How to make hard choices | Ruth Chang
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 17 июн 2014
- Here's a talk that could literally change your life. Which career should I pursue? Should I break up - or get married?! Where should I live? Big decisions like these can be agonizingly difficult. But that's because we think about them the wrong way, says philosopher Ruth Chang. She offers a powerful new framework for shaping who we truly are.
TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more.
Find closed captions and translated subtitles in many languages at www.ted.com/translate
Follow TED news on Twitter: / tednews
Like TED on Facebook: / ted
Subscribe to our channel: / tedtalksdirector 
Хобби
I didn't really fully grasp this until watching the second time around. The first time I didn't find it very helpful. In reality it's quite profound. Let go of the pro-con list and the endless comparison and analysis of every feature. Let go of fear and of taking the safer, easier route. Decide who you want to be and what you want to live for, and then choose whatever will get you closer to that. And celebrate hard choices as opportunities to define yourself and your life.
An overload of examples kills it in the beginning 7 minutes.
I rewatched this as well, like 5 or 7 years later. You summed it up great.
Just read the book by Chip Heath and Dan Heath-
These Americans 'came up with'/talk about most of the ideas in Ruth Chang's talk-
It saves the mental agony of having to visualize and understand the subtexts of each word in her talk.
How they apply to different contexts, scenarios, situations etc.
I've listened to it 4 times already, within 2 weeks, lol.
Excellent summary, thank you! I was stuck on her saying don't be a slave to reasons but instead create your own reasons. I have a huge decision that's been very difficult for me. I'm afraid I could justify either choice with my made up justifications (reasons). However, that would be only based on a confirmation basis of what my feeling have already secretly decided they want. I hope they makes sense. I didn't like the make-up-your reasons as a point. But the way you explained it had me blown away. This paradigm shift in thinking is actually extremely helpful!
"Hard choices are hard because there are no best options."
I love this line. Thank you.
It' s so true. I just went through this and it was a whole process. I even made a video about it because it was such a process. But I did it! #winning! 😂
But it's something even a dog knows.
See this is why I couldn't really feel this. I dont believe this is true. One decision seems to always be better than the other over all... however nuanced
If it feels off maybe don't do it
Kinda self-evident?
"When you come upon a difficult life choice think about who you will become when you choose one or the other. Use that to inform your choice rather than the qualities of the choices themselves."
i want everything
no
Thanks, now I know which cereal to buy
Yes but I’m scared to pull 4 teeth out... but if I don’t my teeth will look pop out and weide
I needed to hear 👂 you say that thank you💙
This talk can be truely life changing. I now realize.why I find it so hard to choose between two option. Because i dont know how each will turn out. And fear blinds me. By making all choices equally good, I can realize what my heart really wants. And then I can create reasons to support that decision, and working on create the path, making the choice turn out to be right. No more cofusion. Thank you.
ditto
@Eli Lis I lost the heaviness in my heart when I chose what I needed
Except what the heart wants isn't always good, it's blinding even. I would literally choose a toxic partner I love over a safe rational partner
I don't want to be a drifter. I want to take charge of my life and make hard choices. Your video came JUST IN TIME. Thank you. God bless.
Same. So tired of starting over. This fork in the road is going to very much hurt either way. But one way will make life much better in the long run. It'll just hurt in the short term. As opposed to being numb and lethargic in the short term with no odds in favor of growth. Here we go.
How is your life now is it better or worse than u want it to be
I watched this a few years ago and still drifted. But no more.
so, when making hard choices, choose the option that leads you to become the person you wish you were, dont fall back on social pressures or personal fears.
there, i saved you 14 minutes.
sheepwshotguns thank you.
sheepwshotguns you're making it easy for the lazy people lol. that's what she is preaching about on here.
Was rewatching several times to get it, should have scrolled to the comments first
Super helpful thank you
don't listen to xoxXOXO l, you're doing god's work.
some people can't spend 17 minutes for 2 insightful phrases. it's not laziness, it's an imbalance of free time.
8 years later this TED talk is what I needed. Deep down we know, we just need to be true to ourself and confident even if it’s scary af
This is my absolute favorite TED talk and gives me comfort before each hard choice I make. Elegant and compelling. Thank you Dr. Chang.
Please explain it
@@the_boss2194 "Who do you want to be ?"
Lol, same for me, I wished I was not that lazy and read more philosophy to be able to understand better life and more importantly have a real action from philosophy reasoning
I watched this video 9 years ago when I was a college student, and until now it's still eye-opening for me. It reminds me that a hard choice is not a challenge to hinder us, it is a chance to define who we are. We have control over it, rather than let it control our decisions.
I come here and watch this video every time I am faced with a decision that could affect the course of my life. And each time I remind myself to be true to myself and the person that I am (or that I choose to be). I firmly believe that the way we choose to approach what we live really does make a difference. I am eternally grateful to have seen this video by chance all those years ago and to be able to see it again today.
I would like to wish the best of luck to all those who find themselves in the position of having to make a "difficult choice". I hope you always have the strength and courage to choose what is true for yourself.
Not gonna lie, this was better than expected.
I'm in the middle of a tough decision and this made me cry, good tears of course.
I cried too. so powerful, and came in a great moment where I needed to hear this.
hoping it was a good decision you made
After 3 years, did you take the right decision?
I loved the fact she mentioned how we have started evaluating life decisions according to scientific thinking. That's a real eye-opener. Decisions of life are not like length or mass that are measurable as less, more or equal. We may equate it with money but still the choices are still abstract, that's why they're hard. Simply put, hard choices are meant for you to choose what kind of life you want to "create"
For me the problem is when choices impact direct other people and it s not only related to your doing
Then you stand for caring for others .
If you stand for well being of others take a decision that will take you closer to that 😊
Me:
Just make a choice, then make so that it turns out to be a good one.
Agreeee
sometimes however that's not easy or even possible. For example, if you choose a job that's not right for you because of social pressure, you can't force yourself to make it a good choice.
Lmao I like your philosophy
golden comment
That’s called winging it
Another thing about drifters is that they are never truly happy. They don't know what they want and they're annoyed about other people choosing for them.
only someone in this situation understands how it feels...
@@roubenkhosrovian I might say the same as my own personal situation, but that would be presumptive. Wouldn't it?
I find it's true because I don't like to make the strange, difficult choices. Which degree to pursue. What state to live in. What colors to paint my house. What to buy my wife for her next birthday, mothers day, gift day, I messed up day gahhhhhhhhhh. She said just do this because it earns more money. I guess it's what I have to do now. Can't really argue because I have no real passion otherwise except the dumb bliss of avoiding it altogether. Comfort zone be damned. I'm going. Moving on into the fray of the eternal struggle of making those daily, hourly and momently(?) decisions of plowing forward into the unknown result of just doing it. wish me luck yall. I lift my bricks and run forward.
I find uncomfortable truth in that comment.
@@logiconabstractions6596 me too! It seems to be written directly to me ;--;
I couldn't have watched this video at a more apt time in my life. I'm totally lost trying to decide how to move ahead in life. This woman has extreme clarity and understanding of how a situation like I'm in, could be dealt with. Thank you!
Can you please post how are you doing after making a hard choice?
@@sajidmohammed9510 Hi Sajid. 2 years ago, I made a choice of moving abroad to pursue higher studies. It was very tough for the past 2-2.5 years. It's tough even now as I'm looking for jobs. But I'm not going to let myself down because I feel like I've come so far now. Hope is my best friend.
@rajivkrishnatr how are you doing now?
I'm in the same decision - have an admit from a dream school but the new country and my field of study is kind of in shambles right now, absolutely terrible for international students. Haven't been this scared in my life about making a decision.
"but it's not dictated by reasons given to us. Rather, it's supported by reasons created by us."
This talk is full of wisdom. In the end, we are choosing what kind of person we will be when making a hard decision. Thank you, Dr. Chang!
When it comes to lifetime decisions such us who to marry, career to choose and where to live, you have to trust your gut and feelings. You are not going to be happy if you're just rational all the time. Sometimes being right all boils down to what makes you happy.
You gotta be rational AND follow your heart. I'd choose a toxic partner over a safe one, and that's not good
Dr. Chang, this talk is a your gift to the world, and I thank you for so beautifully delivering it to us. I watch this every time I need to make a difficult choice. Thank you so much.
That was a very interesting talk. At first I thought it was going nowhere but as time went on, I understood the argument and, well, it all comes down to this:
You should make your hard decisions based on who you want to become. The outcome of a hard decision is your creating the reasons to justify that choice and embracing them.
I came here after The philosophical Explaination of Mr. NOBODY, a movie that deeply affects my usual disposition and how contradictory choices can be meaningful too sometimes...
Same here
Like Stories of Old 😄
Same here but it was not a hard choice but an easy one.
Same here
OMGGGGG THIS IS THE EXACT REASON WHY I CAME HERE too!!!! THIS WORLD IS AMAZING AFTER ALL ...everything can happen
This talk struck a chord with me. I also "drifted" into becoming into a law student; and when people asked me why I became a lawyer, I told them I was the "least uncertain" about my career path. Seeing things from the perspective of the talk gave me some insight as to how I implicitly chose the person I wanted to become. Thanks Ted!
Every now and then I come back to listen again Ruth's words and each time I discover something new.
In a nutshell: Be true to yourself, instead of conforming to societal expectations and living your own life based on what the society thinks it should be.
You need to watch this again now that you are 7 years older. It's more nuanced than that....
This is awesome. I have struggled with hard choices big and small.... agonizing over the pros and cons of things for days and days. But this has really given me the context to tackle those choices better and more efficiently. Thank you!!!
Might be like the 10th time I find myself watching this.
Love the talk, years later for a re-watch. I agree, either unknowingly or instinctively I made choices that aligned with my values. I write down my values and review them to see if my path is still true. Extrinsic vs intrinsic rewards can cloud the way but I realized I am most content when I choose which best aligns with my values.
Years ago, with math and economics degree I had the opportunity to work on Wall Street, but I chose computer technology b/c that was my hobby as a kid. So, I chose to work at cancer hospital in technology. While I realized either choice would not necessarily be a wrong one I found my choice to be aligned best with who I am. I wish everyone much love and to enjoy your short visit in this life.
I appreciated your comment, what would advise me to do going for the hard choice that will make me feel peaceful and mentally happy or go for the one that might secure my future? Stay or quit a job
@@bochrarbh5750 the one that makes you peaceful and mentally happy. No future is secure, ever!
I listened to this talk so many times. It has changed my life. Every time I listened to it, I gleaned different layers of depths and insights into decision making and into myself - what I value, what is really important to me. It helped me "crack" this person called "myself" 😊. Thank you so mucb Ruth 🙏🙏
I always regard hard choices as chances,chances of getting to know yourself better.I first rejected my mon's will of me becoming a teacher,then I accepted it eventually.But there came the crossroad,give it up or I wouldn't be able to move forward.If it wasnt for the hard choices,I would not be able to realise I never wanted to stay in one place doing the same work everyday.I wrote down every detail of the person I wanna be.If you are already the kind of person u wanna be,there wont be hard choices.I believe that its telling you to reconsider ,to think about your future again.
Thank you for reading.
I've always been indecisive. So much I even ask what to buy, what to wear, who should i like... It's ridiculous. Maybe deep down I don't want to own up to my choices. But this video just solved years of confussion. Thank YOU!
One of the best little TED Talks in existence. A hard choice doesn't have to be a BIG choice. Once we learn to handle the small hard choices, the big choices seem less intractable. Hard choices aren't hard because we are stupid, they are hard because we pay a lot of attention to the voice in our heads that tell us what we SHOULD choose. Fear of the unknown pushes us to choose what we believe is the less risky option - usually not the best choice, in the end. We assume that values are the same as scientific measurements (x is better, worse or equal to Y), they aren't. So we have to create reasons to choose one or the other based on a range of values. Don't let the world decide for you, reflect on what you can put your agency behind. Hard choices make us fundamentally who we are. Here's where I stand, "I commit to chocolate donuts!"
this is the first Ted Talk i’ve ever seen that’s truly rocked my world. this woman’s words shook me to my core and i’m so glad i got to hear them 😊 very profound
Truly one of the best TED talks I have ever watched. Thank you for this perspective - It’s helpful.
Oh dare you ? What you say is so beautiful that you have just revolutionised my entire future. I had to choose my studies today, and you allowed me to make that choice by myself, by the person I really am and that I ignored before. Thank you so much, love from France 💕
Du coup qu'est ce que ça a donné ? Tu as choisi quoi ? Tu es épanouie depuis ce choix ?
Thank you . Honesty from the very bottom of my heart Thank you. I needed this actually, i always find myself cought up in between things and always fearing peoples Judgment after every decision. Choosing between things just tears me from within .But! Now i know that I've to choose the thing basing on who i wanna be or who I am truly. 🌻🕊
The decisions we take by reasoning are simple... In complex situations, where we cannot go by reasoning, we need take decision on who we are, what we want and where my heart is.. Of all the videos I watched, this is the most enlightening...
Never ever have a RUclips video had better timing. Thank you Ruth (and TED), much love to you.
I love the smiles from the members of the audience near the end of the speech. ☺️
I’m glad we have these ted talk as resources, they didn’t have such experts that give their opinion on what they worked for so long so easily available, i am grateful for that 🙏🏽
Ruth Chang - this video was extraordinary! Thank you. I think I will listen to it another 5 times to really get my head around it. The concept of using decisions to forge who we want to be… sounds so simple, but is quite profound.
I now know that I am a drifter, and allow the world to make decisions for me as a) I don’t like making decisions b) fear of failure. I will try to take more autonomy over each decision. Thank you
The amount of brilliantly useful information in this lecture is mind boggling...
The wisdom in the first 1 minute 49 seconds alone is astounding! Thank you so much for this video! I really wish that I had watched this video when it was first uploaded in 2014, it would certainly have helped me to have more confidence when facing hard choices. This is something I learned through my own life experience that when faced with hard choices there will be pros and cons no matter which way you turn.
Best TED talk ever 🙌 Thank you very much! We’ll always need philosophers like you!
There's something I cannot make out from her sharing. In her talk, she talked about how staying true to yourself, or letting yourself to have your own standing in hard choices really makes who we truly are. But in order to state our own reasons in hard choices, we need to have the information about the choices we face. And only by asking for other people's opinions, or considering the merits between two choices do we come to acquire the information and finally conclude of which choices fit to us.
Thank you SO MUCH. I received this talk as a wonderful gift today. It has helped me.
Wow. Such a paradigm shift in thinking... That the choices we make come from the reasons we give ourselves to make a choice.
And that drifters (guilty as charged) make choices or have difficulty to based on reasons outside of ourselves (fear, others' expectations, punishment/reward).
I feel like I could watch this multiple times and get something new out of it.
Her ideas and the way she elaborates is like ASMR to me, one of the few moments when I feel glad to be a human being who's able to understand this.
Ruth Chang you are indeed a philosopher! And a great one! Thank you so much, this is a life changing speech! Beautifully and gracefully laid out!
This is the most powerful message I've heard in my entire life.
Please explain it to me I don’t get it
@Maya Schmidt I’m still very confused lmao
I feel, this video title could be "Why hard choices are necessary" instead of "How to make hard choices".
Did you watch the whole video? She says to not focus on reasons you can write on a pros and cons list but to listen to yourself-that a hard decision is not the place to decide which option is better based on pros and cons, but to really go into yourself and think which one feels more right, which makes you happier to think about. So yes, she explains why hard choices are necessary, but she also explains how to make the choice. Stop looking at the surface of things, and look at inside of your thoughts instead.
Hey Emilie, I wish you be happy entire life.
It has been 8 months I watched, I am unable to recall my situation/surrounding when I wrote the comment.
But I will explain you the most I can,
Not sure about others, but My comment is my opinion & is strongly influenced by my emotion.
People say: we should not let emotions control our decisions,
But I always feel: I should control my emotion & let it make decisions if it wants to.
While watching the video I got something which dragged my attention.
May be the title is most suitable for everyone else, but not me.
Because I just didn't watch the video, I kept on thinking simultaneously(additional emotions). So video was longer than actually is.
I understood: One should be happy to have hard choices in life, because "Easy choices enslave us".
About "how to make hard choices": I don't care what would be my choice, I care why I had to choose.
Because no matter what choice we make, everything is uncertain in this life.
May be after 10:30 mins in the video, you might see why I felt it.
Emilie Malfoye
I disagree, because people who need this video are going to be searching on how to make a choice not why its hard.
Philosophers don't give answers...they raise more questions
That was a wonderful talk!! Absolutely loved it, thank you for sharing!
"If only netflix sent a dvd"... damn I feel old
Could listen to her All Day. Thank you, sincerely. I'm glad you became a philosopher.
I come back to this video frequently because of how helpful it is. Thank you for the Ted Talk.
My perplexity about this talk deals with finding a concrete solution to the problem. The speaker figured out in a very brilliant way what the problem is about, where the fundamental issue lies, but at the end of her speech I didn't feel like I got a new way to face hard choices.
I agree with the idea that there's no way to apply quantitative comparisons to values and so we can't say that an option is better than another. I also agree with the consideration that hard choices are chances to shape ourselves as we want to be in our life.
But, in my opinion, the real problem is here: what is the best choice if I want to be like THAT?
So many times we know what we want from life, but we can't figure out the best path to get to it. I can listen to myself, to the emotional part of me, to understand what I really want from life, what I desire, so I know how I want to shape myself, but I don't know what tools I have to choose to obtain this shape.
You LITERALLY just have to do it! Just recently I agonized over a major life decision. One day I just started the process and now, I'm on that path I wanted to be on. And you might have steps you need to take. But that's the key: take the first step! Then take another one, then another one. You gotta start stepping in the direction you want to go, or you're never gonna get there. Ask yourself this: if you knew you were leaving this world today or tomorrow, will you regret not at least taking that step to just SEE if you could be who/what you wanted to be? It's not so much about the end game, it's more about the journey and the experiences along the way. That's what this thing called life is: all our experiences shape who we are. Now go be great, babe!
It is important to know yourself to make this kind of choice. If you don't, it is certainly more difficult to use that path. There are ways to find out about inner motivations and needs that are closely connected to the very special person that you are. Maybe you need to find out more about yourself to make good choices for yourself.
Emilio Andreozzi you explained that beautifully.
I believe The path that should be taken is the one that excites the most, the one that feels like an extension of who we are. The one that is aligned with our purpose & what we value.
I also believe, When we begin to build a relationship with ourself, we are able to predict our path much better through the opportunities & “coincidences” that appears in our life as a sign that we are on the right track.
Whatever you do on the daily basis keep doing it! No matter what,Always show up to your commitments and always do the best you can . That’s all you can do. The skills you learn & what you value will be your vehicle to your better life .
Just do research if you know what you want and want to the the objectively better thing to get you there
Liliane Bruse but that’s just the thing, I’m trying to figure out who I am rn. I have the opportunity to stay in 3 different places that would help me learn me in different areas of myself.
I've always gone Science-mode on these things.
Amazing! Thought evoking and insightful that she CHOSE to see hard choices this way, and shared it.
I'M the one writing this Book!
Very helpful, was just deciding whether to leave a place or to commute and was making a reasons why not to move, while everyone around me just pushed me to save money. You are changing my life! Thank you
Wow. Just wow. I never thought I would benefit from a TED talk as much as I did from this one. I won't be a drifter. Thank you for sharing your wisdom 🙏
Enlightening! I watch this each time I have a hard decision to make.
I think the movie 'Mr.Nobody' is the best illustration of this ted talk. Or, this talk is the best conclusion of the movie.
Excellent presentation on hard choices. I can't imagine it being presented any better. Thanks so much for the eye-opening and mind-opening information!
Very well justified speech , I think it was perfectly put together on how you need to find yourself and what you would like to be defined as also i read a comment earlier saying " when something bad happens you have three choices you can let it define you let it destroy you or let it strengthen you" I think that is learnt by bad decisions and even if they occur nothing happened you cant blame yourself as you couldnt have known. I think you just cant overthink too much as that will just make you feel worse you need to simply give things a try
Exactly the video I needed right now, I have a really hard time choosing between two schools and both have equal amounts of positives and negatives, so this really helps me on the way to choose :)
Iam going through the same exact problem , I don’t know what school to choose 😢 any advice?
"We are condemned to be free" - Sartre
I think this is the best "Choice" video I've ever seen. We have the ability to assign reason within ourselves to become the person we wish to through hard choices. Therefore they are not a curse but a blessing.
When making hard choices:
Acknowledge they are hard because there is no best alternative. They are blessings; easy choices are passively detrimental.
To solve hard choices: Exercise your agency by looking within. Your stance, your voice, your values matter ultimately in tough decisions. Be proactive (owning up to choices), not reactive (a drifter succumbing to easy choices), and ensure to weigh hard choices by their potential to you rather than qualities of those choices.
Another excellent TED Talk, indeed.
The most difficult part of making a 'hard choice' is immediately overcome when you have a mission statement. Write one for yourself. Now.
One of the best TED talk for sure. Thank you!
Many years ago I read the book Smart Choices, by Hammond, Keeney, and Raiffa. It was good, but I always felt it was missing something, and this video finally showed me what it was. Thanks so very much!
2 SENTENCE SUMMARY: Hard choice? Whole-heartedly chose from "inside" yourself and don't let societal pressures or fear of the unknown factor into your rational yet non-scientific decision.
had to make a choice like that 3 weeks ago. most painful decision of my life, but I still feel like I did the right thing, even though it is deathly painful to me, my deep felt anxiety has gone away mostly. I had to choose what felt MORE right.
recognizing what hard choices are and when they come up is vital. she's not talking about all 'hard choices'.
Curious... what kind of decision was this?
not quite...
THANK U I NEEDED THAT
I can't belive I've waited this long to figure out what questions to ask. You answered it. Thank you. God bless you
This helped me a bit. About to graduate from a degree in psychology and I'm stuck between medicine and clinical psychology as a career. It's a decision that bothers me all the time because I am terrified of making a mistake.
Ultimately, what did you choose?
6 years later, what did you end up choosing?
6 years later what did u end up choosing
What did you choose
^
Best if watched multiple times. So many gems. Make sure you get everything she is saying.
Very powerful and life changing advice that I am going to stick to (or rather have already stuck to but never knew the right words for it) - “Reflect on what you can put your agency behind, in what you can be for, and through Hard choices, become that person”. Thanks for this amazing message and tech talk 🙏😊
This is really interesting, wish I found it sooner.
I'm so glad this wasn't another follow your passion video. This was surprisingly clear, lucid and enlightened
omg, being amazed by her analysis, expression and insight
Thank you so much! I am facing a hard choice, whether to age in place, or move to a retirement community. These are choices that, for me, seem very much on par. Now I see this as a choice of the person I want to grow into. I think I know now which choice I will make.
You may consider picking the choice that will lead to more possibilities. Never close loop on yourself.
Rayne Ma what do you mean never close loop
JUST DO IT! Dont let dreams be dreams. DO IT! Yesterday u said tomorrow JUST DO IT!
Aleksandar Nikolovski who else understands this comment?
Trulee Y Anybody who saw Shia Labeouf.
millions of people, but few of them have actually seen the comment itself.
I just might.
This is the best Ted talk I've ever seen. Blow my mind
Oh, I really, really liked this. Thank you. Going to share with several friends. Seems to me this way of looking at hard choices is true on the individual level and the societal level.
We create our own reasons that ultimately defines us.
Oh wow
I watched this just at the right time.
It's important to examine and understand motives behind the choices we make. And sometimes the choice isn't hard to ourselves, but based on external factors (finances, convenience, the opinion of others) the fear outweighs the original conviction of the choice. Basically the message here is - don't make choices on these transient factors. They won't be a constant in your life, but YOU will. And you will live with your choices, always.
How do you know you are not making the decision based on what she is saying?
If they are telling you what to do, you do not know how to make decisions.
This insight upends the conventional view of decision-making as a stressful task. Chang eloquently communicated that these choices are not just about selecting between options but also defining who we are as individuals. These decision-making moments are indeed opportunities to manifest our values. It's a beautiful sentiment and a mindset I'll carry into future decisions.
Amazing Thank you so much. This is the only person that makes any sense to me when it comes to this topic, everyone says "do what's best for you" or " it doesn't matter" which aren't great options. I suspected about the complexity she mentions of how things can't be measured in a scientific way and all that but I couldn't quite figure out these things at such a clear level like she did in this video. Anyway, this has opened my eyes, at least now I feel closer to making a hard decision in my life and not completely lost like I used to.
This is the single best video I have ever watched on RUclips. And I like to watch it again every now and then.
+Mercedes Fan Why do you say that?
This video reminded me of the movie "Mr. Nobody"...
ruclips.net/video/ANUunK6kiqU/видео.html&vl=en
amazing speacher, I also always come back when I have to face a tough decition. Specially the last part, is really spiring
Excellent. I wish she gave more lectures. Reminds me of Viktor Frankl's lectures about finding meaning in ones life to make it fulfilling. Without "meaning" people drift all over and are usually unhappy.
I love how they casually show Esther Perel sitting in the crowd :D
Was that her?!?
@@natattacc99 12:18
Very interesting and enlightening but making it no easier to make hard choices.
wow, what an incredible talk. overwhelmed me with its truth. i may have teared up a little...
One of my fav tedtalks, will forever carry it with me.
Thank you for making this talk and saving my life.
Amazing and insightful lecture! Loved it!
Probably one of the best/most influential Ted talks I have ever listened to.
This was Amazing!
Thank you for sharing these words of wisdom!
Now I understand why I reject college: I must fight the institutionalization and systematization of human learning.
gay lol
The ironical thing is, the lecturer who inspired you to this understanding is 'professor' of jurisprudence at 'Oxford'.
But the reason we have become scuba successful filling functioning society is because we have institutions. It depends o. What your values are. We might be living in tents and dirty floors if it wasnt for the economy and school educating us on how to make civilization work.
*Now* you do? This comment tells me you rejected challenge, as you just realized why you made a big decision, without thinking. Had you considered you could better achieve your goal of _'fighting the institutionalization and systematization of human learning'_ after receiving a degree? Anyway, perhaps finish high school before thinking about rejecting college.