Dr. Olds, you are brilliant! My mind is in love with your mind. Thank you for your courage and interest in understanding how our mind and spirit works.
I agree with the effusive comments here. Your explanations are brilliant. And I have been in a DBT group for 14 months that I just had to leave. And so much was great. But the focus on regulation and externally oriented tools was really getting frustrating. And connection between people was not fostered enough. And forming relationships was discouraged. The connection piece was sorely left out. And have have helped me realize that moving on was a good thing. I want to heal deeply not just regulate. And don't use the tools too keep avoiding the pain of reconnecting either!....and sometimes the messiness. We need to work through the messiness. Thank you sooo very much!
I found this conversation so helpful and clarifying and hopeful and beautiful. I missed it when it was live (because I was IN a therapy session 😊) and I am very, very grateful that it was still up on youtube afterwards so I could listen to it later in the day.
Connection with emotions (and their regulation) are pillars of EFT but the way you contrast them is very powerful. I admit I move towards regulation pretty quickly and should allow more space for reflection. I took notes. Thank you for this video! You have a talent for highlighting aspects of our 'science' in interesting ways that make me think. 🙂
Thank you for this video. There's some very informative and thought provoking stuff here. I especially enjoyed your response to the question at 21:26. I'll bet you're a wonderful mom. Blessings to you and yours.😀💞🙏
Hi Tori, thanks a lot for your videos. They are helping me define my need for therapy. I can't find this vid, and it seams other livestreams, on your channel. RUclips suggested them to me. Is it just me or maybe something you can set on your part? Thanks again and keep on spreading the healing :)
This video brings into focus what has been implicit in your entire series -- that the heart of it all is our crucial need for self-connection. You never let any one theory stand in the way of keeping that need and possibility alive for us. This is a rare and precious gift and I am so grateful to you for sharing it in such a deep, abiding way.
What days do you go live and at what time? This was a great video. I appreciate the explanation between regulating and relating to our pain. As well as pulling away from the pain a bit to see it clearer and learn.
It’s all about helping the exile really deeply understand that when it floods, it is simple alone again. Which is not what it wants. Usually our exiles are so used to being pushed into the closet, they finally break free and then don’t want to be told to step back, even an inch. But if they can truly understand that we want them to not flood us NOT because we want to shut them back up, but just the opposite..becuase we want to hear them and connect to them…then they learn how to show up without taking the whole brain over. And when our protectors hear and see us doing that prep work with our exiles, they feel safer too..,
Dr. Olds, you are brilliant! My mind is in love with your mind. Thank you for your courage and interest in understanding how our mind and spirit works.
I agree with the effusive comments here. Your explanations are brilliant. And I have been in a DBT group for 14 months that I just had to leave. And so much was great. But the focus on regulation and externally oriented tools was really getting frustrating. And connection between people was not fostered enough. And forming relationships was discouraged. The connection piece was sorely left out. And have have helped me realize that moving on was a good thing. I want to heal deeply not just regulate. And don't use the tools too keep avoiding the pain of reconnecting either!....and sometimes the messiness. We need to work through the messiness. Thank you sooo very much!
You're so welcome! :)
This video answered so many questions I have been wrestling with. Thank you so much. You have such a beautiful soul.
I’m really glad to hear that Jo, thank you :)
I found this conversation so helpful and clarifying and hopeful and beautiful. I missed it when it was live (because I was IN a therapy session 😊) and I am very, very grateful that it was still up on youtube afterwards so I could listen to it later in the day.
"...so I can really hear you clearly.. because your message is so important" That's beautiful.
Thanks Matt! ;)
I keep coming back to these videos time and time again for all the different moments in my life where I need some guidance.
Connection with emotions (and their regulation) are pillars of EFT but the way you contrast them is very powerful. I admit I move towards regulation pretty quickly and should allow more space for reflection. I took notes. Thank you for this video! You have a talent for highlighting aspects of our 'science' in interesting ways that make me think. 🙂
So glad to hear that! Thanks!! :)
Thank you for this! Very helpful ❤
Glad it was helpful!
Thank you for this video. There's some very informative and thought provoking stuff here. I especially enjoyed your response to the question at 21:26. I'll bet you're a wonderful mom. Blessings to you and yours.😀💞🙏
Hi Tori, thanks a lot for your videos. They are helping me define my need for therapy.
I can't find this vid, and it seams other livestreams, on your channel. RUclips suggested them to me. Is it just me or maybe something you can set on your part? Thanks again and keep on spreading the healing :)
Thank you 😄
Dr. Olds you're the best 🙏
Awe…thank you!!! :)
Massive thanks again, Dr Tori😁🙏
This video brings into focus what has been implicit in your entire series -- that the heart of it all is our crucial need for self-connection. You never let any one theory stand in the way of keeping that need and possibility alive for us. This is a rare and precious gift and I am so grateful to you for sharing it in such a deep, abiding way.
Thanks for these two comments! I really appreciated reading them ;)
The sound on this was garbled
Thanks so much…I want to hear you clearly
Oh no! Maybe try one of the other videos then?
What days do you go live and at what time? This was a great video. I appreciate the explanation between regulating and relating to our pain. As well as pulling away from the pain a bit to see it clearer and learn.
I haven’t set a regular schedule yet, but it is certainly something I would like to do eventually!! Thanks for your interest!! :)
If a protector is afraid that an exile will overwhelm because it has in the past, how can you build trust that it wont happen again?
It’s all about helping the exile really deeply understand that when it floods, it is simple alone again. Which is not what it wants. Usually our exiles are so used to being pushed into the closet, they finally break free and then don’t want to be told to step back, even an inch. But if they can truly understand that we want them to not flood us NOT because we want to shut them back up, but just the opposite..becuase we want to hear them and connect to them…then they learn how to show up without taking the whole brain over. And when our protectors hear and see us doing that prep work with our exiles, they feel safer too..,