One perspective that I have seen previously said and which I agree with: The IBA shouldn't release any information about those tests. Not because they have or don't have something to say about Khalif's sex, but because medical information should remain classified and not something the public has a right to see. Athletes deserve privacy too.
@@kapk1701 In the US at least, which test you've been given is considered protected medical information; not only that, but the fact that you have been tested at all is also a HIPAA issue. A lab tech can't say "Oh, I tested Joe's sample the other day!", even if they don't say what for, even if they don't say results, without making the HIPAA people big mad.
@@corvusenca Explaining what test(s) they do does not tell anyone which specific test(s) were used on any specific individual. So this does not break any confidentiality.
Except they did. They've variously claimed it was a chromosome test and then that it was a testosterone test. Also said what lab did the testing except that the lab they cited doesn't do _either_ of those tests. The reality is that if the IBA had definitive proof that Khelif was anything other than a hormonally/chromosomally typical cis woman, they'd have released that info. Regardless of privacy or ethics. As shown by the fact that they _loudly_ proclaimed she had failed and only when pressed defaulted to "Trust me bro" and finally claims that it's unethical to release that info. Because they Do. Not. Have. It. The IOC's response was much closer to what you've described. Essentially, "Khelif met all requirements for competition. We will release no further information."
My favorite comparison in this regard: someone drowning in a four meter deep lake is just as much in need of help as someone drowning in a six meter deep lake.
The only reason I compare my emotional pain with other people is to try to find out I'm not alone being this miserable. I've had mental illness for 20 years and I suffer a lot. However, whenever I see people with the same diagnoses as me I just get so disappointed and feeling hopeless, because they're much more functional than I am. I'm not saying their needs aren't important, but I seek them up to feel I'm not alone and just end up feeling even more alone and ill and no one seems to suffer like I do. It's not about comparing needs in order to only favour one, it is to feel unity. But I never feel that. I feel so alone, and it seems like no one is as ill as me. I HATE that.
Exactly. Just as much as someone drowning in a puddle a few centimeters deep. (That isn‘t unrealistic if you loose consciousness or can‘t get up for any other reason.)
@@SamirCCat Sorry to hear that. Of course I don‘t know your situation. But it doesn‘t mean that there aren‘t in a similar situation than you. Or that people sometimes or often seem more capable than they are. Or that, even of there are bigger differences, there aren‘t also similarities and people who can relate to your experiences. Wish you all the best.
@@Alina_Schmidt Thank you. I believe the other people who are as non-functional as me aren't "seen" in society, because they struggle so much. So I never meet them. We probably sit alone and think we're the only ones who are this ill, when in reality we just haven't found each other. People like me don't start and maintain a RUclips channel, because we're too ill. This means everyone I see on YT is more functional than me, OR has more help than I do. It's sad to feel different even in situations where you're "supposed" to belong. I don't think I've ever felt I relate to film- or book characters for 20 years. Stories like mine aren't told. It's sad. But thank you for your empathy.
Yup. Also extra horrible considering the fairly recent history of violence from France colonizing Algeria. The team must have already felt on edge being near a river filled with hundreds of murdered Algerians
No one who knows anything about this issue thinks Imane Khelif is trans. By contrast, several journalists, with no apparent axes to grind against her, have reported that she has a disorder of sex development that results in male-type muscle development. Either those journalists are lying, they are completely incompetent, or they are telling the truth. We have no reason to believe it's anything other than #3.
@@thewhiterabbituk Algeria, from what I've read, do not have any LGBT+ rights or pro-LGBT+ organizations. It's a very conservative Muslim country. The idea that Algeria would promote a trans athlete at all to represent them on the world stage and not immediately throw them under the bus if it created a backlash is positively ridiculous. If Imane Khelif was a transwoman, she wouldn't be representing Algeria because her home country would put in jail, regardless of her athletic ability
The argument isn’t that Khelif is “trans”, but that they are a male with a DSD. Khelif has 5-ARD, a DSD that only affects males. Failed official tests from several independent labs, the IOC were made aware of the results prior to competition but chose to ignore them. Right now, Khelif could perform a simple cheek swab test and clear everything up, yet they refuse to do so. No actual female would shy away from the opportunity to prove their sex in a situation like this.
Had a sociology professor create a list on the board. One side said Male and the other Female. She asked the class to categorize what they think are gender characteristics of each sex. Very quickly, the class broke into confusion. Almost all characteristics listed could fall into either category because yeah, people vary in body types and attributes. This opened her discussion of gender in class and for the first time I felt like my classmates understood the difference between gender and assigned sex. They also began to understand how these strict gendered roles and weird picking apart of people’s bodies and genitalia affected everyone. We had discussions too about intersex individuals and how this obsession with others bodies is invasive and not conclusive as to if someone is or isn’t trans. Cis and not cis. I’m non-binary. Cis people are the ones who receive the most “gendered” care. I have a coworker who is a cis woman who I got to talk with about being on Testosterone, because she needed to take it because her levels were low! Everyone has all the hormones! It’s about the balance of said hormones.
Your co-worker would have received a much lower dose of testosterone than a trans-man and she doesn't NEED it for good health. However she absolutely needs oestrogen for good health. Oestrogen deficiency leads to dementia, Alzheimer's, cardiovascular disease and a myriad of other less deadly health issues (including brain fog, worsening memory and anxiety). Low testosterone in women leads to low libido and lower muscle mass.
@Ta-da32 you don't know why that person specifically needed testosterone, don't speculate on other ppl's medical issues, specially when you don't have ANY information aside from her being a woman and taking testosterone for some reason
@@katt-katt2606 Hi, I do know, she’s my coworker and friend. I appreciate the care to defend her, but I do know and brought it up as an example that cis people also take hormones. I’m not speculating someone’s gender at all or their reasonings for taking hormones, I know this person and I’m trans non-binary and have also taken hormones. We’ve shared happy conversations of how it’s helped us both.
"We hate Group A soooooo much, we'd rather keep oppressing Groups B, C, & D, who we supposedly support, rather than give Group A any rights." Sounds like an exhausting hill to die on.
Yeah, it's essentially a policy of "I'd rather see 100 innocent people be punished then have one person guilty of a crime I made up in my head go free"
I feel like that's the case for a lot of Bigots. They don't care if everyone gets harmed as long as those people that they perceive as "worse/leader" suffer more than them.
The dude made an alleged truck that can't survive dust or a car wash. That's like somehow managing to make a frying pan that immediately didolves on contact with oil. It's almost impressive how bad he is at the things for which he is inexplicably renowned.
Fun fact, I was once removed from the women's bathroom in a station in Milano because a lady in the cue claimed that I was trans. I'm definitely not but I took it as a compliment and laughed it off. I'm still wondering if it was being 6ft tall or my strong jaw which 'tipped her off' but sadly since the only way to put her right would have been dropping my pants and getting arrested I chose to simply hold on until I'd left the station. Transphobia definitely has started to criminalize not having a feminine appearance!
I mean, that wouldn't have been definitive proof either, because genital surgery is a thing. If you want to proof to someone that your vagina isn't surgically constructed, you would have to let them look reaaally closely. And then there are of course also cis women with surgically constructed vaginas. Like pretty much every kind of trans healthcare, some cis people also get it.
Yep. I am trans, but this happened when I was 14, and before I knew trans people existed. I was minding my own business in a completely empty bathroom, had just finished washing my hands and was heading towards the door, when a woman accompanied by a male security guard (male is relevant) entered the bathroom. Where she immediately started shrieking that I was a man, demanding I leave, telling me men did not belong in the women's bathroom under literally any circumstance, and demanding I "prove" I wasn't a man. And by "prove" I mean **she ordered me to pull down my pants and show her my genitals!!!** 14. I was 14!! All this while she blocked the door. Like I am unable to leave if you are blocking the door. Also, why are you complaining that there is a man in here, when the only man present is the one you brought in? When I refused to pull down my pants (because obviously), she called me a ped0phile. Because apparently a child refusing to show their genitals to an adult is the ped0, not the adult demanding to see a child's genitals? Oh and the security guard? He was leaning against the door smirking at me. Why did this happen? Sweatpants. She saw someone enter a girl's bathroom (yes girls, we were in a school) wearing sweatpants and assumed they had to be a big scary man. Even though I was significantly smaller than her.
so sorry someone did that to you, but it sounds like you handled it beautifully and good for you on that! I actually once mentioned to a gender critical how their 'we can always tell' rhetoric was bound to hurt cis women too, hoping to shake her out of it, mentioning that butch lesbians have been talking about bathroom access since the 90s ... she claimed that butches were probably willing to take that sacrifice ... so yeah, some may claim to be in it to protect women, but their definition of 'womanhood' is so narrow it hurts more women than it helps - if it even helps any women, really ?
Thank you for speaking up for the Trans community as a cis lesbian. Thank you so very much. So many people don't see how helping Trans people helps LGBTQ+ folk.
Why does Rowling get to compete in Author as a man (Robert Galbrait or whatever), but a woman doesn't get to compete in women's sports according to Rowling?
Even her original penname ("J.K." rather than "Jo") was so that "boys would read the books"! She's literally been cosplaying as a dude *for her whole career* so she could make enough money to have a castle from which to pelt the peasantry with her unresolved mental/emotional issues and gross opinions
Yessss, right!? If you want to portray yourself as such a champion of women, why not publish your sexist, transphobic crime novels under a female pseudonym, JOANNE?
I spent too much energy arguing with people on social media about this. Had to point out to too many people that it's super creepy to screenshot and zoom in on someone's crotch. They get strangely quiet when you point that out
I want to clarify, Angela Carini did not quit because she thought her opponent was trans, nor was she "forced" to quit. She quit because the first punch made her nose bleed and she couldn't breathe. She quit due to fear for bodily safety. She did cry and refuse to shake her opponents hand, but it had nothing to do with her gender, she was just upset she was injured and couldn't continue. She later admitted that she had shown poor sportsmanship in refusing to shake her opponents hand, and apologized to her and to everyone, and clarified it had nothing to do with gender, and if the Olympics said she can compete she can compete. Angela Carini is being used by terfs as a scapegoat and is not at fault for anything more than poor sportsmanship.
Sure. That's what she said when she noticed the backlash. In reality none of us can know what went on in her head. But she looked like a transphobe and acted like a transphobe.
The IBA was stripped of its title due to its close links to the Russian government, in case folks are wondering. Khelif had- incidentally - beaten a russian boxer just before they transvestigated her
@@lamedumbjokerit’s ironic that I gravitated towards her book series because it felt like a welcoming place. I was very closeted, and very shy, but now I just feel sick that I put money in her pockets to fund her hate towards parts of my community.
I can't believe there are people in the comment section that are genuinely surprised that Jessica supports trans people, specifically trans athletes when it's literally backes by science that they don't have some crazy biological advantage. Anyways, thanks again Jessica for a lovely, well made video. Always a pleasure to see you upload.
Out of curiosity, what is the science that supports your statement that trans women don't have an advantage over cis women? From what I've read, even after taking hormones, a trans woman will retain the advantages afforded to her from being assigned male at birth, e.g. larger hearts, higher average muscle mass, faster. I will point out there is a difference in supporting trans people and supporting the notion of trans women in women's sport. The LGBTQ community don't share exactly the same views and it's common to disagree on some things but agree with someone's philosophy more broadly
"literally backes by science that they don't have some crazy biological advantage." not actually true statement. As depends on the sport and activity. as in its a way more complicated topic.
That's because Alt-Right people hate science. After all, they're anti-intellectual, climate deniers, transphobes, creationists, and conspiracy theorists!
So minors transitioning is because of grooming, but if you're a high performance athlete you better transition as young as possible or you're a cheater. Got it.
Yep. And if you suggest the usage of puberty blockers as a solution to sports fairness, to those same people, they cite "child abuse" anyway. Never mind that puberty blockers give people time to think about whether they want to transition or not - without having to be forced to transition when they aren't sure exactly where on the gender spectrum they fall.
Or you accept that like being too tall for ballet,or too-light a frame or too-heavy to do well in your chosen sport that it’s unfortunately not something you can do professionally until there is a category for you. Yes it’s disappointing but that’s life.
The organizations that require pre-pubertal transition in order to compete in the female category are not accusing anyone of "grooming." (It would be absurd for them to do so, since they are sports regulatory bodies with no jurisdiction to make such allegations.) It's hardly surprising that sports regulatory bodies think one way about transition and right-wing culture warriors think a different way about it! I mean really, would you expect them to think the same?
Best thing I got from therapy in high school was banishing the concept of "deserving." Deserve is not relevant, it is not useful, everyone's needs are equally valid! I don't always succeed in banishing the concept but I'm doing my best lol
when people say stupid shit like "your depression doesn't matter because there are starving people in """third world""" (they always use this phrase) countries" don't seem to understand that people in those countries also suffer depression and there are starving people in their own country
And yet NOBODY is out here talking about how white, CIS, male, Michael Phelps has a genetic disorder preventing his muscles from causing the chemical reaction with calcium telling his brain there is muscle pain from over exertion. He literally has a genetic advantage over all other swimmers, but yay hero boy. I am not asking to punish him for this. I AM asking we don’t punish others for their genetic advantage.
There's a difference between having a genetic advantage, and being born with XY chromosomes, tho i'm not sure if that's the case for Imane but it seems likely.
@@I_am_Lauren What i mean was it's different to be "special" genetically, and being born with XY chromosomes not XX. A man being taller than another man is because he has a genetic advantage. A man being taller than a woman isn't because he's a genetic anomaly, but because he's born with XY chromosomes, as a matter of fact a genetically gifted woman might still be shorter than a genetically average man.
Please let's be careful about "friend who speaks of own problem when you express yours". It's a neurodiverse feature of communication style. There are people who are actively competing for attention and then there's people who are expressing that they relate by speaking on the situations that made your struggle relatable to them. There's nuance there, actually. You will notice the difference if you express how you feel and express what needs you have in terms of communication when you speak on a problem. The ND person is likely to comply. We speak out of care and your needs matter and we're aware that our communication styles differ. While a person who is competitive is likely to be dismissive or again direct attention to themselves by framing you as harsh for bringing up your needs (given that you do so with care and not indeed harshly)
from my understanding jessica wasn't speaking bad about this kind of trait, she acknowledged that sometimes people do it to show that they understand what you're going through an as a way to find solidarity within shared experiences
I appreciate the way you explained this and acknowledged the nuances there. I am neurodivergent but it’s also how my mom communicates and I think the latter actually has a lot more to do with why I communicate by sharing my own stories to show I understand. I’ve been lucky enough to have people in my life that communicate similarly so I do not think it’s something I have to defend often but I do worry about it a lot.
Thank you for clearing that up, here also neurodivergent🙋♀️ and felt really called out😅 i know this is my way of communicating so i pay a lot of attention when speaking with other people (masking much😂)
I also communicate this way, and to be quite honest I think those of us who do should try to limit when we do it. We can communicate the same thing by just saying "I know how you feel, I had a similar experience" and then immediately circle back to supporting our friend and their problems. It's really best to ask people (when they're not actively telling us about an issue) if hearing our stories helps or not. In this example, why should it be on Jessica to adapt how she feels about her friend not supporting her in a way that helps? Why can't her friend adapt how they show their support? I know that it's not easy to switch up, but the fact is that I found out that multiple friends stopped coming to me for support because I kept making them feel like I was making it about me. They, like Jessica, understood that I wasn't trying to, they knew that it was my way of saying I understood; but it made them feel bad anyway. For my money it's our responsibility to check if people find it helpful or not, and make an effort not to do it when they say it doesn't help.
@@KxNOxUTAwhat an odd thing to say about a positive comment? Coming from a trans person, this is really weird and kinda says to me you didnt really listen to Jessica in the 33 minutes she was speaking.
Why do we fault the athletes when it is on the governing and regulatory bodies to ensure that the standards are clear and fair? If the tests are faulty, the media and public should never blame the athletes, who are really just focused on training for their sport.
The thing is... the tests aren't faulty... the system is actually pretty bad. For women as they still don't get the exact same level of support from their coaching development systems. Maybe in another few generations things will be better for them.
@@manuproulx2764, Yep... sexualized. For some, their bodies are not be able to handle the stress of the "ideal body" while also building up muscles required of them to perform at their very best... setting up the athlete for failure. Jessie Gender did a documentary style video covering this issue. It is also Age Restricted due to... suicide idealization, self-harm, etc.
Your skill at delivering educational content is unmatched. Your humour is also greatly appreciated. Thank you for your content and also just for being you :)
This was a brilliant video. I've been told countless times that as a biromantic asexual woman I don't belong in the LGBTQ+ community because I'm not oppressed, and that asexuality is a mental illness. I cannot tell you how damning and hurtful that is. Being part of the LGBTQ+ community should not be about how many oppression points you have. In this day and age, it is more important than ever to stand up and support one another as rights of so many minority groups are being stripped away.
How utterly frustrating that must be for you. Rather than not belonging, I’d argue that you belong under the queer umbrella even MORE, because of your multiple intersections here! edit: Just to be clear, I am not arguing for oppression points AT ALL, though I could see how someone might think it. Just pointing out what I see as an absurdity to that argument. I’m a big tent person, myself. Plenty of room under this queer umbrella! ☂️ 🌈
Yep. I'm trans and I've been told I don't belong in the LGBT community because I am ace (excuse me lgbT, it's right there), since I don't face oppression, bigotry or discrimination, because I "just need to be r*ped instead". Being told I don't face discrimination or bigotry by someone telling me they hope someone violently assaults me would be ironic if it wasn't so terrifying. Especially because I stopped counting after I got up to five people who've said some variant of this, because that's not a number I want to know.
Kinda strange, it's almost like they don't really care about the truth of who is or isn't trans or how these silly rules impact everyone as long as they can dehumanize a minority of people to aggregate their base around fear and disgust to serve a completely unrelated agenda....
Well the abuse of people does benefit not only the people who benefit directly, but also in the direction of abuse being concentrated away from people. Aka the Oppression Olympics also occur because survivors of abuse who have gained some degree of privilege fear to be dragged down into abuse hell. Abusers pitch the people they abuse against each other constantly, also by weaponizing the impression that they are too limited to handle "returning human rights" to more than one group at a time, so to speak. Aka "You cannot ask be to work on all my forms of bigotry at once" when it's literally only one thing: You either believe humans have rights or not. A form of weaponized incompetence. Guess what group that trope is most associated with!
Ding ding ding, you got it. They couldn't give less of a shit what parts of chromosomes or hormones anyone has, they just want to hurt and dehumanize anyone who falls outside of the extremely strict gender and racial standards they hold
"transvestigation" was not a word i knew before, and I'm just...🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻 I know that progress is like this: two steps forward; three-four back, but COME. ON. This is preposterous. No ...this is BEYOND preposterous. This is like the "Trans Scare" and JK is McCarthy. Someone needs to ask her, "Ms. Rowling, have you no decency?"
I am that friend who often responds to someone talking about their problems with referencing my own. My intent is never to diminish what they are going through. I'm trying to show that I understand and that I don't want them to feel alone (especially because I grew up feeling very isolated by my own struggles and wished I'd been able to reach out to others who get it). It's because I felt so alone in the things I was going through that I don't know how to properly communicate with others who are battling something as well. It's complicated.
Yeah. I do this too and then had a friend say that it always felt like I was competing with them. I also struggle with being a problem solver and hearing someone explain a challenge feels like an invitation for me to say something like, "Oh, have your tried x?" I try (and sometimes succeed) these days to focus more on listening versus showing support. I'm not saying that commiserating and solutions are never appropriate. But often people just want to be heard, which can be really hard to do.
@@CorwinFound It depends on the person, a friend who doesn’t have similar chronic health issues and is trying to relate their own problems as similar to yours is very isolating, you know they aren’t experiencing the same thing you are, but it sounds like they believe they are. So you continue to be a freak who nobody understands - but advice and relation from someone who has gone through similar things comes with the understanding that the other person already has been through the wringer like you, and knows their advice is more along the lines of a shot in the dark than a probable cure. Their relating is closer to a 1/1 comparison. And it empowers you, rather than making you think you’re somehow the ultimate invalid who nobody understands. You can laugh about things instead of having to explain them. Sometimes it actually can be a jumping off point to discovering a solution to a specific problem. That doesn’t typically happen with people who are not knowledgeable and experienced. Of course, there is also the case of someone just knowing you very well, and you have a mutual understanding when talking about issues. Even if you are very different from each other in terms of disability and able-bodied, you can laugh about things, instead of them feeling like they need to explain things to you. It’s empathy and compassion, and being very good friends with someone.
Yep. I mean it in a supportive way, like "I've dealt with this too and I'm sorry you are dealing with it as well", but somehow even though I usually don't share details in my reply, it still gets interpreted in a "you are making literally everything about you" way. Like no I'm not, their misinterpretation of a very straightforward sentence is not on me.
I admire your taste in fashion, especially those Formal Gowns. I wish we had more opportunities to wear them more often. I am a Trans Woman, and missed out on things like Prom, Winter Formals and the multitude of weddings.
I say, where what you want. You wanna rock a ball gown on a Tuesday, you rock a ball gown on a Tuesday. Life is too short to not get to wear what you wanna wear.
ok so playing oppression olympics is bad but what about oppression bingo - being trans, gay, ace, disabled and a trauma survivor I think I almost have a full row! Bingo!
What, no person of colour? You do have "religiously persecuted" though. The "by religion" not "for religion" one. :'3 Hugs to you, sweet bean (if you like any, that is!). Let me play with you: cis woman, demi and pan, neurospicy, ex endo patient, still who-the-heck--knows-why chronic pain patient, "trauma who? that's just my life!", immigrant (white though + as tiny kid so ppl don't know unless they spout bigoted stuff n I growl at them for it and smack them with "I'm an immigrant, too, by the way!"). Ain't life "fun" when there's not only a bazillion extra hurdles but then ppl are also normatively inept at emotion management (not suppression, processing. Thanks, sexism!) so they can't be kind and emotion vomit on your path every other step of the way like it's all about them? 😮💨 Makes you wonder why they keep framing "normal" = "happy & healthy & kind". When every single one of us has more capacity for it, with just a fraction of their resources! And ppl seem more lacking in all of that all, the less fields in oppression bingo they can tick. A single scratch below the surface and I wonder why they fight so dearly over protecting that misery model of theirs.
@@Alina_Schmidt Don't think about it too hard i guess - its just a light-hearted joke about how intersectionality can make the overlapping problems of identity feel more overwhelming together than the sum of them individuality.
I'm not ace or trans, but I have the others. I balance it out by being a biracial Indigenous Australian Jew, though (if you're wondering, the correct term is "Didgerijew".) I'm also ND. I get accused of "playing the oppression Olympics" by arseholes sometimes, though. It pisses me off.
The "separate the LGB from..." image that blows my mind the most is the one that includes not just the T and Q but also I and A. Just a bunch of cis (and almost always white) gay and bi people saying "Hey, Intersex people and Asexuals? F--k you."
Wait wait wait… chess competitions are gendered? Why on earth? (Obviously sexism, but I’d love to see someone try to rationalize that.) Edit: thanks to the people who have actually rationalized this in the replies. Turns out the answer is kind of an attempt to counter sexism, and I’ve now learned a lot about competitive chess
Because men don’t want to lose to a woman! I was on my high school chess team back forever ago. The guys on the other teams would always tell me they lost because I thought like a girl. No, they lost because I was a better player!
@@GabiAPFRight? That is what they are saying. One guy actually told me that I was cheating because I wasn’t playing how everyone else was playing. I didn’t even know what that meant.
Cis woman here, who used the men's toilet at a large event because the line was too long. Was definitely there just to pee, and didn't even look at the men in there, just went straight for the empty stall. In the 1970s. And still do it.
Ma'am, believe it or not, I have had someone straight up accuse me of making that up!! They said they couldn't believe i had to "lie about something so ridiculous". A thing that almost every woman has ever done. In the history of public restroom lines. These people have the smoothest brains and completely delusional.😂😂😂 And apparently just pee themselves when the lines are too long😂😂😂
I do this sometimes whenever I see a Broadway show. The women's bathroom lines are so damn long. If no men are in the bathroom, then I use the men's bathroom to avoid long waits
It's the other way round. It takes a bit till stuff is taken down, so it's normal to see bigotry and hate first before it gets moderated. You want to be coming into the comment section a bit later, basically. Also: algorithms will decide what of comment section you will even see. If you have ever seen many ppl complaining about terrible comments but then found no such thing, then that can be the cause. People went and compared the same comment section of the same e.g. Instagram post and turns out they looked very different based of what the algorithm thought it should show them!! It's really awful stuff! We're not even seeing the same reality when we're entering the same comment sections!!!
once again impressed by jessica's empathy and eloquence. once again frustrated by the lack of respect and critical thinking shown by fully grown human beings. good times
What people like JK Rowling seem not to understand is that cis women and men already have hormone levels which vary amongst people of different nationalities and will also be different at certain life stages (e.g. menopause). I'm a cis woman with naturally broad-ish shoulders and Mediterranean heritage, am naturally hairier than many other women in the UK, and probably have different hormone levels. The Olympics is about nurturing advantages with training, and if we control for all differences I don't really see the point in its' existence - it's these differences (including hormone levels) that allow for competitions with winners and losers. Also, what about women who develop PCOS, or men who have lower testosterone levels? What about women who have been through menopause? Intersex people exist as well, should they not be allowed to compete? Rowling's very binary worldview is starting to exclude increasing numbers of people.
Also, PCOS is a intesex condition too and it's common in females athletes (and women in general). People just never bat an eye for it because they don't think PCOS is "deviant enough to be intersex", including most gynecologists.
Yep. Like should we go back up forcing cis women onto testosterone blockers because their bodies naturally produce more than the "acceptable" levels of testosterone for a woman? (Well that's assuming it ever stopped happening)
A great example of intersectionality is Ms Marvel aka Kamala Khan. She's a Pakistani Muslim teenager who also happens to be an Inhuman and a mutant with some neurodivergent coding as well. Being a mutant is the latest new experience she has to struggle with, as mutants are "othered" in the Marvel Comics Universe, but her story so far shows that she can roll with all the punches.
I think it's also important to point out in addition to the large overlap between bi+ and trans is the fact that these communities bonded also over the fact that originally, they were both rejected by lesbian and gay activists. Bi+ centers opened their doors to trans people because they understood that pain and wanted to show that trans people had allies. Going even further back, the early trans medical research spun out of bisexuality research. Our communities are deeply intertwined for decades. It's also why I personally take great umbrage when someone tries to insist that bisexuality is transphobic. It ignores so much history and literally talks over the bi community. But that said, I really enjoyed this video. Especially the end made me really take pause. I wouldn't say I don't give myself the grace about my pain, but more that I don't give myself the grace to be as loud as I should about my accomplishments sometimes. Like I won't call my art good because I'm too aware that there are better artists out there but I'll encourage others in their art.
Sadly it took us awhile, I read about some experiences of transphobia in Bi spaces in the 90s recently which kind of shocked me considering how welcoming it was for me in the late 00s.
Your chapter on not using these kinds of comparisons to minimise your own pain really touched me. I'm very impressed at your video essay skills in general and how you connected all the dots in an engaging and interesting way and then also managed to pull at my heartstrings with that. It's always a delight to see you, even talking about such horrible topics.
Such a great video! The hair, the outfit the actual essay part!!!❤ I love that the resources you used are on the screen, but would be awesome if they were also in the description so it would be easier to look at them if I'm interested in reading more into them.
I totally get the "other people's pain doesn't invalidate YOUR pain" thing. I've always said that it's horrible that people are dying of cancer, but knowing that doesn't make my flu feel any better.
@@alexwixom4599sadly I don’t think it does. If anything I think it’s made transphobia and intersex phobia even more pronounced. It’s gonna get a lot worse for gender non-conforming cis women
I have enjoyed your content for years, and this *production* is WONDERFUL!! Love the music, the interplay, and the feedback-it really *does* help with such a heavy and depressing topic of how dehumanizing the world still is towards humans.... thank you for continuing to be a fashionable, caring, and fierce model of living-and how we can each help each other through better understanding.
29:24 "it just did not occur to me try to fix it because it was 'my pain' ... it's other people having problems that deserve to be fixed." WHY DID THAT HIT ME SO HARD? 😭😭
Yeah, like sharing about related experiences is not inherently problematic. Obviously it can be done in a rude way (I've had people compare my 7 year migraine to their hangover and imply they have it significantly worse), but a lot of people do it to show support, sympathy, [insert applicable feeling here].
This was so helpful. Must admit to a weeny bit of autistic confusion around the sharing of pain part. Am i allowed? Or am i that friend? Is my other autistic friend that friend too? We share our pain one after the other to show we get it. Am i not supposed to do this with allistic friends?
Ah, sorry about that confusion. I also pointed out that framing it this way is problematic. So let me explain what she was most liely thinking about! There is us ND ppl who genuinely care for our friends and share in their experience by retelling which of our experience made us relate to their situation. It's our way of communicating. Now some allistic people can feel like that is shifting attention from their story and feelings to our story and feelings. While as ND ppl we are more likely to perceive the overlap between both experiences. As it also communicates what aspect of the experience we can relate to. She was most likely NOT speaking about this dynamic, but it is also a mix-up that happens often and can require that we teach our allistic friends about our communication method! What allistic people usually refer to and fear, is a different situation and type of person. There are people showing narcissistic behaviour patterns and consciously manipulating patterns. They actively dismiss the experience of people around them, by building a dynamic of "competition of suffering". Rather than sharing a story on how they can relate, they are sharing a story on how they are more pitiful than the first story teller. Thereby implying that they should have all compassion and support before anybody else does, as they have it worse. It can be labeled as "attention seeking" (but people will also abuse this label to sometimes diminish people's valid complaints about a problem). So, she was using the later dynamic, to describe how different oppressed groups can engage in competition with each other for resources, when the limitation of the resources is an illusion upheld by people in power. In psychology, there's a concept of "scapegoat" when it comes to family dynamics. There's an abuser and the abused rest of the family. And the "scapegoat" of the family is the member of the family who gets "sacrificed" by the other abused family members, since they can escape abuse by siding with the abuser in the abuse of the "scapegoat" family member. Said family members will use tactics like framing themselves as more deserving of the abuser's positive attention than the "scapegoat" family member. Societally, we have seen concentration on disabled, then women, then gay people and now trans people being put at the centre of abuse, with sometimes people from the societally already slightly more accepted groups framing themselves as more deserving of resources and support than them.
When I saw a headline about the trans athlete I felt so disappointed with the world yet again. I mean even the audacity to write some "shocking" headlines is already so rude. It is no one's business! Sexism and all around rudeness towards individual athletes over gender rules have always been one big reason why I hate to watch sports...I mean what was that rule over Norwegian women beach volleyball team where they couldn't wear the uniforms they wanted back in 2021!!! (Of course sometimes there are understandable rules but not that time)
I'm a bisexual woman who happens to be married to a man. Doesn't make me less bi. But it makes me feels less welcomed in LGBTQ+ spaces. As I pass as straight, I was called names and I don't go to Pride anymore. Which is a shame because I would have loved to take my husband to show him my community... that doesn't want me anymore because I love who I happens to love !
Sadly a lot of queer spaces are heavily discriminatory. I've had people tell me I don't belong at pride and I'm just appropriating queer people... I'm a non-binary trans demiguy, aroace, and in a queer platonic relationship with a trans woman. But somehow I'm just a straight person appropriating ally culture? Like how would straight work if I'm non-binary? Like let's see lgbTQiA, yep, I'm totally appropriating my own culture. 🤦
I love how every video related to Imane Khalif and the bigotry she's faced that I've seen so far approaches the subject from a different angle. There is so much excellent discussion going on right now, it just shows how one situation can be a springboard for a whole variety of discourse. And yeah, just goes to show how important intersectionality is!
I actually once counselled a bisexual woman to advocate on behalf of herself. She said she didn't because she figured other groups needed support more, but I asked her to consider that by advocating for herself, she also makes space for people who are trans and bisexual to be themselves. Advocating for any group helps all of us in the end, and advocating for your own rights is important. In fact, you are important. You shouldn't put your own needs aside just because others need help more. Help out if you can, and push with everyone else when the moment comes that someone else needs YOUR support, but don't give up your own fight. It matters too. And heck, the rest of us will probably try to help when your moment comes.
my husband plays chess competitively with a chess club in the country we live in, and he has competed against many women (some might've been trans, he didn't care), because CHESS IS CO-ED!!!! hahahahahahahah, so when he heard about the trans ban in chess (not in the country we live in, thank gawd, lol), he said it was joked about (as being the stupidest thing ever) and leaving his chess club dismayed, lol, by the way, the captain of my husband's club is a woman, lol, if she was trans, no one in the club would care.
My partner used to play in chess tournaments as a child and his teacher was a woman and he also played against girls and boys as well. It was all about skill level not sex or gender because in the end skill is the only thing that matters in chess. The only advantage my partner has over me in that game is that he actually learned it and I'm just scraping by with half learned stuff I picked up over the years. That's not because I was assigned female at birth though
The pillow story 🥲 So relatable. Also I figured out that if I put my mattress back on the bed after airing it out in a particular direction I'll have pains. For some odd reason it looks the same on both ends but turning it one way will hurt whereas the other it won't! It's such a puzzling thing! And with chronic pains, you often just cannot even tell the cause may not be "the usual stuff"
29:23 “It just didn’t occur to me to try and fix it because it was my pain, and it feels like that’s not what needs fixing” This part made me a bit weepy
29:58 … Bless you for bringing Comparative Suffering up! I first was introduced to the Psychological concept by Brené Brown. I’d totally blanked on the terms as it’d been several years since I last discussed it. And it most certainly contributes to those who resist Intersectionality in Socio-Political spheres. Thank you so much. 🙏💖✨
This is one of your best videos, covering the topic in such an indepth manner. Bravo for taking this on, interweaving the political and personal seamlessly. 👏 😊
I was in Quebec City, Canada, a little while ago, and a lot of the bathrooms were unisex. Not the single room with one toilet and a locked door kind. The “typical” one room with multiple stalls and wall of sinks, kind. The main door was left open, if there was a main door, and ppl just walked into stalls, did their thing, came out, washed their hands, and left. It was kinda amusing when men would be all huffy that there was “only one bathroom!?” and they had to wait, but no women expressed discomfort or fear
Ugh, I saw an adult throw a complete freaking temper tantrum over unisex bathrooms. In this case it was a row of single use bathrooms that each had a toilet, sink and mirror (a few were larger, and a few had baby changing tables, all clearly marked) right off the side of a hallway in a restaurant. The manager ended up having to get involved because she kept demanding to know where the women's bathroom was because she absolutely refused to let her daughter use the same bathroom as a man. Yeah, I don't think her daughter knew the difference between men and Mars because this baby was six months old at most.
Thanks for the introduction to this term. I always heard of it happening In femenist movements but only understood it as a clash of intersectonality. I struggle understanding identity, but the way you explained it definitely opened a new window for me. I believe evil is self-defeating. The more they try to spread hate, the more people they alienate. Not to say we shouldn't fight back, but it's that little belief that prevents me from giving up.
25:00 I am Russian lesbian. I know that it is out of topic, but I want to share my story. So I left Russia a year and a half ago, but i still visit it a lot. So this summer while visiting Russia, I was protesting, even though it’s literally deadly dangerous. I was sticking LGBT support fliers to the buildings, wearing LGBT support badges, and just screaming some stuff out on the street. I know it sound like nothing, but that’s all I could do as a 13 year old girl. The thing is that in that age, if I get caught my parents would get in jail. When I turn 14 it’s already me who is going to jail, so I can do more stuff. It does sound like an excuse, but you can just google cases when kids were put in jail for posting videos that support LGBT, Ukraine, or anything else that our government doesn’t.
Not me, immediately proving that knee-jerk reaction of "great, all of the other groups are being talked about..." before asexual was mentioned 😂 Great video as always.
I'll need to listen to the last part about deserving to take care of ourselves, that our pain isn't irrelevant because other's is bigger. I need to get that in my brain. I know even when I was in the hospital for my depression, I repeated I felt like I was stealing the place of someone who needed it more than me. It's easier to give that grace to others than to myself.
Absolutely and thoroughly unrelated to the topic of the video but I absolutely love that in your red outfit youre wearing both necklaces and a brooch because I always feel slightlybself conscious about styling that way since so many people seem to think jewelry should be minimal. Sometimes your necklaces and pins play off each other so nicely.
This one made me cry Jessica but in the best of ways. I am lesbian, transgender, transitioning whom is also riddled with chronic pain that likes to evolve and shift often thanks to severe CPTSD experiences. During the Olympics, I cheered that Algerian boxer on as she was being herself and proud to represent her country. Thank goodness she received gold! and she was defended. She was attacked by cruel cisgender people for being at first trans and when it was broadcast and proven she was cis, a "relief" came out. That immediately invalidated trans women who were treated like second-class citizens. There were so many women in my community that felt gut punched by that sentiment - thank goodness she's cisgender female, not trans after all. Somehow that was okay. Everything else discussed about oppression, intersectionalism, being shamed for your disability not being considered as severe as others etc etc? By my goddess Jessica you touched on everything that just strikes me in the darkest areas of my feels! I have followed your videos for years and get such inspiration from almost each and every one and always education from every single one. This one I wish was shown to high school kids in about grade 10 so that they could work on being better people before they stepped out into the adult world. I've shared this with so many of my friends. Thank you for putting such an eloquent and exacting voice to these issues in this video. I needed to hear all of these things so badly tonight. You helped me feel it was okay to be myself and that yes, so many are so wrong about how they discuss the related subjects whether purposefully or inadvertently, leading to judging others based on their gender, sexual preference, disability etc etc etc. Thank you for being you. You are always so honest and forthright. I draw a lot of confidence and inspiration from how you and Claudia present yourselves. You two are by far my favorite couple in this world when it comes to honest love and I delight in seeing how you both love each other so honestly and simply. I love seeing love. I don't know why it is so hard for people just to want to love and be loved. I see that in both of you. I wanted to take the opportunity to express how I feel when I see you two. I hope Elon stops being a billionaire out of this too. I hope the transgender mascot of the IKEA Blahaj tells the orcas to tip over JKs super yacht. I hope Logan Paul loses his shirt and is never able to do business again. There has been cheering in the trans women circles about how silent JK Rowling has been since the lawsuit was launched. The deafening silence from her lack of posting hate in her socials has been a wonderful relief. Please be of peace, know you are loved truly by many and that you are honestly one of the best examples of humanity the world has to offer. Bumps and all. Please take care of that wonderful little boy and that amazing wife of yours. - Tasha from Canada.
Thank you for saying plainly and clearly that racism is one of the main reasons that people are claiming Imane Khalif is a "man". She looks the way she does because she's Algerian and a boxer, not because she's hiding some great big gender secret. But people expect all women to fit a white western beauty standard, so since she doesn't fit that she's getting transvestigated.
Such a good video. Thank you for covering this topic (these topics, I should say!). Your channel is so informative and your empathy is so refreshing in the current divisive environment. Cheering you on. Many thanks.
Yes! It's the research. It's the presentation and my desire to be respectful but I keep focusing on the vintage fashion, hair and makeup loveliness of the presenter and the patter plus sass delivery. Love! Keep up the good work! I am one of those "g" in lgbtqia that respect all of the other letters and want us to stay together. My safety has been improved because I am bald and old and have become less visible. Safety through aging.
someone found an old tweet of rowling from a few years back where she proudly stated that she was willing to go to jail for her beliefs, sure hope she won't attempt any takebacksies now that she's brought to court for them :p
One perspective that I have seen previously said and which I agree with:
The IBA shouldn't release any information about those tests. Not because they have or don't have something to say about Khalif's sex, but because medical information should remain classified and not something the public has a right to see. Athletes deserve privacy too.
Sorry but you don't need to release the results of a test to explain what you are testing.
@@kapk1701 In the US at least, which test you've been given is considered protected medical information; not only that, but the fact that you have been tested at all is also a HIPAA issue. A lab tech can't say "Oh, I tested Joe's sample the other day!", even if they don't say what for, even if they don't say results, without making the HIPAA people big mad.
@@corvusenca Explaining what test(s) they do does not tell anyone which specific test(s) were used on any specific individual. So this does not break any confidentiality.
The IBA won't release the results of the tests because the tests were fictional in the first place.
Except they did. They've variously claimed it was a chromosome test and then that it was a testosterone test. Also said what lab did the testing except that the lab they cited doesn't do _either_ of those tests.
The reality is that if the IBA had definitive proof that Khelif was anything other than a hormonally/chromosomally typical cis woman, they'd have released that info. Regardless of privacy or ethics. As shown by the fact that they _loudly_ proclaimed she had failed and only when pressed defaulted to "Trust me bro" and finally claims that it's unethical to release that info. Because they Do. Not. Have. It.
The IOC's response was much closer to what you've described. Essentially, "Khelif met all requirements for competition. We will release no further information."
My favorite comparison in this regard: someone drowning in a four meter deep lake is just as much in need of help as someone drowning in a six meter deep lake.
The only reason I compare my emotional pain with other people is to try to find out I'm not alone being this miserable. I've had mental illness for 20 years and I suffer a lot. However, whenever I see people with the same diagnoses as me I just get so disappointed and feeling hopeless, because they're much more functional than I am. I'm not saying their needs aren't important, but I seek them up to feel I'm not alone and just end up feeling even more alone and ill and no one seems to suffer like I do. It's not about comparing needs in order to only favour one, it is to feel unity. But I never feel that. I feel so alone, and it seems like no one is as ill as me. I HATE that.
Exactly. Just as much as someone drowning in a puddle a few centimeters deep. (That isn‘t unrealistic if you loose consciousness or can‘t get up for any other reason.)
@@SamirCCat Sorry to hear that. Of course I don‘t know your situation. But it doesn‘t mean that there aren‘t in a similar situation than you. Or that people sometimes or often seem more capable than they are. Or that, even of there are bigger differences, there aren‘t also similarities and people who can relate to your experiences.
Wish you all the best.
@@Alina_Schmidt Thank you. I believe the other people who are as non-functional as me aren't "seen" in society, because they struggle so much. So I never meet them. We probably sit alone and think we're the only ones who are this ill, when in reality we just haven't found each other. People like me don't start and maintain a RUclips channel, because we're too ill. This means everyone I see on YT is more functional than me, OR has more help than I do. It's sad to feel different even in situations where you're "supposed" to belong. I don't think I've ever felt I relate to film- or book characters for 20 years. Stories like mine aren't told. It's sad. But thank you for your empathy.
Love this
Also the idea that Algeria would send a trans athlete to the olympics is ridiculous considering that being trans is illegal there.
Yup. Also extra horrible considering the fairly recent history of violence from France colonizing Algeria. The team must have already felt on edge being near a river filled with hundreds of murdered Algerians
@@thewhiterabbitukno it is illegal
No one who knows anything about this issue thinks Imane Khelif is trans.
By contrast, several journalists, with no apparent axes to grind against her, have reported that she has a disorder of sex development that results in male-type muscle development. Either those journalists are lying, they are completely incompetent, or they are telling the truth. We have no reason to believe it's anything other than #3.
@@thewhiterabbituk Algeria, from what I've read, do not have any LGBT+ rights or pro-LGBT+ organizations. It's a very conservative Muslim country. The idea that Algeria would promote a trans athlete at all to represent them on the world stage and not immediately throw them under the bus if it created a backlash is positively ridiculous. If Imane Khelif was a transwoman, she wouldn't be representing Algeria because her home country would put in jail, regardless of her athletic ability
The argument isn’t that Khelif is “trans”, but that they are a male with a DSD.
Khelif has 5-ARD, a DSD that only affects males. Failed official tests from several independent labs, the IOC were made aware of the results prior to competition but chose to ignore them.
Right now, Khelif could perform a simple cheek swab test and clear everything up, yet they refuse to do so. No actual female would shy away from the opportunity to prove their sex in a situation like this.
Had a sociology professor create a list on the board. One side said Male and the other Female. She asked the class to categorize what they think are gender characteristics of each sex. Very quickly, the class broke into confusion. Almost all characteristics listed could fall into either category because yeah, people vary in body types and attributes. This opened her discussion of gender in class and for the first time I felt like my classmates understood the difference between gender and assigned sex. They also began to understand how these strict gendered roles and weird picking apart of people’s bodies and genitalia affected everyone. We had discussions too about intersex individuals and how this obsession with others bodies is invasive and not conclusive as to if someone is or isn’t trans. Cis and not cis. I’m non-binary. Cis people are the ones who receive the most “gendered” care. I have a coworker who is a cis woman who I got to talk with about being on Testosterone, because she needed to take it because her levels were low! Everyone has all the hormones! It’s about the balance of said hormones.
Your co-worker would have received a much lower dose of testosterone than a trans-man and she doesn't NEED it for good health. However she absolutely needs oestrogen for good health. Oestrogen deficiency leads to dementia, Alzheimer's, cardiovascular disease and a myriad of other less deadly health issues (including brain fog, worsening memory and anxiety). Low testosterone in women leads to low libido and lower muscle mass.
@@Ta-da32 Just say you're a misogynist next time.
@Ta-da32 you don't know why that person specifically needed testosterone, don't speculate on other ppl's medical issues, specially when you don't have ANY information aside from her being a woman and taking testosterone for some reason
@@katt-katt2606 Hi, I do know, she’s my coworker and friend. I appreciate the care to defend her, but I do know and brought it up as an example that cis people also take hormones. I’m not speculating someone’s gender at all or their reasonings for taking hormones, I know this person and I’m trans non-binary and have also taken hormones. We’ve shared happy conversations of how it’s helped us both.
@@katt-katt2606 so sorry I see now you were replying to the person above. Yes, thank you!
"We hate Group A soooooo much, we'd rather keep oppressing Groups B, C, & D, who we supposedly support, rather than give Group A any rights." Sounds like an exhausting hill to die on.
It all reminds me of The Sneetches. Everyone is being bamboozled by the man!
Yeah, it's essentially a policy of "I'd rather see 100 innocent people be punished then have one person guilty of a crime I made up in my head go free"
Republicans = sneetches
Yep. You will always do more good by helping the people who need it, than hurting the people you think deserve it.
I feel like that's the case for a lot of Bigots. They don't care if everyone gets harmed as long as those people that they perceive as "worse/leader" suffer more than them.
Why anybody thinks Elon should be listened to is beyond me.
Indeed. He's a Stinky Twit, nothing more.
The dude made an alleged truck that can't survive dust or a car wash. That's like somehow managing to make a frying pan that immediately didolves on contact with oil. It's almost impressive how bad he is at the things for which he is inexplicably renowned.
He's rich. And rockets are cool. That's enough for most muskrats
It's nice to see someone saying what I'm thinking, as opposed to people who are so far up his a** they're gonna beat SpaceX into orbit.
Elon stans are just the worst, if you ask me.
Fun fact, I was once removed from the women's bathroom in a station in Milano because a lady in the cue claimed that I was trans. I'm definitely not but I took it as a compliment and laughed it off. I'm still wondering if it was being 6ft tall or my strong jaw which 'tipped her off' but sadly since the only way to put her right would have been dropping my pants and getting arrested I chose to simply hold on until I'd left the station. Transphobia definitely has started to criminalize not having a feminine appearance!
I mean, that wouldn't have been definitive proof either, because genital surgery is a thing. If you want to proof to someone that your vagina isn't surgically constructed, you would have to let them look reaaally closely. And then there are of course also cis women with surgically constructed vaginas. Like pretty much every kind of trans healthcare, some cis people also get it.
Yep. I am trans, but this happened when I was 14, and before I knew trans people existed. I was minding my own business in a completely empty bathroom, had just finished washing my hands and was heading towards the door, when a woman accompanied by a male security guard (male is relevant) entered the bathroom. Where she immediately started shrieking that I was a man, demanding I leave, telling me men did not belong in the women's bathroom under literally any circumstance, and demanding I "prove" I wasn't a man. And by "prove" I mean **she ordered me to pull down my pants and show her my genitals!!!** 14. I was 14!! All this while she blocked the door. Like I am unable to leave if you are blocking the door. Also, why are you complaining that there is a man in here, when the only man present is the one you brought in? When I refused to pull down my pants (because obviously), she called me a ped0phile. Because apparently a child refusing to show their genitals to an adult is the ped0, not the adult demanding to see a child's genitals? Oh and the security guard? He was leaning against the door smirking at me.
Why did this happen? Sweatpants. She saw someone enter a girl's bathroom (yes girls, we were in a school) wearing sweatpants and assumed they had to be a big scary man. Even though I was significantly smaller than her.
@@HelenHenninger What has that got to do with men punching women?
so sorry someone did that to you, but it sounds like you handled it beautifully and good for you on that!
I actually once mentioned to a gender critical how their 'we can always tell' rhetoric was bound to hurt cis women too, hoping to shake her out of it, mentioning that butch lesbians have been talking about bathroom access since the 90s ... she claimed that butches were probably willing to take that sacrifice ... so yeah, some may claim to be in it to protect women, but their definition of 'womanhood' is so narrow it hurts more women than it helps - if it even helps any women, really ?
@@denblakat9243 damn, she really went "I'm ok with preventing butch lesbians from using the women's bathroom in order to protect women's spaces"
Thank you for speaking up for the Trans community as a cis lesbian. Thank you so very much. So many people don't see how helping Trans people helps LGBTQ+ folk.
Why does Rowling get to compete in Author as a man (Robert Galbrait or whatever), but a woman doesn't get to compete in women's sports according to Rowling?
👏👏👏👏👏
Even her original penname ("J.K." rather than "Jo") was so that "boys would read the books"! She's literally been cosplaying as a dude *for her whole career* so she could make enough money to have a castle from which to pelt the peasantry with her unresolved mental/emotional issues and gross opinions
Reminder that her pen name Robert Galbraith was taken from an infamous pioneer of gay torture therapy (often erroneously labeled "conversion therapy")
Yessss, right!? If you want to portray yourself as such a champion of women, why not publish your sexist, transphobic crime novels under a female pseudonym, JOANNE?
JKR invented Quidditch where men and women play the sport on the same team. Somebody should remind her
I spent too much energy arguing with people on social media about this. Had to point out to too many people that it's super creepy to screenshot and zoom in on someone's crotch. They get strangely quiet when you point that out
😂
Wait til they learn that pads can make that area look bigger. 😂especially the large ones for heavy flow or night time.
@@GreenGiant96 What's even worse is a man fighting a woman.
I remember when the "she has a dick" thing was happening for Lady Gaga too. These people never change.
I was sexually abused by a doctor in highschool because someone said I was a man when I was a biological woman so I had to be "checked". For swim team
I am so sorry that happened to you.
That's horrible
That's terrible. I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry to hear that
I'm so sorry!
I want to clarify, Angela Carini did not quit because she thought her opponent was trans, nor was she "forced" to quit. She quit because the first punch made her nose bleed and she couldn't breathe. She quit due to fear for bodily safety. She did cry and refuse to shake her opponents hand, but it had nothing to do with her gender, she was just upset she was injured and couldn't continue. She later admitted that she had shown poor sportsmanship in refusing to shake her opponents hand, and apologized to her and to everyone, and clarified it had nothing to do with gender, and if the Olympics said she can compete she can compete. Angela Carini is being used by terfs as a scapegoat and is not at fault for anything more than poor sportsmanship.
this makes sense if you ignore her tweets, the fact she was paid half a million by russia immidelty afterwards, and made unproven claims.
Sure. That's what she said when she noticed the backlash. In reality none of us can know what went on in her head. But she looked like a transphobe and acted like a transphobe.
imane khelif herself talked about the situation and said carini knew her well and was probably taking advantage of this situation to gain clout
Daily reminder that Carini is a cop
@@JuliETrevA No she's not.
The IBA was stripped of its title due to its close links to the Russian government, in case folks are wondering. Khelif had- incidentally - beaten a russian boxer just before they transvestigated her
IBA is a russian proxy.
and there was a lot of money depending on said boxer's official undefeated record standing, as it turns out.
Weird! Not conspicuous at all. /s
@@klisterklister2367 One of those wacky coincidences that seem to happen around incidentally corrupt organisations, no doubt!
Every time some crazy missinfo scandal gets linked to Russia or Russian politics I am barley surprised at this point 😭
JK Rowling in any discussion is just disheartening. One of the greatest disappointments from my teenage years.
I swear, if she just kept away from social media I think she would have been remembered as a great author, nothing more.
@@lamedumbjokerit’s ironic that I gravitated towards her book series because it felt like a welcoming place. I was very closeted, and very shy, but now I just feel sick that I put money in her pockets to fund her hate towards parts of my community.
Greatest disappointment in an entire generation IMO
Read Skullduggery Pleasent instead. Far better YA magic girl grows up and learns stuff.
@@lamedumbjoker
It sucks, because her actions can really overwhelm any good in the books themselves
I can't believe there are people in the comment section that are genuinely surprised that Jessica supports trans people, specifically trans athletes when it's literally backes by science that they don't have some crazy biological advantage.
Anyways, thanks again Jessica for a lovely, well made video. Always a pleasure to see you upload.
Right? Like are they new here?
Out of curiosity, what is the science that supports your statement that trans women don't have an advantage over cis women? From what I've read, even after taking hormones, a trans woman will retain the advantages afforded to her from being assigned male at birth, e.g. larger hearts, higher average muscle mass, faster. I will point out there is a difference in supporting trans people and supporting the notion of trans women in women's sport. The LGBTQ community don't share exactly the same views and it's common to disagree on some things but agree with someone's philosophy more broadly
Yuuup. Jessica who is friends with trans people is NOT transphobic?? Shocking
"literally backes by science that they don't have some crazy biological advantage." not actually true statement. As depends on the sport and activity. as in its a way more complicated topic.
That's because Alt-Right people hate science. After all, they're anti-intellectual, climate deniers, transphobes, creationists, and conspiracy theorists!
So minors transitioning is because of grooming, but if you're a high performance athlete you better transition as young as possible or you're a cheater. Got it.
Yep. And if you suggest the usage of puberty blockers as a solution to sports fairness, to those same people, they cite "child abuse" anyway. Never mind that puberty blockers give people time to think about whether they want to transition or not - without having to be forced to transition when they aren't sure exactly where on the gender spectrum they fall.
Kinda like they just don't want trans people to exist....oops did i say the quiet part out loud?
It's deliberately made to be no-win.
Or you accept that like being too tall for ballet,or too-light a frame or too-heavy to do well in your chosen sport that it’s unfortunately not something you can do professionally until there is a category for you.
Yes it’s disappointing but that’s life.
The organizations that require pre-pubertal transition in order to compete in the female category are not accusing anyone of "grooming." (It would be absurd for them to do so, since they are sports regulatory bodies with no jurisdiction to make such allegations.)
It's hardly surprising that sports regulatory bodies think one way about transition and right-wing culture warriors think a different way about it! I mean really, would you expect them to think the same?
Jessica you literally made me cry when you got to the talk about comparing pain. I think I needed that, our brains can be so mean. 💜💜💜
❤
Best thing I got from therapy in high school was banishing the concept of "deserving." Deserve is not relevant, it is not useful, everyone's needs are equally valid! I don't always succeed in banishing the concept but I'm doing my best lol
when people say stupid shit like "your depression doesn't matter because there are starving people in """third world""" (they always use this phrase) countries" don't seem to understand that people in those countries also suffer depression and there are starving people in their own country
Please stop calling us "the third world". We are the developing world. As an African I find your words extremely offensive.
@@TheCatLady65 i was quoting people. that's what they say. i know it's offensive.
Yep. It's either "third world" or just "Africa". As if all of Africa is just one big monolith or something.
And yet NOBODY is out here talking about how white, CIS, male, Michael Phelps has a genetic disorder preventing his muscles from causing the chemical reaction with calcium telling his brain there is muscle pain from over exertion. He literally has a genetic advantage over all other swimmers, but yay hero boy.
I am not asking to punish him for this. I AM asking we don’t punish others for their genetic advantage.
There's a difference between having a genetic advantage, and being born with XY chromosomes, tho i'm not sure if that's the case for Imane but it seems likely.
@@dratini4036 Re-read your comment very carefully.
@@dratini4036You just described a genetic advantage.
@@dratini4036.... what do you think a chromosome is, genuinely?
@@I_am_Lauren What i mean was it's different to be "special" genetically, and being born with XY chromosomes not XX.
A man being taller than another man is because he has a genetic advantage. A man being taller than a woman isn't because he's a genetic anomaly, but because he's born with XY chromosomes, as a matter of fact a genetically gifted woman might still be shorter than a genetically average man.
Please let's be careful about "friend who speaks of own problem when you express yours". It's a neurodiverse feature of communication style. There are people who are actively competing for attention and then there's people who are expressing that they relate by speaking on the situations that made your struggle relatable to them. There's nuance there, actually.
You will notice the difference if you express how you feel and express what needs you have in terms of communication when you speak on a problem. The ND person is likely to comply. We speak out of care and your needs matter and we're aware that our communication styles differ. While a person who is competitive is likely to be dismissive or again direct attention to themselves by framing you as harsh for bringing up your needs (given that you do so with care and not indeed harshly)
from my understanding jessica wasn't speaking bad about this kind of trait, she acknowledged that sometimes people do it to show that they understand what you're going through an as a way to find solidarity within shared experiences
I appreciate the way you explained this and acknowledged the nuances there. I am neurodivergent but it’s also how my mom communicates and I think the latter actually has a lot more to do with why I communicate by sharing my own stories to show I understand. I’ve been lucky enough to have people in my life that communicate similarly so I do not think it’s something I have to defend often but I do worry about it a lot.
Thank you for clearing that up, here also neurodivergent🙋♀️ and felt really called out😅 i know this is my way of communicating so i pay a lot of attention when speaking with other people (masking much😂)
I also communicate this way, and to be quite honest I think those of us who do should try to limit when we do it. We can communicate the same thing by just saying "I know how you feel, I had a similar experience" and then immediately circle back to supporting our friend and their problems. It's really best to ask people (when they're not actively telling us about an issue) if hearing our stories helps or not. In this example, why should it be on Jessica to adapt how she feels about her friend not supporting her in a way that helps? Why can't her friend adapt how they show their support?
I know that it's not easy to switch up, but the fact is that I found out that multiple friends stopped coming to me for support because I kept making them feel like I was making it about me. They, like Jessica, understood that I wasn't trying to, they knew that it was my way of saying I understood; but it made them feel bad anyway. For my money it's our responsibility to check if people find it helpful or not, and make an effort not to do it when they say it doesn't help.
I do it a lot (Asperger's + ADHD), and only recently learned it's badly perceived >~
I wish all trans persons much success in the fight for transparency, honesty and righteousness.
I do not think we should "wish them success". We should actively partake in making it possible!
@@KxNOxUTA based ally
@@KxNOxUTAwhat an odd thing to say about a positive comment? Coming from a trans person, this is really weird and kinda says to me you didnt really listen to Jessica in the 33 minutes she was speaking.
I am so glad Jessica did this video. She said the things that people need to hear.
(And how was she not using an old timey microphone sooner??)
Maybe she might not have seen it as old timey mike but as the sports commentator mike and that's why it's used in this video?
@@louise102ndcould be.
Why do we fault the athletes when it is on the governing and regulatory bodies to ensure that the standards are clear and fair?
If the tests are faulty, the media and public should never blame the athletes, who are really just focused on training for their sport.
For some reason, blaming "the system" is just BEYOND countless people's capabilities.
The thing is... the tests aren't faulty... the system is actually pretty bad. For women as they still don't get the exact same level of support from their coaching development systems. Maybe in another few generations things will be better for them.
@@aralornwolf3140 And they are forced to dress in very revealing outfits (which shown sexism since the male athletes don't have to dress like that).
@@manuproulx2764,
Yep... sexualized. For some, their bodies are not be able to handle the stress of the "ideal body" while also building up muscles required of them to perform at their very best... setting up the athlete for failure.
Jessie Gender did a documentary style video covering this issue. It is also Age Restricted due to... suicide idealization, self-harm, etc.
Good for her. I'm glad Khelif is suing. Some people need to learn about consequences.
Your skill at delivering educational content is unmatched. Your humour is also greatly appreciated. Thank you for your content and also just for being you :)
So much work to research, write, act out, all the different angles
This was a brilliant video. I've been told countless times that as a biromantic asexual woman I don't belong in the LGBTQ+ community because I'm not oppressed, and that asexuality is a mental illness. I cannot tell you how damning and hurtful that is. Being part of the LGBTQ+ community should not be about how many oppression points you have. In this day and age, it is more important than ever to stand up and support one another as rights of so many minority groups are being stripped away.
💜🖤🤍
❤️💜💙
How utterly frustrating that must be for you. Rather than not belonging, I’d argue that you belong under the queer umbrella even MORE, because of your multiple intersections here!
edit: Just to be clear, I am not arguing for oppression points AT ALL, though I could see how someone might think it. Just pointing out what I see as an absurdity to that argument. I’m a big tent person, myself. Plenty of room under this queer umbrella! ☂️ 🌈
Yep. I'm trans and I've been told I don't belong in the LGBT community because I am ace (excuse me lgbT, it's right there), since I don't face oppression, bigotry or discrimination, because I "just need to be r*ped instead". Being told I don't face discrimination or bigotry by someone telling me they hope someone violently assaults me would be ironic if it wasn't so terrifying. Especially because I stopped counting after I got up to five people who've said some variant of this, because that's not a number I want to know.
Kinda strange, it's almost like they don't really care about the truth of who is or isn't trans or how these silly rules impact everyone as long as they can dehumanize a minority of people to aggregate their base around fear and disgust to serve a completely unrelated agenda....
Well the abuse of people does benefit not only the people who benefit directly, but also in the direction of abuse being concentrated away from people. Aka the Oppression Olympics also occur because survivors of abuse who have gained some degree of privilege fear to be dragged down into abuse hell. Abusers pitch the people they abuse against each other constantly, also by weaponizing the impression that they are too limited to handle "returning human rights" to more than one group at a time, so to speak. Aka "You cannot ask be to work on all my forms of bigotry at once" when it's literally only one thing: You either believe humans have rights or not.
A form of weaponized incompetence. Guess what group that trope is most associated with!
Ding ding ding, you got it. They couldn't give less of a shit what parts of chromosomes or hormones anyone has, they just want to hurt and dehumanize anyone who falls outside of the extremely strict gender and racial standards they hold
"transvestigation" was not a word i knew before, and I'm just...🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻 I know that progress is like this: two steps forward; three-four back, but COME. ON. This is preposterous. No ...this is BEYOND preposterous. This is like the "Trans Scare" and JK is McCarthy. Someone needs to ask her, "Ms. Rowling, have you no decency?"
I am that friend who often responds to someone talking about their problems with referencing my own. My intent is never to diminish what they are going through. I'm trying to show that I understand and that I don't want them to feel alone (especially because I grew up feeling very isolated by my own struggles and wished I'd been able to reach out to others who get it). It's because I felt so alone in the things I was going through that I don't know how to properly communicate with others who are battling something as well. It's complicated.
Yeah. I do this too and then had a friend say that it always felt like I was competing with them. I also struggle with being a problem solver and hearing someone explain a challenge feels like an invitation for me to say something like, "Oh, have your tried x?"
I try (and sometimes succeed) these days to focus more on listening versus showing support. I'm not saying that commiserating and solutions are never appropriate. But often people just want to be heard, which can be really hard to do.
That way of relating is very common with people who are autistic or ADHD.
@@lindsayosterhoff2459 me too! And I appreciate my friend who makes me feel less alone by doing this too
@@CorwinFound It depends on the person, a friend who doesn’t have similar chronic health issues and is trying to relate their own problems as similar to yours is very isolating, you know they aren’t experiencing the same thing you are, but it sounds like they believe they are. So you continue to be a freak who nobody understands - but advice and relation from someone who has gone through similar things comes with the understanding that the other person already has been through the wringer like you, and knows their advice is more along the lines of a shot in the dark than a probable cure. Their relating is closer to a 1/1 comparison. And it empowers you, rather than making you think you’re somehow the ultimate invalid who nobody understands. You can laugh about things instead of having to explain them. Sometimes it actually can be a jumping off point to discovering a solution to a specific problem. That doesn’t typically happen with people who are not knowledgeable and experienced.
Of course, there is also the case of someone just knowing you very well, and you have a mutual understanding when talking about issues. Even if you are very different from each other in terms of disability and able-bodied, you can laugh about things, instead of them feeling like they need to explain things to you. It’s empathy and compassion, and being very good friends with someone.
Yep. I mean it in a supportive way, like "I've dealt with this too and I'm sorry you are dealing with it as well", but somehow even though I usually don't share details in my reply, it still gets interpreted in a "you are making literally everything about you" way. Like no I'm not, their misinterpretation of a very straightforward sentence is not on me.
Thank you Jessica 💕 I'm just waiting for R0wling to release her own chromosome test results - my prediction? 50% mould, 50% pure hatred
I admire your taste in fashion, especially those Formal Gowns. I wish we had more opportunities to wear them more often. I am a Trans Woman, and missed out on things like Prom, Winter Formals and the multitude of weddings.
I say, where what you want. You wanna rock a ball gown on a Tuesday, you rock a ball gown on a Tuesday. Life is too short to not get to wear what you wanna wear.
Sweetie? I’m 63 and a mother. I hereby give you permission to wear whatever makes you feel beautiful because you are.
Heck, let's make our own formal events.
ok so playing oppression olympics is bad but what about oppression bingo - being trans, gay, ace, disabled and a trauma survivor I think I almost have a full row! Bingo!
What, no person of colour? You do have "religiously persecuted" though. The "by religion" not "for religion" one. :'3 Hugs to you, sweet bean (if you like any, that is!).
Let me play with you: cis woman, demi and pan, neurospicy, ex endo patient, still who-the-heck--knows-why chronic pain patient, "trauma who? that's just my life!", immigrant (white though + as tiny kid so ppl don't know unless they spout bigoted stuff n I growl at them for it and smack them with "I'm an immigrant, too, by the way!").
Ain't life "fun" when there's not only a bazillion extra hurdles but then ppl are also normatively inept at emotion management (not suppression, processing. Thanks, sexism!) so they can't be kind and emotion vomit on your path every other step of the way like it's all about them? 😮💨
Makes you wonder why they keep framing "normal" = "happy & healthy & kind". When every single one of us has more capacity for it, with just a fraction of their resources! And ppl seem more lacking in all of that all, the less fields in oppression bingo they can tick. A single scratch below the surface and I wonder why they fight so dearly over protecting that misery model of theirs.
Don‘t all of those have multiple different bingo cards? 🤔
@@Alina_Schmidt Don't think about it too hard i guess - its just a light-hearted joke about how intersectionality can make the overlapping problems of identity feel more overwhelming together than the sum of them individuality.
I'm not ace or trans, but I have the others. I balance it out by being a biracial Indigenous Australian Jew, though (if you're wondering, the correct term is "Didgerijew".) I'm also ND. I get accused of "playing the oppression Olympics" by arseholes sometimes, though. It pisses me off.
Yahtzee!
The "separate the LGB from..." image that blows my mind the most is the one that includes not just the T and Q but also I and A. Just a bunch of cis (and almost always white) gay and bi people saying "Hey, Intersex people and Asexuals? F--k you."
A correctionif you are talking about the LGB alliance, 90% are just straight people.
Genuine question, why are asexuals included in the community at all? Doesn’t really seem to be any connection. Am I missing something?
@@albertfralinger2711 Because they are a persecuted minority which is non-normative when it comes to sexuality?
Seems pretty cut and dried.
They call it ',The Alphabet People '
Nah, a bunch of heterocis bigots trying to false flag division in our community.
Wait wait wait… chess competitions are gendered? Why on earth? (Obviously sexism, but I’d love to see someone try to rationalize that.)
Edit: thanks to the people who have actually rationalized this in the replies. Turns out the answer is kind of an attempt to counter sexism, and I’ve now learned a lot about competitive chess
Because men don’t want to lose to a woman! I was on my high school chess team back forever ago. The guys on the other teams would always tell me they lost because I thought like a girl. No, they lost because I was a better player!
@@jennifers5560 You certainly were, but what they said bugs me... Are they saying that every girl can beat them?
Because obviously men are so much smarter than women, of course. (This is EXTREME sarcasm, if it isn't clear)
@@GabiAPFRight? That is what they are saying. One guy actually told me that I was cheating because I wasn’t playing how everyone else was playing. I didn’t even know what that meant.
Basically sexism. Chess used to be considered a "men's sport"
This was a fabulously written video. You literally said it all. You are the best. Thank you for all you do for us. ❤❤❤❤❤
She is just an excellent writer and researcher!
Cis woman here, who used the men's toilet at a large event because the line was too long. Was definitely there just to pee, and didn't even look at the men in there, just went straight for the empty stall. In the 1970s. And still do it.
Ma'am, believe it or not, I have had someone straight up accuse me of making that up!! They said they couldn't believe i had to "lie about something so ridiculous".
A thing that almost every woman has ever done. In the history of public restroom lines.
These people have the smoothest brains and completely delusional.😂😂😂 And apparently just pee themselves when the lines are too long😂😂😂
I do this sometimes whenever I see a Broadway show. The women's bathroom lines are so damn long. If no men are in the bathroom, then I use the men's bathroom to avoid long waits
I can't believe how much transphobia there already is in this comment section, less than an hour after this video went live.
Feels like bots tbh
At least I hope it's bots... Geez..
Transphobic gender warriors at work.
@@Cynthia63636 likely, given the IBA ties to the Motherland and the Motherland's targeting esp of US viewers due to the election.
It's the other way round. It takes a bit till stuff is taken down, so it's normal to see bigotry and hate first before it gets moderated. You want to be coming into the comment section a bit later, basically.
Also: algorithms will decide what of comment section you will even see. If you have ever seen many ppl complaining about terrible comments but then found no such thing, then that can be the cause. People went and compared the same comment section of the same e.g. Instagram post and turns out they looked very different based of what the algorithm thought it should show them!! It's really awful stuff! We're not even seeing the same reality when we're entering the same comment sections!!!
once again impressed by jessica's empathy and eloquence. once again frustrated by the lack of respect and critical thinking shown by fully grown human beings. good times
What people like JK Rowling seem not to understand is that cis women and men already have hormone levels which vary amongst people of different nationalities and will also be different at certain life stages (e.g. menopause). I'm a cis woman with naturally broad-ish shoulders and Mediterranean heritage, am naturally hairier than many other women in the UK, and probably have different hormone levels.
The Olympics is about nurturing advantages with training, and if we control for all differences I don't really see the point in its' existence - it's these differences (including hormone levels) that allow for competitions with winners and losers. Also, what about women who develop PCOS, or men who have lower testosterone levels? What about women who have been through menopause? Intersex people exist as well, should they not be allowed to compete? Rowling's very binary worldview is starting to exclude increasing numbers of people.
Also, PCOS is a intesex condition too and it's common in females athletes (and women in general). People just never bat an eye for it because they don't think PCOS is "deviant enough to be intersex", including most gynecologists.
Yep. Like should we go back up forcing cis women onto testosterone blockers because their bodies naturally produce more than the "acceptable" levels of testosterone for a woman? (Well that's assuming it ever stopped happening)
A great example of intersectionality is Ms Marvel aka Kamala Khan. She's a Pakistani Muslim teenager who also happens to be an Inhuman and a mutant with some neurodivergent coding as well. Being a mutant is the latest new experience she has to struggle with, as mutants are "othered" in the Marvel Comics Universe, but her story so far shows that she can roll with all the punches.
I've just rewatched the series and she's one of my favourite Marvel characters
Kamala is my favorite!
i didn’t realize she was a character at first and was mildly confused lmaooo
literally grew up reading the comics in my local library, superheroes had never grabbed me before but she’s so 🫶
I think it's also important to point out in addition to the large overlap between bi+ and trans is the fact that these communities bonded also over the fact that originally, they were both rejected by lesbian and gay activists. Bi+ centers opened their doors to trans people because they understood that pain and wanted to show that trans people had allies. Going even further back, the early trans medical research spun out of bisexuality research. Our communities are deeply intertwined for decades. It's also why I personally take great umbrage when someone tries to insist that bisexuality is transphobic. It ignores so much history and literally talks over the bi community.
But that said, I really enjoyed this video. Especially the end made me really take pause. I wouldn't say I don't give myself the grace about my pain, but more that I don't give myself the grace to be as loud as I should about my accomplishments sometimes. Like I won't call my art good because I'm too aware that there are better artists out there but I'll encourage others in their art.
Sadly it took us awhile, I read about some experiences of transphobia in Bi spaces in the 90s recently which kind of shocked me considering how welcoming it was for me in the late 00s.
Your chapter on not using these kinds of comparisons to minimise your own pain really touched me. I'm very impressed at your video essay skills in general and how you connected all the dots in an engaging and interesting way and then also managed to pull at my heartstrings with that. It's always a delight to see you, even talking about such horrible topics.
Such a great video! The hair, the outfit the actual essay part!!!❤
I love that the resources you used are on the screen, but would be awesome if they were also in the description so it would be easier to look at them if I'm interested in reading more into them.
Thank you for spotting this, we just forgot to add them! They are available in the description now 💝
thank you for standing up for all women
this "what.?" with the little running , genius. you are marvelous. and the "oh i'm deaf. I'll live" i love it. you speak the terms.
Theres way too many similar comments that look close enough to real people but saying weird transphobic things.. 👀👀 it feels like bots..
I totally get the "other people's pain doesn't invalidate YOUR pain" thing. I've always said that it's horrible that people are dying of cancer, but knowing that doesn't make my flu feel any better.
A Jessica x Jammidodger colab would be crazy they’re both incredible
They've done multiple videos together over the years.
It would be fun to watch them roast Transinvestigator posts.
That boxer is not even Trans which makes how she was treated extra insane 😬 !
And from a country that doesn’t recognize transgender people. It’s absolute madness.
Their arguments have always been paper thin, the silver lining is these kinds of events expose the transparency in their hate.
@@alexwixom4599sadly I don’t think it does. If anything I think it’s made transphobia and intersex phobia even more pronounced. It’s gonna get a lot worse for gender non-conforming cis women
@@SarastistheSerpent as i am intersex i Hope you are wrong IT IS already pretty bad out there for anyone outside of what is percieved as "normal".
Thank you jessica for such a good video once again. The ending message about always being worth taken care of was really apreciated :)
There is so much love in this video! Funny and informative in the first parts, so much kindness and support in the last 2 chapters. Thank you!!
Thank you for stating this all so eloquently and with so much good thinking and research!
I have enjoyed your content for years, and this *production* is WONDERFUL!! Love the music, the interplay, and the feedback-it really *does* help with such a heavy and depressing topic of how dehumanizing the world still is towards humans.... thank you for continuing to be a fashionable, caring, and fierce model of living-and how we can each help each other through better understanding.
29:24 "it just did not occur to me try to fix it because it was 'my pain' ... it's other people having problems that deserve to be fixed." WHY DID THAT HIT ME SO HARD? 😭😭
Sharing about problems is also how some autistic people relate and show care. Careful not to lump us in with the insensitive crowd lol.
it can be a common autistic trait and also come across insensitive 😂😭
Yeah, like sharing about related experiences is not inherently problematic. Obviously it can be done in a rude way (I've had people compare my 7 year migraine to their hangover and imply they have it significantly worse), but a lot of people do it to show support, sympathy, [insert applicable feeling here].
This was so helpful. Must admit to a weeny bit of autistic confusion around the sharing of pain part. Am i allowed? Or am i that friend? Is my other autistic friend that friend too? We share our pain one after the other to show we get it. Am i not supposed to do this with allistic friends?
Ah, sorry about that confusion. I also pointed out that framing it this way is problematic. So let me explain what she was most liely thinking about!
There is us ND ppl who genuinely care for our friends and share in their experience by retelling which of our experience made us relate to their situation. It's our way of communicating. Now some allistic people can feel like that is shifting attention from their story and feelings to our story and feelings. While as ND ppl we are more likely to perceive the overlap between both experiences. As it also communicates what aspect of the experience we can relate to.
She was most likely NOT speaking about this dynamic, but it is also a mix-up that happens often and can require that we teach our allistic friends about our communication method!
What allistic people usually refer to and fear, is a different situation and type of person. There are people showing narcissistic behaviour patterns and consciously manipulating patterns. They actively dismiss the experience of people around them, by building a dynamic of "competition of suffering". Rather than sharing a story on how they can relate, they are sharing a story on how they are more pitiful than the first story teller. Thereby implying that they should have all compassion and support before anybody else does, as they have it worse. It can be labeled as "attention seeking" (but people will also abuse this label to sometimes diminish people's valid complaints about a problem).
So, she was using the later dynamic, to describe how different oppressed groups can engage in competition with each other for resources, when the limitation of the resources is an illusion upheld by people in power. In psychology, there's a concept of "scapegoat" when it comes to family dynamics. There's an abuser and the abused rest of the family. And the "scapegoat" of the family is the member of the family who gets "sacrificed" by the other abused family members, since they can escape abuse by siding with the abuser in the abuse of the "scapegoat" family member. Said family members will use tactics like framing themselves as more deserving of the abuser's positive attention than the "scapegoat" family member.
Societally, we have seen concentration on disabled, then women, then gay people and now trans people being put at the centre of abuse, with sometimes people from the societally already slightly more accepted groups framing themselves as more deserving of resources and support than them.
@@KxNOxUTA thank you! ❤️
I claim first comment, as a lesbian
I claim the first comment on your comment, as an asexual ✨
@@Hedwig_3000 XD
this made me giggle 🤣
@@jessicaoutofthecloset I'm glad it did XD
Plant your flag with PRIDE 🎉
When I saw a headline about the trans athlete I felt so disappointed with the world yet again. I mean even the audacity to write some "shocking" headlines is already so rude. It is no one's business! Sexism and all around rudeness towards individual athletes over gender rules have always been one big reason why I hate to watch sports...I mean what was that rule over Norwegian women beach volleyball team where they couldn't wear the uniforms they wanted back in 2021!!! (Of course sometimes there are understandable rules but not that time)
I'm a bisexual woman who happens to be married to a man. Doesn't make me less bi. But it makes me feels less welcomed in LGBTQ+ spaces. As I pass as straight, I was called names and I don't go to Pride anymore. Which is a shame because I would have loved to take my husband to show him my community... that doesn't want me anymore because I love who I happens to love !
My partner's wife is quite straight-passing, and her boyfriend always joins us for pride! You and your husband absolutely should be able to as well!
Sadly a lot of queer spaces are heavily discriminatory. I've had people tell me I don't belong at pride and I'm just appropriating queer people... I'm a non-binary trans demiguy, aroace, and in a queer platonic relationship with a trans woman. But somehow I'm just a straight person appropriating ally culture? Like how would straight work if I'm non-binary? Like let's see lgbTQiA, yep, I'm totally appropriating my own culture. 🤦
This was one of those things were the people doing the hating didn't care at all about facts.
Of course, bigots don't care about facts! They have false beliefs about other people!
I love how every video related to Imane Khalif and the bigotry she's faced that I've seen so far approaches the subject from a different angle. There is so much excellent discussion going on right now, it just shows how one situation can be a springboard for a whole variety of discourse.
And yeah, just goes to show how important intersectionality is!
I came here for an interesting video and left tearing up for being called out for not having self compassion. Love you Jessica. ❤
I actually once counselled a bisexual woman to advocate on behalf of herself. She said she didn't because she figured other groups needed support more, but I asked her to consider that by advocating for herself, she also makes space for people who are trans and bisexual to be themselves.
Advocating for any group helps all of us in the end, and advocating for your own rights is important. In fact, you are important. You shouldn't put your own needs aside just because others need help more. Help out if you can, and push with everyone else when the moment comes that someone else needs YOUR support, but don't give up your own fight. It matters too.
And heck, the rest of us will probably try to help when your moment comes.
my husband plays chess competitively with a chess club in the country we live in, and he has competed against many women (some might've been trans, he didn't care), because CHESS IS CO-ED!!!! hahahahahahahah, so when he heard about the trans ban in chess (not in the country we live in, thank gawd, lol), he said it was joked about (as being the stupidest thing ever) and leaving his chess club dismayed, lol, by the way, the captain of my husband's club is a woman, lol, if she was trans, no one in the club would care.
My partner used to play in chess tournaments as a child and his teacher was a woman and he also played against girls and boys as well. It was all about skill level not sex or gender because in the end skill is the only thing that matters in chess. The only advantage my partner has over me in that game is that he actually learned it and I'm just scraping by with half learned stuff I picked up over the years. That's not because I was assigned female at birth though
Thank you for caring and protecting trans people of all types. Intersex too. This being a 'controversial' topic is so disgusting to me
The pillow story 🥲 So relatable. Also I figured out that if I put my mattress back on the bed after airing it out in a particular direction I'll have pains. For some odd reason it looks the same on both ends but turning it one way will hurt whereas the other it won't! It's such a puzzling thing! And with chronic pains, you often just cannot even tell the cause may not be "the usual stuff"
29:23 “It just didn’t occur to me to try and fix it because it was my pain, and it feels like that’s not what needs fixing”
This part made me a bit weepy
29:58 … Bless you for bringing Comparative Suffering up! I first was introduced to the Psychological concept by Brené Brown. I’d totally blanked on the terms as it’d been several years since I last discussed it. And it most certainly contributes to those who resist Intersectionality in Socio-Political spheres. Thank you so much. 🙏💖✨
This is one of your best videos, covering the topic in such an indepth manner. Bravo for taking this on, interweaving the political and personal seamlessly. 👏 😊
I really appreciate how coherently you laid out the concept of intersectionality, great video (and look) as always!
You are my entire vibe, Jessica. ❤The world needs you desperately and I'm so glad you're a prominent face in it. 💖
I was in Quebec City, Canada, a little while ago, and a lot of the bathrooms were unisex. Not the single room with one toilet and a locked door kind. The “typical” one room with multiple stalls and wall of sinks, kind. The main door was left open, if there was a main door, and ppl just walked into stalls, did their thing, came out, washed their hands, and left. It was kinda amusing when men would be all huffy that there was “only one bathroom!?” and they had to wait, but no women expressed discomfort or fear
Ugh, I saw an adult throw a complete freaking temper tantrum over unisex bathrooms. In this case it was a row of single use bathrooms that each had a toilet, sink and mirror (a few were larger, and a few had baby changing tables, all clearly marked) right off the side of a hallway in a restaurant. The manager ended up having to get involved because she kept demanding to know where the women's bathroom was because she absolutely refused to let her daughter use the same bathroom as a man. Yeah, I don't think her daughter knew the difference between men and Mars because this baby was six months old at most.
This happened in Brazil too, but I imagine Khalif won’t be able to sue them😔
Thanks for the introduction to this term. I always heard of it happening In femenist movements but only understood it as a clash of intersectonality. I struggle understanding identity, but the way you explained it definitely opened a new window for me.
I believe evil is self-defeating. The more they try to spread hate, the more people they alienate. Not to say we shouldn't fight back, but it's that little belief that prevents me from giving up.
25:00 I am Russian lesbian. I know that it is out of topic, but I want to share my story. So I left Russia a year and a half ago, but i still visit it a lot. So this summer while visiting Russia, I was protesting, even though it’s literally deadly dangerous. I was sticking LGBT support fliers to the buildings, wearing LGBT support badges, and just screaming some stuff out on the street. I know it sound like nothing, but that’s all I could do as a 13 year old girl. The thing is that in that age, if I get caught my parents would get in jail. When I turn 14 it’s already me who is going to jail, so I can do more stuff. It does sound like an excuse, but you can just google cases when kids were put in jail for posting videos that support LGBT, Ukraine, or anything else that our government doesn’t.
More rights for one group doesn’t mean less rights for others.
It’s not pie! 🥧
I was hoping you'd do a video on this subject, thank you!!
This is my favourite post so far. Wonderful!
I agree with every word, the world needs to hear this so I'm sharing it, hope everyone else does too.
"I'm DYING to hear your reasoning. Oh, I'm deaf. I'll live." 🤣🤣🤣🔥
Not me, immediately proving that knee-jerk reaction of "great, all of the other groups are being talked about..." before asexual was mentioned 😂 Great video as always.
Same!
Thank you Jessica for your wonderfull insightfull video. As gracefull as always.
Incredible video with a wonderful message. Thank you!
I'll need to listen to the last part about deserving to take care of ourselves, that our pain isn't irrelevant because other's is bigger. I need to get that in my brain.
I know even when I was in the hospital for my depression, I repeated I felt like I was stealing the place of someone who needed it more than me. It's easier to give that grace to others than to myself.
❤
So much work has gone into this video, thank you, such a valuable discussion- and I love the tie up at the end. ❤
Absolutely and thoroughly unrelated to the topic of the video but I absolutely love that in your red outfit youre wearing both necklaces and a brooch because I always feel slightlybself conscious about styling that way since so many people seem to think jewelry should be minimal. Sometimes your necklaces and pins play off each other so nicely.
Delightful video as always
Great video! You cover so much ground!
Thank you for such a thoughtful and well explained video.
This one made me cry Jessica but in the best of ways. I am lesbian, transgender, transitioning whom is also riddled with chronic pain that likes to evolve and shift often thanks to severe CPTSD experiences.
During the Olympics, I cheered that Algerian boxer on as she was being herself and proud to represent her country. Thank goodness she received gold! and she was defended. She was attacked by cruel cisgender people for being at first trans and when it was broadcast and proven she was cis, a "relief" came out. That immediately invalidated trans women who were treated like second-class citizens. There were so many women in my community that felt gut punched by that sentiment - thank goodness she's cisgender female, not trans after all. Somehow that was okay.
Everything else discussed about oppression, intersectionalism, being shamed for your disability not being considered as severe as others etc etc? By my goddess Jessica you touched on everything that just strikes me in the darkest areas of my feels!
I have followed your videos for years and get such inspiration from almost each and every one and always education from every single one. This one I wish was shown to high school kids in about grade 10 so that they could work on being better people before they stepped out into the adult world. I've shared this with so many of my friends.
Thank you for putting such an eloquent and exacting voice to these issues in this video. I needed to hear all of these things so badly tonight. You helped me feel it was okay to be myself and that yes, so many are so wrong about how they discuss the related subjects whether purposefully or inadvertently, leading to judging others based on their gender, sexual preference, disability etc etc etc.
Thank you for being you. You are always so honest and forthright. I draw a lot of confidence and inspiration from how you and Claudia present yourselves. You two are by far my favorite couple in this world when it comes to honest love and I delight in seeing how you both love each other so honestly and simply. I love seeing love. I don't know why it is so hard for people just to want to love and be loved. I see that in both of you. I wanted to take the opportunity to express how I feel when I see you two.
I hope Elon stops being a billionaire out of this too. I hope the transgender mascot of the IKEA Blahaj tells the orcas to tip over JKs super yacht. I hope Logan Paul loses his shirt and is never able to do business again. There has been cheering in the trans women circles about how silent JK Rowling has been since the lawsuit was launched. The deafening silence from her lack of posting hate in her socials has been a wonderful relief.
Please be of peace, know you are loved truly by many and that you are honestly one of the best examples of humanity the world has to offer. Bumps and all. Please take care of that wonderful little boy and that amazing wife of yours. - Tasha from Canada.
How Am I just now finding you? You are amazing 🎉🎉🎉
Thank you for this well made video with such strong messages ❤
Thank you for saying plainly and clearly that racism is one of the main reasons that people are claiming Imane Khalif is a "man". She looks the way she does because she's Algerian and a boxer, not because she's hiding some great big gender secret. But people expect all women to fit a white western beauty standard, so since she doesn't fit that she's getting transvestigated.
Such a good video. Thank you for covering this topic (these topics, I should say!). Your channel is so informative and your empathy is so refreshing in the current divisive environment. Cheering you on. Many thanks.
Yes! It's the research. It's the presentation and my desire to be respectful but I keep focusing on the vintage fashion, hair and makeup loveliness of the presenter and the patter plus sass delivery. Love! Keep up the good work! I am one of those "g" in lgbtqia that respect all of the other letters and want us to stay together. My safety has been improved because I am bald and old and have become less visible. Safety through aging.
“Safety through aging” that made me laugh! Pretty much my wife and I look like those older Aunts that every family seems to have…
thanks for covering this!!!
21:26 THANKS, I just don't understand it, when all this came out the first thought in my mind was how can they be so blind to THIS FACT?
someone found an old tweet of rowling from a few years back where she proudly stated that she was willing to go to jail for her beliefs, sure hope she won't attempt any takebacksies now that she's brought to court for them :p
Amazing video