Yeah, I’ve developed trust issues because of it. The way the world works is just like the internet. Anyway can identify as anything so take what people say about themselves with a grain of salt.
@OmniNeon900 100%! It's really strange for someone my age (who was a teenager when the internet was in its infancy) to have to learn, understand, and adapt to how the internet has evolved and how people use it to mask themselves.
You forgot rage manipulation. It’s when someone is angry all the time and rages out so much that you walk on eggshells and give them their way because you don’t want to trigger their anger. I think rage manipulation is used way more than some of the ones you have on your list.
My step-dad did this a lot. My mom was a great manipulator (still is). Really fucked me up. I didn't leave my bedroom unless I was required to for like 5 years.
woah my friend did this but then they blame themselves for being offended or insensitive, making us feel guilty n sympathetic as they play the victim. Am i the asshole?
this is really good knowledge to have for SELF correction... a lot of people, myself included, do these things without even realizing they're doing it. With this knowledge, you can attempt to remove those sort of behaviors when you find yourself doing them.
I concur. I started watching this trying to see if some uses these topics on me. Then I saw some that I have used without even knowing. I’m all about self improvement. I know to check my emotions and explore the best way to express them. But I guess sometimes one concocts a way deal with hurt and keeping a relationship that’s manipulative. As I watched this video more I believe everyone has done one of these things in their life if they are honest with themselves
I got out of a narcissistic relationship a few months ago, and this video really put into perspective a lot of the techniques they used quite accurately. I think this is information a lot more people should be aware of.
it takes a lot to break free from a narcissistic relationship. It’s eye-opening to recognize those manipulation techniques-it really highlights how insidious they can be. I agree, spreading this knowledge can help others avoid similar situations and empower them to reclaim their lives. Wishing you strength and healing as you move forward!
@@hashtag_stop_twerking my sister used so many of these in our childhood to the point that I have become numb to these tactics .Its easy for me and some people to find these tricks. But sometimes people do it with such charisma you can't even tell.
I think these are manipulations that are used in everyday activities and some of them are used even without noticing ,even the one who manipulate here doesn't know what they are doing, its happens like a defense mechanism. But the problem began to unfold as one began to do this regularly or in great scheme level, other than that more than half of these are just human nature.
100%. So little of our interactions with others are even done fully consciously --- everyone has a social autopilot they can turn on, especially in conversations they want to escape.
In my thoughts everyone does all of this in a small healthy scale as we are social individuals. The problem is if someone finds comfort in using some of them heavily to get rid of problems or stress what leads to unhealthy amount of manipulation tactics. Then the user of those might have some other mental issues which lead to this
@@ЮлияКожеманова-э7в I think that may just be an evolutionary survival thing. In caveman times, kids would probably have to do whatever it takes to get their parents to feed them and keep them alive if they wanted to grow up and reproduce. Adults are also supposed to want to care for their children, but if situations got difficult and food was scarce, for example, they would have to do whatever it takes to get fed if they wanted to live. I’m guessing it’s a bit of an instinct, however nowadays it’s more often used to obtain toys and sugar.
@@ibinkyzTrust me it does 😂😂 Having an understanding gives you the upper hand at all times. The rich keep getting richer cause they always have an ace up their sleeves
Problem with this is that who's right and who's wrong can be tricky to find. Sure you can recognize the tactic, but is not always easy to find out whether it is actually genuine or if you are the one that's actually manipulating without realizing. Not to mention some of this tactics, like stonewalling, are not to manipulate others but to mantain our privacy or avoid conversations we know only lead to more stress and no solution. Pretty tough world we live in.
The devils usually in the details. You can typically communicate properly that you don't want to talk when a discussion is getting heated if you genuinely think its a good idea for both of you - and even if they don't like it in the moment, a good friend should still be understanding of that, and hopefully it will lead to proper communication in the long run. The problem arises when you do it too often, for no good reason or without explanation, because THEN it becomes a control tactic and uncaring for their perspective.
I just am anxious in general to speak/communicate with certain people so I tend to just dismiss or give them one word answers I never do it with people I already know well though...@@DodgeThatAttack
@@DodgeThatAttack that still brings up the question how do we recognize if they are manipulating, al we are doing is setting boundaries we aren’t sure of, these things are extremely hard to point out especially when they are subtle.
If you are manipulating someone without realizing it, then that’s your nature. If you would like to conquer this nature then you need to analyze what tactic you used, identify motives, and find out who you are.
Two things I took from this : A) I didnt know the exact definition of love bombing and upon not only hearing the definition but the exact scenario you explained, is quite literally something that happened to me! The look on my face, I gasped. I cannot believe that happened to me and its hard to tell sometimes when you're deep in it. You just don't realize, so this has brought a lot of clarity. B) The rest of it, I laughed because I pretty much experienced everything on here from my ex and like the situation above. I was too lost in my feels, too in love and wanted to make things work because I often thought I was the problem. When in the end, it was really them. Yeah some of us are not perfect, but I was at least able to accept my shortcommings. Good video! Lol.
Same. My ex mother did these to me as a kid too. And when I confronted her about cheating on my dad, she turned the tables back on me, accusing me of being a weekend whøre just for being r*ped in my teens and early 20’s. Freaking disgusting!!!
0:55 if anyone is thinking about watching Gaslight, do it, it’s a great classic movie and the plot is so much more than the husband dimming the gaslights. The wife hears strange noises coming from the attic of their home repeatedly and the gaslights dim and flicker each time this happens. There’s a huge mystery involved and the acting is really good.
Stonewalling and giving the silent treatment is often a good way to defuse a volatile situation, such as when a person with a choleric temperament is getting riled up and aggressive. Since there's no back-and-forth, there's nothing to "light the fuse" even further, and the conflict eventually dies down.
Perhaps, but you still have to communicate to your partner that you feel the conflict is a ticking time bomb and that it might be your own and their best interest to put the conversation on hold.
@@darksyner7682that doesn't always work. Ask someone who has a partner that requires intense therapy, even when I say I just need to take a break from this conversation I still get yelled at I still get mistreated in some way sometimes the silent treatment or stolen is the best way to avoid play conflict. In the end they play the victim card.
@@Crow2631 Nothing ever works 100% of the time. The goal is to try to diffuse the situation as calmly as possible. Telling your partner "Hey. I feel this conversation is starting to get tense and we might be one bad comment away from exploding. Can we please put this conversation on hold?" Is many many times better than just telling them "you need to calm down" or "You need anger management lessons". And speaking from someone who has been in a relationship where the other partner needed intense therapy. We were both told by a therapist to avoid accusatory language, and to communicate feelings through "I feel" statements. If all of that still fails and they explode on you or they play the victim card. That's on them and not you as a partner.
I just realized I got the silent treatment from a friend for who knows what reasons. That made me really depressed and question myself for over a month. I got over it, but since we're in the same class, I have to see them every day but I just stonewall myself because I'm always reminded of how emotionally unstable I was because of them, when they try to interact with me.
There has to be a reason behind the silent treatment. I used to do it, but only because i was anxious and afraid of responding to the person. He might be afraid to talk to you.
One of the amazing examples for blame shifting that i've encountered was: "We are both guilty of this" When I did something wrong - I am to blame. But when she does something wrong, I get - "Well you do it too / We are both guilty of this" Truly infuriating
A couple friends of mine did a lot of this to me. I believed we were on good terms until they started ghosting me and giving me the silent treatment. They played the victim to everyone else and basically made me a villain, they even went behind my back beforehand and seemingly convinced others enough for them to begin stonewalling me. I’d show interest and passion in conversation and I’d continuously get one word responses. The anxiety of the person who started it, it looks like she projected her feelings and attributed me to the reason. This video makes me realize how terrible of a person she is…
This is making me realize that the reason why I had no friends till I was grade 9 was because I was a horrible person. Thank fuck my friend of 22 years managed to stick with me long enough that they opened my eyes and truly changed how I treat others. I will admit that I'm still not the greatest person ever, but I like to believe that I've been doing better. I now have a lot of very kind friends who will stay with me and tell me off when I make a mistake, and will be proud of me when I take their lessons and put them to good use. I'm not the best, but I'm thankful that I've at least gotten better.
it's different. staying silent for an hour or two while you're steaming and thinking the problem through is okay, though disappearing and not responding to the person at all for a few days is the manipulation.
That's a different thing. If you go silent when you're angry and just try to calm down it's called normal human behaviour because you have a heart of gold and can't fathom shouting at someone. When someone does the silent treatment, you could live in the same apartement with that person and they could not talk to you for 3 months straight or more, just ignore you and not even acknowldege you're there. Oh and it can trigger for the pettiest of reasons like losing an argument or being told that something they did was annoying or offensive to you. They also sometimes just go away on "vacations" or travel without telling you prior just to spite you. I would know, my father does this when he's being petty, joke's on him he's going to the retirement home where he can be as far away from me and as silent as he wants to be, I mean that's what I interpreted when I was little, he just wants to be alone and not acknowledge me so wish granted.
Silent treatment is different from simply just needing time to process things. Silent treatment is emotionally punishing the person with intention of hurting them.
Then maybe you can tell them that you need some time to calm down and then you will come back to talk it, at least they’ll know why you are silent with them, I think that’s the point, not knowing why someone is going silenced (sorry for my English)
Everything that was shown in this video is part of why I don’t want to see my parents anymore. When I got big enough to defend myself from their spankings as a child, they resorted to fear and manipulation to get what they wanted out of me. The only reason why I haven’t left them yet as an adult is because of a financial predicament I’m in and I need to find a better job to completely support myself
completely understandable! When family members have not changed their ways after years of abusing/manipulating you, going back & forth between "I'm sorry, it won't happen again" to doing the exact same terrible sht, it's time to STONEWALL. Cut all ties, burn all bridges, and simply move on with life and leave them behind. I did, and I have no regrets. My only family contact is with my Aunt and one of her sons /my cousin who I am close to.
I myself am guilty of stonewalling and it is definitely a protection/defense mechanism. I grew up in an environment where expressing my emotions got me ridiculed and laughed at and as a result have developed vulnerability issues. It was helpful to see how my behavior is problematic and manipulative. It is something I need to work on to have more fulfilling relationships in my life.
Yes but be sure that youre not just dealing out of experience. I recognized that one with myself too. Mostly because ive been manipulated/cheated/taken advantage of enough times. So now at the slightest hint of those things i take distance from a person. As if im on alert. When I become somewhat certain someone is indeed up to no good or i indeed see that happening multiple times, i then suddenly stonewall. But i have to say i do that when im kind of done with the relationship already, at that point i dont care about communication. I see it as protecting myself from becoming hurt. Like knowing a when a pan is hot to not lay my fingers on it. We once got burned and now we know. Therefor i think this has to do with experience as well, and its about how/ when we use it. Obviously doing it to people whom we will still talk with later might not be the best idea
Im living with toxic roommates who do atleast 4 of these. You cant deal with them at all. when there's an argument they always lie, get agressive, switch blames and when the argument doesn't go their way they start degrading me, start to pull unnecessary things inside and get even more aggressive. Man Its so frustrating ☹️
If you're venting about a bad day, it's fine. If every day is a bad day and your issues never end, it can make the friend feel horrible for what isn't their fault. They shouldn't have a responsibility to comfort you, you should be responsible for yourself.
@@toomanyblocks8448unfortunately this is what I go through basically everyday, I constantly have to hear her stories about every single problem in her day and it’s so damn exhausting
Happened to me with an ex- online friend long ago. Little me got scammed out of a virtual rare item and I vented to my friend about it, she thought I was asking for her to give me one of her rare items and immediately kicked me out and blocked me. To this day, I have no regrets about being the type to see people at face value and always assume they're a good person until proven otherwise. It's okay to be afraid, but it's better to be kind. Remember; the best friends are the ones who stay, not the ones who'd rather be somewhere else. You deserve to be heard.
@@toomanyblocks8448 True, but Bug Lover has yet to provide context as to whether that was the case or not. Some people really are just set off by anything. I don't mean for this to sound like I'm disagreeing, I'm just worried that your message could come across as accusatory. That's just me who tends to overanalyze, though. Your input is still very much appreciated.
@@Deleted-User12535 Dear johnny, I am Sarah from grade 5, I am sorry to break it to u but I am sorry for blaming u for taking my homework. I forgot to do it. sorry again man
Let's not forget about the power of a little self-reflection in situations where one might be tempted to accuse others of these tactics: A person who is "Stonewalling" you _could_ be selfishly avoiding a meaningful conversation... or, they _could_ be trying to escape an uncomfortable interaction with you. In such cases, we should try to see whether our past communications would give them a _reason_ to be uncomfortable: are we often combative, emotional, or dismissive? Hopefully not, but possibly so.
Re: Mirroring -- Your definition is way too broad. Mirroring as a psychological tactic is generally limited to subconscious things: speaking pattern, tone, gestures, body language. It wouldn't include feigning the same interest in basketball, or a politician pretending to share the same life story.
Also I don’t think mirroring is always manipulation. Like if you looked up to someone you’d do more stuff that they do, or I feel if you just liked someone you might subconsciously find yourself gravitating towards stuff they do
@@gee3591 Well actually, "mirroring", as it's used in this context, _does_ mean manipulation. It's deliberately matching someone's body language, tone of voice, mannerisms, etc -- not because you look up to them, but because it's a proven strategy to disarm people and earn their trust. If they fold their arms at the table and lean in, you wait a beat, then do the same, etc. But this video defined mirroring in a way that makes what you say correct: By this video's definition, immitation-as-flattery or simply wanting to fit in would qualify as "mirroring", which isn't supposed to be the case.
0:32 those are kerosene lights. Gas lights work from the gas mains, originally used in street lighting but for a while in homes too before electricity became more common. Before the advent of electrical dimmers, there was no easy way to dim lights, but with gas lighting it was intrinsic to it (like you would regulate a stove). Hence how it could be used as a manipulation device.
@@CHERYL.1 not sure what you mean, kerosene lights were the common portable light source for decades before electric lighting became a thing. Practically every household had one, and they are still in use by the millions in Africa and Asia. The gas lighting which gave the practice its name worked on gas mains in a house and were much more of a luxury.
my problem w the general public learning behavioural psychology this way is that we live in a world of nuance. for instance if someone tells you something that makes you feel guilty that isn’t necessarily guilt tripping, people may misremember or forget things they said in the moment etc. although well meaning, content like this is just as likely to fuel obsessive compulsive behaviour or paranoia
Actually the story about the gaslighting is wrong. The term 'gaslighting' comes from a story about how a wife let the gas stove open for too long and the house went on fire and after getting evacuated from the house the wife convinced the husband it was his fault because he was the one who left the gas stove open for too long and not her. Hence the word 'gaslighting'. We learn new things everyday. The source is that I made it up.
I feel like this made up story illustrates a point that it's not always used as a long-term technique used to create a sense of dependency. It shows it can be used as a way to completely dismantle consequences/responsibility
We're different. I'm merely analyzing and interpreting manipulation tactics and dark psychology, all for being able to pinpoint manipulation when it happens, you know you'll only be able to manipulate a specific type of people, the more innocent that is
the explanation in this video is inaccurate, if you pay attention youll notice people mirror other people all the time, its in our instinct to mirror people we like (and maybe it gives that other person subconscious signal we like them), but i think the problem could be when somebody mirrors just in order to be liked, a manipulation tactic
@@blockarchitecture1102also sometimes people are just soo different they just domt commect with each other so mirroring consciously could help make relationship stronger
That is great! I think some of these can be done accidentally so good for you! Just don’t let your fear rule your life and remember that you are capable of being non-manipulative and a good person and you do do good stuff!
I think this video is very valuable because it makes us evaluate what we do. I have guilt tripped so much in my life, without realizing that I was manipulating. It's embarrassing. I guess every person manipulates more or less. Only saints never do it. But it can be unlearned by noticing it.
@@djentlover Yeah! And you can ask people that if you ever do this to let you know! I think everyone does something bad like this to a degree, and I also think that some of this can be a legitimate reaction without trying to be manipulative, so good for you for realizing! I think I am manipulative in certain ways too
something to realize is that some people who just unconsciously do behaviors similar to love-bombing and mirroring can also just be neurodivergent! im bad at gauging things you need to tell someone and things you should do for someone, for example, and oftentimes over or undershoot it unintentionally. i dont understand sociality _at all,_ and that's my personal experience with autism. i subconsciously might mirror some of another person just because deep down i need closer connections, too. if i hurt anyone, i will make it right. some things are just in peoples' nature
@@kanalmimi the whole point of my comment is that not everyone has bad intentions and its good to keep that in mind, even while also being cautious of real bad actors?
This is true but in my three year autistic-for-autistic relationship with my toxic ex, any time I would call them out for doing these toxic behaviors then they would say it is because they are autistic and didn't realize they were doing that. Ironically anytime I explained something I did that hurt their feelings by connecting it to a symptom of my autism, then they refused to accept that yet expected me to accept all their toxic behaviors or else I was being "ableist." My point is that you are correct, but there is also a limit, and, as an autistic person, I believe that you have to learn how to adjust your behaviors in order to integrate to neurotypical society because the reality is that the world is never going to truly accommodate you, and just because you did something wrong without knowing better does not make it ok.
You know what's even worse? Often, toxic and manipulative people also know all these terms, so they can use the little "system" of identifying the problem to their advantage and tag their victims with these terms.
Don't know why the algo popped up this in my feeds but I love it and *can shamefully admit that I use to do some of these manipulations listed here😅, sometime without knowing it. Now, I'm going to take care of myself by taking more care of other and their feelings and demand more responsibilities from myself😇.* By the way, got me as Subscriber🥰!
@silverpuppi1827 unfortunately ive been there, people who dont want to change or accept what they do is wrong gives you two options. 1 put up with it for the rest of your life and it will progressively get worse and worse and have catasrophic results on your education, career and relationships. Or option 2, cut them off when you get yourself into a situation where you no loger have to rely on them anymore. I had option 2 forced onto me, homelessness from age 16 which lasted 8 years, its been nearly 5 years since i was homeless and they destroyed my education and career prospects and i still have no contact with them. Ive managed to rebuild my entire life and get legitimate treatment for the CPTSD they forced onto me as they tried to pass down their generational cycle of abuse. It gets better but only when you want things to get better. From one stranger to another i wish you all the best and dont be afraid to reach out for help from qualified individuals/specialists.
What a horrible personality i have... even before reading anything about manipulating, i kept doing all of them in day to day life, now i understand how insufferable i am
@@windrunner2210 that actually means you are insightful and you care about being a good person and you're willing to admit when you're wrong, and all of that is pretty great, and if you have all those good traits already then you know you're not a horrible person who can never be good ever, so you know you have the capability to learn to interact with people in better ways! You might need to talk to people you trust about how you want to change your behavior or, I don't know, do research on how to stop manipulting peole or interpersonal effectiveness or something?
@NiennaFan1 thank you so much, someone finally noticed that im changing without sarcasm, it means a lot to me, and im working on it, changed so much in past few month❤
Reading comments like this makes me feel a little better because I often overthink that I’m not a nice person like I’m supposed to be. Like everybody else. It’s like, everybody is a good person but me. But on videos like these, I realize that there are people who are indeed like me. Maybe people just aren’t being honest in daily life. I don’t mean to be cringy but hey at least we’re not the only ones ^^ I hope you can better yourself no matter how many decades it might take.
@BabyFacedDolly don't push yourself too much, no one is perfect, even the best of people have their own flaws, you are what you meant to be, Changing yourself too much will be just pretending to be liked by others which can make you anxious or insecure... i wish you success❤️
Gaslighting example: Watching a group of people try to overthrow the United States government and then being told it was a day of love and not a big deal🤦🏾♂️
@@patrickjameskellyof9e415 oh no. He/we ended things months ago. And he blamed everything on me when our common friend asked. And I was gaslit into thinking it's my fault. So yeah no
I get that, my ex best friend did that to me. It absolutely broke me and now she’s trying to use triangulation on me but also dropped all her other friends, so instead she just says I’m racist to the 3 people who still tolerate her and anyone else she meets :)
It’s the worst when they do this in a situation where you are trapped in the same place with them. You start going crazy inside your head, people who are experts at silent treatment are so stubborn, they can sit next to you for hours without speaking a word and not give up to their commitment to be silent.
Gotta love watching this and realizing my very recent ex whom I was with for 3 years used pretty much all of these in a destructive manner. Gonna take a fair bit to heal, cheers for the info 👍
I think the worst part is the more aware and resistant you becone to manipulation, you realize how common it is. Then the real irony kicks in and you start to notice yourself subconsciously doing it to others, the struggle of being a human.
For me Guilt tripping = Projection = Blame shifting. It's different perspectives of the same thing. Silent treatment = Stonewalling, too. But I would say the others are acceptable as different manipulation tactics.
remember that things like lovebombing and mirroring are red flags, not red lights! some of these are manipulative no matter what but others can have valid reasons, so remember that you can have things that set off alarms without being a deal breaker on their own (red flags), things that set off alarms AND are deal breakers whether or not there are other issues (red lights), and things that dont set off alarms at all (green/beige flags)
@@VivienVarga-ki3sd A red flag is just a sign that the individual needs to be investigated if it is done maliciously or not. Its not an instant deal breaker. So calling mirroring a red flag is perfectly reasonable. There is a video called "that's a red flag? but I do that" that talks about this in more depth if you want more info.
@@VivienVarga-ki3sd exactly which is why it's not a red light. there are a lot of very valid reasons to do a lot of things that are often considered red flags and people consider different things red and green flags
Its good to know! Now I can recognize the manipulation taktiks and defend myself. I think everybody manipulated somebody in his life, without knowing. It is importent to recognize them and evoiding them to use.
Manipulation is not inherently bad. It's all about your intention behind it. Using it to set boundaries is ok. However, only using someone for your benefit will lead to trouble.
If you do bad things out of fear, you are still doing bad things. Don’t do it. It’s a manipulative lie to “mask” or whatever newspeak nonsense you’re calling it.
This is a mediocore story , about my childhood , but i Guarantee you that you will gain new insigts from my experiences Bro summarized my most of the childhood , But i think if you know behind the scenes whats causing them to act like that , and what is your aim ,then you just dont care much about these tactics and just directly ask them in a logical sentence Thats why i like science and Maths ,they exactly tell you what ,why & how without any B.S. tacts , But yeah it was true i was acconted for something very horrible which i didnt do in 5th grade ,and i cried for like 2 days straight ,the amount of stress it created when i went to home given i was the topper of my class ,but still those kids blamed me ,anyway i realized my mistakes ,crying or sobing wont do you any good ,the only thing which will remain always true is Logic and maths ,no one can emotionally attack it and if you can prove something with math then its done ,its like embedded on a stone ,nobody cant deny it, But judging on the base that everyone pointing finger at me that i have done it ,without considering the possiblity of me getting framed is just injustice ,well helpless me ,but i think that incedent indeed made me think and approach anything very cautiosly and differently and finally now i know all the reasons and logic behind all tactics and all upcoming future tacts , And i think it really pushed my thinking abilities ,as i speak with so much certainity now ,I also liked the buddist practice like how they have a another subject to takle all those thought and that too with maximum efficiecy ,But still i am not able to find a pure innocent hardworking soul ,and from that day in 5th grade i decided to do whatever it takes to become so powerful in all physical ,mental , financial and the only dream i have is to be able to solve and help any innocent hardworking person suffering coz of those MFs , I hope if anyone reads it then please atleast dont belame someone for things that hadnt even done, Atleast not a child please! 🙏
gossssh my hs ex was so good at manipulation in general and gaslighting specifically that TO THIS DAY i doubt whether or not i was actually gaslit. insane.
Good, they are denying you that gratification of actually manipulating them and stopping you dead in your tracks. If you want to stay friends with them I would advise you go to a therapist with this because it's neither funny nor normal.
How to handle guilt tripping: If someone is talking about sad stuff, and is talking to you about it, then there’s a chance they actually are genuinely in need of help! So don’t assume they’re trying to manipulate you just yet.
However, that's not saying how to handle guilt tripping. That's saying to give them a chance, but not actually the way to handle guilt tripping. Maybe I'm misunderstanding the point of your comment, though.
i know silent treatment is another way to manipulate people but in my case, i would use silent treatment to people i no longer want to communicate with, especially when I'm mad, upset or sad, because I don't want to hurt them with the words i wanted to say, cause once i snap i wouldn't be able to hold back my mouth from running. and i would need some time to cool down before talking to them again. i guess it's just my defense mechanism to protect myself and people around me to prevent more conflicts. but i know that i should communicate better and I'm currently working on that.
It's not "playing the victim", it's acknowledging that we were raised by dysfunctional people and doing something to change our own behavior in response to their effect on our psyche
My dad pulls the guilt tripping thing with me a lot, ever since I was five. Over time I learned that not caring or making it seem like I don’t care about how he felt was the way to go. So, if I decide to get up and leave the room for example, and he says, “Well, I guess you don’t appreciate my company.” I’ll say something along the lines of, “What took you so long to figure *that* out?” then remind him of all the times he’s made me feel worthless all because he was just cranky.
1:06 her face isn't exactly realistic. my mother and people around me constantly gaslight me. lots of people in society do so, sadly. but it's not some evil grin thing. they may not even realize they're doing it. that's actually probably the case most times.
Damn this hurt to hear ngl I got a big ass heart and always give ppl chances and got pure intentions but realizing now I've been treated alot of these ways my entire life... cold world man fr
With silent treatment I'm glad that extreme example at end was there because I feel it can be easy to misconstrue someone dealing with things with being toxic.
You didn't mention gaslighting.
Literally the first one
@@LewisBrittenCompletely false. The first one is guilt tripping
@@SkvelaPolevka rewatch the video from the start!
@@LewisBrittenyou obviously didn’t watch the video it doesn’t mention gaslighting
@@LewisBrittennope. Gaslighting isn’t in this video
Some ppl are rly good at making this stuff “normal” or “not a big deal” 😢
you wont know why i started a war in the replies
@@paridhaxholliaaaaaaaand you just gaslighted this person.
Yeah it is scary how normalized this really harmful behavior is. It’s verbal and mental abuse without you realizing it.
Yeah, I’ve developed trust issues because of it. The way the world works is just like the internet. Anyway can identify as anything so take what people say about themselves with a grain of salt.
@OmniNeon900 100%! It's really strange for someone my age (who was a teenager when the internet was in its infancy) to have to learn, understand, and adapt to how the internet has evolved and how people use it to mask themselves.
You forgot rage manipulation. It’s when someone is angry all the time and rages out so much that you walk on eggshells and give them their way because you don’t want to trigger their anger. I think rage manipulation is used way more than some of the ones you have on your list.
Yep. Alcoholic father basic skill
I live with one of these. Ugh!
My step-dad did this a lot. My mom was a great manipulator (still is).
Really fucked me up. I didn't leave my bedroom unless I was required to for like 5 years.
Love withdral is crazy too😭💔
woah my friend did this but then they blame themselves for being offended or insensitive, making us feel guilty n sympathetic as they play the victim. Am i the asshole?
this is really good knowledge to have for SELF correction... a lot of people, myself included, do these things without even realizing they're doing it. With this knowledge, you can attempt to remove those sort of behaviors when you find yourself doing them.
True I get somehow guilty watching this knowing I never had bad intentions with anybody
THIS
I didn't know about some of the manipulations in this video. Now I will use at least half of them.
@@eod8785so what? It won't work on me, because I have gathered protective knowledge
I concur. I started watching this trying to see if some uses these topics on me. Then I saw some that I have used without even knowing. I’m all about self improvement. I know to check my emotions and explore the best way to express them. But I guess sometimes one concocts a way deal with hurt and keeping a relationship that’s manipulative. As I watched this video more I believe everyone has done one of these things in their life if they are honest with themselves
Time stamps:
1. Gaslighting ( 00:00 )
2. Guilt tripping ( 01:37 )
3. Love bombing ( 02:55 )
4. Silent treatment ( 04:23 )
5. Triangulation ( 05:50 )
6. Projection ( 07:20 )
7. Blame shifting ( 08:30 )
8. Playing the victim ( 10:00 )
9. Stonewalling ( 11:30 )
10. Mirroring ( 12:54 )
11. Love withdrawal ( 14:16 )
Thank you
dude gaslighting is the second in the video not the first
@MrLocust4 No it's first watch the video again
@@Kitysgachaiquit Oh I guess u don't want to hear our voices 😢
@@Kitysgachaiquit it’s literally second. stop being crazy 😅
I got out of a narcissistic relationship a few months ago, and this video really put into perspective a lot of the techniques they used quite accurately.
I think this is information a lot more people should be aware of.
omg me too! Once again I realized that I collected all the tricks. combo((
it takes a lot to break free from a narcissistic relationship. It’s eye-opening to recognize those manipulation techniques-it really highlights how insidious they can be. I agree, spreading this knowledge can help others avoid similar situations and empower them to reclaim their lives. Wishing you strength and healing as you move forward!
They can't break me anymore.
And I just realised I've been manupilated in so many ways
I have accidentally manipulated people so many times. I just need time when I get mad, okay? I'm sorry! 😢
Real
@@hashtag_stop_twerking my sister used so many of these in our childhood to the point that I have become numb to these tactics .Its easy for me and some people to find these tricks. But sometimes people do it with such charisma you can't even tell.
SAME 💀💀💀💀
*Actually in all the ways 😂
I think these are manipulations that are used in everyday activities and some of them are used even without noticing ,even the one who manipulate here doesn't know what they are doing, its happens like a defense mechanism.
But the problem began to unfold as one began to do this regularly or in great scheme level, other than that more than half of these are just human nature.
100%. So little of our interactions with others are even done fully consciously --- everyone has a social autopilot they can turn on, especially in conversations they want to escape.
I just noticed that a lot of kids are unintentionally manipulative... They just want to avoid the stress.
In my thoughts everyone does all of this in a small healthy scale as we are social individuals. The problem is if someone finds comfort in using some of them heavily to get rid of problems or stress what leads to unhealthy amount of manipulation tactics. Then the user of those might have some other mental issues which lead to this
@@ЮлияКожеманова-э7в I think that may just be an evolutionary survival thing. In caveman times, kids would probably have to do whatever it takes to get their parents to feed them and keep them alive if they wanted to grow up and reproduce. Adults are also supposed to want to care for their children, but if situations got difficult and food was scarce, for example, they would have to do whatever it takes to get fed if they wanted to live. I’m guessing it’s a bit of an instinct, however nowadays it’s more often used to obtain toys and sugar.
@@ЮлияКожеманова-э7вsurvival 101
Thanks for the guide, now i can control people better
Knowing how a game is played doesn't makes you a good player.
@@ibinkyzTrust me it does 😂😂
Having an understanding gives you the upper hand at all times. The rich keep getting richer cause they always have an ace up their sleeves
U cant
@@real_glitchy (Gaslighting gaslighting gaslighting)
I used to be happy
Now i just wanna suicide bcz of how much everyone manipulates me. It’s evil and the whole world in reality is
You posted this video right after I ended a friendship that used almost all of these. Now I know that I definitely should have gotten out of there
People always use triangulation on me to bully me
jesus dude. good for you, get the hell outta there! hope you find better friends soon ❤
@@Hashe-d6q use it back at them, call your friends
@@Hashe-d6q same some people use it on my friend
@@Hashe-d6q the best way to escape it is to use some of these tricks your self. Fight fire with fire and make the user doubt himself.
Problem with this is that who's right and who's wrong can be tricky to find.
Sure you can recognize the tactic, but is not always easy to find out whether it is actually genuine or if you are the one that's actually manipulating without realizing. Not to mention some of this tactics, like stonewalling, are not to manipulate others but to mantain our privacy or avoid conversations we know only lead to more stress and no solution.
Pretty tough world we live in.
The devils usually in the details.
You can typically communicate properly that you don't want to talk when a discussion is getting heated if you genuinely think its a good idea for both of you - and even if they don't like it in the moment, a good friend should still be understanding of that, and hopefully it will lead to proper communication in the long run.
The problem arises when you do it too often, for no good reason or without explanation, because THEN it becomes a control tactic and uncaring for their perspective.
I just am anxious in general to speak/communicate with certain people so I tend to just dismiss or give them one word answers
I never do it with people I already know well though...@@DodgeThatAttack
@@DodgeThatAttack that still brings up the question how do we recognize if they are manipulating, al we are doing is setting boundaries we aren’t sure of, these things are extremely hard to point out especially when they are subtle.
If you are manipulating someone without realizing it, then that’s your nature. If you would like
to conquer this nature then you need to analyze what tactic you used, identify motives, and find out who you are.
Easy: The man is right, the woman is wrong.
Two things I took from this :
A) I didnt know the exact definition of love bombing and upon not only hearing the definition but the exact scenario you explained, is quite literally something that happened to me! The look on my face, I gasped. I cannot believe that happened to me and its hard to tell sometimes when you're deep in it. You just don't realize, so this has brought a lot of clarity.
B) The rest of it, I laughed because I pretty much experienced everything on here from my ex and like the situation above. I was too lost in my feels, too in love and wanted to make things work because I often thought I was the problem. When in the end, it was really them. Yeah some of us are not perfect, but I was at least able to accept my shortcommings.
Good video! Lol.
Crazy how moms use all of these on the regular
u ok?
@@lazuliisanidiotNo
Yep and then she s sayin ur the manipulator even tho she s one... crazzzy
Same. My ex mother did these to me as a kid too. And when I confronted her about cheating on my dad, she turned the tables back on me, accusing me of being a weekend whøre just for being r*ped in my teens and early 20’s. Freaking disgusting!!!
@@MxPotato84ok that's actually fucked up. Are you okay?
0:55 if anyone is thinking about watching Gaslight, do it, it’s a great classic movie and the plot is so much more than the husband dimming the gaslights. The wife hears strange noises coming from the attic of their home repeatedly and the gaslights dim and flicker each time this happens. There’s a huge mystery involved and the acting is really good.
Thank you for this comment now I want to see the movie, wouldn't have thought about it otherwise! ❤
I watched it last month and I loved it. I definitely second this recommendation
I was thinking abt watching that!
It's mandatory for politicians to learn all of these
Politics in a nutshell 😭
they also gain influence through crowd seduction within their speeches n stuff like that
Him: "That's what gaslighting is,"
Me: "No it's not."
I see what you're doing. Gonna let someone else take it though
@@Luci_the_Demon I'm not doing anything.
@@Luci_the_DemonDoing what? Are you okay there buddy?
@@johnemmanuelbartholomewOkay? I've always been okay, don't know what's your problem.
@@CalW44haha
me knowing every one of them because of my mama : "thanks mom"
Same here, just with my dad.
My mom too but never anything serious, I love her 💖
I know how you feel 🫂
Same :/
r u ok?
choose your character:
stonewalling after my pet hamster finds my mayonaise sock, I choose YOU!
Stonewalling and giving the silent treatment is often a good way to defuse a volatile situation, such as when a person with a choleric temperament is getting riled up and aggressive. Since there's no back-and-forth, there's nothing to "light the fuse" even further, and the conflict eventually dies down.
This definitely couldn't go horribly wrong
Perhaps, but you still have to communicate to your partner that you feel the conflict is a ticking time bomb and that it might be your own and their best interest to put the conversation on hold.
@@darksyner7682that doesn't always work. Ask someone who has a partner that requires intense therapy, even when I say I just need to take a break from this conversation I still get yelled at I still get mistreated in some way sometimes the silent treatment or stolen is the best way to avoid play conflict. In the end they play the victim card.
@@Crow2631 Nothing ever works 100% of the time. The goal is to try to diffuse the situation as calmly as possible. Telling your partner "Hey. I feel this conversation is starting to get tense and we might be one bad comment away from exploding. Can we please put this conversation on hold?" Is many many times better than just telling them "you need to calm down" or "You need anger management lessons". And speaking from someone who has been in a relationship where the other partner needed intense therapy. We were both told by a therapist to avoid accusatory language, and to communicate feelings through "I feel" statements. If all of that still fails and they explode on you or they play the victim card. That's on them and not you as a partner.
get urself better business partners that don't need therapy lol
Somebody once accused me of gaslighting. I told him, "That's crazy!".
💀
Babe what are you talking about that’s not even a word
gaslighting isn't real, you're all just crazy
@@blad33s9/10 gaslight
u think ur cool
I just realized I got the silent treatment from a friend for who knows what reasons.
That made me really depressed and question myself for over a month.
I got over it, but since we're in the same class, I have to see them every day but I just stonewall myself because I'm always reminded of how emotionally unstable I was because of them, when they try to interact with me.
There has to be a reason behind the silent treatment. I used to do it, but only because i was anxious and afraid of responding to the person. He might be afraid to talk to you.
One of the amazing examples for blame shifting that i've encountered was: "We are both guilty of this"
When I did something wrong - I am to blame.
But when she does something wrong, I get - "Well you do it too / We are both guilty of this"
Truly infuriating
I do the opposite. I like not chasing who to blame but instead focusing on solving the problem
More like "you're the reason why you made me do this"
Hit her with the “where this may be true, this isn’t the topic at hand. You did xyz and I’d like you to take accountability for it”
I just realized I do the silent treatment by accident
Same
Now you got a chance to stop doing it
Yeah I do it so I don't say things in anger I only start talking when I'm calmed down
@@ballzsack1640 how I want to change
you must remove that habit of urs
0:26 no it’s not you don’t even know what gaslighting is
What is it then?
@@Pulak_Plays bro, I’m gaslighting the video get a brain
@@liamking4180 you're a genius lmaoo
@@liamking4180😂😂😂
It’s gas lamping are you crazy
Gaslight
Gatekeep
Greg Hefley
DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MENTIONED❗❗🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
and rowley
Maturing is knowing that book series is about a kid growing into an asshole.
@@TyrannoWright
Wasn't he already?
@@mauro27279 ...Pretty much.
Best way to deal with guilt tripping
-ok
-womp womp
Womp womp in big 2024 September 💔
Or "quit whining"
Or even more agressive “Im calling 911 it seems like you need a wa wa wa wambulance
@@TrulyFailedReal haven’t heard that one in a while
Tbh this are counter manipulation tactic
A couple friends of mine did a lot of this to me. I believed we were on good terms until they started ghosting me and giving me the silent treatment. They played the victim to everyone else and basically made me a villain, they even went behind my back beforehand and seemingly convinced others enough for them to begin stonewalling me. I’d show interest and passion in conversation and I’d continuously get one word responses. The anxiety of the person who started it, it looks like she projected her feelings and attributed me to the reason. This video makes me realize how terrible of a person she is…
This is making me realize that the reason why I had no friends till I was grade 9 was because I was a horrible person.
Thank fuck my friend of 22 years managed to stick with me long enough that they opened my eyes and truly changed how I treat others.
I will admit that I'm still not the greatest person ever, but I like to believe that I've been doing better. I now have a lot of very kind friends who will stay with me and tell me off when I make a mistake, and will be proud of me when I take their lessons and put them to good use.
I'm not the best, but I'm thankful that I've at least gotten better.
curious about any possivle reasons to the way you were and how?
@@birdbeakbeardneck3617 possibly not being called out on these behaviours as a child (sorry if I'm wrong, that's just commonly how it happens)
Look up emotional intelligence
W
@@MimiTheStudent Congratulations!!!!!!!!! And congratulations to your friend!
didn’t think going silent was manipulative. i usually do it to avoid saying some bad things while i’m still angry
This literally all of this. I can be a BIIIITCH when I'm angry . If I genuinely care it's best if I stay silent. You can't take certain things back.
it's different. staying silent for an hour or two while you're steaming and thinking the problem through is okay, though disappearing and not responding to the person at all for a few days is the manipulation.
That's a different thing.
If you go silent when you're angry and just try to calm down it's called normal human behaviour because you have a heart of gold and can't fathom shouting at someone.
When someone does the silent treatment, you could live in the same apartement with that person and they could not talk to you for 3 months straight or more, just ignore you and not even acknowldege you're there. Oh and it can trigger for the pettiest of reasons like losing an argument or being told that something they did was annoying or offensive to you. They also sometimes just go away on "vacations" or travel without telling you prior just to spite you.
I would know, my father does this when he's being petty, joke's on him he's going to the retirement home where he can be as far away from me and as silent as he wants to be, I mean that's what I interpreted when I was little, he just wants to be alone and not acknowledge me so wish granted.
Silent treatment is different from simply just needing time to process things. Silent treatment is emotionally punishing the person with intention of hurting them.
Then maybe you can tell them that you need some time to calm down and then you will come back to talk it, at least they’ll know why you are silent with them, I think that’s the point, not knowing why someone is going silenced (sorry for my English)
Silent treatment while being an overthinker ate me up. It was horrible, and you never know when it ends.
Everything that was shown in this video is part of why I don’t want to see my parents anymore. When I got big enough to defend myself from their spankings as a child, they resorted to fear and manipulation to get what they wanted out of me. The only reason why I haven’t left them yet as an adult is because of a financial predicament I’m in and I need to find a better job to completely support myself
completely understandable! When family members have not changed their ways after years of abusing/manipulating you, going back & forth between "I'm sorry, it won't happen again" to doing the exact same terrible sht, it's time to STONEWALL. Cut all ties, burn all bridges, and simply move on with life and leave them behind. I did, and I have no regrets. My only family contact is with my Aunt and one of her sons /my cousin who I am close to.
Your comment is ironic given this video
I myself am guilty of stonewalling and it is definitely a protection/defense mechanism. I grew up in an environment where expressing my emotions got me ridiculed and laughed at and as a result have developed vulnerability issues. It was helpful to see how my behavior is problematic and manipulative. It is something I need to work on to have more fulfilling relationships in my life.
Yes but be sure that youre not just dealing out of experience. I recognized that one with myself too. Mostly because ive been manipulated/cheated/taken advantage of enough times. So now at the slightest hint of those things i take distance from a person. As if im on alert. When I become somewhat certain someone is indeed up to no good or i indeed see that happening multiple times, i then suddenly stonewall. But i have to say i do that when im kind of done with the relationship already, at that point i dont care about communication. I see it as protecting myself from becoming hurt. Like knowing a when a pan is hot to not lay my fingers on it. We once got burned and now we know. Therefor i think this has to do with experience as well, and its about how/ when we use it. Obviously doing it to people whom we will still talk with later might not be the best idea
You are playing the victim there tho.. Jk
@@andremarques1088 I mean, I am. But I'm also taking personal accountability for my behavior so it evens out 😂
@@Dewibop ye I had the same thought process 😅
Its good that you reflect you self. We aren't perfect, but you can work on that ! Great ❤
Im living with toxic roommates who do atleast 4 of these. You cant deal with them at all. when there's an argument they always lie, get agressive, switch blames and when the argument doesn't go their way they start degrading me, start to pull unnecessary things inside and get even more aggressive. Man Its so frustrating ☹️
You need to move.
10:00 Basically 97.5% of all RUclips apology videos
toxic gossip trains
(edited bc i said gossip toxic trains)
@@cirnotheartist their not a groomer, just a loser (their actually both)
colleen (whatever tf her last name is) 😂😂
@@salt4821 shes named colleen ballsack i think
@@salt4821 IDK either, Colleen Badger or something
my biggest fear is me venting to someone and them thinking i'm manipulating them 😦
If you're venting about a bad day, it's fine. If every day is a bad day and your issues never end, it can make the friend feel horrible for what isn't their fault. They shouldn't have a responsibility to comfort you, you should be responsible for yourself.
@@toomanyblocks8448unfortunately this is what I go through basically everyday, I constantly have to hear her stories about every single problem in her day and it’s so damn exhausting
Sounds like something a therapist can do
Happened to me with an ex- online friend long ago. Little me got scammed out of a virtual rare item and I vented to my friend about it, she thought I was asking for her to give me one of her rare items and immediately kicked me out and blocked me. To this day, I have no regrets about being the type to see people at face value and always assume they're a good person until proven otherwise. It's okay to be afraid, but it's better to be kind.
Remember; the best friends are the ones who stay, not the ones who'd rather be somewhere else. You deserve to be heard.
@@toomanyblocks8448 True, but Bug Lover has yet to provide context as to whether that was the case or not. Some people really are just set off by anything. I don't mean for this to sound like I'm disagreeing, I'm just worried that your message could come across as accusatory. That's just me who tends to overanalyze, though. Your input is still very much appreciated.
Time stamps:
Intro 0:00
1. Guilt tripping 1:37
2. Love bombing 2:55
3. Silent treatment 4:23
4. Triangulation 5:50
5. Projection 7:20
6. Blame shifting 8:30
7. Playing the victim 10:00
8. Stonewalling 11:30
9. Mirroring 12:54
10. Love withdrawal 14:16
Love bomber baby, you took my heart
Silent treatment is manipulative damn Ive been manipulator all my life sorry Johnny from grade 2
Dear Sebastian,
I am Johnny , from grade 2 . I just want to let you know that I gaslit you into thinking you're the one manipulating me , I'm so sorry
Is it actually johnny
@@MephonelovesCookies are you kidding
@@abdulnourr-Habibi Idk :D
@@Deleted-User12535 Dear johnny,
I am Sarah from grade 5, I am sorry to break it to u but I am sorry for blaming u for taking my homework. I forgot to do it. sorry again man
My ex girlfriend literally did every single of these and shes a cop totally tragic and ironic.
Who asked
Look a white knight @@dumptruck_babs
@@dumptruck_babs I did, now go cry somewhere else
This is the internet
are you okay now?
i mean what did you expect dating a cop. Nah fr tho manipulators suck I'm sorry you had to go through that
1990: "Deal with a bully by ignoring them."
2024: "Ignoring someone is a manipulation tactic."
I just can't win.
You r dumb bruh its not how it works
Lets go gambling reference?
@@Paintballperson-k2law dang it
Let's not forget about the power of a little self-reflection in situations where one might be tempted to accuse others of these tactics: A person who is "Stonewalling" you _could_ be selfishly avoiding a meaningful conversation... or, they _could_ be trying to escape an uncomfortable interaction with you. In such cases, we should try to see whether our past communications would give them a _reason_ to be uncomfortable: are we often combative, emotional, or dismissive? Hopefully not, but possibly so.
Shift blaming are we?
@@ArashiNGHTMR Not a fan of self-reflection, are we?
@@eunomiac hehehe I love being a hypocrite it's funni
I accidentally stonewall people a lot cause I’m autistic and get overstimulated easily
This video is really good but there are many many oversights and over simplifications
Re: Mirroring -- Your definition is way too broad. Mirroring as a psychological tactic is generally limited to subconscious things: speaking pattern, tone, gestures, body language. It wouldn't include feigning the same interest in basketball, or a politician pretending to share the same life story.
Exactly!! Thank you for your comment.
What he is talking about is better referred as "imitation" than mirroring.
I would also like to add that he missed two dark tactics: White knight and moving the goal-post
Also I don’t think mirroring is always manipulation. Like if you looked up to someone you’d do more stuff that they do, or I feel if you just liked someone you might subconsciously find yourself gravitating towards stuff they do
@@gee3591 Well actually, "mirroring", as it's used in this context, _does_ mean manipulation. It's deliberately matching someone's body language, tone of voice, mannerisms, etc -- not because you look up to them, but because it's a proven strategy to disarm people and earn their trust. If they fold their arms at the table and lean in, you wait a beat, then do the same, etc. But this video defined mirroring in a way that makes what you say correct: By this video's definition, immitation-as-flattery or simply wanting to fit in would qualify as "mirroring", which isn't supposed to be the case.
@@eunomiac so is it always intentional?
Lovebombing and withdrawal are one of the most dangerous manipulation combos
Who has enough money to do this shit. It's expensive wtf
@@pazeros6424 u don’t gotta do gifts to love bomb, just affection and withdrawal
@@pazeros6424 they can do it in other ways though, like giving them alot of attention and love.
Thanks man this video really helped me become a better manipulator
Truly inspiring indeed
Nen manipulator
“ a better manipulator “ shut up, manipulation ain’t real and you know it, it was just made up by big pharma
lol
No it didn't, you feel more vulnerable now.
0:32 those are kerosene lights. Gas lights work from the gas mains, originally used in street lighting but for a while in homes too before electricity became more common. Before the advent of electrical dimmers, there was no easy way to dim lights, but with gas lighting it was intrinsic to it (like you would regulate a stove). Hence how it could be used as a manipulation device.
im confused
🤓
No it's not your acting crazy
kerosene lights were actually expensive and rare btw. so techically this tactic is only for rich people.
@@CHERYL.1 not sure what you mean, kerosene lights were the common portable light source for decades before electric lighting became a thing. Practically every household had one, and they are still in use by the millions in Africa and Asia. The gas lighting which gave the practice its name worked on gas mains in a house and were much more of a luxury.
my problem w the general public learning behavioural psychology this way is that we live in a world of nuance. for instance if someone tells you something that makes you feel guilty that isn’t necessarily guilt tripping, people may misremember or forget things they said in the moment etc. although well meaning, content like this is just as likely to fuel obsessive compulsive behaviour or paranoia
Actually the story about the gaslighting is wrong. The term 'gaslighting' comes from a story about how a wife let the gas stove open for too long and the house went on fire and after getting evacuated from the house the wife convinced the husband it was his fault because he was the one who left the gas stove open for too long and not her. Hence the word 'gaslighting'. We learn new things everyday. The source is that I made it up.
good one
Quandale dingle
I feel like this made up story illustrates a point that it's not always used as a long-term technique used to create a sense of dependency. It shows it can be used as a way to completely dismantle consequences/responsibility
Was about to believe that until you said your last line . Good one , you just gaslighted me
Real
We're becoming Master Manipulators with this one.
Yessuhhhh
Yeah...until it all comes back at ya. I wouldnt do it.
Eugh it stinks
We're different. I'm merely analyzing and interpreting manipulation tactics and dark psychology, all for being able to pinpoint manipulation when it happens, you know you'll only be able to manipulate a specific type of people, the more innocent that is
@@MedKad2 it's just a joke. 💀
This channel caused me a lot of issues, including a broken leg 26 years ago.
Y?
2 weeks still no answer. Obviously lying because he doesn't like their tactics being exposed
@@hazeno1thomasand given the fact youtubes only 19 years old
🤷♂️
And 17 morons liked and believed his lies at face value Instead of waiting for any proof or verification.
No way, i mirror every time i'm with a likeable person
I HAVE NO PERSONALITY😭
the explanation in this video is inaccurate, if you pay attention youll notice people mirror other people all the time, its in our instinct to mirror people we like (and maybe it gives that other person subconscious signal we like them), but i think the problem could be when somebody mirrors just in order to be liked, a manipulation tactic
@@blockarchitecture1102also sometimes people are just soo different they just domt commect with each other so mirroring consciously could help make relationship stronger
well you could try mirroring other people you already have mirrored before instead of the actual person infront. Like,yea
You could also be neurodivergent
Nah you're just a chamechamechamechamechamechameleon. They come and go.🤷🏽
im not sure if this makes sense but im afraid of being (accidentally?) manipulative so imma keep these in mind
That is great! I think some of these can be done accidentally so good for you! Just don’t let your fear rule your life and remember that you are capable of being non-manipulative and a good person and you do do good stuff!
@@NiennaFan1
I think this video is very valuable because it makes us evaluate what we do. I have guilt tripped so much in my life, without realizing that I was manipulating. It's embarrassing. I guess every person manipulates more or less. Only saints never do it. But it can be unlearned by noticing it.
@@djentlover Yeah! And you can ask people that if you ever do this to let you know! I think everyone does something bad like this to a degree, and I also think that some of this can be a legitimate reaction without trying to be manipulative, so good for you for realizing! I think I am manipulative in certain ways too
@@djentlover great on you for realizing my friend you got this
Thanks for the free lesson, now i am equipped to become an effective politician.
trump
its not gaslighting its gaslamping gaslighting doesn't exist
haha you're funny
You're trying to gaslight me, i get it
Your right... Did you just gaslamp me?
@@paridhaxhollidude. No. Also its gaslamp not gaslight
@@Some_Kid11no it’s gaslighting
The dudes that bullied me in middle school kept on using the “playing the victim” tactic bruh 😭
now that the term is more normalized, some gaslighters try to gaslight you by accusing YOU of gaslighting them.
stop gaslighting me, you gaslighter.
something to realize is that some people who just unconsciously do behaviors similar to love-bombing and mirroring can also just be neurodivergent! im bad at gauging things you need to tell someone and things you should do for someone, for example, and oftentimes over or undershoot it unintentionally. i dont understand sociality _at all,_ and that's my personal experience with autism. i subconsciously might mirror some of another person just because deep down i need closer connections, too. if i hurt anyone, i will make it right. some things are just in peoples' nature
If you do it without bad intentions then maybe
@@kanalmimi the whole point of my comment is that not everyone has bad intentions and its good to keep that in mind, even while also being cautious of real bad actors?
Take responsibility for your subconscious actions, period
loatheweb how can you take responsibility for something you cannot control? That makes no sense.. Also every mirrors people
This is true but in my three year autistic-for-autistic relationship with my toxic ex, any time I would call them out for doing these toxic behaviors then they would say it is because they are autistic and didn't realize they were doing that. Ironically anytime I explained something I did that hurt their feelings by connecting it to a symptom of my autism, then they refused to accept that yet expected me to accept all their toxic behaviors or else I was being "ableist."
My point is that you are correct, but there is also a limit, and, as an autistic person, I believe that you have to learn how to adjust your behaviors in order to integrate to neurotypical society because the reality is that the world is never going to truly accommodate you, and just because you did something wrong without knowing better does not make it ok.
You know what's even worse? Often, toxic and manipulative people also know all these terms, so they can use the little "system" of identifying the problem to their advantage and tag their victims with these terms.
Don't know why the algo popped up this in my feeds but I love it and *can shamefully admit that I use to do some of these manipulations listed here😅, sometime without knowing it. Now, I'm going to take care of myself by taking more care of other and their feelings and demand more responsibilities from myself😇.*
By the way, got me as Subscriber🥰!
My parents used all of these manipulation tactics. I can’t express how I feel about them, or else they’ll just pin the blame on me or play the victim.
how do you feel?
@silverpuppi1827 unfortunately ive been there, people who dont want to change or accept what they do is wrong gives you two options.
1 put up with it for the rest of your life and it will progressively get worse and worse and have catasrophic results on your education, career and relationships.
Or option 2, cut them off when you get yourself into a situation where you no loger have to rely on them anymore.
I had option 2 forced onto me, homelessness from age 16 which lasted 8 years, its been nearly 5 years since i was homeless and they destroyed my education and career prospects and i still have no contact with them. Ive managed to rebuild my entire life and get legitimate treatment for the CPTSD they forced onto me as they tried to pass down their generational cycle of abuse.
It gets better but only when you want things to get better.
From one stranger to another i wish you all the best and dont be afraid to reach out for help from qualified individuals/specialists.
i can feel ya dude
My friend does too lol
doesn’t sound like a friend
What a horrible personality i have... even before reading anything about manipulating, i kept doing all of them in day to day life, now i understand how insufferable i am
@@windrunner2210 that actually means you are insightful and you care about being a good person and you're willing to admit when you're wrong, and all of that is pretty great, and if you have all those good traits already then you know you're not a horrible person who can never be good ever, so you know you have the capability to learn to interact with people in better ways! You might need to talk to people you trust about how you want to change your behavior or, I don't know, do research on how to stop manipulting peole or interpersonal effectiveness or something?
@NiennaFan1 thank you so much, someone finally noticed that im changing without sarcasm, it means a lot to me, and im working on it, changed so much in past few month❤
Reading comments like this makes me feel a little better because I often overthink that I’m not a nice person like I’m supposed to be. Like everybody else. It’s like, everybody is a good person but me. But on videos like these, I realize that there are people who are indeed like me. Maybe people just aren’t being honest in daily life.
I don’t mean to be cringy but hey at least we’re not the only ones ^^ I hope you can better yourself no matter how many decades it might take.
@BabyFacedDolly don't push yourself too much, no one is perfect, even the best of people have their own flaws, you are what you meant to be, Changing yourself too much will be just pretending to be liked by others which can make you anxious or insecure... i wish you success❤️
Gaslighting example:
Watching a group of people try to overthrow the United States government and then being told it was a day of love and not a big deal🤦🏾♂️
i just realized i have been manipulated in almost every shape and form by a guy who i thought was my twinflame so that's great
benefit of the doubt. Just have a chat with them. it’s just a youtube video.
@@patrickjameskellyof9e415 oh no. He/we ended things months ago. And he blamed everything on me when our common friend asked. And I was gaslit into thinking it's my fault. So yeah no
@@patrickjameskellyof9e415 So all the people here blaming mum’s and ex girlfriends are fine but when a man is the perpetrator he’s just misunderstood?
@@lololnope34567 i was wrong here and in most cases but thats not what i meant
@@lololnope34567that’s the sad state of RUclips commenters that we’re dealing with
The silent treatment hit hard... A friend started ignoring me for seemingly no reason and now I know why
My ex gf gave me the silent treatment for two month before we got together because we apparently got close too fast.. Red flags? Never heard of them
I get that, my ex best friend did that to me. It absolutely broke me and now she’s trying to use triangulation on me but also dropped all her other friends, so instead she just says I’m racist to the 3 people who still tolerate her and anyone else she meets :)
It’s the worst when they do this in a situation where you are trapped in the same place with them. You start going crazy inside your head, people who are experts at silent treatment are so stubborn, they can sit next to you for hours without speaking a word and not give up to their commitment to be silent.
As a society that is much too interconnected at any given time i think we have to carefully differentiate silent treatment and avoiding electronics..
"Political party I don't like:"
3 likes no comments? let me fix that.
oh hi danymok
Bot
@@RainbowProCat no im not lol
@@getnoobed6203 I'm not talking abt you
Gotta love watching this and realizing my very recent ex whom I was with for 3 years used pretty much all of these in a destructive manner. Gonna take a fair bit to heal, cheers for the info 👍
i thought you were the evaluator and i got so confused LMAO 😭😭
LOL SAME I WAS LIKE “WTH HAPPENED TO THEIR VOICE!?”😭
They're run by the same channel though
@@Deleted-User12535 huh.
@@chimaunao I mean same person
@@Deleted-User12535 how do you know??
11:27 Or you could say “womp womp”
I think the worst part is the more aware and resistant you becone to manipulation, you realize how common it is. Then the real irony kicks in and you start to notice yourself subconsciously doing it to others, the struggle of being a human.
I love gasoline
.
Same. I drink some every day.
No you don’t
Me too
You mean Gasoline by The Interrupters?
2:04 LMAO my mom XD
Mine is exactly the same 😒
Same😤
For me Guilt tripping = Projection = Blame shifting. It's different perspectives of the same thing. Silent treatment = Stonewalling, too. But I would say the others are acceptable as different manipulation tactics.
remember that things like lovebombing and mirroring are red flags, not red lights! some of these are manipulative no matter what but others can have valid reasons, so remember that you can have things that set off alarms without being a deal breaker on their own (red flags), things that set off alarms AND are deal breakers whether or not there are other issues (red lights), and things that dont set off alarms at all (green/beige flags)
little1133 mirroring isnt a red flag lol a lot of neurodivergent people do it to not make neurotypicals uncomfortable..
@@VivienVarga-ki3sd A red flag is just a sign that the individual needs to be investigated if it is done maliciously or not. Its not an instant deal breaker. So calling mirroring a red flag is perfectly reasonable. There is a video called "that's a red flag? but I do that" that talks about this in more depth if you want more info.
@@VivienVarga-ki3sd exactly which is why it's not a red light. there are a lot of very valid reasons to do a lot of things that are often considered red flags and people consider different things red and green flags
Its good to know! Now I can recognize the manipulation taktiks and defend myself. I think everybody manipulated somebody in his life, without knowing. It is importent to recognize them and evoiding them to use.
Manipulation is not inherently bad. It's all about your intention behind it. Using it to set boundaries is ok. However, only using someone for your benefit will lead to trouble.
stonewalling works great on narcissists
Mirroring is something those with Autism do in order to feel they fit in. Not a manipulative tactic in that situation
In that context, it's known as masking.
@@StorySeeker888It’s a part of masking.
Still a very unhealthy thing to be doing though.
If you do bad things out of fear, you are still doing bad things. Don’t do it. It’s a manipulative lie to “mask” or whatever newspeak nonsense you’re calling it.
I study psychology about manipulation on my free time. Now, I am using that knowledge that serves both sword and shield
Everyone do it, the difference is the intensity and how far… how conscious or not
couldn't of put it better myself
This is a mediocore story , about my childhood , but i Guarantee you that you will gain new insigts from my experiences
Bro summarized my most of the childhood , But i think if you know behind the scenes whats causing them to act like that , and what is your aim ,then you just dont care much about these tactics and just directly ask them in a logical sentence
Thats why i like science and Maths ,they exactly tell you what ,why & how without any B.S. tacts , But yeah it was true i was acconted for something very horrible which i didnt do in 5th grade ,and i cried for like 2 days straight ,the amount of stress it created when i went to home given i was the topper of my class ,but still those kids blamed me ,anyway i realized my mistakes ,crying or sobing wont do you any good ,the only thing which will remain always true is Logic and maths ,no one can emotionally attack it and if you can prove something with math then its done ,its like embedded on a stone ,nobody cant deny it, But judging on the base that everyone pointing finger at me that i have done it ,without considering the possiblity of me getting framed is just injustice ,well helpless me ,but i think that incedent indeed made me think and approach anything very cautiosly and differently and finally now i know all the reasons and logic behind all tactics and all upcoming future tacts , And i think it really pushed my thinking abilities ,as i speak with so much certainity now ,I also liked the buddist practice like how they have a another subject to takle all those thought and that too with maximum efficiecy ,But still i am not able to find a pure innocent hardworking soul ,and from that day in 5th grade i decided to do whatever it takes to become so powerful in all physical ,mental , financial and the only dream i have is to be able to solve and help any innocent hardworking person suffering coz of those MFs ,
I hope if anyone reads it then please atleast dont belame someone for things that hadnt even done, Atleast not a child please!
🙏
And this was just one of my event from childhood ,so yes other things also happened ,and i dont wanna recall them now,bye.
Came here to find out if I am getting manipulated, ended up realizing I was a manipulator 😔
Well at least it shows that you're honest about yourself which is a good step, the next step is to try to stop manipulating other people.
gossssh my hs ex was so good at manipulation in general and gaslighting specifically that TO THIS DAY i doubt whether or not i was actually gaslit. insane.
sometimes i decide to joke around with my friends and do "guilt tripping" and they just say stfu lmao
Good, they are denying you that gratification of actually manipulating them and stopping you dead in your tracks. If you want to stay friends with them I would advise you go to a therapist with this because it's neither funny nor normal.
@@shroomer3867 nigga it's called a joke
I had so many of these behaviors danm. I got some personal work to do.💀💀
@@Xoxo_Catborah you can do it i believe in you! And you can always ask people you are close to to let you know how you are doing!
Thank you for this tutorial. It's really helpful for any office job.
Video idea: The electromagnetic spectrum explained.
Like so the analyst can see this!
The electromagnetic spectrum doesn’t exist
How to handle guilt tripping:
If someone is talking about sad stuff, and is talking to you about it, then there’s a chance they actually are genuinely in need of help! So don’t assume they’re trying to manipulate you just yet.
However, that's not saying how to handle guilt tripping. That's saying to give them a chance, but not actually the way to handle guilt tripping. Maybe I'm misunderstanding the point of your comment, though.
i know silent treatment is another way to manipulate people but in my case, i would use silent treatment to people i no longer want to communicate with, especially when I'm mad, upset or sad, because I don't want to hurt them with the words i wanted to say, cause once i snap i wouldn't be able to hold back my mouth from running. and i would need some time to cool down before talking to them again. i guess it's just my defense mechanism to protect myself and people around me to prevent more conflicts. but i know that i should communicate better and I'm currently working on that.
13:22 why would you talk to Iraq😂
Right? I see Iraq and Iran. Gnome saiyan?
We can all thank our narcissistic parents for this video!
It's not "playing the victim", it's acknowledging that we were raised by dysfunctional people and doing something to change our own behavior in response to their effect on our psyche
Very very cool video! That would be cool to have a second one telling of how to ecologically react on each type of manipulation.
My dad pulls the guilt tripping thing with me a lot, ever since I was five. Over time I learned that not caring or making it seem like I don’t care about how he felt was the way to go.
So, if I decide to get up and leave the room for example, and he says, “Well, I guess you don’t appreciate my company.” I’ll say something along the lines of, “What took you so long to figure *that* out?” then remind him of all the times he’s made me feel worthless all because he was just cranky.
1:06 her face isn't exactly realistic. my mother and people around me constantly gaslight me. lots of people in society do so, sadly. but it's not some evil grin thing. they may not even realize they're doing it. that's actually probably the case most times.
Damn this hurt to hear ngl I got a big ass heart and always give ppl chances and got pure intentions but realizing now I've been treated alot of these ways my entire life... cold world man fr
The more I watch the video, the more I know why people call me manipulator
@Kyryyn_Lyyh feedback noted! Thanks.
Great video amigo!🫶🏽
With silent treatment I'm glad that extreme example at end was there because I feel it can be easy to misconstrue someone dealing with things with being toxic.
USA and I*real great tactics in one video
Sometimes it's manipulation. Sometimes it's miscommunication. The difference is intent. Please keep this in mind.
Well this is good and I've felt bad for doing some of these
I couldn’t have seen this at a better time. Currently going through a few of these
hmmm...This could be useful...
🤫
💀
Me suddenly out of nowhere at 7 years old
tHIs coULd bE uSeFul
sigma sigma on the wall, who's the skibbidiest of them all? It's you, yes it's you
I’m one of the many people who loves to play the victim, I gotta do better
Lmaoo noooo don’t do it bruh
Go for it, dude! Its going to feel much better, trust me.