they were a time bomb and they were. If liberal politics embraced masculinity and could talk about these issues perhaps there would be stronger liberal or moderate male voices to counteract Trumpism. But no.., it's all toxic until democrats got stomped in the last election and here we are.
Too little too late. This situation of genders at odds with each other is going to take generations to unwind and will have serious economic, political & social repercussions affecting EVERYONE.
Such an important conversation. As a mom of a boy and a girl, I’ve seen how boys have odds stacked against them in school early on - like in kindergarten. That does not diminish the challenges I know my daughter faces. The struggles of boys (and men) deserve to be heard and seen. Leave it to the Daily Show to bring important convos to the forefront. Bravo.
So stacked against them 🙄 not catered to, how will they survive?!
I'm genuinely glad you appreciate the importance of the convo, but this conversation has been happening for a while now. The Daily Show is a bit behind the curve overall, but perhaps a bit early for left leaning sources? In fact the topic has generally been met with hostility and scorn from the left. A lot of that comes from the vibe flawed messengers from the men's movement give off and its taken a Richard Reeves with his very diplomatic and agreeable presentation to speak the things that others have been saying for a while.
Can you give examples? _"I’ve seen how boys have odds stacked against them in school early on - like in kindergarten. "_
Can you elaborate on how the odds are stacked against boys?
@@missinterpretation4984 they are too immature to start school at age 5. should wait another year.
Daily Show continuing the strong tradition of being a better source of information as a satirical comedy show than corporate media. Desi you rock!
Really glad Richard Reeves was asked to come onto the show, this is the conversation I wish was actually had when he was invited to the weekly show.
Great conversation. I will definitely read this book. One big thing not addressed regarding the lack of men entering teaching: the paltry salary and lack of respect too many Americans have for the dedicated people doing this crucially important work.
That's in large part due to teaching and most things related to caring being deemed "women's work" aka not work, not valuable, and not deserving of high renumeration.
... Had lots of male teachers growing up in 60s-70s
We men are told our value is based upon our income and social status. There is a reason the girls chase after the Rockstar and not the guy working in the concession stand.
I wanted to raise the same issue- we have devalued careers that have become more seen as “women’s work”, ie care fields- teaching, social work as two obvious examples- and the salaries have fallen relative to male-dominated fields. If we want more men teaching, we have to value education more and fund it a heck of a lot more so we can pay teachers more attractive salaries!
I feel like he is the best or at least the most diplomatic at talking about this stuff - which is important because if you don't have basically a perfectly fair frame around anything gender related many people will rush to stop listening and retreat to their own flawed and biased perspectives about us versus them, etc.
Honesrly, kinda disagree.
The man has to bend over backwards to be the most diplomatic and inclusive of women's issues at all times.
This IS a comedy interview, obviously, so the comedic exaggeration and silliness from Desi is on brand... but can you REALLY imagine women's issues needing so much extra context?
I've been discussing gender politics and men's rights online for around a decade.
Things are WAY better now than they used to be... but some accountability should really be taken by feminists. THe man here very diplomatically suggestred that the refusal to talk about these issues left a vacuum. There was no "refusal" there was outright hostility. I watched as men's issues were VERY successfully taken over by the right wing, who offer no solutions and are objectively worse in every metric for men, while the left cheered it on.
Last election was (hopefully) a wakeup call. But some of us have been sounding the alarm for YEARS. And being called every name you can imagine for it.
Just remember the rhetoric about "Bernie bros"
Look up "self made man" by Norah Vincent (and how little traction it got)
Look up Cassie Jaye's "the red pill"
Folks have been trying for a long time to point out the flaws in gender politics discussions.
It really hasn't been men who are unwilling to listen or compromise.
@@DmGray I here you completely. I am a woman and I wouldn't call myself a feminist but I obviously have a stronger lean towards women's issues. However, what i've recognised is that academic conversations are great and very necessary, but in the real lives of women many things haven't changed for the better. Some of those women are then chronicaly online discussing their personal issues and seeing EVERYTHING through the lens of their personal trauma and woe betide you if you fail to disagree with that narrative. Women's issues become popular and lucrative both financially and socially and generate a type of cultural capital that become addictive because it feeds the vindication of the aforementioned personal traumas. It's actually a hot mess!
This then does leave a massive void for those with nefarious purposes to swoop in and pick up the boys and men who feel left behind and have no other framework other than the Andrew Tates of teh world to figure out how to be. We NEED to have these converstaions, all of us, but we need to have them from a place of understanding that sits outside of our persoanl traumatic experiences otherwise the listening will never take place and nothing will ever get better.
BUT, it's because of all of that framing and the long history of female subjugation why I totally understand the necessity for Reeves to be so diplomatic. He won't be heard if he isn't.
@@DmGray You disagreed... but then made the same point the original poster made. See allies where they are.
@@DmGray I couldn't really follow your position, like the other poster said I'm not sure where you were disagreeing. But on the point of the politicization of these issues I'm not a fan of the deafening rage around gender politics. It's impossible to not get offended no matter where you land in the quagmire of online hot takes. Republicans and corporations take advantage them as talking points and distract from earth shifting issues like the environment and the ultra wealthy.
@@DmGray even through a comedic lens, it seemed to me as if Desi Lydic was pushing back a little much, which, ya know, in hindsight is fine (I think there was some actual tension when Reeves called her out on womansplaining his own book to him lol)
Given the choice I’d always prefer an interviewer to be critical regardless of the topic rather than swallow, smile, nod, applaud.
We have to rise together! Or we don't rise at all! Yes!
Yeah, if I remember HIStory correctly, there are a lot of cultures that did really well even when woman were bound to the house, like in the birthplace of democracy: Athens. So, no don't like the argument. But do wholeheartedly believe in a world of freedom, peace and prosperity for all.
What? Women have only had the vote for 100 years, women just lost the right to control their own bodies but sure, we all rise together. SMH that this whining is topical.
If we rise together then men stay on top
@@emilyoud5190western culture was built on it
@@emilyoud5190 Right, but there are also a lot of cultures "that did really well" with a fascist rule/dictatorship. But that is because no democracy existed. I wrote a way to big text...But basically:
There in history has been women in incredible position of power, truthfully deciding everything from their own economy, to living alone in entire sections of society (not only rich or family connections, or whatever else technicality, but truthfully deciding their own lives). The past 100 years or so, is not the first time women were able to decide what happens to society (should be rather obvious, women are not sheep or toys that suddenly woke up 100 years ago). The only place that still practice that is Indonesia, because the laws and society reflected to equally improve society for men and women. When men and women are not happy together, there is no future for either party, which is mostly dangerous for women.
-Even if you have a certain hate for men, or expecting men to be on top at all times, it would be the best play, to care for men, like men cares for women.- (And by men caring for women, I obviously mean that most red pilled guys, used to be feminist in some capacity, and the men that are pointing out women difficulties. Even at the start of this story (America) men where the ones who went out there, to promote women to vote and work/become independent.
Grew up in the 50's. Teacher was one profession women COULD be without a lot of hassle. I had mostly female teachers for 12 years--two male teachers. This conversation was eye opening to me. Think I need to learn more about this issue. Thank you
Well Said Richard!
Richard Reeves saved my life
How are you holding up these days, my man?
whoa. Say more?
This is a conversation that fathers and mothers, needed to have with thier sons, about 45 years ago. Societal change starts from within the home, always. Ideals are passed generationally.
Learn this one particular trait from your grandfather (because he does --- well) but also this other trait from your sister (because she does --- better than others) ...as a child and teen you need multiple examples to learn from in order to find the balance later on in life, of a semi-well adjusted person.
Lol most kids grow up barley interacting with their parents they are to busy working pay check to pay check
@TheEvolver311 You're absolutely right, I won't try to argue against that. But I did say 45 years ago and that would've been when one earner households were still quite common. Never the less, this is one big reason in how we got here. As distracted, tired, unwilling parents unengaged with their children and teaching the nuanced things about themselves that nor school or friendships couldn't.
Working tirelessly paycheck to paycheck is super rough, been there...but as a parent, you don't (or *shouldn't) have a choice but to also put energy into your children.
A lot of people used that as an excuse and now we have a generation of men that have no awareness of what it means to be positive influence in masculinity....and so they looked elsewhere; and found a false representation of manhood in a spray tan diety.
It's also a conversation we have to have with our wives and daughters about no longer ignoring the inequalities faced by men.
Hard to take lessons from your male role models when they don't exist. Too many kids in single mother households. Zero decent male role models in the entertainment media that kids are watching these days. There's no more Mr. Rogers. Now it's Mr. Beast. And dad can't make up for it because mom wasn't even married, or got a divorce because the marriage was "boring".
I was lucky my parents raised my brother and I as equals, but as typical girl and boy of the late 1970's, never thought of his problems as any less important as mine. didn't grow up in USA either, seemed weird to me that some brothers didn't see their sisters as equals, some even saw each other as some do today as an enemy to be tricked.
Great book! Really changed my view of the gender debate and made me approach the issue in a whole new way.
I don’t know if I’ve ever been more impressed with how someone conducted an interview.
Watch Trevor Noah’s interview with Jennette McCurdy! Whether serious or satire, The Daily Show is just always top-tier when it comes to their interviews
Yes! We need more men in education, but one reason men don’t go into education is because they are taught that they are supposed to be the main bread winner while the woman stays home and takes care of the family, but a teacher is not paid enough to support a single income family, so teachers are there to supplement their husband’s income. I am a teacher and the majority of male teachers are those who have a wife who makes more money. Also, teaching is not a respected profession in America-it’s considered baby sitting and the Right has been attacking teachers for years, so because of sexism, pink professions are low paid and not respected, and that is not a draw for men. I am a teacher so I can be a mom and have to same schedule as my children. But, yes, I love having male teachers at my school and I wish there were more and I wish that people respected teachers.
I’ve been waiting for this book to get off of hold at the library since November 2024. Glad Reeves and others are having this conversation!
This is one of the best interviews I've ever heard. A most important conversation that I enjoyed and learned from start to finish.
Excellent conversation. Really important stuff.
I was startled when he mentioned wages falling for men. I had to stop the video and look up declining wages for males, what I found was yes, the male wage rates declining the following text in the quotation marks is from Brooking Institute 3-4-2011 "Have Earnings Actually Declined?" "The median wage of the American male has declined by almost $13,000 after accounting for inflation in the four decades since 1969. This is a reduction of 28 percent!" Remember this statement is from 2011, so this 2011 money.
That's a general statement for the US.
The average American has become far poorer if you look at purchase power.
at least the rich got richer ;D
The rich men beating down other men
@@Emanon... might call it the median American if you will
@@frydac 😭
Love Desi on the daily show!!! Amazing interviewer and comedian. And generally insightful and empathetic person. Thank you for being on the daily show ❤
I'm currently studying to get my Doctorate Nurse Practitioner license in Psychiatry. That will be one more.
That is some decent work. Thank you for advancing humanity.
One thing that would help is to bring back unstructured play in kindergarten. When I was in a child in the 60s-70s, there was no homework in kindergarten. We played, we learned stuff, but mostly we experimented with toys and crafts and had to negotiate our social relationships with each other-boys and girls alike. We still learned our ABCs and the beginnings of how to read and numerate, no problem. I can't believe what I hear from parents today about their 5-year-olds having homework. Play builds social skills and a sense of confidence around self-efficacy (how you can affect external conditions and create change in what surrounds you successfully).
The bigger issue is that kids never play without adult supervision anymore. That's abusive to our children's development. The biggest part of early socializing if learning how to cooperate and work out your disagreements with each other, not with parents refereeing at all times. Parenting has gone off the rails in this country.
@@jcharles8801 well I mean no one wants their kid's head to get hurt
Great to see Richard on the show proper after the podcast
Worked with men for 20 years and have been saying this for years. Men need help to see their role as men since it has been changing since the end of WWII. Yes, we need men teachers, need incentives!
Desi is a marvelous interviewer and has high quality guests. Brava, Desi!
Too bad she spends 90% of her time saying "Men are the problem".
She’s all over him ❤😂
She is a misandrist
Loved the bit about men in education. I may not be a classroom teacher but I do teach after school and it can be just as important. My job is more than just hanging out with kids. It's leaading club and activities and teaching those activities. Very intresting segment.
America’s adversaries love it when we are divided against our neighbors and families. We need to love each other as Human beings.
Your allies don't though.
Yes, but we have issues around gender that this conversation addresses. There’s nothing about divisiveness in this conversation.
Women would like to be left in peace, thank you.
Regarding education and male teachers - I agree that we need more. And I also feel this shift was also due to men leaving fields that were not as prestigious. The teacher of the "old days" is often represented as a drill sergeant figure. Strict and authoritative. Now that teaching is more creative, caring and psychology based - these qualities are associated with women, and some men do not chose to pursue this career. Also i think salaries are a big issue. No one wants to take a stressful and poorly compensated job, but women have a bit higher tolerance to these factors, I think.
So my (not very scientific) conclusion is that teaching needs to be a prestigious and an economically sound career option for more men to return.
It's not the salaries (though poor salaries don't help), in other countries that pay teachers very well (e.g. Canada & nordic countries) the gender gap among teachers is the same.
This was great. I understand the criticism in comments, but to get this sort of conversation at this level is fantastic.
Its sad that this is somehow a win. People are killing themselves, but we have to first talk about how we respect women, before we can talk about the problem.... its sad really. And the jokes are completely inappropriate
@p382742937423y4 lol cmon man you sound so soft
@@timblank4432 I wish I understood some of that criticism you mention. It makes zero sense to me, unless it’s folks trolling (which I doubt, but would actually prefer, in this case).
@methodsocratic There was some trolling, then some people missing that the jokes are the MO of the show, Desi trolls the author and the author is rational. Then some doubting the author’s accuracies and arguments, and that it took too long to talk about this, which is just part of the conversation. Then the usual comments that missed the point or weren’t listening.
@p382742937423y4 The jokes is just how the show works, the host trolls and the author makes sense. Again back to the point of the author’s, we can care about both the suicide / mortality rate of men and men’s issues and respect women at the same time. It’s not zero sum, even though some may want to frame it as that.
Part of the problem is that most people are NOT capable of more than one thought at a time.
I disagree, most can and do. They’re just to afraid to say it out loud. They addressed this in the interview, you weren’t allowed to talk about men’s issues because people would jump down your throat and call you sexist. Fear of social repercussions has halted many important conversations. Remember how shocked people were when Jon went on Colbert and basically said the lab leak theory was true? Nobody was allowed to say that at the time, RUclips channels being shut down, being banned from Twitter. Now it’s the leading theory and has basically been confirmed. We all knew deep down but we were all silenced by the freaks who somehow equated it with racism.
Nah, they are.
That’s what religion used to help us with.
well, *acktchually*, no one is, but that’s not what he meant
Most people would be capable of thinking, if they tried, but most people are not motivated to think. It's so easy in modern society to just reproduce and consume without thinking.
In this particular area, it's not a competition. It's an attempt for understanding.
If you think for ONE SECOND men don't believe it's a competition, you've been duped. You're falling for one of the oldest tricks in the book. Tell YOUR team they need to do anything to win, tell your competition that 'hey, this is not a competition, you really need to be more collaborative and empathetic' and then guilt them for trying to win.
@FishareFriendsNotFood972 Nice rant about team competition you have there.
Has nothing to do with a gender defending the other gender concerning inequality.
Maybe go start your own thread?
@@FishareFriendsNotFood972
It sounds like you're treating fish as food rather than friends here
@FishareFriendsNotFood972 Nice rant about team competition you have there. Has nothing to do with the male gender defending the female gender against inequality.
Have a nice day.
@@rankat1841 Huh? Since when did men defend women against inequality? LOL I think your grasp on English must not be the strongest
Love this guy!!
I tapped so fast! Used his long form article on the topic in my AP Lang classroom awhile back and think his work is so important. Thank you for this!
Hey, more men in teaching? up the pay scale for all teachers and stop disrespecting teachers by calling out parents who defend their kid’s bad behavior.
as a former male teacher, the idea that you need a "second income" to make it work is so pervasive. Even the men talk about their bread-winning wives a lot. Which is fine, but like, why does teaching have to be the secondary income job for a man or a woman?
Its parents fault sit the friend down
Yes, but also that's not how society works. Gender-biases are so entrenched in society that pay follows gender rather than the other way round. Teachers are poorly paid because it is a women-dominated career, IT jobs are well paid because it is a male-dominated career, when the gender-balance of these fields was reverse so was the pay.
We need to have the really hard conversation if we actually want to fix things rather than pointing fingers at each other. Just take a moment to think about why is nursing and teaching female-dominated while doctors and university professors are male-dominated? Because it is all about the societial perception of "caring", caring is associated with women and vehemently not men so careers involving caring for others are seen as women's work. The decline of men in teaching closely parallels the shift from teachers as disciplinarians to teachers as nurturers of student potential. So, if we want to reverse the trend, what do we do? Do we go back to allowing teachers to spank students? Or do we teach men that they can be nurturers too?
Teacher pay across the country depends on geographic location...is 125k poor pay...in the NYC area this is common with tenure
AI will take over education in USA - next
Great conversation. Let's not forget that kindergarten is now what first or even second grade used to be 30 years ago. There's no "learning through play" in public schools anymore thanks to endless testing. This hurts boys more than girls.
How does it hurt boys more than girls? Why does it hurt boys more than girls?
It's so funny to see people trying to take tests out of school and introduce more play time because testing "hurts boys".
@@bigdreams5554 how does it hurt boys more than girls? That makes no sense.
We want equal footing for men and women. That's what feminism is supposed to be about. Although he doesn't like the term "toxic masculinity", that's what causes men to not want to seek mental health care and to talk about their problems bc having emotions is seen as "weak". I hope more men will pursue careers in education and psychiatry and psychology so other men feel more comfortable going for help.
As a feminist woman raising 4 young men, I approve this message. It seems less and less a conversation about equality and more about superiority.
EWWWWW ahhhh ffs. Women still do not have anywhere near equal rights. Can ya please keep your eye on the ball for two seconds?
lol u gonna raise 4 beta simps
You get it. It caused a cognitive dissonance in me. I tried to support your movement until I felt it was out to turn the tables, not to level the playing field. Sneaky, sneaky...
@@FishareFriendsNotFood972 you the reaso nthe left will never wi nagain if they keep putting the women have it worst or blacks have it worst mentality the truth is YOU DONT YOU JUST HAVE DIFFERENT ISSUES.
@@mrnice1976I just want to be left alone and in peace.
This concept of addressing more than one problem at a time is something that comes up in so many things. "Care for vets before aid to Ukraine", "no more homelessness before student loan forgiveness." We have always been able to tackle multiple problems at the same time until some decided to take issues and vilify one side by deflecting to some other issue.
I'm curious if his book and/ or other works go more into plausible causes for the decline in ratio of men succeeding in upper secondary and tertiary schools and ratio of men working in primary and secondary education.
I wouldn't be surprised if they are highly tied to the declining working conditions for teachers and from there have become a vicious feedback loop. I, myself, was a teacher for years and got pushed out by the combination of non-living income and toxic work environments.
In Canada, we used equity hiring to promote male teachers in the younger grades in the 90s so male applicants are chosen over female applicants. Also, in Canada, teachers are well-paid. We improved the ratio somewhat but male teachers just aren't as interested in teaching younger students. And it didn't make a big difference in educational outcomes for young men.
@@prof.jezebel Yup, it's not just the practicalities, it is the culture and perception of the career. Teaching has been reframed in the cultural mindset into a "nurturing" job rather than a "disciplinarian" job which lines up with the gender expectations: women == nurturing, men == disciplinarian. Since society punishes men who do not adhere to masculine expectations, men choose to avoid nurturing-associated careers.
Feminists have been talking about these problems for years - it's where the whole toxic masculinity thing comes from. But men seem to just want to blame the feminists for the problem rather than, you know, actually try to fix it.
What an insightful and significant interview. And on a comedy show of all places!
I’m retired now but being a man in elementary education in a regular classroom is incredibly difficult. Being the first in my area I had to be better than everyone else. I had to be for the next guy to come in and get an opportunity. You can also add the facts that I wasn’t from the area or had the correct religious beliefs. I didn’t think those things would matter but I found out quickly they did. In all the years I taught there it didn’t change. In the last eight years it got worse. I must close by saying I would still do it again. It was worth it for me.
Women go through this all the time. We have to be better than our male coworkers.
He is correct, tribalism doesn't work. Time to stop the division and come together as fellow human beings 👍
He's contributing to tribalism - young men and women face the same job market - men are not bread winners anymore - both are both as it should be
feminism is tribalism
KNOW YOU SAY IT. You weren’t saying that back in 2020. #wokeisdead
@@Blackshadow164 Woke isn't dead - because there will always be educated people who know our history and how this country was built - the promise of America is for all Americans - not just you
@@Merriwether-w8k thanks for the excellent comment of truth.. I usually ignore or delete ignorance
I really appreciate this interview and am going to read this book. This topic is close to my heart because of a mental health related loss of someone close to me. Thank you for sharing.
Richard Reeves is spot on with the men feeling left out of the conversations of people who are struggling. Every single Democrat politician should watch this video.
I speak as a man who is on the left and I see how the right gets so many men to go to their side. The right acknowledges men and many of their struggles right now in the world, but then they place blame on the wrong people and the wrong things. The right is dominating the political podcast space, because of their outreach to young men.
The left has done very little outreach at all for young men. Unless your a man of color, or a woman, your problems don't matter. Its so FRUSTRATING that the idiots in charge of the Democrat party don't see what's happening. Its exactly what Reeves said. You can advocate for better policies for women AND AT THE SAME TIME acknowledge that men have been having a real hard time too. If the left continues to ignore the male loneliness epidemic they will continue to loose young men to the likes of Andrew Tate, and all the idiots at the Daily Wire.
And exactly what do you propose that politicians do about this loneliness epidemic? Acknowledge it? And then what? What solution do YOU think would work?
One of the most eye-opening episodes I've watched. My time not wasted today ❤
Unfortunately, Desi will immediately go back to bashing men on this show.
If teachers got a half decent pay in the US , more men would be interested in jointing the profession
A LOT of men, including me, are still teachers anyway! What a profoundly ignorant thing to say!
profoundly even, care to explain?
I would guess higher pay would just attract more ppl, including men. Maybe "on average", men prioritize higher pay more than women? I have no clue, I don't have actual stats, but if that is true, than it is not that profoundly ignorant I would think?
Let me get this, women should expect less pay and that is why they are willing to be teachers? Grossly entitled. And in many places teachers make will close to 100 K.
@@tallspicy Exactly! I HATE OP's argument. It's ignorant and sexist.
@@MatthewTheWanderer He didn't say there weren't a lot of men in education. There is a gender gap, and if we want to attract more men, then the reputation for low pay for hard work is not helping. There may be other reasons, but it's not the ignorant, sexist, worst comment of all time like you are making it out to be. Do you think increased teacher pay wouldn't bring male interest to the field?
Great message, Professor Galloway has a lot of similar videos on the subject, he is also visiting the sort of podcasts that need to hear this, so thanks for amplifying it.
24 y/o german male teacher here. I couldn't agree more. I am soo outnumbered in Uni 😂
This is the problem with EVERYTHING! No one wants to talk nuance, they just like using the word. But when we talk reality and solutions, everyone is like "Well, we can only try to eat this soup with a butter knife or a hamster, those are the only options" and not a single word of discussion can be had within a group as to why something about it is wrong. Its insane.
I am deeply saddened by seeing woman victimized. With that said, it was infuriating to be treated as someone less than human and not worthy of compassion. My paycheck was more important than anything else I had to offer my Family. Watching my Family disintegrate over the last 5 years has been heart breaking. I hope to have a relationship with my children as they grow into adulthood. Victimhood is no path I wish on anyone.
It is unfortunately the path being taught to youth. How many intersectionalities can you rack up to be ‘more oppressed’ and therefore get more privilege. If you haven’t seen it, there is a hilarious RUclips video mocking it called ‘modern education’ by Neil kahatar.
Wow. If *only* Jon had encouraged this frankness on TWS late last year.
Just watch the last several minutes of that episode: it’s a picture-perfect example of people treating this topic as a zero-sum competition between men & women, as if addressing either issue mutually excludes the other.
Sorry about my ignorance (I'm not american...) but what is TWS? Thanks
@@Xcalator35 The weekly show, Jon Stewart's weekly podcast
The episode was a bit lackluster, I agree. The stuff they ended up talking about was interesting as well, but it wasn't what they were supposed to talk about.
@@Altruistic-General Ah ok. Thanks!
My thoughts exactly, I was really hopeful when seeing the topic for that episode of the weekly show and came out of it incredibly disappointed, I am really glad that Richard Reeves was asked to come onto the daily show for this interview, it was exactly what I wish the podcast episode had actually touched on.
It’s an important discussion and I’ve read the book but I wish it was more solution-focused than recitation of statistics and the problem statement. If Biden promotes more women in STEM and women also have the natural tailwind of pursuit of/desiring education, there is synchronicity. If there was a push for more male teachers, but men have declining education outcomes, there is a headwind inherently in developing more male teachers. Where I live, there are more volunteers that sign up to become BigSisters than BigBrothers…how do you make men also care more about mentoring men?
That's a a great question, and the hardest part. First is identifying and talking about the issue. It's taken decades for women to get recognized over many fronts, over a century if you go back to woman's suffrage and the right to vote. I believe the younger generation growing up today have a new perspective on gender, but the current political turmoil complicates my hope for the future. I found an old video with Richard Reeves talking about his HEAL acronym, a male version of women in STEM: Health, Education, Administration and Literacy. That's really stuck with me, since I saw it two years ago. I didn't realize it was the same author on the same book until I found the video, but I'll link it anyway. ruclips.net/video/DBG1Wgg32Ok/видео.html
There is one fairly simple metric that I'd be interested in seeing someone research and attempt to measure: What happens when boys have access to more adult male role models through their life where these men are modeling *virtuous* aspects of masculinity? Where are there "cool" examples of this in media? For example, confidently fixing things or helping/rescuing/protecting others, or successfully providing mentoring, skills and physical/social resources (not just money) that enable others (including women). This is why male teachers are important, but also why boys (and all people!) need access to "third place" institutions like we used to have. Clubs, religious communities, civic organizations, recreational sports, volunteering etc. were places where boys could see various types of masculinity in action. You don't get this by watching superhero movies alone. Boys also need to see men contributing in loving, committed relationships, so they can see what the reward might be there. Most boys aren't exposed to men in their communities in this way anymore; they see men consuming, being entertained, possibly not working, or simply not around. We all need role models to see what's possible, what the choices are, and how these might play out.
Suspicion is routinely cast on men who work with children. This has been going on for decades and needs to stop. That's where the problem lies. It's the real reason there are so few men teaching young kids, even though it seems to be the women teachers who keep getting into trouble with their students.
Men who work with children have been put under suspicion. That has been going on since the 1980's, which was when the decline started happening. Nobody wants to talk about that, so they blame it on low pay.
Try to imagine addressing problems of racism with something like "How do you make Black people care about being successful and mentoring other Black people?"
Love your interviews Desi. This one is no exception. ❤
She does seem to do a little bit more listening. Why ask an expert to come on, if the host is going to interrupt with an extended exposition of Their Own position? A brief question could have been all that was necessary to address an objection to that the audience might have.
People can have two thoughts at once. I wish that were still true. It feels like most humans struggle to have one coherent thought nowadays.
Nice to see you bringing Reeves on again after the podcast episode to speak more about this!!
Lot to process here folks. Thanks Desi!
So refreshing to hear the voice of reason to bring us into a better future!
Possibly the best Daily Show interview of all time.😊❤❤❤
Thank you a reasonable logical man.
BRAVO SIR, BRAVO!
Awesome book. We need more conversation re mature masculinity.
Mature masculinity is a great term, same with mature femininity. Something to rise up and aspire to be!
as a guy who was lucky enough to learn about the concept of “toxic masculinity” in a way I could get behind it, Reeves makes a great argument against using the term, even if it does describe things that must be discussed.
Ditch the sociological term privilege while we're at it.
Freedom from discrimination and feeling othered isn't a privilege to be taken away from some but a right that should be accorded to everyone.
It’s so amazing to finally see people saying things I tried warning people about back in 2007
Cool, so you've been wrong for a very long time.
Excellent interview! I’ve seen lots of issues with myself and friends. A lot of people have gone to the dark side because they’re suffering.
An extremely important conversation. Very late to the table though (about 30 years at least imo). Lets hope main stream media continue to discuss this very real and serious crisis.
I read his book back in 2022, and I've been recommending it ever since. He is right: there are a lot people who aren't ready to have the conversations he talks about, but they are critical ones to have if we want our society to improve. Shoutout to bell hooks who wrote "The Will To Change" 20 years ago and spoke on having more empathy for male suffering as well!
Of boys and men is the best peice of media i have consumed on gender issues, ever. Could not recommend it enough if you have even a passing interest in the subject!
YES YES YES. IM SOOSOSOSOSOO HAPPY YOURE GIVING THIS MAN A PLATFORM.!,!! Of boys and men is such a great book! It really really needs to be taken seriously. Even if not all his solutions vibes with you, knowledge the problems he writes about NEED to be spread!!!
This is why young men are gravitating to the right wing. I am a male and a feminist, but I am also aware of toxic femininity. It works both ways. Gender is a spectrum and we treat it as it is a polar term.
No.. there male and female.
Gender
@@PassportAdam 🤣🤣🙄
Is jen der the same as sax?
Are you a feminist?
You should probably know toxic feminist, the type that actually hate men, are rare and actual feminists want nothing to do with them.
Ooof.... kudos to them both for tackling a very fraught topic. It's hard to talk about the needs and troubles of men in this time and age.... but I'd say that toxic masculinity impacts men in a lot of horrible ways. Thanks for stepping up and giving it a shot, Desi and Richard.
(You can argue against 'toxic masculinity' all you want, but I'm standing by my usage.)
misandrist
Toxic masculinity, privileges and white fragility are maybe useful in academic context, but used colloquially they become counterproductive.
Use [internalized] misandry instead of toxic masculinity. It's more useful and less stigmatizing.
Let's be honest: "toxic masculinity" is not used in its academic form, it's used as an insult. It's an insult based on the gender one was assigned at birth. Calling men "toxic" stops dialog. You can't have meaningful conversations after insults are thrown around.
Do not use the term toxic masculinity. Ever. If you want the academic equivalent talk about "internalized misandry" and the hatred of men who dare defy traditional gender roles.
Ask Black people if white superiority should only be relegated to academic study.
I very much agree. I’ve spent the last 20ish years in academia and have studied some of the thinkers and texts that influenced and inspired the modern radical left. More than anything else I’ve learned that they are *highly* specialised and cannot be understood without a comprehensive knowledge of philosophy, sociology and psychology (at the very least). When laypeople (for want of a better term) start throwing around terms like ‘structural prejudice’ or ‘internalised patriarchy’ (etc.) they rarely understand the history of these terms, their existence as responses to previous ideas, and most of all that they are ideas and not practical methodologies.
Women are gonna just step back and work on ourselves.
Lets fight for both men and women. Someone finally said it.
Men aren't fighting for women, though. They're not in it for us.
We need a new paradigm about teachers. The pay and benefits need to be better in order to attract the brightest applicants.
I love this conversation. Great job Desi & TDS
It's all and only the rich fault. Period... People from every race, creed, culture, gender are struggling 100% because of the RICH... Share their wealth, problem solved, it's not easy but it's that simple yes! 100%
Elon Musk did share his wealth with the hundreds of stockholders of twitter when he bought it.
@@AsifKhan-hf9zyhow? And if he shared any of his wealth, why did his net worth go up by so much?
Yet instead of blaming the men and women of the capitalist class, so many people pretend like it's men who are the oppressors. That's part of why young men shifted right: they see wealthy families exploit men for profit (especially with military drafts) and then hear insane theories about how it's men's fault.
Blame the rich not the men.
@@AsifKhan-hf9zyElon go home and stop commenting on stuff bud
@@AsifKhan-hf9zy
Totally worth it.
He helped save America.
What price can be put on freedom of speech?😃
I completed 2 Elementary teacher education programs. In my first cohort of 30 teachers in training there were 2 men. In my 2nd cohort of 50 there was only 2 men. Yes, recruiting young men to go into education, especially at the Elementary level should be a priority.
Wow he was great. The host looked uncomfortable but she was polite and understanding.
I just had the same reaction I had when I started reading White Fragility. Thank you for this very important point of view.
I normally like her, but the start of this conversation was extremely annoying. To minimize real issues with the tiny violin conversation was unbelievable. Let men minimize women problems and they would be out of a job. There are very real issues that men are facing in today’s culture.
As a teacher, I find the last bit interesting. There is an argument that teaching has become less prestigious as it has become less male. This isn’t a men vs. women issue. This is a patriarchy issue. Perhaps if teaching became respected, manageable, and well-paid, more men would join the profession. In the meantime, the many women who are already teachers would benefit.
You're not a teacher. You're a DEI hire.
Men opt out of professions once a certain percentage of women are in them. (I think it's 40%) This ALL entirely stems from a culture that teaches boys the WORST thing they could do is act like a girl. Unless we stop villainizing women and start seeing all humans as full-spectrum people, we won't make any progress on women's or men's issues.
I enjoyed watching this at 80% speed. ❤
Ideally both men and women would be supporting AND speaking up for each other. I feel if more men would speak up on women's issues instead of being silent, it could turn the tables a lot to women doing the same
It’s not one before the other. It’s both at the same time.
@@williamcondon7729 if it actually worked that way we probably wouldn't have as many problems. It's been shown that men don't listen to women as much so men really need to start speaking up more.
@@williamcondon7729unfortunately, if more men had learnt the key message of feminism - which is that we do not need to be defined by gender prescriptions and that all human beings deserve to be safe and respected regardless of gender - they would be much safer themselves and much safer for women and other men to be around. The world does not have to be a violent zero-sum place.
The problem isn't that women aren't speaking up about men, it's when they are speaking down on men. I would rather women being silent than speaking about male issues.
I think women have been pretty cognizant of men's problems...at least online and in feminist spaces telling men it's okay to cry or be "girly" or not to worry about being the "big strong provider" type because they saw how that was mentally affecting men. They're usually the people who point out that a hot female teacher sleeping with a male student is abuse, but it is usually men who are high-fiving the kid. Women do speak up for men but it sometimes falls on deaf ears.
If they ever decide on a permanent host (that’s not Jon), it needs to be Desi
Most public educators and mental health professionals are not fairly compensated and require expensive formal degrees which deters a lot of men. Yes, we need more federal initiatives to get more men in education and mental health professions. We ALSO need Red states in particular to STOP DEFUNDING public education and advocating for terrible policies like school “choice” aka privatization and resource reallocation and concentration to wealthy families. And as we have learned Red states and poor states will not do anything unless they are incentivized and mandated to do so.
Why does it deter men and not women? Why don’t men care enough about their own mental health to want to step up and help,other men? Why does the responsibility for everyone only fall on women?
The teachers in America have to be better respected in order for more men to stay in the profession. They need better pay and more respect!
But the reason teachers and caregivers are not respected is because it is seen as a profession for women. When men were the only ones allowed to be teachers and doctors they were considered extremely prestigious. Again, it's a sexism issue. People need to value the work women do in order to value those professions, in order for men to consider them respectable jobs they want to do.
The fact that this conversation is so hard to have shows that feminism has gone from rightly trying to raise the rights of women in the 60s-80s to a political power movement that has become anti-men.
The Will To Change is also another book I’d recommend next to this one.
As a man, I never gave a single thought in my life about "masculinity," and I've done just fine. I am masculine, I don't have to think about it. My mother gave me feminine qualities, too.
I live my energy. I don't think about what I do or don't have.
I am alive. I don't think I am alive!
Totally agree, and I support your liberated view of yourself. I'm a woman and I clearly have both masculine and feminine qualities. I don't have to think about it either... I seamlessly apply whichever is most effective in any given situation. Its not like life only throws us one kind of experience 😂. We get all kinds of opportunities and experiences, and some are better dealt with through our feminine energy, others through our masculine energy. How is this still such a taboo and edgy subject. Grow up, people! We are both.
Well if it works for you
As I put it, "I'm just me".
99% of men didn't give a single thought about masculinity until masculinity became heavily politicized.
You're a man, not a boy. The messages boys receive about themselves today are doing them harm.
Outstanding conversation.
Well this conversation is 10 years too late.
It's never too late, and this conversation was happening 10 years ago... it only just reached a platform where you saw it.
so, maybe just forget about it? or better late then never?
@@frydac whether I think about it or forget it makes no difference
@@TomBeardshaw oh, no harm no foul then, those college admission rates will just self correct before the women become infertile
This was really interesting. I'm glad that they got into some specifics about the problem(s) toward the end. They kind of danced around how to deal with the gendered timeline for brain development. We've seen it in our younger son, who dropped out of high school his senior year, only to return, some six years later, to university where he is absolutely killing it, and where he wants to go into teaching at the college level. I'm glad to have gender equality that can find solutions for all.
I wish they had talked about that more. We now understand a lot of the root causes of the difference in performance in schools/education, but nobody ever puts forward any solutions.
I had no idea what this interview was about till almost 3 minutes in.
Really important interview!!
American men are getting passports and going overseas to deal with this ..
Yep it's amazing PPB. way better life and peaceful life.
And exploiting vulnerable women in other countries, because they want a submissive woman, not equality.
Buh bye.
@@christinacontinelli4220 enjoy your cat's 😾.
@@christinacontinelli4220 American women are the twelfth most overweight women in the world...
This is an amazing conversation!
Teachers are not paid enough, which could be why fewer men teach.
Precisely. You want to encourage men in a field? Raise salaries. And everyone wins.
My kid's first grade teacher makes $115K, more than her dad.
@@romabqui Where is this?! As someone who had been teaching for years, I can't imagine that being a public school job anywhere in the US. The median pay across the country is significantly less than half that.
Even in the highest paying States, teacher salaries will barely push median for all jobs across the country
Men are assumed to be SA-ers/p3dos, that's probably more the issue.
@romabqui so your kid goes to one of the most exclusive private schools in the country because no public school teacher is making that