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Will Your Long-Distance Relationship Work? Ask These 4 Questions (Matthew Hussey)
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- Опубликовано: 6 авг 2024
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If you find yourself currently in a long-distance relationship - or “situationship” - then I made this video for you, my loyal friend.
In it, I give you the 4 questions you should ask to figure out if it’s all worth it. Because let’s face it, long-distance relationships are HARD. WORK.
They require dedication, commitment, loyalty, and a real vision for the future. Do you ever find yourself worrying if yours has what it takes? Or wondering if the person you are giving all of this mental and emotional energy to from afar is actually serious and will pay off in the end, instead of wasting your precious time?
You can also check out this video to see my “baby” brother Harry say some deeply hurtful things to me. Enjoy.
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I was in a LDR for 3 years (12 hs flight away). In my experience, communication and deadlines are key. We are finally together and been married for almost 2 years now. There will be ups and downs, but you can make it if they are the right person ❤️
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is gone
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he helped me get my ex also can help you immediately he have solutions to all problems.
Text him on what'sapp
Totally agree!! It's bloody hard but not impossible 🙌❤
Oh so happy for you both! I too in long distance for 3 years now. Hopefully we get to meet soon
It can work only if there's a deadline for stopping being long distance and clear plans/goals for future together.
He gave me 2 to 3 years, should i wait for him?
@@violetmujeres1034 I spent 4 years in long distance just to find out that he changed his perspective on life and has completely no goals for future. My advice is to only believe in his actions, not what he's saying.
@@violetmujeres1034 Only if he gives u 1 week - 1 month visits per year...
@@violetmujeres1034 2/3 years?? Do you know him well?? Who is going to pay bills?? Did you spend time together at least 8,9 months?
Guess this is the untold reason that mine didn't work even though we tried...
The efficiency of this almod cybergenius is next level. To juggle walk throughs of various angles on the topic delivered to-camera, differnet content per topic from various folks underneath the umbrella of the track list of the larger big band concert itself is engaging and refined. To help gain phone access like this is really something. Awesome work!!
this same almods revealed my bf phone activities when i was in a LDR, thanks for saving me from that liar👏
Thanks to Almond for exposing more cheaters, after using his service i realized there are genius amongst us
almodd also allowed me on my wife's Phone revealing everything I needed to see remotely
Hey, almondcybergenius online! I just wanted to drop by and shower you with some virtual love and appreciation! You guys are like the fairy godmothers of truth, waving your digital wands and making all the lies disappear. Thank you for being my rock when everything else seemed to crumble. You're the real MVPs for LDR!!!!!
i don't get how did they help you?
they gave me full phone access to my partne'r in LDR and saved me from the liar!!
wow that must be cool, can i see their details pls🙏
ok, allgenues
@ G M a l l .
It's like the timing of his videos are eerily accurate
Tell me about it....
I agree 100% he's a psychic
No cap
Hell Yes omfg
Right. 🧐 He is tapped to the collective❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️🥰💯♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️
I've learned from my last relationship, which was long distance, that if a person likes you, they will invest time to set aside to not only talk on the phone but also video chat as much as possible. They will want to see your reactions to the topics that get brought up. And after getting to know someone well enough where there is a certain level of trust built, having video chats in the park, sending photos of areas where they live and showing the inside of their home or apartment. All you have at that point is a phone and video. But there has to be a natural progression towards meeting in real life and each person has to be actively talking about it on their own without being asked. Open communication is essential. Never accept a person leaving you to wonder where you stand with them or who they are as a person. And the one thing I've learned from watching Matthew's videos over the years is make sure they are investing in you. And visa versa. 😊💛
I totally agree, there absolutely has to be a mutual goal to meet in person at some point.
My partner hates videochats though cause he has self image problems. We still talk and play nearly every night and we fly to visit each other once per month
How about not trying to add you in facebook saying he doesn't use it anymore? Is that a red flag?
FaceTime makes me anxious
It can only work if he or she moves to where you are.
Long distance relationships are just as real as the traditional relationship.
If you are both communicating and checking in on a daily basis, doing voice and video calls regularly, occasionally sending letters, cards gifts to each other's homes, having faith and trust in each other (and God if you're both people of faith) being totally open, honest and transparent with each other, loving, respecting and caring for each other, making each other laugh and smile, making sacrifices, talking about the future and are both striving to eventually meet up in person then you are in a real relationship even if the physical side of it is temporarily missing.
There will be people who may try and tell you that your relationship isn't real etc but that's usually because they don't quite understand the dynamics or they're too close minded etc but the good news is they can rationalize, argue and carry on all they like but they DON'T get to define YOUR relationship, only you and your partner do! 💕
Love your words and can relate! My big virtual hug to you.
And just where do you find men like that? Because I have yet to discover one who does all that you say here.
@@LisaGemini The effort comes from BOTH parties not just one.
There are plenty of decent men out there online and in person.
Sel L is definitely an antisocial straight gaslighting everyone 😂 bringing up God, love, etc. Stealing the present moment and ability to live from someone in another state or country and putting their genitals on lay-a-away is a twisted version of love that comes from jealousy and control. Stop romanticizing control.
@@RecreationalUseOnly I'm actually reporting your comment because it borders on defamation.
You don't know anything about me or my life to make that kind of judgement.
I was speaking from my own personal experience from when I was in a long distance relationship.
9 Years in Long Distance, my advice 💞
1.) Trust Each Other
2.) Communicate (Discuss expectations)
3.) Play Questions games like Lovify, to spice things up.
4.) Conflicts are normal (Never threaten to leave)
5.) Call unexpectedly.
6.) Surprise Visits if possible.
What about financial issues? Where one cannot afford to move out because not enough money and moving to another state with no connections can be risky if you can't find a job
@@phurion.If they are worth every effort. Then why not take the leap of faith?
@defender2415 what does that even mean leap of faith, yes take the risk but can't go in blindly and just hope for the best, especially if you're the man you gotta have a plan if worst case scenario you go there and can't find a job
Hm ❤✔ worked with me half way. But not trust and visit bec of the distance was still limited. 🛩
@@phurion.Yoy are the only one who can know if the other person worth all the risk. There are not guarantees, but if you do a good assessment on the value of the relationship, you'll be fine. If you are doubtful, I would recommend not to risk anything. Or you'll end up resentful with them.
I feel so smart..I broke up with this guy because I never saw any action from his side to be together in the future..Only stupid jazzy romantic shit.. So I said the 4 letter magical romantic word..N E X T..!!
If there hasn't been any action or moves to meet in person by the second year then you need to step back, reassess your relationship and go from there.
😣😣.... I'm about to say this too..
It's so draining emotionally..
@@gabriellabronte5053 It certainly can be if you're with the wrong person.
Thank you, next!
Dont be fooled by those actions to meet in person..Thats not enough.. With travel being so popular these days people plan meeting each other in different countries just to enjoy and have a good time together.. But that may not mean anything.. There has to be a concrete plan and action to be with each other..Dreamy promises should not be acceptable..
When I was 16 I met my future husband when he was on school exchange trip in my country . We spent 10 magical days together and then wrote LETTERS and occasional phone calls and met months apart during schoolholidays . when I did my a levels I decided to come to London to do Uni here and we married a year later. The marriage lasted 20 years ..it did woirk for me :)
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is gone
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he helped me get my ex also can help you immediately he have solutions to all problems.
Text him on what'sapp
@@mulogoli6868 I m not looking to get him back. We have new lives now
I'm glad things worked for you.
I’ve never been in a long distance relationship without feeling empty, sad and wanting more. I think some people are more cut out to make them work than others.
So very true !!
Yes especially if Physical Touch is your love language. Due to COVID, I've been so depressed missing my bf. I love him to pieces. I miss him incredibly.
Yes
@@heyitsjujuu you just made me cry!
Exactly this, i just broke up with my bf after 9 months, we've been together in person in a relationship for a 2 months, then he left to his home country Australia and won't be back until borders reopen for them, which could be almost a year from now.
It's so hard. Plus I have sone things I haven't achieved yet regarding my Uni and career, so I'm gonna focus on that, and once the borders are open, we'll meet up. I kinda can't end anything for 100% if it's not in person.
@@ILoveMetalBoys1 I meet my gf through a friend. She is in Laos. We have been dating for 2 years. Covid didn't help. I want to believe her the words and feelings but, it is hard. I honestly believe that it isn't true until two people actually have a physical connection. I just broke up with her last week. 😢
I was in a long distance relationship and we just closed the distance and are getting married soon.
Just like any form of dating it comes down to the persons involved. If both people are putting in the work then a relationship will work.
@ Jazz Up Your Wanderlust Congratulations 👍😊
@@ikyu6791 Thank you!!
@@jasmin.ja.tuomas how long were you long distance?
@@Taikyaa I was in an LDR for 3 1/2 years and just got married to my partner in Jan. Our LDR was international and we had a 7 hour time difference. I chose to move to Finland after saving up a lot of money so we could start our lives together. Are you in an LDR?
@@jasmin.ja.tuomas I've been with my LDR boyfriend for five years now and I'm moving to his state this year at the end of summer. We've met multiple times. It's been an adventure with him and I'm excited for the next chapter in our relationship and lives.
I came to US in 2018 with a student program and met a guy. We were roommates. In those 4 months we became very good friends and we both felt that there’s something more than just friendship. But, it’s also hard to convince that, because it’s responsibility for a long distance relationships. Eventually one week before my flight we started dating and promised to love each other. That’s not easy, especially when there’s some language, culture and time zone differences. But we live in a great time when there are so many social media platforms which makes things easier. We had plans and it helped us a lot. I am not originally from Russia, I was living and studying there. I’m muslim person and my relatives were against my relationships with “non muslim” person. So there were lots of other issues going on. Wasn’t easy at all. But I made a decision that if he will fly to Russia to see me, then it worth fighting for my love and being together. And He did! In April 2019 we spent 1 week of vacation in Saint Petersburg. It was our 6 months anniversary. Then I graduated my school and I found an internship in US. And in 6 months we met each other again. He lived in WI , my internship was in GA. Big difference, huh? But even then he proved his love, he left his school and job, relatives and met me at the Atlanta airport. I did the same sacrifices, I had to go against my parents to be with him( you understand me if you have strict asian parents) , against my religion. Leave my country and my friends. Leave all the perspectives. And start everything over.
And you know what?! I’m happily married! He’s graduating his school this year, he found a great job here.
But back then I watched so many videos about long distance relationships. You will have people tell you to start looking at “real guys” to stop living in your fairytale. But you listen to your heart and look at his actions. You will have to work together but it will make you so much stronger in the future. We became closest people to each other, best friends and of course we’re good team. Good luck and I think my story will give you some hope. Hope - that’s all you need😌
What a great story! Congrats to you and your beau for making it work. This gives me hope!
Did your husband became a muslim?
Hi Q.K. Thank you for sharing a positive and lovely story. I am in a long distance relationship with my friend of 8 years. We started talking 4 months ago as a couple. We haven’t got any concrete plans yet as how to be together in the future but I’m meeting him in less than 2 months. Sometimes I question myself, will it work or am I wasting my time or what am I doing with my life and all. We are of same religion but different nationalities, my parents may not approve of him, very likely. But I am running the risk because I am following my intuition. It’s not always easy because we are so far and we are dealing with our own life issues. But reading your story lifted up my hope, so thanks a lot and congratulations for your successful love story
omgg this story so lovely n inspiring for me. Thank uuuuu
@@nandamaharjan2985 Hello Nanda, we will never know until we try. I know you will have ups and downs , it is normal to question yourself, your decision. if both sides committed and truly believe in the future together - there is no stopping you. It is a great gift to meet someone that you actually love and be loved.You will be surprised how many people made the wrong choice "choosing the right person ONLY logically".
By the way about parents... if your parents see that he makes you happy and that you are glowing with him - they will love him. Every parent's dream - to see their child to be happy. Thats what happened to me )) I thought my parents will never accept my husband. This summer we visited my country for the first time in 3 years, I introduced him to my parents. I could not believe how much my parents love him ! Of Course it didn't happen overnight , they saw my success in life, they saw how happy I am with him.They realized he is the right person for me. It all takes time, I was away from my country , but always shared my life with my parents through video calls.
Now they want us to have kids lol.
I wish you to have a great time when you meet him! YOu will know it if you are doing the right thing. You will feel if he is the right person. These kind of issues will make you closer& stronger or will separate you, great test for relationships I would say ))) What's yours will always find you !
I know Matthew is a dating coach, but so much of his advice is applicable to literally all kinds of relationships
Basically, trust their actions, not their words.
In a LDR it realllllyyy does take two. If one person in the relationship has visa or financial issues and you have to be the one making all the effort to make the relationship work this can become a burden. Consider EARLY into the relationship important factors that you are willing to deal with and what your not willing to deal with. The longer you stay in the relationship the harder it is to leave. 2-3 years can really fly by. You don’t want to invest this time because your emotions will get into the way of you making smart decisions and it’s harder on the other person too. Now, if you have considered ALL factors and it does feel right, go for it! Sometimes our life partners are not on our side of the world. Just make sure your not the one making all the effort.
I love your comment! Thank you for your advice, it gave me clarity on my personal situation , I've got my answer now, thank you for your wisdom!
@@lidya3837 I’m so glad you found your answer! Having clarity is mental freedom. Peace to you 🙏
I’ve met the love of my life recently online. And I have all faith in us that this can work love doesn’t have a set distance. She make me feel high up in the sky. She makes me shy we talk all day and even night. She is the one and I’m sure regardless of the distance this can work. She’s with me all the time. She stole my heart and I am sure we going to make this work she will be my wife one day. Don’t give up on love guys no matter the distance❤️
I just ended a long-distance relationship after 2 years a couple of hours before you uploaded the video for the exact same reasons you explained, and now I am relieved that I did the right thing.
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is gone
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he helped me get my ex also can help you immediately he have solutions to all problems.
Text him on what'sapp
..+2.3.4.9.0.5.8.6.2.6.0.6.3..
You made a good decision. Waste of time. Don't sacrifice yourself especially financially
We got married last month after 1.5 years of LDR. YES, LDR WORK!
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is gone
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he helped me get my ex also can help you immediately he have solutions to all problems.
Text him on what'sapp
..+2.3.4.9.0.5.8.6.2.6.0.6.3..
LDR for 1.5 years isn’t that long so that makes sense why it would work, anything longer than that, probably not
Long distance relationship are best... If your partner is a cheater doesn't matter he's in distance or close he'll cheat ... If you can love someone without touching them give your everything even from distance, if every song and season and everything reminds you of him... Than think how much strong your relationship will be when you'll live together... I saw many successful relationships... It's all about trust, patience and true love... Waiting is hard but the results are sweet
It depends on the distance, but they usually don’t work because when you don’t see someone frequently enough you tend to put them on a pedestal more easily. I never had a long-distance relationship that worked. Of course there are always exceptions to the rule but the problem is that someone who lives in another area can hide their flaws more easily, and it is precisely these flaws that someone NEEDS to know they exist in order to decide whether a person is a suitable one for a relationship.
Exactly, the flaws!
Yes you are right people love live in dream
You make a valid point. I am married to my former LDR partner. We were 5000 miles apart. We are still together and happy but that said, we didn’t really get to understand each other until after living together for a while. No amount of Skype or meeting up for a weekend can take the place off that. I would suggest anyone thinking of being together after dating long distance do a six month trial of living together before making any permanent decisions. Maybe that’s less romantic but it’s the smartest and most rational way to approach it.
@@leanakincheloe
You know what....I am in a relationship with someone who lives 130 miles from me, and whenever I suggest meeting each other in some place, he says that he is too busy and needs to request a vacation for meeting me. He is not looking for meeting me like for 2 or 3 hours and that is it. He rather wants to rent somewhere close to me during his vacation so that we can see each other every day. Now, after reading your comment about how you managed your relationship with your husband - may God bless both of you- I feel I am stupid for waiting for him for one year ! I should probably bring this topic with him these days and put an end to it
@@user-pz9uw1d07 you’re def not stupid. It’s just tough. With jobs and everything especially if you live in the US where vacation time is minimal. At some point you just have to decide to do it or don’t. But I would always suggest doing a trial
Period and having a back up plan because you just never know. And that goes with anyone not just LDR. Love will find a way. I hope you work things out and find what’s best for you. Thank you for the nice words. We are still together and going strong. It’s very possible. 💛
The one great thing of 2020 is my discovery of Matthew Hussey! Thank you Matthew! You are a big part of what got me through this year 🙏💕
I’ve been listening to your advice for so long, and I finally found one who is stepping up to the actions I hold myself accountable for as well. I’m respecting myself first, and I’m being objective about this exciting feeling. I don’t know exactly how to put into words that this person is making the same moves as I would, and that’s what’s important. I don’t want some man to bend over backwards for me, but I know now that I want someone who will act as though I would also act. That’s what matters! Thank you for what you share!
I've been in a LDR for 2 years (16 hs flight away) and I've visited him twice so far, staying 2 months each of those times with him in his country. It's hard, REALLY hard, especially that first week after returning home and feeling extremely lonely. Getting used to having someone sleep next to you every night, have breakfast with them, make lunch together, and all of those beautiful things, and then going back to being alone in your own room, I can't put into words how painful that feeling is. Those first few weeks after returning to my home country are the worst time for us because we know we won't see each other again for MONTHS. I was able to visit him last year in December during the pandemic because I had to prove we were in a relationship and I was not going to his country for tourism purposes, I did a 14 day quarantine which was a lot harder than I thought it'd be, and it looks like this year it's going to be the same thing. He's my best friend and I love him so much. I can't wait to see him again. ❤️
Don't give up there is a great man i know he can help you text him via WhatsApp now
+ 2 3 4 0 8 1 6 2 0 7 8 3 0 6
How are u guys doing now?
Well
You
Merry
Me
👧👧😍😍😍💍💍💍❤❤❤❤🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷
Mine is 18hour flight and we are trying to blog it ruclips.net/video/RjD0xAavaig/видео.html .. I’m English she she is Filipina
I needed this video, just in time. I was talking to this guy and he was always telling me “I’m gonna see you soon, search the flights for you to come” but there was ni actions. He didn’t like to ft, no calls just texting and it was boring and NO EFFORT SEEN. I realized he wasn’t the guy I want it, he could be the most consistent guy when it came to text but no effort at all in any other way. Don’t settle. Don’t let guys treat you poorly. I was mad at myself by letting someone like him even texted me😅. But I dumped him and I feel amazing. Knowing that he didnt care when I did (so I wasn’t wrong) and putting myself first after 2 month of talking😂. SELF LOVE MY BABES.
Well I guess almost same here...but in my case...i was the one working..well i was a student 2nd yr of degree it was during covid when i met her, we both got close to eachother, fell for eachother she wanted to meet and we had some future plans together like marry travel and made lot promises "infact she used to say that i never leave her" , we used to be on calls, video calls for 24 hrs literally gave alot time to her we were there for eachother she did the same she helped me alot mentally and emotionally we literally talked abt everything, i also used to tell her that "there will be people and times that won't be in our favour and i want you to stay strong and trust me coz i won't leave you" tbh i really wanted to take care of her look after her uno... but yeah covid got over, i was in my final year i had to work hard clear my exams.. focus on to do something so that i can get to her and meet and work on our plans and dream...well didn't get enough quality time as i used to with her b4, tho i would update what im upto and ofcourse ask abt her health made calls during nights make her laugh feel loved and do as much as i can... yeah sometimes i would feel low too she never was trying to help or understand me, she was possesive or attention grabber in which i wasn't able to pay attention to her at those days , but yeah i had hope & it was her...and she got fed up said i dont give enough time to her i wasn't there much as i used , i don't make her feel loved, she cutted herself (ik she was lying) says i used her 😂🤚🏻(like frl & how), she wants to breakup, even tho i explained her and she knows what i was going through like it was strange to see her change all of a sudden , she asked for space alot of things ik of her were just changed but anyways i tried not to contact her but failed kept messaging her calling her begged her to come back i was worried abt her, she said we broke up (from her side and i didn't even agree and i told her)...but yeah i found out she was talking to some other dude, just coz he spent more time with her and i was working hard for her for us...and shattered the hell out of me, no trust , no loyalty, disbelief heartbroken crying, all the promises.. she started say "our relationship was shit", "he is a better man than you" and even tho i satisfy her, i started to Shake lot of grief and i am still going through it ..and as soon as we officially broke up the hour she went to this new dude... we were together for almost 3 years....we were in LDR was going to meet her this month Dec 2022 but 2 days b4 booking the flight this happend... and yeah she in LDR too with her new partner....it was love not a casual realtionship she knew it but she still went to him...im really low and help?
I soo needed to hear this!! So grateful to Lewis Howes for letting me find you and your contents !💪 at first I was skeptical about dating coach stuff, but your empathy and awareness on relationship patterns and personal growth really motivated me to keep watching and I must say your work can give people tools to navigate better through relationships and gave me clarity! Thank you
The amazing content aside I LOVE How many comments are finding refuge in a video like this, that’s a sign you are on the right path. Well done in creating an open dialogue to a complex or emotionally infused issue.
This video is EXCELLENT and just explained the recent end of my LDR in such a simple way. He had all these great explanations for not being able to risk or do the same for me that I would have been willing to. I was making sacrifices again and again just to keep the relationship going because it wouldn't have even existed if I didn't. He showed up for me in the beginning but when the pandemic hit he wasn't committed anymore. We waited until we finally had a CHANCE to meet again and then he didn't come to see me, which brought out the real, simple truth: he wasn't in it as much as I was. All the great words and talking do nothing in the end if they're not met with action. Thank you thank you thank you for making this such a logical approach!!!! This gives me a little more closure as to what the heck even happened.
Matthew Hussey..u r beyond compare..
Ur emotional intelligence is beyond compare..
I respect u d most..
I’m in a long distance relationship and it’ll work if your both willing to make it work and it does get hard but if it’s really meant to be then it just comes back together. Seeing my partner after 1-2months is the best feeling ever. Reminds us both that we get along really well.
The “space” you create in your life for the relationship is an important concept I learnt from this video
What I was actually looking for was the one you mentioned for "another video." It hit so bad, I got my answer. That was magical and accepting that is pathetic for me and unfair for the other person. Thank you.
Definitely needed this today. I've been deciding on giving up on a long distance thing for months now and on new year's eve I was dealing with a scary situation where I just needed someone to talk to and he didn't have time. I've even told him months ago or conversations had no substance so he talk even less now if that was even possible. I'm jyst beyond ready to quit even trying to find someone.
Thank you Matt for this video and I totally agree, it is bloody hard but if the process feels good in the sense that the person makes you feel good I'd say do it. Remember we girls have been with neighbors that just wanted to use us.
I just reconnected with this guy I met 10 years ago and we have been talking every time we get a chance. I'm in grad school and he is a nurse, we are on opposite sides of the US and we both work 12 hour days. For me, there was no way to give time to a person but this feels so right. It has been a few months but we are making plans to see each other in a couple of months. I feel more valued than with any other relationship that was with someone close by. We were already intimate 10 years ago, so I feel like there's something there too, we'll see, fingers crossed 🤞
Thank you for every word in this video. I cried all along. Everything you say is true. I wish I knew it earlier.
I feel like I was blown up on exactly this mine. My grand gestures weren't reciprocated and I listened to flowery words instead. Thank you for this video, I noted you questions. They are hard-boiled thruth.
I hope your heart is healing and that you are happier.
Thank you for consistently supplying proof that adorable, smart men exist. Wink. 🙏🏼❤️
Hi, I'm Rogers, you don't mind me sending you a direct message, I'd love to talk to you
Leave Harry alone, Matthew!!! He's trying his best!
I feel this. Been in a ldr since sept. We live 8 hrs away but covid has made it tricky to meet up. His province is code red and shut down. My prov is on the way to that too. He has been trying to come see me since nov but want to be smart and not put each other at risk. We both want the same things and are open books, literally talk about everything.. Text daily and FaceTime multiple times a week. Recently started doing virtual movie nights too which i love. I really think this could go the distance and end with marriage. We both said we are dating with the intent of marriage. He has a son so it would be me who has to move. But I’m excited at the thought of moving to his town and being together. I’ve never felt this safe and secure in a relationship before. 🥰
I feel like I’ve been watching these videos for so long now that I’m not really learning anything new, but Matt’s just entertaining to watch. And also I feel like most of the videos’ subtext is like “dump him” 😂
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is gone
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he helped me get my ex also can help you immediately he have solutions to all problems.
Text him on what'sapp
..+.2.3.4.9.0.5.8.6.2.6.0.6.3..
This honestly so true. I broke up with my long distance partner a few days ago for emotional abuse. But I definitely see what you mean about one person willing to do and sacrifice more than the other. I was willing to move to another country, learn about and embrace his culture, learn a new language, change and censor parts of me that I knew weren't harmful but it would've been offensive to them. I was willing to do all of that because I loved him and could see a future with him. But he wouldn't even consider visiting me even though he was much better equipped to do so than I was. He just didn't want to. His thought process was that if I really do want him, that I'll do it. Otherwise, bye bye. Then when I left him for bsing emotionally abusive, he acted like I hadn't done a single thing for him and that the sacrifices I was willing to make weren't even a factor. Leaving him was hard but I'm glad it's over now. I've already met a couple lovely guys I'm talking to as friends for now until I've recovered enough to date again and I can tell I'd be so much better off with them than him.
Aww I hope you're all okay now. There would be that someone who's right for you and would reciprocate in your relationship ❤️ take care!
@@ashleyclaireabella7026 Thank you Ashley! I've been with one of the guys I mentioned in my comment for a couple months now and how he treats me is like night and day compared with my ex. He's a sweetheart and makes an effort for me. Funnily enough he was a very good friend of mine while with my ex so I guess it all works out how it's supposed to.
@@myjennaration4945 true. 1
@@myjennaration4945 Daamn so basically you had a backup plan all this time? And now you moved on with that "friend" that you knew and talked to while being in relationship with a guy who "abused you"? Interesting cover-up
@@poison2259 so I’m not allowed to have male friends while in a relationship? I didn’t get into a relationship for over 3 months following the breakup. To put it bluntly, I left my ex bcs he was a c**t and would make me feel tiny and believe I was the absolute worst person. He’d even say awful things about a member of my family bcs she was ‘taking away time I could’ve spent with him’. I spent literally hours on the phone with him every single day but apparently it wasn’t enough. That’s just one example of him being a c**t. So no. It wasn’t a cover up. Leaving him was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done but it had to be done and I don’t regret doing so one bit.
Make THAT DIFFERENT VIDEO, Matt!!! The one about existential melancholy, please!!!!!!
Love from Serbia ❤️🥰❤️
I like the use of the word " tax" it just made me see relationships in whole different and positive way.
Currently I am in a long distance relationship. The advise I'd give to thise in one, is communication is 100% key. We take the time daily to Voice Chat and hang out together online, because the distance can be tough.
Also we sat down and spoke about our future, and we were both sure about each other.
The hardest part is our time zone diff (6 hrs during DST). He wakes up when I'm going to bed. So we text or talk a bit. During the daytime during his lockdown with his mother we don't talk as much. S. Africa has load shedding (power cut offs). Also now rioting and chaos. He's upset and difficult at this time. It will get better as it was before Covid. I'm sure if we can survive this we can make it through anything.
Has been on going with our on and off LDR for the last 5 years now... Married for 1 year.. we definitely has our ups and downs during those times but not much different than when we're together... Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with us. One thing for sure, we always try to enjoy the moment each coming day ❤️
Are y'all still together?
The hardest ever. 😭😭😭
Rough. But oh..so worth it if doing it with your person.
I am in my second long distance relatioship, from my experience... all the concepts matthew teaches, apply to long distance relationship as well, whether we talk about the effort for effort or the builder mindset... EVERYTHING is on point
The mistakes which happened the first time, i rectified them the second time...marrying him next year 🥰
Congratulations to you both. 👏🎊
Thank you so much... ❤❤❤
@@ferishtas
1. I used sell myself short and never raised my voice on the things which didn't feel right to me (it was my way of keeping him with me)
Now I always make sure that I honestly and humbly convey how I exactly feel about everything
2. I used to trust words more than actions, i was told again and again "I will make it upto you" everytime there was a need to delivering on the promises but that time to make up for things never came and I habituated that person of treating me that way
Now I look for actions more than words
3. I realised that it can't be only me in the relationship, in the last relationship the person didn't want a relationship after some time (I was given hints nothing direct though) but I kept trying to make it work
Now I work on the relationship but I also command the same effort in a loving manner
4. (This is the biggest one) I realised that I have to let universe do its thing and give space for the other person to chose for his life... he realised after we started our relationship that he wanted different things for his life... he told me after 2.5 years of me trying to work it out but once he was honest with me , I let him go.
The moment I got the clarity of what I want and do not want in a relationship, I got my man and he is EXACTLY what I thought of , even his qualities and virtues can be arranged In the order as I had in my priority list.
Have an honest conversation without the fear of loss (trust universe, we never lose anything in life which is meant for us)
Good luck for your Relationship ❤
@@ferishtas at times while thinking only about ourselves we forget the entire world...
It's indeed true that because of the pandemic travel is super tough at the moment. September is not very far away (even if it is not meant for you, you will get to know soon)
My way of getting effort is exactly what Matthew discussed in one of his interviews with esther perel... she said when you want your partner to do something for you, rather than saying "you NEVER do xyz" ... say "I love it when you do xyz" or I would love to feel close to you everysingle day (in your case)
Or as matthew says attach the word "hot" "I find you so hot when you do xyz" ...
Worked with me EVERY SINGLE TIME...
And also, a little trust on him and in a way what he says is right...
I feel you also should wait to get sure yourself before getting families involved... what if he involves family and after that YOU get put off by him ... don't get stuck girl... You are the prize to earned... don't give yourself away at someone's mercy
@@ferishtas girl how would you like if someone rushes you into something (which you might even like but the feasibility doesn't allow at that particular time)...
Chill out for the time being and life is short yes but it can be REALLLLYYYYYY long if you get stuck with a wrong person...
Let the time unfold and meanwhile keep working on yourself , your hobbies, workout, eat well, read...I am sure there might be certain similar things which made him attracted to you at the first place and made you feel good about yourself
i am going to college and we’re doing long distance and honestly it has made our relationship even better and i feel like we’re even more in love than before bc we appreciate each other more
How did it go?
@@user-vf4xm3ss7g we made ittttt :)
@@nikkinixon8417 I'm happy to hear that :D
ruclips.net/video/RjD0xAavaig/видео.html me and my girlfriend are like 18 hours away .. I’m
English, she’s Filipa.. it’s been 2 years now
Im going back to college and I started to see an old friend from high school in a romantic way. We are only 3 hours away but are both 20. It’s scary to see where it goes but we are following what feels right in the moment.
Thats painfully accurate, i was the one not willing to do all of that and it gives me clarity, any kind of sacrifice my bf asked of me i found it impossible to do while he was rearranging his life to be with me . It was very painful to let go of that relationship and i miss him but i know it would have never worked out , for sure . So thIs video is the closure i needed , thank you ♥️
This is just the video I have been needing. Thanks Matthew x
I’ve been in LDR for nearly 3 years now. We promised to get married but I felt that it will not work out for me and I also felt that his not honest with me so I ended it a month ago. Surprisingly I found out this month that the girl that his been cheating on me with is now pregnant. I was glad that I let him go first but the fact that I still like him it hurts. I question myself for sometimes if I made the right decision but I just have that faith that everything happens for a reason. One important lesson I got out of it is that the choices that we made in the past and the present can change our destiny. He chose to cheat on me and without me knowing it I let him go and later I found out about it. So for me personally I will say that after this relationship I just don’t trust LDR anymore.
If really love your wife you can find way,just don't treat her bad,show her love,care,and respect, keep her happy, if you feel blessed to be with her trust me you don't have to do anything forceful, everything will come so naturally, God bless you all
I was in a long distance relationship for almost five years. It ended when he told me he wasn't sure how he felt about me. Apparently, he didn't feel enough for me. If you don't know how you feel about someone after so much time invested (either cyber or otherwise), there is no point in continuing. Chances are even if there wasn't distance involved, he would've come to the same conclusion. Love stories should never be one-sided. Cut it off if the person isn't emotionally capable.
Love how honest and straight to point you are.
Hahah love when Harry is making fun of you Matthew in the videos!😄😄😄
Yes long distance relationships are hard work, but I think that’s what makes them interesting and exciting! And long distance relationships are great filter for real connections! ✨💛
❤❤😍😍🌷
I think it's important to remember that this was one example he gave, getting on a plane and meeting you. Of course this isn't possible for all long distance couples. I'm in an LDR and we're both still students, so neither of us have the money to just get on a plane. Hence why it's an LDR. But☝ we make time for each other. We text, we call, we still have dates where we watch stuff or play games. We do everything we can to make the distance feel a bit less. There is equal effort from both sides. And we communicate properly, about everything. We know what we have, we know what we want in the future together and we're working towards that together. Matthew just means that you have to be sure the other person and you are on the same page. Cause believe it or not, an LDR and a regular relationship aren't that different- they both take work to make work.
Hi there ! I hope everything is going great with both of you ! I'm also in a long distance relationship it's been 2 weeks ago, we talk every day and stuff.. but sometimes i have doubts and I'm like is it just me overthinking and analysing things or he really mean what he says and should trust him ? I want to know when being flirty can be a red flag ??
“Hesitation was RUDE.” 😐 lol
My ex broke up with me a month ago after 3.5 years of long distance. I got way to comfortable in her love for me that I got lazy in the relationship. She never communicated that her emotional needs weren't being met and I would've sacrificed for her if she had spoke up, but I should've done it regardless. I feel like if my ex saw this video she would think I wasn't committed to her like I should've been, and truth be told I wasn't. But I still saw myself marrying her one day. I just wish I had another chance to make things right. It was my first ever relationship and I didn't know the damage I was causing. I really did love this girl more than anything on the planet and I hate myself for letting her skip between my fingers because I was too selfish and blind to see how I was being a bad boyfriend. I don't know how I can forgive myself. Everything was perfect in real life when we would see each other, I was just really bad at making long distance work. I would never make the same mistakes again I just wish I could've learned for the better of that relationship and not a future one. I can't forgive myself. Im so sorry sweet baby. You always deserved better.
Maybe u should tell her all this stuff if she still loves you I’m pretty sure she would give u a second chance life is too short to be wishing stop regretting and make a move boy hope it works out
I feel like im her. It takes two to make effort. She’s probably doesn’t feel that you see or plan future with her or sure 100% so that why she decided to leave. If you’re still love her now. Maybe it’s time to revisit this conversation?
My partner and I both have experience with long distance relationships. We miss eachother like crazy, but it makes the meet ups 10X more incredible.
+2347030894892.
FINALLY A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP VIDEO!! Love you Mathew ♥️
So I can recommend you to someone who can help you out with your condition
Loving these short snippet videos at the moment, thanks Matt! (Also all the philosophy students will love you using Occam’s razor aha)
Man, you are so helpful. Thank you for your wisdom
Why does this makes me teary? 💔
I’m in LDR but really scared. We’ve been together for almost 7months and we only saw each other a week ago. The fact that we have seen each other makes me scared of loosing him 🥺 he’s so caring and loving
Wow..at the last part of this video when the music started with you Matt!!! ❤️ Love it
Great advice! I’m in a newly LD relationship and first instinct was to see what MH’s advice was. LOVE THE INFO.
Matthew, these are smart questions to ask. So many people are all talk and no action. If he's not calling me regularly, setting up video dates and progressing the relationship, he's full of crap. I don't invest more than he does.
I can recommend you to someone who can help you out with your condition, he has solutions to all problems
Whatspp me now
+141=5787=8910
Communication, respect, honesty, trust
Respect over all
Love this! Very much to the point!
We’re both university students and I met him around 2021 and it’s difficult for us to see each other, especially that i live in a third world country. We communicate, give time, set boundaries to make it work. We used to joke about visiting each other but then it started becoming serious so now we both plan to see each other someday 😆 He is willing to visit me first and really wants to. Right now he prioritizes by being secured with everything. All I can say is to trust each other, communicate, and give time. My friends tell me that he’s the “if he wanted to he will” or he’s not “all talk” type of guy, I appreciate the things he’s doing and he also appreciates me for what I do 🖤
I was in long distance relationship. I thought the person was as determined as I was, I thought he loved me so that he would take as many measures to be with me as he was saying, and in the beginning proving. Then out of blue he gave up for reasons I find ridiculous because if you love someone, those are not reasons at all. Unfortunately, it is having its toll on me, and I am suffering for 3 months already after he broke up with me
Omg me too I was loyal and everything and was willing to do anything I have no idea why my “bf” didn’t want to try anymore
@@katarashippuden9467 guess because they faked everything. Idk. But if a person genuinely loves the other, they will try to save the relationship any way possible if the other hasn't done anything too horrible
Hi
❤❤😍😍🌷🌷
Well I guess almost same here...but in my case...i was the one working..well i was a student 2nd yr of degree it was during covid when i met her, we both got close to eachother, fell for eachother she wanted to meet and we had some future plans together like marry travel and made lot promises "infact she used to say that i never leave her" , we used to be on call for 24 hrs literally gave alot time to her we were there for eachother she did the same too she helped me alot mentally and emotionally we literally talked abt everything, i also used to tell her that "there will be people and times that won't be in our favour and i want you to stay strong and trust me coz i won't leave you" tbh i really wanted to take care of her look after her uno... but yeah covid got over, i was in my final year i had to work hard clear my exams.. focus on to do something so that i can get to her and meet and work on our plans and dream...well didn't get enough quality time as i used to with her b4, tho i would update what im upto and ofcourse ask abt her health made calls during nights make her laugh feel loved and do as much as i can... yeah sometimes i would feel low too she never was trying to help or understand me, she was possesive or attention grabber in which i wasn't able to pay attention to her at those days , but yeah i had hope & it was her...and she got fed up said i dont give enough time to her i wasn't there much as i used , i don't make her feel loved, she cutted herself (ik she was lying) says i used her 😂🤚🏻(like frl & how), she wants to breakup, even tho i explained her and she knows what i was going through like it was strange to see her change all of a sudden , she asked for space alot of things ik of her were just changed but anyways i tried not to contact her but failed kept messaging her calling her begged her to come back i was worried abt her, she said we broke up (from her side and i didn't even agree and i told her)...but yeah i found out she was talking to some other dude, just coz he spent more time with her and i was working hard for her for us...and shattered the hell out of me, no trust , no loyalty, disbelief heartbroken crying, all the promises.. she started say "our relationship was shit", "he is a better man than you" and even tho i satisfy her, i started to Shake lot of grief and i am still going through it ..and as soon as we officially broke up the hour she went to this new dude... we were together for almost 3 years....we were in LDR was going to meet her this month Dec 2022 but 2 days b4 booking the flight this happend... and yeah she in LDR too with his new partner....im really down and help?
This changed my mind. Thanks Mathew
The timing is perfect
Thank you ❤️
EXACTLY!!! The first things you said are completely true!
I am currently in LDR for a year. My so called bf had always given all kind of excuses to not invest in meeting me...time and financially..and recently he lost a close family member and has more of excuses to not put any efforts for anything... while I had been there like a true partner for him always in his bad time, before and from the start..he's taking me like granted all of a sudden..this hurts..but I guess its time to call QUITS..🥺
Deadlines are SO important. I was in a ldr with someone who kept making choices that kept them away. What should’ve been 2 years turned into 4 and ended with a breakup and cheating 💀
I am too.. and despite the fact that i am willing to make it work and sacrifice my time just to see him, still he don't want to meet halfway.. considering we're just less than 2hrs away from each other by plane.. this video has made me accept that he's not willing to do the same for me no matter how many times he say he want to be with me or he thinks about me all the time.
This completely crushed my dreams. Was going to ask the man of my dreams if we could try for a LDR, and I don't even know if he would be willing to do this.
Wow! So true, most long distance relationships are a waste of time
my parents was in long distance relationship for 8 years, i was in long distance relationship for 4 years. now ldr is definitely easier than say, 40 years ago. i'd say im lucky because we're both entrepreneur: therefore we BOTH have flexible working hour. we did nerdy tricks like: checking how many hours exactly normal couple (non-ldr) stay together in a year, then we just spend minimum mimic that hour. i know a handful of other couple doing ldr and none of them broke up. but yeah, u have to see light in the end of the tunnel, somebody has to be willing to sacrifice.
I learned this the hard way. My ex for 6 months said he couldn't meet me again (after meeting only once) because he was too afraid to go out and catch the virus. This was mid-2021. As much as I understood where he's coming from, the lack of action or any sort of plan to make it happen just didn't work for me. I found myself again in an LDR situation but this time with someone who would cross the world, even if he doesn't have to, just to see me. Any relationships, long distance or not, will work if both people will try to make it work.
Wow when the music started playing. That's when you really started talking to me
I’m in one right now...it’s the hardest relationship to be in but 1yr, 8months and counting... I guess we doing it right💕
Same for me! We've also been together for 1yr and 8 months, haha :D
Congratulations to the both of you. 2 months and two days now.
2yrs and three months in my online relationship, counting down when we meet again in January unsure when in January. Guess were doing it right? Comparing my relationship with others who has similar issues.
Wow, just counted 1 yr 8 mos here too!
And how long do y’all plan on keeping it that way ?
I'm also in LDR. Almost a year. Hopefully we can make it work to stay loyal and loving each other. We do call/video call and share a lot about our daily activity. There are ups and downs.
Don't give up there is a great man i know he can help you text him via WhatsApp now
+ 2 3 4 0 8 1 6 2 0 7 8 3 0 6
How was it?
Trying to maintain a long distance relationship is hard. You miss them desperately, if it’s the real thing.
We realised very quickly, that we had to be together to make a go of things.
We were both prepared to move halfway across the world to be together.
He’s home in September, because we need to be together.
I couldn’t be happier.
I could watch your antics all day. Too funny 😂
I've needed to hear this for the last few years. I've watched 462829 videos. Read 463728 books. And this damn video nailed it. Its the simplicity I needed.
hello dear, do you need any help about your love life and G e t t i n g back exes.. DR STEVE can help you out. it worked for 😘 me.. whtsaap H i m with those numbers you are seeing...and you both can chat better.💢💢💓💓
+2 3 4 7 0 3 0 8 9 4 8 9 2.
I'm give up 4 years LDR and never meet in person. Misery, 13 hours difference we are spend by phone calls or videos. Breakup last year during give him some more space (2 weeks, a month, 3 months, 6 months, and a year). I just feel upside down when he asked to let him Go. A year I begged to ask him to back in a relationship like before. But quarrel, blaming each other, worsens the relationship. I was hurt emotionally and maybe he was too.And we stopped contacting each other. After new year, he contacted me again, and a few months ago he was trying to get me back, and he promised to come to visit me end of this year. But I can't to take him back. I hurt.
I really need this rn because my partner and I have been together for about 3 months starting off with long distance, we've had plans of visits and meets figured out but now he'll be moving farther away for school and I'm 100% supportive of him and what he wants to do with his life but now he has all these insecurities that things won't work out and I want to try so hard to make things work.
This resonates... i like someone from the other side of the world and we cant meet due to covid and travel restrictions. But we cant wait to meet in person
The simplest explanation: They're just not that into you.
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is not gone.
i know a great powerful man that can help you bring back your ex or crush forever without any stress and delay, he help me get my ex back few days ago, also can help you immediately, he have solution to all Problem.
Text him On What's app
+.1.(5.3.0).9.4.8.8.1.2.0
Was in a long distance relationship (thanks covid) which has just ended..initially heart broken but watching this guy has made me slap myself and realise my self worth. She made no effort for months and that should have woken me up - she had checked out mentally a long time ago.
Mine too
Excited for that second video!
His videos are always right on time wow!!
4:54 such a good slap in the face! so accurate I had to laugh 😂
We've been in LDR for almost 4 years now without meeting each other yet. 🥺 But I hope and wish , we'll be together soon.
4 years without meeting you guys are really strong.
Still not meet yet, really? Wowwww
Same 1 year for me and I already feel tired of asking him about our future
Did you guys meet?
Omg I thought I was the only one going through these things. Thank you for your videos. I feel like I can never find the right guy they look at me like a sex object and I’m sick of it
Excellent video! Where was this video 6 months ago? I was in a LDR with someone I truly cared about. He was continuously making strides and plans for our relationship and I was hesitant because ultimately I was scared. He was 4 states away and I was scared about moving so far away from family and friends. I was scared if I moved… what if it didn’t work out. We had our ups and downs but he was 110% in and I was scared. All of the steps you listed here, I was not fully demonstrating and it eventually turned him off. After a year of tests and trails and hesitation on my end, he called it quits and now I’m trying to fight for him. But I think it’s too late 💔😮💨