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Regarding "Tampo," I really liked what one Filipino woman said her Expat husband told her when they were still dating/engaged. He said (paraphrasing here), "If you're obviously upset (not talking/sulking) and I ask you what's wrong and you don't want to discuss it, tell me and I'll give you space and we can discuss it when you're ready. On the other hand, giving me the "silent treatment" (Tampo) and I ask "what' wrong"" and you say "nothing" but continue to retreat and sulk, this is disrespectful and immature behavior. Life's too short, and you need to understand if you engage in this behavior, it won't work and we'll have to part ways." She said she knew he was right and stopped using Tampo and is glad he drew the line.
Very informative, yes the silent treatment has been the greatest challenge but it doesn't last forever and I've found ways to break the silence. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. It seems to be ingrained in the culture.
I’m married 7.5 yrs and I agree and have experienced all the same stuff! But I wouldn’t trade any of it for a western partner lol. Wife is from Davao but she wants to explore Negros to put that “distance” between her and those people that could/would come easily knocking if we were too local.
Nice video Gio. Moving there soon, but lived there off and on for 10 years prior to the Plandemic. Two things, Don't ever feel like you will offend someone by not eating their food. I only eat meat and I tell them so. Fortunately, the chicken there is really good as it is open range. The pigs are fed pig food or open range. So they taste the same as the USA. And I never allow any fish in my house except fresh fish. About the family, If your girl, before you meet her, is providing for her family, agree to keep that amount going. It won't be very much Less than $150 USD for sure. I will also pay for major medical care for anyone in her immediate family. But I am definitely NOT living on the same island as her parents.
I had 2 Filipina wives both of them went with me to the US. First marriage was 5 years and second was 15 years. I found that both of them liked to adopt the parts of both cultures that benefit them the most.
Yep, from tampo to jealousy to pointing at things with their lips and extremely vague directions on where something is 😂😂 Love Gary’s T-shirt. IMO opinion with the family you want to live close enough that you can go and visit for the day but not close enough so your house is an open invite. I’d say 1-2 hours away.
This is just my opinion, but I believe the guy on the left is really in for a world of disappointment. He’s hitting all of the classic western guy in Philippines no-nos: long distance relationships, thinking you can take your bride back to the US successfully, and not really being as into the local culture as you like to think you are.
Geez, Darrell has some guns there. My Filipina wife had some tampo fits in the beginning of our marriage, but after 12 years of marriage can not remember the last time she had a tampo fit. We did have a lot of communication problems in the beginning. Would really get mad and sometimes I do still because I feel she is not really listening, am guessing it is harder for her to understand American English and sometimes she guesses what I am saying. My brother in law says he goes through the same thing with communication and says its easier to just let it go and not get upset about it. Harder to do then to say though if you ask me. Have to have an outdoor 2 burner gas cooker outside, for the dried fish, no doubt about it. Family first, agree with Gary though, not to live too close to the family but make it clear in the beginning about money. That you are not going to support the family or if you are what the limits are. Stick to your restrictions and you will be fine. Good video, Gio...Jim
The new laws that force Filipinas to support their families are an indirect way to dip into foreigners' pockets by association. The court may assume her 50% of marriage's assets and BOOM there you go! Why 'd anyone want to get married in 2024 in general much less to a Filipina with such toxic "Utang Na Loob" nonsense, no divorce, adultery laws and double standards against foreigners is beyond me. But to each their own.
It's cheaper to rent than buy What the PI government doesn't understand is that they will de-incentivize marriage like what they did in the west with no fault divorce and alimony. Why get married at that point? And a lot of people going to the phils don't, they just date perpetually. The only downside is...well, there isn't any. LOL. You could argue its harder to get a visa, but with a 3 year tourist visa, it doesn't make sense to get married for a visa.
The subject I would like to hear more about is Jealousy in Filipinas... My soon-to-be Filipina wife is INSANELY jealous. Any problems we have all seem to come from that... There is no reason for her jealousy either. She admits she can't help it. It worries me.
If I may? Respectfully, these things don’t fix themselves. Many times the extent or extreme is suppressed prior to marriage. I would encourage you to get counseling somehow, maybe virtual, before committing to marriage. It’s for you as well as her. I failed marriage is a waste of precious years. Good luck and God bless you.
This is a cultural character defect that probably won’t improve with time. Many filipinas response to jealousy is to put her man in a straight jacket which is not a solution that I could ever live with.
It's a great vid and I salute all of you.. But respectfully unless you're a fly on the wall or speak Cebuano fluently.. Then you're only guessing about family dynamics.. It's like watching a silent movie.. I too have met a lot of ppl , I speak the language enough to basically understand stuff... It's the everyday chatter
You guys are spot on. I'm doing an LDR like Darryl and we are similar aged couples. When she askes me if I'm talking to other girls and I say no one she starts crying. She says you are really not talking to me. Then I go no baby hang on. Then i get bunch of sad emojies. Then I say I'm not talking to any girls but you lol. This kind of thing happens frequently.
Cool panel-With ex Flipina living in the 🇺🇸-pro-thankful forever for what you gave her/loyalty/took care of my mom and dad/good hygiene & the Cons-send too much $ home/jealousy/gossip/rice addict daily/spam/smelly dried fish/expensive pacific islander markets-However my girls are ambitious/humanistic/studious/financially secure! They think I am crazy moving to Asia (that’s ’ how your kids or step kids will probably think if you bring them to the 🇺🇸 or born here)
With all due respect. Three middle aged, successful, good looking guys…and you’re ‘dealing’ with tampo?? Nope. Not even from Miss Philippines. End that. Its not cute. Its not funny later. Its childish and unnecessary.
When I was young, my mother never tolerated "tampo". Therefore, there is no such thing as "tampo" in our household. Another thing, supporting the extended family in the Philippine culture would most likely happen if a foreigner married into a family with no/few resources. Hence, such a woman would resort to marrying a foreigner to help the family from poverty (noble cause, I guess). The dynamics would be different if a foreigner is fortunate enough to find an educated filipina woman from a traditional Philippine family. Chances are she'd come from a family with more than enough resources (with highly educated siblings too) to not rely on a foreign in-law and she'd be a woman who keeps traditional Filipino values (family first, taking care of the husband and kids being the top priority, etc.) even though she is more than capable of earning money in her own right. However, such a Filipina would most likely marry a Filipino coming from the same background.
The Only Dating Website I recommend to meet serious Filipinas
bit.ly/RecommendedDatingSite
-------------------------------------------------------------
The only VPN I trust and use personally: Surfshark
get.surfshark.net/aff_c?offer_id=934&aff_id=17091&url_id=1320
----------------------------------------------
Contact Michael Onstead for Medical Insurance for The Philippines:
FB: facebook.com/monstad1 or e-mail: michael.onstad@loc-consultants.com
-------------------------------------------------
Gio's Essentials Traveling List (Must have items for living or traveling in the Philippines)
Order today!
www.amazon.com/shop/giointhephilippines
------------------------------------------------------------------
How I receive my mail overseas safely:
travelingmailbox.com/?ref=1384
-----------------------------------------------
Wise get your first transfer for free:
bit.ly/2Z4xxfZ
----------------------------------------------------------------------
If you would like to buy me a coffee:
www.buymeacoffee.com/italiagio71
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Visiting or moving to The Philippines? 1 on 1 Consultation with Gio: Contact me at: giointhephilippines.com/ (For a free consultation join my patreon today)
-----------------------------------------------------------
My Patreon account: Over 80 Exclusive videos not found on RUclips and free consultations and apparel with silver level and higher.
www.patreon.com/giointhephilippines
JOIN as a Member to get exclusive videos not shared on the main channel!
ruclips.net/channel/UClMlXTxpTNMZRE4AEjlc5RAjoin
-------------------------------------------------------------
Check out my website for more information on the Philippines.
giointhephilippines.com/
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Need a Throw away ticket, look no further $16 for a valid ticket ( I use this all the time).
onwardticket.com/giointhephilippines
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Book your hotel when traveling with my link for the best deals:
bit.ly/38CvDgr
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Travel Medical Insurance I personally use:
visitorscoverage.tp.st/f6dHJDqB
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you would like to help support my channel: paypal.me/GioSanTeaching
----------------------------------------------------------
Contact Information:
Instagram: instagram.com/gio_in_the_ph/
FB: facebook.com/GiointhePhilippines
Contact me by visiting my website and clicking contact Gio
giointhephilippines.com
AFFILIATE DISCLOSURE: Some of the links on this channel are affiliate links, meaning, at NO additional cost to you, I may earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase and/or subscribe.
I like the format of three men coming together having a conversation. Please do it again.
Absolutely 💯
Regarding "Tampo," I really liked what one Filipino woman said her Expat husband told her when they were still dating/engaged. He said (paraphrasing here), "If you're obviously upset (not talking/sulking) and I ask you what's wrong and you don't want to discuss it, tell me and I'll give you space and we can discuss it when you're ready. On the other hand, giving me the "silent treatment" (Tampo) and I ask "what' wrong"" and you say "nothing" but continue to retreat and sulk, this is disrespectful and immature behavior. Life's too short, and you need to understand if you engage in this behavior, it won't work and we'll have to part ways." She said she knew he was right and stopped using Tampo and is glad he drew the line.
Let her be tampo and do your own thing with a smile. Wait her out and she will come around. Consider it time to read a good book.
This is amazing and it's good that all 3 of you represents the long, new and middle married years. Way to go ☺️☺️☺️
Thank you so much!!
i agree with Geo, the langue barrier that comes with being able to easily offend them can be stressing.
Thank you guys for understanding our culture and so patient with it. I hope you will not explode someday if your patient is running out. Thank you.
Very informative, yes the silent treatment has been the greatest challenge but it doesn't last forever and I've found ways to break the silence. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. It seems to be ingrained in the culture.
I’m married 7.5 yrs and I agree and have experienced all the same stuff! But I wouldn’t trade any of it for a western partner lol. Wife is from Davao but she wants to explore Negros to put that “distance” between her and those people that could/would come easily knocking if we were too local.
Distance is good.
Great video Gio.
Thanks!
Great video! I'm married to a Philippina for 20 years and I agree with everything you guys said! Compo is fun...real quite. 😅
That is awesome!
good segment Gio.
busy day at The Henry that day! several vlogs with all those players. :) (and the ladies)
Nice video Gio. Moving there soon, but lived there off and on for 10 years prior to the Plandemic. Two things, Don't ever feel like you will offend someone by not eating their food. I only eat meat and I tell them so. Fortunately, the chicken there is really good as it is open range. The pigs are fed pig food or open range. So they taste the same as the USA. And I never allow any fish in my house except fresh fish. About the family, If your girl, before you meet her, is providing for her family, agree to keep that amount going. It won't be very much Less than $150 USD for sure. I will also pay for major medical care for anyone in her immediate family. But I am definitely NOT living on the same island as her parents.
Nice to see 3 Expats actually in shape and not let themselves go !! like the majority you see over in Cebu and Duma !!
Gio, another great informational video.
Great stuff. Gio have a great trip back to the states!!!
Thanks! Will do!
Great interview!
Nice video, I’d like to see similar ones in the future.
More to come!
Great video GIO!!!
Good format. Different and insightful
Nice video GIO...Thanks
Thank you too!
You guys are so funny!!! I’m Filipina …. And laughing so hard!!!
😂 glad you enjoyed
😂 I feel sorry for the wife of the first guy but he looks the part🤣
I had 2 Filipina wives both of them went with me to the US. First marriage was 5 years and second was 15 years. I found that both of them liked to adopt the parts of both cultures that benefit them the most.
Would that be any different to any other immigrant?
That was his mistake, don't take them back to the USA.
@@GiointhePhilippines Could be the guy thats the common denominator, not the Filipinas.
Yep, from tampo to jealousy to pointing at things with their lips and extremely vague directions on where something is 😂😂
Love Gary’s T-shirt. IMO opinion with the family you want to live close enough that you can go and visit for the day but not close enough so your house is an open invite. I’d say 1-2 hours away.
Didn’t you say you will be back in the USA in May? I remember you said you already have your ticket.
I arrived May 31st. I'm here now
@@GiointhePhilippines nice, welcome back after such a long time!
Annual trip now.
This is just my opinion, but I believe the guy on the left is really in for a world of disappointment. He’s hitting all of the classic western guy in Philippines no-nos: long distance relationships, thinking you can take your bride back to the US successfully, and not really being as into the local culture as you like to think you are.
Geez, Darrell has some guns there. My Filipina wife had some tampo fits in the beginning of our marriage, but after 12 years of marriage can not remember the last time she had a tampo fit. We did have a lot of communication problems in the beginning. Would really get mad and sometimes I do still because I feel she is not really listening, am guessing it is harder for her to understand American English and sometimes she guesses what I am saying. My brother in law says he goes through the same thing with communication and says its easier to just let it go and not get upset about it. Harder to do then to say though if you ask me.
Have to have an outdoor 2 burner gas cooker outside, for the dried fish, no doubt about it. Family first, agree with Gary though, not to live too close to the family but make it clear in the beginning about money. That you are not going to support the family or if you are what the limits are. Stick to your restrictions and you will be fine.
Good video, Gio...Jim
I was proud of my guns till I sat next to Darrell 😂😂
@@GiointhePhilippines LOL
Enjoyed the chat, cheers.
Glad you enjoyed it
The new laws that force Filipinas to support their families are an indirect way to dip into foreigners' pockets by association.
The court may assume her 50% of marriage's assets and BOOM there you go!
Why 'd anyone want to get married in 2024 in general much less to a Filipina with such toxic "Utang Na Loob" nonsense, no divorce, adultery laws and double standards against foreigners is beyond me.
But to each their own.
pre-nup....problem solved...or rent dont buy.....
It's cheaper to rent than buy
What the PI government doesn't understand is that they will de-incentivize marriage like what they did in the west with no fault divorce and alimony. Why get married at that point? And a lot of people going to the phils don't, they just date perpetually. The only downside is...well, there isn't any. LOL. You could argue its harder to get a visa, but with a 3 year tourist visa, it doesn't make sense to get married for a visa.
@VENEMPASTOR Yea let me know if you hear of any American being brought to court for this. Have a feeling will be waiting awhile.
The subject I would like to hear more about is Jealousy in Filipinas... My soon-to-be Filipina wife is INSANELY jealous. Any problems we have all seem to come from that... There is no reason for her jealousy either. She admits she can't help it. It worries me.
If I may? Respectfully, these things don’t fix themselves. Many times the extent or extreme is suppressed prior to marriage. I would encourage you to get counseling somehow, maybe virtual, before committing to marriage. It’s for you as well as her. I failed marriage is a waste of precious years. Good luck and God bless you.
This is a cultural character defect that probably won’t improve with time. Many filipinas response to jealousy is to put her man in a straight jacket which is not a solution that I could ever live with.
I've done the reverse tampo thing too. Really pisses them off. They can dish it out, but they cannot take it! 😂😂😂😂
They hate it 😂
If your Filipina doesnt get your sarcasm then make her watch a few seasons of Seinfeld.
It's a great vid and I salute all of you..
But respectfully unless you're a fly on the wall or speak Cebuano fluently..
Then you're only guessing about family dynamics..
It's like watching a silent movie..
I too have met a lot of ppl , I speak the language enough to basically understand stuff... It's the everyday chatter
I told my GF that if she does tampo, i’ll just take a scuba diving trip for a couple of days. That altered 90% of her tampo:)
My wife burps out loud them say's something like " thanks god " that's irritating .
Did you tell her?
@@GiointhePhilippines yes sir but its her culture to be happy to eat well and be thankful , she's gotten better at it
Enjoy living in the Philippines guys!
Fun chat
You guys are spot on. I'm doing an LDR like Darryl and we are similar aged couples. When she askes me if I'm talking to other girls and I say no one she starts crying. She says you are really not talking to me. Then I go no baby hang on. Then i get bunch of sad emojies. Then I say I'm not talking to any girls but you lol. This kind of thing happens frequently.
Unfortunately, that can be common
live with my parents ...lol joke of the year!
When they moody on you. Gosh....
Been married 22 years..bunch of noobies 😄😄
😂😂
Cool panel-With ex Flipina living in the 🇺🇸-pro-thankful forever for what you gave her/loyalty/took care of my mom and dad/good hygiene & the Cons-send too much $ home/jealousy/gossip/rice addict daily/spam/smelly dried fish/expensive pacific islander markets-However my girls are ambitious/humanistic/studious/financially secure! They think I am crazy moving to Asia (that’s ’ how your kids or step kids will probably think if you bring them to the 🇺🇸 or born here)
Well stated!
With all due respect. Three middle aged, successful, good looking guys…and you’re ‘dealing’ with tampo??
Nope. Not even from Miss Philippines. End that. Its not cute. Its not funny later. Its childish and unnecessary.
What i want to know...Do they do Tampo to their parents....😂😂😂
When I was young, my mother never tolerated "tampo". Therefore, there is no such thing as "tampo" in our household. Another thing, supporting the extended family in the Philippine culture would most likely happen if a foreigner married into a family with no/few resources. Hence, such a woman would resort to marrying a foreigner to help the family from poverty (noble cause, I guess).
The dynamics would be different if a foreigner is fortunate enough to find an educated filipina woman from a traditional Philippine family. Chances are she'd come from a family with more than enough resources (with highly educated siblings too) to not rely on a foreign in-law and she'd be a woman who keeps traditional Filipino values (family first, taking care of the husband and kids being the top priority, etc.) even though she is more than capable of earning money in her own right.
However, such a Filipina would most likely marry a Filipino coming from the same background.
Can't stand the flipping flippa accent!!!!