Sexuality expert explains how to deal with fluid urges in a relationship
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- Опубликовано: 10 июн 2024
- Are you in a relationship but struggle with same gender urges? Do you worry that you want something different to your partner?
Perhaps you are bisexual and feel different attractions that different times, or maybe your sexuality is fluid.
Many people struggle with gay urges or homosexual urges in their relationships. It can feel scary because we worry what it means about us.
But don’t worry, this video explains how you can deeply understand what’s going on for you and satisfy those needs in a more holistic way.
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Good video but hard to do when what I’m craving is loyalty and consistency. It’s why I crave both men and women because I’m not getting it from either.
Hey thanks for sharing. You mentioned you are craving loyalty and consistency. Try going a little deeper. Loyalty and consistency are what you want other people to do for you. If someone was loyal and consistent for you, how would you feel? That’s the need there. Then practise the technique I set out towards the end of the video. You can create it for yourself. You can. Sending all the very best.
This was a really interesting test. As a man who is going through divorce (wife of 10yrs’ choice to leave, but making life quite unpleasant in the process), I found my same-sex feelings ‘came back.’ I did get ‘excitement’ as a word but the main ones I got were ‘safe’, ‘content’, ‘secure’. Which makes a lot of sense, but I hadn’t made the connection.
Hey I’m so glad it resonated for you. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate it.
HAPPY PRIDE MONTH 🏳️🌈
I like tuning in because you always offer -food- a buffet for thought.
Ah thanks so much and for always giving such lovely comments. Happy Pride to you.
Pokhraj bhai aap yahan bhi?milkr acha lga wapis😂
@@swetamalya1012 Hi! Nice to see you too
Happy Pride, Mark!! 🏳🌈🏳⚧Thanks for the video!!
I think we love the idea of the person more than the person themselves. We are deserving of someone, including ourselves, who will fulfill our deepest desires and emotional needs. The heart wants what it wants. It's not that we are asking for the wrong things. Sometimes, we ask the wrong people or at the wrong times. Nonetheless, love is love. Our person will understand and accept this about us!!
Thank you. Happy pride to you too. 🩷🩷🩷
6:05 It’s like how a crush is not merely love but an idea of a certain person.
Even though I'm happily not in a relationship, there are a lot of of good points in this segment to ponder.
All I want and desire in a relationship is a sense of care and emotional connection, but my ex did not give me that. I found it in a man, which is worrying.
thank you and Happy Pride Month🏳🌈🏳🌈🏳🌈
And to you too my lovely 🩷
Thanks for the video! U r always choosing such interesting topics!
I find myself questioning the same again: Are bi urges any different from straight urges?
I feel they are indeed different, but I have a hard time trying to explain it to my friends and partners...
What if that urge is not sentimental at all? If it's only about certain body parts or acts that only a person with a different gender from your partner can provide? Is this a valid urge? Also finding that core need seems a bit hard to define in this context. Is fetishizing body parts from same gender a valid bisexual mark?
Good question. All attractions have an emotional charge behind them. There is no such thing as a purely physical attraction. You can always find the feeling behind the attraction even if it feels very physical.
Hmm. I've never felt bad about being like "I'd like a piece of that" male or female. It just reminds me I'm making an active choice to be with my boyfriend. It's not bad, which I think the guilt is really pushed, so you don't have to feel bad about feeling desire, just use it to reflect. Does my boyfriend have a soft kissable face? No, he's got a big beard, but I _like_ big beards. I try to enjoy what I enjoy about men in him, and enjoy the feminine in other ways.
That works for me though, I sympathize for those who are struggling. If I didn't figure out how to work with my quirks and do the things that are required of me, I imagine I would be extremely distressed.
Urges are rare for me
Hello.
Hello.
What advice you would give for someone who is obssesed about labels and how they must identify?
I just want to know how i have to.identify..
You don’t have to identify any particular way. It’s your choice what labels to use. If you are obsessed with it there is probably some fear behind it. Like how will people think of you. Try to get rid of the fear if you can. You choose. It’s your identity. No one can tell you how to identify but you. The buck stops with you. And you don’t have to have a label at all. It’s no one’s business.
Well the reason why i am obsses is because it seems that the sexuality label that we use its impotant and you have to be 100% sure(this is the thinking of the other people not mine)
To take my point:
Lets say that a person who is atraccted to both genders identiy as bisexual
Now the time pass.
And this person realises that is more more atracted to the same gender.
Its ok that this person identifies as gay now or should identify as bisexual?
I agree with you,i don't give have to be an explanation or justify anithing.
But as humans we care so much about thinks that probably don't concerns us.
I mind thats is MY OPINION.
What would be your advice?
If you could reply i would be helpfull
For me I've been bisexual since high school over 20 yrs ago and i married my wife bit when I told her I was bi she just straight face me and delt with it since and the type of men I'm into is the quiet silent type with a big heart and the party drag type like the characters ted and Emmitt from queer as folk now its hard to find that type with my age and I just feel numb
I’m separated from my wife but I love male Sex much Better
i what be both women and men but i have always love mens from day i was born to now what cause me to have crushs for women was storylines in tv soaps like eastenders and emmerdale coronation street and staff number in my old work who is lesbian cause me have fancy her then my mum was questioning me about it. i was getting so annoyed and upset because i didn't what come out to her and my dad in heaven so i can't really tell him that i like girls too and i love and fancy singer peter andre who sing mysterious girl so much and i got cursh on girl who i know from school but she got boyfriend and her dad knows my dad who died who 2011 from lung Abscess cause by his drinking and i got crush on girl from 90 day fiance call Erika Owens i am in problem and i got autism too so don't know what to do about it
Congratulations, you are pre-qualified for bisexual disaster card.
Hey thank you so much for sharing. I’m also autistic. It is extremely common for autistic people to have a range of attractions to different genders. You are among friends here and totally natural. You are doing just great and we are all here for you.
@@notdefiningwhat do I do then about my feelings men and women
@@notdefining Hi i have question for you over lgbt .Can i be bisexual but not fancy another gender just only men and women and Their need be flag for just fancying both boys and girls no else
Their 3 big problems
1 my mum isnt homophobic but she isn't fan of lesbians .
2 my dad in heaven no way i tell my mum she will ask me will i kiss a girl it will same as boy would it
3 i have austim.
@@notdefiningwhat do i do about my feelings for both men and women.
its people ...a person.... not parts ....for me