Dumb Lawyer Quotes IRL but in Ace Attorney
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- These are things said by real people. Think before you object.
For people asking about sources, please check out my pinned comment in "Dumb Lawyer Quotes IRL but in Ace Attorney 2"
Part 2: • Dumb Lawyer Quotes IRL...
Forum Argument in Ace Attorney: • Phoenix Wright: The du...
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I made another one which I honestly feel like its better cause the conversation is twice as stupid so check it out: ruclips.net/video/JnUVGBLmg5I/видео.html
For people asking about sources, please check out my pinned comment in "Dumb Lawyer Quotes IRL but in Ace Attorney 2"
(Also check out the rest of the series on my channel, they are a lot better than this one)
Pardon me, but you happen to have any links to these court cases? I want to know what was going on behind them that made these so ridiculous.
@@Akira-ss6cm Not links to the court cases but these quotes were all snippets from different court recordings put on multiple sites, you can find a collection of them online
The new one was so good! You are great for making this type of entertaining content.
isn't that the wrong link?
The joke about studying law was absolutely halsrious
“ace attorney is not accurate court” bro not even real court is accurate court
A
not sure what is "accurate" anymore
@@ATERAH it is just an illusion
@@mazadancoseben4818 just like pants and death.
@@JadeJuno YES
“The victim survived”
“Oh”
This one got me the most. The sheer acceptance.
Why do I imagine him sounding so disappointed
"Tsk... what a shame..."
"plip"
Let's fix that
"Yes, it is possible he could be alive, and is practicing law."
GOD DAMN
You cannot come back from that burn.
ROOASTEEDD
That one's probably fake sadly. There's no reason a brain would be removed before an autopsy was performed
@@smrtfasizmu7242 maybe it was removed after the autopsy.
@@jennibeanthesweetsqueen5245 then it couldn't have been in a jar on his desk when he was prepping to begin the autopsy as he stated
A couple of these sound like the joke answers in actual Ace Attorney games. That does not bode well for these lawyers.
Puhlease that makes them geniuses!!
@@danielhernandez2575 I love your pfp
it just goes to show how much care and effort when into the development of ace attorney
I’ve read the exact brain in a jar one years ago in a medicine themed joke book my dad had so I’m pretty skeptical that these are real quotes.
@@danielhernandez2575 no it doesn't it actually doesn't say much for their iq
Apollo is the kind of stupid that drags you down the his level and insists you fight him there.
He beats you with experience
dont you fucking call me out
Irrational people don’t respond well to rationality, they respond to fear. Not that I could ever scare someone, I’m an idiot.
Cash McCloud But idiocy is one of the things people fear most.
Apollo is my favorite character by far, I don't understand the hate people have for him 😂😭
“And your son, the 20 year old... how old is he?”
“He’s 20, much like your IQ.”
Haha
nice pfp
memento mori my friends
Memento Mori.
It's like you guys are part of a fucking cult
@@av3ngers17 maybe we are
I guess these lawyers weren’t blessed with the magical lawyer super power of Basic Logic.
Edgeworth will be very disappointed to see that
All bluff and no logic makes Lawyer man big dumb
@@ThumberBulls6 isn't that what Phoenix does all the time though?
In that sense he's a pretty typical and realistic portrayal of a lawyer then...
Lawyers are put under pressure but nevertheless they have had much experience and do their job professionally.
@@remixtheidiot5771 Yeah but Nick has help from a magic magatama and literal spirit channeling girl as assistant.
*These have become ten times funnier now that they're in AA style*
Your pfp and banner hurts
×Looks at PFP×
Call the icebergs
We got a ship to sink
@@SniperOnSunday huh
@@SniperOnSunday bruh
@Some characters aren't allowed **i criticize the original comment for attention**
I thought AA was exaggerated but turns out it is completely accurate
@Strong Watcher So you are suggesting spirit mediums are real?
@@AliKandirr well people that call themselves spirit mediums do exist so... yes?
@@AliKandirr
They are
They're just hack frauds irl
@@AliKandirr You should be in this video lmao
I mean, Ace Attorney is a satrie, meaning it's a mockery of reality.
Alone or by yourself
Both QwQ
that may have been worded to make the witness confess they were alone. but it was still stupid
I figure maybe it was like
"By yourself" means you are somewhere that might have people, but you have nobody you are there with
"Alone" probably means that nobody is with you period
Being by yourself at a restaurant is different than being alone in a restaurant
@@sionnachtine3659 the other lawyer(the one who probably brought the witness) could've objected that question, btw, if they where paying attention. That is inducing the witness, and is a big no no. So both sides where stupid.
@@100Darkspine wOaH so smart
"Did he kill you?"
"Yes."
*acends to heaven*
Yes but I got better.
I can't help but feel the addition of music would make this a lot funnier. Like putting the cornered theme whenever they ask their ridiculous questions as if they've solved the whole case.
You are right I was under the weather when I made this and too lazy to do the simple task of editing in the soundtrack ;(
(Def regret it now but I'll add it when I make another one)
@@Chessete No worries. It's still quite funny. Sorry that you were sick, glad you're not so anymore. I look forward to the next one as you mentioned.
@@skyjackal3127 and it’s out now!
Nah, I feel it like they just did a correct objection and that's why the music stoped
Oh, so THAT'S what was missing! I thought something was off
Layton's little 'oh' after hearing the victim survived the murder.....it's like he just walked into the trial with no clue it was a trial.
He's actually a pigeon in a human costume, Layton died in 1975
@@arizonagreenbee You shouldn't have said that. Now the pigeon's coming for you.
Why is Layton doing here? We are not in the AA vs Prof. Layton game are we?
666 likes
When you know most lawyers pull all-nighters arranging information it all starts making sense.
Honestly I've done the equivalent of some of these on less than 6 hours
@@pqbdwmnu whoa are you a lawyer?!
Yeah, can confirm, my mom is a lawyer.
The first one just had "But did you die tho?" vibes
@Wilson Nascimento I feel like this is a Vsauce quote, ngl.
Lawyers engage in plenty of logical fallacies and mind games in order to get a reduced sentence for their clients, he was definitely going for a "see? you're alive so it wasn't that bad" defense. If the lawyer gets the victim to admit on record that they're not mentally scarred then that will obviously result in a reduced sentence for their client.
Proving that someone from an autopsy is actually alive sounds like something that would actually happen in and Ace Attourney game lmao
Knowing how the game is it would turn out that the person WAS alive.
Hmm, you don't say...*inserts a plug for Random Encounters AA musical.*
There have been a couple cases where that happened such as when the one who died was actually the other twin
*Apollo:* "But how many were actually dead?"
*The Doctor:* "They were all dead..."
*Edgeworth:* _tut tuts in updated autopsy report_
What you don’t know is that some of these questions, while dumb on the surface, can be psychological
how so?
@@notpukicho2950 it’s hard to explain unless you’ve been to law school or been a paralegal. Stupid questions may not make sense at first but you start to realize later that they were preparing the witness or examinee to think a certain way so as to lead them down a path of questioning and thus paint a narrative. Everything can have a reason.
@@warthogvanguard7292 “We’re you present when your picture was taken?”
@@EtamirTheDemiDeer believe what you want bro
Some of these that makes sense, but some of these I just can't figure out why. Some seem silly but could just be making certain of facts.
I need ProZD to voice these.
YES PLEASE
Gumshoe would fit archibalf's voice
He did a playthrough and did voices and it’s so good
oh, Hey Dox!
Big yes
*_"Yes, it is possible that be could have been alive and practicing law"_*
_OOF_
I think that lawyer need to apply cold water to the burned area xD
Chief he needs a whole ass shower for that burn
The doctor is the prime suspect he just murdered that lawyer
"how can you be so sure, Doctor?"
"because his Brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
"I see but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?"
"Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law."
Bruh
I need to know where this came from
Ah yes i watched the video too since i have eyes
@@swatteam93 a real life courtroom.
@@WednesdayMan I know that the vid claims that. I’m saying I want to see a video of this shit actually happening lmao
Real lawyers playing Ace Attorney: "This doesn't make sense. You can't do that in a real court."
Also real lawyers:
"Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
"no"
hmm
Isn't who removed the brain important to this 🤔
Dear God that doctor is so good he had me in stitches
This is an underappreciated pun
the girl in ur pfp is rlly cute where is she from?
@@inxendere moldova
@stohb it, get sumn milk bondage
"I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?"
"Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law."
*THAT BURN THO-*
2:15 I heard it is a tactic to ask simple/obvious questions like that then suddenly ask a question relevant to the case since the witness will then be more prone to answer honestly
"how long have you been working for Miss Windem?" 2 years
"And your first name is" Nicos
"and your *boyfriend's* name is" Carlos
@@cantinasmile Exactly
@@cantinasmile goddamn you. Now I need to listen to "Gay or European" again.
@@CaptainCFalcon I am not sorry :)
@@cantinasmile you shouldn't be. It's a great & catchy song.
_However it's 4:00am in the morning & I desperately need to stop spiraling down this chain of AIce Attorney videos._
"I suppose it was possible that he was alive and practicing law."
Now thats a burn and a half.
When you get lost and start pressing every single line of dialogue:
Some of them are actually quite smart, like the date of birth one, the others sound exactly like joke options
I WAS GETTING LAID
ur mom
Not same
This was honestly one of my favorite parts 😂😂😂
"I NEED A NEW ATTORNEY..."
- Every Phoenix Wright client ever.
"When's your birthday?"
"XXXX"
"What year?"
"Every year"
is straight out of Hot Fuzz
Man, the doctor put that lawyer back to coma, that burn was sick.
university makes you smarter!
university law degrees:
Therapist: Front-facing Lang doesn't exist. It can't hurt you.
Front-facing Lang: 1:36
"I see, but could the patient have been alive, nevertheless?"
"Yes, it's possible that he could have been alive and practising law."
Forget a burn, that was full on arson!
“Were you alone or by yourself at the time of the murder?”
Guys, you’re giving me too many options, I’m only one man here
"Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law."
RIP Apollo
He was burned to death
Me: “I’m not smart enough to be a lawyer.”
Lawyers:
"He could be alive and practicing law"
SPEECH 100 MOMENT
3:04 Something is clearly wrong
oh shit it's u/HornyApollo
Klavier is pregnant??
@@EarlyOwOwl thanks for this not terrifying at all image
@@EarlyOwOwl Klavier, did you lay this egg?
🏳️⚧️?
1:56 this entire string of stupidness is just flat out amazing
2:18 I'm also born on 8th june and can confirm that, in fact, I do have a birthday every year
"He was wearing a mask"
"What was he wearing under the mask?"
"Uh... His face?"
*_A MASK OF MY OWN FACE. I'D WEAR THAT_*
edit: why does this have 255 likes
I LOOK INTO MY EYE HOLES WHAT DO I SEE
sans
Fellow ace lemon demon fan, I see
"Yes there's a chance he could've been alive and practicing law" YOU FUCKING KILLED HIM DOC, HES FUCKING DEAD
“Oh”
Is the only proper response after asking these questions
Layton’s little “Oh” gets me every time.
If you're wondering why lawyer's do this, it's not because they're actually stupid, but rather because of the way court works. Not all testimony is created equally, so lawyers often play the part of some dumbass that needs things explained in no uncertain terms because that way the witness' testimony and therefore the record will clearly state as such in no uncertain terms. Implication doesn't go on the record, if you're going to bring something up you very well better be able to quote it, so lawyers like to be absolutely clear, even if it should be 'obvious'.
As crazy as it seems, until that doctor says "I was certain the guy was dead", then you can't bring it up later, and calling someone to the stand twice is a big pain. What's more, by asking all those later questions ("How many autopsies have you performed on dead people?") it adds credibility to the witness' testimony. The man had done a ton of autopsies and each one had been performed on dead bodies, establishing that he was an expert and therefore qualified to speak as an expert on such a matter.
Also, someone can't perjure themselves through implication. The attacker might have been wearing a mask, but until the witness clarifies that they never saw what was under it, then later if that guy had at some point taken off his mask and the witness saw it, the answer "he was wearing a mask" which only _implies_ the witness didn't see the guy's features would not be considered perjury. Until the witness testifies in no uncertain terms that he never saw what was under that mask, you can't come back with a Pheonix Wright style "But you said he had a big nose!" to catch him in a lie.
What's more, if you're _trying_ to get someone to perjure themselves, it's best to have them lie as much as you can get them to, so when you do the big reveal it does the most damage possible. The concept ties back to credibility. The more credible you can make a witness seem, the more weight their testimony will have, but if you can destroy that credibility, you can ruin a lot of very hard work. It's just good strategy that if your opponent is digging themselves in a hole that you help them along, or at least not stop them.
In other words, all this is actually the mark of a _good_ lawyer, not an incompetent one.
That being said, it's usually not a good idea to 'accuse' the witness of hiding information, since that could be considered badgering the witness. And some of these questions could have certainly been worded better...
1:26
*There is one enby among us*
"Yes,It is possible he could have been alive and practicing law"
Good thing he's already on court cause he just commited a *MURDER!*
Ok but that practicing law roast was so impressive like damn you didn't need to go that harsh on the dude.
Everytime I die with the "yes, it's possible that he was still alive and practicing law" and you cant tell me half if these are not canon
The “Can I get a new attorney?” Is so underrated
This is seriously eye opening. Up until now I believed, Ace Atttourey/Gyakuten Saiban series, often goofy, courtroom humour, is someting that could never happen in RL court. Now I'm inclined to believe Capcom staff (and yes, I mean Shu Takumi and Takeshi Yamazaki, among others) were inspired by seeing some really idiotic situations, in an actual court of law.
Saw this in my youtube feed. Thanks for the video.
anytime
"He was of medium height and had beard"
*HOLD IT*
"You tried to hide the suspect gender, what was his gender?"
"Try to guess buddy"
That conversation killed me 😂😂😂
2:38 ah hell nah I'd be demanding a new attorney 💀
The 2nd one actually seems like something that would be said in an AA game to turn the case around
1:00 burn.
I'm confused about this could I get an explanation
@@aidanrogers6767 try to backtrack like, 10 seconds
@@aidanrogers6767 he said that the patient whose brain has been removed is practicing the law, implying that the lawyer asking if the body was alive (which needs to be dead to be made an autopsy) could be his patient because he has no brain is alive and practicing the law.
@@soyalguienqueestamuyaburri8396 dude he meant that
The dead guy's brain is practicing law. As roast to the lawyer
I can just picture Sam Riegel cracking up in a recording studio while trying to read these lines in his Phoenix voice.
"he said he had to kill me"
"Did he?"
Looks like you’ve been blessed by the algorithm lol. Thank you for making this glorious abomination. I hope you’re feeling better
1:28 look at layton, being NB inclusive, we stan
Darn it, I've been beaten to this comment! Really _really_ glad to see it got hearted, though!!
@Curtis Williams gosh you're intelligent. Impregnate me.
@Curtis Williams ok Curtis
Curtis Williams can you not
Curtis Williams can you not be a waste of oxygen
I feel a lot better after watching this, I'm an aspiring lawyer and after seeing that the bar is on the FLOOR I can't tell yall how happy I am.
0:51 was an absolute violation
1:24 This one I can sort of understand, because anything to the tune of, "So, three girls?" might be considered leading the witness. Presumably the genders were of some importance in this case, and thus had to be on the record.
Since I haven't had occasion to comment until now: I love these videos and watch them way too much. Thanks for making them!
2:04 that actually makes sense cause it was possible the person got to know about the victim only after their death. Like they stumbled upon the corpse
Pro tip: Most of these are meant as trick questions. These lawyers are trying to see if the people being questioned are able to maintain a consistent, and therefore likely honest, story.
this is officially the first video I watched in 2021
1:28 given the current state of world, i wouldn't be too surprised by this question.
Look at Apollo's smug face at 2:55
3:04 APOLLO NOT A VIRGIN CONFIRMED
Can I get a new attorney?
TheTerraBlade42 hey you never know they could have been non binary
@@thepriestunknown3999 that was exactly my thought!
@@thepriestunknown3999 Sex wise they were female..That’s the point..If they weren’t males they had to be females aka XX not XY.
I don’t blame her for wanting a new attorney-
“Yes, it is possible he could still be alive and practicing law” OW
0:18 ok this clip was golden. That punchline at the end amazing
This is gold.
The second one is better but that doesn’t make this one less good.
“Yes, it is possible that he could be alive and practicing law.”
Damn, that’s probably the greatest courtroom burn I’ve ever heard
The brain on the desk one got me lol
"so you had 2 cars, and someone stole one of them"
"Yeah"
"So how many cars you had after one of them was stolen?"
Professor Layton in the first clip is just out here practicing enby inclusion, be nice to him he's doing the Lord's work
April did nothing wrong
Right, that's what I thought!
Bruh my date of birth is June 8...lol
I'll be sure to wish you a happy birthday on June 8
@@Chessete awwww thank youuu❤️
What year?
@@demiryumruk1423 early 2000s
@@makaylaellison7565 every year silly
"can i get a new attorney?" part was delightful
"When was your birth?''
''June 8th''
''What year?''
''Every year''
They say that each year this guy on his birthday suddenly returns to work with a 'whole new body' as if he was born different each year
Yeah that was pretty dumb from the defendant. He asked a date of birth, not the freaking birthday...
It seems he got a little bit too confident making a fool out of the lawyers because of his first mistakes leading him up to mess up himself :v
this is the video that got me into ace attorney, and eventually lead me to playing the games
so i'd like to return to say thanks
Sorry for throwing you down the rabit hole
1:16 idk man maybe he was checking if any were nonbinary
"Did he kill you?"
Yes. Yes he did. He lopped off my head, ripped out my spinal column, proceeded to skip rope with it and buried my corpse in a backwater creek in Arkansas! You've been talking to my ghost this entire time!
1:30 Layton was actually being sensitive and politically correct here
I've even seen the meme that you got these from and the delivery here is even better
I thought you have to be smart to enter the law school?
Hopefully, but when you consider that anyone regardless of their academic background can attempt to study law, its not surprising some stupid falls through the cracks.
Not really. Just like you can be dumb as hell and still pass medical school. You just need a good memory, tolerance for completing lots of paperwork, and the ability to study for some exams. Also basic ability to perform your duties.
Nahh If that was the case I wouldn't be in my third year in law right now
I am SO HAPPY this popped up on my recommended. PLEASE DO MORE I LOVE IT
The Autopsy one is hilarious, but there actually have been instances where people were still alive shortly before an autopsy and some lives were even saved due to the doctors having to check again. Just a fun fyi
I like that you bookended the video with doctors being asked about their autopsy patients' deaths.
:') Ok you got me there! I didn't even need audio to smile really hard! :)
"what was he wearing under the mask"
"uh, his face" 💀
“Lightning round” oh no 😂
I don't know what's funnier, turning these into Ace Attorney quotes (using sprites from Investigations 2!) or the fact that people actually said these things in court.
I just want to add, the lawyers aren’t necessarily dumb, they might just be starting out and had gotten stressed out 😔
"did you check for breathing"
"no"
"so he couldve survived"
"ofcourse not"
Layton just indirectly said enby rights
I was thinking that, too.