Это видео недоступно.
Сожалеем об этом.
Why Do Fearful Avoidants Get Into Rebound Relationships
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 15 авг 2024
- 7-Day Free Trial: university.per...
PDS Sale Code: WITHYOU -- 25% off All 3, 6, 12 month memberships and individual course purchases - university.per...?el=youtube
In this video, I talk about why Fearful Avoidants get into rebound relationships, this doesn’t mean that they all do, but if you find that’s the case, this video will help you understand the four different patterns that might push them to a rebound relationship. Enjoy!
PDS 90 Day Challenge Group:
/ pdsmember
Do you know what your Attachment Style is? Take my quiz to find out now, and begin healing your relationships! Click here: attachment.per...
Lastly, if you’re interested in shorter form content and tips, follow my Instagram page! @personaldevelopment_school
I post every other day, and you'll find some completely new content there :)
Thank you for watching!
This is frightening for the other partner because every relationship gets at a place of being precieved as boring and/or stagnant .
"Some of them stay single for decades" 100% accurate. As FA, This is me. I can't do rebounds.
I am the same! I noticed that I do seek to connect or re-connect with people after a break up, but just for friendships, never rebounds.
@@ildik9772 Makes sense.... I also don't like to hurt others because I know how it feels. The thought of rebounds doesn't feel good to me and it doesn't benefit the other person in most cases.
@@Delgado-ot4lq Exactly. I just...don't like the concept of rebounds because I do really value relationships. So I couldn't bear hurting someone else neither.
Also I realize that after break up I seek for connections because I invest a lot in the relationships, and when it is over I feel disconnected with anyone else so I am wishing to get in touch with someone, but despite that I would never consider rebounds.
So based on what Thais said this is more of an FA leaning dismissive?
@@ildik9772 Correct. I do lean more to the DA side of the spectrum based on my results.
@@Delgado-ot4lq I lean more to anxious based on the test (FA and AP are the same actually) so it is a bit interesting.
They can’t be alone with their grief. They’re avoiding themselves and you.
Pls dont ignore my msg. Im going tru this experience now. He is in rebound bcos I didnt msg him after he reached out after our 2nd breakup. He started a rebound within 4 weeks posted on all social media A/Cs.
Then I msgd him saying I was afraid to msg him bcos of his mood swings ,fury. Bcos he was furious & said not to msg before our breakup. Then when I explained he was responded so calm, wit care, showed he read all, put likes, sent me my bday video he took, that he wont get mad if i msg. But he wont chat. He canged fotos of his orginal WA & insta after my msgs.
He has hacked my WA too since he reached out bcos he cant bear if Im in NC, so he put various happy stuff when i msg my friends abt him or ask abt him from his bro.
But after my msgs i stayed away from WA for 2 weeks, so now he has removed his profile or may b have put a foto with his rebound (hidden),he has done it in past too if I wont login to WA 1 day even ,
he remove his photo/ profile.
if he is in a rebound Y he gets angry,hurt when I stay away, Y he keeps in touch with me without communication? He wont block me, ignore my msgs , he waits for my msgs, he doesnt like when I distance him even now, when im away from WA.
We loved eachother so much since 2022, but with push-pull, on-off love from him (he has FA patterns & signs 100%). Y he comes back to me whenever I giveup on him ,try to move on even he breakup or rebound? Am I special to him? Does he truly love me still?
(He said he loved me, did all truly, not fake before he brokeup (took space) 2nd time.
This time also he misunderstood my silence as rejection , abandonment. But now he is in between ,but still its 1 month for rebound if he started 1. Will he get fedup of her & when (the time)?
FA here. I do push people away when I’m hurting. 🥺
After u r healed r u going back to ur true love (ex)? My 1 did it few times, whoes now in a rebound bcos he thought i rejected him after he came back recently , but still checking on me, responding to my msgs, hurts, gets upset still if im away, wont block me. :(
After msgn my FA bf (ex) that I didnt reject or abandon him, I went NC for 1 month. I started a new WA, bcos he has hacked my orginal WA. He has checked it daily in my NC & found my new WA number from 1 of my chats. Then he has told his best friend to msg to it.. I dont know Y he does as that if he has a rebound, dont know whether its over now. But dont know Y he wont chat wit me, bcos of rebound or bcos of his exams. I uninstalled the new WA, but still Im in NC. ❤️🩹🙏
Getting over a relationship-while still in it. Avoiding relationships for years. I honestly thought that was just me. All of this so spot on. Thanks again Thais 😀
Scary accurate. I realize how she does this. She's followed me all my life and recorded every conversation I've had. That's how she is able to tell my life story without ever meeting me
Lol 😂
I am very FA but it takes me years to get into a relationship in the first place, so getting into a rebound would be impossible for me 😅 I always wonder how people find another person so fast after a break up 🤷🏼♀️
Same.
Would you ever reconsider the ex?
Me too!
@@kernalmasta I would maybe...
@@kernalmasta I would say no. Because I have too many negative emotions associated to that person
You should really touch upon FA's getting/escaping into polyamory, as it's solely missing from your channel.
I came here to be attacked and was not disappointed. 👌😭
Hahaha this kills me 😂
Same! Lol
Haha 🤣🤣🤣 same!
😂 😂 😂
The idea is to recognize your patterns and fix them. If she wounded you, what do you need to address?
I guess my FA ex made me an FA lol, she rebounded in a month after a year and a half but never let me know until 6 months later. She was talking to me the entire time and trying to get back with me and then just out of the blue, updated the FB saying she’s been in a relationship that whole time. Crushed me. I’m absolutely terrified to attempt dating again.
oh thats horrible im really sorry :( my ex was with me 3 weeks ago crying telling me how much he loved me but couldnt be with me still meeting up a few days later kissing me and hugging me then he told me a few days ago he has met someone, im devestated and dont understand it at all, esp when he told me through the 9 months we were together he finds relationship hopping disgusting and how after me he would be waiting a while b4 wanting to find anyone
Very interesting and insightful. I was in a rebound relationship with someone who I think had FA tendencies. She had broken up from her previous relationship. It was a very intense relationship (I was extremely attracted to her) and when it broke down - she still had feelings for her ex - I ended up having some very delayed feelings of loss when I realised she wasn’t coming back. Thank you for this video which might give some insight into what was going on in her head.
Watching these videos show exactly why I won't ever let anyone in again. .. I was a rebound. 100%, soon after he got over his ex he left me for another female. He's happy in love and posting with her ... A month after breakup... I didn't know until one day he just said , "I no longer want my ex." I broke it off, how could you use me? .. two years of lies and manipulation.. it was all fake ... What a waste. I try to, "heal," but, For what? Just for someone new to pretend for 2 years again? Gtfoh! It's a trap. Build walls and protect yourself at all cost. Soon as you let someone get a ounce of you they already own your emotions and thoughts. Don't confide in anyone, it just makes you look crazy... Sad part I don't even wish him bad... Because I was the idiot that couldn't accept the red flags as red flags!
They always win. He's happy. I'm traumatized. This isn't me.. I am love...he's enjoying life and I'm questioning my self worth of love.. even though I know I'm amazing.. I am someone not deeply affected by things either. So I am highly triggered. They always win. They fall into the arms of anyone. They win, and smile in your face. Block you like you're the villain. Speak bad on your name.. just complete narcissist. It's sickening. You can't sleep, can't think.. because you realize all this time no one ever loved you. No one never had interest in who you really were... And stop with the, "you'll find someone who loves you." B's. They was telling me that before I met him. I don't think I wanna meet anyone else. EVER!!! KEEP THE BS AWAY!
@@CrazyBunniePanda hang in there :/ I’m going through it right now as well.
@@CrazyBunniePanda feel you. AP recovering for FA who ghosted me blocked no reason after 2 years of seemingly a happy relationship....not sure if rebounding but yeah intuition says yeah.
@@Juju-tw7we girl, YES! I blocked him off everything… He found my email through an old message I sent him a long time ago.. which I forgot.. He messaged me a month after that comment above, after being in his new, “happy,” relationship… he also was calling me on fake numbers, and having his friends harass me… btw he’s engaged to her and worried about me… FUNNY!! NOT!! BLOCKED on email now… changed my number.. and now planning to move and get a new car. I want nothing to do with him… and that past.. sickening… completely sickening. I’m still traumatized!!
Can you do a video on the type of fearful avoidant that doesn't rebound (e.g. stays single for ten years, like you said)?
I will bring this video suggestion back to Thais and the team :)
-PDS team member
She talks about that a little in this video
Stay away from anyone who’s a FA !
I can’t believe my FA ex is going out and seeing people already, less than a month
My FA was going out and seeing ppl after an hour we broke up
Remember, they will never have a healthy relationship or family. U will, because u watch these vids because u are smart and found out their mental illness
Been patiently waiting for this one!
This is true. My FA ex told me she was struggling to be vulnerable with me again. Our communication was poor in our relationship about needs and she felt she couldn't trust me in the end. When she text me she was all lovey dovey. But as soon as she saw me she shut down. Became very cold n distant. Sometimes non responsive staring into space leading up to the break up. Then she broke up with me via text after 2 years saying she would be able to meet my wants n needs long term. We didn't really discuss what they were. She felt she needed to be alone. Then 5/6 weeks into nc she dated someone else and was exclusive after 4 weeks of dating. So got the intimacy from someone else cause fears are not online yet. I wanted to work things out. Total gut punch. 👎🏻
It’s scary how on point this is
Can you make a video on the differences between attractive, attraction, infatuation and having feelings for someone?
Before you waste your precious time watching videos on rebound relationships, make sure if you ex wasn't cheating on you already before he dumped you. It happened to me. he was dating someone else, got into a relationship with this new woman while still on a relationship with me. He only had the courage to dump me when I asked him if he wanted to be together at all. Two months into the relationship, they are living together and have made Wills in contemplation of marriage.
FA learning and growing lmfaoo would love to see that yes someone comes and meets there one need but what they dont see is all the other needs your partner was offering becuz they were too busy fault finding.
I was in a relationship for a year. She was the anxious avoidant one. I’m very secure so I had no trouble giving her space when she needed it. I didn’t feel our relationship was threatened if she needed her own time. We started planning our future, marriage, kids, everything. Then she all of a sudden breaks up with me. She couldn’t tell me why. She always told me through the breakup that I was perfect, the only one that seemed like I understood her. I was the only one that never judged her for who she was, I was never mean to her when she got distant, I was ok with her needing her own space, etc. but then immediately gets into another relationship. I just feel so worried about her, it seems a bit self destructive in her part and it’s hard for me to just sit and accept things when I worry she’s just trying distract herself instead of processing how she actually feels. This sucks
In my opinion, it seems she doesn't know how to value a healthy relationship and took you for granted. From what I've learned healthy relationships seem boring to a fearful avoidant because they like high emotion and passion.
Also the planning of the future mightve triggered them since they are scared of commitment. Don't be so hard on yourself and move on, you'll definitely find someone who you deserve to have a family with
Same here. Went no contact. Reconnected slowly after that. Just bumped into my FA ex, who has been courting me again, with his new rebound girlfriend.
I met Del ..He was so romantic and kind and sweet our first date ..he was talking about what his ex did to him...I thought he was opening up...I thought it was going to be something special with us by the 3rd date he got scared and accused me of moving to fast. I was devastated ha barely texted me and Now nothing I told him to be by himself I'm so hurt....I let him go with kindness and understanding..but I'm so hurt
If someone is talking about their ex on the first date that they have with you then that is a huge red flag that they are not over it. You should not see them again.
My FA left recently. I felt it was coming on for several months.
We were engaged and had been together for 7 years.
She took over as my business manager and grew to feel unappreciated. No matter what I told her she was appreciated
She won’t accept she is a fearful avoidant.
She started a new Facebook page within a month and friended several guys.
Is she over me or numbing her feelings?
Is she attention seeking?
Trying to make me jealous?
I am truly shattered.
Omg that's totally my person. I love her so much and probably walking away.
Whenever I think it can't get worse... (FA myself but very shy and not a rebounder)
Why does my fearful avoidant ex of 3 months have extremely low standards for her rebound (possible monkey branch). New guy has cheated with several women over the past 2 weeks... mutual friends have provided her with evidence and she doesn't even seem to care... If a girl even looked at me, she used to lose her mind.
Can/do fearful avoidants rebound after being very emotionally dependent on their partner, then breakup, and rebound in a short amount of time, and then eventually go back to their ex or want to go back to their ex after realizing the rebound isn’t right for them?
Following
no idea but hope so
@Wei Li bro fuckin run
My FA bf always did this. Now again in a rebound bcos he misunderstood that i rejected him, moved on bcos I didnt msg him when came back recently , but still doesnt like if I stay away or giveup on him, still keeping my photos , videos , the songs he shared 4 me, wont block me or hurt me & expecting msgs from me time to time.
She never told me her needs
Hi! This video was really helpful. I have one request, will you make a video about the enmeshed/people pleasing DA soon? I really want to know more on this topic since my boyfriend is a very people pleasing DA and I just can't seem to connect with him, he gets very angry/hurt and withdraws a lot.
I know Thais has made this video (below) and it includes people pleasing DA's.... were you wanting to see a detailed video on people pleasing DA's?
ruclips.net/video/2eg4M_m0Acs/видео.html
-PDS team member
@@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Hi Thank you for your reply! And yes I meant a more in depth video on that topic, thank you!
@@queenofseasons4061 okay! I will bring this video suggestion back to Thais and the team :)
@@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Thank you! :)
I second this request, thank you!
Hope all ya get the help u so badly need I was in a relationship with a FA/DA and it was horrible! I understand y she acted the way she did...she's a damaged little girl that's 33 YRS OLD! smh GET HELP!
Hell mines 57 😭
Exactly ! Exactly ! Exactly ! True
Soooo who’s ready for a FA dating app?
I’ll just be FA with another FA.
What can go wrong? 😆
Hahah extreme volatile relationship incoming..😅
@@zaraz3425 don’t tempt me with a good time. 😂
@@rosterdam7198 hahaha yeah, our subconsious mind would definitely enjoy it🤣
Count me in lol
Can tell you, heaven and hell
It's like you're talking about me.
How do you know if you’re a FA rebound? Not sure the timeline of her last relationship. Everything was great until she suddenly pushed me away.
Think my ex FA has done nothing other than rebound relationships since her marriage failed 20 years ago. She only told me about the guy before me but her deactivation slow fade was so slick I'm convinced she has gone through the process several times before.
YES i want to know!
Spot on 👌
I'm married 20 year divorce i did everything wrong in the breakup. 6 kids she isn't with someone and fearful avoidant. I felt out of love in unappreciated. She felt unloved not taken care of in the bedroom because I felt unappreciated. Do they ever come back? I need to save this if I can she shows all signs of getting together but then pulls back but I didnt give space like I should have. We have had sex back of the car she even called 3 weeks ago wanted to reconcile and ghosted me. I need help I need to help my family.
Bro - you gotta go no contact, and let her truly miss you. Up to 2 months’ish. If she still wants sex with you it’s probably salvageable.. but once that love is gone she will never get it back. So don’t smother her yet work on urself keep looking up attachment style videos learn all u can.
This is so me and my ex that we just broke up 3 months ago, word from word she jumped to a guy that had been orbiting her because I wasn’t fulfilling her needs. She’s still my best friend and we hang out and she wants me to stay over and sleep there in another room and she does have feelings for me still but she wants to experience life. I don’t understand
Dude get out.
Run
Is there any chance in reality to get a Fearful Avoidant Ex back? Together 6 years - she has struggles making relationships with friends (she has 0 friends) so I would assume it will be similar to her connecting with someone new. We were still connected breaking up, but she entered a time of her life with depression and needed to "find herself"
hey nick, hope you are doing well, your comment described my case very well, i am 7 months into the same situation as you...you could explain it better even than myself... every word resonates ....if you want to get in contact it will be nice to get some opinion and clarity from you , if not, is also ok... hope things are better on your side.
@@Rauly84 Any updates? how are you two with your exes /FA
@@Juju-tw7we it's over ... and I will never go back ...
@@Rauly84 :( oh sorry to hear. what happened? did they find someone else or did you just decide to move on...and they never reached out?
Does rebound work for FA? Well, I had been together with a very deep connection with an FA for 7 years. I’m not sure whether this is rebound, but he was forced to marry someone else in an arranged marriage. Would that work for FA? Can he fall in love with the new person? It was less than two months he replaced me with his new partner in marriage, after 7 years relationship with me. Please help me for this 😭 His parent(mom) is a narcissist
Lmao this describes my past perfectly
You look like my FA ex LOL Love from Aus