Absolutely. The minute we realise that we need the other, whoever they are, we need to control them so they won't hurt us, disappoint us, leave us, let us down, etc etc etc. The saying by Dorothy Parker "love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave your fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away" This is very profound. As soon as we can realise this and not believe what we have been told for generations "how do I live without you?" and "the way you make me feel" and other lies, the sooner we will be free to live our best lives. No one has the right to control another. We are not puppets, slaves, serfs or robots. We are individual sovereign beings. Find your tribe. When you feel relaxed, at ease and free around people, you will know you have found your tribe. We are not meant to be shackled or tethered to family, friends or coworkers unless those groups of people support your freedom. Love is freedom, liberation. Beautifully said. This woman is very wise. Most are imprisoned and stuck. Children are always telling us "let go of your script of who you need me to be" but we have been deaf. I believe part ot the allostatic load, the wear and tear on humans is tied to feeling tied up with another. I know I have felt ill for a long, long time feeling tied up with others.
"I have to let go of the ego, the should-have and the FANTASY life and enter into the as-is, surrender to the grace of THIS moment." This woman just says all the right things!
I am telling you! She is always saying the right things and much more right way, which makes you want to listen more and more. I am privileged to hear and learn from her.
God i love this talk so much thank u to dr shefali bcuz her work is so important. I can totally relate n see where she's coming from its so true coming from my experience that parents can be so blinded by what they call love for their children. When it is nothing but toxic bcuz it is blind. They have conditional love for u the child. They do not accept the child for who they r. They only love the child they envision to be n to become n when the child does not meet this they become angry at the child n blame the child n tell the child to change to meet their expectations n they tell the child that this expectation comes from love. It is very toxic and this is wat makes children grow up to be confused n lose themselves as adults.
thank u oprah...love u...this video made my day....ppl around us always make us think of future and we lose our presence and linger in future which isnt there...this video reminded me to be present in this day which is today...m feeling so gud and full of life....Thank u,thank u.
Dr.Shefali n Oprah thanq.its a great message to the present parents which show the direction of real meaning of quality kind of luv in order to get back the same loving nature with balancing kind of understanding . so impressive presentation with great views towards welfare of the society.much luv
I feel the same way I'm listening and as I learn understand what said coz I see something so profound and then it's done. Do I guess now that i have the awareness a new thing is possible
My parents were not possessive, did not control nor pressure my siblings and I at all and the effect was chaos because there was no parental figure. We had to go through life groping in the dark and I grew up yearning for structure, wisdom and moral ascendancy. My older brother wasnt able to muster the grace to survive and hasnt recovered from the damage of having parents who stepped back. Dr Shefali's message applies to children who are lucky enough to have parents who passionately care about their children (and are being chided for it) but what about children who are neglected that it borders on abuse. Sadly, her message seems more aimed at privileged and first world parents/families and not a universal one.
I totally understand when you are coming from. I have had the same situation at home - there was no structure and almost no expectations and that is truly devastating. Our parents offered us passive parenting. I think Dr.Shefali message is about conscious parenting - where parents do not interfere with child’s identity but it does not mean that no discipline is offered. I won’t mind that.
i couldn't agree more about the importance of not trying to control anyone, including our children. But having high expectations actually pushes them to grow, and I'm not talking just in the academic success. it's called Pygmalion effect
whilst love may liberate, it's context here does not apply in marriage, no. in marriage there is commitment, there is compromise, there is unconditional which in retrospect imply conditional...therefore, you have to determine on what ground you are standing. sinking soil or a rock? ....thoughts are in multitudes
True love does liberate. We have been conditioned to enslave others not liberate them. We have a tendency to live off measurements of how much the other loves, likes or cares. Those measurements cause so much harm. You only have to look to social media platforms like facebook and instagram to see the harm. More likes = feel good. No likes = feel bad. Nothing comes from outside. Worth, value, love, etc. It's an inside job.
He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasenth him betimes. (Proverbs 13:24. KJV) This is ancient knowledge presented as new insight.
If you are interested in continuing your journey to conscious relationships...check out the Aligned Pillow Talk podcast by married couple John & Kathy Stringer facebook.com/awakenedpillowtalk/
This actually applies to ALL relationships not only parent-child relationships.
Absolutely. The minute we realise that we need the other, whoever they are, we need to control them so they won't hurt us, disappoint us, leave us, let us down, etc etc etc.
The saying by Dorothy Parker "love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave your fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away"
This is very profound. As soon as we can realise this and not believe what we have been told for generations "how do I live without you?" and "the way you make me feel" and other lies, the sooner we will be free to live our best lives. No one has the right to control another. We are not puppets, slaves, serfs or robots. We are individual sovereign beings. Find your tribe. When you feel relaxed, at ease and free around people, you will know you have found your tribe. We are not meant to be shackled or tethered to family, friends or coworkers unless those groups of people support your freedom.
Love is freedom, liberation. Beautifully said. This woman is very wise. Most are imprisoned and stuck. Children are always telling us "let go of your script of who you need me to be" but we have been deaf. I believe part ot the allostatic load, the wear and tear on humans is tied to feeling tied up with another. I know I have felt ill for a long, long time feeling tied up with others.
Absolutely! True love is unconditional, zero controlling, and sees a person and treats a person for who you truly are.
"I have to let go of the ego, the should-have and the FANTASY life and enter into the as-is, surrender to the grace of THIS moment." This woman just says all the right things!
I am telling you! She is always saying the right things and much more right way, which makes you want to listen more and more. I am privileged to hear and learn from her.
I happen to understand consciousness differently 🙃,if crazy it must be a woman 🥹
I know this lady is so good ❤
Omg she has hit it correctly on the point
The concept is ancient yet so refreshing, much love ❤
Exactly!
I love Oprah's Hair....couldn't take my eyes off of it.😗
Wow - Dr Shefali is AMAZING! Powerful insights - Thank you :)
She is. I only found her recently and bought her books straight away. I was blown away. Amazing teachings.
She is stunning and so smart
This definitely spoke to me.
God i love this talk so much thank u to dr shefali bcuz her work is so important. I can totally relate n see where she's coming from its so true coming from my experience that parents can be so blinded by what they call love for their children. When it is nothing but toxic bcuz it is blind. They have conditional love for u the child. They do not accept the child for who they r. They only love the child they envision to be n to become n when the child does not meet this they become angry at the child n blame the child n tell the child to change to meet their expectations n they tell the child that this expectation comes from love. It is very toxic and this is wat makes children grow up to be confused n lose themselves as adults.
Wow, this is precious!! Thank youDr. Shefali
Dr. S is so beautiful she looks like a model
& her smile ;)
I know... I am mesmerised when she speaks loool
Not really the point, is it
She is on point! I love everything she said--
Great examples
Thank you
thank u oprah...love u...this video made my day....ppl around us always make us think of future and we lose our presence and linger in future which isnt there...this video reminded me to be present in this day which is today...m feeling so gud and full of life....Thank u,thank u.
Dr.Shefali n Oprah thanq.its a great message to the present parents which show the direction of real meaning of quality kind of luv in order to get back the same loving nature with balancing kind of understanding . so impressive presentation with great views towards welfare of the society.much luv
Sheesh! That was a gem. I needed to hear that lol.
wow...this takes parenting another level
Let your children liberate you and they will be liberated in the process.
All these videos end so abruptly that I instantly forget the wisdom I just heard :(
I still love you though, Oprah!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Play it again
I feel the same way I'm listening and as I learn understand what said coz I see something so profound and then it's done. Do I guess now that i have the awareness a new thing is possible
This is only a snippet from a bigger video.
Thank you!
wow what a true message thank you.
love without awareness of the individuality of our loved ones is.....chaos
Yep. The story of our fragmented family. This is an extremely accurate statement. ❤
Such wisdom
A short beautiful clip...
My parents were not possessive, did not control nor pressure my siblings and I at all and the effect was chaos because there was no parental figure. We had to go through life groping in the dark and I grew up yearning for structure, wisdom and moral ascendancy. My older brother wasnt able to muster the grace to survive and hasnt recovered from the damage of having parents who stepped back. Dr Shefali's message applies to children who are lucky enough to have parents who passionately care about their children (and are being chided for it) but what about children who are neglected that it borders on abuse. Sadly, her message seems more aimed at privileged and first world parents/families and not a universal one.
I totally understand when you are coming from. I have had the same situation at home - there was no structure and almost no expectations and that is truly devastating. Our parents offered us passive parenting.
I think Dr.Shefali message is about conscious parenting - where parents do not interfere with child’s identity but it does not mean that no discipline is offered. I won’t mind that.
interesting - asian households usually the opposite occurs, where there is too much control
Awakening🌟🌟
WHO IS SHE?!? This is 💡💡💡
Love what u do
i couldn't agree more about the importance of not trying to control anyone, including our children. But having high expectations actually pushes them to grow, and I'm not talking just in the academic success. it's called Pygmalion effect
But this is true in a marriage as well.
Yes!!
And I love you too
God is love but emotions become blind
whilst love may liberate, it's context here does not apply in marriage, no. in marriage there is commitment, there is compromise, there is unconditional which in retrospect imply conditional...therefore, you have to determine on what ground you are standing. sinking soil or a rock? ....thoughts are in multitudes
you're very smart, i didn't see that before, thank you
Oprah - Dr Shefali ,, best. .. your feeling of. >>> Divine Spark // how take
Love need consiousness.
I hear a lot of J Krishnamurti in her.
anyone know where to find the full interview?
Imagine if people running our organizations could manage with consciousness and presence.
"True love liberates" Maya Angelou said, now Dr.S is saying too. hmmm!
Llane Kay it
Maybe she’s learnt this on her own path probably!
maya angelou didnt invent the concept.
Two distinct smart women that see the core of what liberation is all about. Let's join them; in this case- the more the merrier( literally!).
True love does liberate. We have been conditioned to enslave others not liberate them. We have a tendency to live off measurements of how much the other loves, likes or cares. Those measurements cause so much harm. You only have to look to social media platforms like facebook and instagram to see the harm. More likes = feel good. No likes = feel bad. Nothing comes from outside. Worth, value, love, etc. It's an inside job.
No se les olvide respirar.
Wow, realized I can't date anyone who has not heard this first.
He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasenth him betimes. (Proverbs 13:24. KJV) This is ancient knowledge presented as new insight.
Mythos EXACTLY. IN THE BIBLE
Oprah interrupts so much!!! That's so annoying
If you are interested in continuing your journey to conscious relationships...check out the Aligned Pillow Talk podcast by married couple John & Kathy Stringer facebook.com/awakenedpillowtalk/
A child having a tantrum at their Birthday party a parent has spent $1,000 on is down to bad manners. A parent is supposed to ignore that???
Hit like if you agree Dr looks like the indian Actress Aishwarya Rai?
First and foremost STOP USING THE WORD LOVE. ITS ATTACHMENT
She looks a bit like Aishwarya rai
Jens Jamie if you close your eyes, she even sounds like her! Haha! Both are stunning 💕
I only thumbed down this video because it was at a certain number that I don't like. :(