whats funny is GPS's a majority of the time, for highway roundabouts, will just send you CONSTANTLY going around them, until you make an executive decision to figure shit out yourself. My source is us... me and my brother... he was the driver, and I was staring at the GPS baffled... it then, told us to take a road... *and then turn fucking back around to the god damn roundabout...*
@@Laughing_Dragon >a majority of the time I have literally never encountered that, nor have i ever heard that from a single other person. Kinda sounds like a specific location/GPS issue
@@declanbennett1085 well I'm sure for YOU it was that way, and for many others, but any time I've talked about roundabouts with family, friends, or coworkers, a few times people who were customers at the store I work at, people get a bit of a stare, and comment on it lol.
Campaign for North Africa just a week away guys!!! Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week
tell valefisk to make a Campaign for North Africa video on April 1st and its just him twerking in monkee suit for 5 seconds OR for long enough to get midroll adds to bonus the insult
One time on City Skylines 1, I had a pretty decent city, but the traffic was absolutely horrendous. I realized that, when downloading a bunch of car models, I had accidentally added an Amish horse and buggy. It had a max speed of 10mph.
Reminds me of that one driver's ed exam question that was a diagram of an interchange with "Who goes first?" and someone commented "Everyone all at once, but watch out"
I was so disappointed to learn that the so called 26 lane road was just 6 lanes in each direction with a set of lanes for high occupancy and access lanes. Thankfully Valefisk is here to bring the true 20 lane roads that America deserves.
Satisfactory taught me that i can fix any problem by just stacking more stuff vertically. So just build a second road above the first road and then build a third road above the second road and continue until the problem is fixed.
I sadly learned that it's a four lane highway that splits into 25 toll booths. It's just that the toll booths were double stuffed due to holiday traffic. Houston's Katy Freeway still holds the claim for most deranged infrastructure planners... For now.
@@Quicksilvir Damn, there goes another internet misconception. In that case: This is impressive Vale; you’ve almost matched Houston infrastructure planners when they created the Katy Freeway in Texas!
So I went to read the comments under that r/shittyskylines post, and the funniest joke of this entire video is how those guys are genuinely BEWILDERED by vale's city
I have been recently binging the game recently too. In my foolish European mindset i build a lot of public transport and still have traffic. Thank you for showing me the light of the blessed American Traffic Engineers.
hello everyone welcome to several hours of work- how many videos (playing the game/major speaking role/was shown in the initial names shot, not including the co-op horror video essay) have all of vale's friends been in, of the last 57 videos. i'm almost certain i missed some people though, so if you have corrections let me know Vale- all 57 of them Lynx- 30 chamber- 29 Solll- 28 Novel- 26 maivi- 25 aiden (candy)- 25 Teddy- 24 Dyno- 22 Pedejo- 12 Virtrial- 12 Jan- 10 Sylvia Temod- 9 Dom- 6 Wes- 6 rue- 5 Scutch- 4 sam- 2 Spiff- 2
the thing is, induced demand is a real thing up until you reach the point where every person who could conceivably use the road has their own dedicated lane!
2:20 Vale to Novel: "I'm undoing your fixes because they actually solve the problem, my content doesn't exist if it all works correctly." I had to pause the video from laughing.
@@TheSkyGuy77 New York and Jersey are also on that list mate Rural NY and Jersey, not so much but that's where the only decent people in those states live
if you think about it, adding more lanes will actually eventually fix traffic. eventually the cityscape will be so hellish no one would be able to live there nor associate with it unless they were trying to just pass through, turning the entirety of the globe into one big freeway where everyone crashes the human race into extinction and leaves behind a trafficless oblivion.
I am not gonna lie, during the ad read for Genshin Impact, I thought you were gonna say we can now stream it directly into our brains with your patented ApeLink™ technology.
For Houston it actually kinda works and traffic isn't as egregious as metropolitan areas can be but we will eventually start feeling it once the other half of california/new york's population finishes moving here.
My father is a civil engineer. Designs roads, bridges, and you guessed it, highways. A few months ago I decided to ask him how work has been-- It's not something I inquire about much, and I was curious. So imagine my disbelief when he starts talking about how he recently went to a meeting where there was discussion of one of the other divisions in the company being tasked to add another lane onto one of those massive Texas highways. To say I popped off would be an understatement, because this meme has lived-rent free in my head for YEARS. Then I had to explain to my (reasonably) confused father why I was so excited about a new development for a highway in a state I have never been to, hahaha.
A Genshin impact sponsorship AND a certified Chinese urban engineering classic? I didn't know Vale has pledged his alliance to the illustrious People's Republic of China
The fucking Allmost Meat dog conspiracy was the funniest shit considering that that was purely just the game being broken so much and the fact that it's just an actual normal asset in the game. One day those fuckers at Damien Bite will be brought to justice for what they did to Berry and Ace.
All these dogs remind me of a game called "Dog's Life" for PS2 where you play as a dog & eventually discover that an evil woman is turning dogs into processed cat food in an evil dissecting factory
As he stood witness to the beauty that Vale had created, he despaired for he knew he could never recreate such magesty, such beauty, such magnificence.
I mean you're right, but you have to add another lane to the exit lane. and that means an exit lane for your exit lane. which needs an exit lane to your destination. but one lane isn't enough, you have to have at LEAST two, but two must eventually turn to one so you need an exit for your exit for your exit for your destination!
Only 40 lanes in a suburb? If I don't need binoculars to see my neighbors across the street then the road isn't big enough for the insane throughput that a residential suburb produces. MOAR LANE
Get Genshin NOW on Xbox Series X|S, Game Pass, or PC/Mobile and grab the free goodies: hoyo.link/cLQlFJAL
Pogging out of my mind at this.
Ew no thanks
GET THAT BAG VALE LETS GO
did you design the aquabuses in fountaine? It seems like an valefisk-approved infrastructure system.
I'd rather not get put on the child predator list
Most Urban Planners Quit When They Are Just One More Lane From Fixing Traffic
Why use buses or trains, you ask, when you could just add... ONE. MORE. LANE!
I thought Lynx was the gambler
Frff
POV American traffic engineers
3 actually. Bike lane, emergency/public lane and truck bypass lane.
"If a car touches the roundabout the game crashes." This is an accurate representation of American drivers when faced with roundabouts.
whats funny is GPS's a majority of the time, for highway roundabouts, will just send you CONSTANTLY going around them, until you make an executive decision to figure shit out yourself.
My source is us... me and my brother... he was the driver, and I was staring at the GPS baffled... it then, told us to take a road... *and then turn fucking back around to the god damn roundabout...*
@@Laughing_Dragon >a majority of the time
I have literally never encountered that, nor have i ever heard that from a single other person. Kinda sounds like a specific location/GPS issue
I've been in an American roundabout and I can confirm the universe exploded
@@declanbennett1085 well I'm sure for YOU it was that way, and for many others, but any time I've talked about roundabouts with family, friends, or coworkers, a few times people who were customers at the store I work at, people get a bit of a stare, and comment on it lol.
True, although I’ve been driving roundabouts since forever. They’ve always been a thing in my town, but still people do not understand them.
Campaign for North Africa just a week away guys!!! Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week Just one more week
Omfg I'm so hyped
I am so happy about this information
tell valefisk to make a Campaign for North Africa video on April 1st and its just him twerking in monkee suit for 5 seconds OR for long enough to get midroll adds to bonus the insult
they've been playing campaign for north africa this whole time trust
@@cloner-st5vd 5 seconds of twerking on monke suit, 9:55 seconds of black screen
"Is that the WALL-E trash fields?"
"Oh, that's Central Park."
- Actual New York dialogue
I LOVE the 1 hour commute to my job that’s 5 min by foot
peak america
My commute is 40 minutes no traffic, 1hr20min with traffic, 11 hours by foot.
The American system can't be working as intended
@@charlesb-b993 damn Skippy if we aren't the best at everything to show you all what's up then the world would be boring!
Okay, but going on foot means having to go frogger across the street, is it worth the risk?
@@MorkandGork you're the best in everything except treating your citizens decently
One time on City Skylines 1, I had a pretty decent city, but the traffic was absolutely horrendous. I realized that, when downloading a bunch of car models, I had accidentally added an Amish horse and buggy. It had a max speed of 10mph.
That is absolutely amazing. The most realistic traffic sim I've ever heard of.
How does that even happen 😭
Pennsylvania traffic simulator
@@angelvu He got the "Pennsylvania Experience" model pack.
r/shityskylines is unironically my favourite subreddit
R*dditor
You have given me something to do for the next 2 hours. Thank you friend
Vale having to undo your fixes is just really funny to me😂
True
I want to see Vale's city with your fixes now
Can you believe it? Campaign for North Africa, just a lane away!
and Robert Moses wept, knowing he found his legacy continued
And Alexander wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer
and los angeles wept, knowing it had no more grass left to pave
And Paradox wept, knowing there were no more DLC to sell
Nah if this was Rob Moses' legacy there'd be more racism
Most obscure reference
Like it or not, this is what the true American Dream looks like.
rare justin y sighting 2024
its hims
Bro finally left ketamine rehab
The goat
Justin!! Haven't seen you around for a while, was wondering if you were still kickin!!! Good to see you're still with us man.
CNA just a week away!!!!
He can't keep getting away with this
Can you believe it guys?
@@gooper3644Yes🤑🤑🤑🤑
He just needs one more lane
Came here to comment the same thing jjsbgkfbe
You’ve finally replicated the pedestrian experience my grandparents had on their way to and from school.
What about the meter of snow, even in the summer?
Can't believe you got live footage of Toronto's 401 highway 30 years from now. Soon, all of Ontario will be a highway
And parkinglots.
@@raiderthe1 The two will not be meaningfully distinguishable
It would be a marked improvement.
I just loved driving 3h to get somewhere that would only have taken 1 by ttc(when it works and isn't being fixed)(which is never)
The Don Valley Parking lot my belovedn't
"B-But why not just use bus-"
**Gets shot**
-Big oil was here.
cause not that will actually fixed traffic.
Buses also use oil though
@@TheSkyGuy77 but they use way less oil per person
@blablabla798
They don't care how the oil is used, as long as someone is buying it.
@@TheSkyGuy77 but they're buying less
“If a car goes on the roundabout, the game will crash”
>Unpauses the game, I am immediately hit by an ad
youtube tries to put ads in transitions, so since the screen turned black there it gives an ad
Reminds me of that one driver's ed exam question that was a diagram of an interchange with "Who goes first?" and someone commented "Everyone all at once, but watch out"
I was so disappointed to learn that the so called 26 lane road was just 6 lanes in each direction with a set of lanes for high occupancy and access lanes. Thankfully Valefisk is here to bring the true 20 lane roads that America deserves.
E
"Next up: Air Pollution"
Just one more tree...
Next up: water
@@ThePlecoPalJust one more drop...
Next up: homelesness
@@whothefrickareyou8106Just one more tent…
Next up: oil
You need to get Not Just Bikes to review your city. Lets see what he has to say when he sees the solution to traffic.
you trying to give him a heart attack?
NJB found dead watching a cities skylines video
This comment is a hate crime
I want to see any urbanism channel watch this.
@@dialga4688 Like *@AdamSomething.*
Satisfactory taught me that i can fix any problem by just stacking more stuff vertically. So just build a second road above the first road and then build a third road above the second road and continue until the problem is fixed.
This one is dedicated to Berry. Fly high big man.
E
i was 100% not prepared for the Berry conspiracy
as an Edmontonian, the worlds largest parking lot is the most interesting part of this city
you forgot to mention the best part, that you still end up driving around looking for parking at wem
This is impressive Vale; you've almost matched the Chinese infrastructure planners when they created the 50-lane highway that merges into four lanes!
My favorite highway
I sadly learned that it's a four lane highway that splits into 25 toll booths. It's just that the toll booths were double stuffed due to holiday traffic. Houston's Katy Freeway still holds the claim for most deranged infrastructure planners... For now.
@@Quicksilvir Damn, there goes another internet misconception.
In that case:
This is impressive Vale; you’ve almost matched Houston infrastructure planners when they created the Katy Freeway in Texas!
@@Quicksilvir they'll for sure keep that title
@@Quicksilvir american patriots rejoice, for your country is still #1 in shitty infrastructure 🎉🎉
I don't know how, but Vale somehow managed to create some sort of urban planning eldritch horror.
It fills me with pride to see my home town mentioned in this video. Long live the West Edmonton Mall parking lot
It always socks me to remember we just have a massive mall in the middle of alberta
All hail WEM parking lot. That mall is surreal
these are genuinely amazing dystopian vibes. the lack of human centric approach, better=more, shades of gray everywhere. genuinely amazing
Most watchers quit one video away from when campaign to north africa releases
*one week away
4:41 Finally, a game where I can experience what it's like to live in the universe of Frogger!
Coming soon to an American city near you 😂
This comment is only funny if you think they are talking about the overwatch streamer Frogger
So I went to read the comments under that r/shittyskylines post, and the funniest joke of this entire video is how those guys are genuinely BEWILDERED by vale's city
Most of them seem to not even know who Vale is, which is comical
I gotta know the name of that post. Is it in the subreddit for the second one?
"how does i fix traffic i added more lane it dont go??"
@@andrewgreenberg1862
What I did was search up the subreddit r/shittyskylines, and looked at the top posts of the past month, and it was there
He's just on another level of shtposting
I used to have nightmares when i was a kid that looked just like this city. unironically reliving childhood trauma. thanks Vale.
I have been recently binging the game recently too. In my foolish European mindset i build a lot of public transport and still have traffic. Thank you for showing me the light of the blessed American Traffic Engineers.
0:30 *cries* ITS BEAUTIFUL.
I think Vale is the person who made the megastructure in "blame!".
the city WILL grow larger, human.
Vale is a Silicon Lifeform confirmed
the AI builders were trained on his Cities Skylines saves
1:12 I love how the bars come down like when you enter a new section in Halo CE
"Shut up and get behind me... Sir."
The line between visionary genius and deranged madman is a thin hard to define line, but you sir clearly walk the line like a tightrope.
He's using the line like a skipping rope.
@@lawlesslunkor he snorted it... probably how he comes up with these
43:19 - [Data is showing that people are dying more than usual. The reason might be an increase in road accidents.]
You made an ACTUAL Cyberpunk Dystopia, it's amazing.
central park looks like the dump outside of Night City
38:04 I think the ambulance driver just had a psychotic break.
hello everyone welcome to several hours of work- how many videos (playing the game/major speaking role/was shown in the initial names shot, not including the co-op horror video essay) have all of vale's friends been in, of the last 57 videos. i'm almost certain i missed some people though, so if you have corrections let me know
Vale- all 57 of them
Lynx- 30
chamber- 29
Solll- 28
Novel- 26
maivi- 25
aiden (candy)- 25
Teddy- 24
Dyno- 22
Pedejo- 12
Virtrial- 12
Jan- 10
Sylvia Temod- 9
Dom- 6
Wes- 6
rue- 5
Scutch- 4
sam- 2
Spiff- 2
What videos was spiff in
@@noa331One of them was the blind CSGO tournament
Pedejo has only been in 12 tied with Virtrial? i swear i hear his name like way more. also Jan has only been in 10? Man im all over the place
Wow! I can't believe Vale is in all of Vale's videos! He must be a great friend of Vale!
Can we get a Chamber only video?
the thing is, induced demand is a real thing up until you reach the point where every person who could conceivably use the road has their own dedicated lane!
2:20 Vale to Novel: "I'm undoing your fixes because they actually solve the problem, my content doesn't exist if it all works correctly."
I had to pause the video from laughing.
The “city” at 1:03 activated my Siri
Super impressive to scale model of Houston, Texas in City Skylines!
Being a motorcyclist on that 40 lane stroad that's backed up to hell must be terrifying.
Vale accepting a sponsor by Genshin is a sign he has finally gone insane
Him or Genshin?
@@natetwehues2428
Yes
Finally?
I'll wait until he gets sponsored by AFK arena
I love the Mines of Moria that definitely exist canonically in real life NYC
38:00 not gonna talk about how that ambulance swerved from nothing?
the dead patient reanimated, just an average occurrence in new york
@@Nothing-1w3The rats'll do that to ya
"It's like Colorado" I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW I ONLY WALK 7 MILES TO GET TO KING SOOPERS ALRIGHT
We don't need 15 minute cities we need 15 lane in each direction cities
15 minute accross the road cities.
Note: i mean 15 minutes walking no waiting included
most of the city is desert of concrete. the ideal human habitat.
This is what the USA seems like to us europeans
That's what Texas, California, and Florida are like
New Jersey? Not so much
@@TheSkyGuy77
New York and Jersey are also on that list mate
Rural NY and Jersey, not so much but that's where the only decent people in those states live
@commisaryarreck3974
I'm from semi rural New Jersey, and that's what I was referring to.
if you think about it, adding more lanes will actually eventually fix traffic.
eventually the cityscape will be so hellish no one would be able to live there nor associate with it unless they were trying to just pass through, turning the entirety of the globe into one big freeway where everyone crashes the human race into extinction and leaves behind a trafficless oblivion.
"Let's keep adding lanes. That'll fix the traffic problem!" I didn't know Valefisk worked for the Texas Department of Transportation
I am not gonna lie, during the ad read for Genshin Impact, I thought you were gonna say we can now stream it directly into our brains with your patented ApeLink™ technology.
the title card and the concept itself feels like a NotJustBikes April Fools' special, love it
i like how its 48 minutes satire on inefficient transportation and 2 minutes of a dogmeat conspiracy
90% of Valefisks add one more lane before realising the Campaign for North Africa
11:15 No way the one time a youtuber mentions my home town its cause of a damn parking lot 💀
as a Midwesterner I can confirm that this is what Houston looks like
For Houston it actually kinda works and traffic isn't as egregious as metropolitan areas can be but we will eventually start feeling it once the other half of california/new york's population finishes moving here.
jokes on vale, this is just an average day in atlanta, except these roads dont have potholes
11:34 Central Parking
Lol 😂😂😂
My father is a civil engineer. Designs roads, bridges, and you guessed it, highways.
A few months ago I decided to ask him how work has been-- It's not something I inquire about much, and I was curious. So imagine my disbelief when he starts talking about how he recently went to a meeting where there was discussion of one of the other divisions in the company being tasked to add another lane onto one of those massive Texas highways.
To say I popped off would be an understatement, because this meme has lived-rent free in my head for YEARS. Then I had to explain to my (reasonably) confused father why I was so excited about a new development for a highway in a state I have never been to, hahaha.
truly a texas dream
Simulation of us commuting to North Africa for a special little campaign that might be happening next week
A Genshin impact sponsorship AND a certified Chinese urban engineering classic? I didn't know Vale has pledged his alliance to the illustrious People's Republic of China
I for one welcome our Asian overlords
This is like a perpetual motion machine: every time you think you’ve got it, you need just one more gear
2 patreon posts in one day the rats are eating well today
>"New York" but halfway unreadable due to random lines
Seems accurate, with random tags and stickers all over the street signs
On that new jersey turnpike grindset
the fact this was built before the city was even populated makes it much more realistic
I feel like there’s not enough lanes still I can see grass and buildings in a one mile radius.
The fucking Allmost Meat dog conspiracy was the funniest shit considering that that was purely just the game being broken so much and the fact that it's just an actual normal asset in the game.
One day those fuckers at Damien Bite will be brought to justice for what they did to Berry and Ace.
The Italians needed just one more lane to win in Campaign for north Africa
I auto played to this video and went, “there’s only one man who is insane enough to do this”. Absolute legend
All these dogs remind me of a game called "Dog's Life" for PS2 where you play as a dog & eventually discover that an evil woman is turning dogs into processed cat food in an evil dissecting factory
Best part about shopping at West Edmonton Mall is not being able to find a GOD DAMNED PARKING SPOT! It's a nightmare every time.
A whole new meaning to "I can't make it to work today" when it literally takes you more than a day to get to commute to work.
Man, Spiff AND Vale uploading on the same day? It must be some kind- Oh, they have the same sponsor, that makes more sense.
Cna, just a January away!
As he stood witness to the beauty that Vale had created, he despaired for he knew he could never recreate such magesty, such beauty, such magnificence.
At this point Vale, your city is going to gain sentience and become an Eldritch abomination
I mean you're right, but you have to add another lane to the exit lane. and that means an exit lane for your exit lane. which needs an exit lane to your destination. but one lane isn't enough, you have to have at LEAST two, but two must eventually turn to one so you need an exit for your exit for your exit for your destination!
Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex Simulator 2024
Only 40 lanes in a suburb?
If I don't need binoculars to see my neighbors across the street then the road isn't big enough for the insane throughput that a residential suburb produces. MOAR LANE
Valefisk: Tries to create a disaster in CS2
Result: Most pedestrian friendly american city
"Welcome to the Megapolis of Stroad City, also known as 'The Divine Blindspot', because if they could see it, no god would allow it to exist."
28:12 “Houston was right”😭
most highways give up one lane before the traffic is good
Vale's bringing out all of his American gene's to make this thing.
I love how much of a menace to society Vale is, and I cannot tell you how glad I am that it isn't MY society.
Caravan people are truly thinking ahead - they'll know they will be sleeping in the traffic, might as well be somewhat comfy.
right now my local interstates adding a new lane :) theyre gonna fix the dozens of deaths on that road every year, im sure it wont backfire :)
There was an ambulance driving by my house and I didn't notice until I paused the video
Until Vale revealed that this is a City Skylines 2 video, I thought I was watching a montage of an american highway
I'm not addicted to lane bro, I can quit anytime I want
just please one more lane bro come on
Edmonton shoutout is crazy, we never get anything up here lol
except apparently a 30k spot parking lot lmao, which does track because I swear I can never find my car at west ed
Can you believe it guys? CNA! JUST TWO MONTHS AWAY! WOW!
51 seconds of not hearing vale speak, truly a good valefisk video
I didn't know north africa looked like this, thx 4 sharing 🤗🤗🤗