@@blood-water If you said also then you don't need to say too. Too means also or excessive amount of something. You either say, "You look red too," or, "You also look red."
BitLife: “you got your first period” Bijuu bike: “oh OHHHHH I think that’s new” Last BitLife video he did before mystery update: “you got your first period” Me: “THATS NOT NEW, that has been in the game for like a couple months now”
@@darktheloser lol thx, for some reason tho I feel like it’s kinda fallen on a bad day, like idk why but on September 5 everything is like closed ether closed or not the best time like I wanted to see a movie with a friend but every movie that was playing was trash like *COME ON* XD
I have a BitLife challenge ☝🏻 The Sheldon Cooper challenge Rules; 1. Have 95-100 smarts 2. Study physics in university 3. Job has to be science related 4. No animals or drivers license 5. Only aloud 1 girl friend / wife no children 6. Live a long full life and get a job achievement for any job involving science
4:49 yeah, i did the same thing when i was younger 😂. i was in cvs with my mom and i forgot i was holding a pen that said “brian” on it and i accidentally walked out with it 😂😂
Hey, bijuu Mike! I have a challenge for you! The 100 challenge! 1. Keep you're health to 100 until you die 2.Also keep you're looks up to 100 until you die 3.again, keep you're smarts up to 100 till you die 4.and then keep you're happiness to 100 till you die 5.be a good person 6.if you get married, have at least 3 kids and spend a lot of time with them 7.agree to everything but drug related or alcohol 8.You have to get a pet 9.spend time with you're siblings and your parents 10.attend all funerals 11. Don't kill anyone or go to jail 12. Don't cheat unless you're broken up with your current boyfriend
@Bijuu Mike do you still do BitLife challenges? If so then I have an idea for you Here: Challenge Name: Adarlans Assassin Main Objective: Become a very famous assassin Location: Australia, Adarlan. (Make a custom city called adarlan) Character Name: Aelin Galathynius Gender/Sex: Female What you do: ages 1-5: act like a princess and be very kind. Ages 6-16: Start being more wild as you start becoming an assassin. Ages 17-25: have 2 one night stands, settle in with someone, and kill people to go to jail. Ages 26-27: escape prison. Ages 28-34: Have a child, get a name change to Celaena Sardothien, get a job if you don't have one, and get a house and a car if you don't have one. Ages 35+: Just live your life how you want! Everybody that reads this please like so Bijuu Mike can see 😊🤞
Hey Mike! There's a game called 'Faith' and it's really cool, I think you would like it! It's sort of a scary game but I think you should check it out, I believe you will enjoy it!! (Ps. It has multiple endings too 👀)
9:46 Actually, in Ancient Greece, they had energy drinks made from manure. Typically men would drink it before participating in chariot races, arena competitions, and the Olympics. I’m not kidding, when I say that energy drinks in Ancient Greece were crap I’m not kidding. They were actual manure. Don’t ask how it gave them energy because I honestly don’t know.
BitLife does have problems. I was playing BitLife and then I reported a student who wrote bad word stuff on the school board to the principal. Apparently after it said “Your classmate, Jim attacked you with A GUIDED MISSILE!” And then it said “ the guided missile blew up your fist and you die from it.” BitLife can get crazy at times. And this happened when I was 9
Challenge Idea: The clingy lover challenge. Rules: You have to live your best life. Always do plastic surgery if your looks are down. If a guy or girl asks you out at a young age, accept, or ask them out yourself. If your husband or wife cheats on you, keep forgiving. Take your lover to the movies, spend time with them, talk with them, etc. If your lover breaks up with you, keep begging them to stay, if they dump you, just message them or stalk them. Sorry if there are too many rules, hope you can do this challenge.
Me playing bit life on my 3rd life: *gets cancer of the skin and dies at age 5* of course I'm gonna get cancer IF I AM A CANCER Ok who's gonna reply (edit 1)
No one :
People that play bitlife : Wh- Why do I have responsible parents??
Literally me when I play it
I don’t get it...
@@thatwasimpossiblethoucanno976 2:40
😂
@Kiera Niska Ohoho. I see you are a true man of culture as well.
"Hey my Bits, Hey my Bit Boys."
Hey *Bit Mike*
today’s scrub of the day goes toooo (you it should be you)
xxAlex then your a bitch :D
@@blue13.07 no it's me dummy
@@rootlebugsnax it's not you it's David mom
Fortnite Hacker
Davids mom*
David's mom: *Sees thumbnail* I'm about to end this man's whole career.
finds adderss grabs demonteszashin nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Lol
XD
Lol true tho
@@alvahvee I SEE YOU WITH THE SASHA PFP
me: * sees title *
also me: Ah, he finally understands.
「Lais Lies」 lol
Yeah lol
David's mom?
What
Haha lol your right though
"Hey, my *bits.* Hey my *bit boys."*
*Bruh.*
*BRUH MOMENT BRUUUUUUH*
but imma gorl.
nvm i got nu gender.
@@waylontggwaylonthegoodgamer yes
I am a girl
*laughs in girl*
Are we just not going to talk about how the mom was breastfeeding a 5 year old
Yeevee Are we gonna talk about the fact my dad was drinking my breast milk a lot when I was one (in BitLife)
Sketchy_d00d I’m glad you added the (in BitLife) at the end
Exactly. XD Boy needs to grow up.
@@solar_dragon w h a t?!
@@solar_dragon why did you need to specify that it was in bitlife? Is everything ok? You alright there?
Nobody:
Beat Your Bike: “What did you say you little bit?”/“My bearants-“
Lmfao
???
Confused
BEAT YOUR BIKE-
r/boneappletea
David’s mom: I will never play bitlife
David: You can play as Bijuu Mike and ruin his life
David’s mom: *instant download*
*had us there in the first half, not gonna lie*
Who's david
@@yourdemisexualqueen9134 ....
Kristal Dunnington ;-;,are you new here?😮🤔
@@xoxojonelee no,I just dont know who this David kid is
ah yes
Alabama indeed
Dawn Draws congrats, child, for getting a heart 👌
Dawn Draws DO NOT EDIT YOUR COMMENT
@@cringetbh6467 I won't lol
More like the middle east or Africa, since those are the only places incest is legal......
@@EighmyLupin whoooosh
*sees thumbnail *
*we ain’t in Kansas anymore*
we are in SWEET HOME ALABAMA
lisa hennig has the wicked witch casted a curse?!
Amy Mitchell probably
lisa hennig how can I stop her!
Me, a kansan: Y'all stalkin me.
Bijuu: “Weird things happen in BitLife, let’s just say”
Me: “Yeah... let’s just say that-“ 😏
Gacha_ Charmy
O_O💦💦💦
That id norma... Oohhhhhhhhhh also youtube is being THANOS SNAPPED
ROFL!
sonyab1974 on ne
oh nooooooo
Bijuu Mike: " Kids aren't supposed to play with scissors."
Me: Good thing I'm not a kid.
I feel you I just ran around chasing my niece with scissors (I'm 24 ) I might just go to hell for that ,Mh GOOD
@Life of Kirsten oop-
Good Thing I'm a Kid.
Life of Kirsten HWWHHWHWWHAHGAFAUAHAYSUSHSHSGAHAAU
wait-
(the fanfic reader in me is yelling 'self harm')
*sees thumbnail*
Me: we have entered Alabama territory now
I thought it said al-im-ba-da
How well do I know my country :,>
@@sans5548 alabama is a state
@@cat-nx7sv Purplekittybanan nothin is probably talking about how well she knows the U.S. that or else she made a mistake
Challenge of BitLife: What ever the zodiac sign is of the person, You have to act it
Same :3
Yes
Aaaaaaquuuuuaaaaaarrrrrriiiiiiuuuuuusssss ♒
I actuallty just thought of doing that
I act like my zodiac sign already irl. I’m a Scorpio I’m pretty mean if you cross me but loyal to my stupid best friends xD
AYYYEEEEE BITS
*-mike 2019*
Me, playing BitLife: let’s start a new like
Game: age up
BitLife: age 1; my dad has been drinking my breast milk a lot lately
Lmaoooo whyyy
*dark humour be like:*
Wut da fuq?
*c o n c e r n*
💀💀💀
"wHy Am I sO rEd?!"*triggered sound thing kind of*
Bijuu mike 2019 ~
You also look red too.
@@blood-water If you said also then you don't need to say too. Too means also or excessive amount of something. You either say, "You look red too," or, "You also look red."
“Was she planned?”
*BitLife doesn’t even know anymore-*
nobody:
the thumbnail: *SWEET HOME ALABAMA*
This is will become famous
@@beariix8405 maybe lmao
@@woofbark5678 well look at your comment now! >:3
Me: *sees thumbnail*
Also me: -sWeEt hOmE aLaBaMa-
『 Møčhīī 』 omg yes 😂
Yes, I legit SCREAMED that when I saw the thumbnail 🤣
@@zie0619 LOL 😂
I live in Alabama and I can confirm.
@memelashoto ??????
Bijuu: I stole a candybar when i was younger
Davids mom: calls police
CheriNeko lol
Eddie is looking for you...
"Bitlife has got some problems"
The first 20 seconds of the video: *exist*
Kanekoya You have 20 likes
"Bubonic plague? That doesn't sound good."
Me: maybe because thats also known as the Black Death?
BitLife: “you got your first period”
Bijuu bike: “oh OHHHHH I think that’s new”
Last BitLife video he did before mystery update: “you got your first period”
Me: “THATS NOT NEW, that has been in the game for like a couple months now”
No one:
Bijuu Mike: “Just pull your bobs out whenever you want”
Big monwz
Bijuu Mike: My mother is a trucker
Me: mOtHeRtRuCkEr DuDe
ThAt HuRt LiKe A bUtTcHeEk On A sTiCk
... I'm sorry, I had to...
@@buttercuupjpg I WAS GONNA DO THAT :(
@@susanmclean5105 aw I'm sorry ❤
@@buttercuupjpg
Watch your profanity!
I love how a 0 year old can write in a diary.
I’m a Filipino and watching this melts my heart idk why
“Weird things happened in BitLife”
*Bijuu:* Let's get back to our life
*Me:* What life
Ha, same
“I will go reap our Kate”
-RUclips captions 2019
When the child is 5 years old, then it's weird. Up to the sitting up stage and lower is fine
*Sees title* bUgGgGgSsSsSsSsSSsSsss
Mike: Like I guess someone breastfeeding in public is a little strange.
Me: I think it's because the woman was breastfeeding a five year old, Mike.
1:52
September 13 is my birthday also lol
Mine is on the 5th of September, AGH SO CLOSE XD
@@waylontggwaylonthegoodgamer thats cool ☺
@@darktheloser lol thx, for some reason tho I feel like it’s kinda fallen on a bad day, like idk why but on September 5 everything is like closed ether closed or not the best time like I wanted to see a movie with a friend but every movie that was playing was trash like *COME ON* XD
Ok
I thought the “homeopathic doctor” said “homophobic doctor”
*sad gay from noises* (dad’s account ôwó)
I have a BitLife challenge ☝🏻
The Sheldon Cooper challenge
Rules;
1. Have 95-100 smarts
2. Study physics in university
3. Job has to be science related
4. No animals or drivers license
5. Only aloud 1 girl friend / wife no children
6. Live a long full life and get a job achievement for any job involving science
"Bitlife is an educational game, I tells you."
😂😂😂😂😂👌👌👌👌
David's mom: "Ah yes, FINALLY, some good heccing content."
mEoW MeOw I need kittens for life lol
I guess Bitlife has BIT the dusty life, also awesome video, and I got a bad caugh as well, in fact i have a cold.
You need to come up with a name for BitLife-
Like the one you did for “Yan-Jerry-Simulator”😏
Hit wife
Kicks knife
Hit knife
Gacha_ Charmy yandere sim!Ayano Aishi (yan chan) is my fave character
Git Wife or Git Life
6:57
Bijuu Mike: Rejects The Boy
Boy: I Am A Witch Doctor I Shall Curse You With The Bubonic Plague
"that coughs goin around, Makin me say weird things"
Bijuumike 2019~
Nobody:
Still Nobody:
Not even David’s mom:
Bijju Mike: lookie that Sayori action shot
**Sees thumbnail**
**Facepalm**
Bijuu.. Mijuu Bike... why..
I have to ban you from my Christian Minecraft server.. why Bijuu?!
Finally an incestophobic like me
Me: -sees thumbnail-
Also me: he finally understands.
Me: *Sees thumbnail*
Also Me: Welp, Dis vid is Messed up
6:28
**cough cough** (belle dalphine) **cough cough**
Me: *reads title*
Me again: isn’t it always?
3:11 that’s O D D I just got back from Manila after 2 weeks and a 12 to 14 hour flight home 😭 and shed a lot of tears
When you think you have seen the end of davids mom: Your sister moved out? okay, your sister juila is pregnant..... WITH YOUR BABY???? COME HER BOI
Me: *Sees notification* Oh yay Bijuu Mike posted!
Also me: *Sees thumbnail* ...My name is Julia... *Closes computer* THATS ENOUGH RUclips FOR TODAY!
I'm getting your notifications now!
“You’re tearing me apart, Lisa!”
Lol it’s from “the room” if you didn’t know. Haha
Did your taxidermied dad scare your friend that was hoarding those weapons
Bijuu: “Bitlife has got some problems.”
Me: ahh, *he finally gets it*
The beginning scared me 😂😂
5:25
Bijuu Mike: Why? Why you leave me? ;-;
Me: Why you bully me? ;-;
“Hey my bit boys”x1000
4:49 yeah, i did the same thing when i was younger 😂. i was in cvs with my mom and i forgot i was holding a pen that said “brian” on it and i accidentally walked out with it 😂😂
Julia is pregnant with your baby!
Me: * coughs in insest*
I BE LIKE DAMNNNNNN
Like damnnnnn
Maybe his girlfriend name was Julia too? Idk
Meagan Camara incest haha
Freak nobody loves you!!!! You are a mistake! Why did god make you?
3:30 *WOW* I have not seen that song in *years* 😂😂😂
I was reading something on my phone and I was omg where’s my phone and I spent like 20 minutes looking for it
As a mother trust me skipping a feeding will hurt and cause a bigger mess. But at 5 the child should generally be weened.
Me when seeing title:
*SWEET HOME A L A B A M A*
4:36 , that's relatable.
The game:Women selling their dirty bath water
Me: omg Belle Delphine is that you???
5:40 that was in the game before but it was just rare to get that
I was actually playing bit life when I got this notification 😂
Same
That drawing is spectacular omg
Title: BitLife has got some problems....
Me: *you haven’t noticed?*
David’s mom:
*GASP*
13:35
mike: BeSt FrIeNdS fOrEvEr
me: GIVE ME ALL YOUR WEAPONS EDNA I HAVE SOME PEOPE TO DEAL WITH
I edited the comment so the replies make no sense.
「 AikoPotato 」 10 actually 🙃
Omg same
IKR like who would dislike a vid like this, chances are if you’re watching it you’re a fan of this kind of content
12 nigga
Now 22!
Hey, bijuu Mike! I have a challenge for you!
The 100 challenge!
1. Keep you're health to 100 until you die
2.Also keep you're looks up to 100 until you die
3.again, keep you're smarts up to 100 till you die
4.and then keep you're happiness to 100 till you die
5.be a good person
6.if you get married, have at least 3 kids and spend a lot of time with them
7.agree to everything but drug related or alcohol
8.You have to get a pet
9.spend time with you're siblings and your parents
10.attend all funerals
11. Don't kill anyone or go to jail
12. Don't cheat unless you're broken up with your current boyfriend
I've got some problems too
I like how he doesn't realize it's a *5 year old child* not an infant at 6:45
“bye-joo-ooh mike is my least favorite person” 😂😂
@Bijuu Mike do you still do BitLife challenges?
If so then I have an idea for you
Here:
Challenge Name: Adarlans Assassin
Main Objective: Become a very famous assassin
Location: Australia, Adarlan. (Make a custom city called adarlan)
Character Name: Aelin Galathynius
Gender/Sex: Female
What you do: ages 1-5: act like a princess and be very kind. Ages 6-16: Start being more wild as you start becoming an assassin.
Ages 17-25: have 2 one night stands, settle in with someone, and kill people to go to jail. Ages 26-27: escape prison. Ages 28-34: Have a child, get a name change to Celaena Sardothien, get a job if you don't have one, and get a house and a car if you don't have one.
Ages 35+: Just live your life how you want!
Everybody that reads this please like so Bijuu Mike can see 😊🤞
when the homestucks hear that mike taxidermied his dad
Hey Mike! There's a game called 'Faith' and it's really cool, I think you would like it! It's sort of a scary game but I think you should check it out, I believe you will enjoy it!! (Ps. It has multiple endings too 👀)
THIS IS WERID BUT I LOVE IT!!!!♥♥♥
9:46 Actually, in Ancient Greece, they had energy drinks made from manure. Typically men would drink it before participating in chariot races, arena competitions, and the Olympics. I’m not kidding, when I say that energy drinks in Ancient Greece were crap I’m not kidding. They were actual manure. Don’t ask how it gave them energy because I honestly don’t know.
“Give me some tickets”
Me: *Wanna go with me? I’m going there soon. (Manila)*
How to get scrub of the day in 3 easy steps!
1. Be lucky.
2. Be super lucky.
3. Be the luckiest person ever.
Hey,I'm laughing so fricking hard and can i have a h*ck pass I don't have one so I can't say he*k
U sHaLl HaVe A He*K PaSs
I will giva away 1 of my 2 h**c passea two ywou
Yesss I can say HECK mow I have 3 H**k passes
1:53 I was soooo scared u were gonna say something rude but when you didn’t I literally subscribed 😂
Mine said once that “My dad keeps on drinking my breast milk” as I was a baby O_o
BitLife does have problems.
I was playing BitLife and then I reported a student who wrote bad word stuff on the school board to the principal.
Apparently after it said
“Your classmate, Jim attacked you with A GUIDED MISSILE!” And then it said “ the guided missile blew up your fist and you die from it.” BitLife can get crazy at times. And this happened when I was 9
I’ve gotten the period thing almost every time I’ve been a girl in BitLife for the past few moths I’ve been playing so... idk lol
8:51 for some reason i laughed at that one a lot LOL
*sees thumbnail*
My name is literally Julia-
😖😖😖😖😖
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ow
Aww man
But... Do you have a little brother...?
Challenge Idea:
The clingy lover challenge.
Rules:
You have to live your best life.
Always do plastic surgery if your looks are down.
If a guy or girl asks you out at a young age, accept, or ask them out yourself.
If your husband or wife cheats on you, keep forgiving.
Take your lover to the movies, spend time with them, talk with them, etc.
If your lover breaks up with you, keep begging them to stay, if they dump you, just message them or stalk them.
Sorry if there are too many rules, hope you can do this challenge.
Me playing bit life on my 3rd life: *gets cancer of the skin and dies at age 5* of course I'm gonna get cancer IF I AM A CANCER
Ok who's gonna reply (edit 1)
4:45 I did that when I was younger with a candle and have had nightmares ever since
36 seconds ago! 🤣
You should check out all of the new school features maybe even do a mean girls Challenge
"Is someone gonna taxidermy me now"
-Bijuu mike
*People who park in two spots deserve papercuts*
_No they should step on legos_
Bijuu Mike: Bitlife has some problems
Me: dAvIdS mOm
*Mike* when u play *bitlife* we not scrubs WE *BITSSSS* just *bits* lol