My Daughter is Homeless & Using Meth!
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- Опубликовано: 18 окт 2024
- My Daughter is Homeless & Using Meth!
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This is a great dad who hasn’t given up on his daughter.
I am thankful that I have a dad like this too! = )
I just celebrated 8 years clean on the 8th of this month. Recovery is possible. 💗 my poor dad watched me struggle, enabled me, and is blessed to see me totally restored and healthy with 5 beautiful kids and an awesome husband.
My son has been an addict for 12 years, he's 30 now. We put him through rehab 4 times, he's been in the ER 3 times (overdose). He lies, he's manipulative, he's narcissistic. He's not the boy I raised. I don't let him visit unless he's sober, if I suspect he's on drugs or drinking, I turn him away. My wife has enabled him for years but is realizing he's just using her. He's starting to be a little aggressive, he's gotten into a couple of fights on the streets, never been aggressive with me. It's hard, I love my boy but I can't help him if he doesn't want help.
My daughter is same
She will burn you
Drain your bank accounts
Steal everything in your house
And blame you for being homeless
My personal experience with my sister.
I haven't seen her in six years
Sad but true..my son
My personal experience with being a daughter of addicts is that there is hope, but it'll still be a challenge daily.
I get how you feel and I think most siblings feel like this. They really resent the pain the addict brought into the family. I understand how you feel as a sibling, but as a parent, I feel differently. I think most parents want to help their kids and can forgive the terrible behavior.
Got you for 18 years. 18 years. And his 18th birthday he found out it wasn’t hiiiis?
Yup this is a fact pretty much if they don't have a strong soul the person you know is a drug zombie theres no coming back.
She needs to go to rehab. He needs to go to allonon meetings. Don’t trust anything an addict says because it’s all a lie. I’ve dealt with this as a family member for now 5 years. Don’t enable and understand they will relapse over and over and over again. It’s so hard to watch and you can’t do anything to help. They have to do it themselves.
They always say that if an addicts lips are moving they are lying.
Absolutely true.
In general, no one is able to quit first time, so people do relapse. If someone is in active addiction, yes, their brain is not theirs... they will lie, steal and do whatever it takes to get the next fix. My son has been struggling for 12 years... when he is sober I have my son back, when he is using I am talking to “addiction” like an alien took over him. BTW, he’s the one that has told me when he was active in addiction ... all he thinks about is his next fix and will manipulate and lie to get it.
I'm on recovery 25 years this July. It's take s commitment and no one can do it for you
. Now my daughter is going through it..
Oh man! Prayers for Gary and his family ❤️
Mine went to rehabs but always left or got kicked out. We finally had to say no. No more. No. We cant keep paying for rehab. Wasted moneyvever single time.
I hope all your hard work pays off.
"What's your household income?" - Dave
“How much do you have in your emergency fund?”-Dave
I know your joking but to be fair I’ve watched a lot of videos and Dave’s also shown a lot of empathy and understanding as a dad and human to callers struggling. He’s admittedly not a psychologist. Cheers
You all are so mean 😂😂
Gotta sell that car
I've been on the opposite side of addiction my entire life. Alcoholic parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, childhood best friend, in-laws.....
Please get help in Al-Anon, Nar-Anon or other support group for loved ones of addicts. The best "help" you can give them is to refuse under any circumstance to become an enabler or codependent. If not, you are helping them to kill themselves. Hard truth. Prayers for you and your daughter.
Sadly almost every family deals with some type of addiction. My brother passed away from a drug overdose of heroine. Pray for that families that still have members fighting this
❤💛💛💙💜
At 22 and already had 2 kids. Oh 😔 plus the addiction.. May our Almighty God save her from that invisible prison 😔😔
I have a brother like this. You could see this coming when he was 12. Fast forward 38 years later and no one in the family has much contact and most prefer no contact.
The ironic thing: He asked me for $$, I said no to money but I would put him up for a month, groceries etc... His answer: Nope.
Good enough for me. I let him know I love him and that any relationship was conditional and those conditions were mine, not his. Haven't spoken with him in years.
Just remember....addicts are the greatest liars and manipulators in the world. They know your buttons, and they know what you want to hear.
Wow this story is so similar to my neighbor, it’s very hard to deal with 💔
That's a really tough situation.
My GF's daughter is in a very similar situation except that my GF's ex-husband is enabling the daughter's addiction by just throwing money at the daughters needs.
My GF has paid for two rehab efforts and neither has helped. It's got to the point where the trust has very specific instructions concerning the daughter.
You cannot be the savior, no matter how hard you try. Your daughter has to be the one to want help. Sounds like you're trying your best.
See as a father of 4 I can see this mans frustration and I feel for him however he hasn't given up and I always tell my kids I may not have millions and I wont live forever but while I'm on this earth I will never ever give up on any of them never!!
Do you have an addicted child?
I know this is going to be hard for some to hear and it isn’t for everyone but it was the only thing that help me...... CUT THEM OFF. Completely. An addict will only get help for one reason and one reason only, they want it!
Gary you are a great man, a wonderful father. Praying that your girl overcomes.
Maybe he should focus on his grandchildren instead of putting all his energy on her!!! But at the same time I understand what he is going through. 🙏
I don’t relate to these but find them so amazing. Your counseling is amazing
I could never not help my child. I feel for you.
Gary doesn't want to feel how ANGRY he is with his daughter. Sorry. Not feeling your anger will eat you from inside. She has probably lied, stolen, and clearly destroyed her life.
Prayers for him and his family my heart breaks for him!
Gary, I'm so sorry this is affecting your life. I agree with the commenter below that Al-Anon should be able to help you. I went when my husband was self-destructing and I needed to understand why and how to take care of myself while I was figuring it all out.
Just prayed for Father and Daughter
Plz, plz never give up on your loved ones.. doesnt mean you should enable addiction, or force sobriety.. unfortunately it takes time before someone is ready to change, keep your boundaries strict, but your heart needs to stay open.
Meth is one of the hardest drugs for anyone to get off and stay off, unfortunately. It's possible but the person has to make the decision for themselves, and has to completely leave their old life and ways behind. Like move to another state and leave all old friends and connections behind permanently. Otherwise will eventually get sucked back in. I wish this man and his daughter good luck.
Get her into " Teen Challenge"....they have a 98% success rate! It's a nationwide, residential treatment program for teens and adults too. They create a FAMILY in the home they are all living in. They teach them tools for life, like cooking, budgeting, making good decisions. Find them jobs, etc. Its AMAZING!!!! (And very very affordable!)
Yes! It’s teen and ADULT Challenge. They do have programs for men, women and teens.
They don't even say they have a 98% success rate, even with their inflated numbers. Talk about lying...
“Not why the addiction but why the pain.”
Addiction starts and ends with pain.
-Dr Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction
Can’t recommend this book enough to caller (read Dr Mate’s bio esp his time on street w/meth addicts.) My heart breaks for this dad. I’ve lost loved ones to addiction. She’s need help to know and do the ‘right thing’. Addiction wins most of the time. Rock bottom can be a place to push back up from. Life isn’t a success only journey and more so for detox/recovery. So glad he reached out to Dr D who’s always professional and compassionate. Pls don’t lose these gifts on your path to world class communicator. Stay real.
Just listening to him, the pressure I can hear in his voice.....
@Heinrich Himmler No he didn’t. SHE made the choice to use. She failed, not him.
That's a rough place to be in. Man im sorry.
You did a great job as a father I know exactly what you are going through you need to do what best for you I did it for 5 years nothing change and 10 years later nothing change so please take care of you and your grand children only if she go to rehab for 9 months then you can help
He should focus on the grandchildren and get himself a support group.
An addict can check themselves in with social services and a community rehab program any day of the week
I had a friend who started using drugs at 13 years old. His use became addiction, and he ended up ODing on fentanyl and dying in 2021. The hardest part about watching someone go through it is knowing that it is solely their battle to fight, and you can do little to help them. Most hard drug addicts end up losing the war, sooner or later. Hopefully this young woman is the exception to the rule.
There’s no kind of ppl on earth as manipulative at meth junkies. They know exactly what to say to make you think they want to change. Let them go.
Also for anyone who doesn’t know. Do not give junkies gift cards, ever. They cash them in. I gave my ex husband a Subway gift card because he made me feel so guilty that he was hungry. Within minutes he cashed it in through an app on his phone. I contributed to his addiction thinking I was helping him eat.
I got the tough love bs cause I tried smoking pot as a teen.
Hated me as it is, ran away never went back. Over 40 yrs ago
Dont adopt unless you truly see them as your own.
Dave Ramsey : so you mentioned she has a car, can she deliver pizzas at night?
Although you are being funny, that is actually a good solution. Keep your kids busy and maybe they won’t have time for drugs.
He can get her in the emergency room and do a involuntary admittion in the psychward. Once she's in the psychward talk to her social worker about the medical card so you dont have to pay for this and rehab and you can also get her to sign a paper at the pyschward that gives you access to her medical info and further treatment. We did this to my mom, she isnt a drug addict but has a mental illness. She isnt mentally fit to handle this on her own. Id rather have my relative alive than dead on the streets. Dont fund her financially but admit her so she can get help.
Depends on the state.
He can't "do" an involuntary admission. That would have to be done by a psychiatrist who sees her as a danger to herself or others. Considering how limited space is in psych wards is, addiction isn't likely to result in an admission.
Good for you John
Rice&beansBeans&rice
Once a drug addict always a drug addict. You either accept bad behavior (which you have been doing) or you don't accept bad behavior. Nothing does work. You can't cure a drug addict. What rehabilitation gives you tools to cope with addiction. Not your primary responsibility. Find a parent support group. And move on. Texas has some wonderful recovery opportunities. You can't make this about you or your deceased wife or your grand kids. This has to be your daughter's own journey. The hardest part is really letting go.
Honor your other daughter
Addicted will always have excuses why they can’t quit. I know they wouldn’t let ANY of those same excuses stop them from getting drugs. We are in a horrible crisis in this country. China is killing our people with fentanyl! Please, everyone talk to your children about the dangers of taking even just one pill!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God Bless you sir, you’re so insightful and companionate.
You did too much but you are a great father
She would realize and grown up so sorry
Dave: “start delivering pizzas ..”
You dont have the tools to help her her problems are too big to handle we are not counselor
She needs to go to meeting and has to be ready to surrender to god.
She better live in a state that banned abortion or I have no respect for her having a kid knowing she is the way she is. I am an addict myself. Literally 22 and am 4 months sober, like I said no respect for people who have kids in this condition, you KNOW your fucked up and you still being a kid into this world, you had a good family, she was lucky
Is sounds like huge doing a good job of loving her the best you can but she is gonna have to reach rock bottom to the point of where the pain of recovery is going to be less than the pain of continuing her addiction before she changes this. It sounds like hes dealing with a lot of negative feelings and a motions and trauma that she just didn't know how to handle as a child I don't know exactly what got her into drugs it could have just been an accident But either way for a time they helped her cope.
So sad. You can’t do anything, it hurts to see your kids spiral down. I understand. Bless this guy. I had to kick him out.
Take the car away before she kills someone. Yes John, you can let her sleep in a parking lot. There are faith-based rehabs so dad doesn't blow his retirement. I have hope but we have lived it 14 years. It's in God's hands not ours. Success rates are not high.
State insurance to I would think like medi-cade
If she's been using since 14 and dad just found out 6+ years later.... it was failed parenting and its kinda at a point of no return as she HAS to want to help herself.
These children are in REBELLION and do what they want. Has NOTHING to do with how they are raised.
It’s always the crowd that they hang out with and boyfriend/girlfriend who they lay down with.
@@go_off_Sis You are correct.
@@go_off_Sis it can also be a way to deal with trauma. That’s what my son did. He was able to hide a lot because his father and I were divorced.
No no no
All the daughter want to do is reconnect to the cash cow. Keep your distance and allow the full rock bottom.
I refuse to help addicts, even when they ask for help. They put themselves in that situation, let them figure it out.
Dad cannot do anything at all to help
She has to want it that bad and do it herself.
Gonna have to turn his back the ol tough love. Its the only way in this case.
Girls gonna wind up dead or in prison
If homeless how does she afford the meth?
because saving up for good things doesn't cross their mind- they just want more drugs immediately
How do you think ? 😳
Hmmm
What does an in patient detox and treatment program cost?
Dude, knarly... he a doctor? Lol
What model of car?
Where was he when she was doing drugs at 14?
They hide it very well. Don’t be a hater. Clearly you must have some serious skeletons in your closet. Be kind and supportive or keep your words to yourself.
How is your daughter homeless if you have a house , I am 24 and I live with my parents
She doesn't want to live by reasonable rules I would imagine. Or she got mad and left. Now that she's gone I would imagine he won't let her come back because her behavior is too destructive, at least that's the way it usually is.
I would kick my kids out on their 18th birthday. If they don't have a plan, that's their problem.
@@damemethief shouldn't have kids , cause they didn't ask to be born, you had them for selfish reasons now they have to live a miserable life, you couldn't even give them a luxurious lavish life atleast do the bare minimum and let them live in your house until they find a job they love
This is the video that makes me unsubscribe. Too much negativity and non financial questions coming from the Ramsey channels. Best of luck
This is a psychologist, you realize that right? You also realize money and people’s lives are extremely intertwined. This guy has “sunk” his finances in his daughter and needs help.
This is a completely different channel with different goals.
He should put the dog on Ebay and the cat on Craigslist!
This guy remember if ex military guy can't get a real job so he on radio whining yes know nothing.