This Is Why I'm STILL SINGLE | Anthony O’Neal
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- Опубликовано: 16 сен 2024
- In this episode of The Table With Anthony ONeal, we welcome Dr. Anita back to the show to explore the profound connection between mental health and financial well-being. Dr. Anita is an esteemed figure renowned for her groundbreaking work in mental health, faith, and culture, delves into the impact of trauma on our lives. With her dynamic expertise, we shed light on the importance of mental health and how it influences our finances and spending habits. Prepare to be enlightened and inspired as we navigate this crucial intersection of mental health, faith, and finance!
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Hey, fam! I’m Anthony and I’m here to help you discover your authentic self and achieve spiritual, financial, and mental freedom. I know what it’s like to be in debt and homeless - I’ve been there. But with the grace of God, I was able to turn my life around and I’m now helping others to do the same.
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Best takeaway in this video is that 70% of a marriage is friendship, and the need to practice good relationship skills even in platonic (and familial) connections. We can't wait for a romantic partner to start practicing good relationship skills. 💯💫🙏🏿
That good!!
I’m still single because I haven’t found or been found by a man that wants me as much as I want him that shares similar values, morals and lifestyle.
Excuses.
what does it mean when many sisters say lifestyle? because I believe that many brothers interpret it as constant trips, shopping, expensive restaurants, and doing IG worthy activities
The man you want, dont want you. You were not raised to be a wife therefore you dont qualify for these men. Its simple. A man that dont need money or advice from his woman, will not tolerate a sassy, slick talking, entitled, feminist, border-line lesbian. a 40 year old woman are only attractive to 50+ year old men.
@@kenonsavage my definition is my day to day. Gym, church, work, family, and friends. I have an active lifestyle and I don’t smoke of any kind. I don’t bar hop or club. I love hiking, wine tastings etc. that’s what I personally mean by lifestyle.
@@elsf thank you for that. I think many men align with that, but their personalities may initially be a little more reserved. So if you’re the more vibrant type, you might try breaking the ice
I've been knowing my woman since 14/15 (we 35/36 now) I grew up with this girl she a gift from God sadly most people will never experience this type of love because she ain't nobody I gotta settle for because we're "compatible"
Exactly
Anthony, you should have told her! Marriage takes effort and you have to communicate. You will forever be communicating wants and needs. Safe places are created ❤ Get your wife sir
Thank you. Ut's unfair to complain or judge a person based on the unmet need one didn't expressed. Most women are not intentionnally trying to make men feel unsafe or not needed. Many of them didn't even have the benefit of feeling safe and supported and had to become strong and hyper independant to survive. Being vulnerable and expressing needs in a loving way is also an act of maturity, courage and leadership.
I'm a natural encourager and supporter of my man’s accomplishments but some men want a professional cheerleader who cheers at the side of them all day every day. My ex would get a ton of encouragement and support from me but when it became an every day thing it was exhausting! I felt like he was a child showing me the pretty picture he drew in class and wanted me to affirm him DAILY. At that point, you need to heal your inner child and check to make sure you have a healthy need for validation and that there isn't childhood trauma driving your need for validation. Me personally I like support and for people to acknowledge me but I don't need it on a daily basis. I don't need it for every small thing and I need a man who can validate himself or receive validation from God and I can support him but being a cheerleader for an insecure man is the most exhausting job and I broke up with him because I couldn't see a life being a professional cheerleader or momma for a grown man. I can be a wife and I will make sure I celebrate my man and support him to the fullest so long as it's healthy!
That's a good point. We all have our own level of support that we need.
Yes, I dated a guy like that. Having to affirm him for everything was too exhausting.
If you truly love a person, it actually comes naturally.I find my self encouraging my husband everyday for everything because he simply makes me feel so loved and appreciated. I want him to feel appreciated too and for the lack of better words( I want him to feel the way he makes me feel) because it’s an amazing feeling
@@hourglass87 I am happy that you and your husband affirm each other. However, it is quite a different experience when the person is "seeking" affirmation about everything. That is what I meant when I said, "Having" to affirm someone about everything is exhausting. And the guy displayed this needy behavior early in the dating stage. I too have had experiences where I naturally did things for a man, but I responded that way because the guy treated me a particular way without me asking and I automatically wanted to reciprocate the behavior, just as you stated.
Yeah I completely understand how that can become overwhelming especially as early on as the dating stage and thank you
Often times it’s not “expecting” you to do it but “knowing” you can . Sometimes men translate things way differently. Amen to this lady speaking on speaking your needs; it’s often available if you just let it be known. Don’t lose something great due to ASSUMPTIONS.
Congratulations on your 40 under 40 accomplishment, Anthony🎉🎉🎉
It's not even a male thing, everyone wants to be celebrated when they accomplish something. Your ex is weird. I decided to go back to varsity for my post grad and when I graduated, I celebrated my accomplishment and let everyone around me join. Next month I'll probably be taking my nieces and son out and giving them money for their school accomplishments this year. I also think my upbringing contributed cause I was also celebrated by my parents and grandparents.
You must be truly broken to not understand this about people. Everyone wants to be acknowledged and appreciated especially for their accomplishments cause that takes hard work and dedication.
Your weird and emotionally soft asf too! Man Up to y’all exterior guys/ interior women.
You have to tell people HOW you want to be loved
I'm just realising this! We have to telll people
It’s always a blessing to be graced w/ Dr. Anita’s presence. Great wisdom on display. ❤
Less talk, more action. People been talking about this same problem for years…
@@jhariz7387 Great wisdom shared in this video. Peace & blessings on your journey.
That’s unfortunate. Even if someone accomplished something you’ve been doing, they still deserve to be congratulate. I mean not everyone out there are winning in this particular way.
Your needs are valid Anthony. I would ask the same from my partner. And I also agree with the Lady. Sometimes, we need to voice our needs so the other person can position itself to meet them. We can’t expect them to be mind readers 😅
Most successful relationships seem to have a strong friendship foundation, in that the couple actually and truly like each other as individual people. Those relationships have a stronger bond that creates a mutual level of commitment that other couples struggle to maintain and achieve…
"70 percent of marriage is friendship"...This is what I feel a lot of people don't understand. I think too many times people don't take the time to actually build and nurture a friendship with the person they are marrying and rather get caught up in other exciting things that distract you from what's really important and actually getting to know the other person.
As men we are not the best communicators...women can run circles around the average man when it comes to expressing ones self and communicating because of several reasons but its a skill that men must learn and cultivate and not shrink from or feel self conscious abt it...i tell women I deal with my emotions and and feelings all the time. If my feelings were hurt, or i may feel something was inconsiderate or unappreciative or whatever...and if they try to get defensive or try to make it look like im tripping I say this...."this is how i am feeling. There is no right or no wrong abt my feelings this is HOW I am feeling and this is why I am feeling this and lets address that before it becomes a bigger problem and Its not a personal attack. Its not abt you right now its abt me." Then I expound on the topic. We can talk it out from there. Im almost 50 also and nobody making me feel bad abt my feelings!
Even in what you said you've illustrated a problem that is inherent when dealing with women.
Many times they take a man's expression of his feelings as a personal attack. Then they the derail the conversation into how the man's feelings make THEM feel and the man never has a chance to really have his feelings/experience validated.
Going through this process repeatedly will teach men that it's not worth it to try to communicate their feelings to the woman.
A Man puts or crafts his feelings or desire into an artform and articulate the idea of value behind it.
So as to sell it to earn an income and exchange it for what he desires or needs.
How is that not being an excellent communication,still marvels me.
This continued hogwash of men not being good communicators is ...too lame.
Congratulations for doing your best, and becoming a better communicator, whether it's received well or not! As a woman I can tell you that many human feel attacked when their partner express unmet needs because the "negative" feedback is hurting them. I have seen men 1) lie and pretend to understand to escape a difficult conversation 2) invalidate or question the person's feelings 3) attack them or even worse pulling out the unmet needs they never expressed. Unlike some of the people in this thread said, its not a woman thing. It's a wounded/emotionally insecure human thing. But having people (men) already working on expressing their needs and feelings in a healthy way is already a good start. It then take either an woman that is able to receive such feedback, or the couple being able to work on that dynamic (maybe with external support like couples counselling) to make a relationship stand the test of time.
Most men desire that a woman nurture and encourage him. The woman that truly wants you will do it by default. You won’t have to tell her, regardless of where she is in life. We should communicate, yes. But, when it’s truly the one that wants you fr there’s certain things that won’t need to be said because they will automatically do them because they truly love you!
I TOTALLY concur! Being encouraging can go a LONG way! I wish I had experienced more of it...
But as Dr Anita implied, it's unfair to complain or judge a person based on the unmet need one didn't expressed. Most women are not intentionnally trying to make men feel unsafe or not needed. Many of them didn't even have the benefit of feeling safe and supported and had to become strong and hyper independant to survive. If people 1) were vulnerable 2) learned to express their needs 3) sought to understand before judging more relationships would be thriving. Being vulnerable and expressing needs in a loving way is also an act of maturity, courage and leadership. Being accountable has more of a transformative power than complaining.
A therapist asked to provide an example to ensure he wasn’t labeling, generalizing, catastrophizing or any other cognitive dissonance to the situation . It’s not an attack, she switched hats lol My therapist does this to me often to ensure I’m aware of the lens I place on an event
Dang, this is something to be considered! I see that even a successful man can use an emotional safe space with his partner.
That makes a lot of sense! More of these intersex conversations need to be had publicly so we can heal the wounded masculine globally.
Wow, being emotionally and validating with our friends is great practice! Never thought of it...
Thank you Anthony, As a woman, I struggle with sharing my emotions as well... Dr. Anita elaborate on that really well. 👍🏾
That emotional vulnerability is real. I think the strength of divine feminine energies is that we can be vulnerable enough to make a space for our partners. I agree that the best marriages should be able to be friends and intimate with exploration of nonsexual intimacy taken into account.
Until we’re ready to give more than receive we’re probably not ready.
I love her temperament and demeanor. Very nice voice and does not look any where near close to 50!!!
So my question back is did he ever express that to her… we all need to stop assuming that we each KNOW how to care for one another. We must teach each other how to love one another.
But do you really want to be with someone you have to teach to be kind, compassionate, empathetic, selfless and considerations others feelings? Most people would say"no".
@@elysiyah3364 I would bet if she is a financially successful person she has all those skills in her professional life and may not know how to transfer those skills in a relationship.
70% of a relationship is a friendship. That’s what lacking in the modern dating culture of transactional relationships.
I told my ex that I use to hate when my dad Called me stupid and that hurt me the most . One day we got into a argument mind you we’ve gotten into arguments before she had never called me stupid but she knew saying that would hurt me . I told her if you ever utter those words to me again I will leave you… I ended up breaking up with her shortly after amongst some other things.. then ofc I went back to default settings after a couple months tried getting her back but I’m thankful I didn’t… truly found Jesus I met her in a Pentecostal church.. now I go to none denominational ICC where they truly live out the gospel . I was broken and couldn’t pick women correctly.. I watched Kevin Samuel’s for practicals and found out a lot of what he was saying the Bible warns you in proverbs
Do not trust in men ("mankind"). Seek and trust in TMH instruction from the Holy Spirit.
Wow...totally love this vulnerability...being in a safe place and space in a relationship is such a PREMIUM NEED at this point in life. I 🤎 how Dr. Anita expresses this as "the language of need." Everyone is talking about "love languages" but still struggling to speak the languageS of their partner... 🤷🏾♀️...Great segment‼️🙏🏾‼️
We have come to a place where we all are simply trying to outdo each other which is straight from the spirit of the adversary, satan. We all need to be born again, submit ourselves to God's Spirit, and follow His lead so we can enjoy loving, nourishing, and fulfilling relationships. God is so able to accomplish what He has ordained for those that love Him.
Just listening to this snippet I instantly wanted to hang out with her. Going look for her podcast now…
“70% of the relationship is friendship”. Selah! I’m going to meditate that. Thank you for a wonderful and valuable discussion.
Go where your celebrated, Not where your tolerated.
Also, you gotta understand. We have to learn how to lead with love. We’ve been raised to feel that men are supposed to be this strong, resilient, non emotional being…so in return we have learned to feel men don’t need the same nurturing we give our children, our parents and our S/O’s. This is where healing that inner garden comes into play, cause it forces us to give unconditional love in ALL things. Just as we do with our children. Not saying it has to be childlike, just humble, open and transparent like Mike Todd says. ❤
What break your heart is expectations. Allow ppl be who they are.
That was one person who said that to you!
He is going for women that are as financially smart as him. He could marry down, a humble great woman that will gladly learn from him and treat him like a king.
I support you, Anthony! You are doing a great job and I love that not only talk but teach. ❤🎉👏🏾😊
This is really interesting. Taking note. Not really understanding the whole context or nature of all the conversations, but I heard "I believe in you". Which is seemingly important in a world that tells the Black man they can't. Never thought of it in the way he heard it (and perhaps she meant it the way he heard it). All that said, it is clearly important to be mindful or what we say and how we say it and to allow space for vulnerability. Thank you for sharing. Definitely has me thinking.
I love Dr. Anita!!! This has been a year for me to focus on being vulnerable with my friends and family and accept their vulnerability with me. Humanity can be so off-putting, but if Jesus made space for us, then I'm going to make space for us. My prayer and vision for 2024 is to dial in my inner circle and to have some friendships with Godly men, too. I realized I will never have a healthy relationship if I don't start out with a foundation of friendship, so I have to stop being scared of being friends with men and just be crystal clear on healthy boundaries.
I'm starting to believe that relationships are a waste of time.
No lies we get attacked and gas lighted like how dare we have feelings
Where in the Bible does it say wives are supposed to baby their husbands?
I applaud you for sharing this Anthony, but I challenge you to to be as open as you desire. What if you just bringing this one thing to her attention made her reflect and be willing to totally shift? Often times powerful successful people aren’t challenged, and your challenge could have helped her grow! Even if it wasn’t growth into marriage with you, someone needs to correct people in the moment or at least at some point so they can do better. Being supportive and nurturing doesn’t come naturally to every woman, but a good woman can recognize that and grow from the experience. ❤❤
I’m not married because I don’t want to get divorced again. You can’t get divorced if you don’t get married.
Brother, you have to examine what you have been pursuing! You have prioritized your 3 B's, and you're learning that they're other things that you value more than the 3 Bs!
Stay on your journey and be open!
Bro, your example of shawty making you feel some type of way because she expect you to be successful was very sensitive, which is ok BUT understand that you’re the problem not HER. You have to get a little emotionally tougher and this is from man to man! Peace.
Its really very liberating ❤
This was an excellent clip. I enjoyed the conversation back and forth between the both of you. Anthony, you seem to be a decent and genuine person. One day, you come together with the woman who is meant for you. 🌞
Thank you
I was having a conversation with some friends today about dating woes, and my guy friend expressed the desire to be with someone who goes under the surface, someone who can be a safe space. Things feel more complicated since we switched from the transactional-style marriages of the Old Testament to the eros-infused marriages that Paul encourages us about. However, I see the beauty in life partners being able to become each safe space, the person they can share their deepest, darkest thoughts with. Some people are looking for that in a sea of shallow seekers, I have hope that that deep love and understanding can be found in someone.
I feel the same way as you do.
Oh noooo!!! Yes we should support each other in relationships!! It’s common sense !!!
My God, this was so good! Thanks for sharing!
Love Language is Affirmation
I’m a safe space 😉
This is a great conversation!!!
Between Dr. Phillips book and “A Return to Love” by Marianne Williamson…. I’m learning to be venerable and heal my garden within ❤️
As soon as he said that he doesn't feel comfortable expressing himself and he feels attacked, her first reaction was "it's hard for me to believe that women are running around here blah blah blah". This is exactly what men are talking about. When we express our feelings it's never being taken into consideration and they negate our emotions. This lady is almost 50 without a ring; fellas don't try to express yourself to these women, it's no point.
In all fairness Anthony didn’t handle the situation correctly in my opinion. Yes her initial reaction was harsh but he made an assumption that she wasn’t a safe space. Had he actually expressed his feelings at that moment she may have given him what he was looking for. But you can’t expect a person to know how you’re feeling or what you expect from them with out setting those expectations then holding it against them when they don’t give you what you expect.
I'm proud of you!
Women on the macro don't hold space for men's feelings.
Your guest just demonstrated that when she felt the need to try to invalidate your and other men's experiences.
You laid your views and feeling out there (which she even told you she'd heard echoed by other men) and she basically said "I don't believe you. Prove it."
And then after you gave her a case study she tried to excuse it and make it about all of us instead of keeping the focus on men which was your original premise for the conversation.
Omg yes I saw that! She was trying to invalidate him by taking the focus off male experience. Another woman avoiding accountability.
women can and should do better in this area for sure, but men are not faultless on this issue either and i keep hearing brothers tell an incomplete story / half truths about this.
we keep telling women in a variety of ways that they're (overly) emotional and we're logical, but then want them to be mind readers on the occasion that we need emotional support. keep in mind that women receive many of the same msgs about men that we receive / believe about ourselves, msgs that keep us from embracing our vulnerability. yet we judge them more harshly for accepting those ideas which we are still unlearning.
men don't even hold space for men's feelings, but maintain high expectations for women to do so. a lot of men place an unfair burden on women in their lives, particularly their partners, to help them do the emotional labor that we haven't learned to do for ourselves or to give us the support we've not received from a range of other relationships (fathers, brothers, mentors and friends).
in terms of the specific example in this video, i think it was her job to challenge him. he was moving away from the personal / specific and moved into the general and started sharing a go-to script. i do this with my therapist a lot when i'm not comfortable talking about my pain. he always calls me out on it and asks for specific examples in my life, not general ideas about men vs women to hide behind. she listened and gave affirming gestures and sounds and didn't interrupt him. and then she gave cultural context as to why it shows up in the way it does and said she hopes as a community we build the capacity to make it safer for men to be vulnerable. therapists are supposed to bring you to greater self awareness and to help you access tools for navigating your problems. what would you like to have seen from her in that moment?
@Lil08103 Golden comment. So intelligently introspective. Your comment should be pinned
@@Lil08103 acceptance. Not trying to explain it away. Not trying to uphold the sisterhood instead of realizing that if a number of males, not just the one in front of her have detailed a similar experience, maybe there's some validity to what they're saying.
@@Lil08103 Beautifully articulated and so true! I, too, have a therapist and could understand Dr. Anita’s intent.
Wouldn’t it be beautiful if more couples did therapy together? I tried w/ my ex- he wasn’t open to it unless it was post-engagement. It’s unfortunate. We all have stuff and it’s okay. The more self-aware we are the better we can cultivate healthy relationships.
Nothing is wrong with encouraging your man, but no woman needs to feel that she has to constantly baby their man as this gets tiring. Therapy might be needed at that point. If women have to constantly encourage their men, who are encouraging the women?
Just as Anthony said, a lot of men try not to complain, so just her saying, "i can't believe women are just out there attacking men." Is enough to get men to shutdown, because, our thought process is that we can endure through the pain, and confiding in someone who seems to be struggling to empathize doesn't seem to be worth the effort.
To answer her question more directly, and give a better example:
While having a very emotionally raw discussion with a female family member (no yelling or cursing) in which we were discussing the ways in which she hurt me, she completely changed the subject to a story she heard third hand incorrectly about me and a woman i had recently broken up with, and tried to paint me as an evil person with no legitimate opinion worthy of being heard. That's an attack.
I've seen this type of bait and switch with women and men, when having heated debates. However, I've seen it more commonly with women, not because they're inherently bad, but because it's an effective tool if you can slip it into a debate undetected, and more women in my culture/community have more developed debate skills, and are much less satisfied with taking a verbal "L".
Anthony, that is a light bulb moment. Great conversation ❤
Anthony where are you meeting women/potential partners? I could help you meet someone genuine. Real talk!
With your example, I think maybe she (your ex) was saying "I know you are great so I expect you to do that."
Like a lot of men more specifically fathers want a "great job" for being and doing what you're supposed to do as a parent.
However, I get that sometimes encouragement is needed no matter how small the act.
A lot of women these days have moved so far up the corporate or self employed ladder and they make it known "they don't need a man" and it reflects in exactly what Anthony is saying. As black men its important to feel needed and when women can't understand that it makes it tough.
Amen!!!
To feel needed you have to be needed. Black males loudly proclaim everywhere they won’t do anything for women, won’t provide, help with the house, raise their kids or do anything. So what would a woman need you for?
But as Dr Anita implied, it's unfair to complain or judge a person based on the unmet need one didn't expressed. Most women are not intentionnally trying to make men feel unsafe or not needed. Many of them didn't even have the benefit of feeling safe and supported and had to become strong and hyper independant to survive. If people 1) were vulnerable 2) learned to express their needs 3) sought to understand before judging more relationships would be thriving. There are millions of men who managed to bring tremendous value and support to successful women (logistically, financially, spiritually and/or emotionally). But it takes one to be willing to overcome is ego and insécuritues and step up with love in the relationship, as a the leader he is supposed to be. The narrative of blaming the ambitious woman is a lazy shortcut way too many people are willing to take to escape accountability.
Yes, because Black Women have CODDLED BLACK MEN for DECADES and they’re tired and don’t want to hear the whining anymore. Go take your burdens to Non-Black Women, or your Homeboys, go learn to be friends with others. GO TAKE YOUR FEELINGS TO YOUR DADDIES OR THERAPIST OFFICE. 🤷🏾♀️
Black Women are NOT your free punching bags or free counselors or free therapists.
Well then I guess it's time for black men to catch up then!
As black people we have terrible emotion intelligence toward one another. But we can work well and successfully for a boss for 30 years that we don't particularly care for.
I don't care how successful a woman is, what she said to him about his accomplishment was DISRESPECTFUL and as a woman, I find it disgusting.
I don’t know. Being happy with yourself and remaining single is peaceful. It’s optional to let folks in for glimpses from time to time if one chooses to. The way the world is today and being a man, this the safe way to sanity.
To simply Affirm you
That’s real!
That's not a response I would have given you... honestly. Not a pick me..I'm just a positive/empathetic person.
Yeah I’m glad Dr Anita brought up friendship. Bc truly…a good friend would give you a cursory “congrats Anthony!” Like it’s not hard, it’s automatic when something good happens
This is good!!!
7:11 ...to be honest...I never knew that he was straight....this video has come as quite a surprise to me....anyway it doesn't matter. Love his content.
What? Lol. You must not listen to much of his content
The "expectations" girlfriend may have been jealous and competitive. This type of person will never be pleased. All accomplishments, by anyone, should be praised and celebrated.
She’s was TRIGGERED because she’s one of them from her own past and definitely single and not ‘there yet’ with this particular issue the brother had, believe power plays would run rife with this one! S/o to everyone in happy and healthy relationships!
And that @1:25 response is the EXACT the issue the brother was talking without having to even EXPLAIN it anymore, for those that saw what just happened saw it, for those that didn’t it went over ya head - the very dismissal of the man’s feeling towards an issue dismissed as ‘bs’ or ‘nonexistent’ from this narrow minded preschool teacher in the face looking individual who couldn’t conceive it in her ‘own mind’ others beside women are being done wrong lol, it’s been mentioned to her several times yet instead of being like ‘oh it must actually be a thing’ she goes to ‘I don’t believe that’ when someone OUTSIDE herself was is TELLING you how THEY feel - hope to God she’s ones therapist with that lack of wisdom and selective empathy!
He actually proved why she needed an example. He didn't even provide one. His woman didn't attack him for his feelings. She wasnt supportive enough and he decided not to share his feelings about that. Where is the attack? The therapist responded by telling him that he should have said something and men should learn to communicate by being vulnerable with each other first. How is she dismissing his feelings?
@@Lady_Danbury when he expressed how he felt about women not holding space for men's emotions she basically said "Ive heard that from men before, but I don't believe it. Prove it."
Meanwhile, if a woman says something about men or their experience it's "believe women"
The fact that she's heard it from multiple men before should give her a clue that their might be some validity to it.
@@AlexMinor Well the actual subject was about women using men’s emotions against them. That’s different. I think in this instance it was about clarifying vs disregarding. And the Dr was justified in that because he didn’t even provide a good example of what he is accusing women of.
I’m not saying it doesn’t happen. This was just an example that doesn’t make sense. The gf was negligent, but she didn’t attack him. To me it speaks to how men and women are on two different pages when it comes to communication and emotions. It’s hard to fix something when you don’t even understand what the problem is. That goes both ways.
@@Lady_Danbury why did he need to provide an example to have his thoughts/feelings even acknowledged?
You don't even see that you and the other women in the comments who are saying similar things are behaving in the same way the doctor was and not holding any space for us men who are saying "yo! You just did the exact thing that he was talking about" because you don't think that it's a thing.
You keep proving our point for us.
@@AlexMinor This is interesting. I understand now, and you have a point. Us women can sometimes come off as rejecting how you feel by not immediately just accepting the statement without further details. So I get it. So here’s the thing. Us women like details. Even if a woman friend tells us we have offended them and we can’t see how, we well want to talk it out and ask for further details. It’s not always an ask to prove it, but more like “show me where I went wrong” so I can fix it. We do that to each other as well. I do see how it can appear that we are looking to discount the statement instead of trying to understand. And to be honest sometimes it is that. That’s a people thing. But most often it’s just trying to understand what I guess you all think should already be understood. Like if I ask right now, how do you think she should have responded, it’s really me trying to understand vs of me saying you’re wrong. Thanks for the respectful exchange as well. Sometimes the comment section can go a bit left. 😀
Man you are a man who has made something for himself. Stay single. I applaud that more black men are understanding the single route is the best route for us who are doing well for themselves. 🙏🏾
Anthony could be in a relationship if he wanted too, he's not attracted to the women that align with him character/personality wise. Think about this, the man has single women on his platform all the time that he agrees with on god, finances, relationships, and community. Why haven't they dated?
@@facelessman5362 EXACTLY!!!!
@@tatianadaniel3569 I'm convinced all the great single black folks in the community refuse to date each other for the silliest of reasons. I guess we'd rather try to change someone to be what we want smh.
Exactly correct. Men should be celebrated for the good they do. So what if it's expected, u should still get "good job for doing the right thing and doing the best you can". Let's be honest, it's not easy doing the right thing and when a man does, he should get the applause for that.
Do yall applaud women for doing the right thing: example, not cheating on her man?
@@tatianadaniel3569 I'm a woman and I get congratulated when I have an accomplishment. If men and women are going to get put down because of poor behavioral choices, which is an everlasting conversation it seems on RUclips, then yes we should be applauded.
@@archellebranch8517 I'm asking do you think men know to applaud their woman for not cheating? Or do you think they believe its EXPECTED of us to not do that?
Being a man and "doing the right thing" is no more difficult than being a woman takes with making the same calls.
This is real
Youll be surprised of how many women dont have the skills of communicating with there man.
This is the struggle that every man goes through. We don't share our emotions for fear of being ridiculed. We keep up a strong frame and deal with the emotions privately. To all the gents out there, I pray that you stay strong. We need y'all
Its the emotional need for me....and that vulnerability is OK.
You full of crape Anthony. You come across all
These beautiful ladies on
Your podcast/youtube channel who’s single… why are you still single
Men are not robots , they are human and still have feelings and emotions.
This is healthy
If anyone -- man or woman -- cannot cheer someone on, it's a red flag narcissistic trait.
It’s too expensive and I’m an aunt too ya
Bro, the captain of the ship can’t complain. It’s just that simple. Express your feelings to men.
She just attacked him for saying that women attack men.
❤
Most women who earn more are naturally disrespectful. Especially if they’re older than their male partners. She was never with Anthony for his ability to be a provider cause clearly she dominated that part of the relationship. Idk what women of that caliber respect!
Most women don’t understand what disrespect to a man is
Its a NEED
Wow … to say that’s nothing is wild period!! And boy needs to not be in the lexicon period!
It's not all woman,
Anthony like your example of your nieces and newphews..... everyone needs encouragement ♥️
You will find that woman just keep chasing God and he will send you the helper made for you I pray jesus name amen
I do want to say this I’m getting a divorce because said I work to much. At the age of 47. I am really ok with being single. It a lot more this.
Sounds like you didn't prioritize your marriage or make time for your wife/family.
Im single because its hard to find a good woman faithful intelligent woman who is attractive.
One who doesnt have a masculine looking face or obese body..
We exist. Don’t lose hope😊
@@LadyK007 lol haha yes right...something else is wrong then.
And what do you look like?
@@missj5564 And how does he act and what is his character like?
@@elysiyah3364 Exactly.
why is there the picture pf chanel ambrose on the video , lol thats why i came on here 👀
You got catfished😂
Lol, it's giving Thanksgiving conversation.
My brother, she still has a messsed up mindset. How most successful black men escape this unappreciative behavior is, they marry out of their race. Period, this is why black wealth leaves the black community, the heart get tortured in the end, so you go choose yhe freedom that other communities offer.
Marriage is friendship
My brother, she still has a messsed up mindset. How most successful black men escape this unappreciative behavior is, they marry out of their race. Period