This is a really sensitive topic and many of us are scared to even bring it up out of the fear that its going to come across as one being judgemental. I am 32 and making peace with the idea that I might end up without kids because I am conscious of the environment I will bring the child into. This is also making sure that I and the person I have kids with are okay financially, emotionally, mentally and can support each other in those aspects. Also as a first born it also comes from that I had to come in where my mom could not and it at times meant I could not be kid. Part of the reason I never wanted to have kids at first and now give myself the opportunity to play when it comes up.
Thank you for the conversation team. I do think a lot was overlooked, I wish we had spoken about the need for solid community when raising kids so that we interrogate the idea of needing to raise kids in 2 parent homes instead of everyone around who loves the kid being immensely helpful and involved. Efforts can then be focused on how we cultivate these communities individually and societally. And what about the two parent homes where (most often) the mother is a single parent because the father is not emotionally equipped to be supportive and present in more than physicality? If the goal is to have happy and healthy kids then I do feel like there are better ways to achieve that than 2 parent homes.
statistically speaking there isn't a better way to achieve happy healthy kids. Two-parent families with both biological mom and dad produce the best results across the board. There is a book called the Two-Parent Privilege that goes into this in depth.
I enjoyed this conversation so much, I am a single parent cause my partner died and I often wish the other partner was around. I am fortunate however to have overwhelming support, and I thank God for that, but this conversation is so insightful.
If both parents are mature and willing parents co parenting cam work. But if the other parent is unwilling to parent and are often alcoholic then why keep them around to traumatize the child? Besides that there is a community to support the mother because most gents don't step up as much as is needed by their pregnant partner, even in a stable relationship/marriage. I think this conversation needs to evolve
I am so glad I I gave this channel a chance, can't leave without it.... snubbed it cos of the low views,but after watching Zimasa's episode, coming from his interview on podcast and chill,I was HOOKED!!!
Sho! This here conversion broke my heart and enlightened me at the same time. I am so so glad to have put my pride aside for my son's sake, and have a somewhat healthy co-parenting situation going on with his dad.❤
I think I needed this episode more than anything, I’m currently not on speaking terms with the father of my kid because he cursed me out for mentioning “my partner” in a conversation. Yoh he called me every name under the sun. We doing so well but now I feel like we will never have a healthy co-parenting relationship because he even threatened to take my son…
tjooo guys this was so powerful to be cut this short, atleast another hour would do because i believe the root cause of most of our problems as a country are the result disfunctional family structures
1st time watching your show, loved the snippet posts on tiktok that's how I knew about you. What an self introspection episode, there was still so much to listen to from the guest the 40mins is absolutely not enough ladies. Thank you for the topic
Thank you for this. This one specifically has probably given me an opportunity to delve deeper into how I go about conflict resolution even within friendships that I believed were healthy.
Hey TCC, as always, great topic🤌🏾and I enjoyed Danny's perspectives. I did however feel that a rather important aspect is being ignored which is African customs and traditions affecting parenting. For example, we have adopted the nuclear family structure but as Africans we are "village" people. That being said, I would love it if you would get someone to talk about our roles in "extended" families. There's a lady known as Coach Nunu who is a family coach and she explained it so beautifully on another podcast I follow. *suggestion*
this converstaion is very deep, im going through a situation where the mother of my kids has checked out from being involved in the kids lives, she seems to not be able to separate the failure of our marriage and the kids still needing both parents, its as if for Her if She is not with Me then She will not be there for the kids and this is sad because I try so much to make up excuses for Her to my children because they starting to ask wether their Mom cares about them or not..this is stressing Me out
Most cultures dictate that, even in marriage, the child is the mother's. This, of course, is to put the responsibilities on the mother and free the father. Now, when there is a breakdown in the relationship, it only goes that the mother keeps the same energy BUT suddenly everyone else forgets that they gave the mother the "ownership".
The biggest mistake we make as parents is to assume that kids will understand,guys it hurts to watch your parents separate .if you can,please try sort things out with your partner and make things work Remember separation benefits you as parents than it does to the kids
In a perfect world with perfect people but the country we live in and people in it aren't like that. I sometimes do feel like TCC is not intouch with the reality of things. Is just how i feel though because majority of the time you will find that the father is not physically present and even if they are you find the mother doing everything by themselves especially in black communities. I know most people would say men are not taught this or that but men are grown people. Why is it that women can grow to be responsible for their kids but men need to be taught?. I haven’t so far met a woman who intentionally wanted to raise their kids alone. Just the father not stepping up or just left totally.
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
This is a really sensitive topic and many of us are scared to even bring it up out of the fear that its going to come across as one being judgemental. I am 32 and making peace with the idea that I might end up without kids because I am conscious of the environment I will bring the child into. This is also making sure that I and the person I have kids with are okay financially, emotionally, mentally and can support each other in those aspects. Also as a first born it also comes from that I had to come in where my mom could not and it at times meant I could not be kid. Part of the reason I never wanted to have kids at first and now give myself the opportunity to play when it comes up.
100%with you.
Thank you for the conversation team.
I do think a lot was overlooked, I wish we had spoken about the need for solid community when raising kids so that we interrogate the idea of needing to raise kids in 2 parent homes instead of everyone around who loves the kid being immensely helpful and involved. Efforts can then be focused on how we cultivate these communities individually and societally.
And what about the two parent homes where (most often) the mother is a single parent because the father is not emotionally equipped to be supportive and present in more than physicality?
If the goal is to have happy and healthy kids then I do feel like there are better ways to achieve that than 2 parent homes.
statistically speaking there isn't a better way to achieve happy healthy kids. Two-parent families with both biological mom and dad produce the best results across the board. There is a book called the Two-Parent Privilege that goes into this in depth.
This is the first time checking this channel out. I loved the conversation. ❤❤
I came here after your interview with Panuel.
I enjoyed this conversation so much, I am a single parent cause my partner died and I often wish the other partner was around. I am fortunate however to have overwhelming support, and I thank God for that, but this conversation is so insightful.
Hi, we’d love to talk to you, please email us at theconversationcapital@gmail.com
If both parents are mature and willing parents co parenting cam work. But if the other parent is unwilling to parent and are often alcoholic then why keep them around to traumatize the child? Besides that there is a community to support the mother because most gents don't step up as much as is needed by their pregnant partner, even in a stable relationship/marriage. I think this conversation needs to evolve
As a society the concept of taking responsibility for our lives and that of our children needs to evolve beyond financial needs...for both parents
I am so glad I I gave this channel a chance, can't leave without it.... snubbed it cos of the low views,but after watching Zimasa's episode, coming from his interview on podcast and chill,I was HOOKED!!!
Sho! This here conversion broke my heart and enlightened me at the same time. I am so so glad to have put my pride aside for my son's sake, and have a somewhat healthy co-parenting situation going on with his dad.❤
Been indulging in your great conversation. I'm loving every minute.
I think I needed this episode more than anything, I’m currently not on speaking terms with the father of my kid because he cursed me out for mentioning “my partner” in a conversation. Yoh he called me every name under the sun. We doing so well but now I feel like we will never have a healthy co-parenting relationship because he even threatened to take my son…
tjooo guys this was so powerful to be cut this short, atleast another hour would do because i believe the root cause of most of our problems as a country are the result disfunctional family structures
1st time watching your show, loved the snippet posts on tiktok that's how I knew about you.
What an self introspection episode, there was still so much to listen to from the guest the 40mins is absolutely not enough ladies.
Thank you for the topic
Mmmm. ❤What a beautiful, meaningful conversation. Soooo needed. Undoing generational trauma one conversation at a time. 🙌🏾Thank you.
I watch this episode for primarily Ursula's face but I must commend the team for their great work.Great insights.
Thank you for this. This one specifically has probably given me an opportunity to delve deeper into how I go about conflict resolution even within friendships that I believed were healthy.
Hey TCC, as always, great topic🤌🏾and I enjoyed Danny's perspectives. I did however feel that a rather important aspect is being ignored which is African customs and traditions affecting parenting. For example, we have adopted the nuclear family structure but as Africans we are "village" people. That being said, I would love it if you would get someone to talk about our roles in "extended" families. There's a lady known as Coach Nunu who is a family coach and she explained it so beautifully on another podcast I follow. *suggestion*
This conversation ❤️
Enjoyed listening...it went by so quickly
Grew up in a broken family that I dont even have the desire to have a family of my own. If its a curse then im ending it with me.
i feel that way too.
we keep on keeping on@@KamurukoVillage
Or you can choose to do better for yourself. What's more beautiful than the love of family.
Hi Ursula, i hope you guys are well, Please check the sound on your MICs, sometimes i have to put my volume high to be able to hear the conversations.
Jo! This conversation, I wish everyone could listen and learn ❤
This is a great conversation worth much. I love it
this converstaion is very deep, im going through a situation where the mother of my kids has checked out from being involved in the kids lives, she seems to not be able to separate the failure of our marriage and the kids still needing both parents, its as if for Her if She is not with Me then She will not be there for the kids and this is sad because I try so much to make up excuses for Her to my children because they starting to ask wether their Mom cares about them or not..this is stressing Me out
Saving to watch later.
We hope you enjoy it and come back for more of our episodes
The zoom ins on Ursula always eat!
I need a way of contacting this smart guy, he might make sense to my relationship
Hi, Dany Vambili here. At your service lol
Kiri 1 ure 7😂😭😭😭😂😭
You did not think beyond yourself
Most cultures dictate that, even in marriage, the child is the mother's. This, of course, is to put the responsibilities on the mother and free the father. Now, when there is a breakdown in the relationship, it only goes that the mother keeps the same energy BUT suddenly everyone else forgets that they gave the mother the "ownership".
40 mins so much was covered
The biggest mistake we make as parents is to assume that kids will understand,guys it hurts to watch your parents separate .if you can,please try sort things out with your partner and make things work
Remember separation benefits you as parents than it does to the kids
In a perfect world with perfect people but the country we live in and people in it aren't like that. I sometimes do feel like TCC is not intouch with the reality of things. Is just how i feel though because majority of the time you will find that the father is not physically present and even if they are you find the mother doing everything by themselves especially in black communities.
I know most people would say men are not taught this or that but men are grown people. Why is it that women can grow to be responsible for their kids but men need to be taught?. I haven’t so far met a woman who intentionally wanted to raise their kids alone. Just the father not stepping up or just left totally.
😂😂 as a bastard , l am laughing at the caption.
❤📌
📍 🤟🏿
This is a bomb 💣 💥 Episode guys very insightful ❤🙌🏾🙏🏽🤌🏽🔥