If you observe and listen to him, you do things for him. You give good will, but if he still insults you and belittles you. Leave asap. He doesn't deserve you.
I KNOW RIGHT! He did well after I met him with warmth. Then he came back differently. But He does this again. I'm gonna cut that conversation and BE OUT! I have sat that boundary. You just dont get to snap on me anytime you're upset. Sorry.
@@Dlovely516 then expect to never be with anyone ever. The guys who don't snap are also the super passive ones who expect to be led. You want to be with someone alive? Then take the rough with the smooth. Snap back 300%. He needs to be a teeny bit scared of you when he messes up. Or else you're lost. He's not your best friend. He's your lover. Men respect tough women.
@@McFraneth I am the epitome of tough. This is a particular situation I'm speaking of. That I won't go into details. But I get your point. With Him, I'm not gonna keep using my energy just to be snapped on again. Just because he think he can. He's Toxic. He's not worth it. And apparently we're not to him so like I said. I'm out. Only do that for a good Man who's worth your time and energy.
When my partner is having a hard time and is being disrespectful, I engage with him minimally and focus on elevating my energy and feeling good. when I return to him, there’s more respect instantly.
Tried that melting hug and my guy started squeezing and rocking me. We stood there for what felt like forever! Felt soooo sweet. I felt so incredibly loved☺️
He may not owe me anything but I owe it to myself to respect myself enough to lean back, observe and when/if he comes back around set my boundary like she demonstrated. Here’s the script “ Oh my, it feels goo so wonderful to hear from you. We haven’t spoken in x days/ weeks. I’m looking for a regular dating relationship. So I’ve kind of moved on. “
Learning that nobody owes me anything from your videos was a huge wake up call for me! Also that men are doing subtle things for us all the time really switched my radar on. Thanks you, Adrienne ❤️
I lose respect for men who are unable to acknowledge and respect my emotions and feelings. It tells me that you lack emotional intelligence/awareness and I in turn don't feel like respecting your emotions or presence so I shut down and ignore completely. I got irritated when my boyfriend didn't acknowledge how I felt about a situation when I addressed it to him more than once and I gave him the complete cold shoulder and refused to do anything for him or show any support. I'm trying to alter the "eye for an eye" mindset
I hear ya! Once bitten twice shy. My BS detector is fine tuned so pay attention to your feelings and trust the way you feel versus your logic. The body never lies.
Thats exactly what I'm saying! Hell, it's hard sometimes. But I've been in my masculine so long so I'm trying a different approach. It works. But today was so frustrating! He was nasty and unapologetic. And didn't seem to care how I felt. Then went in about his "issues". I stepped in my feminine for him, but believe me next time. He will know its my turn to be there for me.
I do have a problem with saying that we should set the standard low. No woman should set a low standard, and we shouldn't be over the moon if they do a simple task or show a common courtesy. I teach my son to be respectful, and I expect my husband to be as well. I also don't think we should have to think so hard about every single thing we say to a man. Trust me, my husband doesn't think at all about the things he says to me. I do not invest in those who do not invest in me. I would rather be single forever than having to put this much energy into sustaining a relationship, good Lord.
I must've missed where she said set the standard low. I thought she said set the tolerance low for extremely disrespectful men. But other than that I agree 💯
I’ve been in a relationship with this man for about 2 months. As I’ve been watching your videos and applying what I’ve been learning from you , I’ve noticed he’s become MUCH more attracted to me I swear. Now he says that he can’t wait to fall in love with me. He says I’m so sweet and kind and not like other girls these days. What I think he means is I have tapped into my feminine energy and used it to better my relationship with him. Thank you for helping me find my femininity again 💕
Adrienne Miller I mean , I think love takes time , and we can’t misuse the word Love. I’m dating him because I know we will fall in love, and he’s made me a better woman and he supports me in what I do.
This morning when my husband got home from work I tried the melting hug and then I asked him how his day was nodded and smiled said you must be so exhausted gave him a little back rub nothing crazy left it at that and his response was so great he told me straight to my eyes you know how much I love you right? And he hasn’t been this sweet on his own for quite some time because we’ve been having bickering battles back-and-forth so we’ve been really snarky at each other but it’s amazing how goodwill begets goodwill I truly believe that and I’ve been practicing I’m so glad I found your channel you have some great videos thank you so much
Uh, parents do owe their children kindness. I don’t agree with her saying that people aren’t entitled to being treated with basic dignity as a default.
Hugs to you! 💕 It’s so important to just lean back and let the man sort things out. Feminine energy is warm and receiving. Masculine is doing. FEMM Tools is a great place to start working on your feminine energy. bit.ly/femmtools
Don't duct tape your Feminine Energy together one video at a time. Get "500 Ways" and a FEMM tools class and LEARN how to speak so men really listen and love you all the more! bit.ly/500waysbook bit.ly/femmtools bit.ly/newmanmanifesto bit.ly/ABCGetHimBack
How can you not have expectations? I get he doesn't owe me anything, still I want the guy I am dating to care for me... If he cannot fair enough still I expect my man to show up
Men respect the Mother archetype. The potential mother of HIS children. If he can't see it in you and he wants a family one day, he'll never really invest in you. You can be many archetypes but the Mother has to be in there too.
Hi Adrienne , For me the key has been to set the rules from the beginning and stopping him from the first time I feel disrespected. Talk to him and explaining what I don’t like and why I feel he is being disrespectful . I know it can take a few attempts because sometimes is part of their behavior but I warn him that otherwise I’ll move on . No drama . By the way Adrienne, you’re the relationship coach that I understand the most . You’re an 😇Thank you so much . 💕
Brenda Marie i’m not sure if you’re in a committed relationship or not but if you are not, I want you to try this, instead of schooling the man and how he’s disrespecting you I want you to instead just stay in your body and let him know how YOU feel. Don’t make it about any sort of threat that you might leave or what he did wrong, just let him know how it feels. I want you to practice with that some..? ❤️ Thank you so much for the kind words and sending you so much love.
Thanks again Luv! The most difficult pill I have ever had to swallow as well. Also a good reminder to not feel like we owe others so much. Additionally, the info about how a man's mind works is very interesting and so valuable. It is too easy to get going so fast in our own brain/emotions that we forget the different ways female&male brains are naturally wired. 💕
Don’t tolerate any disrespect from anyone. You are not responsible for people’s actions. It’s his responsibility to calm himself down when he is upset or having a bad day. No one will ever change unless they want to. Actually my partner should be there for me. No woman needs to deal with misery 🙄
I met a guy who begged me to meet for a week to see me, then we set a date to meet he stands me up & comes up with an excuse EOD. I was nice & said I was looking forward to it, but not interested in being strung along. He actually laughed about "how will get to that second date one day" prior. I should have listened to this 1st, but it's all good. I would never take a guy back like this. Luckily, I was smart enough to know by 8a yesterday he was just playing games & I took off to see my ex for a couple days 💗
Why would someone want to be walking on eggshells every second..... relationships are not a game..... each partner should work fully on themselves and then come together to be the best version of themselves for each other. Why would someone want to torture themselves with someone who is toxic for whatever reason, and that person can only fix themselves..... if the person is broken or toxic, he/she needs to be alone and fix themselves..... no matter a person does, will not change an individual, that person has to change on their own...... and that’s the way guys is..... that’s some BS
I sometimes get these “why” questions and no one asks for this stuff. It’s part of a cosmic journey and each person must make their own decisions and actions. Judgement is easy to serve yet a love life is complicated and full of learning opportunities.
Be sure you are not using feeling statements to make something happen with the man. Look into my videos about feeling statements and that they are not used to manipulate another person into being how you want them to be. Feeling statements are totally for you and your boundaries. If a man throws your feelings out the window and you’re talking about your feelings all the time... Perhaps it is time to choose your words more carefully and focus on what you truly need for you and not look just to the man to give it to you. Time to find what you feel FOR YOU.
Same with me. He gets mad at me suddenly, can't tell me what I did, and when I ask what I've done, he calls that me only caring about myself....he always has me apologizing but has never ge uinly apologized to me and he has done things that are so so wrong....and I fear him even seeing my comments on videos like these because he spies on my social media, takes it personal and acts like everything I say on social is about him when it's not, making him mad at me again.
I've done a lot of things for my man, but the thing he appreciates as "the greatest thing I've ever done for him" was the one time when he had a bad day and I listened to him talk about it. I should do this next time!
I simply ask him if he’s stressed when it’s so obvious that something is bothering him and he lies about it. I feel like he NEVER EVER EVER EVER gives me the real answer. Always has an answer but never what he is actually thinking and yet he expects and wants me to trust him and I can’t and he knows that I don’t even trust him but yet he is doing NOTHING wrong according to him
New to your channel. I may be off topic. Scenario: hubby comes home, asks about dinner, conversation revolves around his day, after dinner he showers, I try to share about my day, he cuts me off, says he's tired spends an hour or so texting on Facebook, he is able to make time for everyone else but me. I don't understand why I'm not as important as his friends.
Hugs to you! The nagging thing about this is he is sharing time with you speaking about his day. But he’s currently in a place where he gets more reward from venting and Facebook. I suggest you not share one thing about yourself for 2 weeks. Use my RRGH tool and be warm. When he finally asks you about your day BE Positive! 500 ways shares more on how to be warm, positive and reconnect. Go deeper with “500 Ways,” ebook and 2 day video classes. bit.ly/500waysbook
I'm going through a lot of these problems in my first serious relationship with a friend I've known for years before dating. Your videos are saving my life rn! We're not together currently but I find all of your advice so helpful in just viewing life and conducting myself as a woman in this hyper-masculine societal paradigm. I'm interested in the program options available and what your coaching rates are. You advice resonates with me so much, thank you for having this information and these services available!
Wonderful to hear! Keep going, and keep learning. I'm not currently taking on new coaching clients, but you can find all the programs, eBooks, classes, etc. that I offer on my website: bit.ly/everheart XOXO Much love to you!
There's a lot of variables to name calling. Selfish. Insecure, or the B word? We all have it in ourselves to say ugly things and if this happens ONCE you set the boundary right then and there!
@@AdrienneEverheart I did set the boundary the first couple of times, it never stopped and got worse. Last night I was a called a "dumb ass". He saw his mother stay with his father while being demeaned and belittled year after year. So he sees this as normal, and a woman sticking around as "normal".
Ok question…. My husband of 45 years is always very affectionate to me yet feels that makes it ok to say and do disrespectful things and be dismissive to me in public sometimes in person. Several people including one of our three sons asked me why he’s so self serving. After all these years I’m really beginning to see him differently, and it’s heartbreaking and I don’t know what to do and it’s been rather shocking to see how people perceive his behavior, and I assume I’ve been blinded all these years. I’ve given him nothing but that feminine energy you talk about and respect, and have always done this because as a teacher I easily become empathetic and become an natural counselor… and I know how this works. However, it seems like it’s been one way for way too long because i have found myself ignoring the negative for too many years since he justifies it was all the other ways he shows affection, devotion and love. He especially loves public displays of affection which make me quite uncomfortable. To me that sort of seems self-serving also I never noticed that until recently. I have no idea how to set boundaries after all these years. I’m beginning to get used to living with a broken heart and that can’t be healthy. An example is he does not get along with my mom ( few people actually do), but she’s is my mom and doesn’t have many years left. However he seems to really enjoy talking about her in public to people we don’t know really well and calling her really evil names. I recently told him people don’t wanna hear that and I don’t wanna hear that right now and nor do I wanna talk about my mom right now. We were in a small group and what he said really hurt me, yet he did not recognize that hurt when I said something about it. He said if you don’t want to hear about it don’t listen. I really think I just need to walk away next time that happens, but I don’t because he only does that in public and I don’t wanna make a scene! So I guess I’m sacrificing others for my own feeling including those around us who I know do not want to see me make a scene. Does anyone have any advice on this?
Walk away next time. If you’re feeling bad for any reason, excuse yourself and come back to your center. Guard your peace. We only have one life. You have to decide that you deserve to be unbothered and at peace. Show yourself more kindness and it will become habit. I hope you find your voice and realize that it is strong.
Okay I need to tell you, wearing something red, especially when your in a tiff with your man....works!!!! Unbelievable. He wanted to apologize for his little boy behavior 😊👌🏻💗
No one owes you anything? Well when 2 adults choose to get together and build a life together and to love and cherish eachother through the good and the bad, shouldn't he atleast owe you listening? Me and my husband dont have family and havent had alot if friends we tell eachother everything, I need to vent to him.
@@AdrienneEverheart that's too bad for them. They need to develop and recognize emotions and emotion regulations like grown ups. Stop making excuses for them.
Man this sounds like I’m suppose to just stroke his ego and powder his ass…. Let me tell you something. I wanted to get a PRN job and my husband. Accuses me of wanting to get a PRN job because I wanted another man. He then throws my things out of the house. Tries to throw my sisters things out of the house. (Little sister) was quickly informed he could not leagally do that. Threw a pee soaked towel in my face and then hit my dog then threathened divorce. I told him he could have it
he spoke to me disrespectfully once which triggered me to ask him to leave and break up with him. I don't feel good about that now, I'm unsure if I was teaching him something important about my boundaries or overreaction. I felt like this wasn't my job to fix 😬
why do women have to try so much to make a relationship work..do this , do that , don't do this , don't do that..Being feminine definitely doesn't mean this..
I believe we lost our way, (the feminine movement)became so masculine, it messed everything up, now we are learning just how to start over, and when a man who has been part of this masculine culture experiences a real feminine lady, the results will be refreshing and everything starts to fall into place.
Because we live in a male dominated society. If ever things become equal in our society, with no advantage to being male or masculine, this may change. Until then, women have to do more. 🤷🏽♀️
Sandra Sawyer yes and you couldn’t be more correct Sandra what’s funny is if you look back at history women didn’t have to try at all and they still don’t they just have to let the man do what he does and lead it’s that simple. Now I know that sounds scary but hey it worked for thousands of years it’s not that hard everybody just has to stop acting like we’re the same cus we’re not we are more different than you realize and don’t try to change anybody not going to work.
MF T ok where do you live that you think that this is a male society. Cus please if it was you wouldn’t have to try at all trust me but hey don’t take my word for just look up some history now that was a male only society back then if you think today is WOW
Very glad I stumbled across this. I don't date any more, but I work in quite a male dominated industry. Mostly it's OK but I have a colleague who is prone to try arguing and undermine decisions I make about how I spend my free time and disposable income. It's tempting to say “ thanks but I don't need your permission or approval, it's my life you don't get to tell me what I should and shouldn't do with it. This conversation is over" But this has opened my eyes to a possibly softer way...which takes the heat out of it. Thank you ❤️
For sure and GREAT point. You could nod and listen and say, "I am so honored you care about me so much. I can really feel your thoughtfulness, thank you. " Then do whatever you want to do. If you can attend the FEMM 3 day class starting this Saturday: www.EverheartCoaching.com xoxox!
Absolutely right no one loves me but I need to work on it to try busy on myself and only myself because my own people are full of fights and doubts that always broke my heart. I felt worthless many times but wen I am on that position I felt I work so hard I am intelligent , hard working something is there that I feel I can do many things in life to prove myself for my own worth.
I was recently in a relationship where i was accused of doing a drug i have never even considered taking because it just doesn’t interest me. His excuse was that he googled the symptoms for a long term user of this drug and he said i fit more than 5. I asked him for these symptoms and he only gave me 3 and said he didn’t want to tell me the rest because i would try to loop hole around it. I tried to be understanding and patient but he was so stuck on this story he made in his head. He told me that it was very hard for him to believe me because the “facts” are there. I even went to the extent of telling him i would go get drug tested to give HIM that peace of mind and he looked at me dead in the eye and said he had all the answers i needed. In that moment i felt so belittled and disrespected. He was questioning my character and analyzed me to the point of diagnosing me for something i have never done. I was so full of rage when he said that. I slapped him. I had never done that before because no one had made me feel so shitty ever in my life. He then told me to get the fuck out and he texted me saying that HE is completely heart broken and that he never wants me to contact him again and that he is completely in shock and heart broken and that he wishes me the best. I responded to him saying the following “I am more heartbroken over this. You accused me of something i have never done because you assume i fit the symptoms you saw online i was willing to get tested and show you that i have really never done it you said you have the Answers already and that infuriated me, didn’t give me a right to slap you but you also don’t have the right to tell me i’ve done something i have never done. Check yourself, you need to learn how to get out of your head. I’m just as in shock and i wish you the best”. After this i was completely destroyed mentally i felt manipulated, and i couldn’t help but think that if i really fit so many of these symptoms then i must have something wrong with me and that i’m maybe sick. The saddest part is that i love this man so damn much it hurts me more to see him act the way he did than how he actually made me feel.
For reference the day before is when he first brought it up. I heard him accuse me all i could do was tell him i’ve never done what he accused me of. But he kept going. I set a boundary and told him i couldn’t sit here and listen to him question my character. Later that same night i texted him that i miss him and to please talk to me. He APOLOGIZED and told me that he is so grateful he found me and that he loves me so much. He told me that he is so thankful that i’m here trying to fix and work on things with him and that he was sorry and he had to trust me. We talked all night and we fixed things. The next day everything went down.
@@AdrienneEverheart Thank you so much for replying, Adrienne. I agree with you completely.But I am a little bit afraid of being genuine with manipulative predatory men. Wouldn't it give them knowledge about me to use as ammunition against me ? I therefore just observe them without saying much.
Hello Adrienne! I just had a heart break, which brought me to your channel and I understood so much of what I did, at thd beggining I am feminine and then I turn masculine. But I would be curious to ask. I feel like the things you are teaching here can change me completely in my presence and interaction with people beyond just love life. But I wanted to ask about feminine energy: 1) Can we use it in our parallel not romance life. Like, can we be feminine with other people without being sexualized? (I feel really confused about this and this make me put a barrier between me and people) 2) How to use feminine energy in a friendship relation with another woman? (I grew up in a masculine energy and hanged more with the boys. I admired more my father as I grew up, but now, in my middle 20 I start to discover feminine energy, and feel like, wow!!! But ,I find it hard to have a girl group or even a girl friend, 'cause I do not know how to relatonate to them .) How do I do that? 3) Can you and how to use feminine energy in a friendship relation with another man? And how to establish the boundaries? 4) Do you have any resources or tips on this? 5) How to be a feminine goddess at all time? I love all your content. I can't wait to dig deeper into this. Feels exciting and like a whole new world is opening. Thank you for being here for me and for us! Feminine energy feels so empowering! Much love, Adina. :)
I notice many of your go-to statements are about being sad, scared, feeling "this small" and the like. Many of my feelings are ones of anger. If a man calls me a name, I feel angry. If a man yells at me, I feel angry. I guess my dominant fight-or-flight instinct is fight. Is it ok to say that you're feeling angry, or is that too aggressive and intimidating?
I think everyone of us whether we're male or female are entitled to whatever our feelings are. However most often if anger is the predominant feeling oh, there is something deeper underneath the anger. A fear of being abandoned, a fear of being rejected, a fear of feeling unworthy. I'd encourage you to dig deeper for what your true feeling is beneath the anger. Anger is an important indicator but it is usually the surface emotion because it feels safer to us then to feel the deeper more vulnerable feelings underneath that I described above
Good god yes!!! When you have 3 kids a full house to run and he complains sbout me forgetting to pay a bill, gives a ratts behind how I feel, but gooood forbid his mother farts the wrong way lol because hes on his knees asking her if shes ok! Ughh! And Also my husband pushes me away, if I buy him anything that I know he needs for work or I invest in great quality men’s vitamins, he Chooses to not acknowledge that he hides things he never uses them.
"No one owes us anything"??? Um...those are the unwritten rules of a relationship. 'An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical and/or emotional intimacy.' That is the definition of a romantic relationship. Intimacy comes with the package. I don't nt understand you logic.
That’s ok. Your inner boy is challenging the man. Being feminine is soft and caring but not coddling. Go deeper with “500 Ways,” ebook and 2 day video classes. bit.ly/500waysbook
I find that your videos are telling women to be doormats. Just toxic. And no one owes you anything? That's true to a certain extent but like you even mentioned parents. No your parents do owe you. They owe you love and support. And so does your man. Or don't be in a relationship. A woman shouldn't have to tiptoe around him and constantly change herself for adjust herself to him because he had a bad freaking day. I think this is downplaying the type of disrespect that most women encounter within their relationships. I think what women are looking for when they're searching out advice regarding this, is being completely taken for granted as if their needs mean nothing and no one is listening, especially the one person she really really needs which is her guy. This is totally man-centered. This is not empowering to women. Women shouldn't have to do all the work.
Hi Adrienne I have been watching your videos since 6 months ago! I recently manifested back my ex and I swear I felt like the thing I’ve been manifesting since June was so close and within grasp. (In June we were together and I manifested him making amends and a month later it led to two separations- and to this day still it hasn’t materialized) I felt okay the first day he came back after 2 1/2 months of not seeing him but it still felt hot&cold and I was still hurt and scared from the past. When we talked he took most of the insecurity away from apologizing and reassuring me with love and sincerity. I came back to him true to myself, 100% raw, honest and vulnerable. Something I wasn’t before. It was amazing the first day and I didn’t feel any ill intent but Within the week things went downhill FAST and I saw worst attributes in him that wasn’t there 6 months ago when we first got together. The day before yesterday He was completely loving, holding me and the next day when I confronted him about something he did through call and he got stressed shutdown FAST and broke us off and he “accepted that he’s going back to his old inconsiderate/not compassionate ways”. I got impulsive just for the night and I called him multiple times and sent a long message with something from one of your videos. After that on The last time call he said all of that above told me not to wait for him to call me then hung up on me and hasn’t called me back. I’m holding myself off from reaching out again and I’m so scared that he won’t reach out. [hes not the type to chase or make the first move even when he misses you or realized he’s messed up. He is very protective of himself and doesn’t like to think or dwell on things] I feel betrayed, exploited, used and confused. I don’t get why I manifested this situation when I was happy at first and FELT and BELIEVED he had changed and everything was so much better, why? So- I attracted him back and it was okay- now it messed up and we lost each other, again. Can I attract him back (better, assertive, puts effort, loving, understanding, negative traits removed etc) after already separating twice?
I fear he has this image of me as someone who doesn’t want to be with now. I feel like he got too frustrated with the talks we had within the week and whatever image of me hes making based of what else happened this week. (I’m also afraid I messed up by rambling on too much. I didn’t think I was and I don’t know if it’s his influence making me think that or if I myself am realizing I did). He’s not much of a communicator so he doesn’t know what to say a lot of the times and he did try this week even though he wronged me a couple times as well (lying, hiding things, etc). He just gave up on everything at that confrontation. 1 day before separation there was a time where i made a big mistake because I was frustrated with how disrespectful he was being and I hit one of his insecurities when I said “you are so rude is this what it’s like living with you?” And without thinking he responded “seems like everyone else has the same shit to say” (hence why he said he’s going back to his old ways the last time we talked. He sees everyone seeing him as a bad person and convinces himself that that’s how he is mostly) I honestly want to say sorry to him but with how things are now... And I feel a little silly/humiliated for breaking boundaries and having still showed tolerance for it by willing to work it out because I feel like that subconsciously ruins his image of me as someone amazing and with so much value. Maybe there’s more oopsies I did within communicating and or in other ways but I can’t recall. Whatever happened this week- whatever energies we’re putting off towards each other and the images we have of each other- Can all this be fixed?
I wouldn’t get caught up in fears. I would pull my energy away off this man and focus on your rich and warm beautiful life. The more you focus on the fear that he won’t come back the more it will materialize. Instead I would have a good conversation with myself and ask if 👉🏼 the way he is right now is this your dream relationship? I really encourage you get my ABC’s to get him back program. Remember when you reconnect with an ex you go back to just dating. That means dating him and other people too. You don’t go back to instant relationship. Much love to you.
Adrienne Everheart's Love Academy thank you! Will do and I definitely plan on getting it soon. Do you know how I manifested him back worse when I had been doing the opposite? Was it the fear that I confronted to him about or?.. I really believed he changed when we saw each other. What do you suspect? So- you’re saying despite how things went down hill... TWICE, it’s possible his his image of me can be completely reconstructed into a better image? As well as I can call a new man in him after my failed attempt? I’m very detailed ahaha- so I just wanna make sure if that’s what your whole library helps with.
So what I’m hearing is when my man doesn’t care about my feelings, i need to put myself aside and be there for him? That’s what’s been happening for two years and I’m forever on the back burner. Also he now expects me to be there for him with no reciprocity. This has never gotten my needs met.
I was following your videos without much success and felt pretty defeated until I realized he was a covert narcissist. 😱 They are incapable of empathy, feelings or caring about others. I was doing all this work and effort for nothing. If your involved with a narcissist or cluster b personality, then you will always be "praticing" and coming up empty. You'll be investing with getting little to nothing in return. Big red flag 🚩to pay attention ⚠
You are correct. Some men will toss out what you feel. Go back to what you feel. You decide if you keep him or not. Keep up the good work! 🥰 Attract a healthy love! bit.ly/femmtools
around 2:20 you say we don't owe each other anything and I had to pause and share Romans 13:8 with you: Owe nothing to anyone--except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God's law.
Hey Adrianne. I've been married for a couple of years. My husband and I have been together since we were quite young (20). overall I"m quite happy with the relationship but I do notice that sometimes he tends do make decisions about our household or lives in general without including me and it makes me feel very unimportant and alone. He has a really hard time compromising, he never really learned it as a child as well I believe. I loved the video! Do you perhaps have any additional advice :). Btw love all your content!
Have you tried a feeling statement: "I feel left out when decisions are made without me." See what he says. Express yourself, but without criticism toward him. Simply state how YOU feel, in your body. No blame. XO
@@AdrienneEverheart thank you so much Adrienne! I must say I'm quite nervous about trying my first feeling statement. It's easier in a way to play the blame game ;). I'll give it a go, perhaps in combination with the two week criticism hiatus (cold turkey :) :) )
annelievallaeys for sure choose your battles... however in “500 Ways” I teach you the true power of FSs is in knowing how YOU feel and knowing your boundaries! This is also known as respect. 🥰👍🏼😉
It’s not “no contact”. It’s pulling your energy away from the man and focusing on you. If he reaches out, you stay warm and feminine. No contact has an agenda in mind and is manipulative. Learn more here. bit.ly/femmtools
The guy I'm talking to in July.. he likes to joke around alot....we were texting and he told me something joking around but a little disrespectful. I told him hey can't talk to me like that but I wasn't rude. 2 days later he apologized and he said he knows he was wrong and hopes that u can forgive him. I accepted his apology but now he's silent since the end of July. Couple of weeks ago I messaged himmhiws he's doing he responded right away but still kind of short. I have not message him again but he is always looking at my social media....who knows ? I tried. Lol.
He won’t even tell me I’m beautiful in person and when I ask him why he never calls me beautiful he says “I do all the time” (NOT TRUE HE HAS NEVER) or “I will yet” … like WHAT THE HECK does that mean!!!???
What if my man never tells me weather he has a bad day or not…I literally NEVER EVER NO. hes like a freakin robot with no feelings..I always ask him how was your day and he always says “good” even tho I NO something isn’t right but he will fight me to the end and tell me I’m wrong. 😢😢 I need his attention and all I ever get from him is “I do give you attention” when I’m clearly telling him he’s not. But he doesn’t listen and he doesn’t care..it’s like he doesn’t even WANT to give me love and attention and that should already come naturally to a man that “loves” you and married you… Why did he get married to me if he’s gonna act like I’m not his partner???
This did not work for me. My (very recent) ex was highly supported by me all the way through his custody battle (that he won) and he even commented multiple times how great I was through it all. After the case closed he began bread-crumbing me even though I was clear with what I needed to feel valued (all the things he naturally did to show me attention and love during our first 9 months together). In the end he said he didn't think he could give me what I needed. I said goodbye.
I’m so sorry..🥰 yet I encourage you never stand by a man through so many things & times without an offer on the table. You were his mountain and his comfort and when he was ready to move on he did so and so will many other men. Feeling statements and boundaries are not to get a man to do something or be as you wish. It does however give you the absolute best chances of having him meet your needs or seeing the man for truly what he is. Any man can throw your feelings out the window and your boundaries too. A man will always do whatever he wants to do. That is why before you commit fully to just one man you need to make sure there is an offer on the table. Get FEMM tools for dating and learn how to date properly and in a feminine energy way that will work for YOU. Hugs & healing lovely you.
I disagree nobody owes us anything. When you marry someone you are agreeing to a mutually monogamous relationship which means both need to provide affection to the other because the agreement is each would not go outside the marriage to get it. If husbands and wives are cold and show absolutely no affection to each other, there is no need to be blocked into this agreement.... therefore there is some "owning"
I think she means set your expectations low so you’re not triggered or disappointed. Ppl have free will and won’t always treat you how you think you deserve. You don’t have to ACCEPT it
To whoever is reading this Jesus loves you and he’s coming soon. All you need to do to be saved is believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins was buried and came back to life on the 3d day confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and you’ll be saved. Today is the day of salvation tomorrow is not promised and you don’t want to miss the rapture it will be so bad like nothing ever seen before on earth. God bless
I tried to talk to him about how I feel about something he said I shouldn't worry about petty things (my feelings) there's more important things to worry about, and I'm going about it in a stupid way and I should be smart. Ok I guess that ( my feelings )went out the door! How do I go about expressing myself to my bf
@@AdrienneEverheart hi Adrienne. Not sure how to approach him. Basically, he disappears/ comes back, he's hot/ cold, but how do I tell him to just come back when he's absolutely ready. I know he wants to be with me and he's in the process of divorce. But he's not very vocal and I'm not sure how to approach him.
Lian here’s the thing, keep him in your quantum dating rotation. That means let him know it would feel lovely to see him once a week and you’re wishing him the best with his divorce but that you’re keeping your options open and dating other people. You do not want to be a man’s supportive woman during his divorce only fir him to next you. I hear about that so often. He needs to be divorced and on his own for about six or eight months before he can commit to another woman. Trust me here and keep him in your rotation, but you keep dating lots and lots of other men. Don’t just cut him out of your life because you really like him a lot and you’ll miss him terribly. Cut him out of your life when you can’t stand to see his face anymore 😂 or a high-quality man is claiming you and you are ready to become that man’s wife👑. I hope this is helped you. I highly encourage you get FEMM dating over at my website Everheartcoaching.com
Lian He is lucky you’re allowing him access to you. He’s already messed up a marriage and is now messing about with your time. Date other men and be sure not to make him a priority
I have said that about the chromosomes for a long time. Great minds think alike! Have always said that what men lack that women have is all on that broken off allele.
I like your channel... but some of this I completely disagree with. “A man doesn’t owe you anything” Men owe women respect. Disrespect is not acceptable. Disrespect if tolerated can turn physical and flat out abusive. Saying “he doesn’t owe you affection, hugs etc” can trigger women to accept a “low standard” setting them up for abuse. Huge no no.
It would be wonderful if we all as a species treated each other with respect all the time but we don’t. So when you understand that no one really owes you anything this is where you develop boundaries and how to best care for yourself and surround yourself with people who have attributes and qualities that meet your standards. I mostly use this phrase in dating because so often a woman goes on 1 to 3 dates with a man and she expects him to be there in some certain way and really he doesn’t owe you anything. It’s not like he’s married to you or is committed. I hope that helps cleared up.
Thanks a lot Adrienne Can you make a video about when he keep silent after an argument My partner is the kind of men that shut down for weeks for really nothing he dramatize and wait until I reach to him Thanks
Djamila B I hear about this often. Hugs to you. My answer is always the same and that is it needs to be talked about when times are OK. You need to let your man know that you “notice things shut down for weeks and going weeks without your partner feels so sad for you. And that you want to improve things and what does he suggest? “ 👉🏼Learn more in 500 ways to talk to a man ebook. You need to learn how to speak your feelings to a man and how to quell arguments before he shuts down and goes to the cave. Two weeks of avoiding you is not how people deal with conflict in a loving relationship.
Thanks a lot Adrienne I have already the 500 ways ti talk to a man it helped me a lot but I really think my man has issus he is enmeshed with his daughter and enmeshed with his mam I feel like he has no place for me 😣
Melanie H you don’t know that it never changes. These sorts of resources, therapy couples counseling, prayer and the willingness to improve will fix stonewalling. I find it so disheartening when someone puts a comment out on a forum like this and someone says just leave it will never change, as if you know them? Negativity begets negativity.
Thank you for your great insights. My man is respectful and sensitive. Sometimes he’s in his feminine side too much and he’s immature sometimes. How do you suggest I handle this ? ♥️
If you observe and listen to him, you do things for him. You give good will, but if he still insults you and belittles you. Leave asap. He doesn't deserve you.
I KNOW RIGHT! He did well after I met him with warmth. Then he came back differently. But He does this again. I'm gonna cut that conversation and BE OUT! I have sat that boundary. You just dont get to snap on me anytime you're upset. Sorry.
@@Dlovely516 then expect to never be with anyone ever. The guys who don't snap are also the super passive ones who expect to be led. You want to be with someone alive? Then take the rough with the smooth. Snap back 300%. He needs to be a teeny bit scared of you when he messes up. Or else you're lost. He's not your best friend. He's your lover. Men respect tough women.
@@McFraneth I am the epitome of tough. This is a particular situation I'm speaking of. That I won't go into details. But I get your point. With Him, I'm not gonna keep using my energy just to be snapped on again. Just because he think he can. He's Toxic. He's not worth it. And apparently we're not to him so like I said. I'm out. Only do that for a good Man who's worth your time and energy.
i needed to read this right now
yea if you are not married to him.
When my partner is having a hard time and is being disrespectful, I engage with him minimally and focus on elevating my energy and feeling good. when I return to him, there’s more respect instantly.
Wow this was really helpful thank you!!
Tried that melting hug and my guy started squeezing and rocking me. We stood there for what felt like forever! Felt soooo sweet. I felt so incredibly loved☺️
He may not owe me anything but I owe it to myself to respect myself enough to lean back, observe and when/if he comes back around set my boundary like she demonstrated. Here’s the script “ Oh my, it feels goo so wonderful to hear from you. We haven’t spoken in x days/ weeks. I’m looking for a regular dating relationship. So I’ve kind of moved on. “
You got it!! I suggest Femm Tools for Dating bit.ly/femmtools
This is also showing respect for him too, by being honest and warm enough to tell him the truth❤
Learning that nobody owes me anything from your videos was a huge wake up call for me! Also that men are doing subtle things for us all the time really switched my radar on. Thanks you, Adrienne ❤️
My pleasure and honor. You can see more than videos here on my website: bit.ly/everheart And thank you for the support and kind words! Much love! XOXO
I lose respect for men who are unable to acknowledge and respect my emotions and feelings. It tells me that you lack emotional intelligence/awareness and I in turn don't feel like respecting your emotions or presence so I shut down and ignore completely. I got irritated when my boyfriend didn't acknowledge how I felt about a situation when I addressed it to him more than once and I gave him the complete cold shoulder and refused to do anything for him or show any support. I'm trying to alter the "eye for an eye" mindset
Lorri Rayy me too
Its easier to do with someone who doesnt invalidate your feelings. Trust me youll be like wow this is easy
I hear ya!
Once bitten twice shy. My BS detector is fine tuned so pay attention to your feelings and trust the way you feel versus your logic.
The body never lies.
Exactly. Such a turn off and shows immaturity and selfishness. Where is the empathy?
Thats exactly what I'm saying! Hell, it's hard sometimes. But I've been in my masculine so long so I'm trying a different approach. It works. But today was so frustrating! He was nasty and unapologetic. And didn't seem to care how I felt. Then went in about his "issues". I stepped in my feminine for him, but believe me next time. He will know its my turn to be there for me.
I do have a problem with saying that we should set the standard low. No woman should set a low standard, and we shouldn't be over the moon if they do a simple task or show a common courtesy. I teach my son to be respectful, and I expect my husband to be as well. I also don't think we should have to think so hard about every single thing we say to a man. Trust me, my husband doesn't think at all about the things he says to me. I do not invest in those who do not invest in me. I would rather be single forever than having to put this much energy into sustaining a relationship, good Lord.
💯💯💯💯💯
I must've missed where she said set the standard low. I thought she said set the tolerance low for extremely disrespectful men. But other than that I agree 💯
My thoughts exactly.
@@LimitedReachEnt she definitely did. And more than once. I was shocked.
This feminine manipulation shit doesn't work on men. If he doesn't respect you it's how he feels about you.
You can't raise a man.
I’ve been in a relationship with this man for about 2 months. As I’ve been watching your videos and applying what I’ve been learning from you , I’ve noticed he’s become MUCH more attracted to me I swear. Now he says that he can’t wait to fall in love with me. He says I’m so sweet and kind and not like other girls these days. What I think he means is I have tapped into my feminine energy and used it to better my relationship with him. Thank you for helping me find my femininity again 💕
Katelyn Dundas awh!!! Keep me posted!!!💋💋
Katelyn Dundas Can smell red flags. Be careful.
Keep doing what ur doing. Us guys really are simple. Its really not complicated
Katelyn Dundas “can’t wait to fall in love with you”?! :/ that doesn’t sound right to me at all. why are you in a relationship with him then?
Adrienne Miller I mean , I think love takes time , and we can’t misuse the word Love. I’m dating him because I know we will fall in love, and he’s made me a better woman and he supports me in what I do.
Everyone deserves basic respect.
This morning when my husband got home from work I tried the melting hug and then I asked him how his day was nodded and smiled said you must be so exhausted gave him a little back rub nothing crazy left it at that and his response was so great he told me straight to my eyes you know how much I love you right? And he hasn’t been this sweet on his own for quite some time because we’ve been having bickering battles back-and-forth so we’ve been really snarky at each other but it’s amazing how goodwill begets goodwill I truly believe that and I’ve been practicing I’m so glad I found your channel you have some great videos thank you so much
You're learning all the secrets now! Great work! bit.ly/femmtools Look into FEMM for relationships.
Uh, parents do owe their children kindness. I don’t agree with her saying that people aren’t entitled to being treated with basic dignity as a default.
I love the way you sweetly said you were at your limit with the topic he was going on and on about
Thank you, I tend to see things black or white. Cutting him some slack while initiating your boundaries is wise. A good man will quickly understand.
Hugs to you! 💕 It’s so important to just lean back and let the man sort things out. Feminine energy is warm and receiving. Masculine is doing. FEMM Tools is a great place to start working on your feminine energy. bit.ly/femmtools
I feel like you are saving lives and families with your work.
Don't duct tape your Feminine Energy together one video at a time. Get "500 Ways" and a FEMM tools class and LEARN how to speak so men really listen and love you all the more! bit.ly/500waysbook bit.ly/femmtools bit.ly/newmanmanifesto bit.ly/ABCGetHimBack
she's helpful
@@patriciamorris3747 Thank you! xoxo!
How can you not have expectations? I get he doesn't owe me anything, still I want the guy I am dating to care for me...
If he cannot fair enough still I expect my man to show up
Yeah this confuses me too
Exactly. We all need expectations. When I didn't have any I went through hell. Ik keeping them.
then he is not for you
Men respect the Mother archetype. The potential mother of HIS children. If he can't see it in you and he wants a family one day, he'll never really invest in you. You can be many archetypes but the Mother has to be in there too.
Without mothering a man child.
Totally off topic, but those earrings are so beautiful
Thank you! Giant flowers :-)
Hi Adrienne , For me the key has been to set the rules from the beginning and stopping him from the first time I feel disrespected. Talk to him and explaining what I don’t like and why I feel he is being disrespectful . I know it can take a few attempts because sometimes is part of their behavior but I warn him that otherwise I’ll move on . No drama . By the way Adrienne, you’re the relationship coach that I understand the most . You’re an 😇Thank you so much . 💕
Brenda Marie i’m not sure if you’re in a committed relationship or not but if you are not, I want you to try this, instead of schooling the man and how he’s disrespecting you I want you to instead just stay in your body and let him know how YOU feel. Don’t make it about any sort of threat that you might leave or what he did wrong, just let him know how it feels. I want you to practice with that some..? ❤️ Thank you so much for the kind words and sending you so much love.
Adrienne Everheart's Love Academy Thanks Adrienne!
Thanks again Luv! The most difficult pill I have ever had to swallow as well. Also a good reminder to not feel like we owe others so much. Additionally, the info about how a man's mind works is very interesting and so valuable. It is too easy to get going so fast in our own brain/emotions that we forget the different ways female&male brains are naturally wired. 💕
Linda R. Keep up the good work!!
I feel that my man does owe me more respect than I am getting from him after 4 years together.
No one owes us anything but you may be craving feeling more like a team... I suggest New Man Manifesto to learn more. bit.ly/newmanmanifesto
@@AdrienneEverheart partners absolutely do deserve your respect.
Don’t tolerate any disrespect from anyone. You are not responsible for people’s actions. It’s his responsibility to calm himself down when he is upset or having a bad day. No one will ever change unless they want to. Actually my partner should be there for me. No woman needs to deal with misery 🙄
I met a guy who begged me to meet for a week to see me, then we set a date to meet he stands me up & comes up with an excuse EOD. I was nice & said I was looking forward to it, but not interested in being strung along. He actually laughed about "how will get to that second date one day" prior. I should have listened to this 1st, but it's all good. I would never take a guy back like this. Luckily, I was smart enough to know by 8a yesterday he was just playing games & I took off to see my ex for a couple days 💗
None owes me anything but when a guy makes declarations which turn into empty promises, thats not ok
Why would someone want to be walking on eggshells every second..... relationships are not a game..... each partner should work fully on themselves and then come together to be the best version of themselves for each other. Why would someone want to torture themselves with someone who is toxic for whatever reason, and that person can only fix themselves..... if the person is broken or toxic, he/she needs to be alone and fix themselves..... no matter a person does, will not change an individual, that person has to change on their own...... and that’s the way guys is..... that’s some BS
I sometimes get these “why” questions and no one asks for this stuff. It’s part of a cosmic journey and each person must make their own decisions and actions. Judgement is easy to serve yet a love life is complicated and full of learning opportunities.
@@AdrienneEverheart I totally agree with that part❤️
Ladies..... Stop putting your beautiful energy into chasing losers
When I used feelings statements with my ex he complained that I always talk about my feelings... in retrospect he wasn’t emotionally available to me
Be sure you are not using feeling statements to make something happen with the man. Look into my videos about feeling statements and that they are not used to manipulate another person into being how you want them to be. Feeling statements are totally for you and your boundaries. If a man throws your feelings out the window and you’re talking about your feelings all the time... Perhaps it is time to choose your words more carefully and focus on what you truly need for you and not look just to the man to give it to you. Time to find what you feel FOR YOU.
Same with me. He gets mad at me suddenly, can't tell me what I did, and when I ask what I've done, he calls that me only caring about myself....he always has me apologizing but has never ge uinly apologized to me and he has done things that are so so wrong....and I fear him even seeing my comments on videos like these because he spies on my social media, takes it personal and acts like everything I say on social is about him when it's not, making him mad at me again.
Sounds like my ex
Girl, men are crazy. Lol
False
that right there!
A guy talking a bubble bath and having herbal tea. Hilarious 😂
I_Been_ A_Boss good girl healing not so much for a guy. 😂
My bf loves to do this!
My boyfriend loves bubble baths too!! ;)
I've done a lot of things for my man, but the thing he appreciates as "the greatest thing I've ever done for him" was the one time when he had a bad day and I listened to him talk about it. I should do this next time!
This is so sweet!
I simply ask him if he’s stressed when it’s so obvious that something is bothering him and he lies about it. I feel like he NEVER EVER EVER EVER gives me the real answer. Always has an answer but never what he is actually thinking and yet he expects and wants me to trust him and I can’t and he knows that I don’t even trust him but yet he is doing NOTHING wrong according to him
New to your channel. I may be off topic. Scenario: hubby comes home, asks about dinner, conversation revolves around his day, after dinner he showers, I try to share about my day, he cuts me off, says he's tired spends an hour or so texting on Facebook, he is able to make time for everyone else but me. I don't understand why I'm not as important as his friends.
Hugs to you! The nagging thing about this is he is sharing time with you speaking about his day. But he’s currently in a place where he gets more reward from venting and Facebook. I suggest you not share one thing about yourself for 2 weeks. Use my RRGH tool and be warm. When he finally asks you about your day BE Positive! 500 ways shares more on how to be warm, positive and reconnect. Go deeper with “500 Ways,” ebook and 2 day video classes. bit.ly/500waysbook
I'm going through a lot of these problems in my first serious relationship with a friend I've known for years before dating. Your videos are saving my life rn! We're not together currently but I find all of your advice so helpful in just viewing life and conducting myself as a woman in this hyper-masculine societal paradigm. I'm interested in the program options available and what your coaching rates are. You advice resonates with me so much, thank you for having this information and these services available!
Wonderful to hear! Keep going, and keep learning. I'm not currently taking on new coaching clients, but you can find all the programs, eBooks, classes, etc. that I offer on my website: bit.ly/everheart XOXO Much love to you!
Men who love you back dont name call that's abuse...not "bad behavior" we have to be feminine but know the difference
There's a lot of variables to name calling. Selfish. Insecure, or the B word? We all have it in ourselves to say ugly things and if this happens ONCE you set the boundary right then and there!
@@AdrienneEverheart I did set the boundary the first couple of times, it never stopped and got worse. Last night I was a called a "dumb ass". He saw his mother stay with his father while being demeaned and belittled year after year. So he sees this as normal, and a woman sticking around as "normal".
So true. If your man calls you the C word he does not love you and he does not love women, simple as that
Watching this with tears in my eyes. 😢
Ok question…. My husband of 45 years is always very affectionate to me yet feels that makes it ok to say and do disrespectful things and be dismissive to me in public sometimes in person. Several people including one of our three sons asked me why he’s so self serving. After all these years I’m really beginning to see him differently, and it’s heartbreaking and I don’t know what to do and it’s been rather shocking to see how people perceive his behavior, and I assume I’ve been blinded all these years. I’ve given him nothing but that feminine energy you talk about and respect, and have always done this because as a teacher I easily become empathetic and become an natural counselor… and I know how this works. However, it seems like it’s been one way for way too long because i have found myself ignoring the negative for too many years since he justifies it was all the other ways he shows affection, devotion and love. He especially loves public displays of affection which make me quite uncomfortable. To me that sort of seems self-serving also I never noticed that until recently. I have no idea how to set boundaries after all these years. I’m beginning to get used to living with a broken heart and that can’t be healthy. An example is he does not get along with my mom ( few people actually do), but she’s is my mom and doesn’t have many years left. However he seems to really enjoy talking about her in public to people we don’t know really well and calling her really evil names. I recently told him people don’t wanna hear that and I don’t wanna hear that right now and nor do I wanna talk about my mom right now. We were in a small group and what he said really hurt me, yet he did not recognize that hurt when I said something about it. He said if you don’t want to hear about it don’t listen. I really think I just need to walk away next time that happens, but I don’t because he only does that in public and I don’t wanna make a scene! So I guess I’m sacrificing others for my own feeling including those around us who I know do not want to see me make a scene. Does anyone have any advice on this?
Walk away next time. If you’re feeling bad for any reason, excuse yourself and come back to your center. Guard your peace. We only have one life. You have to decide that you deserve to be unbothered and at peace. Show yourself more kindness and it will become habit. I hope you find your voice and realize that it is strong.
Okay I need to tell you, wearing something red, especially when your in a tiff with your man....works!!!! Unbelievable. He wanted to apologize for his little boy behavior 😊👌🏻💗
Jesus.
You and I are always on the same emotional wavelength and I truly appreciate you.
Awesome! I am happy to help.
No one owes you anything? Well when 2 adults choose to get together and build a life together and to love and cherish eachother through the good and the bad, shouldn't he atleast owe you listening? Me and my husband dont have family and havent had alot if friends we tell eachother everything, I need to vent to him.
Hugs to you! 💕 Men can’t always handle it when we vent to them. They don’t process emotions and language like we do. They also require time & space.
@@AdrienneEverheart that's too bad for them. They need to develop and recognize emotions and emotion regulations like grown ups. Stop making excuses for them.
Man this sounds like I’m suppose to just stroke his ego and powder his ass…. Let me tell you something. I wanted to get a PRN job and my husband. Accuses me of wanting to get a PRN job because I wanted another man. He then throws my things out of the house. Tries to throw my sisters things out of the house. (Little sister) was quickly informed he could not leagally do that. Threw a pee soaked towel in my face and then hit my dog then threathened divorce. I told him he could have it
He sounds dysfunctional. Feminine energy is not about ass powdering. Keep watching and learning and hope you’re ok!🥰
he spoke to me disrespectfully once which triggered me to ask him to leave and break up with him. I don't feel good about that now, I'm unsure if I was teaching him something important about my boundaries or overreaction. I felt like this wasn't my job to fix 😬
I did the same thing. Did he fix it ?
why do women have to try so much to make a relationship work..do this , do that , don't do this , don't do that..Being feminine definitely doesn't mean this..
I believe we lost our way, (the feminine movement)became so masculine, it messed everything up, now we are learning just how to start over, and when a man who has been part of this masculine culture experiences a real feminine lady, the results will be refreshing and everything starts to fall into place.
Because we live in a male dominated society. If ever things become equal in our society, with no advantage to being male or masculine, this may change. Until then, women have to do more. 🤷🏽♀️
Sandra Sawyer yes and you couldn’t be more correct Sandra what’s funny is if you look back at history women didn’t have to try at all and they still don’t they just have to let the man do what he does and lead it’s that simple. Now I know that sounds scary but hey it worked for thousands of years it’s not that hard everybody just has to stop acting like we’re the same cus we’re not we are more different than you realize and don’t try to change anybody not going to work.
MF T ok where do you live that you think that this is a male society. Cus please if it was you wouldn’t have to try at all trust me but hey don’t take my word for just look up some history now that was a male only society back then if you think today is WOW
Very glad I stumbled across this. I don't date any more, but I work in quite a male dominated industry. Mostly it's OK but I have a colleague who is prone to try arguing and undermine decisions I make about how I spend my free time and disposable income. It's tempting to say “ thanks but I don't need your permission or approval, it's my life you don't get to tell me what I should and shouldn't do with it. This conversation is over"
But this has opened my eyes to a possibly softer way...which takes the heat out of it. Thank you ❤️
For sure and GREAT point. You could nod and listen and say, "I am so honored you care about me so much. I can really feel your thoughtfulness, thank you. " Then do whatever you want to do. If you can attend the FEMM 3 day class starting this Saturday: www.EverheartCoaching.com xoxox!
Absolutely right no one loves me but I need to work on it to try busy on myself and only myself because my own people are full of fights and doubts that always broke my heart. I felt worthless many times but wen I am on that position I felt I work so hard I am intelligent , hard working something is there that I feel I can do many things in life to prove myself for my own worth.
I was recently in a relationship where i was accused of doing a drug i have never even considered taking because it just doesn’t interest me. His excuse was that he googled the symptoms for a long term user of this drug and he said i fit more than 5. I asked him for these symptoms and he only gave me 3 and said he didn’t want to tell me the rest because i would try to loop hole around it. I tried to be understanding and patient but he was so stuck on this story he made in his head. He told me that it was very hard for him to believe me because the “facts” are there. I even went to the extent of telling him i would go get drug tested to give HIM that peace of mind and he looked at me dead in the eye and said he had all the answers i needed. In that moment i felt so belittled and disrespected. He was questioning my character and analyzed me to the point of diagnosing me for something i have never done. I was so full of rage when he said that. I slapped him. I had never done that before because no one had made me feel so shitty ever in my life. He then told me to get the fuck out and he texted me saying that HE is completely heart broken and that he never wants me to contact him again and that he is completely in shock and heart broken and that he wishes me the best. I responded to him saying the following “I am more heartbroken over this. You accused me of something i have never done because you assume i fit the symptoms you saw online i was willing to get tested and show you that i have really never done it you said you have the Answers already and that infuriated me, didn’t give me a right to slap you but you also don’t have the right to tell me i’ve done something i have never done. Check yourself, you need to learn how to get out of your head. I’m just as in shock and i wish you the best”. After this i was completely destroyed mentally i felt manipulated, and i couldn’t help but think that if i really fit so many of these symptoms then i must have something wrong with me and that i’m maybe sick. The saddest part is that i love this man so damn much it hurts me more to see him act the way he did than how he actually made me feel.
For reference the day before is when he first brought it up. I heard him accuse me all i could do was tell him i’ve never done what he accused me of. But he kept going. I set a boundary and told him i couldn’t sit here and listen to him question my character. Later that same night i texted him that i miss him and to please talk to me. He APOLOGIZED and told me that he is so grateful he found me and that he loves me so much. He told me that he is so thankful that i’m here trying to fix and work on things with him and that he was sorry and he had to trust me. We talked all night and we fixed things. The next day everything went down.
How would you respond if it was a husband and wife in that situation and how would you cut off the bad behaviour ? If he’s venting and saying things ?
At the end of the day, it's about being genuine and not being manipulative.
Yes. It’s all about how you feel!
@@AdrienneEverheart Thank you so much for replying, Adrienne. I agree with you completely.But I am a little bit afraid of being genuine with manipulative predatory men. Wouldn't it give them knowledge about me to use as ammunition against me ? I therefore just observe them without saying much.
My favorite feminine dating coach! 💜
wyt_chyna xoxo!!❤️🥰
Hello Adrienne!
I just had a heart break, which brought me to your channel and I understood so much of what I did, at thd beggining I am feminine and then I turn masculine.
But I would be curious to ask. I feel like the things you are teaching here can change me completely in my presence and interaction with people beyond just love life.
But I wanted to ask about feminine energy:
1) Can we use it in our parallel not romance life. Like, can we be feminine with other people without being sexualized? (I feel really confused about this and this make me put a barrier between me and people)
2) How to use feminine energy in a friendship relation with another woman? (I grew up in a masculine energy and hanged more with the boys. I admired more my father as I grew up, but now, in my middle 20 I start to discover feminine energy, and feel like, wow!!! But ,I find it hard to have a girl group or even a girl friend, 'cause I do not know how to relatonate to them .) How do I do that?
3) Can you and how to use feminine energy in a friendship relation with another man? And how to establish the boundaries?
4) Do you have any resources or tips on this?
5) How to be a feminine goddess at all time?
I love all your content. I can't wait to dig deeper into this. Feels exciting and like a whole new world is opening.
Thank you for being here for me and for us! Feminine energy feels so empowering!
Much love,
Adina. :)
Hi, in order: yes, practice, practice experiment, my programs and more practice. bit.ly/femmtools
I notice many of your go-to statements are about being sad, scared, feeling "this small" and the like. Many of my feelings are ones of anger. If a man calls me a name, I feel angry. If a man yells at me, I feel angry. I guess my dominant fight-or-flight instinct is fight. Is it ok to say that you're feeling angry, or is that too aggressive and intimidating?
I think everyone of us whether we're male or female are entitled to whatever our feelings are. However most often if anger is the predominant feeling oh, there is something deeper underneath the anger. A fear of being abandoned, a fear of being rejected, a fear of feeling unworthy. I'd encourage you to dig deeper for what your true feeling is beneath the anger. Anger is an important indicator but it is usually the surface emotion because it feels safer to us then to feel the deeper more vulnerable feelings underneath that I described above
Good god yes!!! When you have 3 kids a full house to run and he complains sbout me forgetting to pay a bill, gives a ratts behind how I feel, but gooood forbid his mother farts the wrong way lol because hes on his knees asking her if shes ok! Ughh! And Also my husband pushes me away, if I buy him anything that I know he needs for work or I invest in great quality men’s vitamins, he Chooses to not acknowledge that he hides things he never uses them.
"No one owes us anything"???
Um...those are the unwritten rules of a relationship. 'An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical and/or emotional intimacy.' That is the definition of a romantic relationship. Intimacy comes with the package.
I don't nt understand you logic.
I got through 7 minutes of this and it sounded more like a lesson in how to coddle a man like he's a baby. I would like a relationship with an adult
That’s ok. Your inner boy is challenging the man. Being feminine is soft and caring but not coddling. Go deeper with “500 Ways,” ebook and 2 day video classes. bit.ly/500waysbook
I find that your videos are telling women to be doormats. Just toxic. And no one owes you anything? That's true to a certain extent but like you even mentioned parents. No your parents do owe you. They owe you love and support. And so does your man. Or don't be in a relationship. A woman shouldn't have to tiptoe around him and constantly change herself for adjust herself to him because he had a bad freaking day. I think this is downplaying the type of disrespect that most women encounter within their relationships. I think what women are looking for when they're searching out advice regarding this, is being completely taken for granted as if their needs mean nothing and no one is listening, especially the one person she really really needs which is her guy. This is totally man-centered. This is not empowering to women. Women shouldn't have to do all the work.
He always comes back saying that I'm over thinking...
I wish your book was an actual paper book I could make notes in and it was cheaper. I love your videos! 🥰🥰
Hi Adrienne I have been watching your videos since 6 months ago!
I recently manifested back my ex and I swear I felt like the thing I’ve been manifesting since June was so close and within grasp. (In June we were together and I manifested him making amends and a month later it led to two separations- and to this day still it hasn’t materialized) I felt okay the first day he came back after 2 1/2 months of not seeing him but it still felt hot&cold and I was still hurt and scared from the past. When we talked he took most of the insecurity away from apologizing and reassuring me with love and sincerity. I came back to him true to myself, 100% raw, honest and vulnerable. Something I wasn’t before. It was amazing the first day and I didn’t feel any ill intent but Within the week things went downhill FAST and I saw worst attributes in him that wasn’t there 6 months ago when we first got together.
The day before yesterday He was completely loving, holding me and the next day when I confronted him about something he did through call and he got stressed shutdown FAST and broke us off and he “accepted that he’s going back to his old inconsiderate/not compassionate ways”. I got impulsive just for the night and I called him multiple times and sent a long message with something from one of your videos. After that on The last time call he said all of that above told me not to wait for him to call me then hung up on me and hasn’t called me back. I’m holding myself off from reaching out again and I’m so scared that he won’t reach out. [hes not the type to chase or make the first move even when he misses you or realized he’s messed up. He is very protective of himself and doesn’t like to think or dwell on things] I feel betrayed, exploited, used and confused.
I don’t get why I manifested this situation when I was happy at first and FELT and BELIEVED he had changed and everything was so much better, why?
So- I attracted him back and it was okay- now it messed up and we lost each other, again. Can I attract him back (better, assertive, puts effort, loving, understanding, negative traits removed etc) after already separating twice?
I fear he has this image of me as someone who doesn’t want to be with now. I feel like he got too frustrated with the talks we had within the week and whatever image of me hes making based of what else happened this week. (I’m also afraid I messed up by rambling on too much. I didn’t think I was and I don’t know if it’s his influence making me think that or if I myself am realizing I did). He’s not much of a communicator so he doesn’t know what to say a lot of the times and he did try this week even though he wronged me a couple times as well (lying, hiding things, etc). He just gave up on everything at that confrontation.
1 day before separation there was a time where i made a big mistake because I was frustrated with how disrespectful he was being and I hit one of his insecurities when I said “you are so rude is this what it’s like living with you?” And without thinking he responded “seems like everyone else has the same shit to say” (hence why he said he’s going back to his old ways the last time we talked. He sees everyone seeing him as a bad person and convinces himself that that’s how he is mostly) I honestly want to say sorry to him but with how things are now...
And I feel a little silly/humiliated for breaking boundaries and having still showed tolerance for it by willing to work it out because I feel like that subconsciously ruins his image of me as someone amazing and with so much value.
Maybe there’s more oopsies I did within communicating and or in other ways but I can’t recall. Whatever happened this week- whatever energies we’re putting off towards each other and the images we have of each other-
Can all this be fixed?
I wouldn’t get caught up in fears. I would pull my energy away off this man and focus on your rich and warm beautiful life. The more you focus on the fear that he won’t come back the more it will materialize. Instead I would have a good conversation with myself and ask if 👉🏼 the way he is right now is this your dream relationship? I really encourage you get my ABC’s to get him back program. Remember when you reconnect with an ex you go back to just dating. That means dating him and other people too. You don’t go back to instant relationship. Much love to you.
Adrienne Everheart's Love Academy thank you! Will do and I definitely plan on getting it soon. Do you know how I manifested him back worse when I had been doing the opposite? Was it the fear that I confronted to him about or?.. I really believed he changed when we saw each other. What do you suspect?
So- you’re saying despite how things went down hill... TWICE, it’s possible his his image of me can be completely reconstructed into a better image? As well as I can call a new man in him after my failed attempt? I’m very detailed ahaha- so I just wanna make sure if that’s what your whole library helps with.
Respect is earned bot given
One of your best videos EVER! 😉 Thank you!
Sharon Raquel you are so welcome.
So what I’m hearing is when my man doesn’t care about my feelings, i need to put myself aside and be there for him? That’s what’s been happening for two years and I’m forever on the back burner. Also he now expects me to be there for him with no reciprocity. This has never gotten my needs met.
Is this really what you’re hearing? If so watch it again. Hugs.
I was following your videos without much success and felt pretty defeated until I realized he was a covert narcissist. 😱
They are incapable of empathy, feelings or caring about others.
I was doing all this work and effort for nothing. If your involved with a narcissist or cluster b personality, then you will always be
"praticing" and coming up empty. You'll be investing with getting little to nothing in return. Big red flag 🚩to pay attention ⚠
You are correct. Some men will toss out what you feel. Go back to what you feel. You decide if you keep him or not. Keep up the good work! 🥰 Attract a healthy love! bit.ly/femmtools
I agree, these techniques work on healthy people
Nobody owes us anything.....great advice .....thank you so much .....all problems are due to our expectations on others. I wish to implement this 😊
Now I know that I'm way to smarter for a woman and I intimidate men so much... I think deep and solves problem
I was able to do this a lot with my ex. But then he got tired. He started to say mean things and saying I was exhausting.
Amazingggg girl youre just amazingggg your wordssss❤💯💯💯
around 2:20 you say we don't owe each other anything and I had to pause and share Romans 13:8 with you: Owe nothing to anyone--except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God's law.
Amen to that !!
This is totally off topic, but I looooove your earrings 😍...and the message, of course 😁
Thank you so much 😀
Hey Adrianne. I've been married for a couple of years. My husband and I have been together since we were quite young (20). overall I"m quite happy with the relationship but I do notice that sometimes he tends do make decisions about our household or lives in general without including me and it makes me feel very unimportant and alone. He has a really hard time compromising, he never really learned it as a child as well I believe. I loved the video! Do you perhaps have any additional advice :). Btw love all your content!
Have you tried a feeling statement: "I feel left out when decisions are made without me." See what he says. Express yourself, but without criticism toward him. Simply state how YOU feel, in your body. No blame. XO
@@AdrienneEverheart thank you so much Adrienne! I must say I'm quite nervous about trying my first feeling statement. It's easier in a way to play the blame game ;). I'll give it a go, perhaps in combination with the two week criticism hiatus (cold turkey :) :) )
annelievallaeys for sure choose your battles... however in “500 Ways” I teach you the true power of FSs is in knowing how YOU feel and knowing your boundaries! This is also known as respect. 🥰👍🏼😉
So helpful, I'm loving your channel and advice Adrienne
Hugs to you! 💕 I’m so happy to help! Learn more here. bit.ly/femmtools
You're an Angel 😇 I'm gonna make myself better.... Doing my no contact by watching your videos for my betterment 🍀💌✨
It’s not “no contact”. It’s pulling your energy away from the man and focusing on you. If he reaches out, you stay warm and feminine. No contact has an agenda in mind and is manipulative. Learn more here. bit.ly/femmtools
I like ur plants behind and lamp!! That's a cute backdrop!!! Love ur earings also!
Listened twice, got even more out the second time. Bout to listen again. Preach!
Happy to help!
The guy I'm talking to in July.. he likes to joke around alot....we were texting and he told me something joking around but a little disrespectful. I told him hey can't talk to me like that but I wasn't rude. 2 days later he apologized and he said he knows he was wrong and hopes that u can forgive him. I accepted his apology but now he's silent since the end of July. Couple of weeks ago I messaged himmhiws he's doing he responded right away but still kind of short. I have not message him again but he is always looking at my social media....who knows ? I tried. Lol.
Hugs to you! 💕 My ABC program has been proven to help get your man back in any situation. Learn more here. bit.ly/ABCGetHimBack
I tried it and he asked what i was doing and to get away from him. Thinking about your ebook and thanks Adrienne! You're great
Hugs to you! 💕 Learn to speak so he will listen and tie his heart up for good! My ebook “500 Ways”‘will help you with this! bit.ly/500waysbook
Thank you
Please can you talk about being married
Beautiful earings and wisdom and hug tip!
He won’t even tell me I’m beautiful in person and when I ask him why he never calls me beautiful he says “I do all the time” (NOT TRUE HE HAS NEVER) or “I will yet” … like WHAT THE HECK does that mean!!!???
Totally relevant. Love u sis!
Sending you so much love! 💕
I did the really really get him tool and my husband got really annoyed when I named his emotion and told me to stop
Hi Adrienne,
Can you do a video on:
Dating 101 w feminine energy?
Dating divorced men ?
Thank you
Amazing video Adrienne! Thank you 🙏
Nobody is entitled to have respect
What if my man never tells me weather he has a bad day or not…I literally NEVER EVER NO. hes like a freakin robot with no feelings..I always ask him how was your day and he always says “good” even tho I NO something isn’t right but he will fight me to the end and tell me I’m wrong. 😢😢 I need his attention and all I ever get from him is “I do give you attention” when I’m clearly telling him he’s not. But he doesn’t listen and he doesn’t care..it’s like he doesn’t even WANT to give me love and attention and that should already come naturally to a man that “loves” you and married you…
Why did he get married to me if he’s gonna act like I’m not his partner???
This did not work for me. My (very recent) ex was highly supported by me all the way through his custody battle (that he won) and he even commented multiple times how great I was through it all. After the case closed he began bread-crumbing me even though I was clear with what I needed to feel valued (all the things he naturally did to show me attention and love during our first 9 months together). In the end he said he didn't think he could give me what I needed. I said goodbye.
I’m so sorry..🥰 yet I encourage you never stand by a man through so many things & times without an offer on the table. You were his mountain and his comfort and when he was ready to move on he did so and so will many other men. Feeling statements and boundaries are not to get a man to do something or be as you wish. It does however give you the absolute best chances of having him meet your needs or seeing the man for truly what he is. Any man can throw your feelings out the window and your boundaries too. A man will always do whatever he wants to do. That is why before you commit fully to just one man you need to make sure there is an offer on the table. Get FEMM tools for dating and learn how to date properly and in a feminine energy way that will work for YOU. Hugs & healing lovely you.
I disagree nobody owes us anything. When you marry someone you are agreeing to a mutually monogamous relationship which means both need to provide affection to the other because the agreement is each would not go outside the marriage to get it. If husbands and wives are cold and show absolutely no affection to each other, there is no need to be blocked into this agreement.... therefore there is some "owning"
Yes. This makes so much sense. Thank you!
Set your standard low????? 🤔 No…there needs to be mutual respect. I don’t care what type of day either person has had. Respect is a choice.
I think she means set your expectations low so you’re not triggered or disappointed. Ppl have free will and won’t always treat you how you think you deserve.
You don’t have to ACCEPT it
I love your videos! Thank you for sharing your viewpoints
Hugs to you! 💕 I’m so happy to help!
The drag and drop is interesting. Looking back I was always the person to take the "folders" from others.
To whoever is reading this Jesus loves you and he’s coming soon. All you need to do to be saved is believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins was buried and came back to life on the 3d day confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and you’ll be saved. Today is the day of salvation tomorrow is not promised and you don’t want to miss the rapture it will be so bad like nothing ever seen before on earth. God bless
I tried to talk to him about how I feel about something he said I shouldn't worry about petty things (my feelings) there's more important things to worry about, and I'm going about it in a stupid way and I should be smart. Ok I guess that ( my feelings )went out the door! How do I go about expressing myself to my bf
Hi Adrienne...I purchased your book '500 ways', and I had a follow up question regarding when he disappears/ comes back.
Ask here!!!
@@AdrienneEverheart hi Adrienne. Not sure how to approach him. Basically, he disappears/ comes back, he's hot/ cold, but how do I tell him to just come back when he's absolutely ready. I know he wants to be with me and he's in the process of divorce. But he's not very vocal and I'm not sure how to approach him.
Lian here’s the thing, keep him in your quantum dating rotation. That means let him know it would feel lovely to see him once a week and you’re wishing him the best with his divorce but that you’re keeping your options open and dating other people. You do not want to be a man’s supportive woman during his divorce only fir him to next you. I hear about that so often. He needs to be divorced and on his own for about six or eight months before he can commit to another woman. Trust me here and keep him in your rotation, but you keep dating lots and lots of other men. Don’t just cut him out of your life because you really like him a lot and you’ll miss him terribly. Cut him out of your life when you can’t stand to see his face anymore 😂 or a high-quality man is claiming you and you are ready to become that man’s wife👑. I hope this is helped you. I highly encourage you get FEMM dating over at my website Everheartcoaching.com
@@AdrienneEverheart thanks Adrienne for the solution. I'll tell him and see what happens. I know he'll be upset once I tell him.
Lian He is lucky you’re allowing him access to you. He’s already messed up a marriage and is now messing about with your time. Date other men and be sure not to make him a priority
Thank you ❤️❤️❤️
Hey, can you share which video to see advice on what to do if he is still in touch with his ex?
I have said that about the chromosomes for a long time. Great minds think alike!
Have always said that what men lack that women have is all on that broken off allele.
💕💕💕
I like your channel... but some of this I completely disagree with. “A man doesn’t owe you anything” Men owe women respect. Disrespect is not acceptable. Disrespect if tolerated can turn physical and flat out abusive. Saying “he doesn’t owe you affection, hugs etc” can trigger women to accept a “low standard” setting them up for abuse. Huge no no.
It would be wonderful if we all as a species treated each other with respect all the time but we don’t. So when you understand that no one really owes you anything this is where you develop boundaries and how to best care for yourself and surround yourself with people who have attributes and qualities that meet your standards. I mostly use this phrase in dating because so often a woman goes on 1 to 3 dates with a man and she expects him to be there in some certain way and really he doesn’t owe you anything. It’s not like he’s married to you or is committed. I hope that helps cleared up.
@@AdrienneEverheart Very meaningful words :)
Thanks a lot Adrienne
Can you make a video about when he keep silent after an argument
My partner is the kind of men that shut down for weeks for really nothing he dramatize and wait until I reach to him
Thanks
Djamila B I hear about this often. Hugs to you. My answer is always the same and that is it needs to be talked about when times are OK. You need to let your man know that you “notice things shut down for weeks and going weeks without your partner feels so sad for you. And that you want to improve things and what does he suggest? “
👉🏼Learn more in 500 ways to talk to a man ebook. You need to learn how to speak your feelings to a man and how to quell arguments before he shuts down and goes to the cave. Two weeks of avoiding you is not how people deal with conflict in a loving relationship.
Thanks a lot Adrienne I have already the 500 ways ti talk to a man it helped me a lot but I really think my man has issus he is enmeshed with his daughter and enmeshed with his mam I feel like he has no place for me 😣
It’s called stonewalling, it’s a punishment technique. Leave and move on, it never changes.
Thank you I am ready to leave because I am working on myself
It was so difficult to leave him even though I had only crumbs
Melanie H you don’t know that it never changes. These sorts of resources, therapy couples counseling, prayer and the willingness to improve will fix stonewalling. I find it so disheartening when someone puts a comment out on a forum like this and someone says just leave it will never change, as if you know them? Negativity begets negativity.
This is great information!
Lovely video 💕. Any platform for those who are not on social media...
If u respect us we respect back
Thank you for your great insights. My man is respectful and sensitive. Sometimes he’s in his feminine side too much and he’s immature sometimes. How do you suggest I handle this ? ♥️
You have to be more girl than he is. Ignore the things that rub you wrong. Lead by example.
Thank you 🍀
You are so welcome! 💕