When I was younger, my mother told me I could bring my boyfriend home. She said she preferred for us to be in a safe space rather than putting ourselves in danger. She was traumatized by a friend who died when they were teens after running out of the house at night to meet her boyfriend.
Honestly , even indian parents' are like that . They don't want their kid to do 'that' thing before marriage. And also indian who are in living relationship will never get the permission to live with out getting married. Indian parents are like do everything after getting married not before that ...!
Asian parents be like: your already big but you still don't know how to clean the house But when you have boyfriend: your still a kid how dare you get a boyfriend Edit:ok and other mother's not only asians lol
Greetings from Finland where most of the people move away from home around our 20's and families usually do not care or get involved in our relationships. This does not mean that we "sleep around" or are sexually more active than elsewhere, but it is nice to be able to decide about these things - dating, relationships and life in general - on your own. Like when you are getting to know a new person, how wonderfull it is to stay up all night together at home, just talking - no sex - and getting to know eachother better. And no-one cares what your relationship status is (dating, marriage, what-ever), not your parents nor your neighbours. Must say this is one of the best things about living in here! :)
I think because of that (freedom to do what we please) there is no huge pressure about having sex. We can do it if we want to, but there is no "stress" like seems to be in Korea. Building a serious relationship is difficult as it is and even more so if there is no proper place for real intimacy. Glad to hear that times are changing though!
It’s similar in Germany. Considering how old you are, it’s not even a problem to bring your boy-/girlfriend home or for a sleep over. In general the parents from girls are a little bit more protective, but still moderate.
I'm 25 and from Argentina. I think nowadays living with our parents is getting more common again but because rent is super expensive and unemployment is getting worse, so you have a lot of people in their 30's and more going back to live with their family because we can't afford to live alone. BTW I just found your channel and I love seeing someone talking so openly and honest about Korea!
30s? I'm from Argentina and most my friends and I are in our 30s and we live alone. 20s is okay still. But 30s feels very weird unless some exceptional situation.
@@camdelg1 Many people I have met at University had to go back to live with their parents either because they broke up with their partner and no longer could afford living alone or because they lost their job and so could no longer pay rent and all the services. (Me encanta que somos de Argentina pero hablamos en Ingles jajaja)
Yap but that is because the economy, most of people here prefer living alone after 20' and most of the families are ok with that. Culturally is nothing wrong with living alone or live with your boyfriend/girlfriend. Como sea, esperemos que todo mejore, la veo difícil... Pero esperemos.
That means dating in Korean culture not that much different from India. Forget parents we even live with our father and mother in law after marriage. Bringing boys to home is like a big decision for us and get ready to answer your parents QS's. It's an Asian thing but time is changing and so does the mentality of the parents also.
Haaaahaaa LoL 😂😂😂😂 you are right even whenever I talked or hangout with my guy friends my dad always asked me who's that guy, what's his name etc,😂😂 like chill dad I am not dating him
@@samsonmasih3380 LoL 😂😂😂 you are right everytime my mom and dad sees the name in the phone of my guy friends, they started to ask me million questions 😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅( like chill your daughter ain't gonna runaway with a guy )
So does this confirm some scenes we see in kdramas are true about Korean culture.l am talking about couples going to cafes,kiss ,walk and get back to their homes ?
I'm not korean but most Asian think of such scene is a normal scene to see. We just gotta back home at night, some parents even being strict about the maximum time
Do women not move into places with other female roommates until they are married? In my experience, it was a good way to gain independence from parents while having roomies who looked after one another. It felt safer, too... plus, the added benefit of splitting living expenses.
Well for me I'd rather move into places alone. Bec I'm not comfortable living with other people and always had a hard time dealing with them. Maybe bec I'm introverted. Lol!
@Shivangi I'm not showing the bad side I'm just telling the truth. N yaa our country has too many rape cases so our parents don't allow us to date . But it's like don't u think they r too protective 😅
Its weird how different it is... Im from Germany, and my family is polish. its normal to get your own apartment (or with your partner) in your 20s. Also my mother says to me "Better dont marry anyone, you will just regret it in 20years" haha
I am also from Germany and half of my friends are my age around 19-23 and already have kids but aren't married I haven't even had a boyfriend yet and I am 22 years old but now my parents want me to find someone and get married I am from a Christian family my parents are Nigerians and I was born and raised in Germany sooo yeah I need to get married fast so that I can 😏🤭
I mean, I personally choose to wait for things until marriage, but that’s just it. It’s my own personal choice. I feel like couples should have the freedom to choose what works best for them. That said, thanks for this video, it’s interesting to see glimpses into what it’s like to live in Korea.
Korean and indians have so much in common like both of our cultures are conservative... They have similar languages (like many similar words)...similar food tastes both like spicy foods n now dating norms too....anyways i really love ur channel.... Love from INDIA.... 언니를 사랑해💜💜
Which is such a contradiction considering the media shows how so many Americans can't afford to pay rent, or bills while their income remains flat. Freedom from parents is cool, but financial freedom is cooler.
Glad to see, that you are gaining a lot of traction nowadays. You knew how to adjust to the current circumstances. You have the intelligence and the determination. If you weren't that lazy, you could be conquering space. Watch out! Don't heart this by mistake and then unheart it like the last time. I could misinterpret it. Talking about determination, I am determined aswell. I just want that one cheesecake. And I know I will get it.
Jina is so funny while being honest. The korean culture is kind of similar to our indian culture. Suprising. Make more videos like this please, and some with your puppy.
How are you Jina? I'm so happy cause this is the first time I'm so early! Hope you, your family, and your friends are doing well! Thanks for uploading!
Of course, i mean read Bukhari on marriage, which basically says the virgin is preferable to the matron (which translates to 2x more dowry). Of course, in such cultures, the non-virgin = matron XD
Wait. There is a difference between arab culture and practicing Islamic religion. When you mentioned bukhari, you refer to the Islamic religion, not the arabic culture. Also, the vergin thing is not very relevant, and is not linked to the dowry. The point is, its safer for the new family to be stabilised in marriage to be intimate and secure in each other's presence... Also, that's why it is relatively easy to get married and get divorced through the islamic way in order to discourage intimacy out of wedlock. .. Just wanted to clarify 💜
@@zahraboudidah9334 I kno. But i feel as if religion affects culture, in a way, especially when its been practised across generations. For example, nowhere in the quran or hadith does it say that the bride price for a vergin is 2x more than a matron, but it is what it is today. Perhaps the religious significance of purity plays a role in the said calculation for the bride price, in cultures where it is practised.
@@MoonCherryLove I think the place depends too. I have no idea were the idea of verginity paying double came from and in which country this is being practiced. But in the middle east, a woman's dowry is expensive. Period. That's not right by any means, but virginity really doesn't really play a role. Also, how can you enforce that a woman is in fact a virgin? These things should be between the couple only. It's true that today a lot of culture and religion is mixed. However, the lines are clear between religion and culture for any that care to look. All I am saying is that it's not always right to mix everything under one category and give it an unflattering label just because some people are too lazy to understand the intricacies of the subject..
I traveled abroad , and lived with my korean ex girlfriend and I’m shocked it’s a taboo. Our entire relationship was a taboo it seems by korean standards and it was a disaster.
There was a Korean advertisement that dealt with Korean dates and it said date course is one of the three: 1. Restaurant- cafe -movie 2. movie -restaurant- cafe 3. Restaurant -movie -cafe (Just joking though. It is so much fun to live in Korea as there are so many inside entertainment places as well :))
Three hours are enough for a lot of couples to do the deed! Definitely interesting and entertaining to hear you speak about some unique things about Korean dating culture. Keep up the great content 🙌💯💃🕺
It may be enough to do the deed, but it is not enough to take your make-up off apparently, or to see if your partner is a tidy person or leaves his or her dirty socks and underwear lying around...
You actually have a loooot of places for dates!! A lot of different cute places with a bench and a wonderful view on the sunset over the city, without anyone! I am always chocked about the fact that no korean go there for dates
I'm from Argentina, and here no one really cares about the status of your relationship i mean they do but is just a gossip thing and in the end it doesn't really matter ... Most of parents are aware that their children are sexually active when they get into their 20s. It's pretty common in people around 30s that they live with their significant others, even getting married is actually weird lol and the people who are, usually do it bc of paperwork or for having a party lol (or very religious people) but they do it after a long long time of living together... NO ONE (very religious people are the exception) here thinks about marrying someone that you have never live with. My grandma said to me once "don't do serious relationships until you finish studying, just do your thing with men and let them go quickly" LMAO
And just for the record is not like no one here gets married, there are a lot of people that choose to do it for love or any reason ... what i meant is that in here there is not much pressure about getting married or about not having sex outside marriage, i feel like you got more room to hve a CHOICE if u want to or not ... and i'm sure (like all places around the globe) that there are still some people in here that don't think that way,... I just wanted to describe what is the thinking on these issues in general
In Brazil we have love motels too and some of us still live with our parents even though we're in our 30's, it's pretty common to live with our parents until we get married but most of the parents are open to their kids relationships, unfortunately I wasn't born in that kind of a family, my family is pretty conservative.
@@vivianla9085 the conservative families yes, especially if they are from church(idk if this make sense in english, i hope so lol) and if its a girl but is kinda normal do before the marriage The average age to lose the virginity is 17 yrs old
In my country courtship is the first stage( to show how serious you are and it can be considered as dating). you have to court a girl to get her sweet "yes" and if she says yes to you then it is the only time where you became a official bf/gf. During courtship, it is the time of getting to know each other and having a deep feelings with each other. In that stage kissing and touching each other is not allowed( to show respect to the girl) . Once the girl allow you to hold her hands it is a sign where the girl is almost saying yes or almost accepting a guy as her bf. Courtship almost last for 2 months or a year depends to a girl. Before you start to court a girl, the guy should ask permission to the parents of a girl and that is the first meeting of a guy and the parents of a girl, and after that, the boy should presents the girl to his parents and family as well. it is formality to show respect to their parents (By the way i experienced to court a girl for almost 1 yr. Bef. We became official as a couple). The bf/gf stage is a second then it will level up to proposal where a guy asking a girl to be his wife it usually last for a months or a year ( it depends to a couple when will be they getting married).
My parent warning us, sibling, not to dating anyone during my school day. Then, my brother got a girlfriend and since that day, they keep warning us not to dating anyone until I got into college, they said "when you at college, don't ever find a boyfriend/girlfriend because you still young(18 at that time and now I'm 20)". So, I said "Don't worryyy. I won't marry to anyone till I die. I'll be single forever". My parent: *silent Me: *smiling Also which is why I never attracted to anyone and game addict(They mad at us for playing game everyday. I guess they forgot that they the one who 'inspired' us to play game cuz it too troublesome to take care of an eldest son, a twin and a lil son cuz our gap aren't that big.) There's one time they ask me what type of man I like, I said no one. Silent back again~
Exactly! I was discussing a personal matter with my bf which I had to keep secret since we live far apart and we both gotta finish school and all, my grades are probably the best out of my siblings, I listened the most and never disrespected my parents, so I don't understand why there's so overprotective. They saw our texts while I was using the bathroom, maybe if I closed my door nothing would've happened. But they have the audacity to tell me he's a distraction, I literally text everyone when I'm done with homework, I feel more focused with online school then I did before that! He even helped me with summer school so? They want me to not sleep with ANYONE before marriage, but I have 2 older sisters who did that with more than 1 person, tbh I'm kinda shocked they're able to keep up with jobs, my mom always makes sour comments referencing to teen pregnancy. My sisters had their first kids at my age, I haven't even introduced any guy friends lmao, I don't even hang out with girl friends outside of school hours. I'd love to shock them like that but I'm bisexual so idk what to do lmao
I love talking about Korean culture with my non-Korean friends and I also bring up these topics in my English discussion classes with my Korean students. It's really a good conversation starter. Love this topic! Thanks for sharing! I can look up more of the issues you brought up and start up some good conversation :)
When we travelled in Korea it was great there were so many cheap hotels, we didn't know it was a love motel or not so we stayed in some for sure, sometimes asked to see the room first so we knew what we were paying for. Some funny surprises, heart shaped bed, blacklight erotic pictures on the wall, the clear bathroom wall so you always see the person in the bathroom. A red light we could not figure our how to turn it off that made it hard to sleep. The cheaper room was more normal lol Most of them were normal just with lots of floral patterns on the wall and curtains. But I am very glad we could afford to travel because we did not have much money, and we were there to explore all the tourist attractions and mountains and have fun.
Everyone’s talking about her avoiding the ”sex” word and every Asian parents relate to what she’s saying about them but I’m sitting here confused on how she’s 31 and looks like a goddess
I was always quite interested in how real life really looks in Korea as opposed to the K-Dramas I watch. From a perspective of a westerner I’m sometimes a bit shocked how unnatural dating really feels in Korea but in a way I can understand the more conservative approach as well. We westerners unfortunately pushed sexual freedom to the extreme and I guess adopting certain Korean standards would do our society good. The key is to find that balance when we have freedom to explore our sexuality before we get married but in the same time we know there are lines we shouldn’t cross.
Jina, I love your earrings and outfit! My parents think like that too. I agree with you that a couple should live together first before marrying to see if it works out.
FINALLY a frank discussion about sexuality in Korea! Thanks 😊 The k-dramas drive me crazy waiting for 20 episodes for them to have one innocent looking kiss!
I've been with my boyfriend (Korean) for almost a year now, and hoo boi, the "no privacy no intimacy unless you go to a motel" is soooo rough... like you said in the video, it's not just about sexual stuff, but we can't just hang out and watch a movie in bed or peacefully spend the night together unless we're ready to make the trip to a motel and pay for it... we're both university students and live in the dormitories, so there's never a chance for privacy anywhere unless we go to a motel :(
While she was talking all i could see were the earrings, like, they are so cool 😍 Also, in Latin America is the complete opposite to everything you just said, i guess parents are more open to those stuffs 🤷🏼♀️
I’m a Mexican and I can relate all that too 😭 One question: Is that the same with males in Korea? I mean, Do Korean parents see it right or normal when is about males?
I'm Russian and thanks for USSR influence,our parents(I'd say more like grand-parents) are conservative too. I'm lucky because my parents don't think like "oh my god she has a boyfriend,why they can't get married?",but they still are a bit conservative,homophobic and etc. I hope in future generations thing would be better. :)
Hi Jina.. i love how the way you think.. I am Indonesian. Actually, Korean parents same to Indonesian parents mostly. But I personally have mindset like yours. Open minded. Nice to know u Jina
I'm from a small European country and we have cafes everywhere hahaha. I've been to Seoul and there is not as many cafes like there are in my city hahaha. And the reason is not like - we have to have a place to date. It's just that we like to sit there and drink coffee with friends/parents/partners... but mostly friends... In my country kids move out when they go to university. It depends if you go to another city or not... But I'd say at least 50% of the young people go to universities in another cities. Then they live in dorms or apartments with roomates - so they kinda have a place to go to with their boyfriends/girlfriends. But even though a lot of people move out we have cafes EVERYWHERE. Literally one next to another lmao.
This is making me realize how open my parents are. As a korean who grew up abroad, I always saw my parents as strict compared to my “western” friends’ parents but they’ve always been open to me having a boyfriend since high school. They even let me go on vacation with him although my dad is always a little wary. In fact, my mother always said it’s dumb to wait until marriage because how can you know you’re suitable. Of course that being said, she would never approve me going around different men 🤣 Now I’m so thankful for my parents, I can’t imagine dating and having to do things behind my parents’ backs or trying to go to love motels
Really different dating culture! I'm from Sweden and I had my first boyfriend when I was 15 and he visited me and my family and we were spending nights ourselves together in my room. So I started my dating life at that time. My parents didn't care what I was doing, unless I knew what I was doing. It was all my choices and I knew I had their support if anything happens. I moved out from my parents when I was 19, to my own apartment and even that was my choice. I met my husband when I was 20, we dated a few months before I told my parents about him. After 5 months of dating I moved to him. We were living together for many years and got two kids before we decided to getting married. So 13 years after we first met, we got married. To swedes, it's common for couples being unmarried and just living together when they got kids. Even my parents were not married when I was born in the 80's. So when I saw this video about korean dating culture, I thought it was an interesting topic.
@@campkira What do you mean? The sexual education here in Sweden is good, so the youth people know about safe sex, condoms and birth control pills and things like that. I knew that already before middle school. Youth people can get those without the parents knowledge. So it's good. We all know that youth people does have sex, so knowledge about safe sex is important!!
As a Filipino, one of our core values in gratitude and familial piety. Which is why we stay with our parents until we get married. Its a way of "giving back" to our parents for all those years of their hardwork and sacrifice to take care of us and send us to school. Its not like the family is oblidging us to give back, but it feels like an innate duty.
Hi Jina. I'm from Brazil, I'm 30 and I still live with my parents. Here there are some things that are similar to Korea. For example: the guys like when the girl lives alone because this way it's easier to have sex with her. But at the same time when you still live with your parents after being 25 people think you are a baby girl and spoilled.... So, it's difficult. When you live with your parents you have to inform when you go out and the time you're going to come back home. In my case, I can't sleep with my boyfriend (in his house or in a motel). I can go there but I have to come back home after sometime. About having sex before getting married it's not a problem for them (my parents). I can talk openly with my mother. They are a little conservative in some aspects but in this specific aspect they are cool. They are like: please girl, have sex before getting married... You have to know good things in life without being in a marriage 😂😂😂😂 I agree with you about the fact that the girl can pay the motel. Afterall they both are using the space and they both are in love (or not). And since nowadays women can work, can pay for their own bills and can spend their money with whatever they want, they can also pay the motel. Btw, I love your videos very much!!!! 😘😘
I'm brazilian aswel and its the same for me. Except for the parents being ok with sex before marriage, I've never talked about it with them. Since they don't even let me spend the night at my boyfriend's house, I can assume that they don't approve it. (I'm 27, by the way, of course I already had sex. I think they live in denial Hahahahaha)
@@btsforever5791 Why not? I'm 23 and I can do what I want. My parents are happy if I ask their opinion but I don't have to. A lot of people live in happy relationships together in their early 20's, completely free from their parents. This is how it works most of the countries in Europe.
@@Anna-gv2lb You westerners are SOOO lucky. You have so much freedom, it surprises us Asians. Our parents, relatives who we don't even know, and the whole society controls our lives. We can't even step out of the house without someone blowing up, we can't choose our careers, we can't even marry anyone with our choice. Our families and the people around us make our life decisions, we have no choice but to obey them💔
I stopped asking my parents permission for anything when I was 14. I moved out to live with my friend and lived exactly how I wanted. As an adult I have a good friendship with my parents, I’m more mature than they ever were. I am always surprised by the restriction of other cultures.
Greetings from Czech republic. I have to say that in my country it's a total opossite. We are moving away from our parent's house usually after finishing high school, so about 18/19 years and we get jobs, go to universities and so on. And it's actually considered very weird if a couple decide to get married without living together. It's really rare. People should first get to know each other, then get to know each other on a intimate level because without that, you don't know if you are compatible. Then living together and after some time get married. I can't talk for all parents, but usually parents don't really interfere with there kids lives and it's not weird to share our personal life with our parents. In my opinion it's better, because we learn to be responsible and independent.
I think that's one of the biggest things western culture is different in dating. We would just be friends at first meet each other going somewhere to eat some icecream etc. Where I live (near the blackforest in germany) you could say lets take a walk in the forest and enjoy the beautiful scenery. Maybe If you are more introverted you meet in your room earlier. I mean we would just ask hey wanna come over we could watch some movies. Of course there are parents beeing protective, but I think my parents and even the person I'm only Dating would feel better if I just say lets go to my house instead of hey lets go to a love motel. I think I would Sound like I really have a big need for sexual interactions. But it's really funny and interesting to see the smallest differences in cultures. :D
It's the same with indian culture! Indian and Korean culture is very similar! Still up to date indians women also face this issue! It's a very judgmental society that we live in! And harsh reality how women still face discrimination, inequality and inequity till now
@@ayonticabanerjee8326 it's your choice and your decision! Wherever u go there are going to be issues everywhere! Wishing you good luck and all the best in ur path of journey wherever ur destiny and ur choices takes u too!
Thanks for sharing this! I'm Canadian, and I know each country is a bit different, but my parents are very conservative, and they have most of these same expectations. When I was in university, they didn't even want me visiting my male friends' apartments on my own, or talking to random people in the mall, for fear that I'd get a "bad reputation". Personally, I'm waiting 'til marriage, but these expectations are difficult!
As an Asian-American guy who's 34, single, and living at "home" right now, I don't know if I'll ever "do the deed" with any girl before marriage... I just haven't met a girl where I WANT to "do" her, yet... Haha. (I have high standards BTW.)
Wow, my boyfriends parents must be pretty cool! I lived with him before I left Korea, and every time I visit his mother is happy for me to go see him, we also went on a vacation together and they didn't mind, maybe they're cooler about it since he's a guy, but I always had the idea that they were very conservative haha
This moving out of the family home thing is a modern phenomena. Anyone in the US studying their family history can easily see this. Even though I did it (leave the home), I've since become critical of the practice. There is politics behind it.
I think she needs to research something about her parents generation. Love motels existed back then as well, and people had a lot of sex also. It just was something that wasn't talked about in society or people would lie about it.
German parents usually don't care except if they are very religious, which isn't the norm where I live. My mom taught me important things about the topic of sex and intimacy when I was a teenager so I knew about all those things even before I got into my first relationship at 18. She never cared if I have sex as long as I feel comfortable and not pressured and as long as I am in a happy and healthy relationship. She checks in from time to time to ask if everything is ok between me and my boyfriend to make sure I'm still happy. She just wanted me to wait with sleeping over at his place for 3 months, because I wasn't on birth control yet back then, and she also said I should make sure that he is the one I want to have my first time with. She also thinks it's important to have sex before marriage because only then you can know if you're sexually compatible. If it turns out you aren't sexually compatible after you've married it can lead to many relationship problems. All my friends including me regularly sleep over at their boyfriends/girlfriends place or the other way around. That's totally normal. I also went on two vacations with my boyfriend and I'm only 20 😂 my friends also do that.
Jina, I do not watch your videos in almost a year, and I come back, and, it’s the same Jina Kim, funny, honest, confident, brave, kind, attractive, appealing, and many other attributes, just a good person. It would be fun to date you, outside of Korea of course. Your parents would not approve of my culture, or, maybe they would, hard to say. Anyway, I wish you the best Jina Kim, hope this crisis doesn’t stop you from looking for the one, I hope you find him soon.
I agree, people need to live together before marriage, is the only way to know the good and bad habits of the significant other and just to make sure that you both are committed and compatible. No surprises.
I think its just Asian culture lolol bc my parents reacted the same way too and I had to explain to them that its new generation and its not like I'm out and about with a stranger. I've been with the same person for 6yrs now so it should be fine to travel with him.
This is really strange and rediculous too. No one has to spend nights together to know eachother perfectly. If someone really cares about his/her partner then some meetings with each other again and again in a peaceful environment is enough. They can get enough time to share eachother's thoughts And it's only possible if both of them are truly interested in each other and serious for their relationship. It's my opinion. i really don't want to hurt or judge anyone. I love you Jina❤️and love your videos too❤️
I read that single korean ladies in their 30s-40s are happy staying single. Edit: I think its the fact they like to live alone and then dating comes last.
@Mitch 1066 Can't understand how some women can accept to have spent about the half of their lives studying in order to have a decent job and then they drop everything when they just start working for the family and the husband
Hey jina kim, it’s the same here too . Girls and boys live with their parents before marriage .. and in our case it’s the parents who bring the marriage proposals through mariage institutions, relatives , friends and then u meet the person first in cafe a few times and then both the families meet . It’s pretty much the same here . It’s just that we don’t have love motels here ..
With my partners, I really like to share almost everything about me LOL I do this because I really want someone to love me for who I am. I can’t imagine marrying someone if I didn’t feel emotionally close with them.
Turkish people think EXACTLY like that! It‘s just soo unfair because when it comes to men the parents don’t say anything at all but when it comes to girls NOTHING is allowed! Not sleeping together before marriage, living together, traveling together etc. it‘s sooo bad! I really hate it! But I think korean people are not as strict as Turkish people but still I never understood this culture...
A very well made video Jina. Really interesting to watch even for an "outsider". I am going to Seoul next year for 6 month for language study primly. Dating the local girls there is not on my priority list. But if I am still single then in 2021 and if I get the chance to date I would not say no but is not a topic I think much about. Your video was still very enjoyable to. It was well presented with many interesting info. Keep up your great work.
The reality is that issues like living together before getting married or having relationships in addition to honorifices is something that is the same throughout the world, the same in Asia as in the West. The difference is that Asia continues to apply it and sometimes exaggerated it in certain countries. However in the West many places no longer apply (use) it and only use it when they are in the work area or special occasions.
Concerning datin and marriage, Americans used to have the same ideas, perceptions, and opinions as today's traditional/older Korans about dating, pre-marital sex, and unmarried couples living together. Those attitudes were reflected in American TV shows and movies which further maintained and reinforced that conservative viewpoint. I have been watching a lot of Kdramas and K-movies. These Korean media portrayals of how couples meet, interact, and spend private time together are very similar to what dating and marriage was like in America in the 1950s - 1960s. Another aspect of examining this topic is the difference between Korea's family-oriented cultural norms versus Western-European-American family relationships. For example, many Korean dramas and movies portray arranged marriages. That very rarely, if at all, happens in America. My understanding is that Koreans are raised in a culture based on Confucian concepts of community and family duty-loyalties and cooperation with societal norms. In contrast, Americans adhere to the concept of individualism and personal freedom. This individualism is reflected in how a person meets, chooses to date and marry another. Of course, Americans hope that their families, relatives and friends will support them and give their approval of the chosen person, but that is not a factor that will solidify or break the couple's choice to be with each other. Interestingly, the American divorce rate is still rather high....about 43% (per the 43 states that reported this statistic in 2023). Whatever and whichever way you "make your bed and sleep in it", it is an individual's sole responsibility to either stay in a relationship/marriage or terminate the relationship. You choose; not your prospective partner, not your parents, not your grandparents, not your employer, not your friends. It is all up to you.
I’m English live in America and am 73 so I think I have quite a wide knowledge. Brave you for saying the things you have said. At 15 English girls are a lot of time sexually active even in my time. Less then than now. I feel like it’s important not to get a social disease or get pregnant but other than that sex is a normal part of life. Love you you brave girl but 31 is a time for reproducing IF you want a family. 💜🧡❤️
actually on certain aspects it's not that different here in italy, i think it's because the age where young people are actually able to buy their house or live alone got delayed by job issues and low salaries...so private time with your partener are not that usual or easy to have (especially if your parents don't work anymore so they are always at home).
When I was younger, my mother told me I could bring my boyfriend home. She said she preferred for us to be in a safe space rather than putting ourselves in danger.
She was traumatized by a friend who died when they were teens after running out of the house at night to meet her boyfriend.
That's sad, I understand your mom
Awww, that's sad hopes she gets better.
Your mom is great.
Jina avoiding the word “sex” is a mood😂
Put some (*) in the middle please
@@diana021_2 whyyy??
FR 🤣
Tee K it’s so adorable lol
@BTS BLACKPINK FOREVER there are. Eg: myself
Honestly , even indian parents' are like that . They don't want their kid to do 'that' thing before marriage. And also indian who are in living relationship will never get the permission to live with out getting married. Indian parents are like do everything after getting married not before that ...!
So true :P
Not only Indian, i think it must be a asian thing, sex before marriage is a taboo.
Yep
Yeah so true and also no dating until you reach the age of 20 😅😅😅 IDK about other indian parents but my parents are like that
Until the age of 20 I think dating is just forbidden 🤣 until marriage
Asian parents be like:
your already big but you still don't know how to clean the house
But when you have boyfriend:
your still a kid how dare you get a boyfriend
Edit:ok and other mother's not only asians lol
Lmao. Can confirm.
yalah lmao, confirm chop guarantee
PERIODTTTT
so true
sounds like my mom lol
Greetings from Finland where most of the people move away from home around our 20's and families usually do not care or get involved in our relationships. This does not mean that we "sleep around" or are sexually more active than elsewhere, but it is nice to be able to decide about these things - dating, relationships and life in general - on your own. Like when you are getting to know a new person, how wonderfull it is to stay up all night together at home, just talking - no sex - and getting to know eachother better. And no-one cares what your relationship status is (dating, marriage, what-ever), not your parents nor your neighbours. Must say this is one of the best things about living in here! :)
Wow
wow so i move to finland but thats too cold xD
I think because of that (freedom to do what we please) there is no huge pressure about having sex. We can do it if we want to, but there is no "stress" like seems to be in Korea. Building a serious relationship is difficult as it is and even more so if there is no proper place for real intimacy.
Glad to hear that times are changing though!
It’s similar in Germany.
Considering how old you are, it’s not even a problem to bring your boy-/girlfriend home or for a sleep over.
In general the parents from girls are a little bit more protective, but still moderate.
As an Asian living with my parents but living in a 'western' country I never understood. I am an adult but I still have to 'ask' permission...
I'm 25 and from Argentina. I think nowadays living with our parents is getting more common again but because rent is super expensive and unemployment is getting worse, so you have a lot of people in their 30's and more going back to live with their family because we can't afford to live alone.
BTW I just found your channel and I love seeing someone talking so openly and honest about Korea!
30s? I'm from Argentina and most my friends and I are in our 30s and we live alone. 20s is okay still. But 30s feels very weird unless some exceptional situation.
@@camdelg1 Many people I have met at University had to go back to live with their parents either because they broke up with their partner and no longer could afford living alone or because they lost their job and so could no longer pay rent and all the services. (Me encanta que somos de Argentina pero hablamos en Ingles jajaja)
Sad but true
Yap but that is because the economy, most of people here prefer living alone after 20' and most of the families are ok with that. Culturally is nothing wrong with living alone or live with your boyfriend/girlfriend.
Como sea, esperemos que todo mejore, la veo difícil... Pero esperemos.
That means dating in Korean culture not that much different from India. Forget parents we even live with our father and mother in law after marriage. Bringing boys to home is like a big decision for us and get ready to answer your parents QS's. It's an Asian thing but time is changing and so does the mentality of the parents also.
Yah that's so true . Aleast for 1 or 2 years we girls have to live with our in-laws...
Haaaahaaa LoL 😂😂😂😂 you are right even whenever I talked or hangout with my guy friends my dad always asked me who's that guy, what's his name etc,😂😂 like chill dad I am not dating him
We can't even save the no. Of a guy in our contact list..... OR we have to give so many answers to the question of our parents
@@samsonmasih3380 LoL 😂😂😂 you are right everytime my mom and dad sees the name in the phone of my guy friends, they started to ask me million questions 😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅( like chill your daughter ain't gonna runaway with a guy )
@@utpaladas9243 most importantly dad gives that look when they see your guy friend, I mean that expression is priceless.
So does this confirm some scenes we see in kdramas are true about Korean culture.l am talking about couples going to cafes,kiss ,walk and get back to their homes ?
Yep exactly hahaha
But k dramas not real I think, what do u mean by saying that the scenes we see in kdrama is true
@@zinebzineb5503 of course dramas are not 100% real, but SOME aspects of it are based on real life (in whatever culture the drama is from)
I'm not korean but most Asian think of such scene is a normal scene to see. We just gotta back home at night, some parents even being strict about the maximum time
obviously! kdramas does show certain things about korea that are true and relatable.. a person with eyes would know..😂😂😂
Do women not move into places with other female roommates until they are married? In my experience, it was a good way to gain independence from parents while having roomies who looked after one another. It felt safer, too... plus, the added benefit of splitting living expenses.
it depend.... in the end they had to growth... whatever the cost...
Well for me I'd rather move into places alone. Bec I'm not comfortable living with other people and always had a hard time dealing with them. Maybe bec I'm introverted. Lol!
@@wakiwaki491 same when I was 20 I moved directly into my own apartement. Never regretted it.
Why is this video so ture n real 😭😭
In India we can't even make a boyfriend 😭😭😭😭😭
Yah in india , parents don't like if their daughter is dating or something like that ..they would oppose .
@Shivangi I'm not showing the bad side I'm just telling the truth. N yaa our country has too many rape cases so our parents don't allow us to date . But it's like don't u think they r too protective 😅
@Shivangi yeah🙁
How do you "make" a boyfriend?
@@roshnik5137 ok what should I say then
Its weird how different it is... Im from Germany, and my family is polish. its normal to get your own apartment (or with your partner) in your 20s. Also my mother says to me "Better dont marry anyone, you will just regret it in 20years" haha
We get it, you are lucky, no need to show off
@@roshnik5137 stop being a wet blanket
Yeah hahaha
mine is somewhat the same, even though people from our nationality are very conservative and close minded. ig i should be glad haha
I am also from Germany and half of my friends are my age around 19-23 and already have kids but aren't married
I haven't even had a boyfriend yet and I am 22 years old but now my parents want me to find someone and get married
I am from a Christian family my parents are Nigerians and I was born and raised in Germany sooo yeah
I need to get married fast so that I can 😏🤭
To me all of this sounds normal as a christian latin girl lol.
Fun fact: most traditional cultures are pretty much the same.
For real 😂💜
I'm over here thinking "wow this sounds Mexican to me"
same but i’m muslim african
I mean, I personally choose to wait for things until marriage, but that’s just it. It’s my own personal choice. I feel like couples should have the freedom to choose what works best for them.
That said, thanks for this video, it’s interesting to see glimpses into what it’s like to live in Korea.
Korean and indians have so much in common like both of our cultures are conservative... They have similar languages (like many similar words)...similar food tastes both like spicy foods n now dating norms too....anyways i really love ur channel.... Love from INDIA.... 언니를 사랑해💜💜
because both koreans and indians are asian, different asian cultures have a lot of similarities.
In America they make fun of you if you still live at home in your 30s... really anything past like 24.
Anything past 22.
Which is such a contradiction considering the media shows how so many Americans can't afford to pay rent, or bills while their income remains flat. Freedom from parents is cool, but financial freedom is cooler.
Non Latinos will do that in America, but if your Latino that’s normal for us.
Raquel Figueroa interesting. i did not know that. i know the chinese often have there entire extended family including granparents etc.. in one house.
imagine finishing college at the age of 22 with 100k in debt and not living with your parents haha
Glad to see, that you are gaining a lot of traction nowadays. You knew how to adjust to the current circumstances. You have the intelligence and the determination. If you weren't that lazy, you could be conquering space. Watch out! Don't heart this by mistake and then unheart it like the last time. I could misinterpret it. Talking about determination, I am determined aswell. I just want that one cheesecake. And I know I will get it.
Can't tell if we are talking about parners or actual cheesecake. This man has neither. :( Now I want both.
Uhh this is creepy and threatening and confusing
Jina is so funny while being honest. The korean culture is kind of similar to our indian culture. Suprising.
Make more videos like this please, and some with your puppy.
Well.. asian culture in general (yes I'm also from india)
How are you Jina? I'm so happy cause this is the first time I'm so early! Hope you, your family, and your friends are doing well! Thanks for uploading!
Aw thank you! I hope you too 😍
These earrings are so beautiful✨😍 👏
even arabe culture and parents' are like that everything after getting married not before that
we also live with our parents
Of course, i mean read Bukhari on marriage, which basically says the virgin is preferable to the matron (which translates to 2x more dowry). Of course, in such cultures, the non-virgin = matron XD
True👌👌
Wait. There is a difference between arab culture and practicing Islamic religion. When you mentioned bukhari, you refer to the Islamic religion, not the arabic culture.
Also, the vergin thing is not very relevant, and is not linked to the dowry. The point is, its safer for the new family to be stabilised in marriage to be intimate and secure in each other's presence...
Also, that's why it is relatively easy to get married and get divorced through the islamic way in order to discourage intimacy out of wedlock. ..
Just wanted to clarify 💜
@@zahraboudidah9334 I kno. But i feel as if religion affects culture, in a way, especially when its been practised across generations. For example, nowhere in the quran or hadith does it say that the bride price for a vergin is 2x more than a matron, but it is what it is today. Perhaps the religious significance of purity plays a role in the said calculation for the bride price, in cultures where it is practised.
@@MoonCherryLove I think the place depends too. I have no idea were the idea of verginity paying double came from and in which country this is being practiced. But in the middle east, a woman's dowry is expensive. Period. That's not right by any means, but virginity really doesn't really play a role. Also, how can you enforce that a woman is in fact a virgin? These things should be between the couple only.
It's true that today a lot of culture and religion is mixed. However, the lines are clear between religion and culture for any that care to look.
All I am saying is that it's not always right to mix everything under one category and give it an unflattering label just because some people are too lazy to understand the intricacies of the subject..
I traveled abroad , and lived with my korean ex girlfriend and I’m shocked it’s a taboo. Our entire relationship was a taboo it seems by korean standards and it was a disaster.
Bryceton LeFlore I think not everyone care wether it’s taboo or not.
There was a Korean advertisement that dealt with Korean dates and it said date course is one of the three:
1. Restaurant- cafe -movie
2. movie -restaurant- cafe
3. Restaurant -movie -cafe
(Just joking though. It is so much fun to live in Korea as there are so many inside entertainment places as well :))
Han River picnic ;-)
Don't you have any other fun places to go there? Like music concerts, arts exhibitions, food festivals?? You can get creative, you know...
@@mssj8z Or practice a sport together, take a hobby class, etc..
No matter how many times I hear or witness this, it just makes me laugh so much to the point of crying, #OnlyAsianknows
asians arent the only conservative people lol, most cultures are like that outside of Americans lol
@@JustinK0 And outside of Europeans.
Guys asking if you live alone reminded me of EXID's Ah Yeah with the creepy guy whispering "Where do you live? Do you live alone?".
Same
It is also like in the philippines. But now is changing. But still there are families who still stick to the old ways conservative
You are also exposing indians....🇮🇳💜🇰🇷.......(no hate please)
Three hours are enough for a lot of couples to do the deed! Definitely interesting and entertaining to hear you speak about some unique things about Korean dating culture. Keep up the great content 🙌💯💃🕺
It may be enough to do the deed, but it is not enough to take your make-up off apparently, or to see if your partner is a tidy person or leaves his or her dirty socks and underwear lying around...
I don't know what deed you trying saying but it enough for the deed to be done in 5 minute.
i can go for 1 shot per hour....
Some deed is done in 30 seconds
Intimacy and intercourse are two different thing.
You actually have a loooot of places for dates!! A lot of different cute places with a bench and a wonderful view on the sunset over the city, without anyone! I am always chocked about the fact that no korean go there for dates
Now I see why Koreans think many American girls are "easy"... a very different cultures!!
Our 1st daughter is 21yrs, and she lives by herself and just started working.
I'm from Argentina, and here no one really cares about the status of your relationship i mean they do but is just a gossip thing and in the end it doesn't really matter ... Most of parents are aware that their children are sexually active when they get into their 20s. It's pretty common in people around 30s that they live with their significant others, even getting married is actually weird lol and the people who are, usually do it bc of paperwork or for having a party lol (or very religious people) but they do it after a long long time of living together... NO ONE (very religious people are the exception) here thinks about marrying someone that you have never live with.
My grandma said to me once "don't do serious relationships until you finish studying, just do your thing with men and let them go quickly" LMAO
Well now I’m grateful I don’t live there
@@bleach2618 I'm grateful too that you don't live here
@@camdelg1 LMAO
And just for the record is not like no one here gets married, there are a lot of people that choose to do it for love or any reason ... what i meant is that in here there is not much pressure about getting married or about not having sex outside marriage, i feel like you got more room to hve a CHOICE if u want to or not ... and i'm sure (like all places around the globe) that there are still some people in here that don't think that way,... I just wanted to describe what is the thinking on these issues in general
if ppl have getting active in sexual stuffs they will get HPV lol even they use candom!!so i think its more better ppl have one partner in their life
Petition for jina start her own Netflix series 💞Ⓜ️
Ireland was similar to that in the 90's. It was completely taboo to live together before marriage (in the country side at least).
I think it's beautiful that you chose to be honest with your parents and explained how you felt about the topic 💜
In Brazil we have love motels too and some of us still live with our parents even though we're in our 30's, it's pretty common to live with our parents until we get married but most of the parents are open to their kids relationships, unfortunately I wasn't born in that kind of a family, my family is pretty conservative.
@@vivianla9085 the conservative families yes, especially if they are from church(idk if this make sense in english, i hope so lol) and if its a girl but is kinda normal do before the marriage
The average age to lose the virginity is 17 yrs old
I like living in a Conservative family i mean like save it after marriage yk
In my country courtship is the first stage( to show how serious you are and it can be considered as dating). you have to court a girl to get her sweet "yes" and if she says yes to you then it is the only time where you became a official bf/gf. During courtship, it is the time of getting to know each other and having a deep feelings with each other. In that stage kissing and touching each other is not allowed( to show respect to the girl) . Once the girl allow you to hold her hands it is a sign where the girl is almost saying yes or almost accepting a guy as her bf. Courtship almost last for 2 months or a year depends to a girl. Before you start to court a girl, the guy should ask permission to the parents of a girl and that is the first meeting of a guy and the parents of a girl, and after that, the boy should presents the girl to his parents and family as well. it is formality to show respect to their parents (By the way i experienced to court a girl for almost 1 yr. Bef. We became official as a couple). The bf/gf stage is a second then it will level up to proposal where a guy asking a girl to be his wife it usually last for a months or a year ( it depends to a couple when will be they getting married).
My parent warning us, sibling, not to dating anyone during my school day. Then, my brother got a girlfriend and since that day, they keep warning us not to dating anyone until I got into college, they said "when you at college, don't ever find a boyfriend/girlfriend because you still young(18 at that time and now I'm 20)". So, I said "Don't worryyy. I won't marry to anyone till I die. I'll be single forever". My parent: *silent
Me: *smiling
Also which is why I never attracted to anyone and game addict(They mad at us for playing game everyday. I guess they forgot that they the one who 'inspired' us to play game cuz it too troublesome to take care of an eldest son, a twin and a lil son cuz our gap aren't that big.) There's one time they ask me what type of man I like, I said no one. Silent back again~
Exactly! I was discussing a personal matter with my bf which I had to keep secret since we live far apart and we both gotta finish school and all, my grades are probably the best out of my siblings, I listened the most and never disrespected my parents, so I don't understand why there's so overprotective. They saw our texts while I was using the bathroom, maybe if I closed my door nothing would've happened. But they have the audacity to tell me he's a distraction, I literally text everyone when I'm done with homework, I feel more focused with online school then I did before that! He even helped me with summer school so? They want me to not sleep with ANYONE before marriage, but I have 2 older sisters who did that with more than 1 person, tbh I'm kinda shocked they're able to keep up with jobs, my mom always makes sour comments referencing to teen pregnancy. My sisters had their first kids at my age, I haven't even introduced any guy friends lmao, I don't even hang out with girl friends outside of school hours. I'd love to shock them like that but I'm bisexual so idk what to do lmao
I love talking about Korean culture with my non-Korean friends and I also bring up these topics in my English discussion classes with my Korean students.
It's really a good conversation starter. Love this topic! Thanks for sharing! I can look up more of the issues you brought up and start up some good conversation :)
When we travelled in Korea it was great there were so many cheap hotels, we didn't know it was a love motel or not so we stayed in some for sure, sometimes asked to see the room first so we knew what we were paying for. Some funny surprises, heart shaped bed, blacklight erotic pictures on the wall, the clear bathroom wall so you always see the person in the bathroom. A red light we could not figure our how to turn it off that made it hard to sleep. The cheaper room was more normal lol Most of them were normal just with lots of floral patterns on the wall and curtains. But I am very glad we could afford to travel because we did not have much money, and we were there to explore all the tourist attractions and mountains and have fun.
Everyone’s talking about her avoiding the ”sex” word and every Asian parents relate to what she’s saying about them but I’m sitting here confused on how she’s 31 and looks like a goddess
In my country “motel” is always “love motels”. But the options for the time you can spend in there is bigger.
I was always quite interested in how real life really looks in Korea as opposed to the K-Dramas I watch. From a perspective of a westerner I’m sometimes a bit shocked how unnatural dating really feels in Korea but in a way I can understand the more conservative approach as well. We westerners unfortunately pushed sexual freedom to the extreme and I guess adopting certain Korean standards would do our society good. The key is to find that balance when we have freedom to explore our sexuality before we get married but in the same time we know there are lines we shouldn’t cross.
not only korean but asian standards in general
lmao no we shouldn't, what standards? being sexist and shame women for being sexual? lol nah
Jina, I love your earrings and outfit! My parents think like that too. I agree with you that a couple should live together first before marrying to see if it works out.
I DIED laughing at the frog room😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣
It's so bold for someone to talk about their culture esp the love, daring and Sex. An eye opener 😂
FINALLY a frank discussion about sexuality in Korea! Thanks 😊 The k-dramas drive me crazy waiting for 20 episodes for them to have one innocent looking kiss!
If I am a man, I'd be your boyfriend. I love that you're brutally honest and confident! Love that! 💜🤧
I've been with my boyfriend (Korean) for almost a year now, and hoo boi, the "no privacy no intimacy unless you go to a motel" is soooo rough... like you said in the video, it's not just about sexual stuff, but we can't just hang out and watch a movie in bed or peacefully spend the night together unless we're ready to make the trip to a motel and pay for it... we're both university students and live in the dormitories, so there's never a chance for privacy anywhere unless we go to a motel :(
The fact that what she says is exactly like the arabic culture too 😂
While she was talking all i could see were the earrings, like, they are so cool 😍
Also, in Latin America is the complete opposite to everything you just said, i guess parents are more open to those stuffs 🤷🏼♀️
Not sure what part of Latin America you're from but there are a ton of conservative Latin American cultures
Really cause I’m Latina and everyone i know is Latino too and it’s really similar to Koreans. Especially the older generations are super close minded
@@stay-fm really? Oh well i guess is just in my country then 🤷🏼♀️ or atleast for what i know people are not that conservative in Argentina 🤔
I’m a Mexican and I can relate all that too 😭
One question: Is that the same with males in Korea? I mean, Do Korean parents see it right or normal when is about males?
Its understandable. I'm 29 and still living with my family. Asian family in America still the same. XD
I'm Russian and thanks for USSR influence,our parents(I'd say more like grand-parents) are conservative too. I'm lucky because my parents don't think like "oh my god she has a boyfriend,why they can't get married?",but they still are a bit conservative,homophobic and etc. I hope in future generations thing would be better. :)
this channel help me a lot to increase my English listening very well, bcs ur english language is very clear to understand without subtitle
In the Kdrama “It’s okay not to be okay” there’s a love motel scene
I just watched that scene. It was hilarious 😂
Hi Jina.. i love how the way you think.. I am Indonesian. Actually, Korean parents same to Indonesian parents mostly. But I personally have mindset like yours. Open minded. Nice to know u Jina
I'm from a small European country and we have cafes everywhere hahaha. I've been to Seoul and there is not as many cafes like there are in my city hahaha. And the reason is not like - we have to have a place to date. It's just that we like to sit there and drink coffee with friends/parents/partners... but mostly friends...
In my country kids move out when they go to university. It depends if you go to another city or not... But I'd say at least 50% of the young people go to universities in another cities. Then they live in dorms or apartments with roomates - so they kinda have a place to go to with their boyfriends/girlfriends.
But even though a lot of people move out we have cafes EVERYWHERE. Literally one next to another lmao.
Love your hair and style dear. You mentioned that you were bullied a lot because of your looks so I am sending you positive thoughts 😍
This is making me realize how open my parents are. As a korean who grew up abroad, I always saw my parents as strict compared to my “western” friends’ parents but they’ve always been open to me having a boyfriend since high school. They even let me go on vacation with him although my dad is always a little wary. In fact, my mother always said it’s dumb to wait until marriage because how can you know you’re suitable. Of course that being said, she would never approve me going around different men 🤣 Now I’m so thankful for my parents, I can’t imagine dating and having to do things behind my parents’ backs or trying to go to love motels
Im happy for you to have parents who are willing to be open minded
Im happy for you to have parents who are willing to be open minded
Really different dating culture!
I'm from Sweden and I had my first boyfriend when I was 15 and he visited me and my family and we were spending nights ourselves together in my room. So I started my dating life at that time.
My parents didn't care what I was doing, unless I knew what I was doing. It was all my choices and I knew I had their support if anything happens.
I moved out from my parents when I was 19, to my own apartment and even that was my choice.
I met my husband when I was 20, we dated a few months before I told my parents about him. After 5 months of dating I moved to him. We were living together for many years and got two kids before we decided to getting married. So 13 years after we first met, we got married.
To swedes, it's common for couples being unmarried and just living together when they got kids. Even my parents were not married when I was born in the 80's.
So when I saw this video about korean dating culture, I thought it was an interesting topic.
if they got grand child... they don't care about you... What bullshit in any culture... it just their bullshit to get in kid's head...
@@campkira What do you mean?
The sexual education here in Sweden is good, so the youth people know about safe sex, condoms and birth control pills and things like that. I knew that already before middle school. Youth people can get those without the parents knowledge. So it's good.
We all know that youth people does have sex, so knowledge about safe sex is important!!
It's exactly like that in Turkey...
As a Filipino, one of our core values in gratitude and familial piety. Which is why we stay with our parents until we get married. Its a way of "giving back" to our parents for all those years of their hardwork and sacrifice to take care of us and send us to school. Its not like the family is oblidging us to give back, but it feels like an innate duty.
Hi Jina. I'm from Brazil, I'm 30 and I still live with my parents. Here there are some things that are similar to Korea. For example: the guys like when the girl lives alone because this way it's easier to have sex with her. But at the same time when you still live with your parents after being 25 people think you are a baby girl and spoilled.... So, it's difficult. When you live with your parents you have to inform when you go out and the time you're going to come back home. In my case, I can't sleep with my boyfriend (in his house or in a motel). I can go there but I have to come back home after sometime. About having sex before getting married it's not a problem for them (my parents). I can talk openly with my mother. They are a little conservative in some aspects but in this specific aspect they are cool. They are like: please girl, have sex before getting married... You have to know good things in life without being in a marriage 😂😂😂😂 I agree with you about the fact that the girl can pay the motel. Afterall they both are using the space and they both are in love (or not). And since nowadays women can work, can pay for their own bills and can spend their money with whatever they want, they can also pay the motel. Btw, I love your videos very much!!!! 😘😘
Brazilian here! I totally relate to that!
I'm brazilian aswel and its the same for me. Except for the parents being ok with sex before marriage, I've never talked about it with them. Since they don't even let me spend the night at my boyfriend's house, I can assume that they don't approve it. (I'm 27, by the way, of course I already had sex. I think they live in denial Hahahahaha)
Eu estava esperando um comentário brasileiro que notasse as semelhanças também 😂😂
Apesar que é bem comum um casal morar junto sem estarem oficialmente casados por aqui do que lá.
You are super pretty and funny. I'm also 31 and single in Korea. Haha. But Korea feels ultra lonely to me... Your video encouraged me actually.
I can't even imagine having to ask my parents permission for anything in my 20's!
Lol really? I don't believe you
@@btsforever5791 Why not? I'm 23 and I can do what I want. My parents are happy if I ask their opinion but I don't have to. A lot of people live in happy relationships together in their early 20's, completely free from their parents. This is how it works most of the countries in Europe.
@@Anna-gv2lb You westerners are SOOO lucky. You have so much freedom, it surprises us Asians. Our parents, relatives who we don't even know, and the whole society controls our lives. We can't even step out of the house without someone blowing up, we can't choose our careers, we can't even marry anyone with our choice. Our families and the people around us make our life decisions, we have no choice but to obey them💔
I stopped asking my parents permission for anything when I was 14. I moved out to live with my friend and lived exactly how I wanted. As an adult I have a good friendship with my parents, I’m more mature than they ever were. I am always surprised by the restriction of other cultures.
@Alexis Fitzroy we are literally, literally puppets
Greetings from Czech republic. I have to say that in my country it's a total opossite.
We are moving away from our parent's house usually after finishing high school, so about 18/19 years and we get jobs, go to universities and so on.
And it's actually considered very weird if a couple decide to get married without living together.
It's really rare.
People should first get to know each other, then get to know each other on a intimate level because without that, you don't know if you are compatible. Then living together and after some time get married.
I can't talk for all parents, but usually parents don't really interfere with there kids lives and it's not weird to share our personal life with our parents.
In my opinion it's better, because we learn to be responsible and independent.
I think that's one of the biggest things western culture is different in dating. We would just be friends at first meet each other going somewhere to eat some icecream etc. Where I live (near the blackforest in germany) you could say lets take a walk in the forest and enjoy the beautiful scenery. Maybe If you are more introverted you meet in your room earlier. I mean we would just ask hey wanna come over we could watch some movies. Of course there are parents beeing protective, but I think my parents and even the person I'm only Dating would feel better if I just say lets go to my house instead of hey lets go to a love motel. I think I would Sound like I really have a big need for sexual interactions.
But it's really funny and interesting to see the smallest differences in cultures. :D
I honestly love your channel so much, its so entertaining to me💖
It's the same with indian culture! Indian and Korean culture is very similar! Still up to date indians women also face this issue! It's a very judgmental society that we live in! And harsh reality how women still face discrimination, inequality and inequity till now
How women get judged by society are largely different from men and is not fair at all. Hi 🇮🇳from India too...
@@vanlaldikiralte5079 true! Women are still judged everywhere!
Yes , they are judged.
I definitely don't want to stay in India
@@ayonticabanerjee8326 it's your choice and your decision! Wherever u go there are going to be issues everywhere! Wishing you good luck and all the best in ur path of journey wherever ur destiny and ur choices takes u too!
Thanks for sharing this! I'm Canadian, and I know each country is a bit different, but my parents are very conservative, and they have most of these same expectations. When I was in university, they didn't even want me visiting my male friends' apartments on my own, or talking to random people in the mall, for fear that I'd get a "bad reputation". Personally, I'm waiting 'til marriage, but these expectations are difficult!
I stay with my parents because it is cheaper overall, and a great way to take care of my parents at their age.
Yes, I pay for most things at home.
Every Latino can relate to this, we might be in our 30’s but we will still live with our parents and they will still us as their babies.
As an Asian-American guy who's 34, single, and living at "home" right now, I don't know if I'll ever "do the deed" with any girl before marriage... I just haven't met a girl where I WANT to "do" her, yet... Haha. (I have high standards BTW.)
Thats ok dont do it with someone youre not comfortable with. Many ppl out there are actually saving themselves for marriage.
I love your earrings!!
Wow, my boyfriends parents must be pretty cool! I lived with him before I left Korea, and every time I visit his mother is happy for me to go see him, we also went on a vacation together and they didn't mind, maybe they're cooler about it since he's a guy, but I always had the idea that they were very conservative haha
pretty sure it would have been a taboo if the genders were reversed. (male, non korean; female, korean)
most asian countries are patriarchal
@@pelizafaith yeah but also most Asian parents are pretty conservative!
Watching jina's videos are informative,funny and scary in the same time..lots of sarangheyoo unnie!😂😂❤
I'm shocked that Indian culture is same as Korean.... But the thing is that we are not having motels .... But the parents a d the culture is same
Korea is a first world country and India is..........
we're all asian... my arab friends like that. i am chinese...
Ummmm who said India doesn't have motels or hotels? Trust me people will find a way....
@@beautydiva110 they have hotels but I think so that motels are the other thing 😅
@@samsonmasih3380 honestly it's the same thing.... Probably a lot going on in hotels too.... No one's gonna announce what their doing 🤷🏽♀️
This moving out of the family home thing is a modern phenomena. Anyone in the US studying their family history can easily see this. Even though I did it (leave the home), I've since become critical of the practice. There is politics behind it.
I think she needs to research something about her parents generation. Love motels existed back then as well, and people had a lot of sex also. It just was something that wasn't talked about in society or people would lie about it.
German parents usually don't care except if they are very religious, which isn't the norm where I live. My mom taught me important things about the topic of sex and intimacy when I was a teenager so I knew about all those things even before I got into my first relationship at 18. She never cared if I have sex as long as I feel comfortable and not pressured and as long as I am in a happy and healthy relationship. She checks in from time to time to ask if everything is ok between me and my boyfriend to make sure I'm still happy. She just wanted me to wait with sleeping over at his place for 3 months, because I wasn't on birth control yet back then, and she also said I should make sure that he is the one I want to have my first time with. She also thinks it's important to have sex before marriage because only then you can know if you're sexually compatible. If it turns out you aren't sexually compatible after you've married it can lead to many relationship problems.
All my friends including me regularly sleep over at their boyfriends/girlfriends place or the other way around. That's totally normal. I also went on two vacations with my boyfriend and I'm only 20 😂 my friends also do that.
Sounds like 20 years ago in Japan. Quite strict. Actually, less and less are interested in physical relationships, even if they live on their own.
Jina, I do not watch your videos in almost a year, and I come back, and, it’s the same Jina Kim, funny, honest, confident, brave, kind, attractive, appealing, and many other attributes, just a good person. It would be fun to date you, outside of Korea of course. Your parents would not approve of my culture, or, maybe they would, hard to say. Anyway, I wish you the best Jina Kim, hope this crisis doesn’t stop you from looking for the one, I hope you find him soon.
As an indian we can relate these things. And most important think most of the asian parents are just same 😅.
I agree, people need to live together before marriage, is the only way to know the good and bad habits of the significant other and just to make sure that you both are committed and compatible. No surprises.
I think its just Asian culture lolol bc my parents reacted the same way too and I had to explain to them that its new generation and its not like I'm out and about with a stranger. I've been with the same person for 6yrs now so it should be fine to travel with him.
its not, most cultures in the world were like that, these days its pretty much only american that has changed.
This is really strange and rediculous too. No one has to spend nights together to know eachother perfectly. If someone really cares about his/her partner then some meetings with each other again and again in a peaceful environment is enough. They can get enough time to share eachother's thoughts And it's only possible if both of them are truly interested in each other and serious for their relationship. It's my opinion. i really don't want to hurt or judge anyone.
I love you Jina❤️and love your videos too❤️
I read that single korean ladies in their 30s-40s are happy staying single. Edit: I think its the fact they like to live alone and then dating comes last.
@Mitch 1066 Can't understand how some women can accept to have spent about the half of their lives studying in order to have a decent job and then they drop everything when they just start working for the family and the husband
I’ve heard the same. Living alone is becoming much more common among women. Its a super popular RUclips trend to talk about your life alone
Hey jina kim, it’s the same here too . Girls and boys live with their parents before marriage .. and in our case it’s the parents who bring the marriage proposals through mariage institutions, relatives , friends and then u meet the person first in cafe a few times and then both the families meet . It’s pretty much the same here . It’s just that we don’t have love motels here ..
"Future boyfriend" is the new quote of the day
With my partners, I really like to share almost everything about me LOL I do this because I really want someone to love me for who I am. I can’t imagine marrying someone if I didn’t feel emotionally close with them.
31! You could pass for early twenties easily in the U.S.
Turkish people think EXACTLY like that! It‘s just soo unfair because when it comes to men the parents don’t say anything at all but when it comes to girls NOTHING is allowed! Not sleeping together before marriage, living together, traveling together etc. it‘s sooo bad! I really hate it! But I think korean people are not as strict as Turkish people but still I never understood this culture...
A very well made video Jina. Really interesting to watch even for an "outsider". I am going to Seoul next year for 6 month for language study primly. Dating the local girls there is not on my priority list. But if I am still single then in 2021 and if I get the chance to date I would not say no but is not a topic I think much about. Your video was still very enjoyable to. It was well presented with many interesting info. Keep up your great work.
The reality is that issues like living together before getting married or having relationships in addition to honorifices is something that is the same throughout the world, the same in Asia as in the West. The difference is that Asia continues to apply it and sometimes exaggerated it in certain countries. However in the West many places no longer apply (use) it and only use it when they are in the work area or special occasions.
Aww you are so sweet.. I subscribed immediately 🌸
I loved this, it is so interesting! More videos like this please!!!! ❤
Hi u r looking soo beautiful
Love from India ❤
Concerning datin and marriage, Americans used to have the same ideas, perceptions, and opinions as today's traditional/older Korans about dating, pre-marital sex, and unmarried couples living together. Those attitudes were reflected in American TV shows and movies which further maintained and reinforced that conservative viewpoint. I have been watching a lot of Kdramas and K-movies. These Korean media portrayals of how couples meet, interact, and spend private time together are very similar to what dating and marriage was like in America in the 1950s - 1960s. Another aspect of examining this topic is the difference between Korea's family-oriented cultural norms versus Western-European-American family relationships. For example, many Korean dramas and movies portray arranged marriages. That very rarely, if at all, happens in America. My understanding is that Koreans are raised in a culture based on Confucian concepts of community and family duty-loyalties and cooperation with societal norms. In contrast, Americans adhere to the concept of individualism and personal freedom. This individualism is reflected in how a person meets, chooses to date and marry another. Of course, Americans hope that their families, relatives and friends will support them and give their approval of the chosen person, but that is not a factor that will solidify or break the couple's choice to be with each other. Interestingly, the American divorce rate is still rather high....about 43% (per the 43 states that reported this statistic in 2023). Whatever and whichever way you "make your bed and sleep in it", it is an individual's sole responsibility to either stay in a relationship/marriage or terminate the relationship. You choose; not your prospective partner, not your parents, not your grandparents, not your employer, not your friends. It is all up to you.
I’m English live in America and am 73 so I think I have quite a wide knowledge. Brave you for saying the things you have said. At 15 English girls are a lot of time sexually active even in my time. Less then than now. I feel like it’s important not to get a social disease or get pregnant but other than that sex is a normal part of life. Love you you brave girl but 31 is a time for reproducing IF you want a family. 💜🧡❤️
Well no shade or anything but if someone wants a family adoption can be considered too
@@taylorswiftie3069 helo my fellow swiftie🥲💕
@@jojoshaokipts6023 hello!
actually on certain aspects it's not that different here in italy, i think it's because the age where young people are actually able to buy their house or live alone got delayed by job issues and low salaries...so private time with your partener are not that usual or easy to have (especially if your parents don't work anymore so they are always at home).