why I love being single and alone

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  • Опубликовано: 1 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 535

  • @bigcheech1937
    @bigcheech1937 Год назад +465

    Honestly, I’ve only been unhappy in relationships…every time I’m single it’s rainbows and butterflies. I looove my single life 😂

    • @crow-vz5lx
      @crow-vz5lx 9 месяцев назад +23

      I agree. I remember that in life, I always thought that I had to be in one, and that was the" right" thing to do, but in every relationship I've been in, the moment i started it I felt trapped,and unhappy.
      The moment I gave myself a chance, OMG It's literally the happiest time in my chance.
      It's not because I can go off and be a Playboy. No. Im not like that. I just like doing my own things, calling my entire schedule. Only relying on myself. I've focused on my career for several years. I'm way farther now, making more money,I have a great work environment. And an even bigger future ahead of me.
      I'm happy,truly and honestly happiest being single AND alone. That's just me.

    • @bigcheech1937
      @bigcheech1937 9 месяцев назад

      @@crow-vz5lx Exactly bro 🙏🏾
      I built a Software Company myself after my last relationship because I just didn’t have the hassle and the emotional turmoil of relationships….
      Maybe there is a right one down the line. But for now, Self Love rocks 😌

    • @Niwdalg786
      @Niwdalg786 6 месяцев назад +8

      Same here🎉😂

    • @Trexuu
      @Trexuu 5 месяцев назад +6

      I'm 20 never been in relationship and I don't want to. None of my 4 friends (whos are also 20-21 years old) have ever had a girlfriend. It's peaceful.

    • @bigcheech1937
      @bigcheech1937 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@Trexuu You’re young my brotha so that’s impressive. Keep up the good work. There is nothing wrong with women but you have to attract the right one. She finds you but first you must love yourself completely and have your own sense of Self Validation. Once you’re 100% in your power, then you should get a relationship because at that point you’ll attract the best girl for you. It all starts with you. Cheers 🥂

  • @paulnilsson3058
    @paulnilsson3058 7 месяцев назад +195

    I am 53 years old. I have always lived alone and I like it.

    • @MatthewJohnston-wc3zm
      @MatthewJohnston-wc3zm 2 месяца назад +15

      I'm 52m and I've always lived alone and like it too

    • @RTA6226
      @RTA6226 2 месяца назад +15

      I'm considerably older than you guys and I've lived alone ever since I completed college and got a job. I have loved every minute of it!

    • @Kristoferwitha_k
      @Kristoferwitha_k Месяц назад +3

      Im trying to get there at 45 but i think its gonna come from even more pain until i just dont ever want it again instead of jist picking that out of already being happy

    • @anthonypetrozzelli5429
      @anthonypetrozzelli5429 Месяц назад

      I​@@Kristoferwitha_k

    • @PraveenSrJ01
      @PraveenSrJ01 Месяц назад +1

      Me too as someone turning 41 on Sunday October 6

  • @robertcarter384
    @robertcarter384 9 месяцев назад +240

    I unfortunately think to many people are narcissistic. My heart is to pure to deal with to many people. Being single, I’ve save money & my mental health

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  9 месяцев назад +20

      Me as well

    • @directorchris2
      @directorchris2 Месяц назад

      Try Rapping 2:45 ...Yoy R Machine gyn Moyth

    • @ALESSIA20121
      @ALESSIA20121 Месяц назад

      Same here

    • @emanuelmota7217
      @emanuelmota7217 Месяц назад +4

      too

    • @stevemann1299
      @stevemann1299 Месяц назад

      I love these Chad's making these kind of videos like click bait..knowing they will have all the weak men patting them on the back.

  • @MrHabs66
    @MrHabs66 Месяц назад +51

    Married at 40, divorced at 50. I’m 58 now & retired. I will never be in another relationship again. I’ve never been happier. The peace & quiet in my house is truly addictive. Stay single, fellas.

    • @RobertGarcia-wb4hy
      @RobertGarcia-wb4hy 12 дней назад +4

      It's easy to say "stay single, fellas" when you're 58 and divorced. But when you were in your 30's, you were looking for a relationship...

  • @innavision1920
    @innavision1920 Год назад +73

    The fact is, spiritually, we are all we have. Yes you can link up with people who have like minded interests and share a similar purpose. You can do things to make it work and it can be a generally positive relationship. These are all good things. But the good times do not last indefinitely. The the reality is, you are the main character of your life, nobody is going to take that role for you. Yes devoting to a family is incredibly beautiful and fulfilling of an experience. But if you are not fulfilled first within your own space while alone, nothing life brings will fill that void. I think the more spiritually inclined you become with a love for truth, and also the more integrated on your retention path you are as a man, you realize the world of relationships is basically 90% mind games and a waste of time/energy. The race and chase toward relationship goal posts are largely motivated by ego and desire. It could all be so simple, but this world makes it incredibly complex. So the smartest way to win is to not play into it.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад +5

      beautifully stated.

    • @mestizajeu.s.a501
      @mestizajeu.s.a501 10 месяцев назад +1

      I'm 33 and single bro

    • @js77z
      @js77z 5 месяцев назад +3

      I'm 42, a single female who has always been alone. Yep, never once had a boyfriend. I've definitely tried, but I just haven't found anyone that feels even remotely right for me. I can't help but feel sad about it though. I kind of wish I could have a relationship, have it go terriblely wrong, and then maybe I'll appreciate always being alone, lol

  • @waedjradi
    @waedjradi 7 месяцев назад +130

    Whenever I reminisce on a great day I had. It is never one that involves another person.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  7 месяцев назад +9

      Same

    • @mattd.8945
      @mattd.8945 Месяц назад

      I'm so happy to hear I'm not the only one. People will say you're a freak if you talk like this

    • @aleksejjovanovic986
      @aleksejjovanovic986 26 дней назад

      I have had great days with my self or with my best friend. Thats about it.

  • @windyacresway
    @windyacresway Месяц назад +29

    Im 55 live alone and have zero interest in modern women.I enjoy my peace and comfort.

  • @jpgiles1725
    @jpgiles1725 Год назад +127

    This video hit home for me. I thought I was alone in this situation. My last girlfriend was a year and a half ago. After the little depression of losing her, Ive been the happiest ive ever been being single. I go to amusement parks by myself. i sit on my couch on a friday night have a few beers and watch a movie. Ive only slept with one person since the break up. Even chasing girls doesn't really interest me at this point. The thought of trying to figure out a good date, when to text or not text, when to try and make a move, should i make a move. It just seems draining to me. I feel like my whole thoughts on being single was expressed through this video. My guy friends in relationships tell me all the time. "Dude, you're single, if i was single id be hooking up with girls left and right. Thats what you should do" I just think nah, id rather play guitar, or watch a sports game, Hang with at home by myself with the fur babies 😂.
    Im glad jm not weird. Ive really come to enjoy the man that i am.

    • @davetheblessedguy3698
      @davetheblessedguy3698 3 месяца назад +7

      That’s great dude for real ❤️

    • @Jacky06
      @Jacky06 2 месяца назад +4

      I'm the same & I'm female. Enjoying the freedom. 😉

    • @Priceyyyyy
      @Priceyyyyy Месяц назад +1

      This would be cool if you were actually building a cool life for yourself but it seems like you just fill up your time with loser activities like drinking alone and going to amusement parks so it ends up just being sad

    • @jpgiles1725
      @jpgiles1725 Месяц назад +11

      @@Priceyyyyy I bought a house, and paid off credit card debt during my time of being a "loser". I enjoy going to amusement parks and having fun.
      In your opinion, what would be building my life up since you know me so well
      What if I think going to amusement parks and kicking back some beers is a cool life.

    • @nitehook
      @nitehook Месяц назад +2

      @@jpgiles1725 they are projecting. we dislike in others the very things we despise within ourselves.

  • @YanjuL-y5n
    @YanjuL-y5n 3 месяца назад +57

    your perspective is spot on. Society has brainwashed so many people. Once you have hobbies you are passionate about and goals ; being single is peaceful. modern dating is also messed up

    • @RubenWalsh-iv5ik
      @RubenWalsh-iv5ik Месяц назад

      Millenials and Gen Z are mostly transactional. Thats why being friends is almost impossible for youngs people. Its sad but its just. You dont know or want to learn to Love.

  • @PK-zq8qp
    @PK-zq8qp Месяц назад +28

    I was married twice both wives cheated now being alone is peaceful no drama

    • @markuchiha7737
      @markuchiha7737 12 дней назад

      Don't do it again women deserve less

  • @bronks1200
    @bronks1200 5 месяцев назад +91

    It’s weird. I’ll see my friends angry complaining about they’re wives like they can’t stand it. Yet they always trying to fix me up. I’m like bros if ur that miserable why do u want me to be? I’m content. the debt, risk and pain of a relationship is just not worth it.

    • @silverdale3207
      @silverdale3207 3 месяца назад +15

      They want you to be as miserable as them, then you have something in common.

    • @brentie2604
      @brentie2604 3 месяца назад

      What do they say to your comment? It would be interesting to hear their response.

    • @vadim6385
      @vadim6385 2 месяца назад +6

      Misery loves company

    • @TakaShiGUREEDO
      @TakaShiGUREEDO Месяц назад +3

      Same with alcoholics. They complain about that and RIGHT AFTER THAT ask me if I want to drink

    • @halcyonzenith4411
      @halcyonzenith4411 27 дней назад +2

      Misery loves company, it’s a well worn saying for good reason.

  • @johnnybrix5308
    @johnnybrix5308 8 месяцев назад +21

    I dont get the obsession over relationships and marriage. I feel like id only do it because everyone else is...which makes me confused because im not really obsessed or feel the urge to get into a relationship. Im already happy, never feel heartbroken or anything.
    Not saying i would say no to relationship...i just dont get the obsession over it
    I feel like there is something much bigger than this world...

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  8 месяцев назад +7

      You’re not alone my friend. You’re on the path to Awakening.

    • @BlackRose369.
      @BlackRose369. Месяц назад

      Normal reality feels dull compared to the dmt realm and altered states of consciousness

  • @NancyBuckley-nu8hc
    @NancyBuckley-nu8hc 4 месяца назад +55

    I was married for 34 years once, and I missed him every time he was not around. That was a wonderful relationship. We worked together too so we were together a lot. He passed away in 2015, and I still miss him. I'd love to have that kind of relationship again. I know it's a very rare to find.

    • @twistedtitan5485
      @twistedtitan5485 3 месяца назад +5

      Condolences on his passing a Good God fearing mN is very hard to find.

    • @Mary-vr3xz
      @Mary-vr3xz 2 месяца назад +5

      Don't desire it too much. Focusing yourself on your desire for a relationship will only make you feel like something is lacking, and you will get into a scarcity mindset. As a result of that, you might settle for less and you will not be happy in the long term. Love this season of your life as a widow first...I am a young widow myself, and I may not fully understand your situation, but I hope and pray that you will find contentment in your singleness while waiting for the right man.
      You don't want to be desperate... you will lose self-respect and self-worth..it is not worth it.
      Sorry about your loss. My heart goes out to you.

    • @NancyBuckley-nu8hc
      @NancyBuckley-nu8hc 2 месяца назад

      @@Mary-vr3xz Thank you for your encouraging words. I appreciate your concern and your edification.

    • @Mary-vr3xz
      @Mary-vr3xz 2 месяца назад +3

      @NancyBuckley-nu8hc Nancy, are you a Christian?
      My widowhood is the greatest blessing i have ever experienced. It put me in the situation where I felt helpless and hopeless and in a position where my empty cup could also be filled. It was my faith in Christ that allowed me to regain my strength and learn about my true self-worth and value. What I have lost is nothing in comparison to what I've gained as a widow because of my faith journey. I still long for a lifelong relationship with a man, but I am content at this season of my life.
      Keep growing. Don't stop learning new skills. Keep the faith.
      Take care. God bless you. I will pray for you.

  • @DominicDixon-rp8jd
    @DominicDixon-rp8jd 8 месяцев назад +132

    I don't wanna get married or have kids

    • @Gone7712
      @Gone7712 4 месяца назад +6

      Same with me

    • @johnmichaelmondigo-mb5wi
      @johnmichaelmondigo-mb5wi 2 месяца назад +4

      Same here😊

    • @raisa_cherry35
      @raisa_cherry35 2 месяца назад +4

      Same but I wished I weren't living in a conservative society 😒

    • @doctorskull8197
      @doctorskull8197 Месяц назад +5

      I’m an average 70 year old guy. Married at 59. No kids. Just was not interested.

    • @PaulFerguson-t2x
      @PaulFerguson-t2x Месяц назад +2

      @@DominicDixon-rp8jd Good decision

  • @MyForeverPerson
    @MyForeverPerson 7 месяцев назад +46

    I’m a woman 39 living in San Diego and I’ve spent 15 years trying to find someone, it never works out and its sooooooooooo exhausting.
    I am with you here. Staying single is a way of a more peaceful life

    • @Anonymous-f5v
      @Anonymous-f5v 2 месяца назад

      Are you happy?
      Are you financially good?

    • @GangdamStyle20
      @GangdamStyle20 26 дней назад

      That's crazy. And this as a women? I mean it's know when you are online or go to a bar you get bombarded with men. Or is that the myth? I have been online for a month but immediatelly realised it is impossible that it will work out. At least I had three dates, I guess because of my anti corona opinion. I heard other guys try for a whole year and hardly get any dates.
      Needless to say the three dates were not working out...
      Man and women want each other but still can't find to each other. Very strange times we live in...

    • @4SChris
      @4SChris 25 дней назад +3

      @@GangdamStyle20 Only because women are all chasing the same guys, that is why they cannot find a man, but they should check their friendzone ! :-D

    • @k.apricot
      @k.apricot 20 дней назад +1

      ​@@GangdamStyle20bro thats a myth, not every woman gets bombarded with men. Some of us are invincible to men, some of us can get a date but dont have any luck with men etc

    • @k.apricot
      @k.apricot 20 дней назад

      ​@@4SChrisyeah this doesnt work when guy friends dont see you as a romatic interest

  • @bunnysb2587
    @bunnysb2587 7 месяцев назад +27

    I love single. I like to save money and im very selfish and I don't want to talk to anyone if i want to make a decision. I want this my way. I enjoy not arguing and being abused physically and mentally and someone trying to control me and being cheated on. I don't miss that and don't want it. I enjoy being able to live a free life do want i want and don't want to have the responsibility of dealing with a relationship.

  • @joshuatimms1184
    @joshuatimms1184 3 месяца назад +25

    “Anybody that did come into my life in that regard would be competing with my peace.” That’s exactly it. I’m finally at a point where I enjoy being alone that any disturbance to my comfortable way of living just doesn’t seem worth it to me anymore.

  • @MichaelClark-zc7ht
    @MichaelClark-zc7ht Год назад +53

    Dating is seriously. nightmare these days. The rejection, the games, the HAVING to reject people because theyre not mature, not smart, not self-reflective. You hit the nail on the head there. Having to reject someone is seriously agonizing. The last person I was with was SO FIXATED on when I was going to say "I love you", that he eventually left (after 8 weeks!) because I hadn't;t said it yet. Such a mess. You hit in on the head with the ego thing .
    All this being said, I do believe we are ultimately meant to live in relationship. We are meant to live in symbiosis with another soul that is special to us, on a mammalian level. It's just so difficult because there are so many damaged people wandering around who are not ready for that.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад +7

      I'm sorry to hear that happened to you. 8 weeks seems like a very short time to expect someone to say I love you. So they probably had some of their own issues to work on first.

    • @Carlbooze
      @Carlbooze Месяц назад +1

      A masterpiece of insight! Thx.

    • @BlackRose369.
      @BlackRose369. Месяц назад +3

      "Damaged people around"
      There just too many of us, and it makes everyone sick.
      It shows on every front

    • @JeDindk
      @JeDindk 9 дней назад +1

      I just love your comment! My last relationship was almost 20 years ago ... I've had too many bad experiences and I don't want to give it another go. I just want a simple, peaceful and uncomplicated life, which seems to be incompatible with any kind of relationship.
      However, I don't think relationship are inherently bad. Let's not forget that there are lots of people in happy relationships out there - and some of them last to the very end. At least to the very end of one of them. I'm more than willing to admit that I envie those people who has been fortunate enough to find true love, because I believe that is the best life anyone can have.

  • @electricEntity81
    @electricEntity81 9 месяцев назад +9

    Wow. This really resonated with me. You said everything I feel ..and a whole lot more. 😊 thank you

  • @sirgigglez
    @sirgigglez 5 месяцев назад +68

    im 36 and been single since birth. i love it. 😊

    • @Mr.hollywood123
      @Mr.hollywood123 2 месяца назад +7

      Im 32 me too

    • @raisa_cherry35
      @raisa_cherry35 2 месяца назад +8

      I'm 35 and single,no regrets ❤

    • @Anonymous-f5v
      @Anonymous-f5v 2 месяца назад +2

      I am 29, Single, direction less, I don't know why I'm living

    • @Anonymous-f5v
      @Anonymous-f5v 2 месяца назад +2

      How you guys find happiness at age 32, 35 etc. ?

    • @vadim6385
      @vadim6385 2 месяца назад

      @@Anonymous-f5v you stop chasing happiness and focus on things you actually like doing

  • @aiden_zae
    @aiden_zae Год назад +10

    Hi Evan. I wanna say thank you for making this video. It opened up new perspective for me. I got broken up with by my 9 years relationship which got me really heartbroken. So the things you said make sense. Its easy to find a relationship but its really hard to find someone who really love us for us, not the idea of us. It was my first real relationship and love. Im not saying i wanna be single forever but yes its true, being in relationship is exhausting and in the end, we dont get any return cuz people can leave anytime they decide to leave, it sucks. Better just love ourself to the point we dont care if other people love us or not. I like this mindset, so thank you.

  • @jans724
    @jans724 Месяц назад +7

    Single life as a guy is such freedom and it is much easier to both stay fit and build wealth (save-invest) being single. I discovered this late (I'm 55) but once you make the decision it's a new world.

  • @StoriesFromTheLabyrinth
    @StoriesFromTheLabyrinth Год назад +11

    This video is a BIG mood. I know I haven’t been around in a while, been very focused on my journey but everything you said resonates so well with me ~ when you start healing, you drop off what you once desired so much of and you start to live more simple. You mentioned drinking tea and watching a movie is peace to you. Mine is similar, I love drinking tea and either sitting outside, tea with reading or tea with some ASMR nature sounds and just being in the moment.
    Thank you for this video, Evan! Killing it as usual and love your genuine reassuring energy 🤍

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад +1

      i'm so glad you have been taking care of yourself. its always good to see you brother.

    • @StoriesFromTheLabyrinth
      @StoriesFromTheLabyrinth Год назад

      @@myselfasevan I’ll always be here 🤍 I appreciate you a lot ~ I’m always happy to see how far you are going. Proud of you!

  • @glynnwright1699
    @glynnwright1699 Год назад +35

    I have been married for over forty years and still miss my wife terribly after a few days apart. We support each other in every possible way, life is just a lot less fun without her around. It isn't always a smooth ride, we have disagreements, we both have annoying habits, but that is vastly outweighed by the shared experience.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад +10

      that sounds like a beautiful relationship, I wouldn't mind having that someday.

    • @aiden_zae
      @aiden_zae Год назад +3

      then you are one lucky guy both of u are

    • @twistedtitan5485
      @twistedtitan5485 3 месяца назад

      God bless you guys by giving you ,your full portion of days

    • @vinconssier4224
      @vinconssier4224 15 дней назад

      some people are built for it, others not

    • @shreddez
      @shreddez 15 дней назад

      Good for you. Situations like yours are the exception, not the norm.

  • @SuperOGArchives
    @SuperOGArchives 27 дней назад +5

    I've been in two relationships. 7 years and 3 years. I realized later. I like being alone. It takes time to understand that about yourself. I'm not gonna say they were bad partners at all. I decided my mental health comes first and I left. It's always under looked for some reason. Ever since then, I been happy alone because I do get my inner peace back. Being with someone does require dedication, sacrifice and commitment. It's too much to carry and I don't want that anymore. I don't care what others want because we do live in a judgmental society. Do whats best for you at the end of the day. It's your life and you're responsibility.

  • @Gonosen
    @Gonosen 2 месяца назад +9

    I've been single 7 years...no intention of being in a relationship or dating again...its not worth the hassle .

  • @iamwabisabi3711
    @iamwabisabi3711 Год назад +60

    So good 👍 i am a 33 year old woman and i absolutely adore being single. It suits who i am x

    • @jurassicthunder
      @jurassicthunder Месяц назад +5

      as if you have a choice other than a simp.

    • @vv-cv6ud
      @vv-cv6ud Месяц назад +3

      She probably has so many in friendszone just in case she changed her with the another swipe

    • @EricDraven-qd9pu
      @EricDraven-qd9pu Месяц назад +1

      A happy single woman 😂😂😂, no sweetie women are only happy when destroying men and cheating

    • @Ben-jq5oo
      @Ben-jq5oo 27 дней назад

      @@jurassicthundertoxic manosphere comment

    • @aleksejjovanovic986
      @aleksejjovanovic986 26 дней назад

      It will hit you hard in 15 years from now, mark my words. Women are not meant to be alone whole life, its different for men.

  • @rodneyrosse198
    @rodneyrosse198 Месяц назад +5

    Amen Evan! I'm 55, single, never been married, no kids. I enjoy my peace and quiet! Ya'll can have these marriages! From what I can see, there is too much drama in marriages.

  • @Seven8001
    @Seven8001 Месяц назад +6

    All very good advice, even for older men like me. I just turned 76 in August. My wife passed about five years ago, and I have been alone since then. The key for me is just having a positive outlook on life try to have a good day most days. Good luck with your channel.

  • @prescottspivey
    @prescottspivey Год назад +9

    I’m in the exact same mindset/boat as you at 23, all urges and addictions are gone, just total freedom

  • @ukesam514
    @ukesam514 3 месяца назад +14

    For the first time in my life today, I thought.. "if I'm single for the rest of my life... So be it-- I got my back". I'm using ONE dating app, and if someone doesn't come along who is also self-aware, loves themselves and on the same page as me.... I'll just continue to be happily single, thank you. Thank you for this video!

    • @jurassicthunder
      @jurassicthunder Месяц назад

      and 6 feet tall.

    • @ukesam514
      @ukesam514 Месяц назад

      @@jurassicthunder i've dated my height before, which is 5'4. She's out there! Good luck.

    • @aleksejjovanovic986
      @aleksejjovanovic986 26 дней назад

      Dating apps are BS, only lowlives are there. You need to go out and talk to men irl, be humble and you must make first move. Not many men will go for it first, not after how women screamed to be left alone, men pick up on that.
      Unfortunately, most men avoid women because of the way women are these days.

    • @ReginaPhalangee
      @ReginaPhalangee 3 дня назад

      @@jurassicthunder You're a bitter loser that has to comment on every women's post. We don't need you!! AND we don't WANT YOU.

  • @zaristophanes
    @zaristophanes Год назад +8

    I am 18, and this hits home for me, the confidence and dopamine I get from talking to new people makes me happier than being in a long term relationship right now. I think the best thing is to focus on me and forget about finding a girl, unlike everyone else at my university

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад

      Keep at it brother

    • @gabrielgabriel5177
      @gabrielgabriel5177 28 дней назад

      God ment people to marry not to date. Or to stay single. But dating is plan of satan its fornication. And you are only 18 years old. Its basicly syill child. You are not yet even able for marriage becouse man neess to be older that his wife and he need to take lot of responsibility of their family. So of course you should still stay single.

  • @mimoojoyce
    @mimoojoyce 5 месяцев назад +11

    I can relate to this, i am 31 and i can't figure my self in a romantic relationship. I thought i was not okay but am happy to see people who i can relate with

  • @teeaymusik9811
    @teeaymusik9811 Год назад +15

    34 years old, 14 years single. I had only toxic affairs in this time which were very bad and traumatizing.. you cant call them relationships and it only lasted 2 and 4 months. But i can't help it the demand to find a nice young girl (like 20-25) is still there. And the fear of getting older and not finding her.. It's very hard to find such a girl but im luckily not living in america i live in germany and the hope here is not completely lost. That's atleast my hope.

    • @kittykat.88
      @kittykat.88 Год назад +2

      Try dating your own age perhaps?

    • @teeaymusik9811
      @teeaymusik9811 Год назад +4

      @@kittykat.88 Women want older men, men want younger women. If you dont know simple rules why u commenting? My sister is 23 and her bf 42.. This case is a bit extreme indeed but its totally okay to date a woman around that age range since they have less garbage. The last woman i dated was 44 and it was catastrophic.

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад +3

      keep your heart and mind open brother, I'm sure she is out there.

    • @maddatheist7254
      @maddatheist7254 Год назад +2

      I'm 36 and I also live in Germany (Not German )I think that I can relate to your case but the only difference is that I'm totally fine being alone and not finding the girl that I want doesn't really effect my inner happiness with myself you can say I'm afraid of losing myself to a relationship. I had many dates in the last 3 years and some of them turned quickly into relationships but none of them contributed anything to my self- development but the other way around they took all my energy that I saved, all my independence that I built and left me on the ground with nothing. I'm now focussing on my future and gathering more strength and selfcontrol. The attempt of finding the "Nice girl which is somewhere outside" was always the thing that put me down enslaved my energy. This kind of girls are living only inside our heads.

    • @teeaymusik9811
      @teeaymusik9811 Год назад

      @@maddatheist7254 Yeah its way too hard to find a good one these days but they exist! I know it firsthand because my little sister (she is 24) is one of the good ones.. She directly did it right and searched for the right man and settled down without wasting her 20's. Second child is on the way.. Perhaps this can give you back a bit of hope if u want to date at 40 or something. But I must focus on myself too and in my case i really should forget it completely until i built up myself.

  • @OvertIntelligence
    @OvertIntelligence Год назад +8

    I think when we live on our purpose the right people will be there.

  • @queenseducationalresources
    @queenseducationalresources 10 месяцев назад +4

    I don’t comment on videos but felt compelled for this. You and I think EXACTLY alike. Very well said! I’ve been single for years and couldn’t be happier. Wow. Thanks for this video. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  • @arielcandoleta5347
    @arielcandoleta5347 Год назад +10

    The thing is you need to work on yourself and be whole yourself first before seeking out a partner because relationship is about two whole people getting along with each other. There is no such thing as the other half it doesn't exist.

  • @LakeRonin
    @LakeRonin 18 дней назад +2

    Being single as a mid 30s man is awesome. Been married - miserable, had a son - being a Dad is AMAZING, had long term relationships - miserable...focusing on being you, letting go of any complexity, be authentic, practice communication...WINNING. Every day is filled with personal passion and growth. And you can watch 10 seasons of SG-1 and noone makes you feel guilty for how epic the journey was! Just be yourself.
    "Someone else is going to be competing with my own peace" 100%

  • @GrandMalCsur-x1t
    @GrandMalCsur-x1t 24 дня назад +2

    The longer I have been single, the happier I get. So peaceful. Stable. Consistent. I am free. I have more time for kids. Thanks for this. I agree. Its nice to hear someone else say it.

  • @zelice3270
    @zelice3270 4 месяца назад +7

    Being authentic is the key! Look, I just live my life and love being a single lady at the age of 43. a job that I love helps me and lots of walks in nature and yoga with meditation. No extreme things needed to be happy despite the media crazy things surrounding me I love simple things like a good conversation with a a cup of tea and a genuine laugh. Oh and tons of sun and traveling 😅but this is me and you do you - whatever makes you smile, do more of that! Simple, right ?

  • @Orochihiko
    @Orochihiko 11 месяцев назад +4

    I’m 30, and literally same bro. Thanks for this!

  • @TonyeJunior-zq3ll
    @TonyeJunior-zq3ll Месяц назад +2

    I'm very impressed of what the RUclipsr is saying, saying words I understand (I don't what it feels like to date or have a girlfriend) but the amount of pressure,money or even time. I understand that. It's best to be with people who value you (or care for who you are) not about the wealth (or the fame)😊

  • @jcronin3155
    @jcronin3155 Год назад +9

    I do believe if we meet the right woman and the relationship is coming from a place of freedom then it is a wonderful addition to our life.
    The one thing I would add to this is if it's something you do hope for then leaving it too late - I'm 43 - can leave you with the problem that every woman you meet is either married, has kids or is divorced with kids......😂.

  • @4862cjc
    @4862cjc Месяц назад +5

    54 yo man here. Great video! When I was younger, every once in a while some adult would say to me, “You need a girlfriend!” Now, I do not have a problem with women, but my problem is with that statement. Why do I need a gf? What problem would that solve? Again, the problem is not women, but there was this attitude that being single was somehow a problem by itself or a condition to be avoided.

  • @JohnDoe-pg9oq
    @JohnDoe-pg9oq 20 дней назад +1

    I never seriously dated anyone until I was 29. Focused on personal goals and growth. Learned who I am and what I like. Also addressed my many shortcomings like alcoholism (7 years sober now). In my 20’s I had a lot of growing up to do.
    6 years later I’m happily married to my soulmate with a newborn sleeping on my chest as I type this. I’m glad I spent so much of my life alone. I enjoyed being single and therefore I would only accept a relationship that was meaningful and fulfilling rather than doing it out of desperation.

  • @ervinchavez4064
    @ervinchavez4064 2 месяца назад +4

    Thank you so much for your video. Im divorcing my soon to be ex wife and its 1 of the hardest challenges ever. Watching your video has given insight about who i was/am and who i dont want to be anymore. I want to be happy and find peace for myself. I shouldn't rely and put that on another person.

  • @lyndawest923
    @lyndawest923 Месяц назад +2

    When you let go and just live life in joy and peace. All good things will come to you.

  • @DMacy7
    @DMacy7 Месяц назад +2

    35, single, no children. I am much more happier single than in a relationship. I find it much more satisfying focusing on my career and spending time with my parents as they get older.

  • @Roger-jt5ev
    @Roger-jt5ev Месяц назад +2

    Yes sir,, my happiness does not depends on anybody. Ive been 12 years single and I dont regret any bit of It.

  • @jcronin3155
    @jcronin3155 Год назад +17

    That book Letting Go by David Hawkings is so important with regards finding peace within ourselves.
    It's the bible of our time. This book has helped me let go of this constant craving for a romantic relationship that I've had for years.

  • @slate49
    @slate49 19 часов назад

    I’m so content being single. Love it! I’ve had relationships that wore me out with disagreements and arguments. Those years wore me out. I love the peace and happiness I have in my space now. The only problem I seem to have is when I start hanging out with someone or people, it never fails that someone wants more than I want to give. Someone wants a relationship once they get to know me. That’s frustrating. Why can’t people just be friends without wanting more. I’ll be 50 and I am 100% ok being single.
    Now things could change on down the line but I ain’t looking and I’m not wanting a relationship. I would be satisfied being single the rest of my life I feel. Just having friends who share my same interests is good enough for me. Besides, I like my bed to myself. I never could sleep comfortably with someone 🤣 the activities in bed verses sleeping is too different things. I don’t want to be touched before I have my coffee in the mornings. The worse thing ever is someone waking me up. The worst thing ever is being with someone and feeling alone, too. The worst!

  • @ttocselbag5054
    @ttocselbag5054 Месяц назад +3

    You speak wisdom and maturity young man. Good on you!! 👊💪

  • @60wds
    @60wds Год назад +6

    Evan you are highly evolved and directly on target.

  • @julielevesque2668
    @julielevesque2668 Год назад +2

    You're spot on and I feel the exact same way.

  • @feelalivepiano
    @feelalivepiano Год назад +9

    I'm 31
    Since the last 3 years I have been single
    Learning Mixed Martial Arts with BJJ
    Have a RUclips Channel where I play the pieces of piano
    Doing good as a lawyer professionally
    Taking care of my parents
    Loving every bit of every activity that I'm doing but no one really gets it.
    Improving yourself is pure gold

    • @myselfasevan
      @myselfasevan  Год назад

      I love everything that you're focusing on. Sometimes when you're time is filled with things that you bring you joy and peace, a relationship is not necessary.

    • @feelalivepiano
      @feelalivepiano Год назад +1

      @@myselfasevan and the feeling gets stronger every passing day too. Thank you for creating such honest content. Do not change over time

  • @troymack8205
    @troymack8205 Месяц назад +1

    By turning 35 this past July, I can confirm everything this man said to be true....how I know I lived through 90-95 percent of what this video is about and how I feel now more so going through a break up putting my peace 1st and foremost.

  • @Tauraco00
    @Tauraco00 20 дней назад +1

    Hi I've been alone and single, achieved great financial success, but dating, kissed alot of frogs....waited till I turned 40, when you meet the right person, life partner🎉r🎉🎉❤❤❤, so it's not easy, but love and devotion is key!, we married 10 years, still going strong❤

  • @rijd2304
    @rijd2304 Год назад +4

    This was awesome. I got into mindfulness meditation and enjoy now my "self" like never before. The book 30 Days to Reduce Anxiety by Harper Daniels and the book Awareness by Anthony de Mello were helpful to me at the start but now I enjoy just being alone AND being with people.

  • @danphillips7572
    @danphillips7572 Год назад +1

    So well said Evan, you are spot on and I am in a healthy season of life and completely agree and resonate with what you said in this video.

  • @aisha.j200
    @aisha.j200 3 месяца назад +2

    Ok I was in a relationship for 13 years relationship a lot of ups n downs but I agree 110% with him relationships are a job being a parent is a job I told myself after my 2nd child I wouldn’t have anymore not becuz of the work but to experience this world we live in is crucial u have to put other ppl responsible to take care of ur kids weather it’s school or nanny u have to constantly remember one day someone is gonna feel pain n lose wen a parent dies that child will be left alone or any other thought to be in a relationship were u gotta get a approval from others or if not tryna survive ur mental on letting life flow wit or without this person it’s just a lot n ppl kill over love n heart breaks it’s just a lot a peace of mind is very refreshing idk a lot of ppl cnt handle that

  • @steven1671
    @steven1671 Месяц назад +1

    The happiest, most joy filled moments of my life were when I was dating and being with my ex. She was and still is, the woman of my dreams. But she wasn’t into me, so we didn’t work out.
    At the very least though, she showed me how good things could be, how much more enriching life can be when you’re in a passionate, romantic relationship. And I know things could have been even better than what little experiences she gave me. I’ll always be dreaming of her, of the love she made me feel and how I felt so loved just for being myself. I’ve never experienced anything like that before. I’ll never forget her. I’ll always be thinking of her, even after I pass into the afterlife.
    I don’t want to be single and alone. Not after meeting that woman. I know I’m missing out, so much. Oh well. My dreams will probably never come true in my lifetime. But at least I have the freedom to dream. Now that’s something no one can take away from me.

  • @petespirals
    @petespirals 12 дней назад

    I hear you bro. My partner was so toxic to me I left ( hard to leave the kids ) and spent 4 months living in my van in the countryside and swimming in the sea. So beautiful, I started to feel strength and lovely positive energy returning into my being.

  • @broinsocali
    @broinsocali Месяц назад +4

    Im not putting someone else before me ever again.

  • @RubenWalsh-iv5ik
    @RubenWalsh-iv5ik Месяц назад +3

    I can honestly say that Im a handsome guy. Ive made the effort to be a man of worth not just sitting on my bum being good looking. Im genuinely happy being single. Does that mean that I date and hook up? No. Im not starved or thirsty for a females touch. I value friends, family, work, hobbies and travelling more than being with someone who wants me but doesnt want to change for the better. Most women hate being alone, that why they look for a man in their life, and to pay their bills. Im getting ever more closer to God, that alone is my complete happiness and peace.

  • @kennelson3848
    @kennelson3848 Месяц назад +2

    To 'Be' with your real self is true everlasting 'Love'..😊❤

  • @ryanguy6789
    @ryanguy6789 5 дней назад +1

    Excellent video. I agree. Embrace it. Being in a relationship has some pros and many cons, and especially if you are introverted, you may very well find yourself less stressed and more happy by yourself. All your time is yours, no complaining from someone else to deal with, if anything I think men are much better suited to be alone than women. Let the women be the ones searching for chad, for the perfect guy, it's so much wasted energy and effort trying to convince someone else of your worth. I think more and more men are dropping out from pursuit of conventional life that society wants from everyone - and it's a great thing. Life is not a one size fits all thing. Online dating is obviously VERY rigged against men, so why play a rigged game? I say, just enjoy the fruits of your own life that you create, you don't need to spend any of your time or resources convincing someone else that you are worth it. Do it all for yourself. I would not have an issue if I found an attractive and kind woman to hang out with but it never happens and I am not going to try and spend my limited time trying to get that when it doesn't happen naturally. I'll be fine without it. There are so many other fun ways to spend your free time.

  • @deryayazici9387
    @deryayazici9387 3 дня назад

    love should give you freedom .. If not I will keep being single loving myself and enjoy the life ❤❤❤

  • @Neoncrusader-oo1ij
    @Neoncrusader-oo1ij 3 месяца назад +2

    "When was the last time you entered a relationship with the full mindfulness you have now, and found a partner with a level of emotional intelligence that matches your mindfulness? I wish I had seen this video when I was in my 20s. I agree that most people haven't worked enough on their unconscious to understand the influence of the psyche and trauma on their lives. However, I believe that when you embrace love without attachment and with mindfulness as best as you can, true unconditional love in a relationship is the best way to enjoy life. I think this is what you truly want deep down in your heart, but you have accepted that you will live a good life even if it never comes

  • @viviannaContreras
    @viviannaContreras 3 месяца назад

    It’s so true about society putting that narrative on getting married and how it makes some of us seem incomplete if not reached.. you hit it on the nail! I’m so glad I feel more at peace on my own and working on myself in the meantime until I naturally meet someone 💯

  • @alezandradavila2581
    @alezandradavila2581 11 месяцев назад +4

    Good for you me too burnt out . I did that in my 20s then divorced

  • @lordgrim355
    @lordgrim355 Месяц назад +1

    I’m 29 and I agree. I’m at the point where getting my life together and making money is all I care about

  • @blueboy77
    @blueboy77 Месяц назад

    👌👌👏 bang on bro been there got several T shirts. Now single and loving it. I will protect my peace at all costs. Never lonely, never bored and back to being 100% me. No drama I could go on and on but you’ve covered every base. Good job 👍

  • @davecrawford1813
    @davecrawford1813 День назад

    Great video brother and I agree 100% on all points made, thank you

  • @zelice3270
    @zelice3270 4 месяца назад +1

    you helped me realize this: a woman happy with just being single seems way more attractive. Obviously this is same for men and you are the proof

  • @Justdugo
    @Justdugo 14 дней назад

    Same. I noticed I’m at my best/peace when I’m alone. I prefer my strong friendships. I just like my intimate personal space alone.

  • @DanielCalderone94
    @DanielCalderone94 Год назад +3

    This moved me. Thank you sir 👊🏼🔥

  • @robbie3839
    @robbie3839 29 дней назад +1

    I am 61yrs young and single I am happy with life the way it is sending ❤from Australia 🇦🇺

  • @moto-nut8052
    @moto-nut8052 Год назад +7

    I'm 57m, bachelor for life. Feel the same way. Meh on a LTR

  • @spirg
    @spirg 4 дня назад

    I’m 58 and have never been in one ever , It’s great !!! I see a lot of unhappy married guys , they never smile , EVER, kids and everything.
    Yep , I’ll stay by myself and keep doing my photography ❤

  • @Mike-t5r9q
    @Mike-t5r9q 25 дней назад +1

    Amen brother I'm literally in the same shoes as you im 33 and have no interest in being in a relationship or get married & have kids i just enjoy my space way to much and im having a blast living a stress free life. Times have changed from our parents time not everyone wants to get married or have kids

    • @dansari0007
      @dansari0007 25 дней назад

      same here, i have been on many dates in the past year and the latest girl I went on 3 dates with hurt me badly, as I really liked her but said she didn't want to continue anymore as I wasn't masculine enough. Hurt so much it took me nearly 6 weeks to move on and stop thinking about her. Had to unfollow her on social media cos I kept stalking her posts.
      Id rather be alone now and become an avoidant as I can't afford to be hurt anymore mentally...

  • @GotThemCheeseBurgerz
    @GotThemCheeseBurgerz Месяц назад

    Great video. I’m 30 and got out of a 1.5 yr relationship back in May. The peace and freedom is so nice. I agree with everything you’re saying. I think I would’ve been miserable living with that woman and getting married. Loving the single life. I haven’t even started dating again. Just doing whatever I want whenever I feel like it feels so nice. I think I’m good on relationships. So much happier.

  • @clementguichet5726
    @clementguichet5726 2 месяца назад

    This really resonated with me. Especially when you pointed that relationships can bring out trauma or make you take notice of certain recurring patterns, it certainly did with my relationships and reflecting upon it spurred massive self-growth. In that regard, relationships are super useful but I've never felt as much freedom as when I am single, it's truly liberating to realize you don't necessarily have to chase a new relationship after another contrary to what everyone does. This leaves me wondering how much of me getting into committed relationships in the past has been motivated by that desire alone, to do like everyone else although I'm good by myself. Now it makes loads of sense why I always ended up with a mismatch between me and partners not being good in their own skin, I just wasn't true to myself

  • @barberjeff67
    @barberjeff67 28 дней назад

    I'm with you. I no longer have time to waste trying to find a life partner. I have a career I enjoy, I'm busy playing music and love to hang with my son when he has time. I'm tired of the drama. And my freedom is more important to me.

  • @KH-nt7ej
    @KH-nt7ej 2 месяца назад +1

    I have been single for almost 16 years after divorce. I felt like this for years. I want to meet a great guy now. Don't want to do dating apps. They seem like a waste of time or stupid to me. I am putting my faith in organically finding the right guy for me. If it takes time, so be it. I still enjoy my own company in the interim.

  • @Boosh43
    @Boosh43 5 месяцев назад +2

    Yes this something I don't want to make time for at this moment...

  • @thomas232
    @thomas232 Месяц назад

    “Feeling alone in a crowded room.” That’s how jumping into a relationship when you still have unresolved junk feels. I’m 31 too! Took a whole year to be alone and work on myself/hobbies and can proudly say I’m ready to explore dating again and am able to be authentic! Woof it was a lot though…

  • @thedonald9411
    @thedonald9411 4 месяца назад +3

    Been there seen it , and love being single and alone , im happy😊

  • @ezracox1833
    @ezracox1833 9 месяцев назад +3

    I’m 25 I don’t really want to be in a relationship , I haven’t traveled the world
    Yet I want to give my dream my dream a try I’m just not ready

  • @dansari0007
    @dansari0007 25 дней назад +2

    i have been on many dates in the past year and the latest girl I went on 3 dates with hurt me badly, as I really liked her but said she didn't want to continue anymore as I wasn't masculine enough. Hurt so much it took me nearly 6 weeks to move on and stop thinking about her. Had to unfollow her on social media cos I kept stalking her posts.
    Id rather be alone now and become an avoidant as I can't afford to be hurt anymore mentally...

  • @MickeysGrenade
    @MickeysGrenade 4 месяца назад +4

    I needed to hear this. Awsome.

  • @mamba137
    @mamba137 3 месяца назад +2

    Thank u for making this video I’m 36 single no kids live alone and I don’t wanna date I don’t see no point in getting married I feel it’s just not worth it I really can care less about having kids leaving a legacy in this crazy world na I’m good I love my peace and freedom plus having a a child is like having a women they expensive I can’t afford to have them

  • @stone5015
    @stone5015 14 дней назад

    Your one smart man. When the day comes, you'll know.

  • @erikt1713
    @erikt1713 29 дней назад

    I'm not made for being alone. I get restless and mix a lot with people, trying out new interests and hobbies. Sooner or later I find a new woman and tend to stick with her. Right now it's going great and we have a new baby 👶🏻

  • @Disavowed_Rogue
    @Disavowed_Rogue Год назад +4

    I don't know who you are, but you get it.

  • @BrianWaller-qe7gr
    @BrianWaller-qe7gr 12 дней назад

    I’m the same way but it’s because of the endless rejection, ghosting, endless talking stages, then when you think you found something boom she ghosts you. F that I’m so done with the bs.

  • @jorbu1423
    @jorbu1423 10 дней назад

    Dont underestimate the power of saying yes to doing what you want to do when you want to do it without someone stopping you.

  • @kadafi4lyf
    @kadafi4lyf 28 дней назад

    This video hits hard. Im 28m in a newish relationship for about 1 year now. I miss my peace. I miss being able to spend a whole day playing video games. Eating what i want. Spending and saving what i want. She's a nice girl, no complaints, but its not the way i want to live.

  • @igotbit9454
    @igotbit9454 Месяц назад

    The thumbnail is the exact reason why I’m happier single

  • @jamesleth806
    @jamesleth806 3 месяца назад +2

    Spot on . Detachment in life is a skill but leads to peace of mind.

  • @andrewjackson6249
    @andrewjackson6249 27 дней назад

    Good call, having had so many girlfriends I lost count years ago I’m now the same at 57 😄focusing on my business and personal projects, it’s a good mantra