@@JenniferBrick here's my indeed review: Political take over of the company.. Sanitation Technician 35,000yr - Tennessee Like most liberal businesses if you dont fit the democrat ideology, you must be ommitted.( harassed til fired). Other than that everyone does their job..some very poorly but protected. HR was Awesome til they went on off day or vacation. Then the troubles begin.doxxing, 50 personal questions from employees you dont know.. radical minor managers to antagonize you into an attitude complaint. Micro management. Indeed:Review Not Posted😒
Best advice is to make your money and go home. Watch out if you are an overachiever. People forget work is not high school. Get the work done, be professional and keep it going.
Being a high achiever, I can confirm this is key. Best bit of advice is don`t achieve for the first 3 months. Just watch, figure out who the high achievers are and notice how they are treated. If its all clear then go for it, if not (and its usually not) you`re best falling into the average performance zone. Watching them includes the managers.
@@nishat_zamanYes. You’re rewarded with a large amount of extra work (while others aren’t) and you won’t be paid or recognized for it. And when you’ll get burned out and complain about it, the company will ignore it and may even fire you.
In my experience, most workplaces are very clickey, so if your coworkers don't like you and your bosses like the people who don't like you, it very much will effect every part of your job including your promotions and raises
@@nightfangs2910 if you aren’t in the “gang” you will not have opportunity. Opportunity will go to the “good ol boys” and those on the outter will either be left to stagnate or pushed out. I’ve seen and experienced it myself, It’s my own fault, I don’t know how to fake it…
Ain’t that the truth, they hired two girls and promoted them and they had less experience than I do and put less amount of time and work but they got promoted simply because they were able to break into the clique and become friends with management. Well I am still the same when I tried to talk to supervisor about it there was a rumor spread about me that I was some snitch and told on HR. Since then I’m dealing with this job working on finding an escape but since they already think so low of me I am in trench warfare right now just Saving face until I can find another job. I also know that I get treated a lot differently my messages are ignored not as liked etc. everyone’s Professional which is what’s expected of them but I think I’ve reached the end of my my time here in this current position
It's amazing how much gossip & meaness takes place in today's offices. Weak people deflect from their own problems by spreading gossip & hate against others. & others just as weak going along with it. Seen it so often & usually aimed at the quietest people in the office. Pitiful that so many adults have so little understanding of their own motives.
I’m telling you if your co workers don’t like you they will make your life miserable. They can be very clever passive aggressive and try to sabotage you and undermine you. Clearly you haven’t experienced work place bullying it can cause you to have a breakdown it’s so horrible.
When I first started working, I was so worried about getting other people's approval. Now that I'm getting older, I still care, but not as much as I used to. I'm at work to do the job. My coworkers are just doing their job. That's it.
My coworkers exclude me because I’m awkward and sometimes come off as cold. So many years in therapy and I haven’t been able to change myself to be more charismatic. I’m always excluded from lunches and after work social gatherings. I got invited out for drinks, once, by a woman my age. The other two attendees seemed disappointed to see me at the table. The woman who invited me gestured towards me under the table while saying to them, “oh just deal with it, I have a thing for the misunderstood”…. This was very off-putting. While I thought she’d be a good work-friend at first, I understood at that point that she looked down on me. Now I just keep my head down and accept that I won’t be accepted.
Stay strong and your not alone. Get out of toxic places I’m in the process of leaving it hurts it stings seeing them on social media enjoying each other’s company and so blatantly reject me. But I have to have hope alive in my heart
Never keep your head down. Don't accept anything, just be yourself and be proud of it. They'll learn who you are whether they like it or not. And some will respect you for being you with your head held high.
Stay away from women, don't expect anything from those chicks , they are never see you at a friend. They are cold fish, they could change their attitude 24/7 in a day.when you are understand female nature, you won't surprise anymore. Stay alerts just do the job and go home.
I know without a doubt that they didn't like me because I was continually harassed, bullied, sabotaged, betrayed, set up for failure, interrogated twice (last one for 6 hours) their intent was to make me look incompetent & because I was under so much distress & what I was working on those very people had access to, made it that much harder to perform without problems, it was done out of petty revenge, & to win favor with the other officers. I will not suck up to people just to have a job. I will find work that requires skills not personality to get ahead or ones that require minimal contact. No one should have to put up with this crap just to have a job & support themselves or their family. Done with the office political bs.
Please let us know how that has gone for you. Gainful self-employment has become my end goal. I'm just tired of dealing with dudes 2-3x my age acting like children. And no, it's not me, I've been asked/encouraged to move up from almost every job I've had and have been begged to stay from most as well.
I got fired because a coworker who didn’t like me spread rumors about me and made the whole team hate me..even turned a new supervisor against me..i was falsely accused of having a bad attitude and being a bad team player after being the most senior person on my shift there..i have trust issues at my new job now!
Many people dislike their jobs and pay level, and I believe because of that, they find qualities in co-workers to dislike. Me personally, I never cared. I always master my jobs and coast past the political shenanigans with a smile on my face.
I don’t go to work to make friends. I go for a paycheck. I am a contract rad tech so I am currently taking assignments. My last job I worked very closely with two girls. One was very nice. The other was ok. I got along with her enough . My contract I have now these girls are so catty. They talk about everyone behind their backs then nice in your face. I keep to myself . I say hi when I walk in door but don’t say anything to them unless it’s about work the entire day. No small talk. Supposedly one of them made a comment that I just stay in my own little bubble and scan. Which is true because I don’t want to talk to any of them. I have 9 more weeks. I don’t care what my review is either bc I don’t plan on ever coming back here again. I don’t really care if any of my coworkers like me anyways. I go there to work. Not hang out.
Sadly, office politics will negate a lot of this. If you are not liked by your boss, or your boss' friends, it affects everything: promotions, raises, and especially respect. Your work WILL suffer because they completely ignore your successes and magnify your mistakes. I'm living that hell right now, but need this job because of home life circumstances.
@@sheenalopez2312 Thank you for asking, Sheena. That is so kind! I actually ended up being moved to another department. I think my old boss thought he was getting rid of me, but it actually worked out great. My new team is so different. They are open, friendly, eager to share their knowledge and very intelligent, but without being smug jerks. Most of this team is working remotely from different states, so there is none of that "boy's club" feeling like I had before. There is a LOT for me to learn, because the products supported in this team are nothing I've used before, so I have a bit of a 'newbie' feel going, but they are allowing for that. So, God is good and came through for me once again. I hope it goes as well for everyone. Maybe it will give someone hope for things to improve for them, too. Thank you again for asking, and I hope all is well for you!!
@@WakkasLove so glad to hear things are much better for you now. Yes. Indeed, it gives hope for me and everyone else who has read your story. God can and will turn things around for those who put their faith in Him. Thank you for going out of your way to share this update. Blessings. 🙌
A Drill Sargent told us at Ft Benning I'm not here to be liked. Which is a true statement, your at work to do a job not be liked. However you should have a good working relationship with your co-workers.
@@JenniferBrick Exactly . All ways conduct in a professional manner towards your co-workers. I had a co worker tell me he didnt like me so he was not going to help me...I mentioned the above statement to him. 😄
Jennifer, I really wanted to agree with you on this one. But I was fired from a job in large part because I didn’t get along (allowed her to bully me and talk down to me) with the boss’s favorite. When the boss sensed friction between us, he told me that if you don’t get along with her, you can leave like _____ did (another person who couldn’t deal with her). She wasn’t a manager. She wasn’t my supervisor or a boss. But her word had more weight than anyone else’s. And the funny thing is we had bonded over past work traumas that we had in common. [Coworkers are not your friends - I know now.] She became the same monster she told me she had to deal with in the past. She knew that the boss would side with her no matter what, and her actions showed it. So sometimes, whether or not your coworkers like you (and what they tell the boss) does matter. It was her word that got me booted out the door. It really shouldn’t matter. It just does sometimes. But still, no thumbs down from me. Your content is amazing! 😁
What you described though, she was don someone who has been given power over your career by your boss - in that case likability does matter. Next video is digging into the power and politics and I think it's gonna give you some insights (though I hope you NEVER have to deal with that BS again)
@@JenniferBrick YOU HAVE NO IDEA of Office Bullying and the hell it can put you through. I been through it and when many co workers hate you then can set you up to fail , report you to management and make your life hell until you quit I find your video useless
Exactly! Women get mad at me (at the jobs I've had) because some man or men that they like likes me and helps me out. I am an introvert, quiet, stick to myself, and do my job. I'm not there to make friends. I'm there for a check.
Being liked doesn't do anything for me. If you do,that's fine. If you don't, oh well. As long as my money is right, I don't indulge that schoolyard mentality.
Clearly the lady doing the video has no experience of this Co workers can make your life hell until you quit. They can bully you in very clever ways , cut communication, make you feel isolated and stressed. Is that really how you want to live your life every day? Don’t ignore bullying and say it does not affect you Co workers can also tell the manager lots of negative things about you and get you in trouble too
In the military and in law enforcement, not being liked by your peers often equates to doing a better job than they do. Fragging is a real danger, just as the movie "Platoon" portrayed. In civilian work life, sniping takes place verbally and is not as harmful. Often it's a backhanded compliment to be disliked by some people, the mediocre ones.
I've seen this in many stratified types of organizations as well, especially government workers. If you excel you can risk the wrath of coworkers and even your bosses!
People at work don't matter! If you can make friends fine but don't expect to. You are forced to be around a group of people that you do not choose to be around unlike real life where you choose your friends work put you in a setting where this will fail every time. Not everybody will take to you as you will not take to everybody else
There is a huge clique at my work. I am the odd man out. No one laughs at my jokes or goes out of their way to talk to me to see how I'm doing. I go out my way to talk to them about their lives their kids and to be personable. It does nothing to change it. While all the other ones are talking to each other laughing joking they're laughing joking and talking to one another about their lives.. There's a girl I can do circles around at work. I bust my butt just to see if I can get any kind of recognition but none from my peers. Instead they don't on the ones who don't do nearly as much. And when I do thank people for helping me, they don't seem to appreciate that at all either. I truly don't feel like I have one single person there that appreciates me. The bosses seem to like but they seem to be friends and invite the one girl that everyone loves over to their house. There is one girl that I sometimes work with and I help her because I'm assigned to her. I do more work than what I should for her and I could do 1 thing wrong and she is absolutely mean a nasty. It's gotten worse since she believes that she will be accepted in the nursing school. She proceeded to tell a trainee in front of me today that another girl who I could do circles around was really good about jumping in and helping. Even though I do more work than this girl and probably do more work for this ungrateful he then than what she deserves What should I do, because at this point I hate my job so much I want to quit.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m going through a very similar situation. Just keep doing your best and focus on your work. I hope it gets better
If you're being left out of team emails that can have you looking unprepared and unprofessional I n front of higher managers. It can get to be a big deal that way.
What about coworkers who don't like you who are able to get your boss's ear and go out of their way to sabotage you or make you look bad (and for whatever reason, the boss takes their word at higher value than yours)? I am a RN and have experienced personally and witnessed it happen to others. There's a saying in nursing school, "nurses eat their young" but as a seasoned RN with nearly 15 years experience the saying should be, "nurses eat each other". I've been in so many toxic work environments that I honestly feel that I want to change careers, not bc of what I do but bc of the catty and mean behaviors of the predominantly female workforce. In every position or department I've worked in I've experienced or seen coworkers get people put on performance improvement plans, get pushed out that they quit, even be fired. Like you said in previous videos, "HR is not your friend", you're 100% correct. What advice do you have for these types of situations? (*it's really sad that many women continue to behave like high school girls. I don't know if it's a power thing, they're jealous or threatened by their "target", just mean...)
Which is ironic coming from a profession where everyone seems to recognize before they recognize medical assistant surgeons or even doctors. I truly believe and I mean no disrespect comment my dad is in RN so I do have love for them, but some of them I have to wonder if they're not in it for the money but disguised themselves with a mask of compassion
I wish I could accept this, but when decision makers/important people are close with coworkers (that dislike you), feel it can almost always make it tricky to manuever.
It's a different ball game when the establishment is institutionally Narcissistic and encourages toxic behaviour. Its imperative to educate oneself of on the complexities of dark personalities and protect yourself from emotional vampires 🧛♂️
Great advice and well said. I survived and was untouchable in a environment like that.I knew how to counter the attacks,prevent them and exude such love,light and positive professionalism it just left them frustrated and me beaming with victory in not folding to the foolishness.
@@hibiscushoney3759 this is remarkable. I am under attack right now.... I am the only light in a cess pit of really dark soul less creatures who relentlessly manufacture unprovoked attacks... I have been doing what you just described and its tough but finally yesterday this narcissistic woman had a melt down and exposed herself. All because I was being kind, smiling, offering to work during my holiday time as she refused to order items she requires herself.. basically she is cutting the branch she is sitting on... she has been smear campaigning me wanting me to be fired. I have been terminated but need to hand over my duties before I leave. I have to take my holidays else I lose them. She now refuses to learn my task so I can leave a functional Laboratory.... its crazy making
@@AKUBARIKI Those that hate your shine is because your light blinds them. Stay positive,stay focused and keep smiling. They are miserable and afflicted because they cannot bring you down with their toxic antics. Don't match their low dark energy. You belong in a better place that can match and enhance your vibe. Not try to dim your brightness.Good luck and be glad you are released from that pit of despair. Much light n love to you❣
A coworker always rolls her eyes at me, and always looks like she hates my guts. Whenever I say something funny she shouts that my humour sucks, and then says something less funny that her group finds funny. She always favours the young pretty people in their 20s and she is above 60. She goes out of her way to treat everyone else way nicer than me.
No thumbs down from me. I agree - it legit doesn't matter. I think it's important what you think of yourself first and then the people that are like you said making decisions about you etc. Great video as per usual Jennifer!
Happy Tuesday Jennifer 😃 - I would rather my co workers respect & emulate me then " like " me. I hope they , like me are satisfied with accomplishing our daily projects & knowing I am dependable & a straight shooter.
Most people don't like me. In fact I find trying to be liked drains yhr energy out of me and it almost always ends in people not liking me. I also have ADHD so I think part of it is unconscious discrimination because of how I work is not how a lot of people work. I had to learn differently than most people. I am also a nurse, and many nurotypical nurses are very judgemental.
Very much relate to this. I’m a lawyer with adhd. My working ways are also different from those around me and I feel because of this I was never destined to be liked in work places. It’s more about doing the work getting paid and going home
Hi Jennifer, I really appreciate your content! I have been watching your videos due to struggling lately with this fairly new job I have. It’s almost been 3 months working here (probationary period is almost over!!!) and I am finding it harder and harder to find reasons to hold onto this job. I really like my boss, which is always a plus. She is such a sweet person from pretty much all of the interactions I have had with her, but in terms of a few of my co workers, well, let’s just say we are not on the best of terms as of right now and things are awkward. Basically, I voiced some of my offenses to them and they did not take it well and instead of talking with me directly, things just didn’t get resolved directly. One of my co workers who used to sit right next to me moved while I was on sick leave. Another one of my co workers just annoys me, but I don’t really talk to him any longer after he did something offensive. I just want to feel happy here like I used to before all this nonsense. I think the biggest mistake I made is becoming way too friendly with some co workers who I sit near. I would have loved to have seen your videos BEFORE I had made any mistakes, but they are learning lessons and I am trying not to dwell. Good news, most of the “higher ups” like me/are nice to me, and like I said, my boss and I are on good terms. It’s just this toxicity with some of my direct co workers I can no longer stand.
My coworkers complained to the employer about me, making up lies and saying they feel intimidated by me. My employer decides to give me a disaplinary, I said I done nothing wrong.... disaplinary for what??! I done nothing wrong. Employer says to me.... if I hear anymore your in trouble. Its totally illogical....... when I see my coworkers they all seem friendly. So what the hell is the employer complaining about. I just had to leave the job. Im easy going very friendly & considerate.
Nothing works on my "Mean Girl", I have tried uplifting and asking for help with something she claims to be good at and nothing. Only upside is that I know it's out of jealousy. Six and a half months after I started I was given a promotion, but after 10 months she had to ask for a promotion. We had conflict months ago; she and another co-worker were talking about trying to get me fired, I saw it and reacted right away. I walked into my supervisor's office, told her what was going on and that I was done for the day. I proceeded to walk past the boss and straight out to my car and headed home. Boss called to say that she was going to look into it herself and that she hoped I would come back. Two weeks later, I got a raise for taking the high road and for having to deal with her crap. I know no one loves a tattle-tale but I moved to a new city and no one was going to fuck with my career, if it ends it's going to be because of something I do, not them. It's been a while of me putting up with their shit and if I burst, it's not going to be pretty; feelings will be hurt.
I don’t give two shits about these people not liking me, I need them to HELP ME WHEN IM FORCED TO TRAIN UNDER THEM. They can’t act normal in a professional manner and separate emotions from work. Even if I don’t like someone, I still assist them at work because sabotaging someone at work doesn’t benefit me at all and has a higher probability of backfiring on me. I believe in karma.
I would agree with you in my previous company. I could work independently most of the time, and answered to my direct superiors, but my current employer throws their employees to the wolves and pretty much forces a lot of team interaction. If you are an admin that team interaction means they give you endless and non/ stop tasks. They throw everyone your way because they think it’s your job to handle everything that nobody else wants to do. That is the culture and it’s why I need to leave.
What if the coworker doesn't like you through feeling professionally threatened or envious, and at every opportunity complains that you aren't doing your job properly to management. While the information isn't accurate, it does seem like it influences managements perception of you. I don't like to complain, since I think it is unprofessional and it seems petty, but then I find they only get one side of the story and it negatively affects my chances of promotion. What can I do about this? It's so difficult to ignore when someone has begun a campaign to ruin your reputation, when all I want to do is get on with my work.
Speak with HR or talk to your supervisors directly. Personally, I prefer bringing issues up with HR first because they can be more neutral than superiors who might have favorites or their own agenda. Anyway, you have a voice too. I remember I had a coworker falsely accuse me of something like harassment (when in reality he’s been harassing me). I didn’t do that at all and a new supervisor didn’t ask me my side of the story until I complained that I’m being punished or even looked down on for something I didn’t do. I was ready to escalate this issue to HR. Instead, I shared my story to the supervisor. The new supervisor then asked our mutual coworkers more info and spent more time in our department to realize the true nature of this employee who coincidentally requested to quit 2 weeks later from the day I defended myself. I say do your work well and speak up. I’m so glad that guy was an idiot. He tried to ruin my reputation and it seemed like my character and being there 2+ years did not matter to faceless management. What mattered is I spoke for myself and he was actually a really bad employee. I had a good reputation with my coworkers - I’m sure that helped too! I’m also thinking I should have reported to HR how my supervisors mishandled the situation TBH.
0:26 they don’t. They whisper and disperse when I am around. I get comments that make me feel they don’t think I am dumb. I am about to quit and never go out again.
In the scientific field, especially labs, it gets surprisingly impactful on your ability to grow/ certain things I think that’s why so many are a little awkward and quiet. It’s nice to bump into friendly ones, though
I just finished a seasonal job as middle management and was sure all of my subordinates disliked me. I was Ms. Nice Guy all season long but had to become the heavy toward the end because no one else would step up and enforce company rules. Surprisingly, I still got thank you's from a few of them. Maybe they were just blowing smoke but there you go 🤷
As long as you are lower than them and they are better (position, salary, favourism) they will like you, the moment you get better than them they will hate you no matter what...
The best place I worked in we had some co-workers who didn't like each other, mainly personality conflicts, but we could all trust each other to do our jobs & help each other despite differences. No one was lazy & everyone pulled together. And we all commiserated about our crazy boss, lol. But trust made all the difference in the world. We didn't have to like each other to work well together.
I dont like none of my coworkers. Im a highly spiritual intuitive person and im keen on subtle things. Body language, good or bad vibes, eye language etc... The lord gives it to me naturally. I can sense a snake trust me 💯. Another thing my stomach start flipping, i get a throw up feeling inside me.
I just ran across your videos and thank God i did! i was feeling like a group of childish coworkers were throwing shade but I had to remember I really dont care lol
My boss likes me but some of my coworkers don't like me. Its toxic and at my last job it felt more like family. People knew me and they knew my sister. I actually fitted in. I dont like this new job nor the energy of this job. I plan on transferring to another department after I complete my 6 month probation period.
Ms. Brick. Keep up the good work. I would be more aware of the Patty's you described. It truly amazing when you see the people you described in action. Two thumbs up.
We'll be calling back to the five villains often around here. If you haven't already watched the 3 types of difficult coworkers video I uploaded last week I highly recommend it!!
I appreciate you saying it does not matter. I made a bad first impression. When i started there. I was emotional i tried to be their friends and well. Apparently, according to a good friend, they may not like that im coming back to work. :(. Ive been off for a year. I thought they were. One of my coworkers said everyones positive about it. Now im feeling like they are dreading my return. My boss hates me. I lacked confidence. Happy i see that now and i hope i can change their opinion of me. They see me and the whinney girl who shares to much and always asks for help. Its not that i dont know. Im just a pushover and i feel like i need someone to back up what im saying. Not gonna do that no more. I know what i am doing and talking about....
I think you're right and I think you're wrong. People spend more hours at work than they do with their families. We're pack animals. We strive to be part of a group. Not being liked at work, of being excluded and isolated is akin to being on the outs in a community. Most people work because they need the money, but people consistently across the board say the most important things they get from work have nothing to do with money. You can be disliked--which even if people are professional but distant takes a toll--and function but it would be a miserable existence. You don't need to be best friends, but you need allies, you need people who will take your back when needed. People that you can trust and do the same for--work as a team. Being in an environment where you are always on guard, protecting yourself, alone. No. I think it matters.
I agree with you. I would not like to spend 40+ hours per week around people who dislike me. As humans we can feel unpleasant energy from others. Even if someone is outwardly professional and polite, we can still feel it and it ain't good. Being around people who exude negative energy towards us consistently affects our mental health.
@Tracy Jewels I don't know. Sometimes if you are disliked simply for work performance, you can improve that and their attitude will change. Occasionally, there could also be misunderstandings that can later be corrected. At a previous job, a manager became enraged after a customer complained about me. Later, I became one of the restaurant's favorite and highest-performing employees. Now they absolutely love me, whereas previously, I believe that they despised me. So yes, under some circumstances, you might be able to correct others' attitudes towards you, but we also can't forget that sometimes people will dislike you for no valid reason. If you have verified that your coworkers and boss hate you due to envy or some personal bias related to something like your race or sexual orientation, you might as well just make a plan to leave that job and find a work environment where the people are less toxic and hostile.
I just found out that my coworkers gossip badly about me, but everyone smile at me, going forward I will just be professional with no desire to social activities on the office, but like Jen said, it doesn't matter but there is a but, if you're a junior and your seniors hate you it is difficult as they won't be available to teach you relevant staff, that's my case... however I've found a solution since I have good relationship with the management (got promoted this year in just 6 months of joining) of being a top performer (reason the team hates me lol) so its fine for me, at the end of the day only outputs matter, the social part of your coworkers not much.
In my experience, it is often (usually) an overarching influence by an illegal group that is picking on (targeting) someone. The harboured goal (resentment is not a goal) is almost always criminal, or worse. I take hate that is allowed in a workplace very, very seriously as I look for something else. Now, after decades of it, ppl are starting to pick on "looking (for)"...brackets (parentheses) notwithstanding.
What if the co-worker who does not like you always invite your staff members out for lunch. So could that co-worker inject her dislike of you into the team members.
I was born in Seattle in 1973, where I grew up. Japanese-American. Male. I have at least two stories on this topic. Maybe, this proves that geography DOES come into play: Years ago, a then 40s woman named Patty, from Kentucky, was hired to be a supervisor. Heavy Kentucky accent (not that I had a problem with it). I admit, the women at my office are VERY guarded and standoffish, and I just accepted that, and "leave them alone." Well, Patty lasted literally less than a month, before resigning. She said, "They don't like me." On the other hand, I worked with a VERY loud and obnoxious Italian-American young woman named Susan, who preferred to roam around and socialize with colleagues, even for 30 minutes (before our office cracked down on productivity). In a nutshell, I knew that Susan didn't care for me, because I just worked hard (I NEVER glared at Susan when she socialized, and I sure the heck never tattled on her), and didn't get into talking about her personal life. I don't care for certain peoples' "verbal autobiography" that they seem to like to share, every time they come into the office. If I'm not liked by them, then heck with them!
What if your coworkers don’t like you because you’ve been toxic for years (bringing marital problems into the workplace) and you’ve been on a healing journey, left the toxic marriage, and you’re trying to be better but everyone still looks at you with distrust and like they’re waiting for the next outburst? It may not matter for your career advancement if your coworkers don’t like you, but it does matter for your mental health. Oh, and management hates me most of all. They’ve been holding a grudge against me for years.
My situation is that I have to be in the same office space as someone that works in another group. While I don't work directly with him for the most part, there might be some times collaboration is required between both our groups. I was at my job for years before this person started. One time not long after he started I needed some help from his group so I went to ask him. Guy wouldn't even look at me from the computer screen. He also goes out of his way to avoid me, for example if he's walking back to his desk and he sees me walking towards him, he'll quickly change directions and go another way. Things like that. After a while of that sort of constant disrespect, I dislike him as much as he may dislike me. I'm just praying he either gets fired or finds another job.
@@JenniferBrick I have a true story where a colleague blind copied our team so she could leave me off of informative emails. I was new to the company. This was her way of intentionally sharing important information without anyone noticing I was missing from the email. Eventually people caught on, but it takes others speaking up to rectify that situation and I was always walking around uninformed. Very toxic.
I know someone who was really disliked by a secretary. The secretary had been at the company years and the disliked girl was new. Made things horrible for her. It does happen. Soon as she was ‘let go’ the secretary started on me. I could only tolerate it because I was only there on a contract.
Too much work and everyone is my current workplace are super busy and being a new hire I have so many questions. But I am afraid to ask as they won’t really help me
I started a job with another lady. From day 1 she was off , abrupt and cut me out. Then another girl joined from another branch and that lady became close friends and both against me. Now they both bully me every day , rude and boss me around. It makes me feel humiliated and very sad and stressed. I have done nothing to them and it affects my health The co workers are good friends with the manager and they are feeding the manager negative information about me so I Totally disagree with you the co workers ruin my health and it’s likely as they are on good terms with manager I am screwed
It's true. It's tough as an extrovert trying to be friendly. You're pretty much the only one doing it and you're always the only one laughing when something is funny. You're the odd one out. One day, i gave up and made my job my job, and my home my home.
I have never been like by any of the co workers at different jobs. I talk to them ask them questions it's like some how I offended but did not.? At any job I had never felt welcome at all.
Hi I really enjoy your videos. I really relate to this. I think they dont like me. They are nice but they dont like talking to me but they talk to each other. So I started ignoring them. I dont know how to navigate or get through this. They dont really ask me for help unless really necessary. Other than saying hi and bye I stopped talking to them. I dont really need to work much with them because we are responsible for different channels anyways. I am so happy you think it does not matter what they think. 😅
I’m financially free but I still have to work in a job, cause is family business and coworkers always fight…is so difficult to get out. I cannot quit my boss says
It does happen, if your face fits, then fine. If it doesn't, God help us! Not every workplace is the same. I've come across this this once or twice. Clickey colleagues have always been around,
I know you say it doesn't matter but it really does if the person is your Manager and can have control over you being promoted. I think many years my boss did not like me and his decisions impacted me. He kept me from Higher ups and everything.
I think you missed the part where I said it's important for people who make decisions about your pay, promotions and performance reviews. Rhode decision makers and influencers are crucial and being in their good side is non negotiable.
@@JenniferBrick I saw that and I agree with it. I was just emphazing my point because say they are the coworkers and your boss like them and prefers them over you. It also can impact you too if those coworkers do not like you. Your boss could be friends with the coworkers who do not like you. I saw it happen at my job.
Do you have any videos in the makings that deal with disabled workers. People with autism etc. I had to quit a temp job due to management being anti disabled. The recruitment agency is raising this further up the chain. I’m in the UK btw and we have a disability bill from 2010 that makes this illegal.
@ajoyforlife1 nailed it: watch out if you are an overachiever: coworker envy is real and you will likely get attacked by your peers and managers. Yes, depending on how dysfunctional and political the environment is you work in, coworkers liking you can matter.
It is actually on one job performance review, in writing, "stop being a perfectionist and reach 100% performance, practice reaching the engineering 80% of solution. " I get along with peers, it was just those peers aiming for promotion. 🙄
What do you do, if you’re coworker is only willing to help because they’ll get something in return from you? For example, I had training questions/needed assistance with my task and my coworker said you owe me. So I bought said person a Cola. But now I don’t even want to ask for help..
Favors are currency, your coworker is taking that literally. You shouldn't have to buy a coworker something if they answer a training question. All someone else if you can, they can limit themselves all the want
Depends on so many factors, but in our work setting it worked out best when we cut them short, and told the person that we are here to work, not for favours. For instance, we had people who came in to do an extra shift when someone was off sick and they went on how they "came in to help". No, mate, you don't come to "help", it was your choice to come in, now you are here to do your job. You don't "owe them" anything, it's not a prison culture, they get paid a salary to do their job. Then there's another thing. I also learnt very early in a previous work setting that when you "help" somebody if they are behind with their work, the next time they'll just assume it's your job to do the same thing again. (Yep, they were behind because they were slow and lazy to start off with.)
What if's affects your mental health and effectiveness in the workplace? I don't want everyone to like me. I have a very specific circle of people that I'm friends with...but when 5 people are nonstop against me and always have a problem with me it's really messing me up.
Both jobs asked me who I voted for...all went down hill after that. 1st. 2 jobs lasted 2years of hell one job 3 years of hell last job 8 months of hell..now done. and I got pictures🤔
@@JenniferBrick good luck with that, they hound you with different people with the same questions till you give..then they run in a corner snd start poking in their phones as a group..😒
Jennifer, Have a quick question. Love your channel. Work at a major retailer and I'm on the DM promotion list. I have a new boss since January and he is never around. He falsified visits and has lost 6 out of 13 manager's. I. Have heard the reason I have not been promoted is him. Very reliable source. I gave notice and no one seems to care. Should I say something before I go or just move on. My numbers all good just a FYI. Need advice.
As long as my “career bestie” likes me, I don’t care about the others ❤️❤️❤️
Glad you're hanging with me today friend!
@@JenniferBrick here's my indeed review: Political take over of the company..
Sanitation Technician 35,000yr - Tennessee
Like most liberal businesses if you dont fit the democrat ideology, you must be ommitted.( harassed til fired). Other than that everyone does their job..some very poorly but protected. HR was Awesome til they went on off day or vacation. Then the troubles begin.doxxing, 50 personal questions from employees you dont know.. radical minor managers to antagonize you into an attitude complaint. Micro management. Indeed:Review Not Posted😒
Wow sounds like they have ZERO work life boundaries - or professionalism.
@@JenniferBrick ..I think its just better if I start my own business before I end up on a walker..I've already put in 39 years in the workforce..👍🏾👍🏾😊
Its Ghetto Mob-Rule in Tn.
Best advice is to make your money and go home. Watch out if you are an overachiever. People forget work is not high school. Get the work done, be professional and keep it going.
Being a high achiever, I can confirm this is key. Best bit of advice is don`t achieve for the first 3 months. Just watch, figure out who the high achievers are and notice how they are treated. If its all clear then go for it, if not (and its usually not) you`re best falling into the average performance zone.
Watching them includes the managers.
THIS!!
What is wrong with being an overachiever? I know you can attract jealousy but are there any other reasons?
@@nishat_zamanYes. You’re rewarded with a large amount of extra work (while others aren’t) and you won’t be paid or recognized for it. And when you’ll get burned out and complain about it, the company will ignore it and may even fire you.
If you want to work 9/5 you’ll have to baaah with the sheep. Working for yourself is for those who are overachievers.
In my experience, most workplaces are very clickey, so if your coworkers don't like you and your bosses like the people who don't like you, it very much will effect every part of your job including your promotions and raises
Jobs for the boys..
@@aulzhoefer explain yourself ?
@@nightfangs2910 if you aren’t in the “gang” you will not have opportunity. Opportunity will go to the “good ol boys” and those on the outter will either be left to stagnate or pushed out. I’ve seen and experienced it myself, It’s my own fault, I don’t know how to fake it…
Ain’t that the truth, they hired two girls and promoted them and they had less experience than I do and put less amount of time and work but they got promoted simply because they were able to break into the clique and become friends with management. Well I am still the same when I tried to talk to supervisor about it there was a rumor spread about me that I was some snitch and told on HR. Since then I’m dealing with this job working on finding an escape but since they already think so low of me I am in trench warfare right now just Saving face until I can find another job. I also know that I get treated a lot differently my messages are ignored not as liked etc. everyone’s Professional which is what’s expected of them but I think I’ve reached the end of my my time here in this current position
You are 100 percent right they make your life hell until you quit
i don't want or need to be liked. i need to be trusted to do my work. and talk to me with respect
Yes!
Same, I only need to be trusted to do my job! I don’t need you to like me!
And what if it doesn’t happen, any advice on how you personally deal with that?
@soullooker start looking for another job asap. By default, You should always be looking but speed up the search when you are in need of a job.
@@asadb1990 but its literally everywhere. Like i want to learn how to communicate with all personalities instead of keep getting a new job.
It's amazing how much gossip & meaness takes place in today's offices. Weak people deflect from their own problems by spreading gossip & hate against others. & others just as weak going along with it. Seen it so often & usually aimed at the quietest people in the office. Pitiful that so many adults have so little understanding of their own motives.
Problem is the most shallow gossips are the first to cuddle up to the supervisors & the supervisors are rarely smart enough to see through it.
@@lydiadavis7810 *supervisors are too ego driven
As a people pleaser person with OCD, office politics can feel like hell sometimes, even a weird look from someone can make you feel they hate you.
I feel you on that or if no one likes or comments on something your trying to share like a joke etc
Holy shit I have OCD as well
Omg I totally know what you mean!
Yes, that's me
Omg yes I feel this
No your co workers do not need to like you, they need to work with you. The job needs to get done, in a functioning productive manner.
I’m telling you if your co workers don’t like you they will make your life miserable. They can be very clever passive aggressive and try to sabotage you and undermine you.
Clearly you haven’t experienced work place bullying it can cause you to have a breakdown it’s so horrible.
When I first started working, I was so worried about getting other people's approval. Now that I'm getting older, I still care, but not as much as I used to. I'm at work to do the job. My coworkers are just doing their job. That's it.
My coworkers exclude me because I’m awkward and sometimes come off as cold. So many years in therapy and I haven’t been able to change myself to be more charismatic.
I’m always excluded from lunches and after work social gatherings.
I got invited out for drinks, once, by a woman my age. The other two attendees seemed disappointed to see me at the table. The woman who invited me gestured towards me under the table while saying to them, “oh just deal with it, I have a thing for the misunderstood”…. This was very off-putting. While I thought she’d be a good work-friend at first, I understood at that point that she looked down on me. Now I just keep my head down and accept that I won’t be accepted.
Stay strong and your not alone. Get out of toxic places I’m in the process of leaving it hurts it stings seeing them on social media enjoying each other’s company and so blatantly reject me. But I have to have hope alive in my heart
Never keep your head down. Don't accept anything, just be yourself and be proud of it. They'll learn who you are whether they like it or not. And some will respect you for being you with your head held high.
I would prefer to work with you. Keep your head up….work is not your life….it’s just a means to an end.
That sounds horrible. I'm sorry ❤
Stay away from women, don't expect anything from those chicks , they are never see you at a friend. They are cold fish, they could change their attitude 24/7 in a day.when you are understand female nature, you won't surprise anymore. Stay alerts just do the job and go home.
I do not care if coworkers like me or not, but when they sabotage my job is different...
Agree!
I know without a doubt that they didn't like me because I was continually harassed, bullied, sabotaged, betrayed, set up for failure, interrogated twice (last one for 6 hours) their intent was to make me look incompetent & because I was under so much distress & what I was working on those very people had access to, made it that much harder to perform without problems, it was done out of petty revenge, & to win favor with the other officers. I will not suck up to people just to have a job. I will find work that requires skills not personality to get ahead or ones that require minimal contact. No one should have to put up with this crap just to have a job & support themselves or their family. Done with the office political bs.
This is my situation as well. Thinking of becoming a contractor in future, paid to do the work and left alone.
Please let us know how that has gone for you. Gainful self-employment has become my end goal. I'm just tired of dealing with dudes 2-3x my age acting like children.
And no, it's not me, I've been asked/encouraged to move up from almost every job I've had and have been begged to stay from most as well.
this happened to me too. My boss is sabotaging me for no good reason.
I got fired because a coworker who didn’t like me spread rumors about me and made the whole team hate me..even turned a new supervisor against me..i was falsely accused of having a bad attitude and being a bad team player after being the most senior person on my shift there..i have trust issues at my new job now!
That’s definitely a real problem. It does happen and is a real thing. You can find a place where that doesn’t happen.
It's not a big deal if my co-workers don't like me because 99% I'm not gonna like them back.
Many people dislike their jobs and pay level, and I believe because of that, they find qualities in co-workers to dislike. Me personally, I never cared. I always master my jobs and coast past the political shenanigans with a smile on my face.
Lol
Well, some people will never grow up and act like total brats. Period.
More #SadFacts :(
Yea, I don't like them because I picked up the vibe from their toxic personalities
I don’t go to work to make friends. I go for a paycheck. I am a contract rad tech so I am currently taking assignments. My last job I worked very closely with two girls. One was very nice. The other was ok. I got along with her enough . My contract I have now these girls are so catty. They talk about everyone behind their backs then nice in your face. I keep to myself . I say hi when I walk in door but don’t say anything to them unless it’s about work the entire day. No small talk. Supposedly one of them made a comment that I just stay in my own little bubble and scan. Which is true because I don’t want to talk to any of them. I have 9 more weeks. I don’t care what my review is either bc I don’t plan on ever coming back here again. I don’t really care if any of my coworkers like me anyways. I go there to work. Not hang out.
I'm I'm this exact position now as a contract resp therapist
Sadly, office politics will negate a lot of this. If you are not liked by your boss, or your boss' friends, it affects everything: promotions, raises, and especially respect. Your work WILL suffer because they completely ignore your successes and magnify your mistakes. I'm living that hell right now, but need this job because of home life circumstances.
I feel you. How is it going for you now?
@@sheenalopez2312 Thank you for asking, Sheena. That is so kind! I actually ended up being moved to another department. I think my old boss thought he was getting rid of me, but it actually worked out great. My new team is so different. They are open, friendly, eager to share their knowledge and very intelligent, but without being smug jerks. Most of this team is working remotely from different states, so there is none of that "boy's club" feeling like I had before. There is a LOT for me to learn, because the products supported in this team are nothing I've used before, so I have a bit of a 'newbie' feel going, but they are allowing for that. So, God is good and came through for me once again. I hope it goes as well for everyone. Maybe it will give someone hope for things to improve for them, too. Thank you again for asking, and I hope all is well for you!!
@@WakkasLove so glad to hear things are much better for you now. Yes. Indeed, it gives hope for me and everyone else who has read your story. God can and will turn things around for those who put their faith in Him. Thank you for going out of your way to share this update. Blessings. 🙌
@@sheenalopez2312 Blessings right back to you, Sheena. You're a sweetheart, and it's been a pleasure conversing with you. :)
That happened today at work my mistakes got magnified, but when I completed 20 projects in a row without fail not even a congratulations.
So true! I spent so much time trying to fit in and then I just gave up and nothing bad happened 🤷 and I actually got some benefits at work.
EXACTLY THIS!! All that effort can be redirected to making a big impact, right!?
A Drill Sargent told us at Ft Benning I'm not here to be liked. Which is a true statement, your at work to do a job not be liked. However you should have a good working relationship with your co-workers.
I totally agree. Being liked is distinct from having productive working relationships. So important we pull those two apart!
@@JenniferBrick Exactly . All ways conduct in a professional manner towards your co-workers. I had a co worker tell me he didnt like me so he was not going to help me...I mentioned the above statement to him. 😄
Jennifer, I really wanted to agree with you on this one. But I was fired from a job in large part because I didn’t get along (allowed her to bully me and talk down to me) with the boss’s favorite. When the boss sensed friction between us, he told me that if you don’t get along with her, you can leave like _____ did (another person who couldn’t deal with her). She wasn’t a manager. She wasn’t my supervisor or a boss. But her word had more weight than anyone else’s. And the funny thing is we had bonded over past work traumas that we had in common. [Coworkers are not your friends - I know now.] She became the same monster she told me she had to deal with in the past. She knew that the boss would side with her no matter what, and her actions showed it. So sometimes, whether or not your coworkers like you (and what they tell the boss) does matter. It was her word that got me booted out the door. It really shouldn’t matter. It just does sometimes. But still, no thumbs down from me. Your content is amazing! 😁
What you described though, she was don someone who has been given power over your career by your boss - in that case likability does matter.
Next video is digging into the power and politics and I think it's gonna give you some insights (though I hope you NEVER have to deal with that BS again)
Im so sorry that happened to you and hope that you find peace, happiness, and a job worthy of your time soon.
I´ve been in a similar situation, I´m trying to deal with it by showing my boss I am highly skilled and able to handle things in a better way.
@@JenniferBrick YOU HAVE NO IDEA of Office Bullying and the hell it can put you through. I been through it and when many co workers hate you then can set you up to fail , report you to management and make your life hell until you quit
I find your video useless
@@JenniferBrickyou can make someone like you no matter how many tips you throw out there or videos you make. Some people are just evil or rude
Who cares about those jealous people. 😂😂😂
#Facts
Exactly! Women get mad at me (at the jobs I've had) because some man or men that they like likes me and helps me out. I am an introvert, quiet, stick to myself, and do my job. I'm not there to make friends. I'm there for a check.
👆💥💯💯💥👆👆🙌
Great advice! I’ve found the coworkers who don’t like me are usually jealous of something. I’m currently working with a coworker like that.
Being liked doesn't do anything for me. If you do,that's fine. If you don't, oh well. As long as my money is right, I don't indulge that schoolyard mentality.
One of the benefits or remote work , could care less if co-worker dislikes me.
Clearly the lady doing the video has no experience of this
Co workers can make your life hell until you quit. They can bully you in very clever ways , cut communication, make you feel isolated and stressed. Is that really how you want to live your life every day?
Don’t ignore bullying and say it does not affect you
Co workers can also tell the manager lots of negative things about you and get you in trouble too
Exactly !!!
In the military and in law enforcement, not being liked by your peers often equates to doing a better job than they do. Fragging is a real danger, just as the movie "Platoon" portrayed. In civilian work life, sniping takes place verbally and is not as harmful. Often it's a backhanded compliment to be disliked by some people, the mediocre ones.
Definitely oriented to the office folks where there is lower risk.
I've seen this in many stratified types of organizations as well, especially government workers. If you excel you can risk the wrath of coworkers and even your bosses!
Yeah but in law enforcement it's all about image & if they think you will make them look bad they will go after you. I speak from experience.
I come from a military family in all branches and Police..guess I'm a target for Thug elements and Jerks and Junkies..
People at work don't matter! If you can make friends fine but don't expect to. You are forced to be around a group of people that you do not choose to be around unlike real life where you choose your friends work put you in a setting where this will fail every time. Not everybody will take to you as you will not take to everybody else
There is a huge clique at my work. I am the odd man out. No one laughs at my jokes or goes out of their way to talk to me to see how I'm doing. I go out my way to talk to them about their lives their kids and to be personable. It does nothing to change it. While all the other ones are talking to each other laughing joking they're laughing joking and talking to one another about their lives.. There's a girl I can do circles around at work. I bust my butt just to see if I can get any kind of recognition but none from my peers. Instead they don't on the ones who don't do nearly as much. And when I do thank people for helping me, they don't seem to appreciate that at all either. I truly don't feel like I have one single person there that appreciates me. The bosses seem to like but they seem to be friends and invite the one girl that everyone loves over to their house. There is one girl that I sometimes work with and I help her because I'm assigned to her. I do more work than what I should for her and I could do 1 thing wrong and she is absolutely mean a nasty. It's gotten worse since she believes that she will be accepted in the nursing school. She proceeded to tell a trainee in front of me today that another girl who I could do circles around was really good about jumping in and helping. Even though I do more work than this girl and probably do more work for this ungrateful he then than what she deserves What should I do, because at this point I hate my job so much I want to quit.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m going through a very similar situation. Just keep doing your best and focus on your work. I hope it gets better
If you're being left out of team emails that can have you looking unprepared and unprofessional I n front of higher managers. It can get to be a big deal that way.
What about coworkers who don't like you who are able to get your boss's ear and go out of their way to sabotage you or make you look bad (and for whatever reason, the boss takes their word at higher value than yours)?
I am a RN and have experienced personally and witnessed it happen to others. There's a saying in nursing school, "nurses eat their young" but as a seasoned RN with nearly 15 years experience the saying should be, "nurses eat each other". I've been in so many toxic work environments that I honestly feel that I want to change careers, not bc of what I do but bc of the catty and mean behaviors of the predominantly female workforce. In every position or department I've worked in I've experienced or seen coworkers get people put on performance improvement plans, get pushed out that they quit, even be fired. Like you said in previous videos, "HR is not your friend", you're 100% correct. What advice do you have for these types of situations?
(*it's really sad that many women continue to behave like high school girls. I don't know if it's a power thing, they're jealous or threatened by their "target", just mean...)
Which is ironic coming from a profession where everyone seems to recognize before they recognize medical assistant surgeons or even doctors. I truly believe and I mean no disrespect comment my dad is in RN so I do have love for them, but some of them I have to wonder if they're not in it for the money but disguised themselves with a mask of compassion
At the end of the day you are there to do a job, not form best buddy friendship
I wish I could accept this, but when decision makers/important people are close with coworkers (that dislike you), feel it can almost always make it tricky to manuever.
In that case, they're an Influencer if they have the ear of decision makers and being on their good side is ideal.
It's a different ball game when the establishment is institutionally Narcissistic and encourages toxic behaviour. Its imperative to educate oneself of on the complexities of dark personalities and protect yourself from emotional vampires 🧛♂️
Great advice and well said. I survived and was untouchable in a environment like that.I knew how to counter the attacks,prevent them and exude such love,light and positive professionalism it just left them frustrated and me beaming with victory in not folding to the foolishness.
@@hibiscushoney3759 this is remarkable. I am under attack right now.... I am the only light in a cess pit of really dark soul less creatures who relentlessly manufacture unprovoked attacks... I have been doing what you just described and its tough but finally yesterday this narcissistic woman had a melt down and exposed herself. All because I was being kind, smiling, offering to work during my holiday time as she refused to order items she requires herself.. basically she is cutting the branch she is sitting on... she has been smear campaigning me wanting me to be fired. I have been terminated but need to hand over my duties before I leave. I have to take my holidays else I lose them. She now refuses to learn my task so I can leave a functional Laboratory.... its crazy making
@@AKUBARIKI Those that hate your shine is because your light blinds them. Stay positive,stay focused and keep smiling. They are miserable and afflicted because they cannot bring you down with their toxic antics. Don't match their low dark energy. You belong in a better place that can match and enhance your vibe. Not try to dim your brightness.Good luck and be glad you are released from that pit of despair. Much light n love to you❣
Sorry for reviving an old thread. I've just joined my first corporate job and would like to learn the skills you've mentioned.
A coworker always rolls her eyes at me, and always looks like she hates my guts. Whenever I say something funny she shouts that my humour sucks, and then says something less funny that her group finds funny. She always favours the young pretty people in their 20s and she is above 60. She goes out of her way to treat everyone else way nicer than me.
Ask long as they don’t touch me....we’re good.
No thumbs down from me. I agree - it legit doesn't matter. I think it's important what you think of yourself first and then the people that are like you said making decisions about you etc. Great video as per usual Jennifer!
Happy Tuesday Jennifer 😃 - I would rather my co workers respect & emulate me then " like " me. I hope they , like me are satisfied with accomplishing our daily projects & knowing I am dependable & a straight shooter.
To me, that sounds like a very productive relationship with coworkers and should be the goal!
Most people don't like me. In fact I find trying to be liked drains yhr energy out of me and it almost always ends in people not liking me. I also have ADHD so I think part of it is unconscious discrimination because of how I work is not how a lot of people work. I had to learn differently than most people. I am also a nurse, and many nurotypical nurses are very judgemental.
Very much relate to this. I’m a lawyer with adhd. My working ways are also different from those around me and I feel because of this I was never destined to be liked in work places. It’s more about doing the work getting paid and going home
Hi Jennifer, I really appreciate your content! I have been watching your videos due to struggling lately with this fairly new job I have. It’s almost been 3 months working here (probationary period is almost over!!!) and I am finding it harder and harder to find reasons to hold onto this job. I really like my boss, which is always a plus. She is such a sweet person from pretty much all of the interactions I have had with her, but in terms of a few of my co workers, well, let’s just say we are not on the best of terms as of right now and things are awkward.
Basically, I voiced some of my offenses to them and they did not take it well and instead of talking with me directly, things just didn’t get resolved directly. One of my co workers who used to sit right next to me moved while I was on sick leave. Another one of my co workers just annoys me, but I don’t really talk to him any longer after he did something offensive. I just want to feel happy here like I used to before all this nonsense. I think the biggest mistake I made is becoming way too friendly with some co workers who I sit near. I would have loved to have seen your videos BEFORE I had made any mistakes, but they are learning lessons and I am trying not to dwell. Good news, most of the “higher ups” like me/are nice to me, and like I said, my boss and I are on good terms. It’s just this toxicity with some of my direct co workers I can no longer stand.
Does it bother you if a coworker dislikes you? LMK your thoughts.
I am only concerned if they are trying to get me fired or try to sabotage my work because they feel threatened.
My coworkers complained to the employer about me, making up lies and saying they feel intimidated by me. My employer decides to give me a disaplinary, I said I done nothing wrong.... disaplinary for what??! I done nothing wrong. Employer says to me.... if I hear anymore your in trouble. Its totally illogical....... when I see my coworkers they all seem friendly. So what the hell is the employer complaining about. I just had to leave the job. Im easy going very friendly & considerate.
Nothing works on my "Mean Girl", I have tried uplifting and asking for help with something she claims to be good at and nothing. Only upside is that I know it's out of jealousy. Six and a half months after I started I was given a promotion, but after 10 months she had to ask for a promotion.
We had conflict months ago; she and another co-worker were talking about trying to get me fired, I saw it and reacted right away. I walked into my supervisor's office, told her what was going on and that I was done for the day. I proceeded to walk past the boss and straight out to my car and headed home. Boss called to say that she was going to look into it herself and that she hoped I would come back. Two weeks later, I got a raise for taking the high road and for having to deal with her crap.
I know no one loves a tattle-tale but I moved to a new city and no one was going to fuck with my career, if it ends it's going to be because of something I do, not them.
It's been a while of me putting up with their shit and if I burst, it's not going to be pretty; feelings will be hurt.
I don’t give two shits about these people not liking me, I need them to HELP ME WHEN IM FORCED TO TRAIN UNDER THEM. They can’t act normal in a professional manner and separate emotions from work. Even if I don’t like someone, I still assist them at work because sabotaging someone at work doesn’t benefit me at all and has a higher probability of backfiring on me. I believe in karma.
Most women have very low moral in life, this is female nature.
I would agree with you in my previous company. I could work independently most of the time, and answered to my direct superiors, but my current employer throws their employees to the wolves and pretty much forces a lot of team interaction. If you are an admin that team interaction means they give you endless and non/ stop tasks. They throw everyone your way because they think it’s your job to handle everything that nobody else wants to do. That is the culture and it’s why I need to leave.
What if the coworker doesn't like you through feeling professionally threatened or envious, and at every opportunity complains that you aren't doing your job properly to management. While the information isn't accurate, it does seem like it influences managements perception of you. I don't like to complain, since I think it is unprofessional and it seems petty, but then I find they only get one side of the story and it negatively affects my chances of promotion. What can I do about this? It's so difficult to ignore when someone has begun a campaign to ruin your reputation, when all I want to do is get on with my work.
Speak with HR or talk to your supervisors directly. Personally, I prefer bringing issues up with HR first because they can be more neutral than superiors who might have favorites or their own agenda. Anyway, you have a voice too.
I remember I had a coworker falsely accuse me of something like harassment (when in reality he’s been harassing me). I didn’t do that at all and a new supervisor didn’t ask me my side of the story until I complained that I’m being punished or even looked down on for something I didn’t do. I was ready to escalate this issue to HR. Instead, I shared my story to the supervisor. The new supervisor then asked our mutual coworkers more info and spent more time in our department to realize the true nature of this employee who coincidentally requested to quit 2 weeks later from the day I defended myself. I say do your work well and speak up. I’m so glad that guy was an idiot. He tried to ruin my reputation and it seemed like my character and being there 2+ years did not matter to faceless management. What mattered is I spoke for myself and he was actually a really bad employee. I had a good reputation with my coworkers - I’m sure that helped too! I’m also thinking I should have reported to HR how my supervisors mishandled the situation TBH.
Your Video did not cover anything remotely even CLOSE to the torment I experience at work.
0:26 they don’t. They whisper and disperse when I am around. I get comments that make me feel they don’t think I am dumb. I am about to quit and never go out again.
In the scientific field, especially labs, it gets surprisingly impactful on your ability to grow/ certain things
I think that’s why so many are a little awkward and quiet. It’s nice to bump into friendly ones, though
I just finished a seasonal job as middle management and was sure all of my subordinates disliked me. I was Ms. Nice Guy all season long but had to become the heavy toward the end because no one else would step up and enforce company rules. Surprisingly, I still got thank you's from a few of them. Maybe they were just blowing smoke but there you go 🤷
As long as you are lower than them and they are better (position, salary, favourism) they will like you, the moment you get better than them they will hate you no matter what...
They dont like me because i dont hang out with them or gossip they are not friends do your job and go home
My ex managers hated me. They were toxic.
The best place I worked in we had some co-workers who didn't like each other, mainly personality conflicts, but we could all trust each other to do our jobs & help each other despite differences. No one was lazy & everyone pulled together. And we all commiserated about our crazy boss, lol. But trust made all the difference in the world. We didn't have to like each other to work well together.
I wish I had that period but I feel like a square peg in a round hole
I dont like none of my coworkers. Im a highly spiritual intuitive person and im keen on subtle things. Body language, good or bad vibes, eye language etc... The lord gives it to me naturally. I can sense a snake trust me 💯. Another thing my stomach start flipping, i get a throw up feeling inside me.
I just ran across your videos and thank God i did! i was feeling like a group of childish coworkers were throwing shade but I had to remember I really dont care lol
My boss likes me but some of my coworkers don't like me. Its toxic and at my last job it felt more like family. People knew me and they knew my sister. I actually fitted in. I dont like this new job nor the energy of this job. I plan on transferring to another department after I complete my 6 month probation period.
I would take it as a warning sign
Ms. Brick. Keep up the good work. I would be more aware of the Patty's you described. It truly amazing when you see the people you described in action. Two thumbs up.
We'll be calling back to the five villains often around here. If you haven't already watched the 3 types of difficult coworkers video I uploaded last week I highly recommend it!!
It’s important to respect to one another but not necessarily like
I appreciate you saying it does not matter. I made a bad first impression. When i started there. I was emotional i tried to be their friends and well. Apparently, according to a good friend, they may not like that im coming back to work. :(. Ive been off for a year. I thought they were. One of my coworkers said everyones positive about it. Now im feeling like they are dreading my return. My boss hates me. I lacked confidence. Happy i see that now and i hope i can change their opinion of me. They see me and the whinney girl who shares to much and always asks for help. Its not that i dont know. Im just a pushover and i feel like i need someone to back up what im saying. Not gonna do that no more. I know what i am doing and talking about....
Most of them like me but the ones that don’t are either jealous, or mad that they can’t control me
I think you're right and I think you're wrong. People spend more hours at work than they do with their families. We're pack animals. We strive to be part of a group. Not being liked at work, of being excluded and isolated is akin to being on the outs in a community. Most people work because they need the money, but people consistently across the board say the most important things they get from work have nothing to do with money. You can be disliked--which even if people are professional but distant takes a toll--and function but it would be a miserable existence. You don't need to be best friends, but you need allies, you need people who will take your back when needed. People that you can trust and do the same for--work as a team. Being in an environment where you are always on guard, protecting yourself, alone. No. I think it matters.
I agree with you. I would not like to spend 40+ hours per week around people who dislike me. As humans we can feel unpleasant energy from others. Even if someone is outwardly professional and polite, we can still feel it and it ain't good. Being around people who exude negative energy towards us consistently affects our mental health.
@Tracy Jewels I don't know. Sometimes if you are disliked simply for work performance, you can improve that and their attitude will change. Occasionally, there could also be misunderstandings that can later be corrected. At a previous job, a manager became enraged after a customer complained about me. Later, I became one of the restaurant's favorite and highest-performing employees. Now they absolutely love me, whereas previously, I believe that they despised me.
So yes, under some circumstances, you might be able to correct others' attitudes towards you, but we also can't forget that sometimes people will dislike you for no valid reason. If you have verified that your coworkers and boss hate you due to envy or some personal bias related to something like your race or sexual orientation, you might as well just make a plan to leave that job and find a work environment where the people are less toxic and hostile.
My co-worker is yelling and screaming at me for doing my work. She also yelled at me and called me name and hit my arm. Plus hiding my work from me.
I just found out that my coworkers gossip badly about me, but everyone smile at me, going forward I will just be professional with no desire to social activities on the office, but like Jen said, it doesn't matter but there is a but, if you're a junior and your seniors hate you it is difficult as they won't be available to teach you relevant staff, that's my case... however I've found a solution since I have good relationship with the management (got promoted this year in just 6 months of joining) of being a top performer (reason the team hates me lol) so its fine for me, at the end of the day only outputs matter, the social part of your coworkers not much.
thankfully i do not have coworkers ! you are awesome sauce !
I dont want to be liked, I want to be understood. Can you do a video on how to be understood?
Understood in what way? To have your value and impact known and celebrated?
@@JenniferBrick to be recognized, valued, self expressions, behavior, working patterns and emotional tendencies understood.
In my experience, it is often (usually) an overarching influence by an illegal group that is picking on (targeting) someone. The harboured goal (resentment is not a goal) is almost always criminal, or worse. I take hate that is allowed in a workplace very, very seriously as I look for something else. Now, after decades of it, ppl are starting to pick on "looking (for)"...brackets (parentheses) notwithstanding.
What if the co-worker who does not like you always invite your staff members out for lunch. So could that co-worker inject her dislike of you into the team members.
Very pathbreaking insights,Madam Jennifer ☺️
ur videos help me a lot, when i feel insecure in life and work
but what happens when your manager is toxic? :/
I was born in Seattle in 1973, where I grew up. Japanese-American. Male. I have at least two stories on this topic. Maybe, this proves that geography DOES come into play: Years ago, a then 40s woman named Patty, from Kentucky, was hired to be a supervisor. Heavy Kentucky accent (not that I had a problem with it). I admit, the women at my office are VERY guarded and standoffish, and I just accepted that, and "leave them alone." Well, Patty lasted literally less than a month, before resigning. She said, "They don't like me." On the other hand, I worked with a VERY loud and obnoxious Italian-American young woman named Susan, who preferred to roam around and socialize with colleagues, even for 30 minutes (before our office cracked down on productivity). In a nutshell, I knew that Susan didn't care for me, because I just worked hard (I NEVER glared at Susan when she socialized, and I sure the heck never tattled on her), and didn't get into talking about her personal life. I don't care for certain peoples' "verbal autobiography" that they seem to like to share, every time they come into the office. If I'm not liked by them, then heck with them!
What if your coworkers don’t like you because you’ve been toxic for years (bringing marital problems into the workplace) and you’ve been on a healing journey, left the toxic marriage, and you’re trying to be better but everyone still looks at you with distrust and like they’re waiting for the next outburst? It may not matter for your career advancement if your coworkers don’t like you, but it does matter for your mental health. Oh, and management hates me most of all. They’ve been holding a grudge against me for years.
My situation is that I have to be in the same office space as someone that works in another group. While I don't work directly with him for the most part, there might be some times collaboration is required between both our groups.
I was at my job for years before this person started. One time not long after he started I needed some help from his group so I went to ask him. Guy wouldn't even look at me from the computer screen. He also goes out of his way to avoid me, for example if he's walking back to his desk and he sees me walking towards him, he'll quickly change directions and go another way. Things like that. After a while of that sort of constant disrespect, I dislike him as much as he may dislike me. I'm just praying he either gets fired or finds another job.
Actually, leaving you off of an email could be detrimental to your success if they do it more than once.
Or it can be obvious that they have poor communication skills that cost the company time and money. All depends on how well you're playing the game.
@@JenniferBrick I have a true story where a colleague blind copied our team so she could leave me off of informative emails. I was new to the company. This was her way of intentionally sharing important information without anyone noticing I was missing from the email. Eventually people caught on, but it takes others speaking up to rectify that situation and I was always walking around uninformed. Very toxic.
I know someone who was really disliked by a secretary. The secretary had been at the company years and the disliked girl was new. Made things horrible for her. It does happen. Soon as she was ‘let go’ the secretary started on me. I could only tolerate it because I was only there on a contract.
Too much work and everyone is my current workplace are super busy and being a new hire I have so many questions. But I am afraid to ask as they won’t really help me
I started a job with another lady. From day 1 she was off , abrupt and cut me out. Then another girl joined from another branch and that lady became close friends and both against me. Now they both bully me every day , rude and boss me around. It makes me feel humiliated and very sad and stressed. I have done nothing to them and it affects my health
The co workers are good friends with the manager and they are feeding the manager negative information about me so I Totally disagree with you the co workers ruin my health and it’s likely as they are on good terms with manager I am screwed
This is so helpful
You are awesome. You give great advice. ❤
It's true. It's tough as an extrovert trying to be friendly. You're pretty much the only one doing it and you're always the only one laughing when something is funny. You're the odd one out. One day, i gave up and made my job my job, and my home my home.
I work at small market but my co workers never asked me how are you what been up to . I don't know where i fit in .
I have never been like by any of the co workers at different jobs. I talk to them ask them questions it's like some how I offended but did not.? At any job I had never felt welcome at all.
Hi I really enjoy your videos. I really relate to this. I think they dont like me. They are nice but they dont like talking to me but they talk to each other. So I started ignoring them. I dont know how to navigate or get through this. They dont really ask me for help unless really necessary. Other than saying hi and bye I stopped talking to them. I dont really need to work much with them because we are responsible for different channels anyways. I am so happy you think it does not matter what they think. 😅
I’m financially free but I still have to work in a job, cause is family business and coworkers always fight…is so difficult to get out. I cannot quit my boss says
It does happen, if your face fits, then fine. If it doesn't, God help us! Not every workplace is the same. I've come across this this once or twice. Clickey colleagues have always been around,
I know you say it doesn't matter but it really does if the person is your Manager and can have control over you being promoted. I think many years my boss did not like me and his decisions impacted me. He kept me from Higher ups and everything.
I think you missed the part where I said it's important for people who make decisions about your pay, promotions and performance reviews. Rhode decision makers and influencers are crucial and being in their good side is non negotiable.
@@JenniferBrick I saw that and I agree with it. I was just emphazing my point because say they are the coworkers and your boss like them and prefers them over you. It also can impact you too if those coworkers do not like you. Your boss could be friends with the coworkers who do not like you. I saw it happen at my job.
Do you have any videos in the makings that deal with disabled workers. People with autism etc. I had to quit a temp job due to management being anti disabled. The recruitment agency is raising this further up the chain. I’m in the UK btw and we have a disability bill from 2010 that makes this illegal.
I just work, then get paid. That is all I am there for. In a few years, this will not matter anymore. And I will forget all of them.
I don’t care what anyone thinks about me! Especially co workers
Same
Thank you Jennifer. Always a good reminder for me 🩷
@ajoyforlife1 nailed it: watch out if you are an overachiever: coworker envy is real and you will likely get attacked by your peers and managers. Yes, depending on how dysfunctional and political the environment is you work in, coworkers liking you can matter.
It is actually on one job performance review, in writing, "stop being a perfectionist and reach 100% performance, practice reaching the engineering 80% of solution. "
I get along with peers, it was just those peers aiming for promotion. 🙄
What do you do, if you’re coworker is only willing to help because they’ll get something in return from you? For example, I had training questions/needed assistance with my task and my coworker said you owe me. So I bought said person a Cola. But now I don’t even want to ask for help..
Favors are currency, your coworker is taking that literally. You shouldn't have to buy a coworker something if they answer a training question. All someone else if you can, they can limit themselves all the want
Depends on so many factors, but in our work setting it worked out best when we cut them short, and told the person that we are here to work, not for favours.
For instance, we had people who came in to do an extra shift when someone was off sick and they went on how they "came in to help".
No, mate, you don't come to "help", it was your choice to come in, now you are here to do your job.
You don't "owe them" anything, it's not a prison culture, they get paid a salary to do their job.
Then there's another thing. I also learnt very early in a previous work setting that when you "help" somebody if they are behind with their work, the next time they'll just assume it's your job to do the same thing again. (Yep, they were behind because they were slow and lazy to start off with.)
What if's affects your mental health and effectiveness in the workplace? I don't want everyone to like me. I have a very specific circle of people that I'm friends with...but when 5 people are nonstop against me and always have a problem with me it's really messing me up.
i just work on this company full with other same race co worker except me . i tried be nice be they had this hate looking eye on me .
But bosses r unwilling to spend time diffusing conflicts so they will decide who has to leave. Iit cld be the new joinee
Thank you so much
Thanks for hanging with me today, Joana! Hope you're having a good week so far.
In this world today i can't trust nobody whether its co workers family or so called friends
Both jobs asked me who I voted for...all went down hill after that. 1st. 2 jobs lasted 2years of hell one job 3 years of hell last job 8 months of hell..now done.
and I got pictures🤔
I have a BIG rant coming up about talking politics at work and how toxic it is.
@@JenniferBrick good luck with that, they hound you with different people with the same questions till you give..then they run in a corner snd start poking in their phones as a group..😒
Jennifer, Have a quick question. Love your channel. Work at a major retailer and I'm on the DM promotion list. I have a new boss since January and he is never around. He falsified visits and has lost 6 out of 13 manager's. I. Have heard the reason I have not been promoted is him. Very reliable source. I gave notice and no one seems to care. Should I say something before I go or just move on. My numbers all good just a FYI. Need advice.