Hey guys hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 5 Proven Steps to Rebuilding Your Relationship/Marriage. (Warning: Spots are limited) 💪 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> urlgeni.us/MCEP143DS 🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> relationshipsmastered.com/healing-partner-emotions 🎉 To see how all my clients have achieved massive success through dire & hopeless circumstances, click here! ruclips.net/p/PLQ8tvyhQlPzsNm-vC_g_8SWGcJRngefgU
Can every "nice guy" and "entitled "red pill" male take Geoffreys courses, please? Thanks, from the women who Want good men, don't want to raise a man-child, dont want to beg a partner, And absolutely cannot suffer another dead-end (un evolving) relationship
Interesting how so many truths in life seem paradoxical e.g the more you forcefully try to sleep or make someone fall in love with you the less that happens and now the more you start completely shield and protect ur partner and not let them do any of the work actually makes u more replaceable than being someone who helps them learn and grow so they in the end don’t really need you but it paradoxically makes them want you even more . Very interesting stuff . Almost makes you think you’re in a computer simulation with all these paradoxes
To me, this is what makes life so deep & beautiful. The moment I learned to see through these paradoxes, and the moment I learned to ENJOY the process of figuring out life... Was the same moment I learned to succeed in relationships, life and everything else. Simulation or not... Who cares...:) All I know is that it sucks to be in a position when you don't understand reality & unable to understand WHAT is happening to you & WHY it is happening to you. But once you crack these codes of reality, you place yourself in a position where you can begin to replicate your success, and understand the exact input you need to get a certain output. The successful EMBRACE this reality, and learn to enjoy the process of figuring out this reality... The failures spend a lot of time COMPLAINING about this reality, and hate the process of figuring out this reality. Which one are you?
Eye opening as always. When I first came to your channel i was thoroughly confused and my anxiety was through the roof. Now I make it a point to listen to one or more of your videos every single day and it really helps. Over the last six months you have taught me to really be honest with myself. I see how I was in the Intellectual Category, especially because I could not really cut it with the finance and all. So grateful to be taking this journey with you and looking forward to see you in the program some day soon. For anyone who thinks that not having the money is the problem, there is something Geoff said in another video that haunts me every day, "If you don't have the finances under control it is a good indication that your shit is not in order." I'm paraphrasing, of course. But it hit home.
Yup! Like we always say - No one has relationship problems, but people have problems with the self that reflects in their relationship. If you have financial issues, usually that indicates some internal/external issues that is most likely wreaking havoc in other areas of your life. Similarly, a lot of my clients find that their relationship issues also usually spell some internal/external issues that is most likely wreaking havoc in their financial life. E.g. Even for my most financially successful clients, they eventually realize that they have been succeeding DESPITE these issues, and once they fix these issues as they fix their marriage, they also realize their potential in all other areas of life increases as well. I found the same pattern in my life. I found that a lot of the same principles I need to be successful in business are the same as the ones I need to be successful in relationships, and vice versa. It's quite a beautiful thing!
Appreciate the kind words and honored to hear you've managed to learn from the videos! I put A LOT of time into each and every single one, and happy to hear that it's being studied!
Hey Geoffrey, I've been through a breakup recently. A lot of your advice from your videos sounds like it might apply to my situation, but sometimes it seems like it's more for people who are married, or still together and maybe going in the direction of a breakup. I made mistakes but I know I can change in a healthy way, building myself and being better not just for her, but for me and all of my life. I'm hoping as a result this ends up with us back together I was wondering if your videos apply to my situation, or if you have any videos tailored to break ups, and the recuperation of relationships that have ended? You're the wisest seeming guy on RUclips for all this relationship stuff..
Bing Bong - Yes, "Devote yourself to the process and don't focus on their return." But not correct on the fact that this applies to LTRs only. Jackson - Take a look at our client stories. Some are early relationships too. Whether LTRs or Short Term, you need to create the 5 pillars & make the same internal shifts. The foundations doesn't change. In our experience, it's normally easier for you guys in the short-term space - no need to deal with undoing & re-building.
I appreciate your self-awareness. Can you do us women a favor and kindly take a break from dating until you've considerably leveled up? A lot of women are over it.
I know what I need to do, but drains me with utter exhaustion as I'm depressed with dealing with the affair. I need to get out of depression to get energy for myself.
Focus on you, it's difficult, yes, but get your worth back, stand up for your values and it takes a long time, me it was almost two years, me I'm still recovering. See someone to talk it helps, i see a counseler and i chose a women to get guidance from a womens perspective insurance should cover it , it will get better even if it doesn't feel like it... One step at a time
This is why we stress untethering so heavily. I always tell my clients... If you don't learn to enjoy the process of growth and becoming your new self intrinsically... AKA - If you don't learn to DO because you ARE, and simply DO because you want to HAVE... Don't expect the outcomes you want to come to you... e.g. Imagine you see someone changing, but they HATE every moment of it, feel EXHAUSTED all the time, and you can tell they DO NOT enjoy it. Can you trust their changes? Hell no! You will think "If they hate it so much, how long can they keep it up?" Right? This is why we say - Internal shifts are KEY :) Without internal shifts, notexternal shifts will stick, nor will they be effective. Shame that most people ignore it, don't value it, don't take it seriously, or try to skip it! Don't be that person!
So I just watched this video and made alot of sense and I'm no 5 of the list but I'm doing what u said right now and allowing her to do what she needs to be done without me helping her but now I just had argument of me not caring or willing to help to watch her struggle so now I'm viewed as the bad guy...its almost ljke tour damned if u do or damned if you don't ina sense
Thank you @Geoffrey Setiawan. I'm a combination between 3 (75%) and 5 (25%). I keep fixing others, but not myself. And my family and relationship suffered because of it. Thank you: it's never too late to learn something new!
Please make a video about mental health importance before driving into these classes. I have mood disorders in my family, a lot has happened. I tried to listen to your videos and they make sense to a point. I started seeing a psychiatrist and go over family history and realized I have a imbalance I have to manage before I can even think about utilizing your strategies. I know you have a system etc, but mental health awareness is key before any of these keys can work in a practical sense.
I wonder if this could apply to a (ex-fiancee), the girl I truly love ended things with me, she could no longer "bet" on me. So I am working on changing, I know if I don't change for myself then I will never have a relationship that will last long. I was the person who would try to logically think things out instead of just being a person to listen to their problems and not deny them of their problems. I moved away from her, ( we had initially done long distance), and she told me to let us live our own respective lives and see how we are in the future to see if we are compatible. We talk occasionally, maybe I text her a bit too much. We did have 50 days of little to no communication. it's hard being distant from her, I miss her a lot.
Great video I agree with 80% of it. However only thing I see that’s missing is the fact that some of us men want a feminine woman! It’s in a woman’s nature to provide certain femanine qualities and needs regardless of how advanced civilization it’s that’s something that time cannot take from us humans! Time will never take away from us men the need to protect and provide as to nurture and provide peace for woman!
Man this is difficult. I want to be a student Geoffrey. I’d be the dumbest one you ever had. I lost my girl this time last year. And watched like 40 videos. She came back. And after a few weeks we’d always get into again. I could never hold the mindsets. I’d always randomly switch back to my old victim mindset. Then I’d remember and watch more videos. It’s like I have to watch 3 videos every day to stay in the correct mindset. A year of this struggle, we grew and grew and yet I still reverted back. So we have gotten into again. I cannot get her to converse. Everything becomes her assuming what I’m doing or saying and it turns into an argument unless I stay completely quiet. Now we have gotten back to a new break up. We might’ve broken up like 30 times. I really have been trying but I suck. Very very bad at this. I feel that if there is any hope at all. It won’t be for a while at this point I need to take your class and actually grow. If I can’t get her back then maybe I can at least become someone of value. Help! My name is Dion Jones 😊
Remember that I did not come out of my mother's womb knowing how to do all this stuff. In fact, I started this business because I was started out at a very very bad place (Probably worse than you are in right now). This is why I keep stressing to my clients that it's not enough to study this stuff CONCEPTUALLY, and structure my program in a way that forces people to master this stuff EXPERIENTIALLY, like a PERFORMER, into a massive part of your identity. All of this is a skill, and just like any skill, it can & must be learned and nurtured with the right WHAT (process), HOW & WHY. And it must be nurtured not until you can get it right, but until you can't get it wrong anymore. When you do this, the world will become your oyster. If you want to get different outcomes, you literally need to BECOME someone completely different, inside and out! :)
@@GeoffreySetiawan man how do I get in contact to start taking this seriously. I’ve tried a year and a month on my own. And I can’t hold it. I do very well.. until I don’t. Even if it’s a small moment. That’s all it takes. I need to change from the spinal chord outward. Please let me know how to get in contact about your program. Like the big one. The full deal. Her name is “My Sunshine” in my phone. If I can be a better overall human being and that result brings her back. Or anyone else who is as amazing then I will do what’s necessary. I’m tired of being a 30 year old boy.
@@eggmanslimz Considering that I talk about how to apply for my program in the beginning + end of every single one of my videos and resources, I am sure you won't have a difficult time finding a way to apply for our full program :) P.S. One of the things I did that is VERY BASIC that changed a lot was when I stopped doing "boy-looks". Boy-looks = When children ask their parents really basic questions like "Daddy, do we have any cereal?" before even TRYING to look themselves. Make sure you don't do this. It drives people nuts. You say you're "tired of being a 30 year old boy", perhaps you should start by being very aware when you're about to do a "boy-look" and stop yourself. It's an effort thing. :) Try it!
@@GeoffreySetiawan haha damn. Yeah that’s clearly the problem. 😅 I know where to go. You’re very thorough about it in every video. :) Maybe I’ll change my RUclips photo and name too 🤣 Just take that one basic as far as I can. Thank you Geoffrey for your time responding to these I know you’re a busy man. 🙏
Hello, in one of your videos you said that its good to encourage our ex to look for other options. Why do you think is that a good idea? Thats playing with fire. What if your ex then ends up being with someone whos part of the best 1%?
I've discussed this in SO MANY of my videos and interviews, so what I am about to say below is SOME of it, but not all. So much more I can say... When I was in this position, I said to myself - If my wife finds someone better than me, GOOD! I want her to be happy. So instead of forcing my wife to stay with me, knowing that I wasn't part of that 1%... I asked myself - How can I become the 1%. P.S. Just like I say in many of my videos, being the 1% is not just about money, but everything. (Spiritually, emotionally, etc...) This is only playing with "fire" if you have no intention to become the 1%. Like I always say, real high-value men aren't afraid to give their partner choices/freedom, because they know that they will choose them. Only men of low value are afraid. If you are afraid, you need to be honest with yourself and ask yourself... 1) Am I really that high value? 2) Do I REALLY care about her happiness? 3) If I don't believe in my own value, why should I expect her to? 4) If I am coming from such a selfish place, why should I expect her to spend her one and only life with me and never look elsewhere? 5) If I really think that my partner is such a wild animal that if given freedom, she will abandon all morals and betray people, then why is it mystery that she never felt safe and wants to get out if that's how lowly you think of her? I mean, would YOU want to stay with someone who thinks so lowly of you? 6) If you PULL and FORCE her to stay, do you really think you can sleep soundly at night? Do you not realize that the threat of other men will ALWAYS be there? Do you not realize that the ONLY way to true security is to become the 1%? Think about it. Remember - Give people enough freedom so they CAN leave, but treat them well enough so they won't want to.
Hey guys hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 5 Proven Steps to Rebuilding Your Relationship/Marriage. (Warning: Spots are limited)
💪 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> urlgeni.us/MCEP143DS
🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> relationshipsmastered.com/healing-partner-emotions
🎉 To see how all my clients have achieved massive success through dire & hopeless circumstances, click here! ruclips.net/p/PLQ8tvyhQlPzsNm-vC_g_8SWGcJRngefgU
Can every "nice guy" and "entitled "red pill" male take Geoffreys courses, please?
Thanks, from the women who
Want good men,
don't want to raise a man-child,
dont want to beg a partner,
And absolutely cannot suffer another dead-end (un evolving) relationship
Interesting how so many truths in life seem paradoxical e.g the more you forcefully try to sleep or make someone fall in love with you the less that happens and now the more you start completely shield and protect ur partner and not let them do any of the work actually makes u more replaceable than being someone who helps them learn and grow so they in the end don’t really need you but it paradoxically makes them want you even more . Very interesting stuff . Almost makes you think you’re in a computer simulation with all these paradoxes
To me, this is what makes life so deep & beautiful. The moment I learned to see through these paradoxes, and the moment I learned to ENJOY the process of figuring out life...
Was the same moment I learned to succeed in relationships, life and everything else.
Simulation or not...
Who cares...:)
All I know is that it sucks to be in a position when you don't understand reality & unable to understand WHAT is happening to you & WHY it is happening to you.
But once you crack these codes of reality, you place yourself in a position where you can begin to replicate your success, and understand the exact input you need to get a certain output.
The successful EMBRACE this reality, and learn to enjoy the process of figuring out this reality...
The failures spend a lot of time COMPLAINING about this reality, and hate the process of figuring out this reality.
Which one are you?
Eye opening as always. When I first came to your channel i was thoroughly confused and my anxiety was through the roof. Now I make it a point to listen to one or more of your videos every single day and it really helps. Over the last six months you have taught me to really be honest with myself. I see how I was in the Intellectual Category, especially because I could not really cut it with the finance and all.
So grateful to be taking this journey with you and looking forward to see you in the program some day soon.
For anyone who thinks that not having the money is the problem, there is something Geoff said in another video that haunts me every day, "If you don't have the finances under control it is a good indication that your shit is not in order."
I'm paraphrasing, of course. But it hit home.
Yup! Like we always say - No one has relationship problems, but people have problems with the self that reflects in their relationship.
If you have financial issues, usually that indicates some internal/external issues that is most likely wreaking havoc in other areas of your life.
Similarly, a lot of my clients find that their relationship issues also usually spell some internal/external issues that is most likely wreaking havoc in their financial life.
E.g. Even for my most financially successful clients, they eventually realize that they have been succeeding DESPITE these issues, and once they fix these issues as they fix their marriage, they also realize their potential in all other areas of life increases as well.
I found the same pattern in my life.
I found that a lot of the same principles I need to be successful in business are the same as the ones I need to be successful in relationships, and vice versa.
It's quite a beautiful thing!
@GeoffreySetiawan thank you. I still have miles to go. But thanks to you I have definitely gone a few bus stops away from where I was six months ago.
Thank you SO freggin much Geoffrey. ❤
We're not in the past.
That's right! :) The universe belongs to people who can ADAPT!
Thank you for all the great information. If I had the money, I would take your class. I have learned a lot just from your videos.
Appreciate the kind words and honored to hear you've managed to learn from the videos!
I put A LOT of time into each and every single one, and happy to hear that it's being studied!
Hey Geoffrey, I've been through a breakup recently. A lot of your advice from your videos sounds like it might apply to my situation, but sometimes it seems like it's more for people who are married, or still together and maybe going in the direction of a breakup.
I made mistakes but I know I can change in a healthy way, building myself and being better not just for her, but for me and all of my life. I'm hoping as a result this ends up with us back together
I was wondering if your videos apply to my situation, or if you have any videos tailored to break ups, and the recuperation of relationships that have ended? You're the wisest seeming guy on RUclips for all this relationship stuff..
This advice is applicable, so long as the breakup was from a long term relationship. Short terms (
Bing Bong - Yes, "Devote yourself to the process and don't focus on their return." But not correct on the fact that this applies to LTRs only.
Jackson - Take a look at our client stories. Some are early relationships too. Whether LTRs or Short Term, you need to create the 5 pillars & make the same internal shifts.
The foundations doesn't change.
In our experience, it's normally easier for you guys in the short-term space - no need to deal with undoing & re-building.
I appreciate your self-awareness. Can you do us women a favor and kindly take a break from dating until you've considerably leveled up?
A lot of women are over it.
I know what I need to do, but drains me with utter exhaustion as I'm depressed with dealing with the affair. I need to get out of depression to get energy for myself.
Focus on you, it's difficult, yes, but get your worth back, stand up for your values and it takes a long time, me it was almost two years, me I'm still recovering. See someone to talk it helps, i see a counseler and i chose a women to get guidance from a womens perspective insurance should cover it , it will get better even if it doesn't feel like it... One step at a time
This is why we stress untethering so heavily. I always tell my clients...
If you don't learn to enjoy the process of growth and becoming your new self intrinsically...
AKA - If you don't learn to DO because you ARE, and simply DO because you want to HAVE...
Don't expect the outcomes you want to come to you...
e.g. Imagine you see someone changing, but they HATE every moment of it, feel EXHAUSTED all the time, and you can tell they DO NOT enjoy it.
Can you trust their changes?
Hell no! You will think "If they hate it so much, how long can they keep it up?"
Right?
This is why we say - Internal shifts are KEY :)
Without internal shifts, notexternal shifts will stick, nor will they be effective.
Shame that most people ignore it, don't value it, don't take it seriously, or try to skip it!
Don't be that person!
So I just watched this video and made alot of sense and I'm no 5 of the list but I'm doing what u said right now and allowing her to do what she needs to be done without me helping her but now I just had argument of me not caring or willing to help to watch her struggle so now I'm viewed as the bad guy...its almost ljke tour damned if u do or damned if you don't ina sense
Thank you @Geoffrey Setiawan.
I'm a combination between 3 (75%) and 5 (25%). I keep fixing others, but not myself. And my family and relationship suffered because of it.
Thank you: it's never too late to learn something new!
Hi Geoffrey, thank you for your videos. I learnt a lot through your videos, to be a better person and to truly understand what am I doing wrong.
Please make a video about mental health importance before driving into these classes. I have mood disorders in my family, a lot has happened. I tried to listen to your videos and they make sense to a point. I started seeing a psychiatrist and go over family history and realized I have a imbalance I have to manage before I can even think about utilizing your strategies. I know you have a system etc, but mental health awareness is key before any of these keys can work in a practical sense.
I wonder if this could apply to a (ex-fiancee), the girl I truly love ended things with me, she could no longer "bet" on me. So I am working on changing, I know if I don't change for myself then I will never have a relationship that will last long. I was the person who would try to logically think things out instead of just being a person to listen to their problems and not deny them of their problems. I moved away from her, ( we had initially done long distance), and she told me to let us live our own respective lives and see how we are in the future to see if we are compatible. We talk occasionally, maybe I text her a bit too much. We did have 50 days of little to no communication. it's hard being distant from her, I miss her a lot.
Great video I agree with 80% of it. However only thing I see that’s missing is the fact that some of us men want a feminine woman! It’s in a woman’s nature to provide certain femanine qualities and needs regardless of how advanced civilization it’s that’s something that time cannot take from us humans! Time will never take away from us men the need to protect and provide as to nurture and provide peace for woman!
That's what I said. Which is why I said the lower levels are still NECESSARY.
@@GeoffreySetiawan I see! My apologies for the misunderstanding 🙌🏾
Therre's a deeper route to this problem .... if anyone cares, id like to share
My comment - youve made a good point
Between 3 and 4.
Man this is difficult. I want to be a student Geoffrey. I’d be the dumbest one you ever had. I lost my girl this time last year. And watched like 40 videos. She came back. And after a few weeks we’d always get into again. I could never hold the mindsets. I’d always randomly switch back to my old victim mindset. Then I’d remember and watch more videos. It’s like I have to watch 3 videos every day to stay in the correct mindset. A year of this struggle, we grew and grew and yet I still reverted back. So we have gotten into again. I cannot get her to converse. Everything becomes her assuming what I’m doing or saying and it turns into an argument unless I stay completely quiet. Now we have gotten back to a new break up. We might’ve broken up like 30 times. I really have been trying but I suck. Very very bad at this. I feel that if there is any hope at all. It won’t be for a while at this point I need to take your class and actually grow. If I can’t get her back then maybe I can at least become someone of value. Help! My name is Dion Jones 😊
Remember that I did not come out of my mother's womb knowing how to do all this stuff. In fact, I started this business because I was started out at a very very bad place (Probably worse than you are in right now).
This is why I keep stressing to my clients that it's not enough to study this stuff CONCEPTUALLY, and structure my program in a way that forces people to master this stuff EXPERIENTIALLY, like a PERFORMER, into a massive part of your identity.
All of this is a skill, and just like any skill, it can & must be learned and nurtured with the right WHAT (process), HOW & WHY.
And it must be nurtured not until you can get it right, but until you can't get it wrong anymore.
When you do this, the world will become your oyster.
If you want to get different outcomes, you literally need to BECOME someone completely different, inside and out! :)
@@GeoffreySetiawan man how do I get in contact to start taking this seriously. I’ve tried a year and a month on my own. And I can’t hold it. I do very well.. until I don’t. Even if it’s a small moment. That’s all it takes. I need to change from the spinal chord outward.
Please let me know how to get in contact about your program. Like the big one. The full deal. Her name is “My Sunshine” in my phone. If I can be a better overall human being and that result brings her back. Or anyone else who is as amazing then I will do what’s necessary. I’m tired of being a 30 year old boy.
@@eggmanslimz Considering that I talk about how to apply for my program in the beginning + end of every single one of my videos and resources, I am sure you won't have a difficult time finding a way to apply for our full program :)
P.S. One of the things I did that is VERY BASIC that changed a lot was when I stopped doing "boy-looks".
Boy-looks = When children ask their parents really basic questions like "Daddy, do we have any cereal?" before even TRYING to look themselves.
Make sure you don't do this. It drives people nuts. You say you're "tired of being a 30 year old boy", perhaps you should start by being very aware when you're about to do a "boy-look" and stop yourself.
It's an effort thing. :)
Try it!
@@GeoffreySetiawan haha damn. Yeah that’s clearly the problem. 😅 I know where to go. You’re very thorough about it in every video. :)
Maybe I’ll change my RUclips photo and name too 🤣
Just take that one basic as far as I can.
Thank you Geoffrey for your time responding to these I know you’re a busy man.
🙏
Hello, in one of your videos you said that its good to encourage our ex to look for other options. Why do you think is that a good idea? Thats playing with fire. What if your ex then ends up being with someone whos part of the best 1%?
I've discussed this in SO MANY of my videos and interviews, so what I am about to say below is SOME of it, but not all. So much more I can say...
When I was in this position, I said to myself - If my wife finds someone better than me, GOOD! I want her to be happy.
So instead of forcing my wife to stay with me, knowing that I wasn't part of that 1%...
I asked myself - How can I become the 1%.
P.S. Just like I say in many of my videos, being the 1% is not just about money, but everything. (Spiritually, emotionally, etc...)
This is only playing with "fire" if you have no intention to become the 1%.
Like I always say, real high-value men aren't afraid to give their partner choices/freedom, because they know that they will choose them.
Only men of low value are afraid. If you are afraid, you need to be honest with yourself and ask yourself...
1) Am I really that high value?
2) Do I REALLY care about her happiness?
3) If I don't believe in my own value, why should I expect her to?
4) If I am coming from such a selfish place, why should I expect her to spend her one and only life with me and never look elsewhere?
5) If I really think that my partner is such a wild animal that if given freedom, she will abandon all morals and betray people, then why is it mystery that she never felt safe and wants to get out if that's how lowly you think of her? I mean, would YOU want to stay with someone who thinks so lowly of you?
6) If you PULL and FORCE her to stay, do you really think you can sleep soundly at night? Do you not realize that the threat of other men will ALWAYS be there? Do you not realize that the ONLY way to true security is to become the 1%? Think about it.
Remember - Give people enough freedom so they CAN leave, but treat them well enough so they won't want to.
This is gold thank you.
Appreciate yah!