Personally I don't see an injured hand as an excuse. I washed dishes with a cast on my hand/forearm. Sure I wrapped myself in plastic foil first, but I still did the dishes. (Mom wasn't home, night shift, and we didn't have a dishwasher and I wanted to help out)
OP's father was a total AH for disrespecting his dead wife's memory in front of his daughter. Amanda (Dad's mistress) escalated the conflict by following and harassing her. OP showed incredible restraint and class.
The divorce for a computer. She should just say to the friends who say "How she would feel if" "How would you feel if you earned all the money, did all the household stuff, earned a bonus by working really hard and your husband took every penny and told you, that he would ALLOW you to replace your old worn shoes when you earn more money, whilst he does nothing"
Period story: i find it so ironic that the people with the problem with OPs daughters period are other *women* in her life, while the only person defending her is a man. It’s just funny that society expects men to find periods disgusting, but it’s the women making their sons like that.
Exactly, happens far too often, never understood why women are so happy to be sexist against women like that. Period positivity would be so much easier to achieve if these women weren’t teaching their sons to be grossed out by a completely natural bodily function women live with.
@@ZombieSazza Or worse, teach their daughters to be disgusted by their own periods. Male misogynists suck and female misogynists really suck. It's way past time to end the disrespect toward menstruation. Really good mothers -- and really good fathers-- of sons would never teach them to be disgusted by a woman's menstrual periods, they would teach their sons to know the difference between menstrual pads, tampons, menstrual sponges, menstrual cups, and menstrual discs and then be supportive of the women and daughters in their lives because those women and those daughters will certainly have menstrual periods. Really good mothers -- and really good fathers -- of daughters would also never teach them to be disgusted by their own menstrual periods, they would teach their daughters to know the difference between menstrual pads, tampons, menstrual sponges, menstrual cups, and menstrual discs and then teach them how to not accept any period-shaming from anybody in their lives, including their family members and the men and sons in their lives.
I grew up with male family members understanding periods are normal and some times i forgot to wrap up a pad when I first started having them and just gave me small reminders that "hey, we don't care about it but just remember to wrap them up" and I started reminding myself to wrap up the pads...fast forward to dating and the first guy I dated in highschool was SO disgusted by the thought of me going "hey, i am on my period so I just want to lay in bed" that his mother went on a tirade at me for "disgusting her baby boy"....i dumped him right there on the spot and walked away. I've learned that men are only disgusted by periods by the woman who raised them...most men i know are cool with periods because their dad and mom made them know its normal.
I grew up in a house with 2 sisters a mom and only male was my dad even our animals where ALL girls. i now live with my hubby and a male roommate most of my friends are male and come to my home and i can guarantee not a single one of them can ever tell i even have a period but one of the guys new gf has issues that the cabinet under the sink where a GIANT box of random meds are sit next to each other because its not "appropriate for them to be there if the boys go for meds" they have never even gone for meds because im very let me do it when people are in my house. she insisted once and there was an issue for a brand new box being there and they guys where like we dont care they have even offered to get some on if i need them. SHE has an issue and a group of 6 grown men dont.
Boy mom BS, they're so weird about other women being around their precious angels. I'd say the stepmom is just being a flying monkey for her sister and less ss a shamer.
Daughters phone needs a permanent vacation and the kid going on a hunger strike should not get her out cleaning the toilets. Too bad the mom seems to be opposed to properly punishing the kid. Sounds like she needs a couple years in military school.
Apologizing to Ricky and going without horsecamp is the LEAST of the consequences. Should have had to come clean to the manager despite her claims that it's ruin her rep. And the Wife is a an AH and a lousy parent, letting one kid get away with horrifically selfish behavior while making the other child down.
No wonder Ricky has Trust issues. 1: His sister deliberately ruined his reputation b/c of what "her friends would think?" 2: Mom then turns around and supports daughter over her son. I would have cut off the daughter from all electronics for her criminal actions. If she wants a job, she can apply on paper. If she wants friends, she can write letters. If she apologized in person to the manager, I might have considered taking back the no electronics rule, but no way would she be going to that camp. If she didn't apologize, she could hand write every paper for the next school year.
The 16 yr old daughter is a brat and needs punishment and counseling. If this behavior isn't learned from a family member then it is from friends. No more, no more current friends, no more phone, no more cleaning services, no more free time, NO MORE FUN EASY LIFE. She needs to learn what a difficult life is before she is an adult. If she is cruel and tries to frame people when she is an adult and she gets caught it could be jail/prison. This is part of parenting teaching consequence and to be a good person
Yeah I’m a vegetarian, just regular vegetarian not vegan lol, anyway I would never try to force my diet on my husband or anyone else. It’s people like this that has stigmatize vegetarians and vegans. It’s people like this that have made all non-meat eaters be considered generally insufferable. Vegetarianism is not my religion, and it’s certainly not my personality, it’s just in my diet.
Also, if the smell of the meat was bothering him in the living room, he could have carried her plate to the kitchen and left it there for her. It was obviously not old food, and throwing it away was a vindictive move.
It's vegetarians (and sometimes vegans) like you that make me want to make sure there are dishes my friends can eat at gatherings. It's vegans like him that I refuse to associate with. lol
@@TheAuthorgal ... I'm neither a vegetarian nor a vegan, but my granddaughter is a vegan. She never objects if her family eats meat at get-togethers [partly because her mom is careful to ventilate well or serve outdoors], and we always make sure to have yummy dishes also available that she can eat and everyone else enjoys too. Moderation in all things.
Story 1: Hubs is the kind of vegs/vegan that gives vegs/vegans a bad name. Stepping away from a meal doesn't harm this AH's health - and how entitled is it that the Living Room is mutual space where HIS beliefs must be respected, but not OP's? This wasn't a mistake. It was deliberate disrespect. NTA.
Who wants to bet that if OP moved her wedding date, her brother would turn around and steal her venue/caterer/flowers/whatever else she had booked/paid a deposit on?
Thats not a bad thought. Since OP clicked and is perfectly fine with using daughter's icks (real or not, just used as an excuse to bully) to teach her a lesson, a standing punishment type of her being expected to clean the X thing, with varying volume of work, or if something gross is included, depending on severity of a crime, and for her not to get used to it or decide the Y thing, is worth it. Basically draw boundaries for unexceptable behaviors having consequences, daughter hopefully be scared to cross after a few misfirings, cover-ups or rebellions. The important thing is not to go too far or too little, to not have the opposite effect
I'm starting to wonder how many 'vegans' are actually just covering up a hefty case of ARFID. The real vegans/vegetarians that I know (I'm low animal product, by medical necessity, but that's a me issue) don't toss away food, just because it doesn't meet their needs.
Funny enough, while I'm meatfree, my own husband has AFRID. Hes not like this. Basically, it's like the opposite to pica, if I can describe it. He sees the food. He can appreciate its aesthetic appeal and smell. But if its not in the Safe Food group, if he lifts it to his mouth, his brain will instantly go 'don't eat that, its not food!' And he can't eat it. Though there are extreme cases where they have real phobias towards foods outside their 'safe foods'.
@@wmdkitty it was a thought, not an excuse or diagnosis. Kindly take a psychology class, and stop stamping your own variety of 'survivorship' on the rest of the planet. It's not doing you or anyone else any good, and you seem to think that your narrow, cynical - frankly abusive in it's own right - way of dragging the mentally ill (of whom you genuinely seem to have an intense vitrol for) that, based on your own past admissions seems to have some common ground with sociopathic behaviour. You also don't seem to understand the basic concept of mental illness and it's contribution to unacceptable social behaviour (as evidenced by how you behave). A basic level CC will be able to educate you on the paradoxical link between the two, and might (granted that you drop your tendency to scream at every shadow, and don't get kicked out of the class it's self) give you a bit of insight to why your black and white, one dimensional thinking doesn't serve anyone, much less you in the real world.
@@HoneyBakedHamlet I've actually worked with multiple clients in a clinical setting that will throw food away, and who hid behind the labels of 'vegan' and 'clean eating' as a shield. Mental illness shows it's self in interesting ways.
@@wmdkitty I was verbally abusive to my children when they were teens if they pushed me too far and especially if I was already having a bad day!!!!! I did recognize it wasn't proper response and apologized for that, every time. But also, I was completely out of control of what i said or how loud i got once it started!! At the time I did not know I was suffering from PTSD, anxiety and depression among other mental issues. Once I sought help things got better but I'm still going to therapy and sorting meds to be my best. So that doesn't excuse my abuse, but if I hadn't of gotten help it would have continued and I would have hated myself all the more for it. I will know for the rest of my life I yelled when meds and therapy would have stopped it early on if i had known any of the why even an issue. I just knew the kids pushed my buttons until i lost it. IF I had been medicated and only gently at that, I wouldn't have ended up in that state. No excuse, but sometimes things are more complicated than so and so is just an ass or a bish I love my children with everything I am, but during that time I needed medication and therapy only I didn't know it. Maybe so and so wouldn't be like that if medication and/or therapy is needed. Their behavior is abusive, but they are not an abusive person at heart, and generally feel out of control, literally cannot stop, but no clue why, other than IF they hadn't of refused to take the trash out or whatever, I wouldn't have yelled...which is the truth, BUT medicated I don't yell and wouldn't have then. IMO both men were being AH mostly for control issues.
As a meatfree person myself, I'm angry at this person for throwing away someone else's dinner. Dude was just being a prick because she was eating something he didn't like. Why the hell would he assume she served herself something that's rotting? No, he was clutching at straws. I hate pumpkin. Refuse to eat it. But like hell I'd throw away someone else's dinner because there's pumpkin on their plate. Edit: I'm fully aware that human beings are omnivorous and my preferences are my own. I believe it's very important for children to consume for their growth and development, and I insist on my own children eat it a few times a week. If they choose to become meatfree as adults, its completely up to them.
I 100% agree with this. I am a girl who loves her steak but my mother in law can't consume any meat products because it makes her violently ill. She would never do this to me, my fiance or his dad. When ever we visit for Christmas or Thanksgiving or just to hang out we always make sure she has enough to eat before we make our food. It's just common courtesy to make sure everyone in the house has enough to eat. Especially your significant other. And DONT ever throw away food until you consult the person who made it.
EVEN IF IT DID SMELL OR HE CAN'T LOOK AT IT, ALL LIES BECAUSE HE RESIDES IN THE HOME, BUT HE SHOULD HAVE EITHER STUCK IT IN THE MICROWAVE, OVEN OR FRIDGE. HE IS TA
There are vegans who don't accept the argument of using the carcass so "the animal didn't die for nothing" for the same reason they wouldn't accept argument about using a human carcass so "the person didn't die for nothing". This comes from the philosophy of animal personhood and it's an internally consistent logic, whether one agrees with the premise or not. Who knows, the BF might follow that philosophy, but then he shouldn't be with an omnivore.
9:55 My brother pulled the same crap on my sister. He notified the family that he was getting married on her wedding day as his GF was pregnant. When sis said it was her wedding day and to reschedule would cost her $35,000 he told her to f off. When the family sided with him my sister's fiancee told them that if they did this they had better plan on a funeral too. He then pulled out his laptop and went online. When my parents asked what he was doing he said they forgot he owned a billboard advertizing company. He the reprogramed 10 bilboards to inform the public what was happening and what my brother was doing. The kicker was that one of these bilboards was 30 x 40 ft and right next to the parking lot of the church where her father was the Pastor. The fallout was epic. My sister got her wedding on her day and my brother was forced to get married at the courthouse as no preacher in town would marry my brother.
The affair may've started when 'Mike' got drunk - BTW, did Penny tied him down and funnel the booze into him to get him 'cr@p faced?'- but Mike chose Penny and partying and booze rather than sobriety. Could have hit AA, could have entered a program, but he didn't. And NTA for responding with the truth about Penny's looks. Mike denigrated his Ex's looks to justify his bad choices - the only way OP would be out of line is if Penny wasn't loud, obnoxious, etc., etc.
Follows her own advice and feels entitled to dictate everyone else does as well in their own house, raising a replacement for that BIL who expected OP to put used pad in her purse (she also went lenghts to wrap it up so nothing could be seen), while boys in question probably jack off in that girl's shower. That or aunt on the type of birth control that stops periods and gambles with biochemistry and side-effects. Not saying it is but one of which might be why she's gone so irrationally doolaly
The vegan, nta. She is literally asking for a heads up and is angry that she wasn't told about it. She reassured her daughter that she wasn't mad at her and her eating meat is not the problem.
Nta. Your daughter needed to be taught a lesson. However your wife needs own up to what her daughter is becoming. Saying it is the person she is around just gives an excuse. There is no excuse.
My stepdad had quadruple bypass surgery scheduled for a Monday, my mom asked if I'd been having any signs of labor Sunday night. Well, by the time my mom got home from the hospital (different towns) she got called that she was a grandma again.
When my oldest started having periods, her little brother was concerned. Mind you, my 12 yr old is very Nero spicy and refers to her period as her murder or Jason depending g on her mood, lol. Anyway, my son was curious, so we explained what they are and why girls have them very clinical and science-based ( his preferred learning style, he is also nero spicy). After all that, he hugged his sister. Told her he would try his best to bug her on these days. Then he asked why I didn't have the periods, so that was when he got to learn how having him nearly killed us both durring labor. Which resulted in me having an emergency hysterectomy . He was supper sweet and gave me big hugs. He asked if I ever was sad about not being able to have more babies. I told him not as sad as I would have been if I had lost him. My boy is 7, and he clung so hard to me and cried about how he is glad I'm okay too. My daughter gave us both a hug and then started cracking jokes ( to defuse the feelings) Our job as parents is to prepare our children for the world, and this includes the harder topics, the ones that make us all just a bit uncomfortable. If we don't, they will get it some place else.
First story: if the living room is a shared space, then OP is allowed to have meat there too. If he has a problem with meat being in the shared space, then he needs to leave. This sounds like a horrible person to live with. Uncompromising, manipulative, and a gaslighter. "The meat smells bad." "I thought the dinner was old." You can tell when a meal has been eaten or not, he threw it away knowing she hasn't touched it yet. and the excuses were just that, excuses.
@@kennethsjvold9212 are you stupid? Did I say whatever she wants? But eating normal human food in a place that you should be able to eat food? That's too much to ask? Idiot
@@kennethsjvold9212 She never said the husband couldn't eat there? So why is he allowed to decide on his own where she can eat her meal. You don't touch other peoples food, it is a fundamental rule I feel. And if he has such a bad adversion to meat he should be reluctant to even touch it. He is just being a bag of dicks to be honest.
I know several people who tried vegan or vegetarian and after 6 months with nutritionists were told to start eating some meat because their hair was falling out their nails were brittle and they were in bad shape. People can be vegan but they have to understand it's not the same for everyone.
The clothing documentation one reminds me of something my mom told me! She was a huge 80's brat. The crazy hair, expensive everything. She kept a calender in her closet where she would document her outfits, specifically so she would not wear the same pants twice in one month, or the same shirt twice in 2 months. She's so chill now it's really funny to imagine her doing that. Popular people really put in the hours
That's crazy! In middle school I wrote the same pants/shit combo three times a week. The height of facebook was in twenties and i went to great lengths to never be photographed wearing the same thing twice.
I can’t say I blame the manager for not wanting to hire the son after all the drama with the daughter. I bet he was like “I’d be happier if none of y’all ever brought your family dysfunction back in my shop, thanks.”
I would still make daughter apologize, and grovel even after he says no, to discourage low effort, or lies. Would not have said you have to appologize and will deffinitely NOT get my money to go to the fancy camp in the order he had. Now daughter can just cling to her anger and 'betrayal' forever, discarding shame, and get some of the people to pity her, without having to go through even more punishment. Its not the same situation morally, but same thinking how some kids who are constantly being wrongly accused, suspected, harassed and punished for something they did not do, just decide to do the thing because parents insist on giving them the consequences anyway. Like sex, drinking, drugs, bad behaviour, sneaking out, stealing, being disrespectful etc
Re OP nearing labor and delivery: He says that you're taking everything from him........BABIES take everything from BOTH parents, and also GIVE everything. They take sleep from you, until they start sleeping through the night. They take funds that you may have wanted to spend at salons or on fancy vacations. They take energy from you when they make messes, have tantrums and stop napping during the days. If your mate is sulking over having to postpone one joy trip when you're so close to labor and delivery, I would question his readiness to be a parent and equal partner in the relationship. He needs to hear that and that there will be other opportunities for vacations, and that he's being an immature, little AH for trying to guilt you into saying it's okay w/ you if he goes on a trip at the time when you and the baby need him most. Even if you don't deliver for another 2-3 weeks, and knew that that was the schedule, he would be the AH for not hearing that you need him to stay with you to make you feel secure.
I’m autistic and the comment at at 1:11:18 sounds about right! I remember hearing the story and just thinking, damn, I fully understand the logic and can see why they’d want to know how acceptable things are societally, because I have issues understanding what is/isn’t okay at times and it sounds fun and practical. Honestly does sound lowkey like something I’d do. Albeit I’d probably try figuring out the most socially acceptable way to end conversations and how to know when doing so is appropriate…
Oh heck all I could think was that if any of them went missing she could be a great resource for the cops. Knew exactly what they were wearing last and if she hadn't seen them she could probably predict it at least and maybe have other random info.
Don't gloss over the mom saying to "go easy on her." The dad is the only place she gets any consequences. The mom enables her. She got the balls to act up in the house from SOMEWHERE. The mom doesn't think this is important. The mom isn't insulting anyone overtly, but she holds the same attitudes as her daughter and it's really dumb to only blame her mean girl friends.
truth her daughter literally framed the house cleaner. thats a serious crime and shes a damn criminal. i would have given the phone to the house cleaner as an apology and set the daughter in a program to have to clean things. shes a germaphobe then she needs some gloves and set her loose.
For the story about ab*se and divorce. OP does not look like a fool. Ab*se, especially emotional and psychological, builds slowly over time. It took me years to realize just how manipulative my ex really was. It took an argument that ended in ass*ult and the police being called for me to see everything clearly. The divorce was ugly, with restraint orders, repeated vandalism, and some seriously messed up manipulations. It was hard, the scariest thing I've ever done. I had to face serious childhood PTSD triggers. But my family was so supportive, especially my mother. I could never have gotten through it without her. Life isn't perfect, but I am standing on my own two feet and I am free. It was so worth it.
Yeah! It was PERFECT! They kept 100% of the mocking on the statement. The only reason the nephew felt they were mocking him, was because HE was the one who made rhat SUPER homophobic statement.
The story with the wedding, just count how many people are not going to attend and go at some shelter for old people and invite them or bring them all the extra food, like that nothing goes to waste and the marriage starts with the blessings of the people who are less fortunate.
How is penny an upgrade? An upgrade for what? The clap? Someone who drags a recovered addict back into their addiction isn’t what I would be happy for either and honestly I would let them know, kids involved or not. I wouldn’t shit on the kids, kids can’t choose their parents, but I wouldn’t be discreet about how I feel about the woman.
The "I don't know" story is actually the mother's problem. OP is a CHILD and thus is still trying to learn how to communicate and followup. OP's mother sounds like a narcissist and TOXIC AF. All SHE needed to do is call the school and band coach directly and determine what the heck is going on. By getting all bent out of shape and using guilt tripping and throwing a fucking tantrum, she shows OP exactly how conditional her love is. Poor OP think they are the asshole. Not in this case. OP didn't mean to be mean, they simply were CONFUSED. WTF? Poor kiddo has been brow beaten so badly their entire life that they think anything they do wrong means that they are a horrible person. That is so sad.
Yeah, OP's mom sounds just like mine. I hope OP does what I didn't have the courage to do: go no contact ASAP! Move out the minute you're able and never call or look back. That mother needs to get into therapy.
And she messaged the younger child all kinds of abuse and guilt trippy messages because she was throwing a tantrum about not being invited to a random ass event???? Like, tf lmfao
Story 1: He's a hypocrite. A HUGE ONE. Boo hoo. He's being a baby and if the food was made and plated six minutes ago, it would've been WARM. He just used that as an excuse to be petty and he thought his actions would've had no consequences because of his diet. Smh. I would evaluate our relationship after this manipulative attempt and high tail it out.
With the OP with the mean girl daughter, I think OP should give her a choice on her punishment. Like either she sleeps outside or volunteers at a homeless shelter for every weekend for x weeks etc. The maid definitely should not have to clean the daughter's space anymore
The uncle’s response to his nephew’s clumsy homophobic remarks was hilarious. I kinda want to do that ranking now with my family, just to see some older couples go at it. “Oh that’s BULLSHIT Carol, you eat clams, that’s a another “male” point on your chart!” 🤣
Honestly: It was the best answer to that remark. It was no bullying or ganging up: They made it a game to enjoy for everyone and included his verdict in it without making fun of him or his sexuality as well. Someone needs to explain to the Nephew that he can not cry ganging up on him when people make out of a stupid remark of his a fun game everyone can enjoy. He made himself the fool and instead of realizing he had and enjoying the game with them: He sulked. Which shows he is still a child and shouldn't expect adults to take his verdict of other people too seriously when it is about something this personal. He ain't ever gonna be judge or jury ever again of this fun list and never in serious. He was trying to bully them and it backfired in a non agressive way. Marvelous
When my now 21 year old twins were in 5th grade they had a horrible teacher. This teacher yelled, screamed, would kick the trash can. My son is autistic and if you don't know with autistic people even though they're not the focus of the yelling they still process it as if they're the ones being yelled at. This teacher was so horrible thit's horrible that my son's Psychiatrist pulled him out of school for 8 weeks and the school district had to send a teacher to my home every day. This teacher was so bad that if a student was sitting and they dropped a pencil they were not allowed to bend down and pick it up because the "movement distracted her." Us parents final straw was when one child dropped his pencil and bent down to pick it up up. She became so enraged that she went to his desk picked up his spiral notebook and slammed it on his desk not realizing that His hand was in the way and she ended up hitting his finger and cutting him. After that I got all 20 parents together we went to the school board and demanded that she be fired. Guess what they fired her. Yes I yes I believe that parents should support teachers, however an abusive teacher need not be teaching children.
The one with the dead and alive child I would have said if I was op "Why should I care about your child when you treat my child like shit for being alive?"
Ngl. If my bf threw away my food, and made a fuss about 'community space', I'd burst into tears, throw a fit that he wants to kill me, lock myself in my room, and waaaaaay over react. He wants to go petty, I will show him petty. Granted, the relationship would already be over by then, so it would just be the long game of making him leave first, but yeah.
Infant death story: Instead of a memorial on the infant's death, why can't OP's family celebrate the deceased child on its actual birth date? That way, OP's child would have her birthday to herself.
I have a dead child. We NEVER celebrate her death. We celebrate her life. We celebrate her birthday and the light she brought to our lives. I understand when your child is born "sleeping" or stillborn you might only have the one day to celebrate a remembrance. That isn't the case with that family though. I definitely feel that the sister in law wanted it needed to be the center of attention in many ways. Child loss is devastating. I have so much empathy. We don't get to take the life and joy away from others because we have loss and pain though. And we shouldn't want to. I can't imagine expecting a family not to celebrate their own child because I lost mine....
Because that mom is a prick. Remember her gloating that she 'beat' OP by giving birth to the first grandchild? In the perverted way she's still competing, by not letting family give attention to the surviving baby, and 'winning' by taking away birthdays, and possibly future milestones. If given an inch, bets are she would try to make parents in law force OP to change birthday permanently or side that its disrespectful to celebrate on the anniversary of someone's death, so it be very glum, small scale or cancelled until that kid leaves home and prays their new family, friend group would make separate arrangements
Like I tell my wife she has alot of attitude for someone who's so ticklish. Wish she would try to punish me😂 throwing away food is a no no for me though. I think the starving kids in Africa is ingrained in my being because I don't waste food unless it's actually rotten
Hire someone "disruptive" to go to the brothers wedding. When it gets out, make a big deal saying "I'm glad I wasn't there, anyway wanna see the pictures from my wedding?"
The story about nephew's father not wanting son to spend time with cousins. Claimed it wasn't Uncle's (his brother) to tell nephew the truth and undermine dad. It became Uncle's place because you made him part of the story when you threw him under the bus and made your son believe he was no longer welcome in his uncle's house. You didn't want to take responsibility for your kid's feelings.
Number one on the list of things you never say around a kid you have with your ex: "my time with your mother was a mistake" or anything of similar meaning. Cause what you tell the kid, even if you don't mean it, is that you don't want them.
Stupid teenage nephew can be as salty as he wants, he got off extremely light. If he said that to a stranger getting made fun of for being stupid would be the least of his worries.
The parents of the child that died should absolutely take that day for themselves for as many times as they need, but should not expect everyone to come. I say this as someone who had a child die. We still celebrate him on his birthday every year but just remember him and take any time we need on his death date. It's a horrific thing to go through and having empathy is important as that level of grief and immeasurable pain can make people act irrationally, but it is still okay to have boundaries and celebrate people who are alive.
The daughter story. I'd have reached out to my local police about having her in the cells for a night. Explain she is starting to perform fraud acts and pin theft crimes on others, which I believe is illegal. If the cops would comply, have a false arrest happen with the maid reporting it. I'd also post it on her social media what she did so everyone can see what type of kid she is. HARDCORE life long consequences, as this has been an escalating pattern over a prolonged time and she hasn't changed.
Omg, the story at around 50 min with the baby that passed on the same day the sibling's baby was born! -There was a story similar to it where a couple had twins. One passed away while the other survived. Every year they would have a celebration to remember the baby that passed. Like a death-day instead of a birthday. They would visit the grave every time and make the entire day about the deceased twin and not the living twin. OP, the living twin, hated that his bday was never celebrated and any time he brought up wanting to have a bday party or cake or anything like that, his parents would say he was disrespecting his twin that passed! I think OP's friends threw a small surprise party at another friend's house or something, his parents saw the gifts, and blew up at him for celebrating the day his twin died. It was so maddening, but apparently it can happen. I bet if they had given in in this story, the parents of the deceased baby would insist the other baby never celebrate their bday on that day, not just stop at their 1rst year.
Op let your family know they agreed to save the date of your wedding and if they aren’t there you will know how much their word I’d worth! Or worthless as the case may be! Cut the dead weight from your life and move forward knowing there will be less to hold you down! Congrats on your bright future!
omg lol. the outfit one. as soon as they mentioned doing it to know how often it’s okay to repeat outfits, i was like “autism.” that is TOTALLY something a neurodivergent person would do, plus OP not seeing why it’s considered “weird” and just seeing it as a fun way to collect data and enjoying the routine of it. the whole post screams neurodivergent, i love it!😂
omg the wife/sister pregnancy one... no way would I have been traveling over an hour from my hospital that close to delivery. my docs told me that I should stay within half an hour of the hospitals they deliver through... and I was having no big worries about being allowed to labor.
The OP whose daughter falsely accused the maid of theft: being forced to spend the night in the dirt and germs isn’t likely to acclimate her to dirt and germs. It’s more likely to reinforce the phobia. I would ground her from the friends who seem to have influenced this bad behavior; in fact I’d make that an indefinite thing. I’d also consider counseling because it appears she has some pretty extreme behavior issues if she literally put herself in the hospital the last time she was grounded, and clearly also lacks empathy for others.
As a woman with autism, I understand exactly why a girl would start tracking such data and then continue keeping the record beyond meeting the original goal. We struggle with unwritten social rules like what to wear and when. Tracking what others do helps us learn those rules. We are also creatures of habit and tend to like collecting esoteric data. Train spotting is a great example of this. Personally, I keep a record of every movie, show and book that I watch/read and religiously add additional notes etc As for the idea that she hadn’t told her friends because she knew it was something that would be viewed negatively. Nup. Probably not the case. I doubt that she ever gave it an active thought. At worst, she may have subconsciously been aware that it was unusual and feared other people’s judgment.
I found her story adorable! Idk why but I'd love to go over her findings and I would take her intentions at face value because she seems so wholesome and honest about why she wanted to study people. I would probably join in and have her keep me posted lol
The wedding story is very telling, OP is being shown by her family how little they think of her. I’ve been no contact with my biological family for some time now, lots of abuse growing up as a kid and as a young adult, featuring physical violence, homophobia, sexism, hardcore ableism, a mother aware my brother was beating me, a mother who didn’t want to parent and forced me to bring up my brother when I was a child myself, and much, much more. When I cut them from my life they only ever contacted me to send abuse, they went straight for some hardcore ableism and threats, I blasted them on social media showing folk EXACTLY who they are and it massively backfired against them, because they couldn’t hide from the horrible stuff they were saying, and I cut all ties and haven’t bothered with them since. OP is in this sort of situation where her family is telling her how little they think of her, how little they prioritise her, and how little they care about her and are trying to bully her into submission so she’ll what they want as they dote on their favourite child, and honestly she should uninvite the lot of them. They don’t deserve to be there at her wedding, her parents especially for supporting her brothers very obvious manipulative behaviour.
OP, you need to get very harsh with your wife even to the point of divorce. She is encouraging your daughter to become a horrible heap of steaming crap narcissist. Stop it now, even if you it cause you to get divorced
I dont have kids but I would have said, "run away if you think getting your home shower electricity phone and food all paid for is so abusive because if you run away you'll have to pay for all of those things yourself. Youre still going to face the coffee shop owner even if i have to drag you in the car and set the safety locks!"
I hate the period locked bathroom story. My grandmother told me I could throw my pads in my uncle's bathroom garbage while I was there for 2 months because of my cousins. Mind you our families had lived with each other on and off depending on how my mom or her brother was doing financially so my cousins had certainly been in bathrooms where girls threw their used pads in the garbage. The solution was make me carrying my used pads through the house and to the kitchen to throw away in a garbage with a lid which was embarrassing for me at 14 but I did being in my uncle's place. Also I remember once my cousin stopped to ask me what it was on my way to the kitchen. I still dont understand the point of a bathroom garbage if it cant be used.
For the OP that tracks the clothing of their friends I get a HUGE ASD/ADHD vibe. Especially because the data was to inform their own clothing choices to appear normal or socially acceptable
I'm fine with making her camp in the yard for a night but you really need to take that iPhone away from her also since she's willing to give it away to the maid anyways
October wedding - pregnant bride should run away fast her husband to be (OPs brother) has shown her what sort of husband/ father he is going to be. She deserves better. Husband spends wife bonus- OP should tell his family that he spent thousands on the stuff. Doubt any of them would agree with what he did. Zoom class - when my son work from home at the beginning of the day he would let his father and me know when he would be having meetings so that we wouldn't make a noise or enter his room. Communication and respecting people's boundaries is important.
You know I get parents want them to get married but the parents should have said no when he picked that day. The parents, Tim and the gf knew OP's wedding was that day
Never sign up to be the villain in any scenario that you aren't the actual villain of. That's the path towards madness and not one to be taken unless you enjoy being a doormat. You can't force bonds that others are unwilling to make, no matter how much you wish otherwise. If you try to make it happen, other people are going to pop popcorn, grab a drink, sit in a comfy chair, and just watch the fireworks illuminate the area.
Just wondering if anyone heard "the common area" part I've been married almost 41 yrs our entire house is common area. OK folks has marriage become like being a rm mate, I'm so confused
The friend that keeps data of her friends' outfits is not an AH in my opinion. I would honestly find it adorable if I found someone studying people's habits like that and everything just for analysis' sake. I'd love seeing their findings lol. I forget about what people have told me even though I care very much so I've thought of taking notes on people just to remember things. But yeah it's adorable I'd honestly be friends with that person lol
37:38 I mean OP found a way to deal with nephew acting like an ass, and suddenly nephew is a vulnerable child who the mean adults ganged up on. OP didn’t even bully nephew, they almost bullied themselves? OPs solution is hilarious and great.
If I were OP, I would stop arguing about it, dobt give her brother attention and just enjoy her wedding, no matter who attended. Hes upset that he wasn't invited and decided to be petty just to spark some kind of argument while accusing her of wanting to get married first. He wants that, don't give it to him.
The one with the husband spent thousands. His family will soon be tired of him. They won't want a grown man staying for free at their home for long. They will soon figure out why you left. He had it good. He didn't work and he didn't really want to.
I have one very important question. Where the AH husband spent her bonus did she take every thing he purchased back for refund or just sell. NEED TO KNOW, PLEASE!
re relatives wanting to cancel OP's daughter's birthday to commemorate (celebrate) untimely death of OP's neice: So, SIL and brother want to do a Good Friday thing every year? That's what Day of the Dead is for- to honor those who have passed, especially those who have passed in the last year. The altar can be as elaborate as desired, with whatever messages the attendees wish.
The story with the maid is either a copy from someone else, or the OP erased parts of the original. He fired the maid on the spot, told her to get her things and “get out now”, and didn’t bother to watch the video until the next day!! They tore his ass up in the comments.
I feel like with the vegan thing: yes, you DO need to know if your vegan child now has meat. this can cause some issues digestively. a parent SHOULD KNOW these things. it's not controlling, it's a medical thing. My friends who are vegan will sometimes get sick because their bodies aren't used to it.
"breaking up over a computer" this is what so many people don't get. it's not about the _thing_ at the center of the last straw. it is about why that happened. hubby was a controlling gaslighting dirtbag, that could very easily progress into abuse.
"Eyes got tired from working and wanted to watch tv" yeah as someone who wears glasses and who's eye sight is slowly getting worse, thats one thing optometrists DO NOT RECOMMEND!!! if your eyes are tired from staring at a screen, you dont go look at another. You take a break and look at something in the distance (trees or something) or close your eyes with a warm clother over the lids to relax your eyes. This line alone makes me believe the husband is full of crap.
I remember always having a lot of cuts on my hands and my dad yelling at me to do the dishes bc "the fucking soap water will clean it just do the dam dishes" I did it and he's right it built character
your brother just lost you to be ashamed of themselves for thinking that life stopped just because they lost their little bundle of joy and they're trying to stop you from enjoying your child screw them they're being self-centered I get that they lost a little one but Life goes on
The one with the Brother lying about op to his 14 year old. They said the ‘it’s not your place’ struck a cord in them as a parent. So if the op ever sees this comment; it was not your place until your brother used YOUR name and slandered it to your nephew. Your brother MADE it so that you were involved which means he can no longer claim you had no place to interfere. Once the father himself involved you, an uninvolved party, into the argument you now have Carte Blanche to involve yourself as much as you want. Go ham fam.
Mocking my nephew: NTA. He was being intentionally obnoxious and a little jerk. OP just found a way to set him straight (no pun intended) and show him what an ass he was being, without giving him more ammunition. The other adults felt OP was right and handling the situation the right way, so they followed suit. They didn't "gang up on him". Nobody turned on him and went off. They showed him how absurd and wrong he was, and hopefully taught him a valuable lesson in manners and how to treat others.
“Since your injured hand threw away my food, your injured hand can do dishes”. 😂
@@mkat8505 that would have been my very question ⁉️
Lmfaoo
@@mkat8505 because he secretly craves meat... he is only being vegan to bug OP (although I'll bet he is deluded enough to believe he is sincere...)
Personally I don't see an injured hand as an excuse. I washed dishes with a cast on my hand/forearm. Sure I wrapped myself in plastic foil first, but I still did the dishes. (Mom wasn't home, night shift, and we didn't have a dishwasher and I wanted to help out)
@@lina9535Did you use the casted arm to hold the dishes or to do the scrubbing? I know it’s a random question, but I’m genuinely curious.
OP's father was a total AH for disrespecting his dead wife's memory in front of his daughter. Amanda (Dad's mistress) escalated the conflict by following and harassing her. OP showed incredible restraint and class.
The divorce for a computer.
She should just say to the friends who say "How she would feel if"
"How would you feel if you earned all the money, did all the household stuff, earned a bonus by working really hard and your husband took every penny and told you, that he would ALLOW you to replace your old worn shoes when you earn more money, whilst he does nothing"
Period story: i find it so ironic that the people with the problem with OPs daughters period are other *women* in her life, while the only person defending her is a man. It’s just funny that society expects men to find periods disgusting, but it’s the women making their sons like that.
Exactly, happens far too often, never understood why women are so happy to be sexist against women like that. Period positivity would be so much easier to achieve if these women weren’t teaching their sons to be grossed out by a completely natural bodily function women live with.
@@ZombieSazza Or worse, teach their daughters to be disgusted by their own periods.
Male misogynists suck and female misogynists really suck.
It's way past time to end the disrespect toward menstruation.
Really good mothers -- and really good fathers-- of sons would never teach them to be disgusted by a woman's menstrual periods, they would teach their sons to know the difference between menstrual pads, tampons, menstrual sponges, menstrual cups, and menstrual discs and then be supportive of the women and daughters in their lives because those women and those daughters will certainly have menstrual periods.
Really good mothers -- and really good fathers -- of daughters would also never teach them to be disgusted by their own menstrual periods, they would teach their daughters to know the difference between menstrual pads, tampons, menstrual sponges, menstrual cups, and menstrual discs and then teach them how to not accept any period-shaming from anybody in their lives, including their family members and the men and sons in their lives.
I grew up with male family members understanding periods are normal and some times i forgot to wrap up a pad when I first started having them and just gave me small reminders that "hey, we don't care about it but just remember to wrap them up" and I started reminding myself to wrap up the pads...fast forward to dating and the first guy I dated in highschool was SO disgusted by the thought of me going "hey, i am on my period so I just want to lay in bed" that his mother went on a tirade at me for "disgusting her baby boy"....i dumped him right there on the spot and walked away.
I've learned that men are only disgusted by periods by the woman who raised them...most men i know are cool with periods because their dad and mom made them know its normal.
I grew up in a house with 2 sisters a mom and only male was my dad even our animals where ALL girls. i now live with my hubby and a male roommate most of my friends are male and come to my home and i can guarantee not a single one of them can ever tell i even have a period but one of the guys new gf has issues that the cabinet under the sink where a GIANT box of random meds are sit next to each other because its not "appropriate for them to be there if the boys go for meds" they have never even gone for meds because im very let me do it when people are in my house. she insisted once and there was an issue for a brand new box being there and they guys where like we dont care they have even offered to get some on if i need them. SHE has an issue and a group of 6 grown men dont.
Boy mom BS, they're so weird about other women being around their precious angels. I'd say the stepmom is just being a flying monkey for her sister and less ss a shamer.
Maid needs to quit, call police & charge daughter. Show her some REAL CONSEQUENCES.
She at the least should refuse to do ANY cleaning for the daughter - no cleaning her bathroom (if she has one), picking up or washing her clothes etc.
Daughters phone needs a permanent vacation and the kid going on a hunger strike should not get her out cleaning the toilets. Too bad the mom seems to be opposed to properly punishing the kid. Sounds like she needs a couple years in military school.
Apologizing to Ricky and going without horsecamp is the LEAST of the consequences. Should have had to come clean to the manager despite her claims that it's ruin her rep. And the Wife is a an AH and a lousy parent, letting one kid get away with horrifically selfish behavior while making the other child down.
lol nope
No wonder Ricky has Trust issues. 1: His sister deliberately ruined his reputation b/c of what "her friends would think?" 2: Mom then turns around and supports daughter over her son. I would have cut off the daughter from all electronics for her criminal actions. If she wants a job, she can apply on paper. If she wants friends, she can write letters. If she apologized in person to the manager, I might have considered taking back the no electronics rule, but no way would she be going to that camp. If she didn't apologize, she could hand write every paper for the next school year.
Teenagers are old enough to understand hate speech and as such are old enough to be mocked for using it. Bravo to OP
Story 2: This girl needs therapy and enforced boundaries ASAP. Her behavior is so far from normal, it's concerning.
The 16 yr old daughter is a brat and needs punishment and counseling. If this behavior isn't learned from a family member then it is from friends. No more, no more current friends, no more phone, no more cleaning services, no more free time, NO MORE FUN EASY LIFE. She needs to learn what a difficult life is before she is an adult. If she is cruel and tries to frame people when she is an adult and she gets caught it could be jail/prison. This is part of parenting teaching consequence and to be a good person
lol nah i hope maid gets set on fire!
Yeah I’m a vegetarian, just regular vegetarian not vegan lol, anyway I would never try to force my diet on my husband or anyone else. It’s people like this that has stigmatize vegetarians and vegans. It’s people like this that have made all non-meat eaters be considered generally insufferable. Vegetarianism is not my religion, and it’s certainly not my personality, it’s just in my diet.
Exactly some try to use it to make themselves feel special and superior.
Also, if the smell of the meat was bothering him in the living room, he could have carried her plate to the kitchen and left it there for her. It was obviously not old food, and throwing it away was a vindictive move.
It's vegetarians (and sometimes vegans) like you that make me want to make sure there are dishes my friends can eat at gatherings. It's vegans like him that I refuse to associate with. lol
@@TheAuthorgal ... I'm neither a vegetarian nor a vegan, but my granddaughter is a vegan. She never objects if her family eats meat at get-togethers [partly because her mom is careful to ventilate well or serve outdoors], and we always make sure to have yummy dishes also available that she can eat and everyone else enjoys too. Moderation in all things.
Yeah,he went way beyond with his whole fake ass "muh rotting meat" what a baby
Story 1: Hubs is the kind of vegs/vegan that gives vegs/vegans a bad name. Stepping away from a meal doesn't harm this AH's health - and how entitled is it that the Living Room is mutual space where HIS beliefs must be respected, but not OP's? This wasn't a mistake. It was deliberate disrespect. NTA.
Who wants to bet that if OP moved her wedding date, her brother would turn around and steal her venue/caterer/flowers/whatever else she had booked/paid a deposit on?
exactly what I thought... "well since you're moving the date, why not give these to brother"
Oooo. Thats such a good point
Maybe the daughter should be cleaning the toilet. The daughter also tried to frame the maid.
Thats not a bad thought. Since OP clicked and is perfectly fine with using daughter's icks (real or not, just used as an excuse to bully) to teach her a lesson, a standing punishment type of her being expected to clean the X thing, with varying volume of work, or if something gross is included, depending on severity of a crime, and for her not to get used to it or decide the Y thing, is worth it. Basically draw boundaries for unexceptable behaviors having consequences, daughter hopefully be scared to cross after a few misfirings, cover-ups or rebellions. The important thing is not to go too far or too little, to not have the opposite effect
I'm starting to wonder how many 'vegans' are actually just covering up a hefty case of ARFID. The real vegans/vegetarians that I know (I'm low animal product, by medical necessity, but that's a me issue) don't toss away food, just because it doesn't meet their needs.
Nah, he sounds like he's just a controlling ashbowl. Please stop making excuses for abusive behavior.
Funny enough, while I'm meatfree, my own husband has AFRID. Hes not like this.
Basically, it's like the opposite to pica, if I can describe it.
He sees the food. He can appreciate its aesthetic appeal and smell.
But if its not in the Safe Food group, if he lifts it to his mouth, his brain will instantly go 'don't eat that, its not food!'
And he can't eat it.
Though there are extreme cases where they have real phobias towards foods outside their 'safe foods'.
@@wmdkitty it was a thought, not an excuse or diagnosis. Kindly take a psychology class, and stop stamping your own variety of 'survivorship' on the rest of the planet. It's not doing you or anyone else any good, and you seem to think that your narrow, cynical - frankly abusive in it's own right - way of dragging the mentally ill (of whom you genuinely seem to have an intense vitrol for) that, based on your own past admissions seems to have some common ground with sociopathic behaviour. You also don't seem to understand the basic concept of mental illness and it's contribution to unacceptable social behaviour (as evidenced by how you behave). A basic level CC will be able to educate you on the paradoxical link between the two, and might (granted that you drop your tendency to scream at every shadow, and don't get kicked out of the class it's self) give you a bit of insight to why your black and white, one dimensional thinking doesn't serve anyone, much less you in the real world.
@@HoneyBakedHamlet I've actually worked with multiple clients in a clinical setting that will throw food away, and who hid behind the labels of 'vegan' and 'clean eating' as a shield. Mental illness shows it's self in interesting ways.
@@wmdkitty I was verbally abusive to my children when they were teens if they pushed me too far and especially if I was already having a bad day!!!!! I did recognize it wasn't proper response and apologized for that, every time. But also, I was completely out of control of what i said or how loud i got once it started!!
At the time I did not know I was suffering from PTSD, anxiety and depression among other mental issues. Once I sought help things got better but I'm still going to therapy and sorting meds to be my best.
So that doesn't excuse my abuse, but if I hadn't of gotten help it would have continued and I would have hated myself all the more for it. I will know for the rest of my life I yelled when meds and therapy would have stopped it early on if i had known any of the why even an issue. I just knew the kids pushed my buttons until i lost it. IF I had been medicated and only gently at that, I wouldn't have ended up in that state. No excuse, but sometimes things are more complicated than so and so is just an ass or a bish
I love my children with everything I am, but during that time I needed medication and therapy only I didn't know it. Maybe so and so wouldn't be like that if medication and/or therapy is needed. Their behavior is abusive, but they are not an abusive person at heart, and generally feel out of control, literally cannot stop, but no clue why, other than IF they hadn't of refused to take the trash out or whatever, I wouldn't have yelled...which is the truth, BUT medicated I don't yell and wouldn't have then.
IMO both men were being AH mostly for control issues.
As a meatfree person myself, I'm angry at this person for throwing away someone else's dinner.
Dude was just being a prick because she was eating something he didn't like.
Why the hell would he assume she served herself something that's rotting? No, he was clutching at straws.
I hate pumpkin. Refuse to eat it. But like hell I'd throw away someone else's dinner because there's pumpkin on their plate.
Edit: I'm fully aware that human beings are omnivorous and my preferences are my own. I believe it's very important for children to consume for their growth and development, and I insist on my own children eat it a few times a week. If they choose to become meatfree as adults, its completely up to them.
I 100% agree with this. I am a girl who loves her steak but my mother in law can't consume any meat products because it makes her violently ill. She would never do this to me, my fiance or his dad. When ever we visit for Christmas or Thanksgiving or just to hang out we always make sure she has enough to eat before we make our food. It's just common courtesy to make sure everyone in the house has enough to eat. Especially your significant other. And DONT ever throw away food until you consult the person who made it.
EVEN IF IT DID SMELL OR HE CAN'T LOOK AT IT, ALL LIES BECAUSE HE RESIDES IN THE HOME, BUT HE SHOULD HAVE EITHER STUCK IT IN THE MICROWAVE, OVEN OR FRIDGE.
HE IS TA
There are vegans who don't accept the argument of using the carcass so "the animal didn't die for nothing" for the same reason they wouldn't accept argument about using a human carcass so "the person didn't die for nothing". This comes from the philosophy of animal personhood and it's an internally consistent logic, whether one agrees with the premise or not. Who knows, the BF might follow that philosophy, but then he shouldn't be with an omnivore.
@@wwondertwin
your point makes sense to me. 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
Hubby could have put the plate in the kitchen
9:55 My brother pulled the same crap on my sister. He notified the family that he was getting married on her wedding day as his GF was pregnant. When sis said it was her wedding day and to reschedule would cost her $35,000 he told her to f off. When the family sided with him my sister's fiancee told them that if they did this they had better plan on a funeral too. He then pulled out his laptop and went online. When my parents asked what he was doing he said they forgot he owned a billboard advertizing company. He the reprogramed 10 bilboards to inform the public what was happening and what my brother was doing. The kicker was that one of these bilboards was 30 x 40 ft and right next to the parking lot of the church where her father was the Pastor. The fallout was epic. My sister got her wedding on her day and my brother was forced to get married at the courthouse as no preacher in town would marry my brother.
Sweet justice!
Great burn!
OMG that's amazing!!
The affair may've started when 'Mike' got drunk - BTW, did Penny tied him down and funnel the booze into him to get him 'cr@p faced?'- but Mike chose Penny and partying and booze rather than sobriety. Could have hit AA, could have entered a program, but he didn't. And NTA for responding with the truth about Penny's looks. Mike denigrated his Ex's looks to justify his bad choices - the only way OP would be out of line is if Penny wasn't loud, obnoxious, etc., etc.
Step aunt who locks the bathroom. What does she do with her sanitary products to shield her precious snowflakes from coming into contact with them?
Follows her own advice and feels entitled to dictate everyone else does as well in their own house, raising a replacement for that BIL who expected OP to put used pad in her purse (she also went lenghts to wrap it up so nothing could be seen), while boys in question probably jack off in that girl's shower. That or aunt on the type of birth control that stops periods and gambles with biochemistry and side-effects. Not saying it is but one of which might be why she's gone so irrationally doolaly
She'd be moved to a new school, and be forbidden to see those classmates again. Effective immediately.
The vegan, nta. She is literally asking for a heads up and is angry that she wasn't told about it. She reassured her daughter that she wasn't mad at her and her eating meat is not the problem.
Nta. Your daughter needed to be taught a lesson. However your wife needs own up to what her daughter is becoming. Saying it is the person she is around just gives an excuse. There is no excuse.
My stepdad had quadruple bypass surgery scheduled for a Monday, my mom asked if I'd been having any signs of labor Sunday night. Well, by the time my mom got home from the hospital (different towns) she got called that she was a grandma again.
When my oldest started having periods, her little brother was concerned. Mind you, my 12 yr old is very Nero spicy and refers to her period as her murder or Jason depending g on her mood, lol.
Anyway, my son was curious, so we explained what they are and why girls have them very clinical and science-based ( his preferred learning style, he is also nero spicy).
After all that, he hugged his sister. Told her he would try his best to bug her on these days.
Then he asked why I didn't have the periods, so that was when he got to learn how having him nearly killed us both durring labor. Which resulted in me having an emergency hysterectomy .
He was supper sweet and gave me big hugs. He asked if I ever was sad about not being able to have more babies. I told him not as sad as I would have been if I had lost him. My boy is 7, and he clung so hard to me and cried about how he is glad I'm okay too.
My daughter gave us both a hug and then started cracking jokes ( to defuse the feelings)
Our job as parents is to prepare our children for the world, and this includes the harder topics, the ones that make us all just a bit uncomfortable. If we don't, they will get it some place else.
First story: if the living room is a shared space, then OP is allowed to have meat there too. If he has a problem with meat being in the shared space, then he needs to leave. This sounds like a horrible person to live with. Uncompromising, manipulative, and a gaslighter. "The meat smells bad." "I thought the dinner was old." You can tell when a meal has been eaten or not, he threw it away knowing she hasn't touched it yet. and the excuses were just that, excuses.
So the wife can do what ever she wants, but husband not??
@@kennethsjvold9212 are you stupid? Did I say whatever she wants? But eating normal human food in a place that you should be able to eat food? That's too much to ask? Idiot
@@kennethsjvold9212 She never said the husband couldn't eat there? So why is he allowed to decide on his own where she can eat her meal. You don't touch other peoples food, it is a fundamental rule I feel. And if he has such a bad adversion to meat he should be reluctant to even touch it. He is just being a bag of dicks to be honest.
I know several people who tried vegan or vegetarian and after 6 months with nutritionists were told to start eating some meat because their hair was falling out their nails were brittle and they were in bad shape.
People can be vegan but they have to understand it's not the same for everyone.
@@kennethsjvold9212 she didn’t throw his food away.
The clothing documentation one reminds me of something my mom told me! She was a huge 80's brat. The crazy hair, expensive everything. She kept a calender in her closet where she would document her outfits, specifically so she would not wear the same pants twice in one month, or the same shirt twice in 2 months.
She's so chill now it's really funny to imagine her doing that. Popular people really put in the hours
That's crazy! In middle school I wrote the same pants/shit combo three times a week. The height of facebook was in twenties and i went to great lengths to never be photographed wearing the same thing twice.
I can’t say I blame the manager for not wanting to hire the son after all the drama with the daughter. I bet he was like “I’d be happier if none of y’all ever brought your family dysfunction back in my shop, thanks.”
I would still make daughter apologize, and grovel even after he says no, to discourage low effort, or lies. Would not have said you have to appologize and will deffinitely NOT get my money to go to the fancy camp in the order he had. Now daughter can just cling to her anger and 'betrayal' forever, discarding shame, and get some of the people to pity her, without having to go through even more punishment. Its not the same situation morally, but same thinking how some kids who are constantly being wrongly accused, suspected, harassed and punished for something they did not do, just decide to do the thing because parents insist on giving them the consequences anyway. Like sex, drinking, drugs, bad behaviour, sneaking out, stealing, being disrespectful etc
you can not move a planned wedding on a whim. a quickie wedding can be moved, and October has more days to choose from.
Re OP nearing labor and delivery: He says that you're taking everything from him........BABIES take everything from BOTH parents, and also GIVE everything. They take sleep from you, until they start sleeping through the night. They take funds that you may have wanted to spend at salons or on fancy vacations. They take energy from you when they make messes, have tantrums and stop napping during the days. If your mate is sulking over having to postpone one joy trip when you're so close to labor and delivery, I would question his readiness to be a parent and equal partner in the relationship.
He needs to hear that and that there will be other opportunities for vacations, and that he's being an immature, little AH for trying to guilt you into saying it's okay w/ you if he goes on a trip at the time when you and the baby need him most.
Even if you don't deliver for another 2-3 weeks, and knew that that was the schedule, he would be the AH for not hearing that you need him to stay with you to make you feel secure.
I’m autistic and the comment at at 1:11:18 sounds about right! I remember hearing the story and just thinking, damn, I fully understand the logic and can see why they’d want to know how acceptable things are societally, because I have issues understanding what is/isn’t okay at times and it sounds fun and practical. Honestly does sound lowkey like something I’d do. Albeit I’d probably try figuring out the most socially acceptable way to end conversations and how to know when doing so is appropriate…
Oh heck all I could think was that if any of them went missing she could be a great resource for the cops. Knew exactly what they were wearing last and if she hadn't seen them she could probably predict it at least and maybe have other random info.
Don't gloss over the mom saying to "go easy on her." The dad is the only place she gets any consequences. The mom enables her. She got the balls to act up in the house from SOMEWHERE. The mom doesn't think this is important. The mom isn't insulting anyone overtly, but she holds the same attitudes as her daughter and it's really dumb to only blame her mean girl friends.
truth her daughter literally framed the house cleaner. thats a serious crime and shes a damn criminal. i would have given the phone to the house cleaner as an apology and set the daughter in a program to have to clean things. shes a germaphobe then she needs some gloves and set her loose.
Exactly! This is how “Karens” are created.
For the story about ab*se and divorce. OP does not look like a fool. Ab*se, especially emotional and psychological, builds slowly over time. It took me years to realize just how manipulative my ex really was. It took an argument that ended in ass*ult and the police being called for me to see everything clearly. The divorce was ugly, with restraint orders, repeated vandalism, and some seriously messed up manipulations. It was hard, the scariest thing I've ever done. I had to face serious childhood PTSD triggers. But my family was so supportive, especially my mother. I could never have gotten through it without her. Life isn't perfect, but I am standing on my own two feet and I am free. It was so worth it.
The masculine vs feminine story: NTA! That was the best response ever! Well done and very amusing!
It got even better when the hetero couples joined in which is where the whole gendered roles thing was shown to be complete bs
He was looking for shock or outrage and sulked when they made a game out of it, absolutely brilliantly handled by op
I don’t think anyone in this story was masculine at all.. husband sounds like a complete beta male, soy bitch.
Yeah! It was PERFECT! They kept 100% of the mocking on the statement. The only reason the nephew felt they were mocking him, was because HE was the one who made rhat SUPER homophobic statement.
The story with the wedding, just count how many people are not going to attend and go at some shelter for old people and invite them or bring them all the extra food, like that nothing goes to waste and the marriage starts with the blessings of the people who are less fortunate.
Penny was a complete downgrade. Op's brother is really gonna regret his decision later in life.
How is penny an upgrade? An upgrade for what? The clap? Someone who drags a recovered addict back into their addiction isn’t what I would be happy for either and honestly I would let them know, kids involved or not. I wouldn’t shit on the kids, kids can’t choose their parents, but I wouldn’t be discreet about how I feel about the woman.
The "I don't know" story is actually the mother's problem. OP is a CHILD and thus is still trying to learn how to communicate and followup. OP's mother sounds like a narcissist and TOXIC AF. All SHE needed to do is call the school and band coach directly and determine what the heck is going on. By getting all bent out of shape and using guilt tripping and throwing a fucking tantrum, she shows OP exactly how conditional her love is. Poor OP think they are the asshole. Not in this case. OP didn't mean to be mean, they simply were CONFUSED. WTF? Poor kiddo has been brow beaten so badly their entire life that they think anything they do wrong means that they are a horrible person. That is so sad.
Yeah, OP's mom sounds just like mine. I hope OP does what I didn't have the courage to do: go no contact ASAP! Move out the minute you're able and never call or look back. That mother needs to get into therapy.
@@kellyk6652 That "mother" deserves to be in jail, not therapy.
Mother is abusive and an asshole. I hope OP can get out of that situation asap.
And she messaged the younger child all kinds of abuse and guilt trippy messages because she was throwing a tantrum about not being invited to a random ass event???? Like, tf lmfao
Story 1: He's a hypocrite. A HUGE ONE. Boo hoo. He's being a baby and if the food was made and plated six minutes ago, it would've been WARM. He just used that as an excuse to be petty and he thought his actions would've had no consequences because of his diet. Smh. I would evaluate our relationship after this manipulative attempt and high tail it out.
Hubby in story one is downright abusive. You DO NOT throw out your spouse's (or kid's) dinner.
How is this abusive?
With the OP with the mean girl daughter, I think OP should give her a choice on her punishment. Like either she sleeps outside or volunteers at a homeless shelter for every weekend for x weeks etc. The maid definitely should not have to clean the daughter's space anymore
The uncle’s response to his nephew’s clumsy homophobic remarks was hilarious. I kinda want to do that ranking now with my family, just to see some older couples go at it.
“Oh that’s BULLSHIT Carol, you eat clams, that’s a another “male” point on your chart!” 🤣
Honestly: It was the best answer to that remark.
It was no bullying or ganging up: They made it a game to enjoy for everyone and included his verdict in it without making fun of him or his sexuality as well.
Someone needs to explain to the Nephew that he can not cry ganging up on him when people make out of a stupid remark of his a fun game everyone can enjoy. He made himself the fool and instead of realizing he had and enjoying the game with them: He sulked. Which shows he is still a child and shouldn't expect adults to take his verdict of other people too seriously when it is about something this personal.
He ain't ever gonna be judge or jury ever again of this fun list and never in serious. He was trying to bully them and it backfired in a non agressive way. Marvelous
When my now 21 year old twins were in 5th grade they had a horrible teacher. This teacher yelled, screamed, would kick the trash can. My son is autistic and if you don't know with autistic people even though they're not the focus of the yelling they still process it as if they're the ones being yelled at. This teacher was so horrible thit's horrible that my son's Psychiatrist pulled him out of school for 8 weeks and the school district had to send a teacher to my home every day. This teacher was so bad that if a student was sitting and they dropped a pencil they were not allowed to bend down and pick it up because the "movement distracted her." Us parents final straw was when one child dropped his pencil and bent down to pick it up up. She became so enraged that she went to his desk picked up his spiral notebook and slammed it on his desk not realizing that His hand was in the way and she ended up hitting his finger and cutting him. After that I got all 20 parents together we went to the school board and demanded that she be fired. Guess what they fired her. Yes I yes I believe that parents should support teachers, however an abusive teacher need not be teaching children.
The one with the dead and alive child I would have said if I was op "Why should I care about your child when you treat my child like shit for being alive?"
AH Nephew Gender Story: NTA!!! Total admiration and props to OP on handling this moronic claim with creativity and humor. Well done!
I am SERIOUSLY gonna have to remember this 😂
Ngl. If my bf threw away my food, and made a fuss about 'community space', I'd burst into tears, throw a fit that he wants to kill me, lock myself in my room, and waaaaaay over react. He wants to go petty, I will show him petty. Granted, the relationship would already be over by then, so it would just be the long game of making him leave first, but yeah.
Infant death story: Instead of a memorial on the infant's death, why can't OP's family celebrate the deceased child on its actual birth date? That way, OP's child would have her birthday to herself.
I have a dead child. We NEVER celebrate her death. We celebrate her life. We celebrate her birthday and the light she brought to our lives. I understand when your child is born "sleeping" or stillborn you might only have the one day to celebrate a remembrance. That isn't the case with that family though. I definitely feel that the sister in law wanted it needed to be the center of attention in many ways. Child loss is devastating. I have so much empathy. We don't get to take the life and joy away from others because we have loss and pain though. And we shouldn't want to. I can't imagine expecting a family not to celebrate their own child because I lost mine....
Because that mom is a prick. Remember her gloating that she 'beat' OP by giving birth to the first grandchild? In the perverted way she's still competing, by not letting family give attention to the surviving baby, and 'winning' by taking away birthdays, and possibly future milestones. If given an inch, bets are she would try to make parents in law force OP to change birthday permanently or side that its disrespectful to celebrate on the anniversary of someone's death, so it be very glum, small scale or cancelled until that kid leaves home and prays their new family, friend group would make separate arrangements
WTF? what that girl did to the maid is criminal...jail time!
Like I tell my wife she has alot of attitude for someone who's so ticklish. Wish she would try to punish me😂 throwing away food is a no no for me though. I think the starving kids in Africa is ingrained in my being because I don't waste food unless it's actually rotten
It’s so sad to see so many stories of abusive families, and how many people barely realize they are in one
Hire someone "disruptive" to go to the brothers wedding. When it gets out, make a big deal saying "I'm glad I wasn't there, anyway wanna see the pictures from my wedding?"
Telling the truth when someone has told a lie about you will never put you in the wrong.
she didn't need to apologise to ricky. she needed to go to the coffee shop and explain herself.
"Would let" her repair her purse??? LET HER?! It's her damn money! Oh my lord
The story about nephew's father not wanting son to spend time with cousins. Claimed it wasn't Uncle's (his brother) to tell nephew the truth and undermine dad. It became Uncle's place because you made him part of the story when you threw him under the bus and made your son believe he was no longer welcome in his uncle's house. You didn't want to take responsibility for your kid's feelings.
Number one on the list of things you never say around a kid you have with your ex: "my time with your mother was a mistake" or anything of similar meaning. Cause what you tell the kid, even if you don't mean it, is that you don't want them.
Stupid teenage nephew can be as salty as he wants, he got off extremely light.
If he said that to a stranger getting made fun of for being stupid would be the least of his worries.
1:34:58 this mother sounds immature af. She refuses to do her job unless she gets her way? This was not OPs fault.
The parents of the child that died should absolutely take that day for themselves for as many times as they need, but should not expect everyone to come. I say this as someone who had a child die. We still celebrate him on his birthday every year but just remember him and take any time we need on his death date. It's a horrific thing to go through and having empathy is important as that level of grief and immeasurable pain can make people act irrationally, but it is still okay to have boundaries and celebrate people who are alive.
The daughter story. I'd have reached out to my local police about having her in the cells for a night. Explain she is starting to perform fraud acts and pin theft crimes on others, which I believe is illegal. If the cops would comply, have a false arrest happen with the maid reporting it. I'd also post it on her social media what she did so everyone can see what type of kid she is. HARDCORE life long consequences, as this has been an escalating pattern over a prolonged time and she hasn't changed.
Omg, the story at around 50 min with the baby that passed on the same day the sibling's baby was born! -There was a story similar to it where a couple had twins. One passed away while the other survived. Every year they would have a celebration to remember the baby that passed. Like a death-day instead of a birthday. They would visit the grave every time and make the entire day about the deceased twin and not the living twin. OP, the living twin, hated that his bday was never celebrated and any time he brought up wanting to have a bday party or cake or anything like that, his parents would say he was disrespecting his twin that passed! I think OP's friends threw a small surprise party at another friend's house or something, his parents saw the gifts, and blew up at him for celebrating the day his twin died. It was so maddening, but apparently it can happen. I bet if they had given in in this story, the parents of the deceased baby would insist the other baby never celebrate their bday on that day, not just stop at their 1rst year.
I remember that story. It was just so sad.
Op let your family know they agreed to save the date of your wedding and if they aren’t there you will know how much their word I’d worth! Or worthless as the case may be! Cut the dead weight from your life and move forward knowing there will be less to hold you down! Congrats on your bright future!
omg lol. the outfit one. as soon as they mentioned doing it to know how often it’s okay to repeat outfits, i was like “autism.” that is TOTALLY something a neurodivergent person would do, plus OP not seeing why it’s considered “weird” and just seeing it as a fun way to collect data and enjoying the routine of it. the whole post screams neurodivergent, i love it!😂
omg the wife/sister pregnancy one... no way would I have been traveling over an hour from my hospital that close to delivery. my docs told me that I should stay within half an hour of the hospitals they deliver through... and I was having no big worries about being allowed to labor.
The OP whose daughter falsely accused the maid of theft: being forced to spend the night in the dirt and germs isn’t likely to acclimate her to dirt and germs. It’s more likely to reinforce the phobia. I would ground her from the friends who seem to have influenced this bad behavior; in fact I’d make that an indefinite thing. I’d also consider counseling because it appears she has some pretty extreme behavior issues if she literally put herself in the hospital the last time she was grounded, and clearly also lacks empathy for others.
As a woman with autism, I understand exactly why a girl would start tracking such data and then continue keeping the record beyond meeting the original goal. We struggle with unwritten social rules like what to wear and when. Tracking what others do helps us learn those rules. We are also creatures of habit and tend to like collecting esoteric data. Train spotting is a great example of this. Personally, I keep a record of every movie, show and book that I watch/read and religiously add additional notes etc
As for the idea that she hadn’t told her friends because she knew it was something that would be viewed negatively. Nup. Probably not the case. I doubt that she ever gave it an active thought. At worst, she may have subconsciously been aware that it was unusual and feared other people’s judgment.
I found her story adorable! Idk why but I'd love to go over her findings and I would take her intentions at face value because she seems so wholesome and honest about why she wanted to study people. I would probably join in and have her keep me posted lol
The wedding story is very telling, OP is being shown by her family how little they think of her. I’ve been no contact with my biological family for some time now, lots of abuse growing up as a kid and as a young adult, featuring physical violence, homophobia, sexism, hardcore ableism, a mother aware my brother was beating me, a mother who didn’t want to parent and forced me to bring up my brother when I was a child myself, and much, much more. When I cut them from my life they only ever contacted me to send abuse, they went straight for some hardcore ableism and threats, I blasted them on social media showing folk EXACTLY who they are and it massively backfired against them, because they couldn’t hide from the horrible stuff they were saying, and I cut all ties and haven’t bothered with them since.
OP is in this sort of situation where her family is telling her how little they think of her, how little they prioritise her, and how little they care about her and are trying to bully her into submission so she’ll what they want as they dote on their favourite child, and honestly she should uninvite the lot of them. They don’t deserve to be there at her wedding, her parents especially for supporting her brothers very obvious manipulative behaviour.
I always try to remember this in relationships, "There is three sides to every story...His, hers, and the truth.". It helped when I got a divorce.
I would tell the entire extended family and friends it’s a shot gun wedding. They are pregnant pre marriage. Oh the Christian horror lol
OP, you need to get very harsh with your wife even to the point of divorce. She is encouraging your daughter to become a horrible heap of steaming crap narcissist. Stop it now, even if you it cause you to get divorced
I dont have kids but I would have said, "run away if you think getting your home shower electricity phone and food all paid for is so abusive because if you run away you'll have to pay for all of those things yourself. Youre still going to face the coffee shop owner even if i have to drag you in the car and set the safety locks!"
Tbh the band story made me really upset. The mom sounds like a child. I hope op gets out of that situation soon.
I hate the period locked bathroom story. My grandmother told me I could throw my pads in my uncle's bathroom garbage while I was there for 2 months because of my cousins. Mind you our families had lived with each other on and off depending on how my mom or her brother was doing financially so my cousins had certainly been in bathrooms where girls threw their used pads in the garbage. The solution was make me carrying my used pads through the house and to the kitchen to throw away in a garbage with a lid which was embarrassing for me at 14 but I did being in my uncle's place. Also I remember once my cousin stopped to ask me what it was on my way to the kitchen. I still dont understand the point of a bathroom garbage if it cant be used.
For the OP that tracks the clothing of their friends I get a HUGE ASD/ADHD vibe. Especially because the data was to inform their own clothing choices to appear normal or socially acceptable
I'm fine with making her camp in the yard for a night but you really need to take that iPhone away from her also since she's willing to give it away to the maid anyways
October wedding - pregnant bride should run away fast her husband to be (OPs brother) has shown her what sort of husband/ father he is going to be. She deserves better.
Husband spends wife bonus- OP should tell his family that he spent thousands on the stuff. Doubt any of them would agree with what he did.
Zoom class - when my son work from home at the beginning of the day he would let his father and me know when he would be having meetings so that we wouldn't make a noise or enter his room. Communication and respecting people's boundaries is important.
You know I get parents want them to get married but the parents should have said no when he picked that day. The parents, Tim and the gf knew OP's wedding was that day
I wonder how OP is doing now
Never sign up to be the villain in any scenario that you aren't the actual villain of. That's the path towards madness and not one to be taken unless you enjoy being a doormat. You can't force bonds that others are unwilling to make, no matter how much you wish otherwise. If you try to make it happen, other people are going to pop popcorn, grab a drink, sit in a comfy chair, and just watch the fireworks illuminate the area.
Just wondering if anyone heard "the common area" part I've been married almost 41 yrs our entire house is common area. OK folks has marriage become like being a rm mate, I'm so confused
The friend that keeps data of her friends' outfits is not an AH in my opinion. I would honestly find it adorable if I found someone studying people's habits like that and everything just for analysis' sake. I'd love seeing their findings lol. I forget about what people have told me even though I care very much so I've thought of taking notes on people just to remember things. But yeah it's adorable I'd honestly be friends with that person lol
37:38 I mean OP found a way to deal with nephew acting like an ass, and suddenly nephew is a vulnerable child who the mean adults ganged up on. OP didn’t even bully nephew, they almost bullied themselves? OPs solution is hilarious and great.
If I were OP, I would stop arguing about it, dobt give her brother attention and just enjoy her wedding, no matter who attended. Hes upset that he wasn't invited and decided to be petty just to spark some kind of argument while accusing her of wanting to get married first. He wants that, don't give it to him.
The one with the husband spent thousands. His family will soon be tired of him. They won't want a grown man staying for free at their home for long. They will soon figure out why you left. He had it good. He didn't work and he didn't really want to.
I have one very important question. Where the AH husband spent her bonus did she take every thing he purchased back for refund or just sell. NEED TO KNOW, PLEASE!
re relatives wanting to cancel OP's daughter's birthday to commemorate (celebrate) untimely death of OP's neice: So, SIL and brother want to do a Good Friday thing every year? That's what Day of the Dead is for- to honor those who have passed, especially those who have passed in the last year. The altar can be as elaborate as desired, with whatever messages the attendees wish.
Mistress story - Amanda deserved to cry after what she did to OP's mother. Cheaters deserve what they get!
I’m a longtime vegan who lived with a non vegan but I would never have thrown out his food. Most vegans would not be such jerks
The story with the maid is either a copy from someone else, or the OP erased parts of the original. He fired the maid on the spot, told her to get her things and “get out now”, and didn’t bother to watch the video until the next day!! They tore his ass up in the comments.
I would have called the mistress his " side piece" instead. He DID cheat on his wife.
OP who was tracking clothing options doesn’t sound like an AH… they sound like they’re neurodivergent and don’t fully understand what’s up
LMFAOOOOOOO THAT GAY COUPLE IS ICONIC
I feel like with the vegan thing: yes, you DO need to know if your vegan child now has meat. this can cause some issues digestively. a parent SHOULD KNOW these things. it's not controlling, it's a medical thing. My friends who are vegan will sometimes get sick because their bodies aren't used to it.
"breaking up over a computer"
this is what so many people don't get. it's not about the _thing_ at the center of the last straw. it is about why that happened. hubby was a controlling gaslighting dirtbag, that could very easily progress into abuse.
omg that knock knock made me jump while simultaneously feeling like I was suddenly listening to a radio show 😂
"Eyes got tired from working and wanted to watch tv" yeah as someone who wears glasses and who's eye sight is slowly getting worse, thats one thing optometrists DO NOT RECOMMEND!!! if your eyes are tired from staring at a screen, you dont go look at another. You take a break and look at something in the distance (trees or something) or close your eyes with a warm clother over the lids to relax your eyes.
This line alone makes me believe the husband is full of crap.
I remember always having a lot of cuts on my hands and my dad yelling at me to do the dishes bc "the fucking soap water will clean it just do the dam dishes" I did it and he's right it built character
I hate that many of the good ones don't have an update.
57:54 the husband will _let_ OP use her own money. TF….
your brother just lost you to be ashamed of themselves for thinking that life stopped just because they lost their little bundle of joy and they're trying to stop you from enjoying your child screw them they're being self-centered I get that they lost a little one but Life goes on
The one with the Brother lying about op to his 14 year old. They said the ‘it’s not your place’ struck a cord in them as a parent. So if the op ever sees this comment; it was not your place until your brother used YOUR name and slandered it to your nephew. Your brother MADE it so that you were involved which means he can no longer claim you had no place to interfere. Once the father himself involved you, an uninvolved party, into the argument you now have Carte Blanche to involve yourself as much as you want. Go ham fam.
Mocking my nephew: NTA. He was being intentionally obnoxious and a little jerk. OP just found a way to set him straight (no pun intended) and show him what an ass he was being, without giving him more ammunition. The other adults felt OP was right and handling the situation the right way, so they followed suit. They didn't "gang up on him". Nobody turned on him and went off. They showed him how absurd and wrong he was, and hopefully taught him a valuable lesson in manners and how to treat others.
Ask who will be coming to your wedding, because now you can have more people you had to omit for family.