I gotta say, as someone who is 29 and doesn't use TikTok, look at the people around IN REAL LIFE. Nobody looks perfect. Everyone looks normal. You're fine.
Unfortunately the brain can’t distinguish between a digital and a real person. What we consider attractive is literally just an average of all the people we’ve seen, Our brains then benchmark us against that average. Spending time in the real world around real people is the most valuable advice you can give anybody!
exactly, like i often see beautiful "perfect" people online but they kinda seem unreal to me? in a way that it's unrealistic to look that way all the time. like im convinced that many people just need to go outside, to look at how everyone looks irl and appreciate the beauty of "imperfections"
I'm tired of being told what's wrong with me whether it's my face, my skin color, my body type, my hair type, my race, how I move, how I talk, etc. I'm tired!
same here and I have heard what was wrong with me my whole life , long before all this be perfect sh*t was everywhere , ppl should stop trying to reach any state of perfection cos "no state of perfection exists", what beauty is or isn't is all just opinion on what a majority find attractive and since it's constantly changing and is different everywhere in the world I gave up long time ago on trying to be how ppl wanted me to be or look a certain way cos you know what what happens if you get plastic surgery , lipo , fillers etc trying to fit into this beauty standard for it to again change and after all that money spent and energy wasted you find you no longer fit into the beauty standard you worked so hard to achieve ?, we should make a new standard take care of yourself , be your own version of beauty as long as your healthy keep yourself clean (personal care and hygiene ); then all that matters beauty trends last no longer than beauty it's self , trends change and bodies change so who cares life too short to worry about it all for nothing in the end anyway .
I blame the media. We have no middle age or older women shown living their best life, kicking ass, shown as aspirational, being it in tv, movies, or popular stories. Meanwhile, Tom Cruz, The Rock, Bruce Willis etc... keep making movies, impressing audiences, and aging. We need to change the narrative and representation.
I want movies with main female characters Tom Cruise's age so badly. Just being badass and awesome. Not sexualized, not "she's middle aged but so young looking," not the makeup artists on set trying to make her appear younger, not pining for her youth, no one criticizing her for being old. I want women to exist, live, and be happy. There's a huge market for normal women in movies, but Hollywood will never do it because they don't respect women.
I'm a 2x cancer survivor in my early 30s, and I promise you, aging is a privilege denied to many. I do my best to take care of myself, but I still have visible signs of age (gray hairs, a few small lines), and they make me happy because eighteen years ago when I was sick for the first time, I wasn't sure I'd make it this far. Life is too short for anti-aging straws.
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: for every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. Matthew 7:7-8 KJV I hope you have a good day, know that JESUS died for you and loves you so very much!
But also if you think about the time Picasso was born there wasn’t modern makeup how we have to now, no skin treatments like now no technology, anti wrinkle cream or any of that stuff now. Also the environment was more dirty, more diseases spread faster. Times have changed. Nowadays people peak at like 25 with all the new technology we have. We shouldn’t be listening to such old people who aren’t even alive right now. This is 2023.
As an older millennial, reading a 21 year old say she feels so relieved to see older women talk about being childfree & happy bc she thought she was convinced she was about to hit the wall at 23 & so many early 20 year olds having the same fear. Y’all wtf??
I’m 21 and I’m already trying to prevent my non existent wrinkles! The pressure is real😢. Anti aging rhetoric is definitely affecting me and it’s so sad, why do I feel old already?
I’m 23 and even though I try to stay positive about myself and taking longer to complete college, when a lot people in my class find out my age I’m automatically judged and questioned because I “should have graduated already” (I’ll be graduating next year, while everyone else I knew who graduated hs with me has already graduated college). It’s really hard not to feel like a failure and sometimes I do feel like that, but can pull myself back together.
@@Onigiriedits I’m 24 and I’m in the same boat. I’ll graduate a few months short of my 25th bday. So many people are having the same experience. My brother just got his first degree at 28 and I felt nothing but pride. Take your time people, don’t feel ashamed about it ❤️
@@Onigiriedits You have all the time in the world! I finished my BA at 24, I'm now 30 with an amazing (six figure) job, I'm halfway through my Master's (part-time), and have a cute little house with my husband and our 3 dogs. Life just keeps getting better, trust me. You'll be more than okay! 💕
Aging is a privilege. I knew friends who passed when one was 18, and the other 21. They unfortunately won’t be able to grow up and experience long life like the most of us. Even a few centuries ago, the life expectancy was 30/40. Enjoy every year you get, and be thankful for all the time you have💙
Love this and sorry to hear of the loss of your friends 💕😊🌸. One random pop fact I like remembering about a few centuries ago is that we currently live better than old-school royalty, After all, I don’t need to sleep beside a rotting carcass so that the fleas can jump off me and onto that instead 😂, Kind of makes me value the life I live now
i feel like it’s so hard to match the beauty standard. Kids feel pressured to look 16 at 12. then adults feel pressured to look 20 at 35. we just need to let people age naturally
I wish women over 30 didn't just disappear to the world at large though. Women go from being literally hunted in the streets to being told we're "entitled" for asking why our McDonalds order was never made.
It's literally just a bunch of sexism, there's a reason you rarely see any over 30 models. Society, and not just the internet, acts like you've passed your prime and COMPANIES take advantage of this. Just like always, everyone eats it up too. Hell, just to enter a beauty pageant like Miss Universe you're literally not allowed to enter if you're over 27! AND you can't be married or divorced either, can you believe that?!? So f-cking stupid. There's also a reason why rarely any media you consume, like movies, doesn't have plotlines of young adult/adult characters who are aged like adults (not adults acting as highschoolers). It's genuinely my BIGGEST pet peeve of all.
Kids at 16 don’t want to look 12 are you fr😂😂 when you’re a kid you want to look older when you’re an adult you want to look younger.. these 20 yr olds wanting to stay looking 19 are bizarre as hell tho gotta admit that
A lot of these issues wouldn’t exist if people just stopped caring what 17 year olds think about beauty standards. I’m 25, idc what a 17 year old thinks about my face or body. Go in the real world baby
Fr!! I worked at Starbucks since I was 17, left when I was 23. Those last few months a lot of 17-18 year olds were hired and most had that mentality that 30=old and expired. It was so frustrating. I was that age not too long ago and I feel like I did not have that mentality at all
@@jules5006 "Old and expired"...that's awful. I mean, the fear of aging isn't anything new, but it's disturbing how the goal post of what is considered "old" keeps getting younger and younger. When I was 18/19 I used to work in retail and my favorite people were my coworkers in their late 20s - 30s, and I never viewed them as "old". They were great, super funny with vibrant personalities, and I loved asking for their advice on things. Now that I'm in my 30s, I don't get that feeling at all from Gen Z. It seems like to younger people, anyone over 30 is worthless or something.
As someone who is officially middle-aged, I think it's not healthy to obsess about how well you'll age. There's no point. You can have romantic and career success without being the hot young thing. It's never a bad idea to eat mostly healthy, exercise, avoid alcohol, and wear sunscreen, though. Also, my youth in reality was not fun for the most part; I'm too busy having fun now to create a fake online persona like the young'uns🦆
Right? Getting older and knowing yourself better, feeling wiser and experienced enough to know what you want and what you don’t want (emotional maturity) is actually totally underrated. Youth these days are excessively ageist, which wasn’t as common during my youth as I remember it. Just seems very shallow & I think they may need psychological help! The last 20 years of popular media was pretty yikes! 🙈💩😵💫 praying for them. 🙇🏼♀️
yes! as a 19 year old girl i do try to wear sunscreen, eat healthy, have an active lifestyle, and avoid alcohol because i know that those things are good for me. a lot of beauty sickness has infected me though so i deleted instagram and tiktok to avoid that mess.
It’s crazy how society thinks and acts like when a woman hits 25 she starts decaying or something… 30 years old?? a relict. It’s the saddest thing ever and deeply rooted in misogyny. I’m 19 years old and I already caught myself checking the mirror for wrinkles! It’s insane and I’m working on not feeling so self conscious about getting old and having imperfections because honestly, it’s SO exhausting
Hey girl don’t worry, I barely saw my first “fine line” smile line one one side because I smile a lot at 28 y/o turning 29 next month. I’ve had this line for about 1 month and honestly I’m starting to accept it more and more each day. I don’t want to feel like I need to stop smiling just to not get lines on my face. Or that I need plastic surgery or Botox every few months to avoid the effects of aging. Think of your parents or anyone older that you love and admire. Do their wrinkles make you love them any less? Not in my case. I love my parents more and more each day. Any way I hope this helps you feel better ❤
Honestly - when i was around 18-24, I was up to my neck in researching different beauty methods that I wanted to get done as I saw signs of aging, I had an entire plan made (but no money at that point). Now that I'm 30, I really only want to keep all of the 'imperfections' - my fine lines give my face character and the few grey hairs that I have mean that people take me more seriously. My sister got botox and neither of us liked how it looked. I'm glad i didn't get anything done when I was younger, because i think there comes a point where it's difficult to stop the 'routine' (and I'm not saying i won't get something done in like 15 years, but who knows), but I can honestly say, at my age (that I'm honestly excited for) i have so many better things to care about than my wrinkles :) So what I'm trying to say is - enjoy your youth, but maybe, like with me, this obsession will just go away on its own ;)
Honestly a lot of aging is out of your control. You can use certain skincare products and generally look after your health, but the reality is you might not like the way you age. As a 30 year old who looks older than her age, the best advice I can give you is to learn how to submit to the fact that you will age, you don't have control over it, and you might not always like it along the way. Just try to accept yourself the way you are and recognize that how others perceive you is not within your control. Focus on your strengths, your personality, and building your character. ♥️
@RedhairedBallerina I have the "routine" I'm 31. Started at around 27. I can't stop and it's no longer enough. I wish I never started. But things started to change, I was ina toxic relationship and I panicked and thought this would fix things. I ended up with an eating disorder too.
I turned 43 this year, and I'm here to tell y'all that aging is awesome! Two of my friends died in their late 30s (COVID and a heart attack, respectively), so when I say life is fleeting, I mean it. Eat the chocolate cake, take the trip, ask the crush out, wear sunscreen. If you do those things, the rest will inevitably take care of itself.
I'm sorry for your losses. I've had Covid too and struggled for months after that with respiratory problems. It was incredibly scary, so I'm cherishing my life and now really try to live it to the fullest.
Yes, and yes. We're not saying not to take care of yourself, just to enjoy your life. We're going to die eventually, no matter if we never eat the Key Lime Pie or do all the other things. Self care is important, but part of self care is treating yourself from time to time. Everything in moderation. ❤
For real. Aint got time to worry about other people who see my wrinkle for one second and consider me a lesser human being for it. If that's how they see me, I don't want them in my life. Life is difficult enough already, worrying if I don't look like I just got out of the womb is my last concern when I'm focused on having my basic needs met, a house, a bed, food and financial security. Who cares about smooth skin when you're homeless.
Yep I'm 37, practically elderly by TikTok standards and yet I feel and look the best I ever have. Look after yourself, enjoy life and be kind to everyone. Bring others up around you and you will be happy and adored.
as someone who’s 33 it literally sucks to feel like you’re expected to look 20 forever, the whole “omg 40 is the new 20!” “You can still look hot and sexy at 50!” Like ok cool but when can we rest?! It’s out of control, I’m all for acting “young” as you age but feeling like we have to stay “hot and sexy” forever is really damaging, the millennials are the first generation who’s really feeling it
Exactly! That's how I feel I'm 28 going on to 29 and this is exactly how I feel too I welcome and accept aging because it's indeed a beautiful gift that many don't have sadly 😔
You are not the first generation to feel it. You are the first to vocalize it. As a middle aged lady, I appreciate you calling BS rather than suffer in silence.
46 genX here. Honestly it gets better as you get older. I used to be so fixated on my makeup and style but my happiest times were never when I looked great, they were when I was having FUN.
AGING IS A PRIVILEGE DENIED TO MANY Watching BOTH parents fight cancer while still growing up ( only a few years apart) myself has really illuminated what is truly important in life. Not a day goes by that I don't grieve my father but feel gratitude for everyday I have here on earth with my mom. Last year I lost my best friend to a freak accident. He wasn't even 30. You can spend incredible amounts of money on the last and greatest creams, serums, cosmetics and procedures but none of that really means anything if you get into a car crash tomorrow. It won't matter how much time you spend obsessing over your skin texture and side profile when you are in the er covered in burns,fighting for your life... And that's if you are lucky and survive. What will matter how you spend the time you do have here and the way you choose to treat others and conduct yourself.
This! And the small group of Gen Z that seems obsessed with mocking people of prior generations (ESPECIALLY WOMEN) for literally just existing in a way that is different from them. It's so weird and ageist, like do they realize that they will inevitably age themselves (unless die die young I guess) ?
The "woke" in general don't care about those groups because they aren't trendy causes like anti-racism, feminism and LGBT rights. So much of civil rights is purely performative, sadly.
Millennial here! I'll start by saying, I lost my sister a decade ago. I was 21, she was 23 going on 24 and randomly passed in a car accident. That moment changed my entire outlook on life. Making it to another year is a blessing and aging is something we should all strive for. When I turned thirty I was scared it might hurt lol, but I was proud to be the one who made it to the thirty club for both of us (She's always with me) I do get the pressure of social media but comparison is the thief of joy and time is an illusion! My grandma is 77 and she always says " Your only as old as you feel." Live like this and no one can ever take your youth.. That's the best anti-aging advice I got.
Life gets good in your 30s. It gets better in 40s. Those are the decades where you usually have more money and more confidence with what you like, but are still active enough to do many things. All these people who think life peaks in your 20s...it's literally the worst, most insecure decade.
Turning 31 this year and I have never felt more content and happy with myself. Then again I had a mental breakdown in High school, suffered from severe anxiety and depression...so I reversed. 😅 So I can't imagine what my nieces and nephews feel in this current environment. It seems judgment is even harsher than before.
Hey 94’ baby here (30 next year). I’m so excited for my 30’s. I think it’ll be the best decade since I also experienced a lot of issues in my childhood and teen years. I still deal with my depression and anxiety but it feels like as an adult, I can enjoy my life a lot more. I hope the generations now and after us realize aging is inevitable and beautiful! Wrinkles tell stories and our personalities are truly what make us shine. Cheesy I know but it’s so true
As a late millennial, I realize over and over again what a blessing it was to grow up without “real” social media (we had MySpace and then Facebook in HS, but it was a very different vibe). I refuse to download TikTok because I know it will destroy my mental health/self esteem.
Yep. We are the last generation that will remember a time before the internet and was there for the beginning the internet. Now everyone is a digital native
Same! I’m not gonna disclose my age group on the internet, but I’m pretty young and I also refuse to download TikTok! Almost everyone in my grade has been ruined because of social media, especially my bff. One time I was singing toxic and she said “You said you don’t have TikTok, but that’s a TikTok song!” Like, honestly, even if we weren’t really listening to music like that when we were little you just know that it’s a old song by the mv and how it sounds! That story doesn’t really have anything to do with what this video is talking about but I just wanted to share that as an example of how bad TikTok is.😅
I’m 31 and went back to undergrad (wrapping up my last few semesters). Being around the gen z has been one of the most difficult things I’ve been through. There’s a sharp boundary drawn between those who are “instagrammable” and not. I thought conformity was crazy when I was in hs but I’ve never seen anything like this. Guys have more liberty overall because with girls it’s all 100% sad beige, Stanley, same clothing… all of it
I genuinely don’t understand how more women aren’t anti plastic surgery. Men for the most part aren’t running out to go under the knife or get needles shoved in their faces. Women say « I’m doing it for myself! » but I really don’t agree as long as the pressure for women to be perfect like this exists.
100% agree with you! It seems like a faux pas to say this because we're supposed to be accepting of "personal" choices. But we need to be looking at the bigger picture. As you said, it's mainly women getting this "work" done, and they're getting this done because they are insecure... because of beauty standards and obsession with women's youth. Also, interestingly it is mainly men performing these surgeries on women. So, I mean there's nothing "empowering" about that.
As a 28 year old woman, I will say, having never downloaded TikTok, I don't resonate with all these hyper real trends and their turnover rate. If you're depressed over your looks then maybe get off TikTok and see what happens.
Same. I have Facebook just to keep my older relatives up to date on the big milestones going on and Instagram to keep tabs on high school friends, but I've stayed off any other social media. I've always been rather confident with my looks. The only time I ever felt insecure was when I was pregnant, but that's a whole other can of worms
@@fuosdi64it's NOT the tiktok's fault. You sound like the boomers with their war on drugs "Drugs bad😡" while people with functioning brains were deliberately choosing drugs. Same thing here. Many humans are shallow and will remain like that for the rest of their lives. Can't blame the tool for making them this way. Take responsibility for who you are instead of pretending that a freaking app made you a certain way.
As someone who is 27 and around a lot of people in their early 20’s I get told I’m old pretty often “omg your so old, hahaha” girl I’m not old. If my live in ended when I turned 25 then it would have been tragic. I love getting older it’s such a blessing
Only literal 7 year olds think 40-50 is old because time is incomprehensible to them. And those little children don't even think 27 is old... How tf could anyone think 27 is old.
On the topic of feeling too late to achieve your dream. My mom always wanted to be a nurse and only recently went back to college for it. She’s in her 50s, graduating nursing school this year, and already has a part time job at the hospital. It really is never too late
Congrats to her! I just turned 41 and graduated last month as an EMT. My oldest daughter and I took the class together, she's 22 and nobody believed I was her mom. Aging is fun and it's def never too late to do what you want to do, and if you wanna change your mind halfway through that's ok too
Most successful CEOs did not achieve success until after the average age of retirement. It was also not based on a revolutionary product, but by doing the same thing they had been doing for the prior decades of work with a minor tweak to improve performance/productivity/price etc...I find it’s really good to remember that just because something is trending through the media ( lol such as people under 30 who are billionaires) doesn’t mean that even a closely resembles reality
@@lunar686 I think we can all agree that "success" is relative though, and the majority of those people under 30 with mega millions didn't start from nothing like the average person does
as someone that just turned 25 and is feeling the panicky crisis of the clock (even though 25 is objectively NOT EVEN OLD...ugh so frustrating) This video is really encouraging to me. My 74 year old grandma laughs and she's like, "you don't know what old is." and I feel dumb for feeling the pressure, but we definitely did grow up in different worlds for sure.
I'm also 25 and I've been having aging/existential crises since I was 16. At some point you realize the only way you'll feel better about it is by leading a fulfilling, healthy life (to the best of your ability). If you're satisfied with yourself and the choices you make, there is nothing to be scared of or worried about.
i’m a film major and i'm aware i’m going into an industry based on mentorship and climbing up the ranks so i've learned to be ok with not making it big until i'm at least 30. i wish more people realized that the average human lives to be 80 and deserve to find joy in more than just the first 15-21 years of that lifespan
This! Your life doesn’t end at your early 30s. If you’re not married by your late 20s then it’s okay, your looks don’t suddenly falter the minute you turn 30. Sentiments like that is rooted in misogyny anyway. Enjoy your life.
Well let's just say that Gen Z doesn't have much time before they find out the truth....😂 Literally another decade and Gen Z will become "old" according to their own standards. I doubt any of them will stop living after that. Every human generation will grow and come to terms with what life is. I know that Gen Z seems crazy but it's just a phase, like any other youth phase in the previous generations. It'll pass too unless a certain madman doesn't decide to nuke us all.
I can’t emphasize enough how many good things are waiting for you in your thirties as a woman. Do not settle in your 20s to keep up with the timeline, trust your gut and make your way through the anxiety and self doubt of your 20s and in your 30s you’ll really feel the riches. It really pays off to take your time growing up and developing yourself beyond materialistic and societally expected milestones.
That "Can we just exist?!" really stuck with me. It is so true, so powerful, so sad to even be in question. Thank you for all you do. Life is exhausting, but at least we are not alone in this.
I’m 24 and having all of this shoved into my face has definitely had a big part in my depression and self-hatred. I’ve slowly cut down on social media and purposely changed my algorithm to focus on cute animal videos or anything that’s not related to beauty. Although I still get these beauty TikToks, I just learned to scroll past it. I’ve seen a huge difference in my mental health since doing that. If it’s affecting me this much, I can only imagine the damage it’s done to young, impresionable teens
I remember when I was 18-22, I hated being mistaken for being younger looking 15-17, and having so many older guys try to prey on me. 😬 It was so uncomfortable and I did not like being infantilized. Especially after I turned 21, it was very frustrating to not be taken seriously because I was just a cute wittle girl. Now that trying to look as young as a child is a beauty standard, that is so concerning 😢😢😢 EDIT: Holy smokes. Thank you for the replies all. I hear you. I see you. All of you are valid. And thank you for sharing your replies and making me feel a bit more validated as well.
I feel that, Im 33 right now but when I was in my early 20s older men used to approach me all the time then often tell me I looked like a high schooler especially when I had braces, looking back at that really grosses me out now, its really disturbing it's considered a flex for women in their 20s to pass as teenagers
It sounds weird but I feel like the fact that I struggled with severe acne from age 13 to 24 made me less susceptible to these over the top beauty trends and standards. I hit self-esteem rock-bottom HARD during my teen years, never leaving the house without three layers of foundation, feeling like everyone was constantly staring at me, and crying myself to sleep regularly. Eventually by 19, when I had tried every fix out there to no avail, I finally had to reconcile with the fact that I had no control over my skin's appearance. All I could control was whether I let it run my life or not. And that's what got me on the skin neutrality/ skin acceptance train. Years later, I have definitely noticed my grays coming in, fine lines and wrinkles, and other body changes, but it surprisingly doesn't bother me that much. And I laugh when I hear about hyperminute things like "erase your visible pores" because having clear skin with the slight caveat of noticeable pores sounds like my teenage dream and the fact that folks are aiming for Barbie plastic-level complexions is so absurd. I guess what I'm saying is I think there's a lot of benefits you can get from pursuing body neutrality on some level. What helped for me originally was purposely looking in mirrors less, challenging myself to go outside and do my regular activities without makeup on to see if anyone would actually treat me any different (they didn't), pouring myself into new hobbies and skills that made me feel proud and confident, and spending more time in nature to observe the beautiful oddities, assymetries, and imperfections found in plants, animals, and land formations. Seriously! Sometimes all you need is a little perspective. Hoping for the best for all Gen z and anyone else who is being victimized by these standards. 🦆
Literally always had the hourglass shape, a big butt was NOT a good thing when I was in highschool and neither was curly hair. Well when BBLs got popular people asked me about my figure how I got it? Now its phasing back out again and I’m still the same still bigger and taller than most women whether its in or not 😂
I love Salem’s videos and I’m in my late 30’s. I just wanted to say to all you young people life can be SO AWESOME getting older! My 30’s were overall my favorite decade. And in my opinion 30 isn’t that old like I’ve got 50+ years left, it’s all about your outlook on life ✌️
I’m turning 30 next year and I’ve been saying to myself that it’ll be the best decade! I had a rough childhood and bad teens years, my 20’s was me mostly waiting to move in with my partner after 8 years long distance. Now we live together and I can’t wait for my 30’s!! I wish you the best and hope your 40’s will be healthy and incredible too ❤
I love getting older. Makes me think of Monica's quote from the tv series friends: I dont get older, I get better!" She was reffering to her coocking skills, but it's a fantastic quote nontheless. I love it 😁 Currently 25 years old, and life gets better, not because I have it easier, but I handle things differently. I see myself becoming a better person according to my own standard 😄
@@slychicken661 I love getting older too and that’s the perfect quote. I think I appreciate things more now and are way more grateful for experiences or even small blessings throughout my day. You find more joy and peace as you get older and stop worrying so much about what people think of you.
my close friend and i are 28. she expressed her desire to wear sexier, more revealing clothes but she can’t because she thinks only people in their early 20s can. i told her that she made up this standard and she can wear whatever she feels comfortable in!
From what I understand, women peak in their 40s and 50s! All of the women I have the privilege of knowing have all reached the final forms of who they are during that time and have this power about them. There’s an sense of self-assurance, confidence and strength we’re all building up to that hits right around then. At least from what I’ve personally witnessed. I’ll bet your 40s and on will rock! ❤
Deleting TikTok has been a blessing. I’m 20 and have been feeling the pressure of looking young. But getting rid of that app took so much stress away. I’m care free, enjoying the way I look, and learning not to care. I feel older than 20 sometimes bc I cannot resonate with these younger people
Girl you are 20 you do not have to look younger than you probably look. I hate this obsession and romanticizing of teenagers that is put in front of our faces everyday on apps and movies😒I do not mean it that I criticize you it is problem of our society. And another terrible outcome is when you are teen and adult man are after you you think it is normal because pop culture groomed you basically to it😭😭sorry for my rant 😂😂
Just turned 21 and I used to feel some legit unhappiness noticing smile lines and under eye wrinkles coming it. That was even without ever having used TikTok. You’re seeing your behind the scenes 24/7 but only most other people’s highlight reels. It really does make such a difference to look at REAL people and notice how little you care to notice lines or “sagging” on their face. You just see a face, their eyes, their smile.
@@joycor1419Thing about wrinkles is that you have smile lines because you are smiling so much! Isn’t that absolutely beautiful? I know some celebrities say they try not to move their face to avoid lines. Imagine forcign yourself not to smile, not to express happiness for WHAT?!?! Every wrinkle, line, pore tells a story. Don’t dull yourselves and prevent life fron happening for some toxic, vapid, empty and meaningless stuff such as beauty standards (That change every week).
@@dianaselnekovicova948 im 13 and ive been insecure about myself because i feel like my time will run out and ill be unattractive and stuff like that its really hard but idk how to stop worrying
@@astrobeth do not worry you have plenty of time before you😄 and lot of time attractive people are because of their healthy attitude towards yourself. And all of them has something like wrinkles, saggy eyes, acne. Look at someone you think is attractive (in real world) and look carefully at their face their are not perfect too but still beautiful
At 25 years old, I definitely beat myself down for feeling like I haven't succeeded because I don't have excessive money or a house, let alone a job at the moment. Thank you for the gentle reminder that just doing what you love is what makes you most successful. Although I haven't obtained these ridiculous goals that I've formed from society's standards, I'm still succeeding because I've got my beautiful family, gorgeous plant-filled apartment, amazing friends, and so many hobbies that I can never get bored. I'm living the life that I've wanted since I was a kid. I just don't have it all yet. And that's okay.
Hello 👋🏾 Same. I’m 26 and we have so much more in store for us. Life doesn’t begin/end at any age. It’s a beautiful journey with no destination in mind 🤍
You don’t have to have a house. If anything it’s a blessing. Think about it: taking on immense debt for 30 years paying a mortgage while not even really owning your home. You don’t actually “own” your home while you pay a mortgage cuz the bank still owns it til you pay off your mortgage. When you finish paying your mortgage, yes the deed of the home will be in your name, but if you fail to pay property taxes, they can still take your home from you. So you don’t really OWN it if you got those taxes hanging over your head. This goes for countries that do have property taxes. Others that don’t, like the Gulf countries, Malta, Luxembourg, etc., you do own after paying it off. Not to mention, you feel tied down to one place while you pay off your mortgage. I like feeling free and having the freedom to move whenever I feel like it without worrying about selling a home first or “who will manage my property while I live in xyz”.
Dang. So people constantly be like: smile! And others be like: But no, don't make wrinkles, don't smile. I guess I just smile outta my bumhole 😂 I have resting B face anyway.
Speaking as an artist, There are a lot of insecurities that I believe are absolutely beautiful. Hip dips? The feeling of sketching those in after finishing rough anatomy is wonderful. Different types of foreheads and noses? Each and every one of them I have drawn, literally none are unattractive I think people forget a lot that beauty doesn’t have a single mold. Looking at the world around us we compliment the beauty of forests and beaches, they are beautiful in their own right but still belong to the same world. Each flower is different but everyone has their own favorite It sounds super corny but in the end I just kind of see things that way, and I think it’s important that we recognize beauty not only as one mold, but for all the little ways it sneaks into our lives
As a 38 year old woman I will say that I actually feel far more content with my looks now than I ever did when in my teens or 20s…and there’s something about being young that makes you feel inadequate. We all fear aging to a degree, but I do think that the next generation’s toxic obsession with infinite youth is mostly a result of aggressive (and often disguised) marketing seamlessly integrated into the fake world of social media. There is a huge industry out there making massive profits off of people’s natural insecurities. If an ad (or any video) makes you feel even more insecure than you previously did about something, it’s good to take note of this toxic tactic and decide whether you want to feed into that or not. And aging is not all bad…we generally become confident and comfortable with themselves over time and give less of a damn about what other people think of us. We become less willing to be pawns of industries who want us to feel bad about ourselves...which is probably why most ads for anti-aging seem to target such a young audience.
I agree it definitely gets greater later and I'm also 38. My twenties was nothing but struggle and I have way more confidence than I did back then so I wouldn't go back to my twenties
Thank you so much for making this! This need to maintain youth is exhausting and I just want to age in peace. I had a 16 year old tell me I was old because I told her I was 25. 25! I never used to think 25 was old but I really had a kid tell me I was old. It made me feel … bad and horrible and I almost thought something was wrong with me for aging. But aging is beautiful and we shouldn’t be afraid of it at all. 😊
Oh lord, I feel you! Since I've transferred to another uni, my 2001/2002 colleagues gasp whenever I say I'm 25 and the inevitable "YOU DON'T LOOK 25!!!" follows. How are we supposed to look like??? WE ARE YOUNG TOO!
I feel this bc I'm turning 25 at the end of the month and I feel old. I've literally been dreading turning 25 for years now and 25 is technically still very young!!!
@@emilynam6084 Exactly! And 25 is not old. Hell, even 30 is not old! So don’t let the socials pressure you into thinking that it is because you are not old until you feel old. You are as young as you feel like you are!
I feel sorry for Gen-z. Seeing them buy more anti-aging products than me, who was born in 1965. Like you said I was concerned about aging when I was young but not about looks but about being able to enjoy life being silly and having fun without having to become a cog in the corporate world. 🦆
@@melissam597 One unfortunate benefit is that we grow out of the corporate nightmare quickly once we realize what's going on. I used to collect products.. Now I quite literally only do what I feel like and can spot a "#ad" a mile away. I laugh at the new products to fix nonexistent insecurities now. It's so blatantly obvious that it's not useful, so they have to use psychological manipulation to sell. And now that we've grown up with psych ads, we can spot ANY psych ads. It sucks but gives us some superpowers, y'know?
I agree here, this anti aging stuff is so out of hand. I'm only 17, and I already feel like I'm running out of time. For me, all it does is make me feel terrified of my own mortality
I'm around that age too. You can be beautiful at every age. Every stage in life has something beautiful about it, we've just decided to focus on one little fleeting period. You are not running out of time. If anything, you've just started.
I felt that way at your age too. I'm 47 now, and even though I'm not thrilled about getting older, you have to figure out a way to be happy with yourself no matter what anyone else thinks. It's worrying about other people's opinions, that's what really brings us down. But life is an adventure and you have so many beautiful stages yet to come. I've lost friends way too young that would love to have my problems if they could just grow old
My sister just turned 13 a month ago and she is trying to get all these popular skincare products even tho she has crystal clear youthful skin (probably because she’s only 13!!) and it really had me concerned. Companies will make their products cute and aesthetic just to catch the younger audiences eye to purchase their products.
I saw a 12 year old on Tiktok and she was doing her "anti-aging" skincare routine. She isn't even fully grown and does "anti-aging" . Omg. This bs is very concerning. At this age I wasn't even thinking about one day being "old" and had 1000 things on my mind but "anti-aging".
😱That's too young to be concerned about it! At 13, I did not know what sunscreen was. Until 27, I only wore mascara for my eyelashes. After 27, I started using also eye liner and now I have added some rimmel for eyebrows.
I was watching a skincare routine video and there was this comment : "Does anyone have any advice for my 9 y-o sister?" I wish I was kidding :/ Girl, you're 9 years old 😳
The amount of little girls that come into my work (I work at Sephora) and play with the Drunk Elephant stuff is insane. My second or third day on the floor (I just started recently in November) a young girl was looking at it with her friends; she looks into the camera and I don't think she was recording but she says "I literally love Peptides!" Girl.... you are 11. Chill out. You are the exact same age as the girl I babysit. Which means that most likely you still have one. If you still need someone to be at home with you because you are too YOUNG maybe you don't need an anti aging skincare routine. U kidding me??
I’m 29 and went back to school this year for a whole new career, I go through waves of feeling like I’m starting too late and then remember it doesn’t matter as long as I’m happy and working towards my own goal! The “too late” mentality is really sticky and sucks your motivation, but just keep going because it really isn’t ever too late 🦆
@@sede.udin_5884 agreed!! My brain just sometimes tells me otherwise but I’m pushing through and enjoying this change in paths n_n thanks and I hope you’re following your dreams too!!!!
I’m 30 and I also went back to school for a career change. Most of my classmates are in their early twenties and when they find out I’m thirty they’re all surprised like “wow you look so good, I thought you were my age.” I know they mean it as a compliment but I feel so weird saying thank you, as if I should be grateful that I don’t look elderly at the age of thirty. Honestly I feared my thirties when I was their age but I feel so good about this new chapter of my life. We got this!
My boyfriend once told me: "You are 20 and thinking you're 50! Your life time has just begun to be the best and you act like it's over." That hits hard. I'm so glad you made this video for us.❤️
1. GEN X EXISTS even if you forget that we do. 2. Deleting or limiting use of TikTok/social media is the best thing one can do for good mental health these days. 3. Being ageless, I have the ability to connect with anyone on a heart to heart level. Physical beauty doesn't matter if you can deeply love yourself and others genuinely, care for yourself and others respectfully, and laugh at almost everything. Enjoy your life while you're still alive. Time here is but a flicker in the grand scheme of the universe. ❤
GenX here. I can dial a rotary phone, read a map AND adopt and use technology because my generation had to navigate the digital and analog worlds. Heck, we invented or advanced some of the tech ruining society today.
You’re called the forgotten generation for a reason haha and consider it a good thing tbh. Every generation is heavily scrutinized and you guys are just kind of existing.
A guy told me today that a woman in her 30s is her prime. She is still youthful but also has grown into her personality and is confident in being herself. My 20s were not fun. I hated myself and was so confused for so long
20’s 30’s, 50’, 70’s.. I think a woman’s prime is whenever she feels like she’s in her prime. It’s such a strange idea. I mean fertility-wise we peak at 16-20 but it’s about so much more than that. I hope it only keeps getting better for you
@@RomyElizabethGirl, fertility wise women do not peak at 16-20. That age bracket has the highest rate of pregnancy complications tied with 45+ year old women. Teen is NOT peak fertility at all.
I'm almost 28 and I've enjoyed aging so far. My acne finally cleared at 24. I have a patch of gray hair, but tbh it doesn't bother me. I plan on just going gray when the time comes 🤍 But mostly, I just feel like I'm more "me" the older I get. Like less concerned with fitting in or being cool. I almost feel like a kid again; just doing my thing and liking what I like.
I'm 28 and I feel so young and full of life, even more than when I was a teenager! I think it has a lot to do with having goals but also being open to whatever life might put in your path. As I let go more and more of materialistic ideals, I become so much happier. Of course it feels good to get myself a treat or to buy that shiny new thing but nothing beats having experiences with other people and living in the present. I loved your message at the end ❤
I'm 28 as well & I feel exactly the same! I was originally just going to like your comment but then I saw your name & you have the same name as my grandma who passed away a few years ago & it made me smile when I saw it so thanks for that 😊
I'm 26 and I feel the same. I look and feel better now than ever. I'm excited for my 30s and 40s and beyond. Like I came here to live and grow in consciousness. That's all.
I'm 29 and I feel the same. I used be very depressed from age 17 to 25, waiting for death so much. So one day I decided to start over, new career, new friends, new places to visit and of course, connect with my young self. The young version that used to be hopeful, loved dance, music, anime, etc. I opened up to new experiences in life. After that my life changed completely. I feel younger and prettier than ever.
Girl, when I turned 25, I started feeling like this was the downfall of my beauty 😮💨 I hate it bc I was so confident and now I’m like damn, now I’m old…
25 you didn’t even start your life seriously just 5 years before you became an adult and before that you were underage a child Wth with society this all rooted to misogyny i dont hear men being shamed like this.
You aren’t old at 25. That’s the age the brain reaches maturity. You’ve literally just reached adulthood at age 25. You’re not a kid anymore but you’re still very young.
As someone who hit 25 this year its really scary how my younger gen z friends really be saying I'm old and geriatric. I love myself and the need to "dress my age" is so dumb. Its so exhausting even though I don't let it get to me most of the time.
I'm nearing the end of highschool, and the obsession is real. Its hard to look at my smile lines, or undereye bags and feel very happy when all this anti aging stuff is shoved in our faces. But im trying to take inspiration from my friend and her grandma, who had a much more positive outlook on it all, why should we fear aging? I just want to age gracefully, not cower in the presence of nature.
I say, coming from someone who's parents have naturally aged gracefully, the most important factor is actually internal : avoiding extreme/ constant stressors and feeling confident. It can really do wonders!!
I think the way I see it is that these are the ways your body shows that you've truly lived. Like smile lines are proof of being happy and smiling/laughing a lot.
samee im gonna turn 20 in two months im not particularly scared of aging facially but im also just exsistential crisising over here 😭 all my friends are 20 because im the youngest and theyre all still having so much fun so i dont know why i feel like this !
@@damalams what you guys are feeling is completely normal and valid, take it slow, and don't compare your journey to other people's journeys!- take the time to focus on yourself, you'll get there :)
Gosh candyapple - I've had that crisis on & off my whole life & I'm over 60 now. Let yourself feel it, but don't let it take over your life. Wish I had something more helpful to say.
im turning 22 this year and when i became 20 i had that crisis too. right now im much more at peace with this whole thing! I think it's inevitable but it will pass, soon you will realize that there are people older than you living their best life regardless of their age. try to observe how others live, be it in real life or in movies, and you'll have a more broad perspective :)
I'm 33 and I have to spend a lot of time around zoomers. It's funny that you talk about inclusivity, but you guys failed to remember that age discrimination is a thing. I've never experienced so much ageism as around these kids. They are ruthless and shallow and i still look great. I feel sorry for how empty their lives and identities are.
Thats why people try to appear younger. Yea its obv the older you look the less and less younger people are going to be receptive to you. I'm friends with someone who is 30, and he literally looks slightly older than me. I coudnt even tell. But im still friends with him cause my inital impression of him was that he was super young. Not that 30 is old cause its really not. But somethings not adding up here. If you look great why would they still be shallow? But yea i mean if you are 33 and not getting some tasteful filler and botox for anti aging purposes and or skinny you won't be able to compete with zoomer women if thats what you mean. I'm literally a zoomer and I know people in the age range are literally at peak attractiveness men and women. Its only downhill from here. Its not a bad thing, but its literally the truth.
I feel like it's not that most zoomers outright hate someone just for being over a certain age. What they hate more is when that older person is trying too hard to fit in and act like a zoomer. I'm sure most of us were like that as teens. Don't take it personally. In fact I like to add decades to my age to play it up lol
@@whist6438Sorry, but your attitude is part of the problem. I'm 43; most people assume I'm 30. I've had zero work done because I believe in being honest; I find Gen Z's constant campaign on self-acceptance is laughable when they are all getting plastic surgery to look the same. I just prioritize taking good care of myself. Also, for what it's worth I continually struggle with self-confidence and eating issues.
I agree with you. I’m 35 and many zoomers make you feel old by literally telling you this and calling you boomer. They’re really projecting their fear of aging and when they get to our age, they’ll realize that 33 and 35 is not old. I think they’ll grow up and change their thinking. I remember being 18 and calling 30 year olds “old”. I was ignorant. It’s funny how many Zoomers call us “boomers” when we are 2 generations apart from boomers 😂
I'm 23 and honestly, due to all of the deaths of loved ones, both young and old that I have witnessed in my life so far, I don't care too much about anti aging. I just want to stay healthy and live to see my grandchildren as a happy old wrinkly grandma who bakes cookies for everyone. Sure, I occasionally catch myself comparing my face and body to others, but then I remember who my face looks like and how a lot of people in my life who have passed never got the chance to grow old and I stop being so hard on myself so much.
And now, they each live in you through your genes, features, looks, etc. dont change your ancestory. Embrace it. Age is a privilege denied to many. Like you said
My theory is that us gen z were promised many things in adulthood from previous generations but now everything is fucked and many things that were supposed to "make" us feel adults are out of reach. Buying a house, raising a family, building a career, these are all nearly impossible for the average young adult, so we are desperate to stay young so that we keep up that hope that things will get better and we will become "real adults" anytime soon. Also the unfiltered young internet fucked us up beyond belief
I've literally been saying this; when your achievements and mobility are like that of a child logically it would come to terrify you to age. Because it's one thing to be an adult when you are an adult..but to be a KID in life when you're an adult is too painful and now that that's the position they've put us in of course no one wants to grow up. It's exactly that 'if I stay a kid long enough maybe eventually at some point, ever I'll become a "real adult"'...
As a 44 year old, some viewers comments do not help, either: “ I’m 54 and people think I’m 25 all the time!” 💩 I’m 70 and people think I’m in my early 40s.” 💩 “I’m 65 and I just got carded!” 💩 I call BS on all of these people. As someone who works with the public I can assure you I have RARELY been shocked at someone’s age based on their appearance. I’d rather be fit and mobile than someone who has no wrinkles and yet has terrible health issues.
Ikr!! I have seen a few videos on anti ageing and it's negative impacts. The last thing i expected to see in the comments is "I'm 53 but people think I'm in my 30s" 😂 and now when I see videos of similar topics, i know what comments to expect. I always felt odd reading them but since I saw soooo many such comments I thought maybe Benjamin button isn't a fiction. You're is the first comment I have seen addressing this and thank you. I finally feel validated and not feel like I'm the one who is finding it odd🙈😅😅 I always feel a lot of warmth and comfort when mature women discuss life and ageing etc. There is something so loving, accepting and soothing in their advice. And then youtube comments show me the other end of the stick😂
Getting old enough where I don't get carded was the biggest win for me. Of course this still depends on the establishment and is just a standard procedure but anything is an upgrade compared to the time I got carded at a wine festival despite the fact that I had a wristband on that showed I got carded at the entrance already. Like as if I stole it or something. Again, I get it, procedure. But the LOOK the guy at the counter gave me is etched into my memory and i felt Iike a Victorian noble receiving a grievous insult.
as someone who's going to turn 23 in a couple of months, struggling with mental health, self love and body image since i was a kid, this whole video means a lot. i remember how terrified i felt when i was entering my 20s mainly bc of the pressure and expectations of being an adult. im so young yet i feel like im already running out of time bc i havent gotten everything about my life figured out. thank you so much for reminding me and others that its okay to struggle and that there's hope even when the journey becomes incredibly hard. sending you lots of love and im hoping you're doing well salem ♡♡
I posted this elsewhere but I hope it helps reassure you that it gets better as you get older! I had always heard that 'life begins at 30' and as a now 30 year old, i feel like its 100% true. I was always very insecure and hyper aware of my appearance and aging when i was in my teens/20s and I was obsessed with social media. But when i got into my late 20s I stopped caring so much. I think it was due to maturity and growing up because it was a natural progression and I don't think there was a turning point per se, but over time my priorities shifted and I stopped caring about the way I looked and how successful I was and I think I started to realise I couldn't keep up with the younger generation and that's ok. I barely consume influencer culture now because it doesn't relate to me anymore and life is soooo much better for it.
Hey girlie turned 23 a few days ago it's fine lol. You gotta remember nothing really changes. Just that number. I still feel the same and look the same..gotta rid ourselves of this weird self hate
I'm a late millenial (29yo) and I feel that the biggest difference between what I and my friends felt as teens and what gen zs are going tru is really around this ageism. And the annoying part is that they put this huge pressure on themselves and on others. Hearing that 30 is old is so wild.
I’m constantly hearing 30 is old and that I’ll be a grandma next year. Even my husband thinks he is old at 32. Meanwhile he has no visible signs of ageing and smokes like a chimney 😂. When I turn 30 I’m going to cosplay as Jenna Rink and be 30, flirty and thriving. The grandma narrative can do one.
30s are still youth .Even at 50 you aren't old . Unless you die at 30 it's not over for you . Being 30 or even 80 doesn't mean you can't be beautiful or that you are devoid of qualities just because you can't be 20 forever
We were NEVER meant to have constant and endless access to everything "perfect." Looks, face, body, homes, decor, lifestyle choices, parenting etc. The list can just go on and on. It kills the psyche.
I’m from Gen X and I’m still somewhat impacted by the current “look young/perfect forever” trend. I don’t even have social media other than RUclips. Lately I have felt like I’m no longer relevant based on my age. Movies, ads, etc., mainly push and rep happy young perfect people. I love how level headed you are about this. My son is 10 and I hope to always model healthy behaviors so he never gets caught up in the trap of feeling like he has to be perfect and he is no longer able to be happy and successful once he reaches his 20s.
Personally, men of my generation are obsessed with youth (and all men), and it rubs off on girls. I was told at 20 that girls peak at 16 and I was already too old. I was told this by a 23 year old. I was also told the same thing or similar things by men in their 50s
They all sound like predators. How the hell does one peek when they’re still a damn child and can’t even vote or drink yet? Nah they don’t need to be around young women…
"you are born on this earth and you have every right to live a beautiful life filled with happiness, peace and love. and that starts with you prioritizing yourself." that really hit me like truck-kun. i needed to hear that. thank you Salem. you really got me feeling like you are my older sister which i always wished to have 💜
I was talking with one of my friends about one of our mutual friends, and she said "You know one of my favorite things about Jay? When he smiles, he has little crow's feet by his eyes." And I agreed with her. How beautiful is it that he has felt so much joy in his life that his face is etched with it by the age of 23? You can see how happy of a person he is just by looking at his face. I think that's so wonderful and it's still one of my favorite parts of him. I can't imagine being so petrified of obtaining wrinkles that you keep yourself from smiling.
The only line I have at 29 is my angry face - between the brows - line xD I have it since my early 20s too, she's here to stay! But I agree "crow feet" are pretty, smiling lines are beautiful!
I was born in 2000 but I live and work around a lot of older adults and it’s always interesting to hear the overlap in what they all say. Almost every single person I talk to mentions that they were “just” something. “Just” a chocolate factory worker, “just” a pastor, “just” a farmer. Sometimes I wonder where we get this unusual but apparently universal metric for personal success. I’m 22, and my oldest friend is 92, but funnily enough we share a lot of the same insecurities about our meaning and impact on the world. But when I think about how much he means to me, how significant and complex and beautiful every one of my loved ones are, I suddenly forget all my doubts and aspirations as I look in the eye all that makes life worth living. To love and be loved is-in my opinion-the only way to live.
I’m hitting 30 this year and I used to be terrified of aging, especially after I broke up with my ex. But around 2021-2022 I started to embrace it. Every age has its beauty and aging is something we should be proud about as it’s part of life and tells you that you’ve made it. Many hasn’t been that fortunate Live Your life, Not someone else’s.
I'm turning 24 in a couple of days and I couldn't be happier to see myself finally showing signs of aging. I used to look like a kid and now I finally have my story, my life, my achievements and my struggles beginning to leave a mark on my face. It's astonishing how we all came to treat aging like a failure. I think my Never Join Tiktok life plan is definitely working the right way.
Ugh Salem, thank you for this video. I'm 26 and recently I graduated uni and I feel like I don't know what to do with my life and that I won't have enough time to pursue what I want to do with it. The last part of the video made me rethink about it. THANK YOU ❤
The days up to my 30th bday were terrible. I was super depressed, I didn't want to do anything. I've always hated bdays but that one was THE WORST. I felt like I was too old to do anything, that I had accomplished nothing. Still trying to get out of that mindset, but it's getting better. Thanks for the video, it was needed🦆
I was the exact same way when I turned 30 last year. Just had moments of sobbing and feeling so horrible about myself leading up to the day. Been about 10 months since and so far my life is better than a lot of my years spent in my 20s. Our life isn't over, there are still beautiful things to look forward to!!
A fear of aging is extremely valid. But I promise, your 30’s are way more fun and unhinged. Bc that’s when you get adult money and a minimal will to live lol 🖤
Something that really helped me deal with this constant fear of aging, of not being pretty enough, or missing out on trends etc. was just getting off of social media. It made me look at real people in real life more and realize that I’m good, there’s no filters in real life
Genuinely, the best thing you can do for yourself in a culture where we’re having our insecurities constantly reflected back at us 24/7, is to literally just not participate. Deleting TikTok, reducing time online in general, and enjoying human connection/reading a book/walking outside resets this outlook. It’s so freeing and you’ll start to appreciate what you have more instead of constantly seeking out the next “thing”. You won’t even feel FOMO because you start to see that people who are participating in this rat race are playing a losing game anyways. They’re unhappy and they won’t stop aging no matter how hard they try. Enjoy what you have while you still have it because it’s all fleeting anyway.
I relate to a lot of this. At 21 years old I felt like an absolute goblin stepping out of the house earlier. I didn't like my makeup and I didn't feel like I had the body to pull off what I was wearing. Two beautiful girls with the best makeup I've ever seen in daylight stopped me and told me I looked pretty. It helped put things into perspective. We are so incredibly hard on ourselves it's unachievable. No one will ever be as critical of yourself as you are. We're all doing our best and that's alright :)
I'm a millennial and just turned 30 and feel great. I had friends who died as young as 16 years old. One recently passed 2 months after his birthday of cancer. When it comes to aging these days, the fear seems to come from vanity. Which is all cool and all but there is much more that comes with growing older and it doesn't all have to be negative
as a 36 year old, I put way more pressure on myself about aging and where I'm suppose to be in life in my 20s. It got so much easier when I hit the 30s
I adore this video and I think more people need to talk about this. I'm a young GenX (girl why'd you forget us 😢) and grew up with a society that was so obsessed with being successful as young as possible, that I thought my life was over at 18. And I still have self esteem issues about getting old, it'll never go away unless you stop caring about what other people think and figure out a different way to be happy with yourself. There is no cure to aging, but i will say every new stage of life has something new and exciting to offer, you just have to look for it, find tge beauty in living.
I'm turning 44 this year and I also work in social media marketing, so I see this so much - this is also why my kiddos aren't allowed to have profiles on IG, FB, Twitter or Tiktok. Way the algorithm works is that it gives you just adjacent to what you really want to see. This is based on technology that was initially developed in slot machines in Las Vegas, actually. So if you spend a lot of time scrolling on social media, the end result will always be a feeling of frustration and satisfaction because that's literally what the algorithm's are kind of trained to do. That way you'll be more motivated to buy things and keep scrolling to try to satisfy that desire.
I just moved out of my parents last year and I’m 25, the amount of times people would comment on me still being at home created such a self conscious view on my progress. I work a good job but rent in my town is 1800+ and my boyfriend and I just weren’t ready before now to jump into a place together in fears it would rush our relationship. I try to tell people who feel bad about being at home that it’s no reflection of how hard you work or your life, it’s hard to get places out here man! I do get discouraged seeing tiktokers younger than me getting million dollar homes when I be out here struggling, but I’m trying not to rush my journey, I’ll hopefully have a house someday but in the meantime I’m gonna keep working hard 🤷🏻♀️ if you can relate know I’m proud of you and we will get there someday!
Wow I feel exactly the same way . I’m also 25 and still live with my mom , the pressure that I feel bc of social media is crazy . It really does mess with you . But when the timing is right things come . So you got this and just ignore ppl that don’t know your situation. They’ll talk anyway 🤷🏻♀️
@@brendaguadalupe8220 honestly it’s crazy that in America specifically there’s so much pressure to be out of the house by 18! Like other cultures live with each other but yet it’s so frowned upon here! I miss living with my momma so much honestly, it’s good to save money and it’s good to be close to family for emergencies too! I always would mention to people “why would I go pay rent when my parents have two open rooms ??” People gotta mind their own!
@@Snickers4Kawaii Yes ! It’s like everything is so rushed here in the US . I’m so glad I wasn’t forced to move out at 18 , and with how high the rents are in my state I couldn’t afford to live on my own . It’s better to do things at our own pace you know
Tbh I don’t see how it’s any different than people having 3 or more roommates. The cost of living is ridiculous and the job market is trash so I don’t blame people for still living with their parents. It’s very rare for young people to afford to move out entirely on their own and if they do it’s prolly cause they have rich parents
Definitely cringe culture plays a huge part. It can also mostly be a comparison between “flawless” instagram models. Cringe culture normalizes ridiculing normal bodies and normal people by their hyper-awareness. Observing every movement, every posture, living with that observation of life is exhaustive.
I’m so happy there wasn’t tik tok and Instagram in my 20s. I was able to just be, no pressure about “being old.” I just turned 40 this year and I feel like everything is falling into place and I’m happy with how things have progressed.💕💕💕🦆
I wish I had that. TikTok became popular around the time I turned 20 years old sometimes people who were only 2 or 3 years younger were already calling me ancient. Luckily I've learned to embrace my age now but it still bothers me a bit sometimes
I’m tired of looking young being called “aging well”. Not only is it an oxymoron, but it’s just creating an insane standard. getting old is beautiful. i’m only 15 but i’d never let the fear of aging deter me from living my life. i already have eyebags, laugh lines, and some light wrinkles. but that’s cause i’m a human being in a body. i’m just gonna live my life and my body is gonna look how it does.
@@I-Will-Destroy-U why are you putting that fear into them? they’re only 15 and have such a positive outlook, it’s a good thing. i know a 13 year old who is already terrified of aging. you do not need to project your insecurities on to them.
Gotta say, when you are in your 30s you think how young you were in your 20s 😅 and when you are in your 40s you’re going to think you looked so young in your 30s…it’s a never ending story. So we should celebrate the present and who we are at any age ❤
I for sure see this happening in gen z but please don’t forget women have been suffering like this for decades. There was a huge boom in the 00s in plastic surgery and gen z were just being born. I definitely don’t want to take away from anyones experiences because they are very valid, and very real, but this is not at all new. It just looks different. (No longer hero!n chic but slim thick) Great video Salem!
I think the virality of being a "self hate" tiktoker has become to normalized. Ive seen people make video after video showing why they hate themselves just for that to be their content and for it to blow up everytime gaining thousands of followers. I think self love and being proud of the differences or "cringe" should be given positive energy instead of constant "relateable hate content" that just makes everyone self consious and feel bad, because without fail the self love videos often get shamed on but the self hate videos get praised. Idk its weird to me how tiktok works
There was this girl on tiktok that always made normal beauty videos and then suddenly went on a spree of "my boyfriend broke up with me so I'm making another drastic change to myself" and I was honestly worried about her, it was such a dramatic change
thank you so much for this. i cried at the end. i have gotten off all social media besides youtube because of the type of content addressed in this video. its been almost 6 months that i’ve been off. it feels so freeing to actually feel good about yourself. when i spend less time online and more time is spent doing things that fill my spirit, the better i feel 💗😊 i really appreciate this video.
I'm 26 and my advice to folks my age and younger is to just log off for a while. cleanse your brain and figure out what you think about things without being influenced by strangers online. I deleted Tik Tok, instagram, and twitter in the last year and I can't believe how much that influenced my self perception in retrospect. Also, remember you will keep getting wiser and cooler with age. source: me and all my friends have gotten wiser and cooler over the years
I think a lot of factors play in to Gen Z's obsession with youth and beauty...it can't be healthy taking so many pictures of yourself and constantly seeing yourself in unflattering ways...also Gen Z seems to be really into Asian culture and within Asian culture preserving a youthful appearance is very important
My mom always says that she feels no need to dye her hair (other than some crazy color like blue or purple for fun) since she doesn't feel the need to try to pretend that she's younger than she is, and she says she got her gray hair from all the challenges she has faced which is honestly an awesome way to think about it
Hope you feel better now! I turned 30 last january and for me it was a sigh of relief. Like, allowing me to have some signs of aging and not focus on perfection.
It's so sad to hear that Gen Z feels this way. I graduated college at the height of the recession, and went back to grad school to basically bide my time (plus teaching assistantships were the one paying job I could find that required my degree ...). When I got out of grad school at 26, I remember being horrified and worrying that I'd never get ahead / be on track. At 35, I FINALLY feel stable and like I'm living my best life. I hope y'all get there, too
im born 1996 - so technically a millennial. didn't get IG till senior year of high school. it's insane how much has changed. thank you for the message at the end. at 27, social media conveys im soon going to be old at "30" so not true, and that i should have had it all by now. ty for this
same ! 96 baby here!. so ig that makes me a millennial too, even though theres a lot of gen z things i can relate too, as well as some millennial things. being a cusper hits different lol. i also notice how some younger gen z make us feel like we should prepare for retirement as soon as we go over 20, like girl no, im not even that old yet. the ageism of it all is so tiring. 🙄
last December I turned 20 and since I was 19 my family would always remark that I was not 19 but 20, to tell me and make me feel old and bad about myself whenever we would argue. So almost everyday I feel like I'm running out of time but I have to remind myself that in reality I haven't lost time at all, because when I was younger I was still a minor and suffering from depression but now I'm of age and can do a lot of things that back then I couldn't because of my age.
I struggle so much with comparing myself to the achievements of others and my perfectionism makes everything 10 times worse. I don't feel successful unless everything including my appearance is perfect. You saying "happiness isn't only for the beautiful but for everyone" is actually really encouraging, so thank you. 🦆❤
I gotta say, as someone who is 29 and doesn't use TikTok, look at the people around IN REAL LIFE. Nobody looks perfect. Everyone looks normal. You're fine.
Unfortunately the brain can’t distinguish between a digital and a real person. What we consider attractive is literally just an average of all the people we’ve seen, Our brains then benchmark us against that average. Spending time in the real world around real people is the most valuable advice you can give anybody!
That app needs to be banned. Also I think gen z is very ageist. Almost as much as boomers were.
I don’t use that app either, and it’s surreal watching this thing I don’t care about wreak havoc on society
exactly, like i often see beautiful "perfect" people online but they kinda seem unreal to me? in a way that it's unrealistic to look that way all the time. like im convinced that many people just need to go outside, to look at how everyone looks irl and appreciate the beauty of "imperfections"
Except cali
I'm tired of being told what's wrong with me whether it's my face, my skin color, my body type, my hair type, my race, how I move, how I talk, etc. I'm tired!
Preach. Let people exist in peace!!
Literally. And if you change something, there's something new that's a problem 🙄 I've been over it
same here and I have heard what was wrong with me my whole life , long before all this be perfect sh*t was everywhere , ppl should stop trying to reach any state of perfection cos "no state of perfection exists", what beauty is or isn't is all just opinion on what a majority find attractive and since it's constantly changing and is different everywhere in the world I gave up long time ago on trying to be how ppl wanted me to be or look a certain way cos you know what what happens if you get plastic surgery , lipo , fillers etc trying to fit into this beauty standard for it to again change and after all that money spent and energy wasted you find you no longer fit into the beauty standard you worked so hard to achieve ?, we should make a new standard take care of yourself , be your own version of beauty as long as your healthy keep yourself clean (personal care and hygiene ); then all that matters beauty trends last no longer than beauty it's self , trends change and bodies change so who cares life too short to worry about it all for nothing in the end anyway .
Girl, same
Omg yesssss😩
I blame the media. We have no middle age or older women shown living their best life, kicking ass, shown as aspirational, being it in tv, movies, or popular stories. Meanwhile, Tom Cruz, The Rock, Bruce Willis etc... keep making movies, impressing audiences, and aging. We need to change the narrative and representation.
Very good point- I turn 40 this yr and have really started to notice this.
There is a reason they call it ‘the invisible age’ yes…
I want movies with main female characters Tom Cruise's age so badly. Just being badass and awesome. Not sexualized, not "she's middle aged but so young looking," not the makeup artists on set trying to make her appear younger, not pining for her youth, no one criticizing her for being old. I want women to exist, live, and be happy. There's a huge market for normal women in movies, but Hollywood will never do it because they don't respect women.
Change starts at home. Start rewarding content that cast older women
@@GROOVwithme Examples?
I'm a 2x cancer survivor in my early 30s, and I promise you, aging is a privilege denied to many. I do my best to take care of myself, but I still have visible signs of age (gray hairs, a few small lines), and they make me happy because eighteen years ago when I was sick for the first time, I wasn't sure I'd make it this far. Life is too short for anti-aging straws.
Congrats!!! Beautifully said.
I'm glad you're still here. Hopefully you have a lot more wrinkles to look forward too, lol.
Glad to hear you are doing well👏🏼🙂
Congratulations and many more blessings to you ❤️
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: for every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
Matthew 7:7-8 KJV
I hope you have a good day, know that JESUS died for you and loves you so very much!
Picasso once said that a woman peaked at 17. Those shitty fears are rooted in some deep mysoginy and have been for ages. I hope we get to change that
picASSo
that's something only a p3do would say
Lol unfortunately expertise is domain-specific. Brilliant painter!!!...but probably not that that skilled socially 🤣
But also if you think about the time Picasso was born there wasn’t modern makeup how we have to now, no skin treatments like now no technology, anti wrinkle cream or any of that stuff now. Also the environment was more dirty, more diseases spread faster. Times have changed. Nowadays people peak at like 25 with all the new technology we have. We shouldn’t be listening to such old people who aren’t even alive right now. This is 2023.
Picasso was a shity person in general
As an older millennial, reading a 21 year old say she feels so relieved to see older women talk about being childfree & happy bc she thought she was convinced she was about to hit the wall at 23 & so many early 20 year olds having the same fear.
Y’all wtf??
I’m 21 and I’m already trying to prevent my non existent wrinkles! The pressure is real😢. Anti aging rhetoric is definitely affecting me and it’s so sad, why do I feel old already?
@@corrosivecub girl calm down everybody ages we are a human species
I’m 23 and even though I try to stay positive about myself and taking longer to complete college, when a lot people in my class find out my age I’m automatically judged and questioned because I “should have graduated already” (I’ll be graduating next year, while everyone else I knew who graduated hs with me has already graduated college). It’s really hard not to feel like a failure and sometimes I do feel like that, but can pull myself back together.
@@Onigiriedits I’m 24 and I’m in the same boat. I’ll graduate a few months short of my 25th bday. So many people are having the same experience.
My brother just got his first degree at 28 and I felt nothing but pride. Take your time people, don’t feel ashamed about it ❤️
@@Onigiriedits You have all the time in the world! I finished my BA at 24, I'm now 30 with an amazing (six figure) job, I'm halfway through my Master's (part-time), and have a cute little house with my husband and our 3 dogs. Life just keeps getting better, trust me. You'll be more than okay! 💕
Aging is a privilege. I knew friends who passed when one was 18, and the other 21. They unfortunately won’t be able to grow up and experience long life like the most of us. Even a few centuries ago, the life expectancy was 30/40. Enjoy every year you get, and be thankful for all the time you have💙
Love this and sorry to hear of the loss of your friends 💕😊🌸. One random pop fact I like remembering about a few centuries ago is that we currently live better than old-school royalty, After all, I don’t need to sleep beside a rotting carcass so that the fleas can jump off me and onto that instead 😂, Kind of makes me value the life I live now
Doesn't mean the signs of aging are flattering.
@@thisgenerationsfatass67 Wow. Ya know I almost feel sorry for you. But really, I hope you get the karma you deserve for that comment and soon.🤨
@@thisgenerationsfatass67 maybe to you but you can't talk about everyone?
@@thisgenerationsfatass67it never is, so that’s why we should focus on acceptance of normality and the idea of aging gracefully
i feel like it’s so hard to match the beauty standard. Kids feel pressured to look 16 at 12. then adults feel pressured to look 20 at 35. we just need to let people age naturally
Teenage models are in the fashion world sold to consumers in their 30s, and 30-year-olds are playing teenagers sold to teenage moviegoers
I wish women over 30 didn't just disappear to the world at large though. Women go from being literally hunted in the streets to being told we're "entitled" for asking why our McDonalds order was never made.
It's literally just a bunch of sexism, there's a reason you rarely see any over 30 models. Society, and not just the internet, acts like you've passed your prime and COMPANIES take advantage of this. Just like always, everyone eats it up too. Hell, just to enter a beauty pageant like Miss Universe you're literally not allowed to enter if you're over 27! AND you can't be married or divorced either, can you believe that?!? So f-cking stupid. There's also a reason why rarely any media you consume, like movies, doesn't have plotlines of young adult/adult characters who are aged like adults (not adults acting as highschoolers). It's genuinely my BIGGEST pet peeve of all.
Kids at 16 don’t want to look 12 are you fr😂😂 when you’re a kid you want to look older when you’re an adult you want to look younger.. these 20 yr olds wanting to stay looking 19 are bizarre as hell tho gotta admit that
@@mpro9446they said kids want to "look 16 at 12" u just misread it dear 😃
A lot of these issues wouldn’t exist if people just stopped caring what 17 year olds think about beauty standards. I’m 25, idc what a 17 year old thinks about my face or body. Go in the real world baby
Exactly!
Fr!! I worked at Starbucks since I was 17, left when I was 23. Those last few months a lot of 17-18 year olds were hired and most had that mentality that 30=old and expired. It was so frustrating. I was that age not too long ago and I feel like I did not have that mentality at all
@@jules5006 I don't get it. It's a blessing to be able to age
This part! 🎯🎯🎯
@@jules5006 "Old and expired"...that's awful. I mean, the fear of aging isn't anything new, but it's disturbing how the goal post of what is considered "old" keeps getting younger and younger. When I was 18/19 I used to work in retail and my favorite people were my coworkers in their late 20s - 30s, and I never viewed them as "old". They were great, super funny with vibrant personalities, and I loved asking for their advice on things. Now that I'm in my 30s, I don't get that feeling at all from Gen Z. It seems like to younger people, anyone over 30 is worthless or something.
As someone who is officially middle-aged, I think it's not healthy to obsess about how well you'll age. There's no point. You can have romantic and career success without being the hot young thing. It's never a bad idea to eat mostly healthy, exercise, avoid alcohol, and wear sunscreen, though.
Also, my youth in reality was not fun for the most part; I'm too busy having fun now to create a fake online persona like the young'uns🦆
🎉🎉🎉🎉
Right? Getting older and knowing yourself better, feeling wiser and experienced enough to know what you want and what you don’t want (emotional maturity) is actually totally underrated. Youth these days are excessively ageist, which wasn’t as common during my youth as I remember it. Just seems very shallow & I think they may need psychological help! The last 20 years of popular media was pretty yikes! 🙈💩😵💫 praying for them. 🙇🏼♀️
yes! as a 19 year old girl i do try to wear sunscreen, eat healthy, have an active lifestyle, and avoid alcohol because i know that those things are good for me. a lot of beauty sickness has infected me though so i deleted instagram and tiktok to avoid that mess.
Heard! I’m glad I have had a lot less pressure to have a persona online.
Yes! I feel so much better now that I'm in my 30s and I have the time/energy to do all the fun things I enjoy.
It’s crazy how society thinks and acts like when a woman hits 25 she starts decaying or something… 30 years old?? a relict. It’s the saddest thing ever and deeply rooted in misogyny. I’m 19 years old and I already caught myself checking the mirror for wrinkles! It’s insane and I’m working on not feeling so self conscious about getting old and having imperfections because honestly, it’s SO exhausting
Hey girl don’t worry, I barely saw my first “fine line” smile line one one side because I smile a lot at 28 y/o turning 29 next month. I’ve had this line for about 1 month and honestly I’m starting to accept it more and more each day. I don’t want to feel like I need to stop smiling just to not get lines on my face. Or that I need plastic surgery or Botox every few months to avoid the effects of aging. Think of your parents or anyone older that you love and admire. Do their wrinkles make you love them any less? Not in my case. I love my parents more and more each day. Any way I hope this helps you feel better ❤
Honestly - when i was around 18-24, I was up to my neck in researching different beauty methods that I wanted to get done as I saw signs of aging, I had an entire plan made (but no money at that point). Now that I'm 30, I really only want to keep all of the 'imperfections' - my fine lines give my face character and the few grey hairs that I have mean that people take me more seriously. My sister got botox and neither of us liked how it looked. I'm glad i didn't get anything done when I was younger, because i think there comes a point where it's difficult to stop the 'routine' (and I'm not saying i won't get something done in like 15 years, but who knows), but I can honestly say, at my age (that I'm honestly excited for) i have so many better things to care about than my wrinkles :)
So what I'm trying to say is - enjoy your youth, but maybe, like with me, this obsession will just go away on its own ;)
Honestly a lot of aging is out of your control. You can use certain skincare products and generally look after your health, but the reality is you might not like the way you age. As a 30 year old who looks older than her age, the best advice I can give you is to learn how to submit to the fact that you will age, you don't have control over it, and you might not always like it along the way. Just try to accept yourself the way you are and recognize that how others perceive you is not within your control. Focus on your strengths, your personality, and building your character.
♥️
@RedhairedBallerina I have the "routine" I'm 31. Started at around 27. I can't stop and it's no longer enough. I wish I never started. But things started to change, I was ina toxic relationship and I panicked and thought this would fix things. I ended up with an eating disorder too.
I'm 19 too and it is.
I turned 43 this year, and I'm here to tell y'all that aging is awesome! Two of my friends died in their late 30s (COVID and a heart attack, respectively), so when I say life is fleeting, I mean it. Eat the chocolate cake, take the trip, ask the crush out, wear sunscreen. If you do those things, the rest will inevitably take care of itself.
I'm sorry for your losses. I've had Covid too and struggled for months after that with respiratory problems. It was incredibly scary, so I'm cherishing my life and now really try to live it to the fullest.
Preach! Praise to the grays!
Yes, and yes. We're not saying not to take care of yourself, just to enjoy your life. We're going to die eventually, no matter if we never eat the Key Lime Pie or do all the other things. Self care is important, but part of self care is treating yourself from time to time. Everything in moderation. ❤
For real. Aint got time to worry about other people who see my wrinkle for one second and consider me a lesser human being for it. If that's how they see me, I don't want them in my life. Life is difficult enough already, worrying if I don't look like I just got out of the womb is my last concern when I'm focused on having my basic needs met, a house, a bed, food and financial security. Who cares about smooth skin when you're homeless.
Yep I'm 37, practically elderly by TikTok standards and yet I feel and look the best I ever have. Look after yourself, enjoy life and be kind to everyone. Bring others up around you and you will be happy and adored.
as someone who’s 33 it literally sucks to feel like you’re expected to look 20 forever, the whole “omg 40 is the new 20!” “You can still look hot and sexy at 50!” Like ok cool but when can we rest?! It’s out of control, I’m all for acting “young” as you age but feeling like we have to stay “hot and sexy” forever is really damaging, the millennials are the first generation who’s really feeling it
Sooooo damaging to our mental health! It's wild! (31 year old here).
Jep I’m from 91 , 32 now and it’s ridiculous
Exactly! That's how I feel I'm 28 going on to 29 and this is exactly how I feel too I welcome and accept aging because it's indeed a beautiful gift that many don't have sadly 😔
You are not the first generation to feel it. You are the first to vocalize it. As a middle aged lady, I appreciate you calling BS rather than suffer in silence.
I hate the idea that as a woman you have to be beautiful and desirable or else
I'm 41. You can't stop aging. It happens not matter what you do. Embrace it! None of this matters.
Exactly
46 genX here. Honestly it gets better as you get older. I used to be so fixated on my makeup and style but my happiest times were never when I looked great, they were when I was having FUN.
AGING IS A PRIVILEGE DENIED TO MANY
Watching BOTH parents fight cancer while still growing up ( only a few years apart) myself has really illuminated what is truly important in life. Not a day goes by that I don't grieve my father but feel gratitude for everyday I have here on earth with my mom.
Last year I lost my best friend to a freak accident. He wasn't even 30.
You can spend incredible amounts of money on the last and greatest creams, serums, cosmetics and procedures but none of that really means anything if you get into a car crash tomorrow. It won't matter how much time you spend obsessing over your skin texture and side profile when you are in the er covered in burns,fighting for your life... And that's if you are lucky and survive.
What will matter how you spend the time you do have here and the way you choose to treat others and conduct yourself.
This. 👏🏼💕
I’ve noticed Gen Zers are advocates until someone is elderly or disabled. There’s a huge overlap between the two, as well. Sad really.
This! And the small group of Gen Z that seems obsessed with mocking people of prior generations (ESPECIALLY WOMEN) for literally just existing in a way that is different from them.
It's so weird and ageist, like do they realize that they will inevitably age themselves (unless die die young I guess) ?
The "woke" in general don't care about those groups because they aren't trendy causes like anti-racism, feminism and LGBT rights. So much of civil rights is purely performative, sadly.
Everyone’s an advocate for mental health as soon as someone shows up with dirty and greasy hair due to not showering for a while due to depression.
@@neckbackcripplinganxietyattack or when the homeless man at the bus stop is muttering to himself a little too loudly
@@dazeslaysThat's especially true ☹️
Millennial here! I'll start by saying, I lost my sister a decade ago. I was 21, she was 23 going on 24 and randomly passed in a car accident. That moment changed my entire outlook on life. Making it to another year is a blessing and aging is something we should all strive for. When I turned thirty I was scared it might hurt lol, but I was proud to be the one who made it to the thirty club for both of us (She's always with me)
I do get the pressure of social media but comparison is the thief of joy and time is an illusion! My grandma is 77 and she always says " Your only as old as you feel." Live like this and no one can ever take your youth.. That's the best anti-aging advice I got.
So sorry about your sister 🥺
Thank you for posting something _so_ kind. ♥
💖💖
I’m so sorry to hear About your Sister- Millennial here too! I also lost my sibling at 22 … it was then I learned to not take a thing for granted ❤
Proud of you for making it this far too and I hope you have many happy healthy years to come.
Life gets good in your 30s. It gets better in 40s. Those are the decades where you usually have more money and more confidence with what you like, but are still active enough to do many things. All these people who think life peaks in your 20s...it's literally the worst, most insecure decade.
Turning 31 this year and I have never felt more content and happy with myself. Then again I had a mental breakdown in High school, suffered from severe anxiety and depression...so I reversed. 😅
So I can't imagine what my nieces and nephews feel in this current environment. It seems judgment is even harsher than before.
Hey 94’ baby here (30 next year). I’m so excited for my 30’s. I think it’ll be the best decade since I also experienced a lot of issues in my childhood and teen years. I still deal with my depression and anxiety but it feels like as an adult, I can enjoy my life a lot more.
I hope the generations now and after us realize aging is inevitable and beautiful! Wrinkles tell stories and our personalities are truly what make us shine. Cheesy I know but it’s so true
Fellow 1992 millennial ✌🏼
@@BooksToAshes 94' as well! I wish I was there 🙃 Not too excited about turning 30👀
Yesss to the 94 babies, gearing up for 30 is a trip
30’s sounds fun, I wonder what it is like?
As a late millennial, I realize over and over again what a blessing it was to grow up without “real” social media (we had MySpace and then Facebook in HS, but it was a very different vibe). I refuse to download TikTok because I know it will destroy my mental health/self esteem.
Yep. We are the last generation that will remember a time before the internet and was there for the beginning the internet.
Now everyone is a digital native
By late millennial you mean you were born later than most millennials right?
@@DS-us1vi yeah 1991, I think millennials cut off at 1995/1996
I remember having a Facebook and Xanga account. Fun times, but I was outside more than I was on social media.
Same! I’m not gonna disclose my age group on the internet, but I’m pretty young and I also refuse to download TikTok! Almost everyone in my grade has been ruined because of social media, especially my bff. One time I was singing toxic and she said “You said you don’t have TikTok, but that’s a TikTok song!” Like, honestly, even if we weren’t really listening to music like that when we were little you just know that it’s a old song by the mv and how it sounds! That story doesn’t really have anything to do with what this video is talking about but I just wanted to share that as an example of how bad TikTok is.😅
I’m 31 and went back to undergrad (wrapping up my last few semesters). Being around the gen z has been one of the most difficult things I’ve been through. There’s a sharp boundary drawn between those who are “instagrammable” and not. I thought conformity was crazy when I was in hs but I’ve never seen anything like this. Guys have more liberty overall because with girls it’s all 100% sad beige, Stanley, same clothing… all of it
I genuinely don’t understand how more women aren’t anti plastic surgery. Men for the most part aren’t running out to go under the knife or get needles shoved in their faces. Women say « I’m doing it for myself! » but I really don’t agree as long as the pressure for women to be perfect like this exists.
100% agree with you! It seems like a faux pas to say this because we're supposed to be accepting of "personal" choices. But we need to be looking at the bigger picture. As you said, it's mainly women getting this "work" done, and they're getting this done because they are insecure... because of beauty standards and obsession with women's youth.
Also, interestingly it is mainly men performing these surgeries on women. So, I mean there's nothing "empowering" about that.
@@JosieMarie-vg9ei choice feminism has its limits for sure! I just think we all need to examine the why behind the choices we make, I agree totally !
All my gay friends are. It stresses me a lot
Steroids are the male version of plastic surgery
much respect for u girl we love realistic queens
As a 28 year old woman, I will say, having never downloaded TikTok, I don't resonate with all these hyper real trends and their turnover rate. If you're depressed over your looks then maybe get off TikTok and see what happens.
yes tiktok is paticually bad but its all social media, its all built to be addictive
but when i deleted tiktok my life got better lmao
@@fromhell11112delete all social media. I won't pretend that's simplistic if it's a normal part of ur life. However for some it's for the best
Same. I have Facebook just to keep my older relatives up to date on the big milestones going on and Instagram to keep tabs on high school friends, but I've stayed off any other social media. I've always been rather confident with my looks. The only time I ever felt insecure was when I was pregnant, but that's a whole other can of worms
TIKTOK destroyed mental health
@@fuosdi64it's NOT the tiktok's fault. You sound like the boomers with their war on drugs "Drugs bad😡" while people with functioning brains were deliberately choosing drugs. Same thing here. Many humans are shallow and will remain like that for the rest of their lives. Can't blame the tool for making them this way. Take responsibility for who you are instead of pretending that a freaking app made you a certain way.
The self-absorbtion is worse than ever before in this world due to social media.
Tik tok specifically
As someone who is 27 and around a lot of people in their early 20’s I get told I’m old pretty often “omg your so old, hahaha” girl I’m not old. If my live in ended when I turned 25 then it would have been tragic. I love getting older it’s such a blessing
lil uzi is 27 and I don't consider him old yet lol
Kids
Only literal 7 year olds think 40-50 is old because time is incomprehensible to them. And those little children don't even think 27 is old... How tf could anyone think 27 is old.
I look younger then my age people tell me " oww you have maintained yourself" or "omg i didn't knew that i thought you're my age" lol😂
So to them 27 is a senior😂😂😂. That's nonesense
On the topic of feeling too late to achieve your dream. My mom always wanted to be a nurse and only recently went back to college for it. She’s in her 50s, graduating nursing school this year, and already has a part time job at the hospital. It really is never too late
Congrats to her! I just turned 41 and graduated last month as an EMT. My oldest daughter and I took the class together, she's 22 and nobody believed I was her mom. Aging is fun and it's def never too late to do what you want to do, and if you wanna change your mind halfway through that's ok too
@@intothevoid3719 that’s so exciting!! Happy for you!!
Most successful CEOs did not achieve success until after the average age of retirement. It was also not based on a revolutionary product, but by doing the same thing they had been doing for the prior decades of work with a minor tweak to improve performance/productivity/price etc...I find it’s really good to remember that just because something is trending through the media ( lol such as people under 30 who are billionaires) doesn’t mean that even a closely resembles reality
@@lunar686 I think we can all agree that "success" is relative though, and the majority of those people under 30 with mega millions didn't start from nothing like the average person does
@@kitty0chan444 thank you!
as someone that just turned 25 and is feeling the panicky crisis of the clock (even though 25 is objectively NOT EVEN OLD...ugh so frustrating) This video is really encouraging to me. My 74 year old grandma laughs and she's like, "you don't know what old is." and I feel dumb for feeling the pressure, but we definitely did grow up in different worlds for sure.
25 is ridiculously young like 💀
I'm also 25 and I've been having aging/existential crises since I was 16. At some point you realize the only way you'll feel better about it is by leading a fulfilling, healthy life (to the best of your ability). If you're satisfied with yourself and the choices you make, there is nothing to be scared of or worried about.
@@AlphabetCookie So sad I'm turning 26 in 2 months lol.
i’m a film major and i'm aware i’m going into an industry based on mentorship and climbing up the ranks so i've learned to be ok with not making it big until i'm at least 30. i wish more people realized that the average human lives to be 80 and deserve to find joy in more than just the first 15-21 years of that lifespan
This! Your life doesn’t end at your early 30s. If you’re not married by your late 20s then it’s okay, your looks don’t suddenly falter the minute you turn 30. Sentiments like that is rooted in misogyny anyway. Enjoy your life.
Well let's just say that Gen Z doesn't have much time before they find out the truth....😂 Literally another decade and Gen Z will become "old" according to their own standards. I doubt any of them will stop living after that. Every human generation will grow and come to terms with what life is. I know that Gen Z seems crazy but it's just a phase, like any other youth phase in the previous generations. It'll pass too unless a certain madman doesn't decide to nuke us all.
Both of you are preaching and I’m living for it ❤
I can’t emphasize enough how many good things are waiting for you in your thirties as a woman. Do not settle in your 20s to keep up with the timeline, trust your gut and make your way through the anxiety and self doubt of your 20s and in your 30s you’ll really feel the riches. It really pays off to take your time growing up and developing yourself beyond materialistic and societally expected milestones.
AGREE
Hard agree! My 20s were awful. I'm so much happier since I turned 30!
That "Can we just exist?!" really stuck with me.
It is so true, so powerful, so sad to even be in question.
Thank you for all you do.
Life is exhausting, but at least we are not alone in this.
I’m 24 and having all of this shoved into my face has definitely had a big part in my depression and self-hatred. I’ve slowly cut down on social media and purposely changed my algorithm to focus on cute animal videos or anything that’s not related to beauty. Although I still get these beauty TikToks, I just learned to scroll past it. I’ve seen a huge difference in my mental health since doing that. If it’s affecting me this much, I can only imagine the damage it’s done to young, impresionable teens
I remember when I was 18-22, I hated being mistaken for being younger looking 15-17, and having so many older guys try to prey on me. 😬 It was so uncomfortable and I did not like being infantilized. Especially after I turned 21, it was very frustrating to not be taken seriously because I was just a cute wittle girl.
Now that trying to look as young as a child is a beauty standard, that is so concerning 😢😢😢
EDIT: Holy smokes. Thank you for the replies all. I hear you. I see you. All of you are valid. And thank you for sharing your replies and making me feel a bit more validated as well.
So true! I’ve always looked really young for my age too and thinking back that attracted a lot of weird types.
I feel this so hard. I’m 20 right now and the infantilization is strong with people. It’s so fucking annoying.
I feel that, Im 33 right now but when I was in my early 20s older men used to approach me all the time then often tell me I looked like a high schooler especially when I had braces, looking back at that really grosses me out now, its really disturbing it's considered a flex for women in their 20s to pass as teenagers
@@themagicalfox6yeah it’s really creepy how some guys try to get at you thinking that you’re still a teen or are just now becoming of age
@@chanela.7786 yeah 🤢 its really disturbing! I get alot of men like younger women but still!
It sounds weird but I feel like the fact that I struggled with severe acne from age 13 to 24 made me less susceptible to these over the top beauty trends and standards. I hit self-esteem rock-bottom HARD during my teen years, never leaving the house without three layers of foundation, feeling like everyone was constantly staring at me, and crying myself to sleep regularly. Eventually by 19, when I had tried every fix out there to no avail, I finally had to reconcile with the fact that I had no control over my skin's appearance. All I could control was whether I let it run my life or not. And that's what got me on the skin neutrality/ skin acceptance train. Years later, I have definitely noticed my grays coming in, fine lines and wrinkles, and other body changes, but it surprisingly doesn't bother me that much. And I laugh when I hear about hyperminute things like "erase your visible pores" because having clear skin with the slight caveat of noticeable pores sounds like my teenage dream and the fact that folks are aiming for Barbie plastic-level complexions is so absurd.
I guess what I'm saying is I think there's a lot of benefits you can get from pursuing body neutrality on some level. What helped for me originally was purposely looking in mirrors less, challenging myself to go outside and do my regular activities without makeup on to see if anyone would actually treat me any different (they didn't), pouring myself into new hobbies and skills that made me feel proud and confident, and spending more time in nature to observe the beautiful oddities, assymetries, and imperfections found in plants, animals, and land formations. Seriously! Sometimes all you need is a little perspective. Hoping for the best for all Gen z and anyone else who is being victimized by these standards. 🦆
Beauty standards are not worth crying and stressing over. Beauty standards change all the time especially throughout history.
Literally always had the hourglass shape, a big butt was NOT a good thing when I was in highschool and neither was curly hair. Well when BBLs got popular people asked me about my figure how I got it? Now its phasing back out again and I’m still the same still bigger and taller than most women whether its in or not 😂
I love Salem’s videos and I’m in my late 30’s. I just wanted to say to all you young people life can be SO AWESOME getting older! My 30’s were overall my favorite decade. And in my opinion 30 isn’t that old like I’ve got 50+ years left, it’s all about your outlook on life ✌️
and that's on self love
I’m turning 30 next year and I’ve been saying to myself that it’ll be the best decade!
I had a rough childhood and bad teens years, my 20’s was me mostly waiting to move in with my partner after 8 years long distance.
Now we live together and I can’t wait for my 30’s!! I wish you the best and hope your 40’s will be healthy and incredible too ❤
I love getting older. Makes me think of Monica's quote from the tv series friends: I dont get older, I get better!" She was reffering to her coocking skills, but it's a fantastic quote nontheless. I love it 😁
Currently 25 years old, and life gets better, not because I have it easier, but I handle things differently. I see myself becoming a better person according to my own standard 😄
@@slychicken661 I love getting older too and that’s the perfect quote. I think I appreciate things more now and are way more grateful for experiences or even small blessings throughout my day. You find more joy and peace as you get older and stop worrying so much about what people think of you.
YES AGREED, IM 35 and feel like my best years are STILL AHEAD OF ME! ❤
my close friend and i are 28. she expressed her desire to wear sexier, more revealing clothes but she can’t because she thinks only people in their early 20s can. i told her that she made up this standard and she can wear whatever she feels comfortable in!
But 28 is a cool age to be and yes- it's young. So are the 30s,40s and beyond. Not everyone's peak is their teens or twenties. It's individual
It's so creepy how you're only allowed to be sexy when you're barely legal 🤢
Tbh, as an "aged woman " I feel like my peak is coming up. Just because the world wants me to feel old, doesn't mean I do in any kind of way.
How old are you?
When I hear "aged woman" I think 85. You're not aged until you're a great grandma hobbling around with your cute knit sweater.
@@tigerstone42239.. lol. By standard I'm old. I feel about 30.
@@AlphabetCookieabsolutely. Over 28 is considered aged. Lol.. it's just weird at this point
From what I understand, women peak in their 40s and 50s! All of the women I have the privilege of knowing have all reached the final forms of who they are during that time and have this power about them. There’s an sense of self-assurance, confidence and strength we’re all building up to that hits right around then. At least from what I’ve personally witnessed.
I’ll bet your 40s and on will rock! ❤
Deleting TikTok has been a blessing. I’m 20 and have been feeling the pressure of looking young. But getting rid of that app took so much stress away. I’m care free, enjoying the way I look, and learning not to care. I feel older than 20 sometimes bc I cannot resonate with these younger people
Girl you are 20 you do not have to look younger than you probably look. I hate this obsession and romanticizing of teenagers that is put in front of our faces everyday on apps and movies😒I do not mean it that I criticize you it is problem of our society. And another terrible outcome is when you are teen and adult man are after you you think it is normal because pop culture groomed you basically to it😭😭sorry for my rant 😂😂
Just turned 21 and I used to feel some legit unhappiness noticing smile lines and under eye wrinkles coming it. That was even without ever having used TikTok. You’re seeing your behind the scenes 24/7 but only most other people’s highlight reels. It really does make such a difference to look at REAL people and notice how little you care to notice lines or “sagging” on their face. You just see a face, their eyes, their smile.
@@joycor1419Thing about wrinkles is that you have smile lines because you are smiling so much! Isn’t that absolutely beautiful?
I know some celebrities say they try not to move their face to avoid lines.
Imagine forcign yourself not to smile, not to express happiness for WHAT?!?!
Every wrinkle, line, pore tells a story. Don’t dull yourselves and prevent life fron happening for some toxic, vapid, empty and meaningless stuff such as beauty standards (That change every week).
@@dianaselnekovicova948 im 13 and ive been insecure about myself because i feel like my time will run out and ill be unattractive and stuff like that its really hard but idk how to stop worrying
@@astrobeth do not worry you have plenty of time before you😄 and lot of time attractive people are because of their healthy attitude towards yourself. And all of them has something like wrinkles, saggy eyes, acne. Look at someone you think is attractive (in real world) and look carefully at their face their are not perfect too but still beautiful
At 25 years old, I definitely beat myself down for feeling like I haven't succeeded because I don't have excessive money or a house, let alone a job at the moment. Thank you for the gentle reminder that just doing what you love is what makes you most successful. Although I haven't obtained these ridiculous goals that I've formed from society's standards, I'm still succeeding because I've got my beautiful family, gorgeous plant-filled apartment, amazing friends, and so many hobbies that I can never get bored. I'm living the life that I've wanted since I was a kid. I just don't have it all yet. And that's okay.
Hello 👋🏾
Same. I’m 26 and we have so much more in store for us. Life doesn’t begin/end at any age. It’s a beautiful journey with no destination in mind 🤍
You don’t have to have a house. If anything it’s a blessing. Think about it: taking on immense debt for 30 years paying a mortgage while not even really owning your home. You don’t actually “own” your home while you pay a mortgage cuz the bank still owns it til you pay off your mortgage. When you finish paying your mortgage, yes the deed of the home will be in your name, but if you fail to pay property taxes, they can still take your home from you. So you don’t really OWN it if you got those taxes hanging over your head. This goes for countries that do have property taxes. Others that don’t, like the Gulf countries, Malta, Luxembourg, etc., you do own after paying it off. Not to mention, you feel tied down to one place while you pay off your mortgage. I like feeling free and having the freedom to move whenever I feel like it without worrying about selling a home first or “who will manage my property while I live in xyz”.
EDIT: around 17:40-50 there is an editing error! it got messed up when I uploaded, plz ignore lol
Dang. So people constantly be like: smile! And others be like: But no, don't make wrinkles, don't smile.
I guess I just smile outta my bumhole 😂
I have resting B face anyway.
Speaking as an artist, There are a lot of insecurities that I believe are absolutely beautiful. Hip dips? The feeling of sketching those in after finishing rough anatomy is wonderful. Different types of foreheads and noses? Each and every one of them I have drawn, literally none are unattractive
I think people forget a lot that beauty doesn’t have a single mold.
Looking at the world around us we compliment the beauty of forests and beaches, they are beautiful in their own right but still belong to the same world. Each flower is different but everyone has their own favorite
It sounds super corny but in the end I just kind of see things that way, and I think it’s important that we recognize beauty not only as one mold, but for all the little ways it sneaks into our lives
This is so true! I wish everyone could see the beauty of "imperfections" the way artists can.
I never figured out why people think eyebags are gross, I think they’re hot ngl
I have always found eye bags to be my favorite part of drawing eyes, and it looks so cool in the end-
@@artemisdelta1185 I make the eyebags purple and that's my favorite thing to do when I color eyes
I agree ❤
As a 38 year old woman I will say that I actually feel far more content with my looks now than I ever did when in my teens or 20s…and there’s something about being young that makes you feel inadequate. We all fear aging to a degree, but I do think that the next generation’s toxic obsession with infinite youth is mostly a result of aggressive (and often disguised) marketing seamlessly integrated into the fake world of social media. There is a huge industry out there making massive profits off of people’s natural insecurities. If an ad (or any video) makes you feel even more insecure than you previously did about something, it’s good to take note of this toxic tactic and decide whether you want to feed into that or not.
And aging is not all bad…we generally become confident and comfortable with themselves over time and give less of a damn about what other people think of us. We become less willing to be pawns of industries who want us to feel bad about ourselves...which is probably why most ads for anti-aging seem to target such a young audience.
I agree it definitely gets greater later and I'm also 38. My twenties was nothing but struggle and I have way more confidence than I did back then so I wouldn't go back to my twenties
Thank you so much for making this! This need to maintain youth is exhausting and I just want to age in peace. I had a 16 year old tell me I was old because I told her I was 25. 25! I never used to think 25 was old but I really had a kid tell me I was old. It made me feel … bad and horrible and I almost thought something was wrong with me for aging. But aging is beautiful and we shouldn’t be afraid of it at all. 😊
16 year olds are already unstable...coming from soneone who was 16 four years ago
You should’ve slapped that kid
Oh lord, I feel you! Since I've transferred to another uni, my 2001/2002 colleagues gasp whenever I say I'm 25 and the inevitable "YOU DON'T LOOK 25!!!" follows. How are we supposed to look like??? WE ARE YOUNG TOO!
I feel this bc I'm turning 25 at the end of the month and I feel old. I've literally been dreading turning 25 for years now and 25 is technically still very young!!!
@@emilynam6084 Exactly! And 25 is not old. Hell, even 30 is not old! So don’t let the socials pressure you into thinking that it is because you are not old until you feel old. You are as young as you feel like you are!
I feel sorry for Gen-z. Seeing them buy more anti-aging products than me, who was born in 1965. Like you said I was concerned about aging when I was young but not about looks but about being able to enjoy life being silly and having fun without having to become a cog in the corporate world. 🦆
I feel sorry for them too. I feel like the 90s was the last good decade to be born in.
@@melissam597 One unfortunate benefit is that we grow out of the corporate nightmare quickly once we realize what's going on. I used to collect products.. Now I quite literally only do what I feel like and can spot a "#ad" a mile away. I laugh at the new products to fix nonexistent insecurities now. It's so blatantly obvious that it's not useful, so they have to use psychological manipulation to sell. And now that we've grown up with psych ads, we can spot ANY psych ads. It sucks but gives us some superpowers, y'know?
My mom is 63 and never uses anti aging products xd (ofcourse she wears sun screen but not everyday but on a very sunny day to prevent skincancer)
I agree here, this anti aging stuff is so out of hand. I'm only 17, and I already feel like I'm running out of time. For me, all it does is make me feel terrified of my own mortality
I'm around that age too. You can be beautiful at every age. Every stage in life has something beautiful about it, we've just decided to focus on one little fleeting period. You are not running out of time. If anything, you've just started.
I felt that way at your age too. I'm 47 now, and even though I'm not thrilled about getting older, you have to figure out a way to be happy with yourself no matter what anyone else thinks. It's worrying about other people's opinions, that's what really brings us down. But life is an adventure and you have so many beautiful stages yet to come. I've lost friends way too young that would love to have my problems if they could just grow old
My sister just turned 13 a month ago and she is trying to get all these popular skincare products even tho she has crystal clear youthful skin (probably because she’s only 13!!) and it really had me concerned. Companies will make their products cute and aesthetic just to catch the younger audiences eye to purchase their products.
I saw a 12 year old on Tiktok and she was doing her "anti-aging" skincare routine. She isn't even fully grown and does "anti-aging" . Omg. This bs is very concerning. At this age I wasn't even thinking about one day being "old" and had 1000 things on my mind but "anti-aging".
😱That's too young to be concerned about it! At 13, I did not know what sunscreen was. Until 27, I only wore mascara for my eyelashes. After 27, I started using also eye liner and now I have added some rimmel for eyebrows.
I was watching a skincare routine video and there was this comment : "Does anyone have any advice for my 9 y-o sister?" I wish I was kidding :/ Girl, you're 9 years old 😳
The amount of little girls that come into my work (I work at Sephora) and play with the Drunk Elephant stuff is insane. My second or third day on the floor (I just started recently in November) a young girl was looking at it with her friends; she looks into the camera and I don't think she was recording but she says "I literally love Peptides!"
Girl.... you are 11. Chill out. You are the exact same age as the girl I babysit. Which means that most likely you still have one. If you still need someone to be at home with you because you are too YOUNG maybe you don't need an anti aging skincare routine. U kidding me??
I’m 29 and went back to school this year for a whole new career, I go through waves of feeling like I’m starting too late and then remember it doesn’t matter as long as I’m happy and working towards my own goal! The “too late” mentality is really sticky and sucks your motivation, but just keep going because it really isn’t ever too late 🦆
No, please start and do whatever you want. IT'S NEVER TOO LATE! Proud of you girl ♥️
From another 29 yr old girl
@@sede.udin_5884 agreed!! My brain just sometimes tells me otherwise but I’m pushing through and enjoying this change in paths n_n thanks and I hope you’re following your dreams too!!!!
Enjoy it! I'm 32 and planning to go back to uni as a "mature age" student for the SECOND time in my life, and I can't wait :)
@@cassidylhd that’s so exciting!! I hope you have so much fun n_n
I’m 30 and I also went back to school for a career change. Most of my classmates are in their early twenties and when they find out I’m thirty they’re all surprised like “wow you look so good, I thought you were my age.” I know they mean it as a compliment but I feel so weird saying thank you, as if I should be grateful that I don’t look elderly at the age of thirty. Honestly I feared my thirties when I was their age but I feel so good about this new chapter of my life. We got this!
My boyfriend once told me: "You are 20 and thinking you're 50! Your life time has just begun to be the best and you act like it's over." That hits hard. I'm so glad you made this video for us.❤️
1. GEN X EXISTS even if you forget that we do.
2. Deleting or limiting use of TikTok/social media is the best thing one can do for good mental health these days.
3. Being ageless, I have the ability to connect with anyone on a heart to heart level. Physical beauty doesn't matter if you can deeply love yourself and others genuinely, care for yourself and others respectfully, and laugh at almost everything. Enjoy your life while you're still alive. Time here is but a flicker in the grand scheme of the universe. ❤
GenX here. I can dial a rotary phone, read a map AND adopt and use technology because my generation had to navigate the digital and analog worlds. Heck, we invented or advanced some of the tech ruining society today.
Let them forget we exist! We’re the only ones with the skills to survive the zombie apocalypse anyway.
honestly came here to say this, sigh. whatever.
You’re called the forgotten generation for a reason haha and consider it a good thing tbh. Every generation is heavily scrutinized and you guys are just kind of existing.
Yea, I’ve been called boomer before and I’m like nah…I’m Gen X, straight outta the 80’s, best Generation ever!!!
A guy told me today that a woman in her 30s is her prime. She is still youthful but also has grown into her personality and is confident in being herself. My 20s were not fun. I hated myself and was so confused for so long
Sorry but he is lying trying to use you. All men know instinctively that a womans prime is at 20
20’s 30’s, 50’, 70’s.. I think a woman’s prime is whenever she feels like she’s in her prime. It’s such a strange idea. I mean fertility-wise we peak at 16-20 but it’s about so much more than that. I hope it only keeps getting better for you
@@RomyElizabeth so true
@@RomyElizabeth100% agreed you hit your prime when you grow into yourself and are confident
@@RomyElizabethGirl, fertility wise women do not peak at 16-20. That age bracket has the highest rate of pregnancy complications tied with 45+ year old women. Teen is NOT peak fertility at all.
I'm almost 28 and I've enjoyed aging so far. My acne finally cleared at 24. I have a patch of gray hair, but tbh it doesn't bother me. I plan on just going gray when the time comes 🤍
But mostly, I just feel like I'm more "me" the older I get. Like less concerned with fitting in or being cool. I almost feel like a kid again; just doing my thing and liking what I like.
Right?? At 32, I'm just a more integrated and more confident version of my 15-year-old weird nerdy self 👌
I'm 28 and I feel so young and full of life, even more than when I was a teenager! I think it has a lot to do with having goals but also being open to whatever life might put in your path. As I let go more and more of materialistic ideals, I become so much happier. Of course it feels good to get myself a treat or to buy that shiny new thing but nothing beats having experiences with other people and living in the present. I loved your message at the end ❤
I'm 28 as well & I feel exactly the same! I was originally just going to like your comment but then I saw your name & you have the same name as my grandma who passed away a few years ago & it made me smile when I saw it so thanks for that 😊
I'm 26 and I feel the same. I look and feel better now than ever. I'm excited for my 30s and 40s and beyond. Like I came here to live and grow in consciousness. That's all.
I'm 29 and I feel the same. I used be very depressed from age 17 to 25, waiting for death so much.
So one day I decided to start over, new career, new friends, new places to visit and of course, connect with my young self. The young version that used to be hopeful, loved dance, music, anime, etc.
I opened up to new experiences in life.
After that my life changed completely.
I feel younger and prettier than ever.
Girl, when I turned 25, I started feeling like this was the downfall of my beauty 😮💨 I hate it bc I was so confident and now I’m like damn, now I’m old…
Same. Once I turned 23 I started aging fast and I’m depressed by it. I think it’s cuz women are told we lose value as we age.
@@pr23487u must b yt asf- aging fast at 23?!
Girl bye u YOUNG dont let other peoples degeneracy dictate how u feel
25 you didn’t even start your life seriously just 5 years before you became an adult and before that you were underage a child Wth with society this all rooted to misogyny i dont hear men being shamed like this.
You aren’t old at 25. That’s the age the brain reaches maturity. You’ve literally just reached adulthood at age 25. You’re not a kid anymore but you’re still very young.
As someone who hit 25 this year its really scary how my younger gen z friends really be saying I'm old and geriatric. I love myself and the need to "dress my age" is so dumb. Its so exhausting even though I don't let it get to me most of the time.
25 - old? That is so young . Even 30s are young . Old age is when you are like 70+
I'm nearing the end of highschool, and the obsession is real. Its hard to look at my smile lines, or undereye bags and feel very happy when all this anti aging stuff is shoved in our faces. But im trying to take inspiration from my friend and her grandma, who had a much more positive outlook on it all, why should we fear aging?
I just want to age gracefully, not cower in the presence of nature.
I say, coming from someone who's parents have naturally aged gracefully, the most important factor is actually internal : avoiding extreme/ constant stressors and feeling confident. It can really do wonders!!
@@brigc7755 yess!! That’s what my friend said too! Her mindset was what really worked
I think the way I see it is that these are the ways your body shows that you've truly lived. Like smile lines are proof of being happy and smiling/laughing a lot.
@@officialnyasayes!
i turned 19 last month and i've been having an existential crisis ever since. its causing me so much stress. i fear aging so much and i can't help it
samee im gonna turn 20 in two months im not particularly scared of aging facially but im also just exsistential crisising over here 😭 all my friends are 20 because im the youngest and theyre all still having so much fun so i dont know why i feel like this !
@@damalams what you guys are feeling is completely normal and valid, take it slow, and don't compare your journey to other people's journeys!- take the time to focus on yourself, you'll get there :)
@@_salemtovar_ thank you ❤️
Gosh candyapple - I've had that crisis on & off my whole life & I'm over 60 now. Let yourself feel it, but don't let it take over your life. Wish I had something more helpful to say.
im turning 22 this year and when i became 20 i had that crisis too. right now im much more at peace with this whole thing! I think it's inevitable but it will pass, soon you will realize that there are people older than you living their best life regardless of their age. try to observe how others live, be it in real life or in movies, and you'll have a more broad perspective :)
I'm 33 and I have to spend a lot of time around zoomers. It's funny that you talk about inclusivity, but you guys failed to remember that age discrimination is a thing. I've never experienced so much ageism as around these kids. They are ruthless and shallow and i still look great. I feel sorry for how empty their lives and identities are.
Cherry picking inclusivity
Thats why people try to appear younger. Yea its obv the older you look the less and less younger people are going to be receptive to you. I'm friends with someone who is 30, and he literally looks slightly older than me. I coudnt even tell. But im still friends with him cause my inital impression of him was that he was super young. Not that 30 is old cause its really not. But somethings not adding up here. If you look great why would they still be shallow? But yea i mean if you are 33 and not getting some tasteful filler and botox for anti aging purposes and or skinny you won't be able to compete with zoomer women if thats what you mean. I'm literally a zoomer and I know people in the age range are literally at peak attractiveness men and women. Its only downhill from here. Its not a bad thing, but its literally the truth.
I feel like it's not that most zoomers outright hate someone just for being over a certain age. What they hate more is when that older person is trying too hard to fit in and act like a zoomer. I'm sure most of us were like that as teens. Don't take it personally. In fact I like to add decades to my age to play it up lol
@@whist6438Sorry, but your attitude is part of the problem. I'm 43; most people assume I'm 30. I've had zero work done because I believe in being honest; I find Gen Z's constant campaign on self-acceptance is laughable when they are all getting plastic surgery to look the same. I just prioritize taking good care of myself. Also, for what it's worth I continually struggle with self-confidence and eating issues.
I agree with you. I’m 35 and many zoomers make you feel old by literally telling you this and calling you boomer. They’re really projecting their fear of aging and when they get to our age, they’ll realize that 33 and 35 is not old. I think they’ll grow up and change their thinking. I remember being 18 and calling 30 year olds “old”. I was ignorant. It’s funny how many Zoomers call us “boomers” when we are 2 generations apart from boomers 😂
I'm 23 and honestly, due to all of the deaths of loved ones, both young and old that I have witnessed in my life so far, I don't care too much about anti aging. I just want to stay healthy and live to see my grandchildren as a happy old wrinkly grandma who bakes cookies for everyone.
Sure, I occasionally catch myself comparing my face and body to others, but then I remember who my face looks like and how a lot of people in my life who have passed never got the chance to grow old and I stop being so hard on myself so much.
And now, they each live in you through your genes, features, looks, etc. dont change your ancestory. Embrace it. Age is a privilege denied to many. Like you said
@@flowerpower7065 exactly!
My theory is that us gen z were promised many things in adulthood from previous generations but now everything is fucked and many things that were supposed to "make" us feel adults are out of reach. Buying a house, raising a family, building a career, these are all nearly impossible for the average young adult, so we are desperate to stay young so that we keep up that hope that things will get better and we will become "real adults" anytime soon.
Also the unfiltered young internet fucked us up beyond belief
This makes so much sense omfg
this makes……so much sense.
As a millennial I feel your pain.
I've literally been saying this; when your achievements and mobility are like that of a child logically it would come to terrify you to age. Because it's one thing to be an adult when you are an adult..but to be a KID in life when you're an adult is too painful and now that that's the position they've put us in of course no one wants to grow up. It's exactly that 'if I stay a kid long enough maybe eventually at some point, ever I'll become a "real adult"'...
Yes specially the pretty privilege. I feel like if I gain pretty privilege my life will be smoother . But my life is in God’s hands 🙌
As a 44 year old, some viewers comments do not help, either:
“ I’m 54 and people think I’m 25 all the time!” 💩
I’m 70 and people think I’m in my early 40s.” 💩
“I’m 65 and I just got carded!” 💩
I call BS on all of these people. As someone who works with the public I can assure you I have RARELY been shocked at someone’s age based on their appearance.
I’d rather be fit and mobile than someone who has no wrinkles and yet has terrible health issues.
Ikr!! I have seen a few videos on anti ageing and it's negative impacts. The last thing i expected to see in the comments is "I'm 53 but people think I'm in my 30s" 😂 and now when I see videos of similar topics, i know what comments to expect. I always felt odd reading them but since I saw soooo many such comments I thought maybe Benjamin button isn't a fiction.
You're is the first comment I have seen addressing this and thank you. I finally feel validated and not feel like I'm the one who is finding it odd🙈😅😅
I always feel a lot of warmth and comfort when mature women discuss life and ageing etc. There is something so loving, accepting and soothing in their advice. And then youtube comments show me the other end of the stick😂
Getting old enough where I don't get carded was the biggest win for me. Of course this still depends on the establishment and is just a standard procedure but anything is an upgrade compared to the time I got carded at a wine festival despite the fact that I had a wristband on that showed I got carded at the entrance already. Like as if I stole it or something. Again, I get it, procedure. But the LOOK the guy at the counter gave me is etched into my memory and i felt Iike a Victorian noble receiving a grievous insult.
It's so sad how those women think it's a compliment to be considered younger looking. Looking young is not superior. Just be healthy.
tbf some ppl are just cursed with babyface
yeah but some people really don t show their age. They can seems a lot younger. So your comment is a little bs too 😂😂🥴
as someone who's going to turn 23 in a couple of months, struggling with mental health, self love and body image since i was a kid, this whole video means a lot. i remember how terrified i felt when i was entering my 20s mainly bc of the pressure and expectations of being an adult. im so young yet i feel like im already running out of time bc i havent gotten everything about my life figured out. thank you so much for reminding me and others that its okay to struggle and that there's hope even when the journey becomes incredibly hard. sending you lots of love and im hoping you're doing well salem ♡♡
I posted this elsewhere but I hope it helps reassure you that it gets better as you get older!
I had always heard that 'life begins at 30' and as a now 30 year old, i feel like its 100% true. I was always very insecure and hyper aware of my appearance and aging when i was in my teens/20s and I was obsessed with social media. But when i got into my late 20s I stopped caring so much. I think it was due to maturity and growing up because it was a natural progression and I don't think there was a turning point per se, but over time my priorities shifted and I stopped caring about the way I looked and how successful I was and I think I started to realise I couldn't keep up with the younger generation and that's ok. I barely consume influencer culture now because it doesn't relate to me anymore and life is soooo much better for it.
@@katieholliday6190 thank you so much for this i appreciate it
Hey girlie turned 23 a few days ago it's fine lol. You gotta remember nothing really changes. Just that number. I still feel the same and look the same..gotta rid ourselves of this weird self hate
❤
I'm a late millenial (29yo) and I feel that the biggest difference between what I and my friends felt as teens and what gen zs are going tru is really around this ageism. And the annoying part is that they put this huge pressure on themselves and on others. Hearing that 30 is old is so wild.
I’m constantly hearing 30 is old and that I’ll be a grandma next year. Even my husband thinks he is old at 32. Meanwhile he has no visible signs of ageing and smokes like a chimney 😂. When I turn 30 I’m going to cosplay as Jenna Rink and be 30, flirty and thriving. The grandma narrative can do one.
@@Jenny-vm3yu TOTALLY. I'm really sure my 30s will be the best time of my life.
30s are still youth .Even at 50 you aren't old . Unless you die at 30 it's not over for you . Being 30 or even 80 doesn't mean you can't be beautiful or that you are devoid of qualities just because you can't be 20 forever
I used to think 30s are super young until today, i was discriminated in a job interview because I'm 29 years old 😞
We were NEVER meant to have constant and endless access to everything "perfect." Looks, face, body, homes, decor, lifestyle choices, parenting etc. The list can just go on and on. It kills the psyche.
I’m from Gen X and I’m still somewhat impacted by the current “look young/perfect forever” trend. I don’t even have social media other than RUclips. Lately I have felt like I’m no longer relevant based on my age. Movies, ads, etc., mainly push and rep happy young perfect people. I love how level headed you are about this. My son is 10 and I hope to always model healthy behaviors so he never gets caught up in the trap of feeling like he has to be perfect and he is no longer able to be happy and successful once he reaches his 20s.
Personally, men of my generation are obsessed with youth (and all men), and it rubs off on girls. I was told at 20 that girls peak at 16 and I was already too old. I was told this by a 23 year old. I was also told the same thing or similar things by men in their 50s
They all sound like predators. How the hell does one peek when they’re still a damn child and can’t even vote or drink yet? Nah they don’t need to be around young women…
Wrong,wrong and again wrong. Their opinion are their opinion,it isn't necessarily the truth . And no ,20 isn't old ,you won't be old for a long time
@@chanela.7786 They don't only sound like predators - they pretty much are predators ...
"you are born on this earth and you have every right to live a beautiful life filled with happiness, peace and love. and that starts with you prioritizing yourself."
that really hit me like truck-kun. i needed to hear that. thank you Salem. you really got me feeling like you are my older sister which i always wished to have 💜
I was talking with one of my friends about one of our mutual friends, and she said "You know one of my favorite things about Jay? When he smiles, he has little crow's feet by his eyes." And I agreed with her. How beautiful is it that he has felt so much joy in his life that his face is etched with it by the age of 23? You can see how happy of a person he is just by looking at his face. I think that's so wonderful and it's still one of my favorite parts of him. I can't imagine being so petrified of obtaining wrinkles that you keep yourself from smiling.
The only line I have at 29 is my angry face - between the brows - line xD I have it since my early 20s too, she's here to stay!
But I agree "crow feet" are pretty, smiling lines are beautiful!
I have those crows feet from crying tho I almost never smile 😂
I was born in 2000 but I live and work around a lot of older adults and it’s always interesting to hear the overlap in what they all say. Almost every single person I talk to mentions that they were “just” something. “Just” a chocolate factory worker, “just” a pastor, “just” a farmer. Sometimes I wonder where we get this unusual but apparently universal metric for personal success. I’m 22, and my oldest friend is 92, but funnily enough we share a lot of the same insecurities about our meaning and impact on the world. But when I think about how much he means to me, how significant and complex and beautiful every one of my loved ones are, I suddenly forget all my doubts and aspirations as I look in the eye all that makes life worth living.
To love and be loved is-in my opinion-the only way to live.
I’m hitting 30 this year and I used to be terrified of aging, especially after I broke up with my ex.
But around 2021-2022 I started to embrace it.
Every age has its beauty and aging is something we should be proud about as it’s part of life and tells you that you’ve made it.
Many hasn’t been that fortunate
Live Your life, Not someone else’s.
I'm turning 24 in a couple of days and I couldn't be happier to see myself finally showing signs of aging. I used to look like a kid and now I finally have my story, my life, my achievements and my struggles beginning to leave a mark on my face. It's astonishing how we all came to treat aging like a failure. I think my Never Join Tiktok life plan is definitely working the right way.
Ugh Salem, thank you for this video. I'm 26 and recently I graduated uni and I feel like I don't know what to do with my life and that I won't have enough time to pursue what I want to do with it. The last part of the video made me rethink about it. THANK YOU ❤
You got this! I graduated aircraft maintenance school at 32.
The days up to my 30th bday were terrible. I was super depressed, I didn't want to do anything. I've always hated bdays but that one was THE WORST. I felt like I was too old to do anything, that I had accomplished nothing. Still trying to get out of that mindset, but it's getting better. Thanks for the video, it was needed🦆
I was the exact same way when I turned 30 last year. Just had moments of sobbing and feeling so horrible about myself leading up to the day. Been about 10 months since and so far my life is better than a lot of my years spent in my 20s. Our life isn't over, there are still beautiful things to look forward to!!
A fear of aging is extremely valid. But I promise, your 30’s are way more fun and unhinged. Bc that’s when you get adult money and a minimal will to live lol 🖤
thank you
Something that really helped me deal with this constant fear of aging, of not being pretty enough, or missing out on trends etc. was just getting off of social media. It made me look at real people in real life more and realize that I’m good, there’s no filters in real life
Exactly
🥺🩵
Genuinely, the best thing you can do for yourself in a culture where we’re having our insecurities constantly reflected back at us 24/7, is to literally just not participate.
Deleting TikTok, reducing time online in general, and enjoying human connection/reading a book/walking outside resets this outlook. It’s so freeing and you’ll start to appreciate what you have more instead of constantly seeking out the next “thing”. You won’t even feel FOMO because you start to see that people who are participating in this rat race are playing a losing game anyways. They’re unhappy and they won’t stop aging no matter how hard they try.
Enjoy what you have while you still have it because it’s all fleeting anyway.
I relate to a lot of this. At 21 years old I felt like an absolute goblin stepping out of the house earlier. I didn't like my makeup and I didn't feel like I had the body to pull off what I was wearing. Two beautiful girls with the best makeup I've ever seen in daylight stopped me and told me I looked pretty. It helped put things into perspective. We are so incredibly hard on ourselves it's unachievable. No one will ever be as critical of yourself as you are. We're all doing our best and that's alright :)
I'm a millennial and just turned 30 and feel great. I had friends who died as young as 16 years old. One recently passed 2 months after his birthday of cancer. When it comes to aging these days, the fear seems to come from vanity. Which is all cool and all but there is much more that comes with growing older and it doesn't all have to be negative
it’s so sad to me that people seem to think that life ends at 25, because like… if you’re lucky you’ve got 60 years left! there’s so much left for you
as a 36 year old, I put way more pressure on myself about aging and where I'm suppose to be in life in my 20s. It got so much easier when I hit the 30s
I adore this video and I think more people need to talk about this. I'm a young GenX (girl why'd you forget us 😢) and grew up with a society that was so obsessed with being successful as young as possible, that I thought my life was over at 18. And I still have self esteem issues about getting old, it'll never go away unless you stop caring about what other people think and figure out a different way to be happy with yourself. There is no cure to aging, but i will say every new stage of life has something new and exciting to offer, you just have to look for it, find tge beauty in living.
I'm turning 44 this year and I also work in social media marketing, so I see this so much - this is also why my kiddos aren't allowed to have profiles on IG, FB, Twitter or Tiktok.
Way the algorithm works is that it gives you just adjacent to what you really want to see. This is based on technology that was initially developed in slot machines in Las Vegas, actually. So if you spend a lot of time scrolling on social media, the end result will always be a feeling of frustration and satisfaction because that's literally what the algorithm's are kind of trained to do. That way you'll be more motivated to buy things and keep scrolling to try to satisfy that desire.
Interesting. It makes sense
I just moved out of my parents last year and I’m 25, the amount of times people would comment on me still being at home created such a self conscious view on my progress. I work a good job but rent in my town is 1800+ and my boyfriend and I just weren’t ready before now to jump into a place together in fears it would rush our relationship. I try to tell people who feel bad about being at home that it’s no reflection of how hard you work or your life, it’s hard to get places out here man! I do get discouraged seeing tiktokers younger than me getting million dollar homes when I be out here struggling, but I’m trying not to rush my journey, I’ll hopefully have a house someday but in the meantime I’m gonna keep working hard 🤷🏻♀️ if you can relate know I’m proud of you and we will get there someday!
Wow I feel exactly the same way . I’m also 25 and still live with my mom , the pressure that I feel bc of social media is crazy . It really does mess with you . But when the timing is right things come . So you got this and just ignore ppl that don’t know your situation. They’ll talk anyway 🤷🏻♀️
@@brendaguadalupe8220 honestly it’s crazy that in America specifically there’s so much pressure to be out of the house by 18! Like other cultures live with each other but yet it’s so frowned upon here! I miss living with my momma so much honestly, it’s good to save money and it’s good to be close to family for emergencies too! I always would mention to people “why would I go pay rent when my parents have two open rooms ??” People gotta mind their own!
@@Snickers4Kawaii Yes ! It’s like everything is so rushed here in the US . I’m so glad I wasn’t forced to move out at 18 , and with how high the rents are in my state I couldn’t afford to live on my own . It’s better to do things at our own pace you know
@@brendaguadalupe8220 absolutely agreed!! You keep rockin in!! ❤️❤️
Tbh I don’t see how it’s any different than people having 3 or more roommates. The cost of living is ridiculous and the job market is trash so I don’t blame people for still living with their parents. It’s very rare for young people to afford to move out entirely on their own and if they do it’s prolly cause they have rich parents
Definitely cringe culture plays a huge part. It can also mostly be a comparison between “flawless” instagram models. Cringe culture normalizes ridiculing normal bodies and normal people by their hyper-awareness. Observing every movement, every posture, living with that observation of life is exhaustive.
And mostly associated with ableism and is practically ableist but also normalizes body shaming.
I’m so happy there wasn’t tik tok and Instagram in my 20s. I was able to just be, no pressure about “being old.” I just turned 40 this year and I feel like everything is falling into place and I’m happy with how things have progressed.💕💕💕🦆
I wish I had that. TikTok became popular around the time I turned 20 years old sometimes people who were only 2 or 3 years younger were already calling me ancient. Luckily I've learned to embrace my age now but it still bothers me a bit sometimes
I’m tired of looking young being called “aging well”. Not only is it an oxymoron, but it’s just creating an insane standard. getting old is beautiful. i’m only 15 but i’d never let the fear of aging deter me from living my life. i already have eyebags, laugh lines, and some light wrinkles. but that’s cause i’m a human being in a body. i’m just gonna live my life and my body is gonna look how it does.
i love this.
Please please keep this outlook forever🙏
@@I-Will-Destroy-U why are you putting that fear into them? they’re only 15 and have such a positive outlook, it’s a good thing. i know a 13 year old who is already terrified of aging. you do not need to project your insecurities on to them.
How can you say you are aging at 15😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Eye bags are mostly genetic so I mean..
Gotta say, when you are in your 30s you think how young you were in your 20s 😅 and when you are in your 40s you’re going to think you looked so young in your 30s…it’s a never ending story. So we should celebrate the present and who we are at any age ❤
I for sure see this happening in gen z but please don’t forget women have been suffering like this for decades. There was a huge boom in the 00s in plastic surgery and gen z were just being born.
I definitely don’t want to take away from anyones experiences because they are very valid, and very real, but this is not at all new. It just looks different. (No longer hero!n chic but slim thick)
Great video Salem!
I think the virality of being a "self hate" tiktoker has become to normalized. Ive seen people make video after video showing why they hate themselves just for that to be their content and for it to blow up everytime gaining thousands of followers. I think self love and being proud of the differences or "cringe" should be given positive energy instead of constant "relateable hate content" that just makes everyone self consious and feel bad, because without fail the self love videos often get shamed on but the self hate videos get praised. Idk its weird to me how tiktok works
There was this girl on tiktok that always made normal beauty videos and then suddenly went on a spree of "my boyfriend broke up with me so I'm making another drastic change to myself" and I was honestly worried about her, it was such a dramatic change
Iris x was it pawfect family by chance? if not shes another one who went thru something like that, it even went all the way up to surgery.
@@melancholist yes it was!
@@melancholist i never even really followed her but I just kept coming across her tiktoks, I really hope she's okay
the queen gives us another post!! I hope you’re well Salem ❤❤
im doing great! i hope everyone is doing great too
I LOVE YOU. I swear my favourite part of the week is watching your videos. It's so therapeutic. Love from Canada💗💗
awe omg ty
thank you so much for this. i cried at the end. i have gotten off all social media besides youtube because of the type of content addressed in this video. its been almost 6 months that i’ve been off. it feels so freeing to actually feel good about yourself. when i spend less time online and more time is spent doing things that fill my spirit, the better i feel 💗😊 i really appreciate this video.
I'm 26 and my advice to folks my age and younger is to just log off for a while. cleanse your brain and figure out what you think about things without being influenced by strangers online. I deleted Tik Tok, instagram, and twitter in the last year and I can't believe how much that influenced my self perception in retrospect. Also, remember you will keep getting wiser and cooler with age. source: me and all my friends have gotten wiser and cooler over the years
Or the best thing to do is not even indulge in that content in the first place
@@fuosdi64 true, if you haven’t started already save yourself the trouble
lol im 13 i grew up having unrestricted internet access and i think its too late now
I think a lot of factors play in to Gen Z's obsession with youth and beauty...it can't be healthy taking so many pictures of yourself and constantly seeing yourself in unflattering ways...also Gen Z seems to be really into Asian culture and within Asian culture preserving a youthful appearance is very important
that's a really good point about the Asian culture! especially with the increase in popularity of K-pop, damn that's gonna be on my mind for a while
Yeah but at the same time aging is respected in Asian cultures?
@@Octodaurus777 But the west doesn't care about that
@@Octodaurus777 What do you mean by that? Elders are respected in asian cultures, not looking older than your actual age.
My mom always says that she feels no need to dye her hair (other than some crazy color like blue or purple for fun) since she doesn't feel the need to try to pretend that she's younger than she is, and she says she got her gray hair from all the challenges she has faced which is honestly an awesome way to think about it
I dreaded turning 30 and have never been so obsessed with how I'm perceived. It's exhausting & I hate it and I really needed this video.🦆
Me too!
Hope you feel better now! I turned 30 last january and for me it was a sigh of relief. Like, allowing me to have some signs of aging and not focus on perfection.
It's so sad to hear that Gen Z feels this way. I graduated college at the height of the recession, and went back to grad school to basically bide my time (plus teaching assistantships were the one paying job I could find that required my degree ...). When I got out of grad school at 26, I remember being horrified and worrying that I'd never get ahead / be on track. At 35, I FINALLY feel stable and like I'm living my best life. I hope y'all get there, too
im born 1996 - so technically a millennial. didn't get IG till senior year of high school. it's insane how much has changed. thank you for the message at the end. at 27, social media conveys im soon going to be old at "30" so not true, and that i should have had it all by now. ty for this
same ! 96 baby here!. so ig that makes me a millennial too, even though theres a lot of gen z things i can relate too, as well as some millennial things. being a cusper hits different lol. i also notice how some younger gen z make us feel like we should prepare for retirement as soon as we go over 20, like girl no, im not even that old yet. the ageism of it all is so tiring. 🙄
Salem always makes my day every time she posts a new video 🙂
last December I turned 20 and since I was 19 my family would always remark that I was not 19 but 20, to tell me and make me feel old and bad about myself whenever we would argue. So almost everyday I feel like I'm running out of time but I have to remind myself that in reality I haven't lost time at all, because when I was younger I was still a minor and suffering from depression but now I'm of age and can do a lot of things that back then I couldn't because of my age.
I struggle so much with comparing myself to the achievements of others and my perfectionism makes everything 10 times worse. I don't feel successful unless everything including my appearance is perfect. You saying "happiness isn't only for the beautiful but for everyone" is actually really encouraging, so thank you. 🦆❤