Tim should open a strip club called the spider room. Have the girls behind plexiglass like the hard plastic boxes spiders are stored in. Plenty of cockroaches would come and feed the spiders
24:16 Probably one of the funniest Tim Dillon moments of all time with the context He starts with talking about wanting to adopt a puppy and ends up here
yeah bro tell that to the Hapsburgs. "Genetic Purity" is a total meme told by people with no success of their own so they cling to the success of "their race"
Korean Jindo- the best dog i ever had. Super smart, loyal, kill skunks raccoons etc. He was my brother. So much energy, but had the best manners. Medium sized rescue. Doesn't like teenagers though. Liked to chill with coyotes. He would give his life to protect me.RIP Bruce
I never quit a job lol.....fired yes. I quit the shelter after 5 days. That shit will literally drive you insane. Literally thousands of poor fucking dogs barking. At the very back, one of my old dogs. He recognized me lol, not funny but I was 18. Worst fucking job ever. My best friends parents went nuts fucking running a non-profit dog shelter. It was so bad it's the only job I'd accept fraud in lmao. Like take the FUCKING DONATIONS and put em in your pocket if you run that bs. It's that bad
Purchasing a dog from a shelter is just like going to an asylum and saying "ooooooooooo, i like that one" only to take it home and find out its another Jeffrey Dahmer
This is the most accurate depiction of adopting from a shelter or rescue. I rescued a jack Russell 2 years ago and we ended up naming her Regan after the character in The Excorsist
I used to hate doing reports in school so I’d always pick something that might bother someone. Like Vlad the Imapler when they wouldn’t let me do Hitler, and this when it was about animals. At least until around the 6th grade when I learned I could graduate without doing the work and my report cards didn’t really go on any permanent record.
Tim , we breed Great Danes , pure breed , bred for temperament and baby killing champions are in their lineage . Don’t live long , 7-9 years . Perfect pet 👍 Early September they will be ready to take out small toddlers, Money back guaranteed !
Umm, quick question, are they a good choice for keeping "urban" kids away from my property, you know, the ones with the really low IQ and violence issues?
I was brought up with my dad being terrified of snakes. Until I was in my 20’s every snake was bad. I got into watching snake videos on RUclips and now I want a python or something. Nothing venomous but I want a snake that can bite the shit out of me and put some excitement in my life. Anyone can have a garter snake or a corn snake and nothing happens, I want an African rock python. The best thing is snakes are lower maintenance than dogs. Tend to their cage once a week, feed them like once a week and your good, you can go on vacation and leave your snake home and it will be perfectly fine.
This whole bit was so funny but you 100% know at least one person out there took this unironically and now has a vendetta against random beagles at shelters
Close all animal shelters, give all homeless dogs to homeless people, the laid off shelter employees make videos of the homeless people with their dogs, their channels grow, and the homeless people now make enough ad revenue to afford homes. Boom, that solves two problems.
tim is so amazing in every way, even when hes being funny or gross or sarcastic or silly or goofy or serious or trolling, if i was joe rogan, i would buy tim dillon a house, and the nicest car, on one condition. he would have to come to joe rogans comedy club, whenever he calls, sort of like a king who summons his best warriors to his side in times of need. sounds fair to me
8:20 This is so fucking true, I was almost dead set on getting a rosy boa snake and didn't see a problem at all with buying dead frozen mice and putting them in my freezer. Never had I considered some shit like that otherwise lmao
Went to a shelter and noticed a literal bucket full of used needles and vials, with the drugs and fresh needles on the table beside it, wanted to steal it all and run off
When people say things like “largest such and such in the world”, I wish they would say instead “largest known spider” or such n such. Because every single title sized animal carrys the title until something bigger or older or better comes to light. This is the largest know species of spider but people have testified to larger spider in Vietnam for instance. Largest known spider. Smartest known person. Oldest known tree. Dumbest known human. Highest known altitude. Loudest known sound. Longest known jump. Dumbest known president. Richest known family. Oldest known fossil.
My neighbor was bit by one in Cupertink when I was kid .she was bit in ass too. She was very trashy lady and wanted to show 9yr old me. Brown recluses are definitely in california even though they are not from here
Purebreds live the length of life of their breed. If purchased from a good breeder they're very healthy. There isn't a downside as long as you get the breed that's right for your lifestyle and needs AND you're willing to take care of them. Dillon should NEVER get any kind of dog 😂 Edit: and no kill shelters ALSO kill their animals...by shipping them off to kill shelters.
Supporting the animal shelters is supporting puppy mills and ppl who dont fix their pets. Buying pure breds is ensuring happy and healthy dogs and only responsible ppl will adopt. Im tired of getting looks when i tell ppl i bought my dog from a breeder 🙄
I adopted a french bourdeaux/pitbull mix. The woman who fostered him abused the fuck out of him. Took 2 full yrs to get him better. Now hes the best dog ever. But yeahyou gotta know if your capable of actually owning and rehabing a foster animal. Good on you tim.
I bred purebred dogs. I bred dogs that have won at Westminster. Never made one penny profit. Find an ethical breeder who cares about temperament & does health screens. "Adopting" is just another virtue signal.
My coworker is a world class breeder. Extremely well known as a breeder and trainer. Passionate about what he does and also makes good money. Those things are not mutually exclusive.
People who want to make money and be higher up on the social hierarchy are the problem. Animal shelters, governments, non profits are all run by people trying to make more money and be better than their neighbors. People aren’t producing much good in the world when their concerns are money and social hierarchy.
I hate animal shelters those animals deserve homes but if places like Greene county animal control & humane society of greater Dayton are going to deny me because i don't live up to their standards then they don' deserve my business.
It is his real voice.. he sounded different years ago this is true but over time he trained himself to have a deeper voice. Both types of voices displayed are his.
@@benjaminreyes3624 Benjamin...........have you ever met Tim Dillon? Did you go to high school together? Please do tell how you are so informed on this topic.
People find this insufferable ranting entertaining? How is this guy popular? People keep saying hes a comedian but ive been waiting 20 minutes for a joke... nothing.
The idea of only getting rescues is morally placing dogs on the same level as humans. Its not that I am against sentimentality, but doing this is literal sin. You aren't glorifying the lives of dogs, you are unglorifying human life.
Why does Ben have so much problem with communicating… getting words out? He’s obviously not as Intelligent as u Tim, but hes SOOOOO BORING when ever u try to have a conversation with him! His laugh is interesting l/ intertwining but I wish he could actually have something interesting to say about things u are talking about??? He seems abused by his parents
@@michelebergman4336 it’s part of the show. Ben is perfect for it. He has that nervous energy with good support laughs, wouldn’t be the same replacing him it’d have to be Tim solo.
So when looking for a roommate your ideal place to look would be a prison? Or an insane asylum cuz those are both applicable comparisons to a dog shelter
Stop pretending like puppies don't end up at shelters dude. To cast a dog out because of where it was born is stupid. More dogs for the rest of us@@carlosalejandre1000
Giveaway winner will be posted in a couple days!
You're just a content stealer
Who likes their own comments
fuckk that hate in the comments youre the best
@@JimmyGotRustled nah i just appreciate he’s uploading great content
Hi can I still enter the giveaway?
Bape Hoodie Tim Dillon is one of my favorite transformations of his
lmfao the first thing i noticed😂😂😂
There is no one as creative as Tim Dillon when choosing groups to troll. Genius
Loved to see him troll some lazy bones on cart narcs.
There is no one who has a worse sense of humour than tim dillon fans, they actually think hes a good troll or something
So you just go around watching clips of a comedian you clearly dislike and reply to fans? Weird habit but I guess you do you lmao
Tim’s outfits in the thumbnail make it so easy to find the original episode
Cool dude, congrats
So does the episode number in the description
Tim is the only one with the guys to take on the dog shelter industrial complex
Tim: “I’m bringing this dog back he’s an absolute menace!”
Shelter: “Oh goodness! What did it do?!”
Time: “It barked”
You ruined the punchline
"Who does that?" people who couldn't even make it to be cops
Tim should open a strip club called the spider room. Have the girls behind plexiglass like the hard plastic boxes spiders are stored in. Plenty of cockroaches would come and feed the spiders
Ohh I just got the joke ;)
24:16 Probably one of the funniest Tim Dillon moments of all time with the context
He starts with talking about wanting to adopt a puppy and ends up here
I really love the idea of that spider on the table still
Theres literally NOTHING more important than genetic purity.
yeah bro tell that to the Hapsburgs. "Genetic Purity" is a total meme told by people with no success of their own so they cling to the success of "their race"
How so?
@@mrscruffles801 Because bad genetics leads to poor health and lower quality of life.
Sounds like an old german euphomism
@@enterpassword3313literally science
Tim Dillon is if foghorn leghorn became a person
"It's beastiality... Indeed". 🤣
23:04
Korean Jindo- the best dog i ever had. Super smart, loyal, kill skunks raccoons etc. He was my brother. So much energy, but had the best manners. Medium sized rescue. Doesn't like teenagers though. Liked to chill with coyotes. He would give his life to protect me.RIP Bruce
I have a black belt on Korean Jindo.
@@krazyzyko *Lmao*
that's an _Oldie, but Goodie._
Lu😊8ii
Lu😊8ii
Lu😊8ii
The amount of times I just burst out dying here holy fuck
I love at 10:52 Ben obviously cares about animals but he’s trying to hide from laughing because he knows what’s coming 🤣🤣
I worked in an animal shelter one summer: doggy jail. Cleaned up after them with long-handled brushes and high pressure hoses. Worst job ever.
I never quit a job lol.....fired yes. I quit the shelter after 5 days. That shit will literally drive you insane. Literally thousands of poor fucking dogs barking. At the very back, one of my old dogs. He recognized me lol, not funny but I was 18. Worst fucking job ever. My best friends parents went nuts fucking running a non-profit dog shelter. It was so bad it's the only job I'd accept fraud in lmao. Like take the FUCKING DONATIONS and put em in your pocket if you run that bs. It's that bad
Doggy jail >.
was it "the humane society"?
just found this guy hes hilarious big ups
Im 10 minutes and am still waiting for the funny part. Is this like charity? They gave this disabled guy a microphone or something? Dont laugh at that
Lol
The watch has more personality than Lex
Lex is a god damn robot. Didn’t know him and Toe Rogaine were so close
his real name is alexi
I identify as a spider voyeur.
I wouldn’t go to a homeless shelter to find someone to live with. Why the fuck would I do it for a dog?
??what lol, Are you saying dogs can navigate society like they're humans?
@@itchscratch no, thats not it
Bro is out here meeting dogs on Tinder
Purchasing a dog from a shelter is just like going to an asylum and saying "ooooooooooo, i like that one" only to take it home and find out its another Jeffrey Dahmer
This is the most accurate depiction of adopting from a shelter or rescue. I rescued a jack Russell 2 years ago and we ended up naming her Regan after the character in The Excorsist
I have a shelter dog and I’m a nurse at an asylum. Yes!
Sounds like online dating 😂
I used to hate doing reports in school so I’d always pick something that might bother someone. Like Vlad the Imapler when they wouldn’t let me do Hitler, and this when it was about animals. At least until around the 6th grade when I learned I could graduate without doing the work and my report cards didn’t really go on any permanent record.
Tim , we breed Great Danes , pure breed , bred for temperament and baby killing champions are in their lineage . Don’t live long , 7-9 years . Perfect pet 👍
Early September they will be ready to take out small toddlers, Money back guaranteed !
I hope they get heart problems
Umm, quick question, are they a good choice for keeping "urban" kids away from my property, you know, the ones with the really low IQ and violence issues?
“You have a three legged dog, how old is it?”😂😂😂
Love Tim he see's the real world
Haaaha hes an obnoxious clown, apparently hes a comedian? Where is the funny part?
I woke up with a huge centipede in my bed a few weeks ago. Fear those more than spiders now.
I'm terrified
BTW I think they eat spiders
@@jaimlawson yes. It tried to eat me too haha. Well it bit me several times anyway
I was brought up with my dad being terrified of snakes. Until I was in my 20’s every snake was bad. I got into watching snake videos on RUclips and now I want a python or something.
Nothing venomous but I want a snake that can bite the shit out of me and put some excitement in my life. Anyone can have a garter snake or a corn snake and nothing happens, I want an African rock python. The best thing is snakes are lower maintenance than dogs. Tend to their cage once a week, feed them like once a week and your good, you can go on vacation and leave your snake home and it will be perfectly fine.
Sounds like an excellent home defense as well when you’re away.
This whole bit was so funny but you 100% know at least one person out there took this unironically and now has a vendetta against random beagles at shelters
Close all animal shelters, give all homeless dogs to homeless people, the laid off shelter employees make videos of the homeless people with their dogs, their channels grow, and the homeless people now make enough ad revenue to afford homes. Boom, that solves two problems.
Nice idea 💡
tim is so amazing in every way, even when hes being funny or gross or sarcastic or silly or goofy or serious or trolling, if i was joe rogan, i would buy tim dillon a house, and the nicest car, on one condition. he would have to come to joe rogans comedy club, whenever he calls, sort of like a king who summons his best warriors to his side in times of need. sounds fair to me
Bro hell yeah
Gay
Tim is already rich, he doesn't need any help lmao
Tim Dillon wearing his wyagu hoodie
These people who adopt animals got to be ready to rehabilitate these animals like druggies
They don't, though. They see bad behavior and think it's cute.
Tim is morphing into Ralphie May
8:20 This is so fucking true, I was almost dead set on getting a rosy boa snake and didn't see a problem at all with buying dead frozen mice and putting them in my freezer. Never had I considered some shit like that otherwise lmao
“Its beastiality….”
Tim: “indeed”
Went to a shelter and noticed a literal bucket full of used needles and vials, with the drugs and fresh needles on the table beside it, wanted to steal it all and run off
Burn notice has an episode where they get fent from an animal vet
The way Tim keeps pronouncing Beastiality as "Beeshtiality" is fkn hilarious😂😂😂
I'll let you use my Air BnB account.
Just one caveat.
Please clean any dishes, sinks...and don't break any chairs
I think I was but by a brown recluse and it ran its course but it turned into a nasty staff infection
Dude this he best outfit ever
I miss Tim & Ben together ❤😢
I'd love to see Tim try deal with Patrice O'Neill. R.i.p
8 eyes? 8 eyes is demon shit, tim.
It’s so funny he said this wearing a babe hoodie
The biggest problem about pure bred dogs is that they are very expensive healthcare wise. Mixed breeds got way less problems.
Depends lol
@False Flag Man you must be poor, i dont talk to poor people
Mixed breeds usually have more behavioral/mental problems
@@shanesolar3924 You're saying that based on what?
@@wolfrox777 conversations with multiple veterinarians
Feel like this whole bit was @WhitneyCummings
You can buy an Omega Seamaster for like 4k so it's not an extravagant gift but it's a really nice gift.
Except for the fact that it’s an omega 🤢
4k gift is pretty extravagant...are you rich as fuck or something😭
This is some brilliant comedy
I love Ben but he has no idea about purebred dogs
Those lesbians do love Joe....please rent their place and invite their most famous guest!!
"They're L0SERS, the rescues. I mean lets be honest. And you dont want them around your children"🤣🤣🤣
I read that someone went blind from those microscopic hairs.
Look into those prefabricated houses that Elon has…. 50-75k . All you need is a plot of land.
Do they explode spontaneously like his cars do?
When people say things like “largest such and such in the world”, I wish they would say instead “largest known spider” or such n such. Because every single title sized animal carrys the title until something bigger or older or better comes to light. This is the largest know species of spider but people have testified to larger spider in Vietnam for instance. Largest known spider. Smartest known person. Oldest known tree. Dumbest known human. Highest known altitude. Loudest known sound. Longest known jump. Dumbest known president. Richest known family. Oldest known fossil.
Gay
15:00 "that probably describes me" xDD
Just the title makes me laugh .
Ben is a hipster yelawolf
jumping spiders move in a way thats not so creepy
8:02 this offends me because Madagascar hissing cockroaches are cute and better pets than spiders
Was he Spiderman...
Elon should give Tim some money for simply breathing. He deserves it.
I'm glad I never had to adopt an animal or buy one , they always found me 🤷🏼♂️
(Yes i brought the spider to the dr at the hospital)
He's right. My mom made ua give away our pet birds... 4 different times. We get them, then she gets rid of them. Typical vv0hmæn.
Is Tim Dillon wearing bape?
My neighbor was bit by one in Cupertink when I was kid .she was bit in ass too. She was very trashy lady and wanted to show 9yr old me. Brown recluses are definitely in california even though they are not from here
Dogs should be shipped to other countries to be used as food to feed the starving not just killed here
@False Flag so true !
Purebreds live the length of life of their breed. If purchased from a good breeder they're very healthy. There isn't a downside as long as you get the breed that's right for your lifestyle and needs AND you're willing to take care of them. Dillon should NEVER get any kind of dog 😂
Edit: and no kill shelters ALSO kill their animals...by shipping them off to kill shelters.
Supporting the animal shelters is supporting puppy mills and ppl who dont fix their pets. Buying pure breds is ensuring happy and healthy dogs and only responsible ppl will adopt. Im tired of getting looks when i tell ppl i bought my dog from a breeder 🙄
I rescued my dog from a breeder.
This makes me happy to work at the only no kill shelter in my county
you probably own a snake or venomous tarantula. weirdo.
(jk lol)
nature kills animals.
Lmao looked up Brazilian Wandering Spiders and the venom from them causes erections 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 screw blue chew hahahaha
My son is really easy going he doesn't complain about much at all. In fact the only group of people he hates with a passion is orphans. Go figure.
Ben obviously doesn't know what a puppy mill is.
I adopted a french bourdeaux/pitbull mix. The woman who fostered him abused the fuck out of him. Took 2 full yrs to get him better. Now hes the best dog ever. But yeahyou gotta know if your capable of actually owning and rehabing a foster animal. Good on you tim.
or into tigers and lions or exotic cats ask the tiger king LOL
I bred purebred dogs. I bred dogs that have won at Westminster. Never made one penny profit. Find an ethical breeder who cares about temperament & does health screens. "Adopting" is just another virtue signal.
Adopting is actually a nice thing to do. The dogs in the pound have to go somewhere.
Why would you breed dogs for no profit? Sounds unlikely. Why would a carpenter make furniture for free
@@allengraham7407 you never had a hobby that you love? Sorry for you. Not everything is about making money.
My coworker is a world class breeder. Extremely well known as a breeder and trainer. Passionate about what he does and also makes good money. Those things are not mutually exclusive.
“Rescuing an animal from death and abuse is virtue signaling.”
🤦♂️
Get a cute dog. That shit matters
Have you no empathy?
put em in a pot!
People who want to make money and be higher up on the social hierarchy are the problem. Animal shelters, governments, non profits are all run by people trying to make more money and be better than their neighbors. People aren’t producing much good in the world when their concerns are money and social hierarchy.
I hate animal shelters those animals deserve homes but if places like Greene county animal control & humane society of greater Dayton are going to deny me because i don't live up to their standards then they don' deserve my business.
I heard a gay dude say that isn’t your real voice. I hope this isn’t true Timmy
It is his real voice.. he sounded different years ago this is true but over time he trained himself to have a deeper voice. Both types of voices displayed are his.
@@benjaminreyes3624 Benjamin...........have you ever met Tim Dillon? Did you go to high school together? Please do tell how you are so informed on this topic.
@@user-vm1rr6gx9v because EVERYONE can change their voice. If repeated enough times you can train yourself to sound a certain way 🤦
who gives a shit
comedians create artificial personas because they’re more entertaining
delivery matters
Lol yeah most things in California go to shit, I’ve never seen a shelter by me that resembles what he’s talking about
The dogs can recover most of the time though.
So what you are saying is that all dogs should just die? Lol
Brusmal
People find this insufferable ranting entertaining? How is this guy popular? People keep saying hes a comedian but ive been waiting 20 minutes for a joke... nothing.
The idea of only getting rescues is morally placing dogs on the same level as humans.
Its not that I am against sentimentality, but doing this is literal sin. You aren't glorifying the lives of dogs, you are unglorifying human life.
Why does Ben have so much problem with communicating… getting words out? He’s obviously not as Intelligent as u Tim, but hes SOOOOO BORING when ever u try to have a conversation with him! His laugh is interesting l/ intertwining but I wish he could actually have something interesting to say about things u are talking about??? He seems abused by his parents
lol wtf. that is a lot to infer from a short clip.
He grows on you
He seems anxious
@@MLHMODZ he obviously likes getting paid but Tim is very demanding if him & he makes him very anxious! Tim is ALOT
@@michelebergman4336 it’s part of the show. Ben is perfect for it. He has that nervous energy with good support laughs, wouldn’t be the same replacing him it’d have to be Tim solo.
I liked you until this Dillon. I hope you’re not serious about the way you treat dogs as if they aren’t living creatures
You are lying if you say you liked Tim before this.
So when looking for a roommate your ideal place to look would be a prison? Or an insane asylum cuz those are both applicable comparisons to a dog shelter
Stop pretending like puppies don't end up at shelters dude. To cast a dog out because of where it was born is stupid. More dogs for the rest of us@@carlosalejandre1000
i bought my dog and thats the move
Hack