HTSM (So Far) #36 - (EMOTIONAL) Nadia REDUCES Mark to TEARS with HER 3 Wishes for a BETTER Marriage
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- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- This relationship podcast takes a distinct turn for the worse mid-way through. But, it fully reveals the ways in which a misunderstanding can snowball into something much much bigger ...
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Guys I found this to be very powerful. You are both repeating your childhood wounds of not receiving the love, the nurturing, affection and most importantly attunement from your primary caregivers. Like when mark got upset there and nadia's gut instinct was to go and hug him, Mark just seemed to want to be left alone and given time to brush his wounds off and reset his emotions and demeanour. This was probably what he had to do over and over again as a small child. Most of us were shamed for having feelings. When we're now aware our feelings and emotions are our entire navigation system for the entirety of our life and every relationship in it. I feel you are both coming from similar place of wounding and nature is repeatedly bringing this up for you two to work through and heal your childhood wounds. You two are to be commended for sharing so openly and honestly. 💞🌟
Jo M thank you so much for your thoughtful detailed reply . Just read this to mark and we both had a little cry xxx
Wow this was hArd to watch I felt so sorry for mark he has a struggle with feelings he doesn’t know how to express I have had A struggle with nerves and depression sense I was 19yrs old I M 80 now and still dealing with it unless you have had this problem you can’t possibly u
U nderstand the horrow of what we feel. It’s really hard to exist In a society of people who don’t have this
I really wish the Best to you both I do believe you need God in both your lives I mean a deep comment ion to a living God who can help when man just throws in the towel best decision I ever made was to give my heart and soul to God and let Him lead me in the way that was the. Best
Just finished all the podcast and i wanted to say Mark, I have lots of love for you through understanding of your upbringing, addiction, the way you see the world and how you feel and perceive things because I relate to it all so much. When you cried I cried with you. You are trying so hard in everything you do and are an amazing human being without alcohol, you just see and feel things much more deeply than most people. I am the same, it's a blessing and a curse. Try not to look too deeply at nadias need for affection. I follow you everyday and see you trying in your own way all the time. You do so many sweet affectionate, caring things that I could only wish for in a partner but nadias idea of affection is different and that doesn't mean you're not trying. Like I said in my other comment. It's an absolute minefield getting it right between 2 people. Sending love to you both, amazing couple ❤️
I too can relate. Some of us are over thinkers and perfectionists. Being a perfectionist can bring out so many frustrations.
A real man is not afraid to show his feelings, even more so sharing them with over 60, 000 subs! Another incredibly honest and open vlog.
You guys are super. I'm in tears watching you.
You're so in love and yet acknowledge the real day to day issues we all encounter in our marriages. That giving of affection is difficult for a lot of men. And it does boil down to Upbringing, in my opinion.
Hope you've both had a lovely coffee and held eachother 💞💞
You guys are the most beautiful, honest people on RUclips- never have I seen a channel of this bonda fide calibre.
deceased wow ! Thank you so much . We put so much into our channel so this kind of message makes our day ! X
Amazing, so raw but so real, I admire you both so much for your honesty thank you xx
You two have no idea what you just did..... this one podcast along, will save so many relationships ... this just solidified for me that the relationship I was in was the one I should’ve been in.... thank you, looking at this makes me want to be better for my next one.
Fkin, amazing!. The raw honesty, it’s nice to see the true reactions mark even if it is tears. Love you guys. Xx
Oh Mark you made me cry! When will you realise what a wonderful man, father, husband you are! No you are not perfect, yes you will make mistakes, welcome to the real world! 😂 And that's OK! 😇 big hugs to you X
Thank you for just being you, you both are amazing. You are raw honest but real. Keep being yourselves as it’s refreshing xx
Im married to one of the so called real men, 64yrs old frm london, who doesn't cry, doesn't express emotion, will never admitt he's wrong or say sorry, is not sympathetic to my depression or feelings, he just won't talk about real life, is verbally and once physically violent...but does hold my hand when out wiv me 😊. We all have our faults but mark yet again has shown his vulnerability...and it just shows me that there are men out there like mark, who can think of and love others. As u say no marriage is perfect and you often seek guidence, but what i see is a couple who truly want to listen to and support, each other...i wish i had that. Keep fighting for what you have. Love u two lots xx
I'm not married or in a relationship but I find these really insightful. Its lovely too see your marriage and the commitment you make to making it work. I had a bad relationship when I was young. It has prevented me from opening up to anyone again and is an issue I find hard to overcome. I hope I find someone who adores me like Mark does you Nadia xx
Ellie w it’s been a long and sometimes very tough journey between us . Maybe think about talking to someone professional about what happened so you can open yourself to possibilities ?
Yeah I've had CBT which has really helped. I have bipolar disorder and generalised anxiety disorder so that is a big part to play and think I've just got used to being on my own but also do feel lonely. Maybe 4 dogs instead 😂x
@@shirleyvalentine2794 Thanks for the encouragement. I have completed my CBT now and have been on 2 dates. Always think there is an alteria motive and see red flags straight away then back off. I've come to the realisation I need to be content with me and learn to love myself before anyone else can. Life hey!! X
Now I want to give you both a hug! Maybe you should both ask each other when you want affection, so Nadia, when you feel like you want affection - ask Mark for a cuddle if he’s not on the same wavelength and visa versa with Mark, it doesn’t matter if either of you have to ask for affection, when in a couple we aren’t all mind readers. You two love eachother dearly xx
Crikey guys, that was tough to watch. I was crying like a baby for Mark. I applaud your honestly to each other. Big hugs to you both x
Hi Nadia and Mark
Thank you for deciding to put this conversation up, I'm sure it was very difficult and emotionally draining but it really felt like you got to something important.
My hubby and I have arguments once in a while that end up with tears and revelations, and even though it's hard at the time, we move forward with a deeper understanding of each other. We also seem to really get to the root of the problem instead of just seeing the symptoms and wondering why nothing ever seems to change.
I've been watching you guys for a while now, and I have so much affection for both of you. You've given all of us a real blessing to invite us into your lives, and allow us to get to know you and your family.
You might get the odd criticism here and there, but on a fundamental level you are good people who are thoughtful, kind and just trying your very best. The fact that you can be so honest, vulnerable and open is a testament to that.
Keep doing what you're doing ♥️
Awww guys, I've just been crying with you.... It's really difficult isn't it. When I look at Mark, I see a kind man who absoloutely adores his wife, she's at the forefront of his mind in all he does, even the garden. So much of his comments in volgs and stuff he orders online is all for Nadia and what she would like. Nadia you are just as lovely with Mark, you helped him supported him and stood by his addiction and that takes a very special person to do so. The showing of affection can be worked on but also there is affection in thoughtfulness and in the thibgs you do. Thank you SO much for sharing this very personal vlog with us, you are a truly special couple/ family 💖💖
Just adore how genuine and uncensored you guys are, just some of the many reasons I find such comfort in your videos x
Mark, I think you were great before but now I fucking love you!!! Thank you so much for sharing your vulnerability and allowing us to see a real man with feelings and emotions. You aswell Nadia just absolutely love you guys..xxx
Wow! Totally applaud you both for being so brave to put this out there. You showed a raw vulnerability that has got to us all! Very emotional - I just want to join the queue of people on here wanting to give mark a big hug. Mark you haven't let Nadia down - she just wishes you could see yourself how she and your girls see you. Love to you both xx
Thank you both for sharing that!! I hope more and more people keep watching you as marriages would survive.... and children would be happier.!! You are such an inspiration 😘
I am so grateful to both of you for being vulnerable enough to put this online. There is nothing else like this podcast. I think it's beautiful to be let in to such an intimate moment and see how two very different, very strong-minded, very caring and articulate people work for their relationship. No one cares if you film on your phones, there is quality content enough to spare for 50 podcasts.
Mark, this is one powerful video and we are so proud of both you and Nadia for showing us this raw emotion. I think we were all feeling the emotion Mark was going through when he started to get upset. I lost my partner just over a year ago and so miss the spontaneous hugs he used to give me. I had an unhappy childhood and it affected me immensely in my early adult life with my relationships and how I expressed myself but I was fortunate to find my soul mate when I reached 50 albeit we were only together for 11 years before he passed away. You both clearly love each other so much and are so lucky to be able to talk in this way between yourselves. You are open with each other in a way not many couples can be and appreciate you sharing this with your followers. You guys are the most respected couple on RUclips!
Nadia,the security you feel in your relationship,and the trust that you have in the love mark feels for you is inspiring.
Wow guys, thanks so much for being brave enough to share. Mark you are an amazing guy (which Nadia totally sees and appreciates) and as much as I loved to hear your response and views I think the conversation got much deeper than needed. I think Nadia's wish to have more affection was just that, a wish. I'm sure she hoped by voicing this it would nudge you to think about it and maybe instigate it more. I never got the impression she was criticising you for not being affectionate. As an affectionate person she probably craves quite a lot of affection and therefore instigates it to get her fix. As you respond well to her being affectionate, you understandably feel you have a good amount of affection in your relationship and probably don't feel the need to instigate it much. Her wish was just that you might instigate it more. Like doing your fair share. Being affectionate to our partners is much more complex than with our children. No relationship has the perfect balance. So take the comments given by Nadia and try and increase the amount of affection you give her and enjoy her response. It's a win win! X
Thank you for being so brave as to share this. Nadia is so right when you say that if it hadnt been the podcast it may have ended up in a walking away or a row. Too often we all feel uncomfortable with our feelings and defense becomes anger. Sticking with it and Nadia ignoring Mark's rejection of the hug (sometimes ignoring somebody is absolutely the right thing to do) and then persuading Mark to carry on when he wanted to "run away and hide" got you both to where you needed to be. You are the epitome of soul mates. Thomas Moore described a soulmate as ’someone to whom we feel profoundly connected, as though the communication and communing that take place between us were not the product of intentional efforts, but rather a divine grace.’
I am sure that your honesty, bravery, grace, humour, intelligence and humility are going to help a lot of couples.
Difficult to watch. Difficult when one person is seen as the 'problem' in a relationship and the other isn't. Like any couple/person, you both have issues, not just Mark.
I was married to a dinker. It is hard to have a real realtionshiip. One is the one who has to make sure all is well.
Extremely unfair comment
You are a hero Mark. An absolute hero. 16 years of taking it hour by hour, day by day, without the drug that made life bearable for you...and all for the family whom you adore, which is possibly why the affection issue hit you so hard. I hope one day you can give the same amount of love to yourself that you give out to others. X
arlene jackson wow Arlene .. Nadia here .. thank you .. I will make sure mark hears this xxx
@arlene Jackson What a beautiful eloquent response.
Well, this made me cry a lot. I wish I could figure out how to change my name on RUclips so that I could post something about my experience with these types of discussions. I would post it in my own name, but I don’t know if that’s fair to other person that would have been involved in the examples I’d give. If anyone knows how to change a RUclips name, let me know!
Honestly, this video brought back so much for me, and though it was somewhat painful for me to watch (because though we’d come to many resolutions like the two of you just did there; with a realisation and a show of vulnerability and understanding, the relationship I had didn’t make it) but it was also so relatable and so human and I’m just so happy for you two and so happy that a relationship that I see, in some ways, as so similar to my past relationship, has survived and not only survived but is happy. I like to sometimes think that in a parallel universe somewhere; my one did too.
But anyway, onwards and upwards!
I've just fallen in love with Mark a little bit more ❤️ Also some of what you said at the end reminds me of Neville Goddard's concept of 'everyone is you pushed out' which is very interesting when it comes to the dynamics in a relationship/marriage.
Who needs all that Kardashian/ Jenner crap. We need more REAL people like you two. THANK YOU xxxx
Can I ask you both what you think to Piers Morgan’s comments on mental health and that people should just “toughen up”, personally I think it’s outrageous. Both you lovely people made me cry just now. Sending huge hugs to both ❤️❤️xx
Sean it sounds like you have had a lot to deal with in your life and you sound a very kind man. I agree that emotional resilience should be taught to young people in the same way that financial matters should. All tools for life. Your last comment re enforces what i believe. You have got through by not crying being strong and being quiet. Now would you tell a cancer patient to do the same? Mental illness is just like any other illness but you cant physically see it. (albeit i have seen it, in the eyes of my daughter). I wish you well Sean
I have so much respect for you both. I could see the anger build up in Mark in response to Nadia talking about affection, and thought it was really interesting, because a natural reaction to someone being angry is for the other person to back off and maybe without realising that was what Mark was trying to do as a self protection measure to prevent himself being vulnerable or the real reason why it upset him. It sounds strange but I saw a vulnerable hurt little boy. I can relate to Mark so much with the self loathing and anger towards myself and will do anything to prevent anyone accessing my emotions or being vulnerable in front of anyone as it scares me. There’s something really special about your relationship and the way you support and love each other. Massive respect and love to you xxx
Knew this was gonna be a hard watch as saw you talking about it so had to build myself up to watching it. My reason ..... I am the female version of Mark without he big words! Showing affection doesn’t come easy to me . Past childhood issues are definitely the root but my way to deal with it all is lock it in a box and throw away the key. Doesn’t always work that way. I struggle showing affection to anyone as well as my 3 children which I’m utterly ashamed of. I feel that I give lots of affection but the reality is it’s like I’ve got locked in syndrome .My feelings although they are in my head just can’t translate into reality. This podcast is soo relateable and you should both be so proud of yourselves..... I love watching you both and Mark is an absolute legend. His rawness and honesty with his struggles helps me more than he will ever now. Nadia you help me with your positivity and yearning to be the best mum and wife ever. You’ve made me want to get up in the morning and cook fresh healthy meals for my kids so the guilt is less likely to creep in later on when I just don’t have the energy and then have to deal with the guilt that I can’t feed my children on top of hugging them. Between you two you are slowly changing my habits and making me step back and think before I utter my mantra “It is what it is”...... Just for the record too I’m a highly privileged mum of 3 , with a nice life, nice car, holidays etc. This brings its own guilt in itself as I feel I have no right....... My husband of over 18 years is the most understanding man in the world and the male version of Nadia in temperament only. Lol. Keep doing what you’re doing. You are helping people more than you’ll ever know. You two rock!!!! Xxx
I've just watched this a year after everyone else and I feel kind of sad. You are 2 lovely people but I'm worried that your co-dependency has become too intense. Speaking from personal experience, it's dangerous to allow your partner to define who and what you are. It changes how you see yourself and ultimately you lose your real self in the confusion of the other person's idea of who you are. This is when it's important to take a substantial break to rediscover your real self and to work on your own identity without your partner's baggage being projected onto you and obstructing that. It's scary I know but I think you've both invented your own reality in your own bubble and it's hard for you both to see yourselves and each other with any real clarity unless you take a step back and work on your own demons alone. I'm 3 years out of a similar relationship and I feel I am still recovering and trying to unpick all the pre-conceptions I have of myself that I learned through my ex partner. Hope you both find the strength to help yourselves and ultimately each other in a more productive way.
Wow guys. I’m hiding in my bedroom with my partner downstairs cos we’re going through yet another rough patch, watching you 2 getting upset and wanting to shout at you that you are both and your relationship amazing and I’m incredibly envious. Stay close and look after what you have. Love you guys xx
Oh guys I so admire your honesty.. I'll try and keep this short. My husband and I have been married 38 years, we married in our teens and life was tough in the 80's a child, money, working and making ends meet. But all we ever argued about was him not being affectionate ( he was but not at the level I wanted) I was jealous of his affection towards the kids, my brain knew he loved me he showed me daily in his actions but I wanted "affection" fast forward 23 years and we split up for that very reason. Worse time of my life and his. I never really truly left him was always in love with him but angry that he couldn't show me the one thing I craved for so badly. Two years later we got back together but before we did I asked myself.. if I could live without the level of affection I thought I needed and Did I feel loved by him?. The answer was yes so I took the plunge and we've truly never been happier. I initiated affection most of the time and that's ok because I think it's hard for the guys as mark said to know when to be affectionate and to read our needs, and I don't think it's intentional. But as with you guys if we're away on holiday he's really affectionate. I put that down to not being at home, working, kids ( were foster carers) I guess what I'm saying is I could have lost the most wonderful person by not meeting him halfway and letting it go was the biggest relief for me and him 😂 I could go on but I just want to say keep doing what your doing guys and keeping it real thankyou xx
Don't ever apologise for what you put on here! You are both so inspiring in so many ways...from the lols in Cornwall to this video. You are so so real. Thank you for being you! X
So hard to watch, I feel for Mark and i worry that this isn't helpful to him when suffering with depression. Love to mark
Nadia has a right to her own feelings. It’s not all about Mark and his issues.
God Mark & Nadia I have watched this over & over so honest sad heartwarming a roller coaster of emotions opening up before my very eyes - thank you for that - your love for each other is both strong & fragile. You have wounds but between you both you have the need to heal & repair them - how awesome is that. Love to you both xx
This is such a great example of compassion and understanding the real issue... how sometimes its not anger... its feeling bad. Sometimes its not wanting to hurt... its a need... yet without the opportunity to look at it... it may have been simply overlooked... thanks to the not editing... you are showing what happens every day... and sometimes what breaks a relationship if we don't have a chance to stop and catch what is really going on. I have always said it... marriage is work. It takes work not to take for granted. It takes work to love beyond thinking you know everything about one another. What a great team you are. Thankyou.
I honestly don’t understand why Nadia did that. Mark you’re too smart to fall for it-you didn’t but again Nadia wants to remind you how much you loathe yourself sometimes and why? Coz she wants affection on her terms. Nadia it doesn’t work like that. Mark you are a decent man a real keeper and this also shows through your daughters too. You are right mark I think Nadia was a bit confused especially because you didn’t cave in- again we see this a lot especially needy women- I used to be like that until I asked myself why and not make it someone else’s problem. I’m much happier for it. I think that Mark doesn’t get mentally stimulated enough b nada I think Nadia is caring but needs to work on herself- kinda takes the talk but can’t walk the walk..
In defense of Nadia who I find a bit annoying at times! I don't think you can ever make these comments unless you live with an addict. All bets are off and you play a totally different game living with an addict. You don't have any choice and have to learn to adapt, and fuck, is it HARD to do.
h d yeah you have a point there but not everyone who has low self esteem is an addict. What would everyone be writing on here if Mark had reduced Nadia to tears because he ‘ just wants some affection. That’s all. Don’t go into detail’..... I think mark doesn’t realise just how ok he is I find Nadia has a lot to do on herself. she even used his intelligence against him. I had the same look on my face as Mark when she was talking.
@@soren509 I agree that living with an addict and asking them for more of anything can be a huge blow to them when they think they have been giving it their all. Of course we can only speculate because we see such a tiny window of their lives. Thank god! haha
h d that doesn’t apply to just addicts. If you watch the video mark explains what and why. Nadia doesn’t hear it. I think the worst bit was the lower mark started to feel the calmer Nadia became and saw some satisfaction in her face. She should sort it out with her mother and not blame mark maybe? If it was the other way round everyone would accuse mark of all sorts. Yea I suppose it’s a window but this ones a big one.
Mark I can't find the words to express just how much respect I have for you, thank you for sharing this, such a brave thing to do. Nadia you are the kindest most supportive person who I take inspiration from to try and be a better person. Love you both xx
Let me preface my comment by saying I adore your videos and think you are both amazing, however I found this difficult to watch. I felt that Nadia really didn’t listen to Mark, no matter how Mark tried Nadia wasn’t hearing Mark and kept telling him how he felt and why he felt it. Instead of it being “what I wish for our marriage” to me it came across as Nadia saying “What I want to change about Mark” which can sound like an attack. I think you’re amazing and have a phenomenal relationship, but this episode was uncomfortable for me to watch as I wanted to shout out “Nadia stop over talking Mark whenever he tried to describe how he felt”
Ditto!
Mark has already had his 3 wishes from Nadia!
Nadia, you are so right. It seems to be a universal problem in relationships. If men could learn that one thing - affection without expectation of sex- it could save an awful lot of relationships. This is a brilliant discussion.
Ita Browne thank you .. it was certainly gruelling ! I didn’t expect it to that way at all ! X
That’s exactly what made it so good. It should be part of training manual for therapists.
Ita Browne totally agree women are for venus men are from mars (our the otherway around)
Wow a very honest moving podcast thank you mark and Nadia xx we all need to work on our relationships to keep it healthy xxx
I only wish I could have these in depth conversations with my husband to understand each others feelings. Love you both.xx
Deborah Wales oh Deborah it’s so hard isn’t it . Honestly it’s not easy and we’ve been through so much to get here . We struggle like everyone else . But live gets us through x
So glad I found your channel, well done for showing how important it is to talk about your feelings! Xx
Total admiration and respect for airing this emotive conversation. If only more couples took the time to invest in their marriage by doing this type of thing !!!! It was so interesting that by continuing to discuss rather than let anger take over some of the real feelings and emotions were set free !!! Thanks for sharing and being so honest. Hope you enjoyed the real coffee afterwards 😀
Omg I’m in tears listening to this, you are both such endearing, lovable, relatable people I really tapped into this and Marks raw emotion 😓 Mark you are such a wonderful man, but don’t drive yourself too hard, you’ve obviously had so many hurdles to overcome and are an inspiration honestly to so many. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being organic and as we all are full of knots and knarls, like bumpy pieces of wood. I do think Nadia was only saying in her own way, how much she loves the affection so much she’d like a bit more of it, bit like only having half a pudding and wanting a bit more. It’s great how you hashed this out and in the end ended it with a loving hug though, proves communication is the God of everything. The love you have together is beautifully heartwarming, I’d love to write a book based on you, your both such fab multi faceted, fun and interesting people you’d make a fantastic read, moreover though thank you for this you are quite simply helping others....Mark you deserve a great coffee now lol 👍💕
Looby T
Don't forget to give yourself credit for how verbally affectionate/demonstrative you are, Mark. You say the most beautiful things to Nadia and I'm sure there are many here who wish their partners could be as unashamedly in love with them. Credit where it's due. X
Aww guys that made me cry 😢 Bless you Mark, you are so brave so show your emotions and be able to speak about them. I have been married for 8 years and together for 11, but my husband never feels he can open up to me. It's weird, but I know straight away when something is up because he tends to take his Upset, Anger, frustration or worry out on me. So I just stay quiet. Like when his close freind died in a horrific car accident, I was at my mums for the holidays and he just sudden became really awful to me, it was only sometime later I found out what had happened. Also he is very close to his parents (both late 70s) and if any one of them become ill and gets hospitalised, he becomes quiet and then really angry with me. It's the only way he can vent some emotion and I seem to be his emotional punch bag. I don't know how to help him and fear if they passed away he would be so bad it would probably cause massive a rift between us. Any suggestions?
Mark you are a real man . A man who can recognize what he needs to work on and can cry and love his wife the way you love Nadia. That is a real man . Nadia you are a Darling wife I see that in the vlogs both you made me cry as I was watching this . I don't know if you too pray but I believe in God and he is there for you he listens . And today he was proud of both of you to see that you too can talk out your issues . Continue to do this and God bless xx ❤️❤️
Jennifer Negron sending love back to you xxx
If more men showed how thay realy feel like u mark then more marriages would last fair play for showing us men it's not hard to show are feelings to are partners or misses thank u mark u are a good guy
Nadia, you're so right with the whole cuddle scenario between men and women and identifying what we each need/want. None of us are mind readers are we? I gave my sleeping husband a big cuddle after watching this ♥️♥️♥️ I mostly ask for cuddles, it's just the best way to get them when I really need them ! Xxx
Mark is an amazing man. He's so watchable and I learn so much from him. He is so generous in all ways. I can't say any more.
He is 🔥🔥 too lol. That accent.
Oh Mark, just want to give you the biggest hug ever. Good on you and Nadia for being so open and honest. 💗
I love your honesty to one another X my beloved husband passed away to cancer three years ago we were very honest with our relationship and were together 29 years he was the love of my life xx but he was a perfectionist and worked so hard I agree with Nadia about marks health stress is the worst for health X but it's good to be honest in a relationship as had as it's to swollow sometimes xx love to you both lovely couple XXX
Charlotte Jones 💙
That was a really moving conversation, thank you for sharing it
Yesterday you had me laughing at loud with your Cornwall vlog “pick it up!”... and today you have brought a tear to my eye. Your honest, open sharing is amazing and so relevant to all. I love the way that you make me think about these relevant topics. Your channel has a bit of everything, fun, family, relationships, gardening, cooking and travel. Well done & thank you
Jo mckenna 👏👏👏👏👏thank you thank !! This is what we want from our channel ! To entertain , to bring about debate , and to share in the wonder of the human condition !! ♥️♥️♥️
Mark, you are man goals. A beautiful, sensitive soul. Love you both. Xxx
I do believe those tears are a necessary part of healing Mark. You are a beautiful scorpio and your river runs deep 💚
Nadia I understand completely when you say about your mum loving you but not showing you any affection, mine was and still is exactly the same!! I am so glad you decided to post this vlog, your both such lovely people and been through so much but your love for each other shines through, had me in tears in end to see you both so upset love your vlogs so much ❤️xx
Awe bless...I don't think it's about being a "real man"..who decided that terminology anyway or a "real woman" to be aware and to show such honest and raw emotion to the world is real in my eyes. It's being human. Sometimes regarding showing affection has to be learned, everyone has their level of doable affection. It's plainly obvious that mark worships the ground you walk on. You are his universe..his lobster 😊
Every day is a learning process, we can't learn it all in one lifetime. Big hugs to both of you. Have a fantastic bank hol weekend and chill! xx
You’re both seen as authentic which is humbling. when you put out such truthfulness as videos like this it makes us all realize how normal & the same we all. Never hesitate or change. The world needs more of you!
I was so engrossed in this , absolutely so real and Mark I just wanted to hug you,but I do think you have taken it too much to heart 💔,, Nadia loves you so much ! She definitely didn’t want to upset you this much 😘😘
Another winner! I am and I’m sure many others are really benefiting from having you around to watch. I often hear myself saying to my husband Nadia and Mark said this and Nadia and Mark do this and it opens up great conversations. Thank you both again for being down to earth and relatable x 🙏
I so wish I had found these podcasts before my recent separation from my husband. It’s so helpful to see how other people’s relationships work and makes you see things from a different perspective. Thank you for being so open & honest, I’m sure it’s not easy to share so much of yourself online xx
Amazing video. You really are so brave laying your relationship bare for all to hear. Yes, it was painful to watch at times but my god you two work so well together and obviously have put in a lot of hard work. It’s clear.that you love and respect each other-no divorce for you two!! Thank-you Mark for sticking that one out, must have felt excruciating, but we women often see anger, defensiveness, even a sense of aggression where really there is fragility, fear and confusion. I feel you need a standing ovation for this one! xxx😘
This vlog is one of the most raw and touching things I’ve ever seen, I love watching all your content but the HTSM lets us look at your relationship unedited, and is a great help in how we can all sit and listen to each other more, even when it’s hard to hear. Thank you so much ❤️
Hello.
Nadia said. I wish you were more affectionate.
Mark is saying. I AM affectionate.
This is a big trigger area for you guys. Nadia feels she has a void in her life causing her pain. Mark feels to be seen as unaffectionate causes him pain.
What you must do Mark is feel the anger and resentment, the misinterpretation without saying anything to Nadia to justify your position when she is vocal with this.
* what does it mean to you Mark to be seen as a man/husband who is unaffectionate. Who in your life has been unaffectionate to you? Both, your mother and father? This is why you cant accept you could be unaffectionate.
* Nadia, Mark will never fill the void of the unaffection you felt as a child. Therefore, if he has a personality where he has moments of unaffection this is magnified by the void you feel. Nadia your feeling of loneliness in moments is real and should be acknowledged. The void you feel must be addressed with your mother not Mark. Here you will find true healing. You are stating classic " sound bites" of what you require.
From the outside Mark seems very affectionate, caring, considerate and putting his family before himself.He appears to be seeking physical connection a lot. You also are a very affection open person nadia.
However I feel there is a style of affection Nadia needs, which is the spontaneous "reaching out" of affection nadia wished her mother would do in the moment This would be difficult for another person to fill Nadia because it's a nuance that only your mother can provide.
What you have here in this very specific area is the opposite of codependancy. This is where couples cant meet each others needs because its trauma based and needs healed outside of the relationship.
You are both wonderful and loving and kind x
Stella Hypnotherapist as ever Stella we thank you so much for your insight and for sharing your skills with us . What you say rings very true xxx
Wow. Have been watching a lot of your podcasts recently and getting a bit obsessed. I thoroughly enjoyed your Cornish trip and thought at the time what a wonderfully spontaneous and affectionate couple you are. Laughing, joking and having a fun relaxed time. You have both obviously been through so much on your lives and marriage and during points of watching various podcasts have tried to put myself in your shoes and wondered whether my husband and I could cope with the filming and analysis of your relationship and the relationship we have with our daughters etc. Having watched this now I can honestly say that you are both incredibly inspirational people. Mark, I think to most woman you are a real Man with the ability to show your vulnerable side but also so many amazing strengths. To be able to be honest and open with each other and for all intents and purposes bring up issues that a lot of couples would probably try and leave in a dark cupboard is very brave. From watching your vlogs, I am sure many envy your relationships with parents, children and each other. I for one am taking so much from your vlogs, thank you, keep doing what your doing. ❤️
I can see how tough this was for you two. But it’s beautiful to see how you can go from intense feelings to opening back up and finding each other again. Their a so many couples who aren’t doing the spiritual work and would stay shit off to each other. All the love in the world to you xxx
Loved this video loads! So honest and relatable! It's so interesting being able to look from the outside in when I've been in the affection situation myself & struggled to see the man's point of view, was good to get perspective. When nadia and Mark were talking about wish 1 I could see it from both sides. I've been in nadias position before where it seems like all affections turns in to sex so I rejected all affections and wished for exactly what nadia is saying. On the other hand on the vlog the other day mark said that he went to find nadia in the house to be affectionate or do something nice and was battered away because he caught nadia in the wrong moment dying her hair. In them instances the tries of affection are missed. So many factors come in to play; timing, feelings, expectations. It's an absolute mine field for both parties sometimes!
Carly it sure as hell is !! Marriage takes work every single day xx
My God you two are amazing! This was beautiful,so raw and thankyou for posting this ,so relatable to me and my marriage too....Much love to you both
I love this. My marriage was pretty horrible, immature, full of lies... I dream to have an open, honest, communicative relationship like this one day. You remind me of my parents love ❤️. Thanks for being so open and honest.
You have a keeper Nadia and mark. Relationships are not always sunshine and roses, it was so emotional to watch you discuss things that were clearly hard. Sending love
Aw wow what an amazing video. I was sobbing in the bath (quite a strange sensation!). I see so much of myself in Mark. had a big old hoooha with my fella as he left earlier, when really I too was very hurt and upset. We are all human and we can all only try our best. Love your vids so much, just a little bit of bloody normal! Xx
I was 18 when i got married and am currently 21 so weve nearly been married for 3 years
I love watching your videos for all the wisdom it gives and to know that its okay to have disagreements sometimes
This shows how both parents are important to learn from. Mark didn't have a father to show him the example.
Wow guys!😱 Thank you for being so open about your marriage, some of your comments I can relate to myself & it really has hits home for me, so thank you for sharing this! Much love to you both!
Well done with this, this was so raw and strong 💗💗💗thank you both for ye're vulnerability, amazing.
I see where Nadia is coming from, ye were very affectionate in cornwall because ye were relaxed and having fun, (as in with alcohol down) but at home it's not as easy and straight forward cause of all the stresses and family. I think those of us with depression put on our suit of armour, keeping the people with love the most a little bit away to survive 💗💗💗
Oh Mark , your loveliest guy and the funniest guy .keep your chin up . Lots of love to you both xx
I’m female but I completely get what you are saying Mark and think you are spot on.
Just watched this with my hubby. Some of the things you said made us feel like a normal married couple. This is your best HTSM . Thank you for always being real.♥️
Michelle Nye thank YOU and your hubby too x
This made me feel sad. However, what's brilliant is the honesty between you. It's not easy, both working in creative - with all the vulnerabilities, insecurities and competitiveness that brings (I know) - let alone bearing your all with such insightfulness and exposing that to the public every day. I do hope this exploration is helpful for you both - as you appear to be very sensitive, loving people, in a strong partnership/friendship. We're all wired up differently, and we express our feelings and react to situations depending on our personal experiences growing up. You guys are polar opposites on so many levels, particularly as regards how you were shaped through adolescence/early adulthood. It's unsurprising therefore that you are sometimes conflicted, and need to work out your differences. Sending love and hugs to you and your family. All the best xxx
hitfrombehind thank you for sharing . Sending love back x
Oh dear! heartbreaking to see and hear you both struggling and yet thank goodness know what a fabulous marriage you have! Huge hugs to you both and may you both enjoy many more between yourselves!
Thank you so much for sharing this guys, the most real thing I’ve ever seen filmed. Blimey you reeled from disastrous to divine with us hanging on by our knuckles! It shows how much you love each other, I think, and how easy it is to misunderstand one another in amongst our busy and difficult lives. I’ve learned from this, I’m speaking as someone married to the most wonderful man for twenty years, but like everyone we’ve literally battled at times to make our marriage what it is xxxxx
Hi, I subbed to the channel a while back and this video came up as a suggestion. So glad I tapped it. This is really going to help me. ✨
love the relationship you have which each other ..... the love in both of your eyes is immense for each other anyone can see that, brilliant honest discussion and loved the fact u both see the conversation out n not walk away, well done guys i think u should have a slice or 2 of cake with that much deserved cuppa coffee xx
claire was lil cc think we might ! X
You are such a loving and open couple..... Be proud of yourselves that you are brave enough to be so honest and trust each other with your vulnerabilities.... Hugs and smiles for you both ...tripppppple expressos beckon lol......💛💚💜
Helene Bird ahhhh you’re so kind . Thank you Helene x
This is one of the most honest, real and raw vlogs Iv ever watched and I learnt SO much from it! You guys are honestly so refreshing to watch!
Mark, i see so much of my partner in you and it was so interesting to hear your side of things, so enlightening and has opened my eyes out to another side of things!
Thank you both for being so vulnerable! You are both truly lovely people!!x
This was so raw and emotional to watch. I do admire you both so much. Love and hugs to you both for keeping it real! 😘
Am so moved by this.
Thank you both for posting it.
You two usually make me laugh tonight you made me cry, marriage isn’t always easy, but if we keep talking to each other and listening as you’ve shown, we have the tools to stay married and to stay in love.
Xx
IM ON MARKS SIDE ON THIS,, NADIA EXPECTING TOO MUCH HE SHOWS AFFECTION ALL THE TIME ALL US WOMEN LWAYS WANT MORE THATS REAL LIFE AND HE IS RIGHT TO EXPLAIN AND DEFEND HOW HE FEELS .YOUR NIT PICKING AND MAKING OUT YOUR GOOD BUT NOT QUEIT GOOD ENOUGH ..THIS WOULD DRIVE ANYBODY TO SAY FK IT GO FOR THE BOTTLE .
Love you guys xx that was such a full circle of emotion and I’m so happy you put it out. I know it will of hit a cord for so many watchers. Love is everything, and a relationship is a journey and you are so conscious of each other’s feelings, speaking about them is everything. Thanks for the inspiration. Big hugs to you both xxx
Thank you so much for sharing. It was emotional. This is what relationships are, it's having these discussions with each other and getting through them that make a couple stronger. You two are the best! Sending hugs x
Well that escalated quickly guys, lol.
I think men and women often show affection in different ways.
This was an emotional one. Thank you for sharing your vulnerable and personal moments with us. X
Wow!!! What a brilliant video, you two are amazing, can so relate to your comments,love you guys so much xx, keep doing what your doing xx
That was a hard one to watch but so real. If only we could see in ourselves what others see in us. Mark you are so special and hopefully one day you will believe it. Love watching the bond between you both, in it together for life. xx
My admiration for you Mark in showing your vulnerability is boundless. My partner and I are in our 60's and both feel the need to show affection to each other which is something that wasn't common in our parent's generation. Opening up about feelings can be scary but it is well worth it.