Thirty days after I left my narcissist, he married the bar skank he swore he was not having anything to do with, MARRIED! Who does that? I left him because I could not endure anymore abuse. He begged me to stay swore he wasn't seeing other women, but yet he was. I know I made the right decision but it still is a horrific experience.
T Martin something similar happened to me!!!! he married the woman he betrayed me for...he tried to keep me around while he was pursuing her!? he lied, decieved, tricked her, me & everyone...he takes no responsibility in marrying her...he states that his parents forced him...they pressed him to marry her because she is a doctor---good image & $$$$...I'm an RN...so basically he screwed me over for a better deal...he's stated that he doesn't care or love her at all?!? although I've had sensitive feelings towards her, I feel sorry for her...she bought all the bs he fed her...marriage & bought 500k house...of course the $$ that he contributed wasn't his...it was his parents
T Martin my ex husband I was married to for seven years together 11 years after our divorce two months later moved another woman into the house we had built together and then married her three months after moving her in. I understand this shock. I'm trying to move forward too just happened recently.
I have no words, I know how horrible you feel. It is an experience only a survivor knows. I think I am more upset over my stupidity than anything else. But truly you don't expect other human beings to be so horrible. Best of luck to you. You are free, now it's just healing the wounds.
My EMDR trauma therapist told me to EXPECT the Nex to be with another woman! She said it’s the nature of this personality type to need someone in his/her life. So, as I’ve healed more and more with therapy and no contact, I have placed another woman in the Nex’s vehicle (in my mind). Because of my experience with him, I have great empathy for any woman who is in relationship with him. I’m not saying that I might not feel a momentary twitch of angst, should I actually see him with another woman. I will have to give myself a “reality check” and say to myself that she isn’t better than I, that he isn’t happier. It is all “smoke and mirrors” with him. FAKE is what it is, because HE’s fake! Loving my freedom from tyranny! Blessings!❤️
I really needed this. My narc decided he wants to divorce me while I'm 7 months pregnant. I found out there's someone else, she's now pregnant and they are acting like the "perfect" couple.
i don’t feel bad for my ex’s new supply. there are things that i know about her that he doesn’t know. seems like they found their match. karma coming soon.
I just wanted to say, that his new supply didn't have compassion for me and our kids, she knew about me and our kids, so no, I don't have compassion for that jezebel harlot.
If the new supply started the relationship with the narc with one year of cheating with him, well aware of my existence, his girlfriend. She even knew he cheated with others, but still she welcomed him with open arms when we broke up, and plastered social media immediately with pictures of them. Well no I will not feel sorry for her. She deserves that he now cheats on her the same way he cheated on me. Thats karma for her.
Yes but he cheated on me with her. We worked together and she was mean to me. The only thing I think of is he was probably demonizing me . It hurts so bad , I do hope she gets discarded like I was on Valentine's Day for her. I don't wish her any of the physical abuse he did to me. I just hope she realizes I was not the horrible person he made me out to be.I gave so much and it was never enough.When I saw her in public gloating, like she won the prize. I know he is no prize, but a booby trap ! I have learned so much , and it has been excruciating pain, but I will never accept someone who treats me bad again.Hopefully we all heal and love ourselves enough to walk away , right away if another relationship feels bad. I wish everyone peace & love.
Is it odd that I laughed when he said he was with someone new?! If anything I feel horrible for her because I know he's going to screw her over first chance he gets.
Dr. Denise Dart, that's the only reason why I feel horrible for her because I already know that they'll come a time where he will switch it up and become a total monster towards her.
I think this is the worst phase of healing so far. Finding out about the new supply is gut wrenching. I think it’s the last straw of hope I have for the narc being burned up
I know this is a year old but thank you very much for this. Your voice is soo calming and clear to understand . I've come across many channels on this subject and you are the only one that really empathizes with its audience.
I found this video the same day I’ve been told by a mutual friend that he was walking around with his new “prey” right in front of my old job place. I was already No contact since 3/4 months, full of informations and determination to keep him away from me. But still, I felt a punch straight to my gut, I could not think about anything else, just him and this new poor girl hand in hand. As soon as I got home I tried to look for any video that could make me feel better, and here I was. Listening to your words that gave me instant relief. I slept so well that night. Realizing that I was not going to react, he tried to reach me in any possible way, but here I am, after 10 months since I said “ I HAD ENOUGH”! . I just wanna thank you so much Denise, probably without your video I would have texted him straight away, telling him how much I was hurt by his attempt to tell me “Hey, you don’t wanna hear from me? No problem, I have a plan B and I know this will destroy your confidence once again” .. Thank you so much once again .
Thank you. I hope this will help me see my ex for who he is (I'm just now realizing it) . He left me after 6 years asking for time to heal himself and "take his time", saying "I'm not looking for a new relationship, I just really need to stay by myself" and "Even if now we're apart, I'll always be there for you, you can call me if you need me. Maybe one day I'll come back to you". Now 1 month has passed, I'm almost sure he is seeing a new woman, he made a mess on the job (we work together), we lost almost all clients we had, he refuses to speak to me on the phone or meet in person and he only "allows" written messages that he answers when he wants. Now I'm also slowly becoming aware of the devaluation I went through in the last months of our relationship (he even started insulting my parents -who never did anything bad to him- and saying that I wasn't able to understand him because my mind couldn't "contain" his arguments). Now i'm trying to reach for all the positive things I can find, and I just hope I'll be able to get over all this mess and start living a joyous life. A hug to anyone who is going or has gone through all this. You're beautiful and strong.
he made all these promises to make up with me for playing me. then today i look out the window at school and saw him flirting up another girl i have never seen before. PLAYER! same thing, same cycle, over and over, all talk and no action, im soooo fed up!
He found his new supply well before I got the discard .... so he hasn’t had a day to even contemplate 🤔 OUR relationship.... not that he would have anyway ! ... I know intellectually he will treat her the same ... but in the midst of it it’s hard to know she is getting that amazing guy as I am alone and lonely starting over at 55 ... living with an elderly woman with Parkinson’s care taking 24/7 ... and she is living the dream at the moment taking MY place with his friends and family enjoying our trailer out camping all summer ... out boating in our boat ... riding on the back of our motorcycle! ... plus he finally bought a brand new black Chevy truck as I rode around in his old beater ... HE was the one with nothing when I met him and now 10 years later the tables have completely turned ... I have nothing and nobody ... he has everything and a new fling on his arm ... his house is paid for this year so he will be traveling and livingbit up with her while he bitched all the time that he couldn’t afford to take me golfing or out for dinner etc !! .... but now that I’ve got him looking good smelling good and he looks great on paper ! ... and trust me he loves his life that’s why he dates women who live in another town the one before me ... ME ... and this one after me ... lives 4 hours away compared to me 1 hour away .... he loves his freedom ... he gets to come home to peace and quiet ... his own environment... all his toys in the driveway mortgage paid off ... honestly HE IS LIVING MOST GUYS DREAM ! .... he’s completely okay not having a permanent fixture to come home to .... he doesn’t have to worry about getting caught cheating when she’s 4 hours away .... he doesn’t have to deal with her demands her wants her needs .... her PMS .... ask any man how lucky he is ! .... all his friends knew he was .... in an attractive woman and I would commute all that way for 10 years!!! .... wow this guy obviously has something we don’t ! .... I was probably just the laughing stock !
I needed to hear this bc my exnarc just informed me that hes moving in with new supply after only a 6 month relationship. I knew he was grooming a new victim but was blindsided by the fact that hes moving in with someone. I know logically that it will eventually turn out the same way as me and other victims.
Narcissistic people are usually very attractive it makes it very easy for them to find another victim very quickly. Thank god good looks is no longer a priority for me now that I'm getting older it's about the person's heart and empathy towards others that attract me the most.
Rebecca, the more we learn and actively work to heal the less likely there will ever be an attraction to this type of person again. Emotionally Abusive people don't like people with healthy boundaries. "Once your eyes are open, you can no longer not see!" 💜
I had a hell of a time. I am no exception to any rules, but my first husband killed his next wife. He died in prison awaiting trial. She was trying to leave him. So an exit strategy might be important. As I remember him, he was never going to leave, so I hid from him for years. I waited five years before getting remarried, the man I (husband number 2 )loved left me as a widow. Now I feel a little to damaged to be in any relationship. Being single is my new blessing. Just to be clear his new supply died in their expensive home in the very best neighborhood, so this subject crosses all social economic boundaries.
I keep coming back to watch this. It's helping me hang on. I'm one week out from my formal break up and he's already staying with the woman he cheated on me with and playing instant family with her. They'd been having an affair and her husband suddenly died 7weeks ago so now there is more money and he's driving her vehicles. He took off on me. I was the woman he left his ex wife for. His family laughs it off and says he's just "highly sexual" and cannot commit. But he acts like she is very different and that "I just clicked with her like I've never clicked with anyone before." Now I'm a mess and he's at a theme park playing happy family.
The relationship with the new supply may initially appear happy from the outside; give it time. He is who he is and will eventually begin to devalue her as well. Step back, put your sights back on yourself and continue the healing process. You can create the life of your dreams....you just have to let go to create space for what is yet to come.
Loved this one. Very comforting. I am no contact for a year and a half after suffering 24 years of the worst kind of torturous hell a person could go through at the hands of my narcissist. I had an accidental pregnancy and he used my baby to keep a stranglehold on me, I finally got away from him after my son was grown. I am free!!!
I may be in a relationship with a narcissist. I was going to his city to spend the weekend but last Thursday my doctor called and said I had to undergo emergency surgery on Friday to get two kidney stones removed from my ureter. He seemed to care and such. After my surgery he asked If I was ok and than at about 11 p.m he vanished. He only returned the other day at 4.33 p.m, He didn't say anything but he had gone out with friends, he was so distant when I most needed, no good night, no "how did you spend the night", it's as if he was just doing the minimum. I said what was bothering me, he didn't apologize and said I was being sensitive (I was in the hospital for God's sake). He then said he was going to some friend's party (he said if I was there he wouldn't go). He then at 01:40 am sent good night and said I was a person he wished the best in all possible ways and said good night. He partied friday and saturday and I was there "begging" for support. He is now giving me the Silence Treatment and posting things on facebook to make me go on whatsapp and ask what happened, to make me feel guilty for his behavior. I think I may be going in denial sometimes, trying to put the blame on me. I get too attached sexually as well, I miss the sex and I miss him. We haven't talked since Sunday.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful and well spoken analysis. I Feel like I need to cry about this but I’m not able to at this point but your video was very touching when you said trust me this new woman is going to experience the same thing. The entire for your experience with me has been terribly dysfunctional upsetting and a huge weight has been lifted from me with her out of my life.I have been struggling with this new supply topic since I now have confirmation my narcissist in fact was grooming new supply while still engaging intimately with me and is now out in public openly “with” the new supply. it’s just tough to imagine them off smiling and laughing and having sex and The new person thinking the narc is just so fabulous- ugh. The new supply was triangulated right from the start! my narcissist brought her and me to the same event I sat right next to her and I’m like what the fuck. But narc must’ve really told some good lies to Ensure that she didn’t run off.But in the back of my mind I’m like this new person could be my ticket out. To help me break the cycle of discard hoover - over and over. But it still hurts and I want absolutely nothing to ever do with my ex narcissist again I see her as a real force of evil and actually a little bit scary. The world needs to know about these folks- they’re scary
Plus, whatever bad things you pulled him up about, now he will be hypersensitive to being pulled up about them even more... and he won't like that at ALL... And he will have learned what behaviour to hide, and women are really intuitive and the new woman will suffer probably more than you . Because each relationship he has, he learns a little bit more how to sneak around, how to gaslight, how to lie and deceive. Be glad you are not the new woman. She has a lot to discover, and you remember that devastating feeling all too well. Yes, we should feel bad for the new woman, definitely.
That was SO GREAT to hear, Dr. G. After all, we are the ones in the relationship who actually DO care about the feelings of the other person. But confusion creeps in and I know I can 2nd guess myself. NO MORE!!
You have no idea how much you just helped me (or maybe you do) I left my Narc of 16 years, 5 months ago and I have been doing really great. My daughter just told me about his new GF and my gut just went into knots. I found this video and it was EXACTLY what I needed you touched my soul with your gentle voice and words as if they came from my mother... I went through tears of sorrow to remembering painful but necessary truths to feeling empowerd just with this one video. I have been researching this topic for almost 2 years now and nothing has touched me so deeply and genuinely like this video. Thank you so very much... Love N Light to you...
pixel lation 💜Thank you for taking the time to leave me a message. I feel blessed to be able to help other women recover and find freedom and joy after emotional abuse. I've been there and am so grateful to be able to help others.
pixel lation You have to suffer the pain to get to the other side. you will be thankful you no longer with him even thou it hurts. .your new happy life starts
Dr. Denise Dart what I would like to know is, since they don't truly love is it possible for them to have a genuine love for their children? I feel like my ex narc cud care less about me but he does share some compassion or loyalty to his children and I'm just trying to figure out how much I should trust this man with my child. It's a horrible mixed emotion process I wouldn't wish this on anybody.
For years of our relationship I though it was me. I was desperate to make it work especially having children together. Our breakup was devastating and he moved on to the next supply in a few weeks. Got her pregnant after a month of knowing her. I've never felt such pain in my life. I'm so glad for videos like this because I was in denial for way too long. Thank you.
Secondly, to the new supply who will undoubtedly end up watching a whole bunch of videos on narcissists... I'm sorry that I didn't warn you better. Even I didn't know what he was when I sent you that message. I just knew that none of it was 'right'. We are almost carbon copies...same big dumb happy smile, same nationality, same educational success...even the same photo possed for on FB...it was a shock after only a few weeks of separation. But I hope we are enough alike.... so that you too will be smart enough to get out. But I'm sorry that you have to travel the same journey. I wouldn't wish it on an enemy. He won't learn. He won't admit any fault. He won't change. He will continue to be a 'poor man' who's only love is his victim mentality. And he will continue to use, break and discard anyone who shows him any love or caring.
Married 35 years to a covert (sneaky ass) narcissist. Two years post divorce slowly healing. Still hurts but I agree that the next victim gets my compassion
Glad to hear you are on your healing journey after your long marriage. It sounds like you are wisely taking the time you need to fully heal. Life gets better and better when you put yourself on the list of people you take wonderful care of. xo
It is so comforting to hear this perspective! I left my narcissist of 2 years six months ago and found out recently that he is already already engaged. Praying for his fiancé to not ignore the red flags like I did. Thank you!
Thank you for this video, I hope you make some new ones soon. My divorce (16.5) years together was final 6 months ago and my ex-has already moved in and possibly married his #4 wife. I'm still crushed by this but I know in my heart that it's only a matter of time before he moves on from her as well. Trying to keep my head up and praying to God for direction every day.
I'm not sure how a person is supposed to feel, but I was relieved! I got the closure I needed. I am at peace, I am content and enjoying life again. I am happy he moved on and is finally leaving me alone!
@@DrDeniseDart Thank you for the reply. I just wanted to clarify all this great information can be applied to a female narcissist as well. I appreciate your content it’s helped me greatly! Much love
I’m glad to hear my videos have been helpful. I’ve noticed a growing male audience over the last couple of years and have been more mindful of adapting to that. Thank you so much for taking time to leave feedback. I appreciate you! 💜
Thank you. My ex secured supply before bailing. I regretfully let that doubt creep in that he is free, but he is a monster and there is no way anyone can cause such harm and be free. Under all my pain and doubt, I know this as truth just as clear as I breath.
My ex said he will change for the new supply , he is very happy with her and loves her. But right away he's adding me in facebook. Ive been in 4 years of abuse. He is 2 months with the new supply. I am very damaged and lost. I really changed from what I am when I met him. Thats why he hates me now. I know his game already. I told him I am studying narcissism. Im struggling now to get back my lost soul.
It’s like my 4th time being discarded by him. I was discarded-hoovered-repeat. I am confused of why I gave in. I’m glad I’ve been on my way of healing.
Thank you. I have learned a painful lesson. The positive I will take from it is I will be sure to watch if my daughter were to end up in that type of relationship as I am so very aware of the red flags now. I will never make the same mistake again and although I dread seeing him with the next person, I will hold onto your words as I know it to be true. Taking time to heal and learn to live and love again. Thank you so much for your compassion and sharing.
Thank you so much for posting this video. I found myself missing him and thinking about alot sense I saw his picture with a new girl on fb. At one point of my life I thought that we would get married and start a family. He went from he'll always love me, he would never leave me, he wanted the same things I wanted, and changed. He even put me down before he left me started looking at me funny, and he even said that my hands looked old, lost interest in me, and then gave me the I'll always love you goodbye. I keep thinking of the hell he put me through yet somehow I also missed him.
Thank you for this video. You speak clearly and with such passion and empathy. 23 years married to one and now healing after getting the courage to leave.
Amazing Dr. Dart! I just found your channel, your words are incredibly validating and authentic. It is true the next woman will also be a victim and that's unfortunate. I love your passion to help women overcome Narcissistic abusive men. Thank you, thank you and thank you again.
Wow. Thank you so much. You are helping me a lot. I just turned 20 and I am going through all the emotions of being in this type of relationship. I realized I lost sight of who I was. Bless your heart. You are helping me a lot
my ex covert narcissist returned to his first wife who he has an adult daughter with. he's never been without supply. she's currently living with her elderly mother as her caretaker. they see eachother on weekends. that's why I think this has lasted. I feel compassion for her as I've learned just as you've said...she's just another replaceable part. just a matter of time. once they are together full time...it won't last.
Taking the time to cry, to feel the feelings and then let them go is essential for healing. I'm glad you took the time and space to grieve. The process of getting to know yourself again can be challenging and exhilarating 💜 It sounds like you are doing just that. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
New supply is a blessing to us...never compare yourself....there is no comparison...even tho she's new she'll eventually get old, boring, and discarded...narcissists hate being in their own company then their demons rear they're ugly heads...trust me time and karma is on your side don't cheat yourself looking backwards but instead forward....
You are absolutely correct. I ve gone through it. I actually feel sorry for her and not jealously. I pray for the courage to start spreading the word to younger women about this .
Thank you so much for encouragement to not look back and heal while remembering that as survivors we get to move on in life while the narcissist is trapped living out their lives with themselves.
Healing and growing is an integral and essential part of being human. It is nothing short of tragic when an individual's personality is so rigid that they fail to see this truth also applies to them. Sending love and encouragement your way as you continue on your healing path. 💜
Thank you for that video. I needed to hear that today. It's been six months since I've been discarded. He moved on the very same day with a girlfriend from the past. (27 years ago he dated her.) I struggled with wondering if it was me at times. This video puts a lot of things in perspective.
I'm glad it was helpful. The truth is that all people who are truly narcissistic will keep a backup supply. Very few breakups are clean because this guy wants to keep you and all others before you hanging on with the promise of remaining friends. The truth is he was never your friend and never could be. Love shouldn't hurt! It's common for the narcissistic to have a harem in the wings. No contact keeps you out of that Harem of women in desperate need of recovery!
I was with my ex, diagnosed with NPD for 11 years, we never got married. 2 years after the final discard, he married his new supply. He told me he would never get married. I have a great job, savings account, 401k, my own home, nice car, family, friends, etc... She has nothing but a box of clothes. He chose hamburger over Prime Rib because he needed someone he could control. He couldn't control me and it drove him crazy! 😂 I hope she's "the one", then I can finally be free!!!
I dated a narcissts and once I realized it he moved on to his next victim and only after 2mos dating moved her in and proposed after 4mos he has so many people fooled even her how perfect his life is now...... But what i have learned from watching videos is completely shut him out and I did no contact and I can't be happier and at peace. I just feel bad for his new girlfriend it only took me 4yrs to realize it hope she too figures it out..... Before she goes into debt like me. But what frustrates me even more is his 11 yr old son keeps losing woman in his life that he has had genuine relationships with. I feel so bad for him the most. My broken heart has healed. This child has been scared with all the different ladies coming in and out his life how sad is this. His own father is basiclly teaching him to become a narcisst in his future. He will never be able to trust anyone
Hi Doctor Denise Hart. I Had A Beautiful Life.And Out Of No Where.I Met A Narcissists..This Person Convinced Me That He Was The Nicest Person On Eart.This Person Discarded Me Emotionally Abused Horribly Beaten Me Dwn.After Being Discarded I Was Diagnosed With Tinnitus And Severe Anxiety.How Do I Get My Life Back...I Struggle With Going No Contact.....
Thank-you for your video. I am still feeling scared and confused though. We were 20 when we married, within a month I was pregnant and went on to have 8 pregnancies and 4 healthy children with my covert narc ex. He controlled every aspect of my life. I lost my skills and talents, my damaged cognitive function won’t allow me to study. I have nerve damage affecting my mobility. I’m isolated with no supportive friends or family ( they supported him) I left him 18 months ago. Now he has a beautiful young independent new supply with a job and a home and a car: license. She is not the damaged vulnerable young girl that I was when we met, so I can’t see him behaving like that with her. He’s 10 yrs older so surely he is going to realise that he can’t do the same to her and expect her to stick around. I built his life in this country including a successful business which he has kept me under financial abuse refusing a penny of the income. I’m left a full time single mum in a run down isolated area with no prospects, bad health, debt- meanwhile he is buying new cars and designer clothes and taking her and her children on expensive trips. I have no idea how to get any justice served through courts as I have no money for barristers. I just feel broken and hopeless all over again. Any advice is gratefully accepted, thank-you.
Yes remember it all too well and still very painful. Not looking forward to seeing him with a new woman on his arm as I am still grieving this whole experience. I also remember that at the very beginning he told me when this thing is over I will know when he is done with me. OUCH. I should have known right there. Red Flag...and yeah he also said, that this ( relationship) will affect him or the break up of it won't affect or phase him and he'll be over this so quickly. It's like a small anthill to climb over. It was all right there. I just couldn't believe it... I didn't want to..Oh boy. There should be a dating data bank and people could get reviews and red flagged. Only in my imagination.. I've seen him already with another woman and pretty sure he was with other women when he was pretending to still be in relationship with me. I so badly wanted to check her out and wondered what made him be attracted to her and who is she and what does she have that I don't...but I am starting to understand that it doesn't work like this with people like that. It's a very devastating experience to say the least. Thank you again for your channel and putting these good words and information out to us, that really need to hear and learn this...
In tears rn... we've been together for 9 yrs, we have 2 kids together. We've traveled together. I'm hurt, but I step back and look at myself and now I'm trying to heal
The best video on the subject that doesn't attempt to devalue the next woman (or the old woman he goes back to). They like to make you think you're losing out and that is a huge trick of the mind, a huge conditioning that once you were 'the chosen one' and now you're not. Ladies, no one is the chosen one. And like he said to me a couple of months ago in a failed hoovering (while still being married to the woman who must have terrible self-esteem) , 'I'm not committed to anyone'. Believe it. The wife thinks she's won it all, passing on her own dysfunctional upbringing on to her children. Her daughter will be this woman one day. Pity them.
This is such a great video. Thank you! It popped when I needed to be reminded of exactly these words. Everything you mention is exactly how it goes... I'm so grateful.
THANK YOU!! This was so so helpful to me! He has moved on to his new supply (though he still calls here and there and I don't answer anymore) and it was driving me crazy and hurting so much to think he will now be faithful to her. I have felt that since he is 75 years old and have had his ample supply of women through out his life, he will settle down with this one and marry her. We were engaged to be married 12/15/15 and he basically left me at the alter! I finally found the courage and self respect to give him back his rings two months ago. And guess what I have dreaded? Yelp! That he will give the engagement ring to the new supply and this time marry her because she is some how better than me. That tormented me to no end! He has money and I don't have very much so I can't the vacations we've taken. He just told me a few weeks ago (still answered his calls then) to go ahead and book a trip for us to the Grand Canyon. I didn't reply. I ignored him! I want to go so badly, but not with him! But of course I said I guess he will take her now. However, after listening to your video I can let this toxic way of thinking go now and face reality. Who he is is who he is and he will be that with her too! But it will take more time for me to fully heal. I have been alone for 1 yr now and facing my own issues. I do feel better being out of that relationship. And if I can only silence my fears about him being older and therefore will do better with her, I can completely move on! Thanks again!
tHIS IS GOOD FOR THE TARGET...tHE GAME WITH THESE MEN AND WOMEN IS UNENDING AND YOU ARE BLESSED AND FREE,KEEP MOVING FORWARD ITS NOT HOW YOU THINK AND THEY ESCALATE WITH THE GAMES AS THEY AGE,NOW TO BE FREE OF THAT IS AWESOME !
Thank you for you comment. It's not about my paradigm, it's simply that I've chosen to work primarily with women. Check out my video on this type of behavior from both men and women. You are absolutely right just focusing on women in these particular videos 💜
Dr. GLASSMYER thank you thank you and big thank you!!! It's very comforting... will you be making video about when your Narc ex spread rumors about you you and deflects everything on you and call you Narc when you stand up for yourself... my ex call me damaged good and all other names and it's ingrained in me .. I can't think anything else out of it... it's just too painful. My ex Narc was and is poison to my soul and thoughts but I can't stop thinking about him. He has been blocked everywhere.. most toughest part is thinking about him getting intimate with other and I can't move on. I feel like intimacy will never ever be the same again with anyone else. Like he have some kind of hold on me .. kinda spell.. will you please help me with this or give some tools how to cope with it?- thank you millions
Very good and insightful video. I have to compliment you on the great production of your video. The visual is a high quality and the audio, your voice, is loud and clear. There are so many You Tube videos that for example you can barely hear and understand the person speaking.
Thirty days after I left my narcissist, he married the bar skank he swore he was not having anything to do with, MARRIED! Who does that? I left him because I could not endure anymore abuse. He begged me to stay swore he wasn't seeing other women, but yet he was. I know I made the right decision but it still is a horrific experience.
T Martin something similar happened to me!!!! he married the woman he betrayed me for...he tried to keep me around while he was pursuing her!? he lied, decieved, tricked her, me & everyone...he takes no responsibility in marrying her...he states that his parents forced him...they pressed him to marry her because she is a doctor---good image & $$$$...I'm an RN...so basically he screwed me over for a better deal...he's stated that he doesn't care or love her at all?!?
although I've had sensitive feelings towards her, I feel sorry for her...she bought all the bs he fed her...marriage & bought 500k house...of course the $$ that he contributed wasn't his...it was his parents
T Martin my ex husband I was married to for seven years together 11 years after our divorce two months later moved another woman into the house we had built together and then married her three months after moving her in. I understand this shock. I'm trying to move forward too just happened recently.
I have no words, I know how horrible you feel. It is an experience only a survivor knows. I think I am more upset over my stupidity than anything else. But truly you don't expect other human beings to be so horrible. Best of luck to you. You are free, now it's just healing the wounds.
Oh my. I am so sorry that happened. Thank goodness you have moved on.
*Time reveals all truths.*
Wishing love and power to Narc Abuse survivors. 💕
My EMDR trauma therapist told me to EXPECT the Nex to be with another woman!
She said it’s the nature of this personality type to need someone in his/her life.
So, as I’ve healed more and more with therapy and no contact, I have placed another woman in the Nex’s vehicle (in my mind).
Because of my experience with him, I have great empathy for any woman who is in relationship with him.
I’m not saying that I might not feel a momentary twitch of angst, should I actually see him with another woman. I will have to give myself a “reality check” and say to myself that she isn’t better than I, that he isn’t happier. It is all “smoke and mirrors” with him.
FAKE is what it is, because HE’s fake!
Loving my freedom from tyranny!
Blessings!❤️
When you get enough space to begin to hear your own internal voice the second guessing will go away 💜
I really needed this. My narc decided he wants to divorce me while I'm 7 months pregnant. I found out there's someone else, she's now pregnant and they are acting like the "perfect" couple.
i don’t feel bad for my ex’s new supply. there are things that i know about her that he doesn’t know. seems like they found their match. karma coming soon.
I just wanted to say, that his new supply didn't have compassion for me and our kids, she knew about me and our kids, so no, I don't have compassion for that jezebel harlot.
If the new supply started the relationship with the narc with one year of cheating with him, well aware of my existence, his girlfriend. She even knew he cheated with others, but still she welcomed him with open arms when we broke up, and plastered social media immediately with pictures of them. Well no I will not feel sorry for her. She deserves that he now cheats on her the same way he cheated on me.
Thats karma for her.
Relationships that begin with with lies and deceit generally end in the same way. Karma, no doubt.
Same! She deserves everything she gets
I love the interchangeable 'car parts' analogy. Thank you, Dr. Dart!
At one point in my own journey I felt as though I’d been lost amongst the real car parts 😊 This analogy is near to my heart 😉
Yes but he cheated on me with her. We worked together and she was mean to me. The only thing I think of is he was probably demonizing me . It hurts so bad , I do hope she gets discarded like I was on Valentine's Day for her. I don't wish her any of the physical abuse he did to me. I just hope she realizes I was not the horrible person he made me out to be.I gave so much and it was never enough.When I saw her in public gloating, like she won the prize. I know he is no prize, but a booby trap ! I have learned so much , and it has been excruciating pain, but I will never accept someone who treats me bad again.Hopefully we all heal and love ourselves enough to walk away , right away if another relationship feels bad. I wish everyone peace & love.
💜 and the same peace and love to you Emily.
Is it odd that I laughed when he said he was with someone new?! If anything I feel horrible for her because I know he's going to screw her over first chance he gets.
I’m glad you know that he will continue to be who he is. There may be a honeymoon phase but eventually he will show his true colors.
Dr. Denise Dart, that's the only reason why I feel horrible for her because I already know that they'll come a time where he will switch it up and become a total monster towards her.
I think this is the worst phase of healing so far. Finding out about the new supply is gut wrenching. I think it’s the last straw of hope I have for the narc being burned up
I know this is a year old but thank you very much for this. Your voice is soo calming and clear to understand . I've come across many channels on this subject and you are the only one that really empathizes with its audience.
Thank you Jennifer 💜
I found this video the same day I’ve been told by a mutual friend that he was walking around with his new “prey” right in front of my old job place. I was already No contact since 3/4 months, full of informations and determination to keep him away from me. But still, I felt a punch straight to my gut, I could not think about anything else, just him and this new poor girl hand in hand. As soon as I got home I tried to look for any video that could make me feel better, and here I was. Listening to your words that gave me instant relief. I slept so well that night. Realizing that I was not going to react, he tried to reach me in any possible way, but here I am, after 10 months since I said “ I HAD ENOUGH”! . I just wanna thank you so much Denise, probably without your video I would have texted him straight away, telling him how much I was hurt by his attempt to tell me “Hey, you don’t wanna hear from me? No problem, I have a plan B and I know this will destroy your confidence once again” .. Thank you so much once again .
YES!! Compassion for the new girl, she will be blind sided too. Thank you.
Thank you. I hope this will help me see my ex for who he is (I'm just now realizing it) . He left me after 6 years asking for time to heal himself and "take his time", saying "I'm not looking for a new relationship, I just really need to stay by myself" and "Even if now we're apart, I'll always be there for you, you can call me if you need me. Maybe one day I'll come back to you". Now 1 month has passed, I'm almost sure he is seeing a new woman, he made a mess on the job (we work together), we lost almost all clients we had, he refuses to speak to me on the phone or meet in person and he only "allows" written messages that he answers when he wants. Now I'm also slowly becoming aware of the devaluation I went through in the last months of our relationship (he even started insulting my parents -who never did anything bad to him- and saying that I wasn't able to understand him because my mind couldn't "contain" his arguments). Now i'm trying to reach for all the positive things I can find, and I just hope I'll be able to get over all this mess and start living a joyous life. A hug to anyone who is going or has gone through all this. You're beautiful and strong.
4 weeks separated anger has been replaced by so much pain. Thank you so much for sharing this. You actually saved my life this evening x
he made all these promises to make up with me for playing me. then today i look out the window at school and saw him flirting up another girl i have never seen before. PLAYER! same thing, same cycle, over and over, all talk and no action, im soooo fed up!
It’s all about the behavior. The abuser’s words are empty and intended to deceive rather than come to mutual understanding.
He found his new supply well before I got the discard .... so he hasn’t had a day to even contemplate 🤔 OUR relationship.... not that he would have anyway ! ... I know intellectually he will treat her the same ... but in the midst of it it’s hard to know she is getting that amazing guy as I am alone and lonely starting over at 55 ... living with an elderly woman with Parkinson’s care taking 24/7 ... and she is living the dream at the moment taking MY place with his friends and family enjoying our trailer out camping all summer ... out boating in our boat ... riding on the back of our motorcycle! ... plus he finally bought a brand new black Chevy truck as I rode around in his old beater ... HE was the one with nothing when I met him and now 10 years later the tables have completely turned ... I have nothing and nobody ... he has everything and a new fling on his arm ... his house is paid for this year so he will be traveling and livingbit up with her while he bitched all the time that he couldn’t afford to take me golfing or out for dinner etc !! .... but now that I’ve got him looking good smelling good and he looks great on paper ! ... and trust me he loves his life that’s why he dates women who live in another town the one before me ... ME ... and this one after me ... lives 4 hours away compared to me 1 hour away .... he loves his freedom ... he gets to come home to peace and quiet ... his own environment... all his toys in the driveway mortgage paid off ... honestly HE IS LIVING MOST GUYS DREAM ! .... he’s completely okay not having a permanent fixture to come home to .... he doesn’t have to worry about getting caught cheating when she’s 4 hours away .... he doesn’t have to deal with her demands her wants her needs .... her PMS .... ask any man how lucky he is ! .... all his friends knew he was .... in an attractive woman and I would commute all that way for 10 years!!! .... wow this guy obviously has something we don’t ! .... I was probably just the laughing stock !
I needed to hear this bc my exnarc just informed me that hes moving in with new supply after only a 6 month relationship. I knew he was grooming a new victim but was blindsided by the fact that hes moving in with someone. I know logically that it will eventually turn out the same way as me and other victims.
Narcissistic people are usually very attractive it makes it very easy for them to find another victim very quickly. Thank god good looks is no longer a priority for me now that I'm getting older it's about the person's heart and empathy towards others that attract me the most.
Rebecca, the more we learn and actively work to heal the less likely there will ever be an attraction to this type of person again. Emotionally Abusive people don't like people with healthy boundaries. "Once your eyes are open, you can no longer not see!" 💜
I feel like this talk just saved my heart from unbearable pain.. thank you.
I had a hell of a time. I am no exception to any rules, but my first husband killed his next wife. He died in prison awaiting trial. She was trying to leave him. So an exit strategy might be important. As I remember him, he was never going to leave, so I hid from him for years.
I waited five years before getting remarried, the man I (husband number 2 )loved left me as a widow.
Now I feel a little to damaged to be in any relationship.
Being single is my new blessing.
Just to be clear his new supply died in their expensive home in the very best neighborhood, so this subject crosses all social economic boundaries.
I keep coming back to watch this. It's helping me hang on. I'm one week out from my formal break up and he's already staying with the woman he cheated on me with and playing instant family with her. They'd been having an affair and her husband suddenly died 7weeks ago so now there is more money and he's driving her vehicles. He took off on me. I was the woman he left his ex wife for. His family laughs it off and says he's just "highly sexual" and cannot commit. But he acts like she is very different and that "I just clicked with her like I've never clicked with anyone before." Now I'm a mess and he's at a theme park playing happy family.
The relationship with the new supply may initially appear happy from the outside; give it time. He is who he is and will eventually begin to devalue her as well. Step back, put your sights back on yourself and continue the healing process. You can create the life of your dreams....you just have to let go to create space for what is yet to come.
The cycle of narcissistic abuse and the pathology of the narcissist will do their harm on her too.
Loved this one. Very comforting. I am no contact for a year and a half after suffering 24 years of the worst kind of torturous hell a person could go through at the hands of my narcissist. I had an accidental pregnancy and he used my baby to keep a stranglehold on me, I finally got away from him after my son was grown. I am free!!!
that is so true I was born again after him and I am so happy to love myself again❤️
I may be in a relationship with a narcissist. I was going to his city to spend the weekend but last Thursday my doctor called and said I had to undergo emergency surgery on Friday to get two kidney stones removed from my ureter. He seemed to care and such. After my surgery he asked If I was ok and than at about 11 p.m he vanished. He only returned the other day at 4.33 p.m, He didn't say anything but he had gone out with friends, he was so distant when I most needed, no good night, no "how did you spend the night", it's as if he was just doing the minimum. I said what was bothering me, he didn't apologize and said I was being sensitive (I was in the hospital for God's sake). He then said he was going to some friend's party (he said if I was there he wouldn't go). He then at 01:40 am sent good night and said I was a person he wished the best in all possible ways and said good night. He partied friday and saturday and I was there "begging" for support. He is now giving me the Silence Treatment and posting things on facebook to make me go on whatsapp and ask what happened, to make me feel guilty for his behavior. I think I may be going in denial sometimes, trying to put the blame on me. I get too attached sexually as well, I miss the sex and I miss him. We haven't talked since Sunday.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful and well spoken analysis. I Feel like I need to cry about this but I’m not able to at this point but your video was very touching when you said trust me this new woman is going to experience the same thing. The entire for your experience with me has been terribly dysfunctional upsetting and a huge weight has been lifted from me with her out of my life.I have been struggling with this new supply topic since I now have confirmation my narcissist in fact was grooming new supply while still engaging intimately with me and is now out in public openly “with” the new supply. it’s just tough to imagine them off smiling and laughing and having sex and The new person thinking the narc is just so fabulous- ugh. The new supply was triangulated right from the start! my narcissist brought her and me to the same event I sat right next to her and I’m like what the fuck. But narc must’ve really told some good lies to Ensure that she didn’t run off.But in the back of my mind I’m like this new person could be my ticket out. To help me break the cycle of discard hoover - over and over. But it still hurts and I want absolutely nothing to ever do with my ex narcissist again I see her as a real force of evil and actually a little bit scary. The world needs to know about these folks- they’re scary
Plus, whatever bad things you pulled him up about, now he will be hypersensitive to being pulled up about them even more... and he won't like that at ALL...
And he will have learned what behaviour to hide, and women are really intuitive and the new woman will suffer probably more than you
. Because each relationship he has, he learns a little bit more how to sneak around, how to gaslight, how to lie and deceive. Be glad you are not the new woman. She has a lot to discover, and you remember that devastating feeling all too well. Yes, we should feel bad for the new woman, definitely.
That was SO GREAT to hear, Dr. G. After all, we are the ones in the relationship who actually DO care about the feelings of the other person. But confusion creeps in and I know I can 2nd guess myself. NO MORE!!
Thanks for this! I’m a guy that just got out of a narcissist relationship. It’s refreshing to hear that people are thriving after this.
You have no idea how much you just helped me (or maybe you do) I left my Narc of 16 years, 5 months ago and I have been doing really great. My daughter just told me about his new GF and my gut just went into knots. I found this video and it was EXACTLY what I needed you touched my soul with your gentle voice and words as if they came from my mother... I went through tears of sorrow to remembering painful but necessary truths to feeling empowerd just with this one video. I have been researching this topic for almost 2 years now and nothing has touched me so deeply and genuinely like this video. Thank you so very much...
Love N Light to you...
pixel lation 💜Thank you for taking the time to leave me a message. I feel blessed to be able to help other women recover and find freedom and joy after emotional abuse. I've been there and am so grateful to be able to help others.
pixel lation
You have to suffer the pain to get to the other side. you will be thankful you no longer with him even thou it hurts. .your new happy life starts
Dr. Denise Dart what I would like to know is, since they don't truly love is it possible for them to have a genuine love for their children? I feel like my ex narc cud care less about me but he does share some compassion or loyalty to his children and I'm just trying to figure out how much I should trust this man with my child. It's a horrible mixed emotion process I wouldn't wish this on anybody.
Sarah Howard w
So very loving, nourishing, comforting and healing. Thank you.🌹
Thank you when I get that feeling this is the best video to watch to get your mind back on track
For years of our relationship I though it was me. I was desperate to make it work especially having children together. Our breakup was devastating and he moved on to the next supply in a few weeks. Got her pregnant after a month of knowing her. I've never felt such pain in my life. I'm so glad for videos like this because I was in denial for way too long. Thank you.
Secondly, to the new supply who will undoubtedly end up watching a whole bunch of videos on narcissists... I'm sorry that I didn't warn you better. Even I didn't know what he was when I sent you that message. I just knew that none of it was 'right'. We are almost carbon copies...same big dumb happy smile, same nationality, same educational success...even the same photo possed for on FB...it was a shock after only a few weeks of separation. But I hope we are enough alike.... so that you too will be smart enough to get out. But I'm sorry that you have to travel the same journey. I wouldn't wish it on an enemy.
He won't learn. He won't admit any fault. He won't change. He will continue to be a 'poor man' who's only love is his victim mentality. And he will continue to use, break and discard anyone who shows him any love or caring.
Married 35 years to a covert (sneaky ass) narcissist. Two years post divorce slowly healing. Still hurts but I agree that the next victim gets my compassion
Glad to hear you are on your healing journey after your long marriage. It sounds like you are wisely taking the time you need to fully heal. Life gets better and better when you put yourself on the list of people you take wonderful care of. xo
It is so comforting to hear this perspective! I left my narcissist of 2 years six months ago and found out recently that he is already already engaged. Praying for his fiancé to not ignore the red flags like I did. Thank you!
Thank you for taking the time to provide feedback. I'm happy the video brought you come comfort.
Send her a thank you card!
You're welcome Stormy! 💜
U r right....he moves on with his life with who he is....forever an abuser.
Thank you for this video, I hope you make some new ones soon. My divorce (16.5) years together was final 6 months ago and my ex-has already moved in and possibly married his #4 wife. I'm still crushed by this but I know in my heart that it's only a matter of time before he moves on from her as well. Trying to keep my head up and praying to God for direction every day.
I needed to hear this. I’m crying.😢
I'm not sure how a person is supposed to feel, but I was relieved! I got the closure I needed. I am at peace, I am content and enjoying life again.
I am happy he moved on and is finally leaving me alone!
What a lovely calm vibe you have. Thank you for this x x
This applies to men that have been abused by a narcissist as well. I know all about it
Absolutely, this is not a gender specific problem. My channel was designed for a primarily female audience. The information applies to all.
@@DrDeniseDart Thank you for the reply. I just wanted to clarify all this great information can be applied to a female narcissist as well. I appreciate your content it’s helped me greatly! Much love
I’m glad to hear my videos have been helpful. I’ve noticed a growing male audience over the last couple of years and have been more mindful of adapting to that. Thank you so much for taking time to leave feedback. I appreciate you! 💜
I have just come out of a 14 year marriage with a narc. He has now moved on already. Thank you so much for this video. It has helped so much.
You're so welcome! Thank you for taking the time to leave feedback. 💜
Thank you so much! I needed this today! What a horrid experience my life with him proved to be but how evolved I have become! Bless us in our healing!
Yes!! 💜
Thank you. My ex secured supply before bailing. I regretfully let that doubt creep in that he is free, but he is a monster and there is no way anyone can cause such harm and be free. Under all my pain and doubt, I know this as truth just as clear as I breath.
My ex said he will change for the new supply , he is very happy with her and loves her. But right away he's adding me in facebook. Ive been in 4 years of abuse. He is 2 months with the new supply. I am very damaged and lost. I really changed from what I am when I met him. Thats why he hates me now. I know his game already. I told him I am studying narcissism. Im struggling now to get back my lost soul.
It’s like my 4th time being discarded by him. I was discarded-hoovered-repeat. I am confused of why I gave in. I’m glad I’ve been on my way of healing.
Thank you so much! That car analogy was spot on!
I love you . this video has helped me with my healing process
Thank you. I have learned a painful lesson. The positive I will take from it is I will be sure to watch if my daughter were to end up in that type of relationship as I am so very aware of the red flags now. I will never make the same mistake again and although I dread seeing him with the next person, I will hold onto your words as I know it to be true. Taking time to heal and learn to live and love again. Thank you so much for your compassion and sharing.
Thank you so much for posting this video. I found myself missing him and thinking about alot sense I saw his picture with a new girl on fb. At one point of my life I thought that we would get married and start a family. He went from he'll always love me, he would never leave me, he wanted the same things I wanted, and changed. He even put me down before he left me started looking at me funny, and he even said that my hands looked old, lost interest in me, and then gave me the I'll always love you goodbye. I keep thinking of the hell he put me through yet somehow I also missed him.
Thank you for this video. You speak clearly and with such passion and empathy. 23 years married to one and now healing after getting the courage to leave.
Amazing Dr. Dart! I just found your channel, your words are incredibly validating and authentic. It is true the next woman will also be a victim and that's unfortunate. I love your passion to help women overcome Narcissistic abusive men.
Thank you, thank you and thank you again.
💜💜💜
You're welcome Francesca 💜
Wow. Thank you so much. You are helping me a lot. I just turned 20 and I am going through all the emotions of being in this type of relationship. I realized I lost sight of who I was. Bless your heart. You are helping me a lot
my ex covert narcissist returned to his first wife who he has an adult daughter with.
he's never been without supply. she's currently living with her elderly mother as her caretaker. they see eachother on weekends. that's why I think this has lasted. I feel compassion for her as I've learned just as you've said...she's just another replaceable part. just a matter of time. once they are together full time...it won't last.
Taking the time to cry, to feel the feelings and then let them go is essential for healing. I'm glad you took the time and space to grieve. The process of getting to know yourself again can be challenging and exhilarating 💜 It sounds like you are doing just that. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
My ex erased the times he hit me or cheated he would just act like nothing happened it hurt so bad
He will go with the WHO he is.
My ex made me feel like I wasn't as good as the one he's with now like I'm a piece of rubbish
New supply is a blessing to us...never compare yourself....there is no comparison...even tho she's new she'll eventually get old, boring, and discarded...narcissists hate being in their own company then their demons rear they're ugly heads...trust me time and karma is on your side don't cheat yourself looking backwards but instead forward....
You are absolutely correct. I ve gone through it. I actually feel sorry for her and not jealously. I pray for the courage to start spreading the word to younger women about this .
Thank you so much for encouragement to not look back and heal while remembering that as survivors we get to move on in life while the narcissist is trapped living out their lives with themselves.
Healing and growing is an integral and essential part of being human. It is nothing short of tragic when an individual's personality is so rigid that they fail to see this truth also applies to them. Sending love and encouragement your way as you continue on your healing path. 💜
Thank you so much, it was all i already knew still needed to hear again. By the way you reminds me of Lady Diana. So calm and Beautiful 💗
Thank you for that video. I needed to hear that today. It's been six months since I've been discarded. He moved on the very same day with a girlfriend from the past. (27 years ago he dated her.) I struggled with wondering if it was me at times. This video puts a lot of things in perspective.
I'm glad it was helpful. The truth is that all people who are truly narcissistic will keep a backup supply. Very few breakups are clean because this guy wants to keep you and all others before you hanging on with the promise of remaining friends. The truth is he was never your friend and never could be. Love shouldn't hurt! It's common for the narcissistic to have a harem in the wings. No contact keeps you out of that Harem of women in desperate need of recovery!
thank you ...34 years. You give me hope
I was with my ex, diagnosed with NPD for 11 years, we never got married. 2 years after the final discard, he married his new supply. He told me he would never get married.
I have a great job, savings account, 401k, my own home, nice car, family, friends, etc... She has nothing but a box of clothes.
He chose hamburger over Prime Rib because he needed someone he could control. He couldn't control me and it drove him crazy! 😂
I hope she's "the one", then I can finally be free!!!
I dated a narcissts and once I realized it he moved on to his next victim and only after 2mos dating moved her in and proposed after 4mos he has so many people fooled even her how perfect his life is now...... But what i have learned from watching videos is completely shut him out and I did no contact and I can't be happier and at peace. I just feel bad for his new girlfriend it only took me 4yrs to realize it hope she too figures it out..... Before she goes into debt like me. But what frustrates me even more is his 11 yr old son keeps losing woman in his life that he has had genuine relationships with. I feel so bad for him the most. My broken heart has healed. This child has been scared with all the different ladies coming in and out his life how sad is this. His own father is basiclly teaching him to become a narcisst in his future. He will never be able to trust anyone
I was a fool
I believed his lies again and took him back a second time I need to break free and fully fully recover .
Hi Doctor Denise Hart.
I Had A Beautiful Life.And
Out Of No Where.I Met A Narcissists..This Person Convinced Me That He Was The Nicest Person On Eart.This Person Discarded Me Emotionally Abused Horribly Beaten Me Dwn.After Being Discarded I Was Diagnosed With Tinnitus And Severe Anxiety.How Do I Get My Life Back...I Struggle With Going No Contact.....
Yes mam, you speak lots of wisdom here. I wish many women in the world who are with narcissistic toxic men could know and understand this.
Surviving with relief n solace with this video.
Thank-you for your video. I am still feeling scared and confused though. We were 20 when we married, within a month I was pregnant and went on to have 8 pregnancies and 4 healthy children with my covert narc ex. He controlled every aspect of my life. I lost my skills and talents, my damaged cognitive function won’t allow me to study. I have nerve damage affecting my mobility. I’m isolated with no supportive friends or family ( they supported him) I left him 18 months ago. Now he has a beautiful young independent new supply with a job and a home and a car: license. She is not the damaged vulnerable young girl that I was when we met, so I can’t see him behaving like that with her. He’s 10 yrs older so surely he is going to realise that he can’t do the same to her and expect her to stick around. I built his life in this country including a successful business which he has kept me under financial abuse refusing a penny of the income. I’m left a full time single mum in a run down isolated area with no prospects, bad health, debt- meanwhile he is buying new cars and designer clothes and taking her and her children on expensive trips. I have no idea how to get any justice served through courts as I have no money for barristers. I just feel broken and hopeless all over again. Any advice is gratefully accepted, thank-you.
Yes remember it all too well and still very painful. Not looking forward to seeing him with a new woman on his arm as I am still grieving this whole experience. I also remember that at the very beginning he told me when this thing is over I will know when he is done with me. OUCH. I should have known right there. Red Flag...and yeah he also said, that this ( relationship) will affect him or the break up of it won't affect or phase him and he'll be over this so quickly. It's like a small anthill to climb over. It was all right there. I just couldn't believe it... I didn't want to..Oh boy. There should be a dating data bank and people could get reviews and red flagged. Only in my imagination.. I've seen him already with another woman and pretty sure he was with other women when he was pretending to still be in relationship with me. I so badly wanted to check her out and wondered what made him be attracted to her and who is she and what does she have that I don't...but I am starting to understand that it doesn't work like this with people like that. It's a very devastating experience to say the least. Thank you again for your channel and putting these good words and information out to us, that really need to hear and learn this...
In tears rn... we've been together for 9 yrs, we have 2 kids together. We've traveled together. I'm hurt, but I step back and look at myself and now I'm trying to heal
I'm going through this now it's so hard
Kim Michaud Me too Kim it's so difficult. I pray Gods vengeance be upon all narcissists they're evil vile creatures.
Me too.. Did you manage?
couldn't agree more to every thing you have said :) thank you
Thanks! I so needed this!
Excellent information! Thank you so much for sharing this.
I wish I had found this video years ago, when I felt I couldn’t survive him leaving me for someone else. I don’t know how I made it.
Take it and run and never look back at the first sign of cheeting. There are many women all are women of his dream
I left my narc 5 mo ago and watch this over and over. This clip is so comforting.💕
I’m happy you find comfort here Cheryl 💜
The best video on the subject that doesn't attempt to devalue the next woman (or the old woman he goes back to).
They like to make you think you're losing out and that is a huge trick of the mind, a huge conditioning that once you were 'the chosen one' and now you're not. Ladies, no one is the chosen one. And like he said to me a couple of months ago in a failed hoovering (while still being married to the woman who must have terrible self-esteem) , 'I'm not committed to anyone'. Believe it. The wife thinks she's won it all, passing on her own dysfunctional upbringing on to her children. Her daughter will be this woman one day. Pity them.
Mèrci Beacoup Dr! This was really comforting 😘
ChassyFaye Boutte. I'm glad to hear that 💜
Thank you so much. You have helped me heal so much!
This is such a great video. Thank you! It popped when I needed to be reminded of exactly these words. Everything you mention is exactly how it goes... I'm so grateful.
I’m so glad it was helpful. 💜
THANK YOU!! This was so so helpful to me! He has moved on to his new supply (though he still calls here and there and I don't answer anymore) and it was driving me crazy and hurting so much to think he will now be faithful to her. I have felt that since he is 75 years old and have had his ample supply of women through out his life, he will settle down with this one and marry her. We were engaged to be married 12/15/15 and he basically left me at the alter! I finally found the courage and self respect to give him back his rings two months ago. And guess what I have dreaded? Yelp! That he will give the engagement ring to the new supply and this time marry her because she is some how better than me. That tormented me to no end! He has money and I don't have very much so I can't the vacations we've taken. He just told me a few weeks ago (still answered his calls then) to go ahead and book a trip for us to the Grand Canyon. I didn't reply. I ignored him! I want to go so badly, but not with him! But of course I said I guess he will take her now. However, after listening to your video I can let this toxic way of thinking go now and face reality. Who he is is who he is and he will be that with her too! But it will take more time for me to fully heal. I have been alone for 1 yr now and facing my own issues. I do feel better being out of that relationship. And if I can only silence my fears about him being older and therefore will do better with her, I can completely move on! Thanks again!
tHIS IS GOOD FOR THE TARGET...tHE GAME WITH THESE MEN AND WOMEN IS UNENDING AND YOU ARE BLESSED AND FREE,KEEP MOVING FORWARD ITS NOT HOW YOU THINK AND THEY ESCALATE WITH THE GAMES AS THEY AGE,NOW TO BE FREE OF THAT IS AWESOME !
Great video. Thank you for this.
Thank you for you comment. It's not about my paradigm, it's simply that I've chosen to work primarily with women. Check out my video on this type of behavior from both men and women. You are absolutely right just focusing on women in these particular videos 💜
this video is so helpful! I was about to perish from heartache, thank you so much!
Dr. GLASSMYER thank you thank you and big thank you!!! It's very comforting... will you be making video about when your Narc ex spread rumors about you you and deflects everything on you and call you Narc when you stand up for yourself... my ex call me damaged good and all other names and it's ingrained in me .. I can't think anything else out of it... it's just too painful. My ex Narc was and is poison to my soul and thoughts but I can't stop thinking about him. He has been blocked everywhere..
most toughest part is thinking about him getting intimate with other and I can't move on. I feel like intimacy will never ever be the same again with anyone else. Like he have some kind of hold on me .. kinda spell.. will you please help me with this or give some tools how to cope with it?- thank you millions
Very good and insightful video. I have to compliment you on the great production of your video. The visual is a high quality and the audio, your voice, is loud and clear. There are so many You Tube videos that for example you can barely hear and understand the person speaking.
Excellent analysis. Thank you very much. I hope you are still active on YT.
Thank you. Compassion Always. Was always made to feel stupid for my good qualities. Wanted me to be more like him!