Parenting 101 -Teal Swan-
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- Опубликовано: 28 май 2014
- In this episode, Teal offers sound advice for how to raise children in an "in alignment" way instead of an "out of alignment" way. She covers the dos and the dont's of parenting.
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Teal Swan is a revolutionary for personal transformation and is one of The Most Spiritually Influential Living People in the world. As a renowned author, speaker and social media star, she travels the world teaching self-development and teaching people how to transform their emotional, mental, physical and spiritual pain.
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Beginning Song:
Kuan Yin's Mantra (c) 2002 Lisa Thiel
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I am a young single mom raising a 4 year old girl. a part of me wants to cry bc I have been doing this all wrong, another part of me is excited because I learned something and I am ready to start applying. I have to remind myself that it isn't to late. If anybody has any books or videos to suggest to help me let me know. This video is amazing and has helped me to realize so much. thank you teal thank you so much for this.
Homecoming by John Bradshaw
Thanks dude.
Maegan Lindig I've JUST discovered 'Healing your aloneness' by Margaret Paul, it's bloody awesome. I might read her other books too.
+Ladig “Nicole” yasoul Literally every single other Teal Swan video will help you with parenting somehow. By helping yourself heal, you will be more connected with your ability to be a better parent. Throughout a majority of her videos she will also mention how our childhood is affecting us now and how our parents unconsciously continued the cycle of unhealthy emotional issues, etc. which we then pass on to the people around us (and especially our children) - as well as how we can heal from these wounds and break the unhealthy cycle.
Her videos are all about healing the emotional body, getting in touch with emotions, connection, and a million other amazing things - of which psychology can attest to. I'm a psych major and every single video of hers strikes a cord with me.
Well ONE the fact that you are a psyche major and this material is resonating with you says a lot! This has been validation for me because I was watching her videos and then stopped. I think bc I was watching tons every single day and not letting my mind and subconscious take in the information and reflect on it! Im going to start watching one every day, or every other day, or once a week! Thanks for commenting Im ready to get back on the path...or did I ever leave? lol jkjk...this really encouraged me! :)
wow. i'm pregnant and this just totally remade me rethink so many things. its kind of crazy how i had already inadvertently started living vicariously through my child who literally isn't even born yet! crazy!!
One of the biggest realizations I had while studying psychology at university: Punishment does not work. This revelation changed how I see children and the world, and helped me understand my own childhood trauma.
After watching your videos, I completely changed my parenting skills. And the growth in my child's development has been amazing in just a month. I feel more calm and relaxed and so has my daughter has changed as well. She is almost 2.5 years and I don't fee like I need to fight her with every task now. Thank you
Amazing advice. Culturally, this has been a struggle for me with the punishment vs consequence concept. Culture advocates for punishment instead of consequence but expects the child to magically understand consequence and independence as an adult. I think the main idea is to relinquish control over our kids. Their freedom is at stake if we don't. I love this, I feel as if someone finally understands how I feel about this....very refreshing
DO NOT:
Strip the child of their self concept.
Find fault and criticize them
Do everything for them. They have to make their own choices. We can’t think for them, we should not lecture, threat, or punish them. Instead make them aware of consequences and do not punish them for having those consequences. Do not rescue them from their problems; they should try to solve things themselves. We can just offer help.
Don’t feed tem un-useful beliefs.
DO:
Build a healthy strong self concept: let them think about the consequences and let them make their own decision if that is what they want as a consequence.
Let them learn from their choices. Offer empathy and understanding for “wrong” choices, be an ally and support instead of “I told you so”.
Let them solve their own problems.
Allow them to have choices.
Allow them to make a loooot of mistakes, this is better now than at an older age.
You have no control over them and what they want. But you do have control over yourself and so make them do things in a way that gives them a free choice instead of forcing them to do it.
Keep calm and stay in alignment: if it is difficult to parent and the child sees that, it creates a horrible self-concept for them that they are bad. If a child sees that they are easy/good to parent, they develop the self-concept that they are good.
Put more time in enjoying and fun instead of delivering consequences: they will gravitate towards positivity instead of avoiding negativity.
Set limits and at the same time teach them life abundance. And that they can create their own abundance which comes not only through the parent.
We need a series that speaks directly to teens
Yes!!, please!!
One of the worst things that I remember my parents doing when I was a kid was forcing me to eat when I wasn't even actually hungry nor did I like the food they gave me. I remember sitting at the table for over an hour fighting with my mom over me eating some gross pork and cooked vegetables. I would never force a kid to eat when they are not truly hungry or make them eat something they do not want.. especially pork lol
Or how about when you are 6 or 7 years old and you tell your mother you are hungry and she tells you to get a piece of processed cheese slice on a daily basis because she is too busy sleeping at 1 pm.
Jacob Hafer Hahaha omg I'm petty sure that literally happened to me. My mom would get drunk and then tell me to go make a grilled cheese. LOL
I'm the same way I was always reminded of how many children are starving in the world
I remember my stepmother forcing me to eat liver when I was seven years old. I remember having to surreptitiously drop it into my lap when she wasn’t looking. I just detest liver but she insisted I eat it. What a freak.
sad
Someone teach this to the school system
Nah They’re too concerned in creating cogs than humans
Hi. I work in a school. I will do this 🙂
I totally agree with you with the ugliness of ferberization technique.
I have always looked at it as a crime.
There are no bad choices or decisions. Successful people turn bad choices and decisions into WISDOM. This totally chumps my inherited belief of needing to be perfect all the time.
I've worked as a nanny part-time for the past three years just because I enjoy it so much. It is actually surprising to me when I watch some parents to be completely unaware of the difference of when their child is crying out of need or out of manipulation. It seems so obvious to me but the child's own mother has no idea. This is actually only one family I've worked with but it still surprises me that this is even possible that a biological mother can be so out of tune with their young child.
It is always 'assumed' that motherhood is 'innate'. However those of us who work with kids see the whole broad spectrum of 'parenting' and this is certainly not necessarily the case.
Claire Lou It makes me wonder if those people only have children because it is what they feel they are supposed to do. Which is too bad for the kids ...
"You don`t really understand love, until you have a child" Indeed!
It depends. Once my sister asked my mom if she felt like her whole world changed when she had me (her first child) and she just looked confused. My dad was even worse.
People tell me I should have a child so that I know what its like to feel true love and I just think I don't want to love some that much. Like my boyfriend says like your heart is beating outside your chest. Also in my life it has been easy to find people to love, but hard to find people that will love me back.
People don't talk about it, but I actually think there's more unconditional love for children towards their parents than for parents towards their kids. Both of my parents loved their abusive mothers and would do anything for them. Both of my parents have put their mothers before me and my sister.
Sorry to hear that :(
Sounds like your parents have unresolved parent issues themselves, what is blocking them from avoiding the same behaviors with you.
As a parent to an amazing 4 year old, I can relate to the saying that the parent-child love is the most unconditional. It's not in all cases, but most parents are loving... some are just confused about how to go about showing that love. And some purely have personal issues that distance them from their kids.
I hated my parents when I was growing up, then when we moved far from their parents, they became better parents. When they let go of their pasts, they stopped re making their mistakes. By that time I've grown older, became a parent and was able to forgive them all their little mishaps as parents.
I realize now that my mom loves me probably in a way that I could never love her back. And her intentions were always good, may have the way been not the best one.
And if no one told you the love you today, know that I do!
Just remember to be your own person, not your parents version of you... Try to distance yourself if you can't get through to them... but still be kind to them and forgive them and let that blame for them go in time, to free yourself of their own human boundaries.
Peace
i wish if my parents had even only 10% of your wisdom Teal, they fucked my Life up a big time, and my feelings towards them are already dead.
Thaiboxer80 forgiveness.
Remember "forgiveness is a gift for you, not for them". And I totally feel you, I have parents just like yours.
Thank you so much for this video. You are absolutely correct. My youngest son is turning 18 this month and what you said at the end of this video about trusting him to know what is right for him is exactly what I need to do. He is an amazing person with a terrific sense of right and wrong and he has amazed me so many times while he was growing up with incredibly profound words of wisdom that I would have never expected to hear from someone his age. I do trust him to do the right thing for him. I just need to make sure that he knows that. He is gonna do great.
Listen to this! This is how I raised my boys and now mid 20's are strong self assured young men in leadership roles that aren't afraid to take risks for what they want.
Though at times when I compared my way with others I felt like a bad parent, glad I ignored those feelings
One interesting time was they decided they didn't want to go to school anymore so we loosely homeschooled for a year in the end they missed the social interaction and decided they wanted to go back, one of those boys ended up with a double science degree at this countries most prestigious university the other had his pilot's licence at 14 payed for by himself working and winning scholarships
just sounds like you had enough money to throw at them to be successful no matter what. If your kid wants to be a rockstar and you pay for a national tour, then they're going to be a rockstar. Duh.
Great advice except for one thing which you should emphasize. Most of us are dysfunctional and the best thing we can do to help our children is to find our spirituality and the first step and the only step which should be emphasized is Meditation. Meditation will lead you on into your own healing. Know thyself!!
I struggle with not showing my kid the negative side of me. My bad days, my lonilness or sadness. I have learned I am human but I will definitely take the video on board. Thank u xxx
I hear you! Sounds like me 5 years ago. There is hope for you my dear, the key is to learn to give yourself all that you wish others would: recognition, acceptance, love, time, attention, forgiveness... When you treat yourself the way you'd like to be treated, there won't be much of a negative side left, and however much is still a part of you, you'll be able to be honest about it! I'm sending you so much love right now, may blessings shower upon you!
this is useful to watch even when reparenting your inner child
Thank you! I just got it. I can’t wait to parent my children by example and enjoy my chores and trust them. I have 12 and 14 year old kids.
I'm a grown man (shhh)... and wish I could get adopted for that kind of childhood experience :) Think I'll replay this one, also. It's "Hook'd on Teal" month, again.
Teal is three years younger than me, and I think all the time I wish she would adopt me.
my parents set me up to have the belief "I can't" and I'm still struggling to get out of it and I need to get out of it now more than ever as I'm sitting my GCSEs soon (GCSEs are tests set up for students age 15 - 16 in england)
You can❤️
Thank you Teal. I would have liked to hear this earlier and yet its all coming perfectly in time. I look forward to applying these principles going forward. Much love. Namaste.
I am the rescuer and my husband is the dictator....I'm sure this makes our son confused at times. I really enjoyed this video and will do my best to put into action what has been said. xoxo
Probably what it does is make him think women are rescuers and men are dictators.
TarraAncientStar That’s basically how I grew up. Very problematic.
BOTH OF YOU are overly involved into your kid and destroying its independence . Over-enabling and over-restricting is TOO MUCH implication. Just don't get SO involved.
I must say, as a woman fully connected to zero-point energy as Unconditional Love, parenting one of the new children in these times is THE SINGLE MOST DIFFICULT TASKS!!! I KNOW EXACTLY what to do... but it is a matter of releasing the triggers of mind control which have been engrained in us since our own birth! Those of us at the zero-point level of awakening are given the most amazing and difficult, all powerful but raw souls as children to enable and WOW is it tough! The KNOW they are infinite all KNOWING beings, but BOY they were not necessarily prepared for this world and are breaking down all structures of old... even and especially family titles!
I am friends with Melinda Melanympha (she came to visit me in Big Bear/Lake Arrowhead) and I am excited to meet your physical form... for I know your from Zero-Point as I know The Self that is All, is You, is Me
single mum of a premature baby. thank you so much for changing my daughters life.
The fact this only has 99k views is sad more parents especially father's need to watch this video. As a father to a beautiful baby girl this is a wonderful lecture to listen to and take from.
Where were you 3 decades ago????
She was being ritualistically abused and tortured, to become the light being she is now.
I belong to a support group where I get to see 65 year old mothers do the inner work and allow their adult children to be themselves without conditions. I get to see that no matter what age the adult children are, healing can take place. Good luck.
😂😂😂😂lol that's so true
Well i'm a better mom than i thought
Same I though Iv been to nice when my daughter told me “ your so much nicer then grandma she would have yelled at me!” She left the water thing open and it dripped on the floor and I said oh you did that? It’s ok I do that sometimes to! Can u help me clean it?
Thank you, Teal
This concept is almost exactly the concept taught in the love and logic parenting course. I highly recommend it. I also recommend that when you feel like your loosing control you revisit the material again. Thanks for the video Teal!
Thank you, I've noticed the mistakes in my behaviour and so grateful, that you share your ways of parenting and thinking, it helps.
"I'm doing this for your own good!", "Cruel to be kind," "Children should be seen and not heard," "You don't know you're born!! "I had it harder in my day," "You should respect your elders," "Do as your told". LOL, I love parental directives like this. Totally baseless and unquestioned.
My grandmother's favorite was "because you're under my roof." So, at 21 I moved to Las Vegas, moved in with two male roommates and became a cocktail waitress. (she's southern baptist) She was like, "I don't approve." And, I said, "You always said the the only reason I have to follow you're rules was because I'm under your roof. Well, I pay rent now and I'm going to get my money's worth."
You come in to life infinite and Beautiful we don’t need to hate and shouldn’t hate the life the universe gave us
I share the same parenting beliefs and im always making mistakes and learning everyday. but I always reflect on my beliefs. I have teens now and boy is it hard work. teens really test your skills. all my 6 children are individually different and our personalities all dont get along but thats what makes my home so loud, so interesting, so much fun but sometimes sad. if any parent is looking for an idea to help your kids start to find who they really are and a great school holiday excercise, no matter the age. even little ones enjoy this 'the find your spiritual animal meditation' not only does it calm if things are kaotic but it creates great open discussion afterwards. you'll be amazed how accurate their choice of animal perfectly represents. just an idea. p.s the hardest part of pardnting for me was when a boy broke my daughter heart for the first time. all I could do was lay with her and hug her through her pain. we have no control. but when your 18yr old little girl says can you sleep here tonight mummy is the best reward from parenting.
I have 2 male parents, one of witch is a psychologist. As i get older i realise how he used the principles of psychology with his kids. He emotionally withdrew often and the family went threw high levels of stress. Not all his fault but both of them barley hugged us. this story could go deeper and trust me ill start to dive but ill end it here.
I discovered you after I discovered Dolores cannon! You two together have changed my life!
thankyou teal swan, I am in oar of your messages and I know I will be the person I want to be and the person my children can look up too even though I feel I wasn't so in alignment before. but now is a new thought a new way of thinking and a start towards my newer vibration of who it is I am meant to be. Thankyou
This should be taught to EVERYONE!
How I wish I knew all of this before I started this parenting journey and at the same time I am so happy that my son is the reason I woke up and am changing. Thank you for this video
Teal, thank you so much. This video is incredible and so are you. You saved my life yet again.
wow this is an eye opener teal. i am greatful for your teachings for one day i shall be a great guider to a great child.
As a mother I thank u from the bottom of my heart ❤
You have changed my life for the better. Thank you so much. I am immediately going to buy your books as well.
Awesome video! Everything made perfect sense. This will definitely help me do my best as a mum when the time comes, through conscious teaching and understanding. Thank you Teal!!
Thank you so much for this video !
Perfect video at the perfect timing! Thanks Teal! 🙏🏽
Exactly! thank you Teal!
Wonderful wisdom from Teal! Thank you so much!
This is fantastic. It scares me think I might have had a child before watching this video.
Thanks so much Teal. It's inspiring.
Thank for sharing these wonderful concepts.
Teal, you're brave and stunningly divine. I can tell that at moments you were relating these truths to your parents' actions in memory. I can assume that your memories inspired these truths. Thank you. You have my open attention.
Whoa. Becoming the right example for your children is so crucial. You hit the nail right on the head. Self concept and freedom. Too true.
Thank you so much Teal very valuable
I love you Teal. you are so awesome thank you for everything ♡
Thank you Teal Swan ....
I never had such parents and I never learnt any of these all my life
But I am happy I get to watch this video because it reminds me of what is important.
I am so lucky that way even though I work at it solo :) now
Feeling happy that I worked hard to eke out my true self-concept and to preserve my truth. I am sure the universe wanted what I am becoming
Teal swan, I can’t thank you enough!
Teal Swan, thank you again for creating this video. You have helped me learn to heal in so many different ways and I appreciate your guidance.
AMENNNN!!! Sadly my parents made all these mistakes and I became very unhealthy. But now I’m better and am using your advice while caretaking my neice 🙂 very rewarding and healing full circle
Best parenting advice I ever received was "Plan for nothing and you Will be ready for anything "
Unfortunately my kids were grown and I chose to use it with all my heart. My Littles have always been my teacher's and I express my gratitude for lessons and apologize for mistakes when needed. Love and logic. Consequences and empathy are the best teacher's in my opinion. Mistakes can be a tool or a weapon depending on how you use them.
And I view emotional suffering as a growing pain. Nothing more.
I set the intention of finding my truest self for on the" fools moon" this past Friday. Which brought me to my anger. I sat with my anger Friday to Sunday as much as I could. I took breaks when I needed them. 🙈🙉🙊
❤✌️
Thanks Teal !!
Thank you Teal.
I appreciate all you are in all ways you choose to express it for the benefit of all. You R beautiful lovely refreshing and passionate with aligned intent to bring healing to one of the most important bonds thay exist- the child/caretaker.....thankyou so MUCH
Teal, Thank you sooooo much. 🕉
Beautiful, thank you teal
Simply the best
I need to hear this
I loved your video! It really showed me the importance of guiding. Parenting does seem like a challenge since you do want the best for your children. I just really want my children to be truly happy and to feel free to be who they want to be. See.. I grew up with a very strict father and a very passive mom. Super opposite! So, that taught me to try to be inbetween as a parent.. Which is like you mentioned.. Guideness and support. Not forcing them, neither doing things for them. Just letting them learn with our guideness. (: awesome advice! ... Also, I still truly love both of them! I know that they both worked hard to raise me. We're not perfect... So I love them no matter what (:
I can't believe how crazily in good time this is!
+jchahine all of this information came from a program called "love and logic". And it all actually works really well. Moly four year old knows how to do dishes, make her bed, clean her room and many other things because of that program. Every moment is a learning opportunity and should be treated as such.
Thank you. I needed this❤
Now Feeling Gratitude for You and this message Teal. Thank You for posting it.
You passed the message in a beautiful, clear and authentic way.
For me, this is one of your bests! :)
Just for sharing a bit of my own experience, this video came to me late at night when I got home after an amazing "spiritual day", with amazing people, full of great insights....and your words were absolutely perfect! Very clarifying and invigorating! Thank You also for the "courage" of saying it, even though I think you were so clear that there is no way someone could say you are being contradictory or anything like that.
Thank You!
Muito Obrigado! :)
Thank you Teal 🙏♥️
I had to cry and laugh while watching this one! Thanks Teal! And also I love the quilting on the quilt behind you :-)
Wow that was Beautiful, thank you for sharing!
Teal is the greatest. 52 ppl dislike and that tells me. It’s part of your characters.
This is very valuable lesson in life.
My mom is the greatest.
Thank you Teal. Huge.
Thank you. 🌈
Great video. I think things on my own and sometimes question it…. Then to hear it confirmed by teal is just a great confirmation. I don’t think I’ve ever found anything she’s said that I didn’t resonate with. I don’t know why some people “don’t like her” maybe they can’t handle the truth? She’s so pretty and likeable. And funny. Such a strong woman I feel like she’d be a great honest friend. So much empathy and wisdom.
Im expecting and i took many notes down :)
If you want to attempt to heal your own childhood issues, things like Iboga can take you back to those memories and help reprocess the Memory to release the emotional charge that may be associated with those Memories, thus helping repair any old trauma's etc that we are still carrying into our current lives
Thank you again
Amazing human being!
you are soooo smart....
Brilliant. ..
Thank you so much for this video. As a single mother w/a 14 yo strong willed son; I totally get it. I know I can't control him, just wish I didn't feel guilty about his choices because they do affect me as well. Is it safe to love them, but be detached at the same time?
I love you Teal !
Thankyou Teal
Just remember don't stress enjoy your children.
Kids feel our energy most and react accordingly. don't over think it
Everything will work out!
if you are here it means your on the right track, we are all trying to upgrade from past generational mistakes and old ways of thinking.
like i have so much work to do from my own conditioning that takes time and i am a single parent and all that they have and the time i am taking to heal myself is still time im taking away from them to be raised in a way that is beneficial to them
You are a goddess. So insightfull. Thankyou. Wish there were more like you x
You're Great
Omg this is GOLD!!! ❤️❤️
This is awesome! It really resonates with my own beliefs on child guidance. I'd love to hear your thoughts on education and the current education system! :)
Beautiful .
Teal's son is going to be incredibly successful, in terms of emotion, mental and physical.
hopefully...or maybe he will totally rebel and self-destruct
can't wait to use this on my neices,and my future kids :-)
Every parent should hear this
Thanks Teal, you're amazing :)
I am really enjoying your videos. Have you ever studied Maria Montessori and the Montessori Method? I am a Montessorian and many of your beliefs align with the Montessori philosophy.
Best parenting advice ever
Totally lifted from the teaching of Abraham