The person who can help you stop narcissistic abuse and the people who cannot

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  • Опубликовано: 28 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 432

  • @sreenathatirunarayanapura9296
    @sreenathatirunarayanapura9296 Год назад +223

    Nobody understands narcissistic abuse unless they experience it first hand

    • @RamonaJones-h6f
      @RamonaJones-h6f Год назад +15

      So true

    • @ZenZone-li4fr
      @ZenZone-li4fr Год назад +11

      Without a doubt the absolute truth. ✨️

    • @muma6559
      @muma6559 Год назад +16

      because you just can't make it up. No one on earth would ever come up with something so abnormal

    • @tammylines2779
      @tammylines2779 Год назад +3

      i I actually got to witness this happening today when I walked into a place today and say hi to my friend At like 1:something and there four people sitting around eating and i complemented the one girl on her hair and out Of the clear blue it’s all started there was the victim there and the narcissist first time ever seen being played out in front of me but not me really being involved other than saying she had beautiful hair with long hair with Curls and the one that now know is a narcissist all the sudden that’s over the other girl her hair wasn’t as pretty and said not you and started on her by saying that she was too Sensitive I am saying quit being a crybaby and keep on with Horse remarks and the girl lost her Appetite and couldn’t finish her sandwich and at that point she left and went out , i could feel her hurt i can’t count How many times i had lost my at my mom and stepfathers dinner table i would just get up and go to my room , meanwhile the narcissist was still inside bad mouthing her and she was outside all because she wasn’t complement on her hair , they all 4 left when i comes down to it the narcissist is the Sensitive one and i never seen these people before narcissistic have became a Transparent piece of glass to me i now see through them and when they see that i see through them then that look in there eyes Says it all i am literally up fed up with them. don’t get mad i keep come and just disappear with out anybody Noticing, my gold is heaven

    • @mrsjackson6363
      @mrsjackson6363 9 месяцев назад +3

      facts! NOBODY.

  • @UnstableYT-u7k
    @UnstableYT-u7k Год назад +220

    Many trained professionals cannot help you because they haven’t gone through what you’ve been through. What they’ve learned only through textbooks will only be a waste of time and money for you and some of them are narcissists themselves.

    • @carla89cc
      @carla89cc Год назад +18

      That's right.. i agree

    • @Glorydancer333
      @Glorydancer333 Год назад +11

      Amen to that!

    • @nickieglazer33
      @nickieglazer33 Год назад +9

      So true

    • @lela888
      @lela888 Год назад

      I had a friend who was a “counselor”. Turns out she has narcissistic traits. Not friends with her anymore.

    • @candace8167
      @candace8167 Год назад +7

      if I could give you 1000 likes smhsmhsmh

  • @williampicton7072
    @williampicton7072 Год назад +36

    Narcissists are everywhere!

    • @annaporter3442
      @annaporter3442 5 месяцев назад +4

      Once we truly heal, we realize how many narcs are out there! It's mind-blowing!!!

  • @davidyeager4617
    @davidyeager4617 Год назад +16

    My experience in religion as a child was people using Jesus to justify their enabling behavior, their refusal to stand up to anything, spinning it as that's what Jesus would do.

  • @MariaSantana-ul5wd
    @MariaSantana-ul5wd Год назад +63

    True, many can re-traumatize you and kick you when you are down. Pray first to God for guidance, the Great Physician.

    • @LION-on4gd
      @LION-on4gd Год назад +3

      🎯 A narcissist will Always hurt you hit you when you are "down" because of different reasons...

    • @MaileyMcAslan
      @MaileyMcAslan Год назад

      Re-traumatize, kick you when you’re down, when you’re trapped and extremely vulnerable. And they make YOU pay for it. They get RICH AF off their fkd up schemes.

    • @conniesmith5350
      @conniesmith5350 10 месяцев назад +3

      People who feign caring but then start starting their get over it agenda blaming and judging your process.Healing takes time and also has its up and downs.

  • @gypsythewunderdawg8640
    @gypsythewunderdawg8640 Год назад +28

    I’m so pleased that he put “trained professionals” on the list of people who CANNOT HELP YOU. 😂

  • @vedapannone631
    @vedapannone631 Год назад +55

    I want to add to #1.This group will TRIANGULATE with the person(s) hurting you!!! You know, BETRAY you. This was very traumatic. The good news is you find out who all the other victims are, except instead of saving themselves, they opted to become the mirror image of their abuser as enabling, weak cowards.

    • @emilyhurst4829
      @emilyhurst4829 6 месяцев назад +6

      Yes! Beware of the Flying Monkeys 🐒

    • @saskiavermeulen3346
      @saskiavermeulen3346 Месяц назад +2

      Never ever talk about yourself and find help in your known innercircle... .they knock you down ...

    • @LindaGreen-ox7es
      @LindaGreen-ox7es 21 день назад

      THIS!

  • @denise0777
    @denise0777 Год назад +49

    Apart from Jesus, the person who has endured narcissistic abuse and has been totally healed from it, is the one who can help another that's going through or been abused by it. You are awesome Royal We!!!

  • @LuxyFairy
    @LuxyFairy Год назад +15

    If they gossip to you they’ll gossip about you 💯

  • @alexavalentino3044
    @alexavalentino3044 Год назад +96

    Absolutely right. Thank you Kevin. No empathy from close family when I needed their support the most.

    • @salonsavy6476
      @salonsavy6476 Год назад +7

      So relatable

    • @deborraholiveri6202
      @deborraholiveri6202 Год назад +6

      Dr. Carter, Dr. Ramani have been extremely helpful and supportive. I recommend them highly.
      I also recommend Paula , her channel is Narc Con. Recently became a subscriber and she's excellent !
      Knowledge is power 🌹 💪 !

    • @TMoniq
      @TMoniq Год назад +5

      They automatically take the side of someone they don't even know it experienced. I recently lost my Narc Paternal donor and I did not go to the funeral service. The person I was sharing this with, cut me off and didn't even allow me share.
      That person is cut!

    • @yehmen29
      @yehmen29 9 месяцев назад +2

      You also have to be careful. They may warn your abusers that you are talking to other people about what happened, and that you may be considering pressing charges if you were victim of a crime and are still within the statute of limitations. Be also careful of the medical and legal professionals you confide to, and of course of schoolteachers, priests, members of your church...

    • @emilyhurst4829
      @emilyhurst4829 6 месяцев назад +1

      Me too! 😢

  • @jemilsense3972
    @jemilsense3972 Год назад +75

    Kevin is a coach, prophetic, and Holy Spirit lead. Yes, you are helping tremendously!

    • @Avashaw-s6v
      @Avashaw-s6v Год назад +3

      I agree. I have experienced all of these toxic behaviors and actions. I believe the Lord is using Kevin..

    • @NextLineIsMine
      @NextLineIsMine Год назад +2

      Kevin is brilliant but not a messenger of God, he doesn't need to be.

  • @renatawach743
    @renatawach743 10 месяцев назад +5

    I agree with you in 100%!!! I agree with every topic! Thank you so much. For not promoting naive compassion, for showing people how to think healthy!!!

  • @robinchilds7492
    @robinchilds7492 Год назад +25

    You and Dr. Ramani have helped a lot. I didn't realize what narcissists were capable of until I watched your videos.

  • @orangecat1672
    @orangecat1672 Год назад +15

    Spot on about the Christian church . I met my ex narc husband at church & literally have only one friend from my church circle since I divorced. Wolves in sheep clothing . I thank God this sheep has found greener pasture .

    • @Mantras-and-Mystics
      @Mantras-and-Mystics Год назад +2

      Amen. 🙏

    • @GC09Summer
      @GC09Summer 3 месяца назад

      same here! met him at church, now i don't want to go to that church and i'm not... married 7 months now but feels like forever!😢

  • @2rhythms
    @2rhythms 11 месяцев назад +7

    In church, they’ll diagnose you with unforgiveness, lack of faith, lack of prayer.

  • @frosted8904
    @frosted8904 Год назад +45

    This video is another classic Kev. So true about the churches today

  • @maritzatorres8332
    @maritzatorres8332 2 месяца назад +5

    OMG!!! I'VE NEVER LAUGH SO HARD!!! "They diagnosed me with ADHD" I LOVEEEEE THIS MAN!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @gwendolynwehage6336
    @gwendolynwehage6336 Год назад +10

    Amen, amen, the church is often an abuser. I have been abused by these people who like to "pride" themselves as good and kind while demeaning the victims of mean people. The Lord has made it clear how much is wrong with the modern Christian church and most of what we do is not Biblical at all in any form. Thankfully this does not drive me away from Christ only closer to Him. I have come out of the organized apostate church to have a fuller relationship with Jesus Christ.

  • @katd1845
    @katd1845 Год назад +54

    OMG I'm 3 minutes in and you are so on point. It's ridiculous how on point you are

    • @feliciajoy4433
      @feliciajoy4433 9 месяцев назад +3

      Yes. Truth Is Truth. Love him

    • @annaporter3442
      @annaporter3442 5 месяцев назад

      ​@@feliciajoy4433 we realize how much we have been lying to ourselves and betraying ourselves when we hear the real truth!

  • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
    @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад +2

    They disappeared once he left the house- it was a comfort for them to hear how sh-t things were for me. Smugness secured- once he was out of the house- I seem to have been a big threat- potential husband stealer!!
    Thank you so much for saying about the gossiper, I have a friend who starts “very concerned conversations” only then to divulge other peoples very private problems. My problem was extrem naivety. Church yes!
    Kevin you are on the ball.

  • @MaileyMcAslan
    @MaileyMcAslan Год назад +8

    13:34 Amen! Never put your faith in man, only God. Jesus is the only one worthy of our faith and trust. He is gladly the ultimate scapegoat and the conqueror survivor.

  • @llb6234
    @llb6234 3 месяца назад +6

    A retired policeman"s wife was very helpful and a great listener. She had a murder in her family and was used to hearing about real life situations. On the other hand I lost friends who didn't want to hear about it even though my narc is an in-law who lives far away. My husband only wanted to hear about it once and is on my side. He may underestimate the gravity of the situation.

  • @GreenBean3141
    @GreenBean3141 9 месяцев назад +5

    When I was getting “ professional help “ the therapist told me to have compassion for his hardships from childhood. I spent yrs being abused with the mindset of I need to have compassion because of his childhood trauma. RUclips has helped me understand how f*ed up that was……….

  • @DonnaBurke-p7b
    @DonnaBurke-p7b 5 месяцев назад +4

    Oh my goodness! I’ve been running away from narcissistic people forever.. before they knew what one was. I’m now a mess, don’t know whether I’m coming or going and no one will listen.. I still don’t know what to do.. I’ll just keep listening.. to you. That’s a good start. Thank you.

  • @phyllisandpaullenz4461
    @phyllisandpaullenz4461 Год назад +22

    Kevin is straight-forward and tells you what you really need to hear. It is also obvious he has experienced what he is talking about. I am shocked when he describes exactly what I went, or am going through. His video, " Be honest with Yourself" gave me the courage to go no-contact by saying, "I didn't like it and I don't want to go back". It's a great start on my massive journey.

  • @bpassion4fashion581
    @bpassion4fashion581 10 месяцев назад +6

    Omg!!!!!! Yes! I can’t believe it when I bring up narcissistic abuse and I encounter this sentence “ We ALL have good and bad “ 😫😫😫😫😫
    I know I am not a saint but trust me I don’t go around preying on other people’s goodness.
    And you are right ! Dr. Ramani and Dr. Les Carter are very validating !

  • @TMoniq
    @TMoniq Год назад +14

    As to why I did not talk with a therapist. These videos have been my therapy and healing these past almost 4 yrs "No Contact".

    • @Pam-u2n
      @Pam-u2n 3 месяца назад +2

      Same!

  • @earthrooster1969
    @earthrooster1969 Год назад +10

    Jordan Peterson...i started liking him and then greatly annoyed ...he would qualify in my opinion a person who says a lot about thiings as he LOVES to listen to his own voice 😊

  • @LastMinuteMinistry
    @LastMinuteMinistry 10 месяцев назад +4

    20 years of therapy, landed me being blue sheeted, INDUSTRY FAIL! 3 months of deliverance prayers: HEALED!!!

  • @NcScbeach1
    @NcScbeach1 Год назад +34

    My entire family are all in a narcissistic allegiance with my narcissistic dad and have even gone so far to get my grown son to betray me. Strange because my son encouraged me to leave the craziness. He’s now told my therapist that reached out to him that “The Family” has decided to let that ship sail. P.S. My mom died in February and she said she couldn’t live in the evil that was going on! She wept over their souls and was so sorry that she didn’t have the strength to get through. I told her that she is loved by so many people. She told me that the Lord said he was taking her Home. She died with a heavy heart knowing they sold off all of my things! And the Church was the worst! The true Christians stood up against my dad and siblings but the others were mute. Oh and she saw my dad for who he truly was…,.A Narcissist

    • @walkingwithheather
      @walkingwithheather Год назад +6

      Would you ever think of suing them for selling your property? Going through something very similar and may have to take things further.

    • @LisaLee__
      @LisaLee__ Год назад +5

      Jeez. I'm literally in the same position except everyone enables the king narcissist, my mother. All of my siblings, my ex husband and daughters father, and his mother and sister! And now they've turned my daughter against me. And LORD FORGIVE ME but she is showing traits herself but she is becoming a teen so certain things are to be expected but idk, it's gone far. I don't recognize my child. I raised her alone for 12 years and suddenly her dad comes back in the picture and I have lost her.
      Lord please help us. Please please please.
      I'm so alone and I am so sorry you are so alone. It's so... It's the twilight zone. It's a waking nightmare.

    • @w8what575
      @w8what575 Год назад +3

      My 16 year old is being like that after every last person I had around me decided boundaries weren’t gonna fly and let me know how big of a pos I am to them.,,he’s mad and stormed off to “smash” the oculus I found for a good deal and could finally afford to get him one….I get zero financial help or any help from his dad or anyone else so I had to bust my butt to afford this thing for him…im the only one who gets him a birthday gift or Christmas gift but nope….not good enough…I told him to go ahead I don’t care anymore…about to just pack a bag and leave for good and let him do whatever he wants cuz apparently it’s hell living under my roof…as his brother used to say..3 bots and a cot are better then living with her…he literally got whatever he wanted and did nothing in return…he got a 17% in school and they passed him for donating blood as a bribe ….because they felt bad for him cuz I am such a bad mother…I’ve been scapegoated so badly I can’t even go to the store without someone giving me an aggressive look or snide comment…smaller city of 7,500 people so I’m never gonna get an equal opportunity ever in this area so I’m just gonna leave…check out from society for good

    • @kathleenobrien6088
      @kathleenobrien6088 Год назад +2

      ​@@LisaLee__I'm truly sorry for what you are going through. The loneliness is so challenging

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Год назад +3

      I can relate all my ramaining relatives have narcissistic tendencies, my n father and grandmother have already passed away but even like that only narcs seem to come my way - at workplaces, friends, romantic interests. But still, I do have Hope and i wont ever going to lose my trust and faith. Reading the New Testament eases my pain.

  • @Grgiana071
    @Grgiana071 Год назад +8

    EXACTLY.
    I asked helped with my brothers about my abuse husband. YEP, my brothers squeezed my saving as atm machine. Even professional one, using alarm for ending the consultation otherwise she will give me extra charge $$.

  • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
    @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад +1

    Another 2 people- Jerry Wise and Lundy Bancroft. Excellent information.
    Jordon Peterson - wish him well from a distance- as in your head and away from his materials.

  • @zsuzso7
    @zsuzso7 Год назад +10

    The one type of person who can help is a person who is able to listen

  • @martinmajewski27
    @martinmajewski27 Год назад +28

    This moved me when you talked about your childhood psychological diagnosis and how no one cared about the environment you grew up in, or your parents. I had a similar experience where I was diagnosed with anxiety, but no one paid attention to the fact that it was all because of my narcissistic parents. My father used to walk around the house with a knife when I was 5, he even cut up a jacket he bought with my mother's hard-earned money. As a small child, I had to witness such pathetic scenes. My father abused me, destroyed and broke my things in front of me, and I never understood why he did it... he even stole my savings, which were just a 5-6-year-old's pocket money/savings. I went to high school with kids who had similar issues. It turned out that half of them also had difficult families, but back in the 90s, no one talked about narcissism. A friend from high school had a terrible father who also tormented her. Unfortunately, she couldn't handle it and committed suicide. I found out that after high school, she stayed in the same house with her father until she was 25 years old... the girl simply couldn't cope.

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Год назад +5

      May her gentle soul rest in Heaven

    • @PaulHanson-zo5qj
      @PaulHanson-zo5qj Год назад +2

      So sad

    • @lightwinsoverdarkness
      @lightwinsoverdarkness Год назад +6

      I saw this during my time in education. The thing that helped my students the most was to create a safe environment in the classroom. I also kept a close watch on my students and would ask them direct questions if something seemed out of sorts. We had some very good counselors in most of the schools as well as a social worker/crisis counselor who we could refer students.

    • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
      @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад

      Some of my teachers made the biggest difference in my life.

  • @jamnoise72
    @jamnoise72 Год назад +10

    Lets not forget
    Lisa A Romana and Tamie M Joyce
    They are 2 kick ass spiritual warriors that made it through!!

  • @gillianford9208
    @gillianford9208 Год назад +18

    This is so true!
    The channels that have helped me are:-
    Dr Les Carter, The Royal We, Dr Ramani, Ross Rossenberg, Richard Grannon, Joanne Kujath, Inner Integration, Sam Vaknin, Jerry Wise and Lisa Romano.
    Some have written books and run courses which are incredibly helpful!
    They are very different characters but you can feel their deep personal awareness of the horror of narcissistic abuse.
    I cannot thank each of them enough for helping me navigate through the pain of it. You just know that they know and the fact they are so different makes it even more helpful!
    As Jerry Wise said on his channel "you cannot apply normal rules to abnormal situations".

    • @kellylough1569
      @kellylough1569 Год назад +2

      check out
      Joe B. House who is at the level of Royal We

    • @katja6332
      @katja6332 Год назад +2

      Great list ❤ I want to add Lundy Bancroft. He doesn't speak about narcissism but about toxic relationships and how it looks like and how to stay healthy and psychological sane. The book ", daily wisdom, why does he do that" is incredibly straightforward and honest.

    • @jackskelington7377
      @jackskelington7377 9 месяцев назад +2

      That's a good list. Just finished watching a bunch of Jerry Wise's videos. I like how he stresses that NC isn't the end all be all like some YT influencers say it is.

  • @theworldneedsyou111
    @theworldneedsyou111 Год назад +10

    Personal experience, one coaching session with Kevin and an incredible beautiful shift took place after decades of trying to deal with narcissism in others. If you want to be babied and coddled, Kevin’s true coaching is not for you. If you want to find direction and purpose and have an open heart and mind, you need to try a coaching session with him.
    Always in gratitude - blessings to you Kevin, for the thousands you are helping !🙏🏻🤗🙌🏻

  • @godschildyes
    @godschildyes 11 месяцев назад +7

    I am so glad that you put a highlight on the church and it's role in cornering people to stay in abousive relationships, and also Dr. Jordan Peterson who I fully believe lives in the reality of someone who is highly educated and confuses. Too much study can make a person err. I think Solomon in the Bible mentioned something like that.

  • @maryjanethomas2380
    @maryjanethomas2380 Год назад +9

    This is so true! A narc will attract other narcs and they get along great! They dont like people they can’t control. I could talk all day about the abuse and Carnegie these people leave behind

    • @LION-on4gd
      @LION-on4gd Год назад

      They don't like not having the control because they are afraid that it will come out what they do did..they know very well what they did do!!

  • @wonderfulrafita
    @wonderfulrafita Год назад +8

    I agree with your three points. Just an observation: Dr. Ramani is great, a pioneer, but she’s said a couple of wild things too the last three years, trying to correlate people behavior and their decisions to narcissism. Thank you!

    • @cyndigooch1162
      @cyndigooch1162 11 месяцев назад

      @wonderfulrafita I'm glad you mentioned issues with Dr Ramani because I had an upsetting experience with her a long time ago, so unsubscribed from her channel, then felt much better. I'd noticed that something wasn't right, IMHO, before that anyway.
      I'm aware that this could be classed as gossiping, hence why I'll leave it at that! I've heard people say simliar things and read comments about it though, which is validating.
      I want to add that I realise that Dr Ramani is extremely popular and has assisted thousands of people over the years, but it doesn't mean that everyone has to worship her. 😊

  • @maryam-rx2hu
    @maryam-rx2hu Год назад +15

    Perfect informations
    Your perfect information based on the same experiences I almost had in my life, Dr Ramani and Dr Rosenberg together became the sun in my life and I could come out of horrible, dark prison Iwas living in .
    I still have those panic attacks about maybe 3am ,when I am deep asleep and I don't know how to overcome it, but after 5 years getting help from you miracles in my life , I am almost back to normal life.
    Thank you so much Kevin for all your help 🙏🙏🙏💞

  • @joe_mama1120
    @joe_mama1120 Год назад +16

    I sure do get you. This struggle is real. I'm once again at a very difficult cross road, my hardest one ever and I'm 62 so I've seen many. I know what my head is telling me and my heart is telling something else. Thank you for what you do, I listen to you and think wow someone really gets it.

    • @salonsavy6476
      @salonsavy6476 Год назад +4

      I’m 58 and going through the same thing

    • @gorunsko31
      @gorunsko31 Год назад +6

      I am 74 and scared it may be too late for me😢 Kevin is 💯 right but my body is getting weak. Not sure I can pull off separation in a safe manner. The N. May destroy me financially. Run when you can. Best wishes.

    • @mauricio5552
      @mauricio5552 Год назад +4

      @@gorunsko31you know been 60 like me or you 74 or anyone else at any age, I can only say my opinion on that. Let’s see someone at age 81 or me at 60 or you at 74, what’s more important in our lives, I believe it’s our decisions to live by our own wits and leaves this life with our passion and truth of what we are and not who they want you to be. Weakness, age and health, financial or any materialistic possessions cannot hold me back to fulfill my freedom, I’m speaking about my own experiences with these situations not to be an intruder, I just minding my own business and just my own experiences. Wishing you may give a thought of what just might give you another perspective.

  • @annastone5624
    @annastone5624 Год назад +14

    Kevin this is a truly important and excellent video.
    Absolute Gold. 100% agree.
    I have fought all these battles, as well as that of therapy’s over- focus on me, and reluctance to discuss the disfunction of others. But then I barely had the basis within myself, I barely had ‘self’ to understand others from.
    However I will add a caveat - anyone who has been through severe abuse, CSA, sexual abuse as an adult, extreme violence or coercion then a trained trauma therapist is vital and that can take years, because the impact is so damaging and profound.
    Once you survive the horror of recovering from that, then understanding narcissism as you describe here, is the next vital step.

  • @emilyhurst4829
    @emilyhurst4829 6 месяцев назад +3

    Mom's are the Biggest Enablers!!! Thank God my Vhurch don't put up with no bullshit! My Mother's husband is a Narc, been grooming my mother & brother. My brother is an asshole now! My Narc bf, is the least worst of.....he doesn't know it, but he protects me from my powerful & wealthy Covert Narc Step Dad. I'm Day 3 with No Contact! I changed my phone # Didn't even give it to my family!

  • @lightwinsoverdarkness
    @lightwinsoverdarkness Год назад +3

    I agree that churches aren't a safe place. As someone in ministry, I frequently refer families to outside resources and if there is any suspicion of abuse my first call is to Department of Children's services and second call is to the local Police if in town and/or Sheriff department if in county. I was forced to leave a church because a person told me and showed me physical evidence of abuse. The family forced me to leave but that was okay with me. Law enforcement arrested and prosecuted the abuser--custody change happened.
    One of my school students was being abused and his mother proudly boasted how she was abusing him when I called her to check on him. She was reported to DCS as well. When he finally ran away, she had the police hunting him. The student was hiding at school and the other students found him hiding and in bad shape. He was glad to go with the responding police officers because he was safer in police custody than at home. Thankfully, our local Judge made custody changes immediately when DCS made case. Not sure why a mother would hate her own biological progeny so much. It was so horrible to see a young man treated so badly.

  • @tammylines2779
    @tammylines2779 Год назад +4

    my stepfather turned my mother into a narcissistic , i’m awake i I am Resonate with you all the way

    • @brightspacebabe
      @brightspacebabe Год назад

      My late father was turned into a narcissist by his new wife after my mom died. I understand your situation and I’ll pray for you❤

    • @tammylines2779
      @tammylines2779 Год назад

      @@brightspacebabe thank you i will pray for you to

  • @pinkroses135
    @pinkroses135 Год назад +4

    You gotta pull out of this pit on your own. No one is coming to save you. You have a higher chance of being screwed over if you reach out. God first. Not man idols. If you need something or other human beings He will provide that when you ask, if it's right. If it doesn't come through that channel then you don't need it. Takes your faith to another level.

  • @Texaslonestargal
    @Texaslonestargal Год назад +4

    I had an awakening back in 2004 when I was engaged in a nasty divorce with my narcissist husband. Back then, there wasn’t a lot of information on narcissists except a blog by Sam Vaknin. Since then, my journey of healing has led me to recognize my family of origin is made up primarily of narcissists. 😭 Since then, I have distanced myself from them. Once you know, you know.

  • @raidenewalden4354
    @raidenewalden4354 4 месяца назад +1

    I listen to most of your videos and the topics are all mind blowing and so much important messages about a lot of questions that was bothering my mind for a long time .

  • @alecstuart5266
    @alecstuart5266 2 месяца назад +1

    Perfectly true Kevin.

  • @raven4090
    @raven4090 Год назад +6

    I'm sorry that happened to you as a kid. They really do need to consider the situation with a lot of kids. There's a little boy I'm sad about, who's mother gives him ADHD meds, but I think he's just traumatised from before she got him to foster. I was put on meds I shouldn't have been on when I was being harassed by my first ex husband after I tried to leave him. I kept saying, " I have good reasons to be depressed! Pills aren't going to stop him bothering me, unless you give them to him." But I hoped they would help numb the pain I was feeling. They didn't. I don't trust many professionals now. Thank you for doing these videos 🙏 God bless you 💜

    • @katja6332
      @katja6332 Год назад +2

      Yes, it's so sad. When I studied psychology back then in the nineties, my prof was helping judges when parents were divorcing, to give a psychological evaluation about the child. He says, what he did was to talk with the mother and let the child sit down and ask him to draw a picture. He showed us the pictures and it was so telling. Then he said, don't interpret it, I will read you how the child explain it to me. This was even more telling. Problem wasn't the child but the environment. If a child draws a mother with two heads, one with an angel and one with a red head, you already get the idea but when it explains the situation mom switched to dragon head, it's very hard to ignore the situation the child is in at home. And he said, he always let the child explain the picture to them without the parent around. He didn't interpret the picture but asked questions why the child chooses to draw it like that and then usually the child tells why. Few pictures are still stuck in my head. Those were the rare teachers at university that change your perspective on things forever.

  • @survivorship4290
    @survivorship4290 Год назад +17

    Excellent message, Kevin! Very helpful! 💯💕

  • @kbt5702
    @kbt5702 Год назад +3

    I need about an two hour phone call with you. I want to tell EVERYTHING from start to finish. Yes I’m out for about 1 year and need to understand something about him and myself. I can guarantee you, you’ve never heard a story like this. I promise that.

  • @walkingwithheather
    @walkingwithheather Год назад +10

    Theres really no one to help. The majority are either naive or scared. I'm the front runner, the rebel, in all of this. What I do, may lead the way for others. Thats where I am right now. My whole friggen family have shut down, except for two which revealed their Flying Monkey side last January.

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Год назад +1

      Im sure youll find your harmony eventually and there will be peace at last

  • @nickieglazer33
    @nickieglazer33 Год назад +13

    Sam Vaknin (who originally coined the term ‘narcissistic abuse’) highly recommended.
    HG Tudor (although I don’t agree with identifying as an ‘empath’) also has been beneficial in my escape, no contact and recovery.
    Both are self-aware narcissists, so zero sugar coating or magical, emotional thinking.
    Love to all survivors and those going through this. Stay strong 💪 ❤

    • @hismaelification
      @hismaelification Год назад +1

      But Sam Vaknin says coaches and gurus are not helpful...

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Год назад +3

      Sam Vaknin doesnt appeal to me much

    • @kalikodelevere5008
      @kalikodelevere5008 Год назад +3

      Yes...but i challenged Sam Vaknin on something he said which contradicted a previous video and I was promptly blocked! SO his NPD was triggered by me asking a question he felt challenged by and so he had to silence me. Shame because I like his content

    • @cyndigooch1162
      @cyndigooch1162 11 месяцев назад

      @nickieglazer7065 I totally agree about HG Tudor in regard to assisting people with no sugar coating and he was the main person who got me to accept that the last highly narcissistic ex didn't love me, or even like me, for that matter!
      I really like Lee Hammock, who is very funny at times, as well and Ben Taylor is another helpful self-aware one because nothing beats hearing it from the horse's mouth, so to speak. 😊

  • @maya_unplugged
    @maya_unplugged Год назад +6

    THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOO MUCH for pointing out about christians. I always felt so lonely with my thoughts about the religious narcs-club.

  • @gwendolynwehage6336
    @gwendolynwehage6336 Год назад +2

    The One Who has helped me was God when I prayed for answers, He told me all the things that were going on through Biblical wisdom. Coaches are great when they say the same things that God says, it helps validate what I have already heard from God.

  • @muma6559
    @muma6559 Год назад +6

    I know mothers who medicate their young sons....... because THEY have issues. It's horrendous

    • @jacquelineglitter4328
      @jacquelineglitter4328 Месяц назад +1

      They wanted my son to take meds because he was hyper. I said no and home schooled him. He was just a young kid who had a lot of energy.

    • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
      @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад

      Jacqueline - keep a long term open mind for your son. ADHD is a real neurological condition.

    • @muma6559
      @muma6559 Месяц назад +1

      @@melliecrann-gaoth4789 Jacqueline home schooled... in other words provided for her child addressing the real life issues for her son. Other mothers would have medicated their son and never addressed the root cause irritation. Children don't need drxgs, they need love and affection, good food and a good home life. Not all mothers can provide that. You did the right thing Jacqui, you prevented your child from further hyper damage. Good mothers look for the root cause, well done. I hope your son is doing great now

  • @Desert_Sage
    @Desert_Sage Год назад +7

    Great video 👍🏻 Appreciate your thoughts on JP and validation/empathy. So much of this resonates.

  • @BrideOfYashua
    @BrideOfYashua 7 месяцев назад +1

    HalleluYah!!! 🙌🏼praise Yah! I’ve been couching for years! I’ve been through the fire and have come out victorious! Praise Yah!🙌🏼

  • @izawaniek2568
    @izawaniek2568 Год назад +11

    Spot on Kevin! Thank you for another great analysis and brilliant advice! God bless you❤

  • @lucillekluivert343
    @lucillekluivert343 Год назад +2

    I loved this video out off all I laughed so hard that my son wanted to know why am laughing Kevin your right about what you have spoken its all true I have experienced it all I can tell on it

  • @wolfgang7812
    @wolfgang7812 Год назад +2

    Coaches have been through the narc experience. This is why they are better helpers.

  • @bellaviebravery
    @bellaviebravery 7 месяцев назад +1

    OMG SPOT ON! i am helpless since i was born. I did not know my family is toxic with Narcissistic traits. Till i married to A huge Narcissist for a decade. Then only found out the man is narcissist, i used to ask help from my family. But it got worse! Now only i realised they all are toxic with Narcissistic big traits !!! My lesson learned keep quiet like STOIC teaching don't simply tell anyone around us when we are facing the abuse. Slowly find the right tribe, right coach who are specialised in N.abuse

  • @cb7150
    @cb7150 Год назад +4

    You are right, but some trained professionals who have had first hand experience of narcissistic abuse and are interested in it are Great and are helping me now. Dr R being one of them.

    • @yuu_miran
      @yuu_miran Год назад +1

      Dr R is great i rewatch some videos until phrases are baked into my brain😅

  • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
    @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад +1

    Jerry Wise on RUclips specialises in Bowen Family Systems and does plenty of plain talking.
    Lundy Bancroft works with women in domestic abuse and in education of the general public and professionals about intimate partner abuse.

  • @Roethles
    @Roethles Год назад +7

    This is so spot on.

  • @kerrimontgomery8732
    @kerrimontgomery8732 Год назад +2

    Book smart doesn’t mean they have wisdom, wisdom only comes from God.🙏

  • @jillclark4876
    @jillclark4876 Год назад +5

    Thank you for commenting on Jordan Peterson! I picked up his book and learned VERY quickly what a misogynistic pig he really is. Just because someone can spout a few truths doesn’t mean they have character or wisdom.

  • @DOCKent-3339
    @DOCKent-3339 Год назад +3

    If you are seeing them only one time I think you are doing something right.

  • @robinchilds7492
    @robinchilds7492 Год назад +3

    My therapist never discusses my situation. She just asks me how it makes me feel.

    • @jackskelington7377
      @jackskelington7377 9 месяцев назад +1

      Maybe you should ask your therapist for some guidance? If they don't offer it and find one that does.

  • @gaurs230
    @gaurs230 Год назад +3

    Yes I suffered through a lot of emotional abuse with these people in college and even one deprogramminh these were coworkers it was colleagues they will say

  • @Emefur1
    @Emefur1 Месяц назад

    Unworldly people or naive people, “people who want to keep the peace and keep everybody happy” - I agree, they are hopeless as support and worse still if they make excuses for their behaviour, simply adding to your confusion and distress.

  • @A.S.Harfenklang
    @A.S.Harfenklang 2 месяца назад

    I was a priests daughter.... experienced what you are talking about in my family...
    Your words are very helpful.

  • @K5309
    @K5309 20 дней назад +1

    Thank you it's about mutual respect. This is definitely one of my favorite videos you have made.

  • @Mick20076
    @Mick20076 Год назад +2

    This is so true unless someone has been through the same thing they will not understand. And because someone has education doesn’t mean they no what they are talking about. That is way everyone should have a voice how because

  • @desertcrab6331
    @desertcrab6331 Год назад +4

    There is nothing more biblical that what he's saying right here. we can only receive comfort from the comfort of another who has been through the same fire and understands on a heart level. The comfort IS the understanding of everything you have experienced. The professionals didn't like Jesus much either.

  • @cherylwarren9848
    @cherylwarren9848 Год назад +3

    Thanks Kevin. I needed this video today

  • @rachelsmith3340
    @rachelsmith3340 Год назад +2

    Twin flamies 😂
    This video is so well put together, so good

  • @jacquelinetoledo5870
    @jacquelinetoledo5870 Год назад +1

    I'm not even allowed to have my own money or bank account. Can't spend unless I ask and his debt is now something I have to repay . I've been naive this whole entire time (6 years) thank God I'm waking up.

  • @maryadame44
    @maryadame44 8 месяцев назад

    Help I can’t help me , and couch.. speak directly and truth. Someone who has experienced narcissism.. I’ve always looked up to couches.. while studying them first.. the goal is to encourage lift up and create a better person.. or help a person come out of something they can’t handle.. I love me and my company.. 🕊

  • @lissab8459
    @lissab8459 2 месяца назад

    You are the first Christian in my life. Worth listening too.

  • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
    @melliecrann-gaoth4789 Месяц назад

    I got treat help from Employee Assistance Programme. The thing is he was very well trained in psychotherapy and also is a very solid person. Employee assistance is short term and solution focused, it was the first time ever I received clear and concrete psycho education. That is after years in very unhelpful and undermining and expensive therapy.

  • @shabnamrafique7730
    @shabnamrafique7730 Месяц назад

    The one person who can help me is me!

  • @user-cl6uj5bn2f
    @user-cl6uj5bn2f Год назад +2

    This is SO spot on 💯🎯

  • @Killy-o2m
    @Killy-o2m Год назад +2

    Your Heavenly Father!!!

  • @DebraWoog-lf8tp
    @DebraWoog-lf8tp 8 месяцев назад

    Patrick teahan, tim fletcher, royal we, dr. Ramsni, mel robbins, lisa a. Romano, dr. Les carter. You, however, are really incredibly helpful.

  • @lynblack7351
    @lynblack7351 6 месяцев назад

    There are a lot of mental health professionals who get targeted by narcissistic people, so we do understand. Not just by getting an education but also by going through the experience. I agree the DSM5 does not give the whole picture of what Narcissistic Personality Disorder is.

  • @mariatwachtman4962
    @mariatwachtman4962 Год назад +3

    You helped me so much! Thank you very much 🙌💞

  • @GretchenRunge-xv2hs
    @GretchenRunge-xv2hs Год назад +1

    IM SORRY IM HAVING TROUBLE SEEING!

  • @Schquirl
    @Schquirl Год назад +3

    You had said earlier this year you were going to make a video about covert narcissist pastors. I'm still waiting and praying. Thank you Oh, could you please talk about how they do smear campaigns and triangulation as well as love-bombing to deceive. Thank you

    • @Schquirl
      @Schquirl Год назад

      Please also include dog whistling in sermons and then how they enjoy making you cry 😭. Thank you

  • @tammylines2779
    @tammylines2779 Год назад +1

    getting your mind right and getting back to hobby’s

  • @MrsK632
    @MrsK632 10 месяцев назад

    I consider myself a former christian but this really resonates with me (especially calling out JP), gratitude

  • @kiernoify
    @kiernoify Год назад +1

    Nice video man, coaches defo have the experience having lived through it or wounded healers in the shamanic circles. With re. to Jordan P, I feel you may have picked him up wrong. In my experience when I really felt into myself and realised, had real-eyes, to see the power I had given away in particular, to my father, it gave me a wonderful strength to see how everyone else were actually quite weak and nothing they could do should actually phase me. That is what is then deemed as dangerous to the mainstream sleepy people like the narcissistic church or govern-ment (ment in Latin is mind). That makes awake people 'dangerous' to these narcissistic systems of power we are strangled with. And they will come to silence it. This is what JP is referring to. When you've gone through that fire, youre unstoppable, as long as you're aware ie. Samurai kinda aware. Centred, aligned, disciplined strength 💪❤️

  • @LindaLouise625
    @LindaLouise625 День назад

    Thank You soooo much!!! I have my FREEDOM :D :D :D Thank You!

  • @sportygirlplays
    @sportygirlplays 10 месяцев назад +1

    Professionals do make things worse, some are narcissists themselves being the reason why some people just won't get therapy.

  • @LS-sd3qy
    @LS-sd3qy 8 месяцев назад +1

    They will even laugh in your face at your pain

  • @sabinemann8640
    @sabinemann8640 Год назад

    So i tried Dr. other health care professionals.. and yes, coaches.. if you have not experienced a narcissist does not matter what yitle you have. Not every coach has the same experiences. The person that can help me is myself!

  • @katja6332
    @katja6332 Год назад +1

    I agree with you and would say, therapist trained in schema therapy have a good idea about narcissism by default, because they have entitlement in their schema system. At least, this is my experience. And lawyers. They have a very good understanding of narcissism and can give you great real life advice as well.

  • @joltjolt5060
    @joltjolt5060 Год назад +2

    I don't have the energy to deal with people anymore.