Stuttering, Vulnerability, and Intimacy | Christopher Constantino | TEDxFSU

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  • Опубликовано: 24 дек 2024

Комментарии • 111

  • @elikplimnuvor9670
    @elikplimnuvor9670 Год назад +52

    I'm a medical student who stutters. And its a discipline where speaking within a fixed amount of time involves a greater percentage of your grade to pass. I've had some good and bad days but that's not stopping me.

  • @charlotteblayke
    @charlotteblayke Год назад +98

    I cried the entire video , never felt so understood in my life

  • @scottm.9335
    @scottm.9335 Год назад +33

    “You know what stuttering sounds like but you don’t know what it feels like” brought tears to my eyes. So very true and this is the companion that is with us with every syllable. His descriptions are so deeply true. I wish more of my listeners could inherently understand this as they communicate with me.
    Thankfully, like him, in my 50’s I’m more settled with myself after years of interventions, love of family, and lots of small successes, I’m less worried about the judgement of others and this has made all the difference.
    “It’s an invitation for others to be vulnerable” is also so true. It’s opened so many doors to authentic conversations and relationships.

  • @zinzincoetzee1934
    @zinzincoetzee1934 Год назад +34

    I can feel the emotion in every word he's saying. This was really powerful. Its really inspiring to see fellow stutterers on Tedtalks

  • @mrorange484
    @mrorange484 Год назад +21

    I needed to hear this today. I've been stuttering my whole life, had speech therapy, and now at 34 years old, its starting to re-emurge. The embarrassment, frustration, and overall hoplessness is something I struggle with to this day. But hearing others talk about it, and relate can really help. Sometimes it builds up so much, that I just have to go to a secluded place and allow myself to cry for a few minutes just to relieve some of the emotional pressure. Thank you so much.

    • @MYDEEPTHOUGHTS2023
      @MYDEEPTHOUGHTS2023 Год назад +1

      Sad to know your struggles
      Please try to do inner engineering
      To get more clarity about what to
      Do.

    • @yawyaw8281
      @yawyaw8281 11 месяцев назад

      ​@@MYDEEPTHOUGHTS2023what is inner engineering

  • @Maria-fc9hw
    @Maria-fc9hw 2 года назад +77

    I'm 18 y o and I have stuttering as long as I remember myself. It's genetic. My father stutters too. Everyday I search for some ways to get rid of my problems. Because these blocks make my life quite difficult. I study at university and so many thoughts about quitting. I am scared to talk over and over again. I don't loose fear, it only becomes stronger. And I want to be free of this. Because I know I can talk better, I do it when I'm less stressed. But sometimes it seems impossible to get rid of stutter

    • @tejkumar9018
      @tejkumar9018 2 года назад +5

      i see myself in you, you're not alone

    • @princeugochukwu9341
      @princeugochukwu9341 2 года назад +5

      I stutter too. I understand this situation.

    • @zinzincoetzee1934
      @zinzincoetzee1934 Год назад +1

      My father stutters too. I got mine from him.

    • @junaidkhan5719
      @junaidkhan5719 Год назад +1

      I also has the problem and it's genetic my father and grandfather have the problem, my father still stammer but I cured myself I want to give you one advice No one can completely cure your stutter expect one, it is you only you can cure yourself

    • @onemillionsubsnocontent7798
      @onemillionsubsnocontent7798 Год назад

      bro i’m 18 as well brother , you’re not alone man im struggling to find a job because of it right now

  • @trevinarrington2659
    @trevinarrington2659 10 месяцев назад +1

    I’ve stuttered my entire life. I love how he explains the feeling. This was an amazing speech

  • @klein07-l7j
    @klein07-l7j 8 месяцев назад +7

    I loved this, its a nightmare trying to go through conversations every day, the shame of feeling smaller to someone just because i cant speak confidently is something i can never explain, i always tell myself its gonna be better but that just sets a false expectation which is met with stronger disappointment. Its easier said that done but I trust that once stutterers like me can live alongside it, thats when it cannot hold you down anymore

  • @stopplzs
    @stopplzs 2 года назад +83

    the worst is when trying to say my name. like my mouth gets stuck. i literally just spell it out sometimes to avoid the embarrassment

    • @aust816
      @aust816 2 года назад +9

      Dude same. Whenever someone asks whats my name or when you meet people and they say their name and you’re expected to say your name, I just get stuck. Especially going to Starbucks, jamba or takeout places where they ask for your name after you order instead of giving you a receipt with a number lol, those get me.

    • @Kiyesey
      @Kiyesey Год назад +3

      Same bro me also. Many times just i asked them is my name necessary for u instead of giving my name 😃😃

    • @wiximar
      @wiximar Год назад +3

      Same for me. I do have a stutter but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be. Sometimes voice-to-text is really hard because of it. But still it is nowhere near as bad as whenever I was in elementary school.

    • @wiximar
      @wiximar Год назад +2

      Yeah I just realized the reason I do music is because I stuttered whenever I was a little kid. I found a rhythm. That's what works for me. I still stutter, but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be.

    • @OOOO-yz1lb
      @OOOO-yz1lb Год назад +2

      I'm getting to the point where I give an easier name to strangers I'm so exhausted ):

  • @clarkjoh8948
    @clarkjoh8948 2 года назад +8

    This video is strong : I've had a stutter since I was a toddler : having a stutter is tough : I don't have it as much as I used to

  • @greenpumpkin172
    @greenpumpkin172 7 дней назад +1

    7:06 Yes, because you are in contact with your deeply suppressed trauma which makes us deeply vulnerable and shamefull.

  • @iRippIe
    @iRippIe 2 года назад +40

    This was amazing. It was my first time listening to a talk like this and as a life long stutterer it was incredibly validating to say the least. Thank you Chris for sharing this. It was incredibly brave and profound

  • @abolacadernos7164
    @abolacadernos7164 Год назад +4

    I always thought I would live forever with my stutter, but thankfully I found a book by Lee Lovett called “How to Stop Stuttering & Love Speaking”. This book will literally speak to your SOUL and it will help you with your speech, but more importantly your mind.

  • @jamesdickerson2466
    @jamesdickerson2466 2 года назад +20

    Spot on Chris. I have stuttered my entire life and after being forced to look for the silver lining, I understand that it is the vulnerability which I bring to my interactions with others that is my power. Thank you for your TED Talk!

  • @anthonydimambro8912
    @anthonydimambro8912 5 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you Chris for this talk. You encapsulated what stuttering feels like. This talk will give strength and hope to people that stutter.

  • @morriswilburn9858
    @morriswilburn9858 3 месяца назад +3

    If you have stuttered since early childhood and still do by your early 20’s, you probably have developed beliefs and perceptions about yourself, and emotions, that have created more problems than your stuttering does. Those may be shame, low self-confidence, feelings of inferiority, using stuttering as an excuse for not trying to achieve your goals in life, and on and on. The Cleveland Clinic, which is one of the most authoritative organizations on stuttering that I know of, recently asserted that "Nearly 40% of children between 12 and 17 who stutter also have conditions like anxiety or depression. Adults who stutter are twice as likely to develop similar conditions and three times more likely to develop personality disorders". I recommend that a stutterer perform an honest examination of himself and take the appropriate actions. The place to start may be to educate yourself about stuttering; a good place is start is the book "Stuttering: From Shame and Anxiety to Confident Authenticity" by Hanan Hurwitz.

    • @ibra5760
      @ibra5760 3 месяца назад

      20 turning 21 next month, I don't stutter publicly as much as I used to before, I have more confidence than I used to have 5-6 years ago, I can talk to people many times without stuttering. But I do indeed still stutter, and I suffer from anxiety sometimes when I face certain situations, and my anxiety booms when I stutter mid-conversation.
      I'll check out the book, Thanks a lot!

    • @mattbritz5066
      @mattbritz5066 2 месяца назад

      Best way to cure stuttering is to put yourself in situations where you feel the most vulnerable and scared and immerse yourself in it and overcome that fear. Ie talking on a phone to the bank. Do it every day and watch how less anxiety you get after the experiences

    • @morriswilburn9858
      @morriswilburn9858 2 месяца назад

      @@mattbritz5066 I have heard other people who stutter have that same experience. Others took the opposite approach, and it worked for them. That is, begin speaking in the least intimidating situations they can find. Then gradually get into speaking into intimidating ones.

  • @infamouspineapple2175
    @infamouspineapple2175 2 года назад +7

    Literally tearing up at how you explained it. Comparing it to writing is perfect!

  • @nicholasgoad9685
    @nicholasgoad9685 7 месяцев назад

    I’ve stuttered my whole life and all I can say is I love this guy, I’ve never felt understood and never understood my stutter before

  • @toughlovestutter
    @toughlovestutter Год назад +6

    Awesome! Iv stuttered my whole life and never thought about it like that. I made myself stop stuttering. Got so sick of it I took whatever drastic steps necessary. Thank you for your work, your a rock star man!

  • @rudyyy-ghi
    @rudyyy-ghi 5 месяцев назад

    Well said. You just put how I feel in the words that I would have never been able to.

  • @DanGichuhi-xx6gi
    @DanGichuhi-xx6gi Год назад

    It's feels good that someone out there understands about stammering

  • @willprytz
    @willprytz 6 месяцев назад

    This is one video that I go back to and watch again from time to time. It such a great speech and your messages are so good and just changed my view of stuttering. I love the story about the "notes" and I have used it myself to try to explain what having a stutter can feel like. And the part of acceptance is for sure what has helped me a lot. I still stutter the same amount as before, but I don't see it as a problem anymore. You are one of my role model and you inspired me to share a bit of my own story at my channel. Thank you! 🙏

  • @MyStutteringLife
    @MyStutteringLife 2 года назад +2

    Dr. Chris Constantino is INSPIRATIONAL and I had the honor of interviewing him for my podcast.

  • @patrickcampbell238
    @patrickcampbell238 2 года назад +9

    Thank you Chris. What a beautiful Ted Talk.

  • @Awake129
    @Awake129 Год назад

    I’m proud of everyone of you. I know it’s not easy. I just wanted to tell you that.

  • @minamamdouh5261
    @minamamdouh5261 2 года назад +3

    Best speech i've heard about stuttering!

  • @maymindmusic1680
    @maymindmusic1680 2 года назад +7

    This was amazing. Thank you Dr. Constantino.

  • @cynthiadacillo-tartamudez2228
    @cynthiadacillo-tartamudez2228 2 года назад +11

    👏 Thank you for sharing such a powerful message ❤

  • @6Twisted
    @6Twisted 2 года назад +5

    This guy has a stutter and talks better than me. I'm autistic spectrum and don't enunciate properly.

  • @TheDURWAS
    @TheDURWAS Год назад +1

    If you're somehow here or watching this, i hope u will come over it someday

  • @kjp81
    @kjp81 2 года назад +5

    Well done, well said! Coming from a life long pws!

  • @jandevries57
    @jandevries57 Год назад

    That was very well said Kevin.

  • @김철용의영상편집
    @김철용의영상편집 2 года назад +3

    It's very touching!!

  • @kathirr2438
    @kathirr2438 Год назад

    Can’t thank you enough!

  • @jessybee1248
    @jessybee1248 Год назад +4

    Have had the issue since birth and it's still a problem till date,,,it has really lowered my self esteem,,,l no longer appy for jobs since most jobs lately have interviews and l don't wanna feel embarrassed in that interview,,,have even given up in most cases

    • @sandeepsinghsandhu8418
      @sandeepsinghsandhu8418 10 месяцев назад

      I don't know if you are still at it but your stammering should not stop you from applying to jobs. Believe me there are people out there who understand and I feel what you want to speak is more important than how you speak it.
      It's been more than a year since you wrote a comment so I am hoping you made some progress in yourself . I just wanna tell you that stammering doesnot define anyone. It is not a choice to stammer.

  • @you-ry2bh
    @you-ry2bh 2 года назад +2

    thank you for motivating ,it means a lot for us ..pheww! released some stess rn,,,,,

  • @ksilofo
    @ksilofo 2 года назад +1

    Beautifully said!

  • @thestutterverse
    @thestutterverse 2 года назад +2

    Amazing Chris

  • @tiffdavis5191
    @tiffdavis5191 2 года назад +1

    Thank you 🙏🏽 ❤️

  • @ytchannel-howtooutgrowstutteri
    @ytchannel-howtooutgrowstutteri 2 года назад +1

    Great video Ted!

  • @isaiahhealey6323
    @isaiahhealey6323 Год назад

    i loved this

  • @Dhananjay___
    @Dhananjay___ Год назад +1

    I think he is Superman

  • @manipurihunabopa
    @manipurihunabopa 20 дней назад

    Although your example is creative and fresh, it is not appropriate for describing the difficulties of a stutterer.
    It's a more dehumanizing experience, worse than all kind of shame anybody can imagine. I felt it myself.

  • @gustavoconforti268
    @gustavoconforti268 2 года назад +2

    wow that was something

  • @wiximar
    @wiximar Год назад +1

    I wish it was more understandable how difficult voice-to-text is for me. Don't get me wrong, my stutter is nowhere near as bad as it used to be but still. For me it was real real real bad in elementary

  • @Rafael-Bravo
    @Rafael-Bravo Год назад

    What has helped me tons is reading the book How To Run Your Own Life by Jut Meininger (as long as I apply it I eliminate it completely) (when you read it you'll realize that you have to turn off your Adapted Child state and little by little train your Parent state so your Adapted child doesn't intervene)... you can download it (they don't print it anymore)

  • @dlovan1998
    @dlovan1998 Год назад

    You won’t feel until you have same problem

  • @slimesushi
    @slimesushi 11 месяцев назад +1

    I don't know if i can do this anymore

  • @overlordorton1196
    @overlordorton1196 Год назад +4

    Life is hard man

  • @stepanthomas551
    @stepanthomas551 Год назад

    If you think this guy is stuttering you’ve never seen me

    • @shortviking89
      @shortviking89 2 месяца назад

      He's gotten better and you will too. I'm a lifer like you, and it's really affected me. Can't fit in so can't keep a job where there's a bunch of people, etc. But, sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do. I often cuss to break the tension of getting the word out. I learn to laugh with people who genuinely find it funny because it's different. When you deliberately start mocking is when it harmful to the stutterer. You develop a philosophy on life.

  • @devilreaper4809
    @devilreaper4809 Год назад

    why no one tells exercise for stuttering ? how to cure it ?

  • @ks.2628
    @ks.2628 Год назад +1

    You have come far Christopher! However, stuttering is not genetic. Some people might be more genetically predisposed to stuttering as they are sensitive. Anyway, stuttering should be called holding back.The "problem" is between your ears and the good thing is that it is possible dissolve stuttering but it might require hard work. Those who are interested should read John Harrisons book Redefining Stuttering and then Strategies for disabling he hexagon. Lee Lovett has a very good program to deal with stuttering and a good book that should be read.

  • @libbahickssophia1613
    @libbahickssophia1613 2 года назад +16

    My daughter has been stammering for 3 years , she cry’s every day because her friends laughed in school! God 🙏🏻🙏🏻 Dr. Isibor for his Supplements brought joy 🤩 to me and my daughter I’m so grateful 😊 alternative Herb’s is the best treatment you need

  • @kubilaykaragoz7556
    @kubilaykaragoz7556 2 года назад +1

    duyarsızlaşın diyor yani öyle mi

  • @GauravTamta-zm1ub
    @GauravTamta-zm1ub Год назад

    oh my god he looks exactly like henry cavill

  • @LyfeDeath
    @LyfeDeath 3 месяца назад

    Left pant leg is killing me🤦🏾‍♂️

  • @danny8911
    @danny8911 2 года назад

    😅

  • @JacobDover-s4m
    @JacobDover-s4m 17 дней назад

    People make fun of people who stutter it needs to stop.
    Robert Snyder of Lewistown Montana l know you don't make fun of Jacob Dover of Lewistown Montana who stutters 👍.

  • @brechtdta
    @brechtdta Год назад +1

    I wonder if anyone who doesn't stutter watches these videos lol

    • @sarahbuffey1202
      @sarahbuffey1202 Год назад +4

      Yup. I don’t have a stutter but I was wondering if I could include a character who stutters in a book I’m writing. I’m trying to research as much as possible, but reading and listening to people’s experiences are very helpful and insightful. :)

  • @randallscott1643
    @randallscott1643 2 года назад +6

    @randallscott1643
    7 months ago
    I think stuttering is caused by a traumatic event between the ages of 2-7. As a Clinical Hypnotherapist I have found the cause of 100% of my clients. anything from a dog barking in a child's face, to a child seeing some one get shot. This is the spectrum that I have worked with. If any one has any questions about finding the cause of your stutter, please let me know. I think if you can find the cause, you can get to the cure. Thank you for your time

    • @kjs1069
      @kjs1069 9 месяцев назад +1

      Hey Randall. I'm interested in exploring the cause of mine.

    • @randallscott1643
      @randallscott1643 8 месяцев назад

      @@kjs1069 So do you know what caused your stutter, and at what age did the stutter start?