He's not very funny at all, most of them aren't....Comedians USED to be funny, this is something totally different, like just a bunch of creepy weirdos
Anything with Burr and Segura is awesome. I have been watchin em on Netflix non stop for months. They make me wanna try stand-up. I love makin people laugh
don't try. look at workshops, look at improv groups, do theatre or rap battles or debate & storytelling, develop related skills... there's already too many yerk-offs doing amateur hour while their real gig is being a low rent hustler and tiktok influencer. Do you want to be the next Goop, are you ready to sell candles that smell like your genitals after you've placed an egg inside them for a week?
I am a super light weight, I take like one hit, maybe two, if its edibles a 10mg gummy gets me good. I went to a festival this weekend with some friends and took a 20mg gummy and was high as Pterodactyl tits , was still high and hung over till like noon the next day, didn't drink a drop of alcohol lol.
@dillonpierce7869 So true. That 'idle ' certainly isn't always a good thing. Current environment woykd show bad things are coming from that person soon
@@ronharvey8442 well I'm among those people sometimes is another problem. 😂 Just try to avoid everything that makes me angry as much as possible to keep from any issues.
And it's TRUE! The other person knowing the trauma stories and literal "stressors", and STILL confused why I am this now, and me escalated. Because calling things triggers and stressors was STILL just not enough breadcrumbs.
I once used cannabutter from stems to make brownies. I gave my parents two and told them to only eat half of one an hour before they ate. Then to wait a couple hours after to see how they felt. They didn't listen. Apparently they spent four hours giggling and hugging.
When I first saw Tom Segura I didn't think I'd like his standup. But, he's so direct and makes so much sense I agree with him as much as I think he's really funny.
It's gotta be a common problem. My family looks bad as a unit as well. Me, mom, autistic, permanently clicking a fidget device, 19yo pothead son, 16yo goth son, 15yo world's shortest basketball player son, 4yo son who only talks about his dead dad. Winning.
@@kingayy9267 it's not as sad as you'd think. He does have someone to talk to and obviously he doesn't feel that it's bad or wrong to talk about freshly
Nate Bargatze is so right about children in bed with you. I call my grand a heat seeking missile. He's all over me in the bed, but he wakes up in the morning and says so sweet, "Good Morning, Grandma," and all is well. 😍😍
Lmao....my husband said he needs our kids to know how to swear, as it was such an uncomfortable thing for him. Hes legit proud when our kiddo will swear correctly He is EIGHT.
Parents in their 60s, so true to my life it’s like he’s been watching me the last couple of months. Me and my wife have had those exact conversations earlier in the year, “I guess we’re in charge now” and your parents don’t tell you, they just start acting dependent. We hosted Christmas Day this year too.
@@chrisbond6406kinda weird to stalk someone like that. I’m sure you’re gonna do the same to me after you see this! And Bert is a pretty solid comedian, some people just don’t like his style of comedy which is fine, doesn’t mean you have to hate in him
9:05 The only time my father was ever impressed by me is when I took apart and fixed his oscillating fan. The only time my mother was impressed by me is when I was assistant manager at Fabricland, and even then she delighted at telling her friends I was 'on probation' (there's a three month trial period for middle-management positions, or at least there was back then)
"We're not an 'I love you' family." That, and then the story he shared, both break my heart. I don't know if it's true for him specifically, but I know plenty of families like that. And I just don't get it. I was raised by parents who have ALWAYS made sure to tell everyone that they love them, even if they're arguing. We always make sure our loved ones KNOW that we love them, and how much they mean to us. None of us believe you could ever tell someone you love them enough times, or too many.
It's important to say it for sure but SAYING it is the easy part. L9ve is a verb. I have a family member who uses it as a filler. It doesn't really mean much in that context.
I grew up in family where my mother never told us I love you and my old man would only tell us when he was drunk and about ready to beat the hell out of my mom. Good times.
My mother was so tired after having us that she genuinely woke up breastfeeding a pillow one night. This joke is spot on 😂 My mom was RIGHT THERE helping me because she remembered the chaos. Lol. ❤
Everyone hates on Bert but I like him and his comedy. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be his friend and hang out, Florida-Man is best observed from a distance, preferably with plexiglass or iron bars between you.
My cousin and i were looting my grandpa's attic for photographs and we found my grandma's noods. I'd successfully repressed that memory until i clicked this
He's a fucking weirdo. Creepy as hell I can't look at him it's like looking at Jeffry Dahmer or some shit. I would never leave someone I know alone with bort. I can't figure what the thing is with him but his vibes are way off.
Edibles don’t work on me. I’m jealous. It’s crazy how some people can eat 10 mg and get high , I could eat 1000 mg with absolutely nothing? Something to do with enzymes from your liver ?
Smoking weed is better than edibles anyway, edibles don't do shit for me either other than helping me get a good night's sleep. I've been smoking weed for 47 years now
Yea 1000mg does absolutely nothing or, at most, puts me to sleep but I never get high. I do, however, trip super hard when I smoke...cigarettes...dipped in angel dust.
My grandparents never said I love you to any of us, not my parents or me. Never. They were both WWII vets. Nurse/ Sgt. They said, take care, never goodbye either, it was take care, see you later. Both sets did that. Weird. ONE time! My grandmother said at my wedding reception. "I'm disappointed you HAVE to get married, but I still love you."
10:16: I had a boss tell me once that grandkids are a different ❤ & that she actually ❤ hers more than her actual kid's kid's & 🤷♀️ about this tho having kids wakens biology in ways nvr expected.😊 16:45: This is my daughter & nephew!! 👍 video for these are amazingly 😂 pple & I ❤ stand up bestest.😊😊❤
I got a double dose of liquid LSD. THE GUY PUT 1 DROP ON EVERYONES TONGUE. GOT TO ME AND PUT ALMOST THE WHOLE DYRINGE ON MY TONGUE. I WAS TRIPPIN SO HARD. I WAS SEEING SHIT MOVE IN THE SKY. BY 6 AM I WAS STILL HIGH. I WAS LIKE PRAYING TO GOD TO MAKE IT GO AWAY. LMFAO.
If Tom and Bert are still friends, why isn’t Tom breaking the news to Bert about how funny he isn’t? Friends don’t let friends do stand up if one of the friends is hearing crickets.
You don't think Bert's funny, cool, alot of people dont, however his success, his sold out shows and his large fan base says that your opinion isn't fact, isn't that crazy?
Kevin is right kids swear, I remember saying Mother Fker when I was pretty young and my grandma heard me. I got in trouble. As an adult Fuk is my favorite word, so versitile.
People don’t like him because there are a lot of clips of him acting very entitled and egotistical when he’s basically only known as “the machine guy”. He referred to people who aren’t comedians as ‘normal people’ and they seemed to rustle a lot of jimmies so now even clips that people used to like of his are getting a lot of hate now since people are scrutinizing his work since he thinks so highly of himself
To be fair I've thought the same about my own family when out, so it's not crazy to think that 2 comedians thought of their family in that sense to use in a set
4:01 THC naïve people can literally enjoy not having the recirculating thoughts. Doesn't take but one or two miss-doses to kick that sense of heaven out of your dome.
That's so weird. That's such an ass beatable offense you don't drug someone. Tom is suspect af to me for that and being friends with Bort. Bort most definitely has raped several ppl he's so creepy. Mark my words Borts career ends in orange jumpsuit. Don't copy things you see online. You need to rethink your life.
Hell No!!! The machine needs no shirt, the machine probably needs no clothing it's already a social manner he comes on with pants. Lol.. I couldn't imagine it'd be as comical with the shirt.. lol, he's one of the best fs
"Tom I am fizzing" 😂😂 I love his mother she's hilarious 😆👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾. Especially when she accused him of trying to kill her lol.
😂🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭
2:55 Tom Segura's impression of his mother's accent is hilarious and kind of cute, especially the word "gummies."
Gaahmies
Oh you should watch his podcast - that’s all he does. It’s 😂
Honestly
9p😊😊@@mikenormandy9250
@@mikenormandy9250😊p😊
He's not very funny at all, most of them aren't....Comedians USED to be funny, this is something totally different, like just a bunch of creepy weirdos
Anything with Burr and Segura is awesome. I have been watchin em on Netflix non stop for months. They make me wanna try stand-up. I love makin people laugh
They’re really funny
Personally in my opinion
I like burrs comedy better
I prefer the style of blunt honesty he uses
don't try. look at workshops, look at improv groups, do theatre or rap battles or debate & storytelling, develop related skills... there's already too many yerk-offs doing amateur hour while their real gig is being a low rent hustler and tiktok influencer. Do you want to be the next Goop, are you ready to sell candles that smell like your genitals after you've placed an egg inside them for a week?
Don't you mean samurai Saag-GERR-ah !
@@francus7227 sounds Japanese, thats cuz your sayin it like it's Japanese 🤣
@@brandenhudson7782
Yes..... 555.
Mega dosed myself by accident. Woke up the next day HIGH AS F@CK, trying to go to work. Did not go good....😂😂😂😂😂
I am a super light weight, I take like one hit, maybe two, if its edibles a 10mg gummy gets me good. I went to a festival this weekend with some friends and took a 20mg gummy and was high as Pterodactyl tits , was still high and hung over till like noon the next day, didn't drink a drop of alcohol lol.
been there... tried to take a cold shower before my shift to shake it off but I was just standing in there thinking "oh, fuck ...."
That was a great variety of acts!!.Bravo... Laughter is truly a great medicine
I needed to see this so bad
2:27 best bit from Tom ever 😂😂
If that's the best then he sucks
Whomever chose these clips, these comics, understands good work. Nothing wasted
Exct that one 'm'.
Yes ! 😂😂
I idle at 75 mph...makes me bust out laughing every time.
There's alot of people out here like that lately lol. 😬
@dillonpierce7869 So true. That 'idle ' certainly isn't always a good thing. Current environment woykd show bad things are coming from that person soon
@@ronharvey8442 well I'm among those people sometimes is another problem. 😂 Just try to avoid everything that makes me angry as much as possible to keep from any issues.
@dillonpierce7869 Aren't we all...lol. Despite our gained humanity, we are an animal and display bad behaviors.
And it's TRUE! The other person knowing the trauma stories and literal "stressors", and STILL confused why I am this now, and me escalated. Because calling things triggers and stressors was STILL just not enough breadcrumbs.
I love how Tom Segura's mom sounds like Scarface.
Charro is the best.
"Gaahmies"
"Tom I am fizzing" 😂😂😂 Wth does "fizzing" mean?? His mother is too funny 🤣🤣 especially when she accused him of trying to kill her lol.
She's a political refugee.
Nope the maid in family guy
"I'm bleeding & I can't subtract" Taylor T! Your sass is delicious
That sass without the s 😂😂😂 but really though she’s absolutely hilarious few female comedians actually keep my attention
I like how john is wearing a full suit, but bert can't even wear a shirt
I once used cannabutter from stems to make brownies. I gave my parents two and told them to only eat half of one an hour before they ate. Then to wait a couple hours after to see how they felt. They didn't listen. Apparently they spent four hours giggling and hugging.
😂😂😂😂😂😉👍
"Hugging"
@@B0ULLIE yes they were attempting but they couldn't stop laughing. So they laughed til they fell asleep.
Cannabutter?
@@katleeBalboaStJulian the ingredients after being ground finely and decarboxolized are fat and alcohol soluble. You do the math.
Bill burr and John mulaney had my stomach hurting 😂😂. They are a cut above the rest of their peers I tell ya.
Nah
Great stuff, except for Bill Burr, can't stand this guy.
Check out Kyle Kinane, another absolute Monster.
Kevin Hart’s exactly right. My kids cuss the second they think I’m not listening.
True. But him calling his son a b*tch because he wouldnt cuss back is so freaking weird.
Whatever theater John Mullaney is at is stunning
Radio City Music Hall in NYC !
Radio City Music Hall
You appear to be stunning as well.....respectful ly?
@@jefforious2000uh oh who showed uncle jeff how to use youtube🤫🤦🏻
@@jefforious2000oh honey no
When I first saw Tom Segura I didn't think I'd like his standup. But, he's so direct and makes so much sense I agree with him as much as I think he's really funny.
You know you watch alot of comedy when youve seen every clips full set already 😂
i never knew bert and kevin both had a story/joke about their families not looking good as a unit.
It's gotta be a common problem. My family looks bad as a unit as well. Me, mom, autistic, permanently clicking a fidget device, 19yo pothead son, 16yo goth son, 15yo world's shortest basketball player son, 4yo son who only talks about his dead dad. Winning.
Was that a joke..?
@roadlesstraveled34
The part about the four-year-old is sad.
Hope he's doing all right and has someone he can talk to.
@@kingayy9267 it's not as sad as you'd think. He does have someone to talk to and obviously he doesn't feel that it's bad or wrong to talk about freshly
who writes the material
3:58 I WISH I could talk my mom into taking two gummies.
Sneak attack +100
My son is saying, no mum, you can only have two. Poor 40yr old kid.
Nate Bargatze is so right about children in bed with you. I call my grand a heat seeking missile. He's all over me in the bed, but he wakes up in the morning and says so sweet, "Good Morning, Grandma," and all is well. 😍😍
Lmao....my husband said he needs our kids to know how to swear, as it was such an uncomfortable thing for him. Hes legit proud when our kiddo will swear correctly
He is EIGHT.
That's.... concerning.
@alienhunter50 it's not. He's a great dad, and a great kid.
smart. Teach em proper grammar early
@@aliengranpa that the dad couldn't use his cuss words correctly as a kid? I totally agree.
We out here fizzing tonight baby!
Bert, Kevin Hart did the “Family Team” joke first.
Parents in their 60s, so true to my life it’s like he’s been watching me the last couple of months. Me and my wife have had those exact conversations earlier in the year, “I guess we’re in charge now” and your parents don’t tell you, they just start acting dependent. We hosted Christmas Day this year too.
12:24 Why is this guy still TOPLESS? (Starts imaging first set as Queen of Sheeba)
If he can't be funny, at least he can be repulsive I guess.
"but sometimes he would be gay ...." i love John
Comedians and Bert
At least he's better at making daughters than comedy
Bert is funny, should be 'Comedians and Bill'
@@KriliumBills worst is Bert’s best.
@@johnfaulkner7522so wrong but coming from someone like you, I can see how you would make that statement. Take care Johnny!
@@chrisbond6406kinda weird to stalk someone like that. I’m sure you’re gonna do the same to me after you see this! And Bert is a pretty solid comedian, some people just don’t like his style of comedy which is fine, doesn’t mean you have to hate in him
I’m fizzin 😂😂😂 gotta use that 😅
Fizzin is a great one to use
9:05 The only time my father was ever impressed by me is when I took apart and fixed his oscillating fan. The only time my mother was impressed by me is when I was assistant manager at Fabricland, and even then she delighted at telling her friends I was 'on probation' (there's a three month trial period for middle-management positions, or at least there was back then)
"We're not an 'I love you' family."
That, and then the story he shared, both break my heart.
I don't know if it's true for him specifically, but I know plenty of families like that. And I just don't get it. I was raised by parents who have ALWAYS made sure to tell everyone that they love them, even if they're arguing. We always make sure our loved ones KNOW that we love them, and how much they mean to us. None of us believe you could ever tell someone you love them enough times, or too many.
If you think his “take care” was off….let me tell ya, hearin’ that from one, let alone BOTH parents, was an impossibility.
I think its an Irish Catholic pride thing
It's important to say it for sure but SAYING it is the easy part. L9ve is a verb. I have a family member who uses it as a filler. It doesn't really mean much in that context.
You’re VERY lucky!!
I grew up in family where my mother never told us I love you and my old man would only tell us when he was drunk and about ready to beat the hell out of my mom. Good times.
Sebastian does the best impression of digging I've ever seen lol.
Nate is the best on the list. Period.
This is exactly what we all need.
11:07 it only takes one night of poor sleep for me and I start thinking a stack of papers is a random cat that some how got in my house.
Bot
👏👏👏 Don't you love this guy? It's become one of my favorite comedians! 😅😂🤣
i just got my own place and realized i didnt have any ketchup 😭
My mother was so tired after having us that she genuinely woke up breastfeeding a pillow one night. This joke is spot on 😂 My mom was RIGHT THERE helping me because she remembered the chaos. Lol. ❤
Totally nailed it with adult children, Jim!!! Thank you❤
Thank you for this compilation😊
Damn Gaffigan cut deep. I gotta call my dad.
This was a perfect combo 😂🔥
Lmao my Mexican mother in law sounds like her Puerto Rican mother in law. Also the bit about Mark Anthony, and yes to Puerto Rico everywhere 😂
And bart somehow found a way to make the joke about himself being famous. Shocker.
16:21
Oh yeah. The olé "kicks of love."
All my faves 😂❤😂😂😂
cut the best Sugura joke in half...
I love the Ying yang beard on @TomSegura
16:48 you just called your mom the 'hottest being that ever lived'. Lol
Everyone hates on Bert but I like him and his comedy. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be his friend and hang out, Florida-Man is best observed from a distance, preferably with plexiglass or iron bars between you.
Shirt off = funny 😂 ??
Good for you for being easy to please you’ll get sick of him trust me
My cousin and i were looting my grandpa's attic for photographs and we found my grandma's noods. I'd successfully repressed that memory until i clicked this
Thank You for the laughs
Bert is more of a performer than a comedian
Bert is more of a moron than a comedian 😂😂
He just describes his life and laughs when the audience should laugh, then we all join in. It's a good time.
A good story teller rather than a comedian but that’s okay. He’s entertaining and people pay to be entertained
He's a fucking weirdo. Creepy as hell I can't look at him it's like looking at Jeffry Dahmer or some shit. I would never leave someone I know alone with bort. I can't figure what the thing is with him but his vibes are way off.
Everybody has ketchup it comes in houses 😂😂😂
The best of the best and the Bill burr the king
Gwyneth Paltrow and a cage fighter! 🤣
11:21 for parents. Truth!
Bill and Bert's were my favorite.
“Honestly really then what so why talking about it oksyyyy” is kinda a serve
Awesome compilation
Bill for the win
I don't know what happened to Nate parents 😂 but mine are in their 70's and still work, sharp mind, and cognitive
00:57 you're getting into some trouble, there, boy.
Edibles don’t work on me. I’m jealous. It’s crazy how some people can eat 10 mg and get high , I could eat 1000 mg with absolutely nothing? Something to do with enzymes from your liver ?
Me too. It’s lame…
It’s called being conscious wake up 😂
Smoking weed is better than edibles anyway, edibles don't do shit for me either other than helping me get a good night's sleep. I've been smoking weed for 47 years now
You ever try eating a chicken sandwich first? It needs fat to metabolize.
Yea 1000mg does absolutely nothing or, at most, puts me to sleep but I never get high. I do, however, trip super hard when I smoke...cigarettes...dipped in angel dust.
All Americans have coffee, ketchup, and mayo in their pantry, and either tacos, or chinese food!😂
great video post!
Taylor’s Tomlinson is one of the best female comics I’ve ever seen.
John Mullaneys childhood sounds like mine, son of a political editor and his proof reader
11:20 ON POINT KIDS
My grandparents never said I love you to any of us, not my parents or me. Never. They were both WWII vets. Nurse/ Sgt. They said, take care, never goodbye either, it was take care, see you later. Both sets did that. Weird.
ONE time! My grandmother said at my wedding reception. "I'm disappointed you HAVE to get married, but I still love you."
Funny comedians and bert
Great video
Comedians and Bert and Tom. Can't wait to see Burr in Detroit!
"Hometown Buffet 1998" 😅
I think a part of us cant stand our parents BECAUSE they brought us to this hell.
John Mulaney saying rocking twink so out there is surreal to me.
10:16: I had a boss tell me once that grandkids are a different ❤ & that she actually ❤ hers more than her actual kid's kid's & 🤷♀️ about this tho having kids wakens biology in ways nvr expected.😊 16:45: This is my daughter & nephew!! 👍 video for these are amazingly 😂 pple & I ❤ stand up bestest.😊😊❤
Your comment just confused the living shit out of me...
I got a double dose of liquid LSD. THE GUY PUT 1 DROP ON EVERYONES TONGUE. GOT TO ME AND PUT ALMOST THE WHOLE DYRINGE ON MY TONGUE. I WAS TRIPPIN SO HARD. I WAS SEEING SHIT MOVE IN THE SKY. BY 6 AM I WAS STILL HIGH. I WAS LIKE PRAYING TO GOD TO MAKE IT GO AWAY. LMFAO.
Bert rhymes with SHIRT! Wear one.
Tom and Bill on the GOATs list
6:19 I'm going to stop you right there and say if you didn't have your temper, you wouldn't have your wife, and so she better shut up and love it?
Bill and I must be related lmfao
I am trying to keep ketchup in the house! LOL!
If Tom and Bert are still friends, why isn’t Tom breaking the news to Bert about how funny he isn’t? Friends don’t let friends do stand up if one of the friends is hearing crickets.
Where's your friend?
You don't think Bert's funny, cool, alot of people dont, however his success, his sold out shows and his large fan base says that your opinion isn't fact, isn't that crazy?
@@alisab4811 Yes. That’s crazy. Thank you for pointing that out? How many Bert shows have you attended?
this comment gives retard.
Kevin is right kids swear, I remember saying Mother Fker when I was pretty young and my grandma heard me. I got in trouble. As an adult Fuk is my favorite word, so versitile.
Wtf would you be eating for christmas dinner that you would need ketchup for?
tourtiere which is a minced meat pie, I always use ketchup
Meatloaf
8:31 wow. Your dad WAS formal
Why are yall hating on bert? He's pretty funny
Nah
People don’t like him because there are a lot of clips of him acting very entitled and egotistical when he’s basically only known as “the machine guy”. He referred to people who aren’t comedians as ‘normal people’ and they seemed to rustle a lot of jimmies so now even clips that people used to like of his are getting a lot of hate now since people are scrutinizing his work since he thinks so highly of himself
When Bert told the “family as a unit” joke I immediately thought about Kevin Hart 👀
To be fair I've thought the same about my own family when out, so it's not crazy to think that 2 comedians thought of their family in that sense to use in a set
You could go to an alcoholics house and they would have ketchup😂
Might wanna keep that dollhouse handy Kev
Nice ❤
I’m somewhere between Bill Burr and John Malaney’s Dad.
4:01 THC naïve people can literally enjoy not having the recirculating thoughts. Doesn't take but one or two miss-doses to kick that sense of heaven out of your dome.
Bill burr is a legend!
Lmao i mega dosed my mother too 😂
Funniest shit i have ever been through
That's so weird. That's such an ass beatable offense you don't drug someone. Tom is suspect af to me for that and being friends with Bort. Bort most definitely has raped several ppl he's so creepy. Mark my words Borts career ends in orange jumpsuit. Don't copy things you see online. You need to rethink your life.
10:20 and I'd vote for you as president.
I think Tony Danza made a great T.V Dad for Sabastion
15:30 classic dad vibe.
Is Ali Wong just perpetually pregnant?😅
Hell No!!! The machine needs no shirt, the machine probably needs no clothing it's already a social manner he comes on with pants. Lol.. I couldn't imagine it'd be as comical with the shirt.. lol, he's one of the best fs