Happy Sunday everyone! One of your previously requested a topic on BPD? We just recently finished it and have it released. Hope it helps those who are suffering from it or want to raise awareness about BPD. Also, we set up a shop to promote our digital magazines that we have been working on. The magazines aim to raise awareness on various mental health and psychology themes. If you like to help support us, you can grab a digital bundle here: iheartpsychology.myshopify.com/collections/frontpage/products/psych2go-magazine-1-4-adhd-mental-health-substance-abuse-social-anxiety-digital
I have been told two things about BPD. Firstly women are more often diagnosed with BPD instead of a stronger or more destructive mental disorder because shrinks don't want to diagnose women with more severe personality disorders. Secondly I hear that many shrinks use the BPD diagnoses as a substitute for Narcissistic Personality disorder so they don't scare off their patient cause many that suffer with NPD will reject that diagnosis if given to them outright so treatment for their NPD is done under the moniker of BPD so the shrink can give them the help they need. That's what I have read about BPD at least...... I have an ex. She kidnapped our son a few years back... I know where he is now but it was a long court fight and my own investigation that found her and him. For his birthday she took him to an animal range... I asked her to take lots of pictures and videos. So she posted selfies of herself on her face book. Shes been legally Diagnosed BPD but she is every bit of NPD.
Do you have a video about Dissociative Identity Disorder? I think I have that illness :(. I've read a lot of articles about it. Sorry for my bad English 😅 Should I go to a specialist? I don't want to get locked away :(
Masibulele Mampofu, Maybe but with Bipolar these high and low mood swings happened in weeks, while for people with BPD such as myself they happen hour to hour.
@@spiritedrenee9895 feelings of invincibility are indicative of Bipolar I, which is often what BPD patients are initially misdiagnosed with. However, we don't have manic episodes like that. Mania is serious, but not part of BPD. I encourage you to speak to a psychologist for diagnosis and treatment, especially if you feel suicidal. Hope you're hanging in there
Usually when I’m in a place where I get 100% positive feedback and agreement from others all those traits go away hahahhaa it’s rare to find such an environment tho, cuz I ward people away with my odd ways and stuff
I dated someone with BPD. I still love her. And I have a lot I’d like to say. While many people with BPD welcome therapy, many others don’t want to try it. But at their lowest lows, they often desperately need therapy. It's extremely tough, both for them and for those around them. When they want to try meeting with a psychologist experienced in treating BPD, there is hope. They do have unbelievably strong emotions and attachments, which makes them so incredibly alive. To be their partner, you have to know what makes them happy and everything that makes them upset, how to speak with them when their mood swings, and how to love them the way they need to be loved. Stick through it, and you will be rewarded with intense love. They're beautifully broken souls. They're difficult to date. At some point they'll turn on you no matter how good you are. But don't miss the beauty buried inside them. The pain that has largely defined them also softened their hearts and gave them empathy like no other. They feel the world like an extension of their body. They're in touch, connected, and so alive. Though having it is certainly not your fault, BPD sucks, like being cursed. No denying that. But it's also a gift. Deep empathy, a kind heart, and deep love are priceless. Mentally those with BPD have a voice in their head suggesting that they are not loved and they are worthless. If you have or think you have it, I'm talking to you now. In time, you can befriend that awful voice. That voice is not the voice of self-hatred but the voice of fear, and fear can keep you alive. Fear is a powerful motivator to make immediate changes. On the other hand, it can also be a powerful motivator to stagnate or regress to something more familiar, even if it harms you. But let's go way back to the teachings of Aristotle and try this: One healthy way to live is the 'golden middle way' - a balance of excess and deficiency. You don't like it, and it's not your fault that you're in this situation, but you do have the voice of excess giving you excessive fear. That is a vice, but that is okay because you have another vice that everyone can have, and that is cold, hard reasoning. You can come to the truth and make good decisions by listening to both honest, logical reasoning and the voice suggesting, "He hasn't bought me flowers or anything for a month so he probably doesn't love me anymore." The feeling represents something real, in this case a desire for more expressions of love. But it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. And he probably did buy you ice cream or something the other day, but your emotions frequently are overwhelmingly consuming. I know communication can be really difficult sometimes, but just tell your partner, instead of bottling it up as anxiety and sadness, "I wish you'd buy me more things - just small affectionate things so I'm reminded you really care." I'm sure they would oblige. I know I would. :) Mentally BPD is a confusing maze, a torture chamber, and your own personal devil telling you to think and act on impulse, but I believe that with honest and upfront communication (a lot of it) with your partner, it doesn't have to be a problem. And if you can accept it and embrace it as a tidal force in your life that you can't avoid, then you can learn to surf over those waves instead of getting battered by them. You can't control them, but that's fine. Let them flow under you as you surf on top of them. Yes, I know it's easier said metaphorically than done, but it can be done. And when you do, BPD might no longer be a curse, allowing you to keep only the gift. For the most part BPD is treatable, thanks to something called DBT, but if and only if individuals with BPD decide for themselves that they would benefit from some professional help. For some people with BPD, especially those comorbid with NPD, that usually takes a near-death experience I've read, but maybe - just maybe - someone with BPD reading this can really hear me and understand when I say that I'm not telling you to change who you are. BPD has become a part of you, and change is scary. I'm just letting you know that people can help you grow. Growth never hurts anyone; it brings me daily happiness. With a little professional help, all that has defined you remains, and now people with lots of training can offer you new tools and new perspectives. Get an official diagnosis if you have not already, and formally begin this next stage of your growth. For anyone diagnosed with BPD who knows they aren't doing okay, it's worth it. I'm not a trained psychologist, but I just want everyone to be at their best, and in control of their lives. No one should feel like they're along for the ride of their own lives. Sometimes we all need a little push to get going again, and that's why I'm here. We're all strong enough to take control. At least I believe that.
Vampira, greto, and louise - You're all very welcome. Happy to bring a little bit more meaning and beauty into your lives. It's kinda what I live for haha. I edited the end of my comment a bit more as well. Hope you all have a lovely rest of your week. If you have any questions for me, I'm happy to chat. I'd like to leave you with a quote from one of my favorite movies. "What I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart. I love you."
Why do people think that people who are diagnosed with bpd are assholes? I am officially diagnosed and most people tell me that I'm one of the most kind and giving people they ever met. My boyfriend says that I can be pretty tough to handle at times, but that will never change the fact that I'm an incredibly nice person 99% of the time. Yes, I make mistakes and I am able to hurt people who are close to me, but I always feel incredibly guilty. I'm not an asshole just because I was diagnosed with a personality disorder. Don't ever judge people you cannot understand. You don't know how it feels like living in hell.
Exactly why I don't tell people. I try to compensate by buying coworkers cookies and other treats as often as I can afford, compliment people, pretend to be cheerful by saying "hi" to everyone coming in for the next shift, and donate to charity. We had a silent auction at work for Relay for Life. I handmade some stuff for it and even bid on things. I heard we are having another at the end of the summer so I am spending a huge amount of time drowning myself in making new stuff for it, but I tend to melt down a lot due to these projects when I realize I need something else in order to finish it. I feel bad for the charity thing because I don't feel like I'm doing it for the right reasons. It feels like I'm compensating and it's more about my personal therapy for some of my other mental illnesses. My husband insists that everything I do is because I am a good person deep down with severe issues that are hard to overcome enough. I am so happy he is understanding... I also have PTSD, so he has a LOT to deal with. I have attempted suicide and he alone is trying to do his best to keep me alive and functioning. My kids don't know yet and I am afraid to tell them because BPD is often seen as abusive by a lot of people that grew up with someone with it. We aren't trying to exhibit these behaviors out of maliciousness. We can't help it and we will and always hate ourselves for it.
I stopped being religious years ago because I do find it hard to believe that some higher power lets people suffer, not just me. I do appreciate the good vibes, though. I know that you have good intent whether I am religious or not. Despite religion, this shows you have a good heart. I hope the best for you as well. Be safe and stay strong.
Mysteria Kiito I'm not here to change ur mind just something to think about. God does care but his authority has been challenged and he's allowing fair time for Satan to try to prove himself so right not the devil controls the world but that will soon end and the world will be resorted and nobody will challenge god again because his point will be proven that he is the rightful sovereign ruler of the universe. 💜💜💜 best of wishes to u
My mother has BPD and will never remain consistent on her feelings. One minute, I'm her favorite person in the world and she adores me. The next? She's yelling at me over something that has never been a problem. When I moved out into my own place, she spent the week while I was packing scolding me for both leaving and not packing quickly enough. It was hard living with her. It's so difficult to love someone and simultaneously be constantly pushed away. Her recklessness put our family in financial danger several times and she tends to draw relationships with emotional abusers ever since her divorce. I miss my mother, but I don't know who she is.
Yes! I know exactly what you mean. This one time I was in search for a job and she helped me with my search for one. When I told her she didn't have to help me with finding a job she insisted on helping me. The very next day however she starts yelling at me that i'm lazy and should find a job on my own. I was mindblown. I didn't understand her sudden change of mind. Because we had no idea she had Borderline I got angry with her and yelled back at her after throwing some insults my way.
I'm sorry man. My mother has bpd and abused me throughout my childhood. When he was at her worst I couldn't leave my room. Eventually there was a change in custody. Personally, I found distancing myself as much as possible from her was healther for me
@@lookatme.3794 For all you know they could have been clinically diagnosed- And they dont appear to be proud of having BPD, they were merely thanking the channel for not representing suffers in a negative way because those with BPD are typically portrayed as manipulative/abusive; Its true in some cases but like fuyu said, anyone can be manipulative.
After I was diagnosed with bpd I told a close friend and she did research and then she told me insensitivity "it's basically depression" but the way she said it angered me and I wanted to yell at her and cry at the same time because it was just the little thing that bothered me
dont worry as she grows and becomes more mature she will look back on what she said to you and feel like an idiot for saying such a stupid comment. I hope you made it atleast a little bit obvious you were upset by what she said...
I told my best friend I have it after being diagnosed twice and correlating so many of the bad situations I’ve gotten myself in and my behaviour and relationship breakdowns and mood etc etc all of it, and she just brushed it off saying I don’t, that I’m not crazy. It’s lovely cause she’s basically my only close friend..
I didn’t know I had bpd until my 18th birthday pretty recently.. I would always say sorry even tho I knew it was hard to control. I lost her because of this but it’s okay she’s moved on. She even noticed my mood change saying “sometimes you are the most nicest and sweetest person I met but other times you are completely different “
You may think that that is a way out but its not. I have tried and almost made it my reality time after time. You are not alone. I myself still struggle to stay afloat in this hard thing called life but it does get better. I promise you if you asked me a year or two if I would ever say this is tell you your a lier and a dumb ass to think I cared if I was dead or alive. But it does matter. If I had my myself disappear then I could never have seen my big brothers little kid or see my little brother grow up anyway what I'm saying it there is something to live for your just not seeing it. Just keep trying you'll make soon enough.
Seriously my thoughts, you can't live a life regretting and being ashamed of who you are. I actually like being like this beyond all the problems my intensity and inestability cause to me
I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone I long for that feeling to not feel at all The higher I get, the lower I'll sink I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim
I think I might have BPD but I would have to be diagnosed by a doctor to know for sure. I mean, it sounds a lot like me but who knows, I might have something else.
Pastel_Thing yeah, I’m scared to ask my mom so that way I can be diagnosed but idk I don’t want help also. ;-; maybe I should just forget about it. I’m not sure.
I’ve tried to say something to my parents... but my dad just thinks I’m being paranoid or like I’m being a hypochondriac or something. He says that bc I’m self aware that I don’t have bpd (or “schizophrenia” as he called it)
Exactly. It kinda sucks because when I told my parents about my anger issues and how I constantly fight with my best friend because I feel like he hates me, they just said "it's just puberty". Maybe it was. But it sucks. I just want to enjoy life without feeling like I was on some kind of an emotional rollercoaster.
It is sadly.. i dont know how to manage, plus if i say this to anyone they ll make fun of, no one wont belive me, cause, everyone sees me as im kind of a 'party guy' or something. But im not. I dont know how to manage it, i need help. And if you're too, anyone who reeding this, you're not alone about this feelings. Dont feel alone. You ll never walk alone
As someone who has struggled with bpd a very long time the mean harsh comments I see on here absolutely break my heart . I cannot say I've never hurt anyone with my emotional rollercoasters but I can say that I'm highly compassionate and loving and that not everyone with bpd is the same . Anyone is capable of hurting someone . Try putting yourself in the shoes of the person suffering with this it's not a pleasant thing . I hope people are able to find compassion and start being kinder to one another .
Sabrina Tofts I know this comment is old, but I relate a lot. I’ve recently realized that my emotional issues fit into BPD perfectly, especially considering my background, and overlapping OCD and Major Depressive Disorder. Realizing I have BPD and trying to educate myself more on how others see it has been EXTREMELY painful and upsetting. They talk like everyone with BPD is an explosive, abusive, manipulative monster - as if being shitty is in the diagnostic criteria. Outbursts directed towards others arent, and never have been , in the diagnostic criteria. Just the experiences of the emotions and shame itself. It’s very disappointing and upsetting to see so many people spreading misinformation. I’m sorry we share this experience.
I think the problem is is that a lot of people are frustrated with their own experiences and cant keep themselves from being mad. Which is completely understandable. But people have got to remember that this is a mental illness and not a moral failing. Its ok to be frustrated with the situation and maybe at the person suffering from bpd but these are symptoms. If you become bitter and resentful than you might catch some of those bad habits as a healthy individual.
GaiR BaeR they don't actually know what causes bpd....there's a correlation with abuse and bpd but that doesn't mean abuse of any kind is actually the reason for the disorder (and they said that in the video)
I remember various traumas throughout my life but they're very vague. Don't understand how I can obtain all these symptoms when I can't recall most of my traumas? Can bpd be a genetic thing? However I'm guessing not because it's caused by your own traumas right? I don't know because my mom also has severe bpd as well
dangerous womens I have BPD, and when you go through certain events that can really impact you in a bad way, your mind will try to forget it, block it out, but you will always have a scar that's almost ripping open, even if you can't remember exactly what happened, but it happened, also then you can also become the product of the environment.
Love should never be unconditional. There's no need to devalue people with mental illnesses but if they're causing harm to you, whether that be mentally or physically then that is definitely a condition to stop loving them. Unconditional love is a trap. And people deserve better
Heinz Unconditional love doesn’t mean subject yourself to abuse: you can still show love to someone while protecting yourself through boundaries. Not to mention, many of us with BPD did lack unconditional love as a child and are thusly screwed up from it.
I'll be the crazy obsessive chick. I am a good friend and try to be "normal" and it's hard to explain my slip ups. I haven't found anyone who wants to deal with a friend with so much baggage. I take too much patience. I am too much work.
Sara Allen I get where you're coming from. I hate that I sometimes resemble the "crazy girlfriend" or "crazy/creepy girl" but it almost feels like it's the mold I fall into in times where my emotions really get a hold of me. Other people don't understand us sometimes, and that's okay. We're not always perfect, we don't always do the best things to deal with our problems, we don't always treat other people the way we should. It's okay. The best thing we can do as people with BPD is accept that we aren't perfect, and that we see the world in a different way. We have to learn to see it in a way that paints us in a positive light.
I have, or at least had, a good friend who has BPD. For the beginning years I knew her, she was an amazing person. She loved magic, tarot cards, card games among countless other things. She was quite wise, and was always willing to offer advice about personal problems. I looked up to her. One night, I went out with her, her boyfriend and some other friends to a bar. Sometime, her boyfriend said some pretty rude things about her (I can't quite remember, we were all pretty drunk), and we eventually left without him. That one fateful night her BPD took ahold of her and she was never the same. She became overly paranoid, believing that others hated her and wanted to leave her. She was quite violent, and picked up fights, both verbal and physical, pretty easily with even her closest friends. She once got in a fight with a new boyfriend she had, and threatened to slap his son. We had called 911, and they took her into a mental institution for a few weeks, but they eventually checked her out and she was sent home. I used to make daily calls with her to let her know I care about her, but most conversations ended with accusing me of hating her and threatening to kill herself. She spammed my phone with messages and calls, and after two years of nonstop violence, I eventually cut all ties with her. I don't even know if she's still alive today. She very well may have finally killed herself. I hope she hasn't. Because underneath all that BPD-covered hatred and violence and jealousy and paranoia lies a beautiful person with her own personality, her own accomplishments and so much more. I miss the old her. I hope one day, if she's still alive, that she'll finally be willing to seek treatment for her condition so she can break through this false personality. What I'd give to see her like she truly is, just one more time...
TMR Teckk When people say normal in this sense, they mean most common. It's not common to have a mental illness because you're not typically born with it.
there's more than just one way of being "not normal" if I have a green arm that would be weird even if most people weren't normal because very few people still have a green arm, there might be few people who are "normal" but the individual ways of being a different a rare enough that we know they aren't normal.
I like this, if the sentiment goes both ways and is not just an apology for suckiness. BPD is called that because we as a society agree about certain behavioural values and adequate reactions, and some people are, as harsh as it sounds, not good enough. Everyone including themselves suffers from that. But you are right normalcy is hard to define especially on an individual basis. individual culutural differences or difficult or "enabling" circumstances might alter someone's behavior. They also cause different interpretations of each criterion for BPD. Say Agatha is rich (enabling circumstance) and buys shit like a 100$ bag on impulse....that is still less harmful to her than buying a 20$ bag on impulse is for Berta who is poor. We don't know what Agatha would do in Bertas place for sure. thus we migt not be able to diagnose her. Or: a fat therapist might not call impulsive eating "sick" as soon as a skinny therapist. So not all BPD people are the same and equally "abnormal". Fairness (aknoweldging individual traits) is important, also so that "they" have nothing in their hands against their helpers and victims. At the same time "normal" people should not get away with BPD-like behavior just because they are non-BPD, or because their therapist happens to have a soft heart and doesn't call their choices mentally ill.
This diagnosis ruined my life. Yeah, I always acknowledged that I have some serious problems with my emotional life and I would get upset over the smallest things. Almost all of my close and important relationships have come to its end. But I never felt depressed or bad about myself before unless I really really hurt someone by insulting them the way I acted. I felt pretty normal just "a bit oversensitive" After diagnosis I started to pay more attention to my behavior but in the wrong way. If I would lose my control and jump to an emotional roller coaster again I would spend a long time apologizing every fucking human-being after I calmed down. And I feel so bad and depressed about it. I keep thinking that once again I caused a scene and everybody think I'm a stupid drama queen, even though I didn't insult anyone. Overreact - apologize - overreact - apologize...the loop just goes on and it drives me so fucking crazy. I hate myself. Fortunately I'm about to start my psychotherapy and get help. I don't wanna change completely to a new person. I'm proud of my extreme emotions when they are positive. I can give more love than anyone in the world and my sense of justice is strong since I can put myself so well in someone else position (strong emotional life plays a role) and then stood up for all the people who need defending. I just wish I could control myself better, that's all I really want.
me too when the psychiatrist diagnosed me with it I googled it and read the most horrendous things ,I do relate to most of the symptoms but when they say things like reckless sex unstable relationships etc I don't relate because I isolate myself so bad I don't even form relationships and my depression is so bad I don't even want to have sex ,I don't abuse drugs etc but the self harm and mood swings are accurate but at the same time every psychiatrist you meet would probably give you a different diagnosis
I know the feeling was diagnosed with BPD three months ago, I know the toll it takes on your life. I lost my girlfriend of 4 years, career, family members. Screw BPD. I wish you the best of luck in your therapy. If you ever need anyone to talk to or someone who understands your emotional roller coaster, because trust me I know the track. Just email me: Davis.Fox@sae-nashville.net
I know this feeling all too well. I was in therapy because I felt sad and suicidal all the time, even in moments I knew I should be happy. I never bothered to look up any mental illnesses or disorders since I didn’t deal with them but then they said I had a depression, and probably some personality disorder, too. They wanted to investigate that so they could throw that label on me but I didn’t cooperate... I already felt bad for the fact that I was in a depression and it was only then I noticed that I was literally sad 24/7. I became more suicidal but eventually I started feeling a little better and then stopped with therapy. Then I felt amazing again. I just don’t want to have those labels on me, I know I will be more self-conscious and not in a good way. But now personality disorders do interest me very much haha
I'm among the recently diagnosed, but there's no DBT near me. There's one about 50 miles away and it's $80 per session, which is far too much for me to afford, sadly. Anyway, unfortunately I'm in the same boat as you, Krista-Maria, where now I'm aware of the messed up stuff I've been doing all this time, except now I feel even worse about it, and it's breaking me down. I've spent far more time depressed since my diagnosis (they also said I was codependent, which is a stellar f-ing combination) because of the guilt and self-shaming cycle. I confessed my diagnosis to my mother. I showed her the first few minutes of an episode of Bojack Horseman (episode title, "Stupid Piece of Shit") because that's what it's like in my head, and I told her the truth, that no one hates me as much as I hate me. She says I'm generous, kind, and basically a good person, despite my flaws. All I could think about was that the scale is so severely tipped from the staggering amount of flaws. I just wish I knew how to be better, how to be a person. Except I'm fucked up and I don't know how to un-fuck my brain.
I hope you meant that the video was cool not the decease. Cause it's not fucking cool. It's like living in hell where the only feelings that you can get is pain and anxiety. You don't want to open up and tell anyone about this shit devouring you from the inside so you slowly disappear in your own fears, concerns and depression. This is not fucking cool. This is suffering.
Ive been diagnosed with BPD recently and for 15 years ive been wrongfully treated for depression. Hopefully with treatment i can be happy and live a normal excistence one day.
After taking a psychopathology class in college last year, I realized this was me. All the symptoms lined up. I had been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and even bipolar disorder II by some; and every time I tried to tell a doctor I was experiencing symptoms extremely similar to BPD, they dismissed it. I explained myself so much. I did everything I could to get someone to understand I have BPD. It isn’t hard for someone, even in my state of mind, to relate to and identify with a diagnosis so deeply. I still haven’t found any psychiatrist that has properly diagnosed me with it, but I instead have diagnosed myself. My therapist understands this, at the very least. But what I’m trying to say is.. people, STOP being afraid of BPD. Stop being afraid of a diagnosis. Stop being afraid of us. Stop being afraid of me.
After my experiences with my Borderline mother...Damn straight I am afraid of you and every decent, kind and caring human being should afraid of every Borderline.
When i was diagnosed i was given no information of symptoms to look out for. Recently i hit the wall over a bitter wrong that was done to me. While i dealt with it poorly by not explaining why i was so terribly hurt as well as my spouse by a lie meant to ostracise us from an incredibly painful funeral i swallowed it until i snapped on line and unknown to me was a group chat i have been vilified. Fine I can understand it but at the same time they played the victim which made me look like a vindictive bitch. I cant ho an hour without it appearing in my thoughts. This is not bpd this is life. Good and bad
What does it feel like,Im married with 2 kids it takes a huge toll on a marriage its very hard...But I have bern married to the same guy for 15 years,not going to lie it is not easy in the least
J M awkward doesn't quite cover it, right? It's the worst. I hate myself so much and constantly make me stand in a bad light, I feel like I didn't deserve anything that could do me good. And it does affect my relationship sometimes especially when it gets to intimacy. Trying to explain your partner how much you absolutely do not like yourself and it not being his fault is tough. He knows how much I'm struggling with myself and the worst thing for him is not knowing what to do. I always tell him being there is enough but he still wishes to be able to help me. And that frustrates him a lot. Which results in me intensifying the negative way I see myself because I made him feel this bad. It's just one major struggle. And I don't know what to do about it. Because I'm waiting for therapy since months. And nothing is happening. He knows how self destructive my thoughts are, I don't necessarily hurt myself as in cutting but there are times, where I can't walk because my foot hurts or I lose my job because I'm constantly sick although I'm physically at full health. And he can't help me. That's the worst part of it. To see your partner being frustrated and sad because he can't do anything to help. That hurts.
Davis Fox 1 second ago I know the feeling was diagnosed with BPD three months ago, I know the toll it takes on your life. I lost my girlfriend of 4 years, career, family members. Screw BPD. If you ever need anyone to talk to or someone who understands your emotional roller coaster, because trust me I know the track. Just email me: Davis.Fox@sae-nashville.net
Most people diagnosed with it don’t even have it I’ve got one psychologist telling others I have the traits of this BPD, however my counselor doesn’t think I have it at all, she sees that I’m autistic... high functioning autism...
Jrew Cooper anti vaxxer, VACANATE YOUR KIDS, IF YOU DONT YOUR KIDS WILL DIE, AUTISUM IS NOT CAUSED BY VACATIONS, AND ITS BETTER TO HAVE A AUTISTIC KID THEN A DEAD ONE
I am clinically diagnosed with BPD by an actual doctor, and take a shit ton of meds for different things. Mental illness is thrown around like a trend now, but having a real mental illness is literally living within your own personal hell. BPD makes my personal relationships rocky and unstable(Romantic, friendships, family). Im truly lucky to have found someone who understands i cant control my sudden mood swings and who knows that ill say things I dont really mean. I dont know how my boyfriend puts up with it, but the fact remains, he never gave up. Personally? DBT never worked well with me. It might have been the lady running it but i felt more threatened than anything.
I recently started dating a girl who has been diagnosed with this illness she 100 percent has it. We met about 6 weeks ago. Hung out everyday. Always felt like she was 1 foot in and 1 foot out. She says she has trust issues so I understood. Out of no where she cut communications with me down by A LOT and we haven't hung out in over a week. Night and day difference. My question for you is have you experience with this? I treat her very very well and she said I'm not like most guys. I haven't done anything wrong to her. Have you ever gotten to the point when you just wanna drop your bf? She's doing that to me except she doesn't want me gone because when I told her we shouldn't see each other anymore since she doesn't want to hangout she than told me she can't help it. She doesn't want me gone she just doesn't want to see me. Obviously it's impossible to have a relationship with someone who does that for a long period of time. If she's still doing this a week or 2 from now I have to leave. But I was wondering if you get like this?
NYCman sorry to hear that :/ well with BPD you go through some periods of shutting down i guess. You kinda push everyone away, unintentionally. Makes friendships and relationships harder. The biggest thing is to tell her she can take allthe time she needs and that youll be there for her. The mood swings and changing often is all part of BPD. She loves you im sure. Like me with my bf, sometimes ill end up like shutting down and sometimes ill snap at him but he knows im not trying to be that way.
I've been clinically diagnosed with BPD, and like you have found someone that really tries to understand and stand in my shoes. DBT was so incredibly boring and drawn out that I found myself consistently bored and zoning off somewhere else. Also to the uneducated comment that said something about having a lover and not complaining blah blah blah, did you not watch the video? Or have done research about the illness or are you just shootin' the shit? Someone can't heal your wounds for you, they can only support you the best way you can. Take robin Williams for example, he was loved by lots and he loved lots but in the end he took his own life because that's how bad it became. No matter the love or the support that he got, suicide was what he thought was the only way out. So next time, think about your dumb comments before you post and you make yourself look like a complete degenerate.
When I was a kid, my older brother sexually abused me. It went on for a while, I’m not sure how long, but I can remember many instances of it happening. Ever since I was around 11, I’ve been spiraling. Dealing with out of control emotions that caused me to act ‘crazy’ and lose many of my friends. I’ve been called dramatic, crazy, emotional, attention whore, more times than I can count. I wondered for six years what was wrong with me and when I researched BPD, it clicked. Thank you for this video. And anyone else who is dealing with this too- I respect you, and I’m here for you.
I was diagnosed with BPD and my boyfriend broke up with me. I never treated him badly and would always try to be happy around him so that he didnt have to deal with my problems. One day i couldnt take it anymore and i overdosed, when i came out of hospital, he broke up with me. It was the most pain i've ever felt in my entire life and i hope no one has to ever go through that.
I've been hospitalized several times before, and every time I was treated for BPD. I did lots of studying on DBT AND CBT and I use DBT everyday, I know that for sure. I think everybody can use some DBT, regardless of your emotional/mental health. It actually helps. On the discharge sheets they'd always write down BPD, and it's completely accurate for me. (They can't properly diagnose me because I'm under 18 but it must've been apparent) I also have OCD, which was more prevalent before the BPD started showing itself. I think more information needs to be spread about both disorders, cuz I hear people saying "Oh yeah I'm so OCD I always have to keep my room clean" or "I probably have BPD because I can't ever hold a relationship". These are very serious illnesses and they're not something to wear as an accessory, you know? It's not something to be "proud of". For me, the relationship part is the worst. Here's what it's like, stage by stage. 1. I meet someone and become infatuated 2. Will not leave them alone because they "make me so happy I never want them out of my sight" 3. I think my depression has gone away and my world has been fixed 4. I start finding a little thing that they could've done wrong, or come up with an ulterior motive for their friendship/relationship with me. 5. I drive myself so crazy thinking about some *tiny* thing they've said/done/haven't done that my heart explodes, right? I'm in constant distress. 6. I drop you. I block you. I leave things messy between us. 7. I can also just literally lose interest in you altogether, too. Skip 4, 5, and 6. That's what it's like. I'll stop blabbing now but for me that's the worst part of BPD for me. Thanks for reading if you got this far btw.
Reanna, The Creator I dont wanna make assumptions but i had a shit upbringing so i definitly qualify. As a teen i was most if not all those thing...and probally worse. TLDR i was out of control. After i escaped from a my long term stressors it did get easier tho. Not at first but after the initial meds and therepy hump i felt alot better. I still am a very eccentric person but these days most just say bi-polar not bpd. Even tho i frequently use DBT style techniques and if my stressors get bad enough i hallucinate to varying degrees. No comment on relationships tho workin on that. Im very cautious considering i one that caused my mind to shatter for a bit. Either way good news is those raging hormones as a teen dont help so it gets easier as an adult even if marginally. GL reguardless. BPD is usually caused by a long term trauma with some biological influences. Which is why you hear borderline-bipolar alot. My only advice is alot of the times you may feel pretty stable, but most might percieve otherwise. I got approval to try getting off meds but i dont reccomend it. I think i can manage mainly cause i figured out myself long before treatment a system to use my issues advantageously in a healthy manner. Then again im bipolar to could be different. Sorry for the long wall of txt gl to you reguardless.
Reanna, The Creator Oh also ps in a relationship not even just dating. I had that same issue. Your mind gradually completely flips your opinion of someone overtime. Mine went as far as to make complete bullshit up. They hate you, their cheating/disinterested, ect. Dont be afraid to ask your loved ones and friends questions. I might go. This is probally dumb but i think your mad at me cause...am i on the right path or is it unfounded? Or I think im having a borderline moment, but are you pissed at me? No? Ok cool. Generally those im closest to are willing to anwser. In a relationship the two hardest things are getting started and not forming an obsession. I obsess at first sight, then obsess about thinking how to fix a problem maybe only im percieving. Seriously communicate properly it helps. Its easier to play it off casual before it blows up. Finally for me at least the more i know a person the easier it gets. I have people where it rarely flares up if at all. PS all this being said partly due to PTSD problems, I have had very few intimate relationships. Ive yet to get comfortable on that lvl yet. Im also no expert just sharing my experiences...to me its less cliche than it gets better. K shutting up now.
Your steps for what happens in your relationships freaked me the hell out. That is EXACTLY what happens to me every time. I definitely have dysthymia and GAD but damn.
Reanna, The Creator I have a friend that does the same thing... she's like, "with the things I see, Im surprised im not schizophrenic" and she always (as much as I love her) annoys me when she acts like she's sooo depressed and something is really wrong with her. She thinks being like that is fine because it's _different_ . She is right about it being different. But it's not a good different at all. It's a terrible feeling. She acted like this especially after I had taken a personality test and my results for chances of having OCD and BPD were at very high. When she had taken it she had gotten low on all disorders on there, including schizoid and BPD. She was like, Im surprised, I thought Id get a high in both like you did. She always says this kind of stuff like she wants to be broken and demented. Meanwhile Im just wondering why? Why would you want to be considered that? It's just...terrible.
Anyone else with BPD experience extreme over sensitivity to emotions/energies... It feels like im in tune with all kinds of different energies all the time, espesially with people around, I can't control them and they make me SOO fckn tired.... And I'm a Guy so yeah , dating is practically fucked : (
For the people above and many other who will read this - guys it does get better. If you work on it it does. I didn't know whats wring with me and 2 therapist failed to diagnose me before it came all out, because I seem like a stable, strong, logical woman, but the strom inside...oh dear God it was so bad. My body has scars of deep cuts, I almost lost my left kidney as a result of drug abuse, my friends were heavily addicted and equally sick, my relationships were difficult and obsessive. But I never gave up guys I never accepted that this will be my life. I decided to fight to get better even if it takes all life. What helped me - well I have been with a few therapists, I red books, forums, watched videos and were sharing with friends. So first is share and get info. Then your brain will process it all in few years it will start auto correcting and slowly dropping some of the toxic patterns. Yes meditation and spirituality. Yes science and studies. Yes hardcore work of general self development - work and workouts, university, money and so on. Sport, loads of sport. Dropping the bad substances or be balanced with them. Using is one thing addiction and abusing is another. 1 step forward 2 steps back, then 2 steps forward and so on. For the last 10 years I walked a long, crazy and quite often difficult way. I had love and I had fun but also a lot of drama, tears and difficulties. You need closure with the people who caused his as well if there are such people. Last but not least - you may find another way as well. I tried many many things and some helped a lot others a bit. I am 28 now. I am have been single for the last 3 years on and off, but I now feel way more complete and happy than before. Symptoms are often back but I know what causes them and I let then shake me for a while then I shake them off :) I have my BPD and codependency more or less under control. I laugh. I have great job, I am successful. I have good friends and significantly better relationship with my parents. I have lovers and I know a special someone will one day stick around for good and this time I will be way more mature and ready to engage in a healthy and beautiful love, hopefully even have family and kids in parallel to my career. So remember WORK HARD AND TAKE YOUR TIME LIFE IS A RIDE WITH UPS AND DOWNS. IT DOES GET BETTER FOR US BPD AND CODEPENDENCY FOLKS. IT REALLY DOES GET BETTER
These always fail to mention that these illnesses and personality disorders can heavily vary from person to person. If someone lacks one criteria, it does not disqualify them from being valid. There is such a thing as a BPD without severe abandonment issues. Ik, almost unheard of apparently.
same. Videos like this is why people get misdiagnosed. Because i'm the quiet type, previous doctors would just label me as depressed and anxious. I'm glad my psychologist is looking deeper
I highly doubt I have bpd but it would explain the severe anxiety, violent mood swings, seeing myself as someone else, inability to form steady relationships, and stress leading to anger issues.🤷♀️
Belle St. John it’s so dangerous to self diagnose. Check out the criteria and if it fits, talk to a doctors. If you have a mental health illness you didn’t even consider and are convinced you have BPD without a diagnosis, it can be really unhealthy for your mentality. Good luck with whatever you choose to move forward with :)
@@blackfairyxdusy This is literally the farthest you can get from self diagnosis other than just not thinking about it. If shes considering the fact that she has BPD that means she relates to the video somewhat and if she relates to the video somewhat than its a miracle that she said anything at all. If no one had an idea of what disorder they had than no body would ever be getting help.
A major feature associated with BPD, not discussed in this presentation, is a phenomenon called "splitting." This is the coping mechanism where a person is not able to understand or recognize gray areas. Borderlines tend to see and react to the world in a good or evil dichotomy. One of my preceptors during my psych rotation shared an anecdote that helps me recognize a patient with BPD: He said when he gets a new patient who gives him the highest praise and tells him that he is the "greatest doc" or something along those lines, he says that he essentially braces himself for the eventuality of pissing off the patient... then all hell breaks loose and he becomes the "most horrible" doctor or something similar. This splitting is a result of, for example, a scenario where a parent (or primary caregiver) is loving, kind, warm... when they are sober but become severely abusive when drunk. In a hospital or work setting the BPD patient will often attempt to turn the entire staff against a nurse, psychiatrist or coworker who they feel has wronged them. One of the easiest ways to identify a borderline is this splitting. Essentially, they love you, love you, love you, until you challenge them or (in their mind) cross them. Then they hate you and make sure the rest of the world hates you as well. A key thing to remember when you find yourself as the object of this anger, is that you should take it personally, because the behavior is not about you, but they way the person copes with the world.
besides DBT, what would be the best therapy? i really need help, please suggest anything - books, articles, blogs. can't access dbt in india esp where i live. any help would be appreciated
I like this for the good summary and clarity. But I think you make a major mistake to divide the world in two species “the borderlines” and “the normals". It seems you are saying (because of that story) that everyone with this coping mechanism is one of “them” the borderlines and not one of “you” the normals. Well. I believe it is important to realize that BPD is a cluster of symptoms that often appear together but that can also appear independently and in different intensities. (I am also rephrasing what a therapist said). It is like saying everyone who self-harms or has some reckless habits, or flash backs, or an eating disorder is “a borderline” and by extension everyone who apologizes a lot or has creative talent. I could give examples of people who don't, but well, it is just an opinion anyway. Also it seems you think “they” (“we”, the borderlines) just happen to do that and hurt people like it is inherent to diagnosed individuals like a heart or a liver. The long and the short: I think I almost never did that openly since I’m older than 12. I am VERY emotional about someone somehow “crossing” me. But generally I have hard time “hating” people because personally I find each human reaction understandable. I take some time and think before making a choice. (Example. I am writing very detailed criticism because I can’t take not doing it, but not a fiber of me believes the author wants to hurt people.) It makes diagnosis more complicated when you are always friendly to your therapist but it isn’t impossible to meet enough criteria. Why do I bother? Yes I know I likely prove every cliché of a silly oversensitive BPD nutcase writing this novel. Yes I relativize, because I believe sometimes that is important for fairness. Yes I wish I could fully deny my diagnosis and I am in denial sometimes. But I learned that that too has a reason: self protection from inevitable pain. I think borderline is one of the most terrible “labels” you can put on a person. You require a variety of symptoms to “qualify”. Each symptom is obviously shitty. So what you do when you take one and then “diagnose” the person because of one flaw in their personality, is you accuse them of a whole array of mistakes. You put them in a group of individuals that is officially classified as manipulators (cluster B.) Sure that is good if it actually applies. However if people make isolated mistakes, draw your consequences from their mistakes- but don’t convict them for other behavioral crimes. In the worst case you can unecessarly hurt their self-image or reputation . (I believe it has a reason why there is a law to protect privacy and why psych can withhold diagnosis). I myself feel a bit disgusted each time I hear the diagnosis. Actually I can’t say how much. Knowing people are fair and think in a very differentiated manner on the hand, like most therapists (including the one who told me what I wrote in the second paragraph) helps. It doesn’t mean the “label” doesn’t have its place. Just be careful with it. I believe no one should suffer more than they need to. Again I am not hating on this comment. I just won’t repeat everything I agree on.
Achhantei Purkayastha - According to numerous research studies, DBT has proven to be the most effective type of therapy for BPD, followed by Mindfulness/Mentalization therapy. CBT is another useful therapy for this personality disorder, along with schema therapy. For DBT, Marsha Linehan authored an excellent self help book for BPD which teaches DBT and various mindfulness skills, including exercises and the whole 9 yards! I found it helpful and actually utilize many of the strategies taught in this DBT self help book (I suffer from BPD and major depression).
A lot of people are misdiagnosed I don’t listen to the docs anymore I’ve been misdiagnosed with many things over the last 20 years there is nothing wrong with us we just are seeing the wrong docs that don’t know what they see... my life isn’t perfect but I definitely do not have this, these psychologists think in a hour they can see that someone has BPD that’s so crazy...
I have lot of symptoms of BPD, I'm hyperemotive, I have an extremally strong need of affection/love, I need to talk a lot I almost allways feel alone, like if something was missing, it's very hard, I have some short periodes of depression (few hours/days), I have an unstabled vision of my self, I just know that I was diagnosed with "social anxiety"(strong) but I was 9 yo, today it's much less extrem, and I have "ADD" (ADHD-PI). But I was never diagnosed with BPD, but it's been 5 years that I haven't seen a psychologist / psychiatrist and I feel like I really want to see one again (I saw a psycholog about 6 months ago but just like 3-4 times maybe).
When I saw this video in my feed, I wanted to learn, so I clicked it. I related and looked into it with my therapist. I am now in group therapy with people going through the same thing and it has really helped me. Thank you, so much.
When I was younger and trying to figure out what was wrong with me (my parents didn't/don't believe mental illness is really a thing), I assumed I must have depression. And then I decided I definitely had anxiety. But, of course, I wouldn't tell anyone because I was unsure on how treatment worked and was afraid I was wrong and I didn't wanna tell people I had something I didn't actually have. I finally got the chance to go get some help a few years ago, and it seemed like everyone just kinda... treated me like an inhuman puzzle to solve or didn't actually care to talk to me for more than a few minutes before telling me I had said thing because they know best and sent me on my way with no explanation other than, "you probably experience these symptoms because of anxiety." Everything got pushed under the umbrella of "it's probably your anxiety." Then later on I got a psychiatrist who showed me that there's a big difference between good psychs and bad psychs. A BIG difference. He listened to me and actively tried to get deeper into things to really dig to the deep down answers, thoughts, feelings and behaviors. I didn't expect to be diagnosed with BPD. PTSD I can understand due to a couple... things, in my life, but BPD? I'd only ever heard of it once from a friend, who explained it as "a person who's mental illness causes them to be a jerk and treat people badly and they're really hard to get along with" and just kinda made people with BPD sound... awful. Then I met another person who's actually been diagnosed with BPD and this person is amazing and I love them so much and they've shared some things about BPD with me so I'm learning more about this thing that I have that no one else talks about. It's still mostly a mystery to me. I feel everything I study up on about it and it definitely seems to make sense for me to be diagnosed with it, but so many of the resources I've found have been really... vague. I was gonna close my laptop and go to bed because I'm super tired but I saw this video in the suggestions and was like, "wait, maybe I can find out something new about this thing I have." I hope I'm able to find more information. I imagine knowing a problem makes that problem easier to solve, or at least deal with.
I'm experiencing almost the same right now, I don't really know what's wrong with me. I've seen a therapist but it wasn't really a therapy cause my parents didn't want that. It would affect my job if I'd actually get medical treatment and they say that's not worth it. During summer break I realized again that something wasn't alright with me, but I didn't talk to my parents. They don't understand. They just care about me becoming a "normal" person. I'm planning on going to see a doctor as soon as possible, I want to break free from this, it doesn't feel right. I'm rather getting cured from mental illnesses and having problems with finding jobs than keeping my job (apprenticeship) and suffering from mental illnesses my whole life
My mind always changes all the time. I can't control my mind. It's like I don't want to do that but somehow I'm doing it. I don't wanted to feel that way, but somehow I pushed myself to feel that way. I am afraid to talk to people, because I'm scared that they will judge me. But I always feel like there's something more... I don't know if I have bpd? bipolar? Or any mental disorders. Because I don't think I feel the things that people with anxiety disorders do. But I always push myself to feel what people with anxiety feels. I know I'm being fucking dramatic, but I can't fucking stop it. I'm so tired over thinking nothing. I feel like my life was just a play, it all just a drama. I just can't fucking control my mind, inside I know I was doing it wrong, but somehow my body and my mind was just keep pushing me. I don't have anxiety, but sometimes I just push myself so that I can have anxiety. I am aware that I'm pushing myself but I can't stop it. And keep thinking it over and over again and it makes me so fucking depressed. I really don't know what's wrong with me, and I don't know who I cant talk to. Do you guys have any idea on my situation? Is there a term for it? I don't know what to trust anymore... Please help me.....
Lonely Vagabond I’ve been thinking my situation over and over and over for years, trying to figure out who and what I am. The causes of what made me the way I am and even more so, what my issues are. I feel very similar to how you do. My life feels as though I’m running on a crappy AI program while I watch from the sidelines, my body does and say whatever the fuck it wants no matter how desperately I don’t want to do it, I’m dealing with BPD and the actions and feelings I get from it, but at the same time I am self aware enough that I’m knowing when I’m doing it, it’s just no matter how much my mind screams and cries “please stop I don’t want to do this” my body does it anyway. There’s likely other mental illness mixed in there that do not like to be put together with BPD and that feeling is horrific. I can’t say that life will get better, that you’ll get a grip on things, that you’ll be able to control your actions or that voice inside your head that causes you to read a simple gesture as pure undying hatred, or everlasting love for you. But you aren’t alone in feeling that way, I may not have any myself as I’ve had to hide my feelings away from people especially my family and loved ones because whenever I reveal fragments of all of the dark emotional vortex inside my head it causes them to go into a depression of their own, which in turn worsens my condition significantly but I am aware that there are people out there who have the patience and the kindness to put love you throughout the painful times where no matter what they do you will feel as though you are all alone, and I’m sure you’ll find one one day. It’s been 9 months since your comment. Maybe you’ve found one already
@@tdmc6428 ,This is described very well! I'm the same, Oh mann hate life so much , especially the awareness while all these thing are happening holy shit, its though To read all these comments makes me feel less alone but still, I'm losing it ...
Wow u said a lot of things i couldn't find the words. I don't know who am i. I am almost 24.. it's sad to know that bpd isn't cureable. It's a battle we must fight i feel like i am going crazy!! Bpd is not easy.
marilyn gazelle I have exactly what the original comment described and is that considered bpd?? Sometimes I feel like I’m bipolar but I always feel like I’m just doing it to myself and don’t have any mental disorders
I suspect I have this, does anyone else experience the following? - when friends text back with a different vibe than usual, being less talkative, etc, I get paranoid that they like me less, so then I decide to cut contact with them for hours and I feel extremely sad and depressed about the ideas that I've convinced myself of. - I get paranoid that people are talking about me behind my back, or are planning to physically or emotionally hurt me in some way - I'm extremely bitter towards certain people (usually family or certain friends, not all friends, I am only like this with some), sarcasm comes out and I'm passive aggressive when I'm agitated. I feel guilty and make an effort to not do the same next time, but it happens anyways. - If someone doesn't respond to me within a few hours but I know they're online, I take it as they like me less, and I shut my phone off and ignore everyone. I don't know why I do this but that's what I do lol - when I get jealous or insecure of myself, I change things about my social media's such as mass-deletion of photos, etc to make my online image look better - I almost feel angry at myself for the way I look sometimes. I feel so pretty and amazing one day, and confident, but that feeling can change within an hour to feeling ugly, self loathing. I want to stop talking to everyone when I feel this way and sit on my bed and stare at a wall. - I sometimes ignore messages from people that care about me for hours because I feel annoying, insecure, or empty and depressed. - I get extremely jealous and convince myself that my friends will find better friends, end up disliking me, etc and this idea makes me start to dislike them and hate them, but then the next day (or when they respond to my text), I will feel completely fine. - My self image sometimes gets so bad that I don't speak to anyone or text anyone, and I often reject people because I feel like they just deserve someone prettier, etc even if I am pretty already. I feel depressed, like I want to cry and not talk to anybody, because they probably have better people in their lives anyways. Sometimes I feel worthless, in other words. - I get moods where I'm happy, feeling artistic and motivated and people notice it so much that they prompt me about it, for example "Wow, you're really happy today, what's going on with you?" and stuff like that. - I'm really muted with my positive expressions. I feel like I can't feel them properly or as well as most people - I am hesitant to be open with my mom. When I talk to her I feel like I have a natural guard up that makes it too awkward to show positive emotions, etc. My relationship with my mom and some friends of mine is like this, where I'm monotone, not very ecstatic, or passive aggressive. This one is hard to explain.
I got diagnosed over 15yrs ago and you just now shed light. Thank you so much for this. Really made me feel like I wasn't alone for once. Thank you! Thank You! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pity be to the person who falls for the complicated one the abused, and the mentally screwed Pity be to the person who thinks they can repair or show them how "real love" goes Pity be to the person who can't make the abused suffer as suffer they must in order to feel loved Pity be to the abused one who has trashed the good man in her search for the real love Many lifetimes were chanced and lost, when life's path itself disappeared and she sunk Into the red moon's lagoon Her message "I'm sorry", too late
You say pity about someone to show real love yet people with borderline personality think real love is fucking 2 people and hopping to the next and lying to people about it and their current relationship while the one who dont have mental disorders who had a loving family know what love is or even ones who went through abuse can learn and reconstruct on societal constructs and love fundamentals properly without excuses and manage awareness and morals.gtfo.
knoxy socksies I'm going threw the same thing I actually helped him with his bpd by going to his psych apt was by his side while he ranted and raved about no one understanding him and loving him the reason why I left was because he was lying and saying he was getting help for his issues instead he dumped me and hooked up with someone else the cruelest part of it all was the way he confessed it on the phone we were talking about everyday things his whole attitude changed and that's when he dumped me I didn't deserve that I was with him 5 years well at least now I know and I'm able to slowly regain my life back it will take time You will feel better
sgdfg I know BPD people, including myself, who would never cheat on anyone and stay loyal to their partner because they're terrified of feeling abandoned and rejected. I used to be like what I just said myself until I found that one person who I knew I will always love even if we broke up a while back. There will always be bad bits from a collective but that shouldn't negate the existence of others.
sgdfg That's not at all accurate. Borderlines do feel real love and many borderlines don't hurt anyone at all. It sounds like you were hurt by a borderline and I'm sorry you were, but that doesn't give you the right to stigmatize an entire illness. You need to realize that most borderlines are not like the one who hurt you.
I was in a relationship with a girl with borderline personality disorder. It was the most traumatic experience of my life. She’d go back and forth between telling me I was her everything to telling to kill myself and that I was worthless. I showed her so much empathy through everything and now I feel like I’ve lost the ability to empathize altogether. Eventually I managed to get out of the relationship, but the memories still haunt me. I remember how careful I had to be with every single word I said, fearing that she’d get upset and abuse me. I remember the ways she devalued me. It was torture. I know that not everyone with BPD is like this, but please, if you’re in a relationship with someone who is mistreating you the way I’ve described, don’t make the same mistakes I did. Take care of yourselves and don’t let people abuse you 💕
I fear this is how my fiance thinks of me. It's very rough but in the end we know what we are doing to our loved one. If we truly love them then we will try to get help to stop belittling them but if it is that episode it is very hard controlling how i am since i fully have no control
shlump mommy I apologize if it felt like I was demonizing people with BPD in any way, I genuinely empathize with people who have it. I just wanted to share my story to anyone going through something similar. It took a lot for me to end up in the position I was in with my ex partner, and I genuinely don’t believe we would’ve ended up there if she had been interested in taking an objective look at her own behavior. You don’t seem to share that quality and trust me when I say that would have gone a very long way for me.
Giovanni its comforting to know that others have experienced bullying as a part of it developing, was bullied way too much mixed with home problems you start to hate everyone naturally.
N.W.A /IceCube I was picked on a lot to my brother would beat me up and punch me and when I would cry he would punch me more and harder in the face telling me to stop crying and he said he bullied me for all these years to make me tougher but in reality it ruined my life I was bullied in school and outside of school at my house a place that is suppose to be a safe haven until my self esteem was crushed and I had to move and lost all my friends making me even sadder until I couldn’t focus on school and my parents are divorced and one is in the military and I would cry as my military family Member was in war and my other significant parent was a alcoholic and I never had help with things I don’t understand like Home work and they both seemed to care about relation ships more than their kids until finally it took its toll the sadness of my life until I dropped out and ever since my life has been screwed not being able to find a job and being financially broke and not being able to afford a education to receive or get a job to fully relying on said parent as a adult and all I can do is drink and become a alcoholic myself welcome to life pain and suffering followed by what might be more pain and suffering if religions are right . And then after all these years of not living with my military parent I finally do live with them and we’re all broke I have no money for things I can’t even get medication because I have to pay some one that acts like they care a hundred bucks rather than medicine that cost 30 bucks but hey America is the best country in the world as the amount of secrecy in USA is amazing and I don’t know why my parent went over to a place for freedom moment to pay bills for what ? a sad world indeed but hey as the world deteriorates use your selfi sticks for duck faces .
This is really accurate. I have BPD and have all of these symptoms and it's really hard to deal with and explain but this video sums it up in 3 minutes! Thanks a lot for the update!
Sometimes it can be a long and painful way to go to try to find where your trauma originate from. For my part i only discovered it a couple years ago. And it literally makes me depressive. I have to say that i self diagnose, which only makes things harder. But now im at peace with that part of my life (i have cut the links with the peoples who were responsible of it, was hard to do but totally worth it.) i hope for you that you can find if it’s really what you’re looking for and that you’re ready for it.
After months of suspecting this, I got the diagnosis by my therapist a month ago. I was in awe, I used to think I was just a little over the top with my emotions, but all clicked & made sense.
thatcringey person For any concern, you should seek a doctor/psychologist for an accurate diagnosis. Some symptoms can easily be mistaken for other illness.
Oh boi... I love people who generalize. :D Blame countries because of one! Blame a race because of one! Blame a community because of one! It's so fair, right?
i have BPD and it breaks me to say it I dont wanna talk i just wanna say for the people suffering with BPD, is i love you so much.And you might think its bullshit to love some i dont know so much but i do and it makes my heart hurt to know that there is others feeling how i do. Im not here thinking you are just gonna get better form my useless word but they're are not useless because i really feel the pain that everyone is feeling through my heart so im gonna say this one more time. I love you, i dont know you but i love everything about you, you make me smile and cry and laugh without ever talking to you.It's hard to think that im not alone and that it's people who suffer like i do but there is and i love them for living everyday and smiling even when your unhappy and and loving without being able to feel all the love you get everyday.I love you even if you have a different face of name of love life of style everyday, hour, minute, or second. You could shoot me in the back and my love wouldn't stop. please smile? for me please??
@@godsgood9030 I understand the pain is real, and excruciating, but I hope we could encourage each other. Oh ... btw, I move away from the cause, yeah I decided to break up. Its 3 days torturing tho. I can’t eat and function normally. Only curled up fetus like. Cried n cried. And on the day 4. I met an “angel” in a comments section. We encourage each other, we check each other. And 2weeks after that I felt okay. Its not your BPD is the problem. Its our choice of unavailable partner that tortured Us. I’ve been cried and emotionally tortured for 10months. Now I’m gratefull I free my self from the trigger.
@@Biscochito_ yeah after 4 months i gave up.I let go of what i thought my soul mate was 2 months ago and im not gonna lie .I WAS THINKING OF BACKSLIDING.but instead i cut everyone off and started new.And now im a crazy cat/plant lady. ig im glad but maybe im not
Starscream91 you don't know the half of what I've been through. just because ive been in a few relationships, it doesn't equal to life happiness. my last relationship was physically and mentally abusive. sex doesn't have anything to do with anything.
To everybody here struggling with Borderline Personality Disorder... I have BPD, too. I was destructive, manipulative, angry... every stereotype of BPD there is. Finally, I was willing to try medication. After finding the most effective combination of antidepressants and mood stabilizers, I finally had an even-enough-keel to try treatment. Even though I was resistant, I sat through Dialectical Behavior Therapy for a year. Then one day it all clicked. I continued with Dialectical Behavior Therapy for four more years. I am proud to say that my 8 year anniversary of my last self-harm attempt is next week and I've been free from therapy for four years. Now I have loving, stable relationships and am a productive member of society, no longer leaving a path of destruction in my wake. Sometimes my symptoms bubble up, but I am able to deal with them in healthy and effective ways, and can keep myself from spiraling. I understand the pain, the turmoil, the destruction. I understand the satisfaction, the ups and downs, the adrenaline from the back and forth. I get it and I'm telling you that you can get better. Please don't listen to the people telling you you're evil and shouldn't reproduce. Try not to listen to the people reinforcing all the horrible things in your head. I know it's difficult to believe, but they are wrong. There is hope and there is healing if you are willing to put your pride aside and surrender to treatment. I know we love the mess (or at least I found comfort in it), but it's so much better when you get help. Just remember, as long as you keep waking up in the morning, you'll be okay. You're not alone in the way you feel and what you experience. You can heal and lead a wonderful life full of loving relationships. Hang in there
My uncle has bpd. When I used to live with him, he was always afraid that I would leave him. He was afraid of bieng alone. It was very difficult to talk to him. People with bpd see the world split. In a good way or in a bad way. My uncle often would say that people were out to get him. And he's been suicidal too. He would be angry with me, even though I didn't do anything wrong. For example, one day I cleaned the house and he complained that it was still dirty and ended up abusing me. He would often abuse drugs. He would use that to cope with it. And my uncle can't keep relationships very long. He would leave them. Because"I'm not good enough" He stopped going to therapy. Which made it worse. He took out his anger on me. He took advantage of me. He raped me. And I can't forget that. We were so close. That's why I encourage people to see a therapist if there not feeling well. I can only do so much. I'm not a therapist. But however, we can reach out for our loved ones. Because they are important regardless what they've been through.
Anaya It sounds to me that he is just a terrible person using his emotional issues as a scapegoat for treating people badly. If indeed he is suffering from a mental disorder then he should be kept out of society and away from people he can harm. He is a dangerous and abusive person.
Edupz No. I don't live with him anymore. Thank God I don't. He's in jail. But for me, I now have ptsd. I have nightmares about him, and sometimes I feel suicidal. But I'm getting help though. So I feel a little bit better.
Thank you so much for having such good information, my girlfriend was diagnosed with BPD and this video helped me a lot to understand what she's going through, now a lot of things about her behavior make sense
I'm crept out for myself while watching this. I saw myself. I remember that my therapist thinks that I'm on the borderline because of the things mentioned in this vid. She had me journal my thoughts, and I did. It felt like a conversation of two, and I as a listener/spectator. So we're like three. I can hear them, not audibly. But inside my head. Sometimes, I speak the dialogues out. I asked my therapist if I have split. She changed tone of speaking and just told me to not think about it as of the moment. I became so doubtful of myself since she told me that. But hey, good news, I'm self-harm-free for 10months now 😊
I'd recommend looking into DID. It's often misinterpreted as BPD and/or schizophrenia. I thought I had BPD or schizo for a long time and I see myself in your comment.
I have Borderline since I am 8 or 9 and every year far to my 15th birthday it got worse. I had many Suicide attempts, was hurting myself everyday for years, lying to all my loved ones just to get their attention, stalked or threatend the ones I fell in love with, ruined multiple of my friend- or relationships and then lived in almost total isolation. Once I was in a hospital for mental illnesses and the therapist told me I will never be able to have a normal, loveing relationship and you know? She was right. I never experienced someone who was able to deal with me or Borderline for longer than 1-2 years. I got quite better after many years but I know Borderline will never go away. I just can learn how to live with it without getting my life destroyed again.
Your therapist told you that? I don't believe it. Nonsense. Many people even with severe BPD/MI find happy healthy relationships. Look to God to help you manage MI and better yourself, love, and believe that there very well may be someone out there who can handle your MI and will love you beyond it.
Spend a long time studying what healthy relationships are like and what healthy boundaries are. Persistence, patience, and determination CAN and WILL reduce your BDP. You are NOT broken, you have a poor internal foundation which CAN be fixed
Mau Chan Unbelievable. I don’t understand how is that person are consider qualified to be a therapist. Absolutely wrong. There are a lot of people with BPD that are able to form a loving relationship.
I struggle with BPD, and this video really helped me explain my condition to my friends and family. It's helped me become closer with them and has made life a little bit easier for me. Thank you for making this video. :)
ok so I have listed about 6 of these that I relate to: - unstable relationships and images of people - unstable sense of myself - very highly changing moods - feeling very empty - stressed and paranoid almost always - I feel cut off and view the world through a view as if it were a dull first person game now I don't know if this means I have it but I'm a teenager and probably stupid and don't know what I'm saying but I'm kinda scared to ask my parents about it because they'd probably brush it off as an overreaction and joke about it 2 years from now saying "haha remember when he thought he had bpd oh you were so overreacting, honestly"
Same I also feel that way like I have the same symptoms and I'd really like to get it checked out but I'm also too scared to ask my mom because I don't want her to make fun of me or say something like "why would you have it?". I hope you are able to ask your parents if you can get it checked it out and if you do have it I hope you get the help you deserve for it!
@@amyriley878 My advice is not to bottle emotions up. From experience, it is the worst thing you can do. Not talking to someone can be fatal. I know advice from a rando on the internet won't mean much but I implore you to talk to someone you trust if you feel depressed or in any state of anxiety.
I'm always 'the weird one'. My family and my friends say that I'm differnet, 'unique' and that I'm 'still trying to find myself'. My mum once said 'You enjoy being different, right?! You like getting attention' and that was really hurtfull. I can relate to everything in this video, I think that I have BPD and I'm afraid that everyone is going to think I'm crazy. I'm afraid that I'm going to think I'm crazy
After a 4 year struggle of misdiagnoses, today I finally saw a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with BPD. I didn’t understand anything about it and everything he told me went in one ear out the other, I was so in shock I couldn’t pay attention. This video helped me so much understand better on what BPD is and how I can try to help myself. Thank you so much 💕
PsycHoe730 I have the same. But my boyfriend really loves me. I went away few times while I was with him, I've also tried to hurt him so much. I said that I didn't love him and worst things then I left. But he tried his best to find me in the city. He did. And now we're still together thanks to him. He knows my problem and I'm having a therapy to slove that, for him. I hope you'll find someone as I did. I've lost almost everyone around me because of that but it's going better since this year
You'll find someone that's perfect for you and understanding, I was diagnosed with BPD and my last relationships were very complicated, they thought i was dramatic and always overreacting, they couldn't understand why i was so over emotional and why i would act the way I would, but i luckily found a perfect man who even though didn't know what BPD was before he met me, tries to understand me and is very patient, not judgmental and helps me through a lot, i'm very thankful to have him in my life because Being with a person who has BPD isn't the easiest thing, so do not worry, you'll find someone who will accept you, and who will love you for who you truly are
Me too but I've sort of basically imposed a "Single pringle" life on myself because I don't think a relationship is right for me at the moment (get on it reddit and make "vocel" a thing!) It's not because I don't want a boyfriend but my perception of myself is too warped and unstable right now.. It wouldn't be right to make someone else have to deal with my excess baggage atm.
I have borderline personality disorder.. It sucks and I have my days where I just wanna just curl up and give up but I know I'm better than that and its easier for me to resist urges when I understand my own disorder. I did recently overcome addiction as well. Its been over 60 days and in going good. But just know... You arent alone.
Good luck...stay focused on this understanding and loving path for yourself and the world..youre very brave to have overcome addiction! :)) I also suggest doing mindfulness meditation and walking..
This explains a whole lot about why I am the way I am but I'm not gonna be able to find out if I have this because I cant go to psychologist so that 🤷♀️
I’m happy you made this video because I had a doctors appointment today and even though I’m only ten I’m diagnosed with BPD and I just wanted to make sure that I was and now that I’ve watched this it’s made me realise how angry depressed and mournful I get.
I am coming back onto this video to comment. I am not entirely sure if this was the exact video I saw though since there are multiple videos about BPD on this channel. Anyways, the video that I watched (years ago) happened to be on my recommendations page. I used to watch this channel often because I am interested in psychology and the videos are very informative. I was watching the video and I realized that I related to every single thing said. I brought it up to a therapist a few months later and BAM I actually do have it. If it were not for this video I would have felt more alone and wouldn't have gotten help for this. I am very grateful.
TRIGGER WARNING: Assault and other terrible things. When I was 11 I experienced a series of pretty traumatizing events that all derived from the same man. Miles, a 20 year old man. From my first encounter, I knew he would become a figure of terror in life. I didn't even know him until there were rumors of him between groups of us neighborhood kids. Stories of him stalking and scaring people seemed taboo. Until something worse happened to me. Riding around my neighborhood on my bike was something I had begun to do in my 11th year of living until he made his first appearance. Running up to my bike and violently grabbing the handle bars so I couldn't pedal away whilst asking me desperately for my number was how he decided to start our depressing relationship. Of course, being 11, I declined. He kept on and on and I began to get scared, people were watching and the guy still had the audacity to continue his begging. I began to cry. He stopped his ranting to me and asked me if I was scared, to which I said yes. He leaned in and grabbed me as I tried to push him away, that's when a group of guys about 16 began to yell at him to stop, screaming "It's just a little girl! Leave her alone!" I was shaking violently, clearly having some sort of a panic attack, sadly it wouldn't be my last from this guy. My second encounter with my new buddy was when I had just literally crawled out of a ditch. Whilst I was walking down the street to my friend who had gotten help for me I happened to look up. Locking eyes with the guy who made me cry. I told my friend to get away from him as he was about to cross the street to get to us. I screamed something along the lines of "GET AWAY OR I'LL CALL THE POLICE!" He stopped a moment to consider this and me and my friend began to walk in the opposite direction, thinking he'd leave. I look over my shoulder to see him full on sprinting at us. I shove my friend and scream run and she takes off. Me, being soaking wet in blue jeans wasn't able to get far and I had to watch my friend run away from me and the man. I heard his footsteps behind me as I struggled to run. (May I mention that it's broad daylight and we are screaming on an open street. Nobody opened their doors. Nobody.) I turned to throw my shoes at him as a last resort but they didn't hit him at all. In fact, he took his time to pick them up. I had run up to someone's front door and was banging on it crying, "PLEASE LET ME IN, PLEASE!" Nobody came to the door. He was significantly closer and I was forced into the corner of the entrance of this house that had no inhabitants. I looked to my left to see the still running figure of my friend, I was crushed. I began to shake again as he got closer to me, trying to block me from the view of it all. His right hand on the left side of my head, as to block me in. Let me just say that his face had absolutely no expression. There was no emotion, as though his eyes were glazed over. I began to cry as he asked me questions softly "What's your name? How old are you? Where's your phone? Can I have your number?" All this was happening as I sobbed and begged him to leave me alone. He didn't ever respond, he only asked me the questions over and over again. I can remember him saying "I know you. I know your name. I know you have a phone so give it to me." His questions fell on deaf ears as I cried louder. He asked me again if I was scared to which I cried saying yes. His hand that was next to my head reached down to my arm and pressed the fingernails into my skin to the point I thought I'd bleed. I can't even begin to describe the dread I felt as I watched his face looking intently into my eyes as he watched me cry harder now because of the pain he was inflicting on me. He tried to lean in for who knows what but I finally managed to push him away. He freaking asked "Why don't you want me to touch you?" Anyways, when he was done watching me cry and shake he backed away and apathetically said "Goodbye." Cue my 3rd encounter. I was riding home from school with my older brother when I saw the sidewalk had wet cement and so I went to it to draw a heart. My brother just wanted to get home and continued on. I glanced to my left to see my brothers head being slammed into his handle bars as he tried desperately to kick the man pinning him down. Guess who the man was? Miles. His arm was dramatically raised over my brothers head with what looked like a stick. I began to scream bloody murder at Miles which stopped him for a moment, enough for my brother to kick him and pedal off. I immediately went after him and we got home safely. But Miles had also walked to our house and was looking through the windows. I was in the back room shaking violently and crying my eyes out. "WHY WONT HE LEAVE US ALONE?! HES GOING TO KILL ME!" Long story shortened, some guy in a truck saw the whole thing and the police were called. They showed up very quickly, thankfully. When I looked out my window at the array of police cars that littered the street, I saw him. Sitting on my curb in front of my house petting my cat. I just wanted him gone, I didn't want to see him ever again but I continued to watch. A police woman comes up to him and asks if he has any weapons. He says yes, pulling up his shirt to reveal, not only one, but two 6 inch fillet knives. Turns out the thing over my brothers head was a knife. I cried again. I was so tired of feeling so broken by this guy, I just wanted him in jail or somewhere else. I watched him get in a police car and drive away. "It's okay." I thought. "He's gone now." But, he came back to his house about a couple days later. "He's insane. We can't arrest him. It wouldn't be fair. We can't put him in an asylum against his will." That's what the police said. Guess what else they said. I can't get a restraining order, "he's ill, it's not right." I digress, in conclusion, he knows where I live and my only option, as provided by the police, was to move. Anyway. I began having bpd after these events. I'm scared of too many things now. And somewhere deep down inside, I feel as though I'm going to die by his hand. I still live in that house, in that neighborhood in that territory that he stills walks. Thank you for your time reading this. One day I'll feel better or something. Who knows, really.
Delaney Renee That is so not right,how can they not do smth when you are in such danger? I hope everything goes well for you honey,I have a similar situation from when my father is drunk so I understand.When he is a little girl personality comes out and she hides,cries and shakes violently(I have DID).Thank you for sharing your story,I hope things will go better for you♥♥♥
Delaney Renee I'm so sorry. That man was absolutely deranged and you did not deserve to be in that situation. The police should have arrested him, or put him in an asylum. If you can't move then it's just going to cause more havoc. I'm so sorry, you poor thing
Re nee it's stories like this people need to hear about people with bpd. They need to realize that we more often than not have been through TRAUMATIZING events that led us to become this way, instead of just shaming us.
Was married to a diagnosed bpd. Super abusive physically and emotionally. Even told our families that I was abusive to her after I left and then denied doing so even after I sent her a text she sent to my mom saying just that. Gas lighting to an extreme, pretty much all of the stuff about reckless spending/sex was true about her...just an impossible situation
jn6305 Im in the process of leaving my wife Because of the exact same reason I was starting to get scared :( and i feel so bad for having to leave her Because I truly love her but it cannot go on we were both destroying ourselves ;( it hurts horribly to leave her
BPD is often misdiagnosed constantly and given wrongly to people who actually have other mental health issues. She sounds more like someone with ASPD if she is both physically and emotionally abusive, gaslighting and impulsive. Even though impulsivity is a BPD trait it's a common trait in sociopaths, bipolar, people with adhd and other mental illness where impulsivity is a big problem.
FaktFitness I also went through utter hell with one of these types. I lost everything, my children, my family, my home. These are are very dangerous indivuduals who care little about the devastation they leave in their wake.
After I had received my full diagnosis, my psychiatrist sent me this channel. It’s helped my family and even myself understand the disorders I deal with.
The horse taetae rode in hwarang *BTS trash* The best thing you can do is make it clear you're there for them and that you like them for who they are... when I'm depressed I feel like I'm burdening everyone around me and push people away as to not be a bother. Sometimes I just really need to be reminded that despite my mental disorders and depression and all there's always someone there for me and that I'm not burdening everyone around me. If they need to vent be the ear they need, but if not make it clear they don't have to, and I've found when I'm depressed I just need a distraction from my self deprecating mind. I'm probably just rambling by this point, but I hope I am of some help to you ^^
There isn't a right or wrong answer, but you can always try to get them to talk things out, and if possible see if they would like to consult a professional depending on the degree and problems.
The horse taetae rode in hwarang *BTS trash* Talk with him/her. Try to understand. Tell how much you care about him/her. Depressed people usually want to hear "I love you" "I care about you". And never ignore or leave him/her. That hurt's.
A girl I knew in high school had such server BPD and bipolar disorder that she only existed in either happy giddy or suicidal depression. She also had panic attacks just being in choir.
I was recently diagnosed with BPD, and they gave me a bunch of wrong diagnosis, like bipolar disorder, manic depression, severe anxiety, reactive attachment disorder, and a bunch of others
Universal Flower not necessarily Bipolar *Type I* is manic depression but Bipolar usually refers to Bipolar *Type II* which is more aggressive and deluded than depression
Got diagnosed with BPD 3 years ago and since then have been in DBT, can say it really helps a lot. What gets frustrating the most is having people try to say I dont have BPD but I'm Bipolar. Both conditions have so many related symptoms but the major ones with being Bipolar, I dont show nor do I genuinely feel I show them.
@Alyxendrr Paezaneo how the fuck do you know that? You don't know this person whatsoever. And while self diagnosing is dumb, it doesn't mean they don't have it.
I REALLY REALLY need to go to the doctor and get a therapist... This is really like me I suddenly change from happy, to suicdical or to mad from happy I just get temper alot and I cry because I think my life is the stupidest worst thing ever
Despite all the videos on BPD that i’ve watched. I still find it hard to comprehend. It’s way to similar to bipolar but more frequent? The symptoms are also too minor that there isn’t really one big deciding factor to confirm BPD. So far what i’ve got is abandonment issues, black and white perspective, and worthlessness. They’re the big symptoms.
The issue is that BPD is one of the most situational and odd personality disorders due to the fact it changes quickly and rapidly, it’s like bipolar in the regard that it can go up and down. But the main difference is that Bipolar is often consistent whereas BPD isn’t. Also notably missing in the video are the two types, outward BPD which is when you often violently express the lows you feel or the highs you get. And inward BPD where you direct that energy more towards yourself rather than people around you; making it elusive but it still puts a strain.
I have this thing guys. I got diagnosed with it two years ago. I live in Russia and nearly no-one knows about this illness here. I was lucky enough to find a nice specialist who figured out what it was. Usually bpd is mistaken to be bipolar disorder and lots of patients are constanly receiving sedative drugs so they won't be too active and won't hurt themselthes. In my country mental ilnesses are not considered to be something serious until you start hurting someone else apart from yourself and that is really scary. I wish there would be more videos like this in English and Russian for people to finally realise how hecking hard it is to live when you can't control your own emotions. Thank you for your job, keep it up!
Follow-up studies consistently indicate the diagnosis of BPD is a chronic condition, although the number of individuals who continue to meet diagnostic criteria slowly decreases over the life span.
Al yami Saleh Well I've been diagnosed for about 5-6 years, but I think I developed at a young age. I'm still working on managing myself constantly through therapy and meds. There's not really a way of being "cured", as is the case with most mental illnesses, but therapy is usually what helps you learn to live life peacefully
Some disorders are temporary, some are not, it all depends. Also anyone can get them at any time. Kinda like cancer, they can be controlled, or go into remission. In some sense mental disorders can't be cured in the same way that physical health problems can't be cured. You can only treat causes and symptoms.
Happy Sunday everyone! One of your previously requested a topic on BPD? We just recently finished it and have it released. Hope it helps those who are suffering from it or want to raise awareness about BPD. Also, we set up a shop to promote our digital magazines that we have been working on. The magazines aim to raise awareness on various mental health and psychology themes. If you like to help support us, you can grab a digital bundle here: iheartpsychology.myshopify.com/collections/frontpage/products/psych2go-magazine-1-4-adhd-mental-health-substance-abuse-social-anxiety-digital
Psych2Go this video was needed.
@dyling inside, hope it helped! @FutureVortexGaming, you mean like the benefits of gaming or why people play games?
Yeah can you make a video about the effects of music on your mood or emotions?
I have been told two things about BPD. Firstly women are more often diagnosed with BPD instead of a stronger or more destructive mental disorder because shrinks don't want to diagnose women with more severe personality disorders. Secondly I hear that many shrinks use the BPD diagnoses as a substitute for Narcissistic Personality disorder so they don't scare off their patient cause many that suffer with NPD will reject that diagnosis if given to them outright so treatment for their NPD is done under the moniker of BPD so the shrink can give them the help they need. That's what I have read about BPD at least...... I have an ex. She kidnapped our son a few years back... I know where he is now but it was a long court fight and my own investigation that found her and him. For his birthday she took him to an animal range... I asked her to take lots of pictures and videos. So she posted selfies of herself on her face book. Shes been legally Diagnosed BPD but she is every bit of NPD.
Do you have a video about Dissociative Identity Disorder? I think I have that illness :(. I've read a lot of articles about it.
Sorry for my bad English 😅
Should I go to a specialist? I don't want to get locked away :(
I have this, makes me want go from feeling invincible, to suicidal.
sounds like Bipolar Disorder, it seems like these mental conditions share symptoms
Masibulele Mampofu, Maybe but with Bipolar these high and low mood swings happened in weeks, while for people with BPD such as myself they happen hour to hour.
@@spiritedrenee9895 feelings of invincibility are indicative of Bipolar I, which is often what BPD patients are initially misdiagnosed with. However, we don't have manic episodes like that. Mania is serious, but not part of BPD. I encourage you to speak to a psychologist for diagnosis and treatment, especially if you feel suicidal.
Hope you're hanging in there
Me toooo ahahhahahaha
Wait wait... Most epic comment :))
I feel that though...
"... But remember that these with BPD are still people and deserve to be loved."
... Thank you...
No!
I second that thank you
what the fuck do you mean by "no"?
Nearly cried when she said that lol damn this bpd!
KlausDoitschlaaand The fuck do you mean by no...? asshole.
Emptiness
Depression
Dissosciation
Fear of intimacy and making relationships
Obsessive and paranoid
Low self esteem
Usually when I’m in a place where I get 100% positive feedback and agreement from others all those traits go away hahahhaa it’s rare to find such an environment tho, cuz I ward people away with my odd ways and stuff
@@floofyliu8819 welcome to the squad
I have 5 out of 6. I dont feel emptiness in a long time lol
Same
Totally define me
I can go from being introverted to extroverted,having a big ego or weak and low self esteem. im not sure if this is normal
That seems like your bipolar
Seems fairly normal. It happens to all of us
Therapy is a good thing for anybody no matter whats going on
same, people keep asking me if im bipolar but idk if i am XD
You should talk to a psychologist if you feel like it's affecting your life in a negative way.
I dated someone with BPD. I still love her. And I have a lot I’d like to say.
While many people with BPD welcome therapy, many others don’t want to try it. But at their lowest lows, they often desperately need therapy. It's extremely tough, both for them and for those around them.
When they want to try meeting with a psychologist experienced in treating BPD, there is hope.
They do have unbelievably strong emotions and attachments, which makes them so incredibly alive. To be their partner, you have to know what makes them happy and everything that makes them upset, how to speak with them when their mood swings, and how to love them the way they need to be loved. Stick through it, and you will be rewarded with intense love. They're beautifully broken souls. They're difficult to date. At some point they'll turn on you no matter how good you are. But don't miss the beauty buried inside them. The pain that has largely defined them also softened their hearts and gave them empathy like no other. They feel the world like an extension of their body. They're in touch, connected, and so alive.
Though having it is certainly not your fault, BPD sucks, like being cursed. No denying that. But it's also a gift. Deep empathy, a kind heart, and deep love are priceless.
Mentally those with BPD have a voice in their head suggesting that they are not loved and they are worthless. If you have or think you have it, I'm talking to you now. In time, you can befriend that awful voice. That voice is not the voice of self-hatred but the voice of fear, and fear can keep you alive. Fear is a powerful motivator to make immediate changes. On the other hand, it can also be a powerful motivator to stagnate or regress to something more familiar, even if it harms you. But let's go way back to the teachings of Aristotle and try this: One healthy way to live is the 'golden middle way' - a balance of excess and deficiency. You don't like it, and it's not your fault that you're in this situation, but you do have the voice of excess giving you excessive fear. That is a vice, but that is okay because you have another vice that everyone can have, and that is cold, hard reasoning. You can come to the truth and make good decisions by listening to both honest, logical reasoning and the voice suggesting, "He hasn't bought me flowers or anything for a month so he probably doesn't love me anymore." The feeling represents something real, in this case a desire for more expressions of love. But it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. And he probably did buy you ice cream or something the other day, but your emotions frequently are overwhelmingly consuming. I know communication can be really difficult sometimes, but just tell your partner, instead of bottling it up as anxiety and sadness, "I wish you'd buy me more things - just small affectionate things so I'm reminded you really care." I'm sure they would oblige. I know I would. :)
Mentally BPD is a confusing maze, a torture chamber, and your own personal devil telling you to think and act on impulse, but I believe that with honest and upfront communication (a lot of it) with your partner, it doesn't have to be a problem. And if you can accept it and embrace it as a tidal force in your life that you can't avoid, then you can learn to surf over those waves instead of getting battered by them. You can't control them, but that's fine. Let them flow under you as you surf on top of them. Yes, I know it's easier said metaphorically than done, but it can be done. And when you do, BPD might no longer be a curse, allowing you to keep only the gift.
For the most part BPD is treatable, thanks to something called DBT, but if and only if individuals with BPD decide for themselves that they would benefit from some professional help. For some people with BPD, especially those comorbid with NPD, that usually takes a near-death experience I've read, but maybe - just maybe - someone with BPD reading this can really hear me and understand when I say that I'm not telling you to change who you are. BPD has become a part of you, and change is scary. I'm just letting you know that people can help you grow. Growth never hurts anyone; it brings me daily happiness. With a little professional help, all that has defined you remains, and now people with lots of training can offer you new tools and new perspectives. Get an official diagnosis if you have not already, and formally begin this next stage of your growth. For anyone diagnosed with BPD who knows they aren't doing okay, it's worth it.
I'm not a trained psychologist, but I just want everyone to be at their best, and in control of their lives. No one should feel like they're along for the ride of their own lives. Sometimes we all need a little push to get going again, and that's why I'm here. We're all strong enough to take control. At least I believe that.
Larry Panozzo thank you, this makes me feel like less of a monster. I wish more people were as understanding as you.
god bless your beautiful soul baby, you made me cry and you gave me hope. never change
god… that was life-changing and really quite beautiful. wow. that was really really beautiful, thank you for writing that
Vampira, greto, and louise -
You're all very welcome. Happy to bring a little bit more meaning and beauty into your lives. It's kinda what I live for haha.
I edited the end of my comment a bit more as well.
Hope you all have a lovely rest of your week.
If you have any questions for me, I'm happy to chat.
I'd like to leave you with a quote from one of my favorite movies.
"What I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart. I love you."
Larry Panozzo "beautifully broken souls"
Hold on I'm stealing that quote xD
Why do people think that people who are diagnosed with bpd are assholes?
I am officially diagnosed and most people tell me that I'm one of the most kind and giving people they ever met. My boyfriend says that I can be pretty tough to handle at times, but that will never change the fact that I'm an incredibly nice person 99% of the time.
Yes, I make mistakes and I am able to hurt people who are close to me, but I always feel incredibly guilty.
I'm not an asshole just because I was diagnosed with a personality disorder.
Don't ever judge people you cannot understand. You don't know how it feels like living in hell.
Same it sucks how I'm judged on my multiple illnesses which include bpd its upsetting but I know I'm genuinely a good person who's trying every day
Exactly why I don't tell people. I try to compensate by buying coworkers cookies and other treats as often as I can afford, compliment people, pretend to be cheerful by saying "hi" to everyone coming in for the next shift, and donate to charity. We had a silent auction at work for Relay for Life. I handmade some stuff for it and even bid on things. I heard we are having another at the end of the summer so I am spending a huge amount of time drowning myself in making new stuff for it, but I tend to melt down a lot due to these projects when I realize I need something else in order to finish it. I feel bad for the charity thing because I don't feel like I'm doing it for the right reasons. It feels like I'm compensating and it's more about my personal therapy for some of my other mental illnesses. My husband insists that everything I do is because I am a good person deep down with severe issues that are hard to overcome enough. I am so happy he is understanding... I also have PTSD, so he has a LOT to deal with. I have attempted suicide and he alone is trying to do his best to keep me alive and functioning. My kids don't know yet and I am afraid to tell them because BPD is often seen as abusive by a lot of people that grew up with someone with it. We aren't trying to exhibit these behaviors out of maliciousness. We can't help it and we will and always hate ourselves for it.
Mysteria Kiito Idk if u are a religious person but I will be praying for you
I stopped being religious years ago because I do find it hard to believe that some higher power lets people suffer, not just me. I do appreciate the good vibes, though. I know that you have good intent whether I am religious or not. Despite religion, this shows you have a good heart. I hope the best for you as well. Be safe and stay strong.
Mysteria Kiito I'm not here to change ur mind just something to think about. God does care but his authority has been challenged and he's allowing fair time for Satan to try to prove himself so right not the devil controls the world but that will soon end and the world will be resorted and nobody will challenge god again because his point will be proven that he is the rightful sovereign ruler of the universe. 💜💜💜 best of wishes to u
My mother has BPD and will never remain consistent on her feelings. One minute, I'm her favorite person in the world and she adores me. The next? She's yelling at me over something that has never been a problem. When I moved out into my own place, she spent the week while I was packing scolding me for both leaving and not packing quickly enough.
It was hard living with her. It's so difficult to love someone and simultaneously be constantly pushed away. Her recklessness put our family in financial danger several times and she tends to draw relationships with emotional abusers ever since her divorce. I miss my mother, but I don't know who she is.
alize06 sorry to hear that :((
I personally relate... that sounds EXACTLY like my mom....
Yes! I know exactly what you mean. This one time I was in search for a job and she helped me with my search for one. When I told her she didn't have to help me with finding a job she insisted on helping me. The very next day however she starts yelling at me that i'm lazy and should find a job on my own.
I was mindblown. I didn't understand her sudden change of mind. Because we had no idea she had Borderline I got angry with her and yelled back at her after throwing some insults my way.
Is this my daughter?
I'm sorry man. My mother has bpd and abused me throughout my childhood. When he was at her worst I couldn't leave my room. Eventually there was a change in custody. Personally, I found distancing myself as much as possible from her was healther for me
Thank you for not portraying those with BPD as manipulative or vengeful. We get enough of that already. Anyone can be manipulative.
@@lookatme.3794 For all you know they could have been clinically diagnosed-
And they dont appear to be proud of having BPD, they were merely thanking the channel for not representing suffers in a negative way because those with BPD are typically portrayed as manipulative/abusive; Its true in some cases but like fuyu said, anyone can be manipulative.
my name...
I really need to see a therapist....
If you are unable to see a therapist, I suggest looking into at least trying the Dialectical Behavioural Therapy workbook by Marsha Linehan.
Carly D. I'll try that, thanks for the suggestion.
Martin Goddard how the hell could someone NOT be ready when they need help?
Em Gardner be ready to be on several different anti depressants by the end of the month. Don't know what to tell ya, bud.
I need to stop lying to mine
After I was diagnosed with bpd I told a close friend and she did research and then she told me insensitivity "it's basically depression" but the way she said it angered me and I wanted to yell at her and cry at the same time because it was just the little thing that bothered me
People don't understand BPD and it's so frustrating. I've subcummed to just comparing it to bipolar disorder
U have a rite to be pissed off. "Basically depression" WHAT?? Bet they dnt even know what depression is either or else wudnt say that!!
I have sadistic personality disorder
dont worry as she grows and becomes more mature she will look back on what she said to you and feel like an idiot for saying such a stupid comment. I hope you made it atleast a little bit obvious you were upset by what she said...
I told my best friend I have it after being diagnosed twice and correlating so many of the bad situations I’ve gotten myself in and my behaviour and relationship breakdowns and mood etc etc all of it, and she just brushed it off saying I don’t, that I’m not crazy.
It’s lovely cause she’s basically my only close friend..
The saddest part is that you wouldn’t want to say sorry because you know you’ll end up doing it again unintentionally.
I didn’t know I had bpd until my 18th birthday pretty recently.. I would always say sorry even tho I knew it was hard to control. I lost her because of this but it’s okay she’s moved on. She even noticed my mood change saying “sometimes you are the most nicest and sweetest person I met but other times you are completely different “
I am who I am and if it kills me I’m ready to die
don't it is a permanent fix to a temporary problem.
You may think that that is a way out but its not. I have tried and almost made it my reality time after time. You are not alone. I myself still struggle to stay afloat in this hard thing called life but it does get better. I promise you if you asked me a year or two if I would ever say this is tell you your a lier and a dumb ass to think I cared if I was dead or alive. But it does matter. If I had my myself disappear then I could never have seen my big brothers little kid or see my little brother grow up anyway what I'm saying it there is something to live for your just not seeing it. Just keep trying you'll make soon enough.
Seriously my thoughts, you can't live a life regretting and being ashamed of who you are. I actually like being like this beyond all the problems my intensity and inestability cause to me
@@Im_NotSure But whatever is upsetting someone is. And you can still get better, even with mental illness.
X2 man
I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone
I long for that feeling to not feel at all
The higher I get, the lower I'll sink
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim
😻😻😻😻
Just osm
bruh harward wants to know your location
That’s the lyrics of a song
BMTH is so good, they helped in some difficult times
I think I might have BPD but I would have to be diagnosed by a doctor to know for sure. I mean, it sounds a lot like me but who knows, I might have something else.
Same, I have all of the symptoms but I am very scared to tell my mom about it and I feel like people may think I am insane.
I think I have BPD too
Pastel_Thing yeah, I’m scared to ask my mom so that way I can be diagnosed but idk I don’t want help also. ;-; maybe I should just forget about it. I’m not sure.
I’ve tried to say something to my parents... but my dad just thinks I’m being paranoid or like I’m being a hypochondriac or something. He says that bc I’m self aware that I don’t have bpd (or “schizophrenia” as he called it)
Exactly. It kinda sucks because when I told my parents about my anger issues and how I constantly fight with my best friend because I feel like he hates me, they just said "it's just puberty". Maybe it was. But it sucks. I just want to enjoy life without feeling like I was on some kind of an emotional rollercoaster.
I have bpd and trust me..this is so frustrating
HELL YEAH
It is sadly.. i dont know how to manage, plus if i say this to anyone they ll make fun of, no one wont belive me, cause, everyone sees me as im kind of a 'party guy' or something. But im not. I dont know how to manage it, i need help. And if you're too, anyone who reeding this, you're not alone about this feelings. Dont feel alone. You ll never walk alone
Awww sweet 😔 hope find peace and love you even tough situations and struggles frustrated situations as well.
Suny Shin it truly is ):
I have BPD too....
As someone who has struggled with bpd a very long time the mean harsh comments I see on here absolutely break my heart . I cannot say I've never hurt anyone with my emotional rollercoasters but I can say that I'm highly compassionate and loving and that not everyone with bpd is the same . Anyone is capable of hurting someone . Try putting yourself in the shoes of the person suffering with this it's not a pleasant thing . I hope people are able to find compassion and start being kinder to one another .
Sabrina Tofts I know this comment is old, but I relate a lot. I’ve recently realized that my emotional issues fit into BPD perfectly, especially considering my background, and overlapping OCD and Major Depressive Disorder. Realizing I have BPD and trying to educate myself more on how others see it has been EXTREMELY painful and upsetting. They talk like everyone with BPD is an explosive, abusive, manipulative monster - as if being shitty is in the diagnostic criteria. Outbursts directed towards others arent, and never have been , in the diagnostic criteria. Just the experiences of the emotions and shame itself. It’s very disappointing and upsetting to see so many people spreading misinformation. I’m sorry we share this experience.
I think the problem is is that a lot of people are frustrated with their own experiences and cant keep themselves from being mad. Which is completely understandable. But people have got to remember that this is a mental illness and not a moral failing. Its ok to be frustrated with the situation and maybe at the person suffering from bpd but these are symptoms. If you become bitter and resentful than you might catch some of those bad habits as a healthy individual.
Today is a great day
Wtf this is the worst day ever
Yep, that about nails it
Lol, this mad me laugh,
Even tough this day sucks so much..
it's my every day life!
Exactly. Love Who and What you believe. But Hate It at the Same Time.
Yes, thats' the spirit! What other positive thinking do you practice on a daily basis?
Its not caused by a single event its a long term trauma. Thats why long term abuse is usually the cause.
GaiR BaeR they don't actually know what causes bpd....there's a correlation with abuse and bpd but that doesn't mean abuse of any kind is actually the reason for the disorder (and they said that in the video)
I have grown up with non-stop mental/emotional abuse. It doesn't surprise me that I have almost all the symptoms mentioned in this video
I remember various traumas throughout my life but they're very vague. Don't understand how I can obtain all these symptoms when I can't recall most of my traumas? Can bpd be a genetic thing? However I'm guessing not because it's caused by your own traumas right? I don't know because my mom also has severe bpd as well
My mother's was caused by a traumatic event
dangerous womens I have BPD, and when you go through certain events that can really impact you in a bad way, your mind will try to forget it, block it out, but you will always have a scar that's almost ripping open, even if you can't remember exactly what happened, but it happened, also then you can also become the product of the environment.
The best cure of BPD is unconditional love.
*for yourself
Love should never be unconditional. There's no need to devalue people with mental illnesses but if they're causing harm to you, whether that be mentally or physically then that is definitely a condition to stop loving them. Unconditional love is a trap. And people deserve better
Heinz Unconditional love doesn’t mean subject yourself to abuse: you can still show love to someone while protecting yourself through boundaries. Not to mention, many of us with BPD did lack unconditional love as a child and are thusly screwed up from it.
That's a load of bullshit. BPD doesn't care if love is constant and unconditional bc it always finds a way to irrationalize every situation
I have bpd and I'm most stable when I'm near people who I love and love me back
I wish I could show this to the people that already gave up on me.
Sara Allen same
It's not too late? What's the harm in showing it now?
I'll be the crazy obsessive chick. I am a good friend and try to be "normal" and it's hard to explain my slip ups. I haven't found anyone who wants to deal with a friend with so much baggage. I take too much patience. I am too much work.
FYI everyone.... I have a diagnosis. I am bpd. Not just hashtag relatable.
Sara Allen I get where you're coming from. I hate that I sometimes resemble the "crazy girlfriend" or "crazy/creepy girl" but it almost feels like it's the mold I fall into in times where my emotions really get a hold of me. Other people don't understand us sometimes, and that's okay. We're not always perfect, we don't always do the best things to deal with our problems, we don't always treat other people the way we should. It's okay. The best thing we can do as people with BPD is accept that we aren't perfect, and that we see the world in a different way. We have to learn to see it in a way that paints us in a positive light.
I have, or at least had, a good friend who has BPD.
For the beginning years I knew her, she was an amazing person. She loved magic, tarot cards, card games among countless other things. She was quite wise, and was always willing to offer advice about personal problems. I looked up to her.
One night, I went out with her, her boyfriend and some other friends to a bar. Sometime, her boyfriend said some pretty rude things about her (I can't quite remember, we were all pretty drunk), and we eventually left without him. That one fateful night her BPD took ahold of her and she was never the same.
She became overly paranoid, believing that others hated her and wanted to leave her. She was quite violent, and picked up fights, both verbal and physical, pretty easily with even her closest friends.
She once got in a fight with a new boyfriend she had, and threatened to slap his son. We had called 911, and they took her into a mental institution for a few weeks, but they eventually checked her out and she was sent home.
I used to make daily calls with her to let her know I care about her, but most conversations ended with accusing me of hating her and threatening to kill herself.
She spammed my phone with messages and calls, and after two years of nonstop violence, I eventually cut all ties with her.
I don't even know if she's still alive today. She very well may have finally killed herself. I hope she hasn't. Because underneath all that BPD-covered hatred and violence and jealousy and paranoia lies a beautiful person with her own personality, her own accomplishments and so much more.
I miss the old her. I hope one day, if she's still alive, that she'll finally be willing to seek treatment for her condition so she can break through this false personality. What I'd give to see her like she truly is, just one more time...
The Pope this made me cry. i'm diagnosed with bpd and i'm so happy there is someone like you
Am i your friend?..
@@ayctky901 me too ;-;
Define what is "normal". But nobody is "normal" as we are all different.
TMR Teckk When people say normal in this sense, they mean most common. It's not common to have a mental illness because you're not typically born with it.
TMR Teckk well it's like the statistical average
there's more than just one way of being "not normal" if I have a green arm that would be weird even if most people weren't normal because very few people still have a green arm, there might be few people who are "normal" but the individual ways of being a different a rare enough that we know they aren't normal.
I like this, if the sentiment goes both ways and is not just an apology for suckiness.
BPD is called that because we as a society agree about certain behavioural values and adequate reactions, and some people are, as harsh as it sounds, not good enough. Everyone including themselves suffers from that.
But you are right normalcy is hard to define especially on an individual basis. individual culutural differences or difficult or "enabling" circumstances might alter someone's behavior. They also cause different interpretations of each criterion for BPD. Say Agatha is rich (enabling circumstance) and buys shit like a 100$ bag on impulse....that is still less harmful to her than buying a 20$ bag on impulse is for Berta who is poor. We don't know what Agatha would do in Bertas place for sure. thus we migt not be able to diagnose her. Or: a fat therapist might not call impulsive eating "sick" as soon as a skinny therapist. So not all BPD people are the same and equally "abnormal". Fairness (aknoweldging individual traits) is important, also so that "they" have nothing in their hands against their helpers and victims.
At the same time "normal" people should not get away with BPD-like behavior just because they are non-BPD, or because their therapist happens to have a soft heart and doesn't call their choices mentally ill.
I always ask people that question? What is normality? Which is basically just someone's perspective of what it is
My friend recently told me that she had bpd and I want to learn more and to help her ❤️
I really hope she's okay!
Thjs is so nice!!!! Dont treat her much different as i know with bpd i dont wanna be treated different.. Unless its by my love..
This diagnosis ruined my life. Yeah, I always acknowledged that I have some serious problems with my emotional life and I would get upset over the smallest things. Almost all of my close and important relationships have come to its end. But I never felt depressed or bad about myself before unless I really really hurt someone by insulting them the way I acted. I felt pretty normal just "a bit oversensitive"
After diagnosis I started to pay more attention to my behavior but in the wrong way. If I would lose my control and jump to an emotional roller coaster again I would spend a long time apologizing every fucking human-being after I calmed down. And I feel so bad and depressed about it. I keep thinking that once again I caused a scene and everybody think I'm a stupid drama queen, even though I didn't insult anyone. Overreact - apologize - overreact - apologize...the loop just goes on and it drives me so fucking crazy.
I hate myself. Fortunately I'm about to start my psychotherapy and get help. I don't wanna change completely to a new person. I'm proud of my extreme emotions when they are positive. I can give more love than anyone in the world and my sense of justice is strong since I can put myself so well in someone else position (strong emotional life plays a role) and then stood up for all the people who need defending. I just wish I could control myself better, that's all I really want.
me too when the psychiatrist diagnosed me with it I googled it and read the most horrendous things ,I do relate to most of the symptoms but when they say things like reckless sex unstable relationships etc I don't relate because I isolate myself so bad I don't even form relationships and my depression is so bad I don't even want to have sex ,I don't abuse drugs etc but the self harm and mood swings are accurate but at the same time every psychiatrist you meet would probably give you a different diagnosis
I know the feeling was diagnosed with BPD three months ago, I know the toll it takes on your life. I lost my girlfriend of 4 years, career, family members. Screw BPD. I wish you the best of luck in your therapy. If you ever need anyone to talk to or someone who understands your emotional roller coaster, because trust me I know the track. Just email me: Davis.Fox@sae-nashville.net
I know this feeling all too well. I was in therapy because I felt sad and suicidal all the time, even in moments I knew I should be happy. I never bothered to look up any mental illnesses or disorders since I didn’t deal with them but then they said I had a depression, and probably some personality disorder, too. They wanted to investigate that so they could throw that label on me but I didn’t cooperate... I already felt bad for the fact that I was in a depression and it was only then I noticed that I was literally sad 24/7. I became more suicidal but eventually I started feeling a little better and then stopped with therapy. Then I felt amazing again. I just don’t want to have those labels on me, I know I will be more self-conscious and not in a good way. But now personality disorders do interest me very much haha
Me too...
I'm among the recently diagnosed, but there's no DBT near me. There's one about 50 miles away and it's $80 per session, which is far too much for me to afford, sadly.
Anyway, unfortunately I'm in the same boat as you, Krista-Maria, where now I'm aware of the messed up stuff I've been doing all this time, except now I feel even worse about it, and it's breaking me down. I've spent far more time depressed since my diagnosis (they also said I was codependent, which is a stellar f-ing combination) because of the guilt and self-shaming cycle.
I confessed my diagnosis to my mother. I showed her the first few minutes of an episode of Bojack Horseman (episode title, "Stupid Piece of Shit") because that's what it's like in my head, and I told her the truth, that no one hates me as much as I hate me.
She says I'm generous, kind, and basically a good person, despite my flaws. All I could think about was that the scale is so severely tipped from the staggering amount of flaws.
I just wish I knew how to be better, how to be a person. Except I'm fucked up and I don't know how to un-fuck my brain.
These videos are always so accurate. It's scary and cool
Thanks for watching! Hope it helps!
Yeah I thinks its pretty cool too
I hope you meant that the video was cool not the decease. Cause it's not fucking cool. It's like living in hell where the only feelings that you can get is pain and anxiety. You don't want to open up and tell anyone about this shit devouring you from the inside so you slowly disappear in your own fears, concerns and depression. This is not fucking cool. This is suffering.
+Lola Murha... I think it was kind of obvious he meant the video, do uou want to talk?
Ive been diagnosed with BPD recently and for 15 years ive been wrongfully treated for depression.
Hopefully with treatment i can be happy and live a normal excistence one day.
After taking a psychopathology class in college last year, I realized this was me. All the symptoms lined up. I had been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and even bipolar disorder II by some; and every time I tried to tell a doctor I was experiencing symptoms extremely similar to BPD, they dismissed it. I explained myself so much. I did everything I could to get someone to understand I have BPD. It isn’t hard for someone, even in my state of mind, to relate to and identify with a diagnosis so deeply. I still haven’t found any psychiatrist that has properly diagnosed me with it, but I instead have diagnosed myself. My therapist understands this, at the very least. But what I’m trying to say is.. people, STOP being afraid of BPD. Stop being afraid of a diagnosis. Stop being afraid of us. Stop being afraid of me.
After my experiences with my Borderline mother...Damn straight I am afraid of you and every decent, kind and caring human being should afraid of every Borderline.
You are loved!
@@johnthedespicabledutchman7406 u good bro?
@@sludgerat444 All is good and life is good.
When i was diagnosed i was given no information of symptoms to look out for. Recently i hit the wall over a bitter wrong that was done to me. While i dealt with it poorly by not explaining why i was so terribly hurt as well as my spouse by a lie meant to ostracise us from an incredibly painful funeral i swallowed it until i snapped on line and unknown to me was a group chat i have been vilified. Fine I can understand it but at the same time they played the victim which made me look like a vindictive bitch. I cant ho an hour without it appearing in my thoughts. This is not bpd this is life. Good and bad
I've been diagnosed with it.
I don't want this anymore. I feel like I'm going crazy sometimes.
Sayren Nani what does it feel like when you're in a relationship?
What does it feel like,Im married with 2 kids it takes a huge toll on a marriage its very hard...But I have bern married to the same guy for 15 years,not going to lie it is not easy in the least
J M awkward doesn't quite cover it, right? It's the worst. I hate myself so much and constantly make me stand in a bad light, I feel like I didn't deserve anything that could do me good. And it does affect my relationship sometimes especially when it gets to intimacy. Trying to explain your partner how much you absolutely do not like yourself and it not being his fault is tough. He knows how much I'm struggling with myself and the worst thing for him is not knowing what to do. I always tell him being there is enough but he still wishes to be able to help me. And that frustrates him a lot. Which results in me intensifying the negative way I see myself because I made him feel this bad. It's just one major struggle. And I don't know what to do about it. Because I'm waiting for therapy since months. And nothing is happening. He knows how self destructive my thoughts are, I don't necessarily hurt myself as in cutting but there are times, where I can't walk because my foot hurts or I lose my job because I'm constantly sick although I'm physically at full health. And he can't help me. That's the worst part of it. To see your partner being frustrated and sad because he can't do anything to help. That hurts.
Davis Fox
1 second ago
I know the feeling was diagnosed with BPD three months ago, I know the toll it takes on your life. I lost my girlfriend of 4 years, career, family members. Screw BPD. If you ever need anyone to talk to or someone who understands your emotional roller coaster, because trust me I know the track. Just email me: Davis.Fox@sae-nashville.net
Most people diagnosed with it don’t even have it I’ve got one psychologist telling others I have the traits of this BPD, however my counselor doesn’t think I have it at all, she sees that I’m autistic... high functioning autism...
I just got diagnosed today BPD today💔 I'm going to take my medication and attend the therapy sessions
Hopefully you are feeling better now *hug* :'(
What happend to you now ? Feeling better?
It won’t help! A pill is not what gave it to you! So why do you think a pill will Felix it!
Jrew Cooper anti vaxxer, VACANATE YOUR KIDS, IF YOU DONT YOUR KIDS WILL DIE, AUTISUM IS NOT CAUSED BY VACATIONS, AND ITS BETTER TO HAVE A AUTISTIC KID THEN A DEAD ONE
Medicine can’t help bpd
I am clinically diagnosed with BPD by an actual doctor, and take a shit ton of meds for different things. Mental illness is thrown around like a trend now, but having a real mental illness is literally living within your own personal hell. BPD makes my personal relationships rocky and unstable(Romantic, friendships, family). Im truly lucky to have found someone who understands i cant control my sudden mood swings and who knows that ill say things I dont really mean. I dont know how my boyfriend puts up with it, but the fact remains, he never gave up. Personally? DBT never worked well with me. It might have been the lady running it but i felt more threatened than anything.
Starscream91 please tell me youre joking
Starscream91 because having a lover doesnt cure chronic mental illness
I recently started dating a girl who has been diagnosed with this illness she 100 percent has it. We met about 6 weeks ago. Hung out everyday. Always felt like she was 1 foot in and 1 foot out. She says she has trust issues so I understood. Out of no where she cut communications with me down by A LOT and we haven't hung out in over a week. Night and day difference.
My question for you is have you experience with this? I treat her very very well and she said I'm not like most guys. I haven't done anything wrong to her. Have you ever gotten to the point when you just wanna drop your bf? She's doing that to me except she doesn't want me gone because when I told her we shouldn't see each other anymore since she doesn't want to hangout she than told me she can't help it. She doesn't want me gone she just doesn't want to see me. Obviously it's impossible to have a relationship with someone who does that for a long period of time. If she's still doing this a week or 2 from now I have to leave.
But I was wondering if you get like this?
NYCman sorry to hear that :/ well with BPD you go through some periods of shutting down i guess. You kinda push everyone away, unintentionally. Makes friendships and relationships harder. The biggest thing is to tell her she can take allthe time she needs and that youll be there for her. The mood swings and changing often is all part of BPD. She loves you im sure. Like me with my bf, sometimes ill end up like shutting down and sometimes ill snap at him but he knows im not trying to be that way.
I've been clinically diagnosed with BPD, and like you have found someone that really tries to understand and stand in my shoes. DBT was so incredibly boring and drawn out that I found myself consistently bored and zoning off somewhere else. Also to the uneducated comment that said something about having a lover and not complaining blah blah blah, did you not watch the video? Or have done research about the illness or are you just shootin' the shit? Someone can't heal your wounds for you, they can only support you the best way you can. Take robin Williams for example, he was loved by lots and he loved lots but in the end he took his own life because that's how bad it became. No matter the love or the support that he got, suicide was what he thought was the only way out. So next time, think about your dumb comments before you post and you make yourself look like a complete degenerate.
When I was a kid, my older brother sexually abused me. It went on for a while, I’m not sure how long, but I can remember many instances of it happening. Ever since I was around 11, I’ve been spiraling. Dealing with out of control emotions that caused me to act ‘crazy’ and lose many of my friends. I’ve been called dramatic, crazy, emotional, attention whore, more times than I can count. I wondered for six years what was wrong with me and when I researched BPD, it clicked. Thank you for this video. And anyone else who is dealing with this too- I respect you, and I’m here for you.
I was diagnosed with BPD and my boyfriend broke up with me. I never treated him badly and would always try to be happy around him so that he didnt have to deal with my problems. One day i couldnt take it anymore and i overdosed, when i came out of hospital, he broke up with me. It was the most pain i've ever felt in my entire life and i hope no one has to ever go through that.
Hey! I'm so sorry to hear that, you deserve someone who loves you for who you are and who you can feel comfortable enough to be truly yourself with.
I've been hospitalized several times before, and every time I was treated for BPD. I did lots of studying on DBT AND CBT and I use DBT everyday, I know that for sure. I think everybody can use some DBT, regardless of your emotional/mental health. It actually helps.
On the discharge sheets they'd always write down BPD, and it's completely accurate for me. (They can't properly diagnose me because I'm under 18 but it must've been apparent) I also have OCD, which was more prevalent before the BPD started showing itself. I think more information needs to be spread about both disorders, cuz I hear people saying "Oh yeah I'm so OCD I always have to keep my room clean" or "I probably have BPD because I can't ever hold a relationship". These are very serious illnesses and they're not something to wear as an accessory, you know? It's not something to be "proud of".
For me, the relationship part is the worst. Here's what it's like, stage by stage.
1. I meet someone and become infatuated
2. Will not leave them alone because they "make me so happy I never want them out of my sight"
3. I think my depression has gone away and my world has been fixed
4. I start finding a little thing that they could've done wrong, or come up with an ulterior motive for their friendship/relationship with me.
5. I drive myself so crazy thinking about some *tiny* thing they've said/done/haven't done that my heart explodes, right? I'm in constant distress.
6. I drop you. I block you. I leave things messy between us.
7. I can also just literally lose interest in you altogether, too. Skip 4, 5, and 6.
That's what it's like. I'll stop blabbing now but for me that's the worst part of BPD for me. Thanks for reading if you got this far btw.
Reanna, The Creator I dont wanna make assumptions but i had a shit upbringing so i definitly qualify. As a teen i was most if not all those thing...and probally worse. TLDR i was out of control. After i escaped from a my long term stressors it did get easier tho. Not at first but after the initial meds and therepy hump i felt alot better. I still am a very eccentric person but these days most just say bi-polar not bpd. Even tho i frequently use DBT style techniques and if my stressors get bad enough i hallucinate to varying degrees. No comment on relationships tho workin on that. Im very cautious considering i one that caused my mind to shatter for a bit. Either way good news is those raging hormones as a teen dont help so it gets easier as an adult even if marginally. GL reguardless.
BPD is usually caused by a long term trauma with some biological influences. Which is why you hear borderline-bipolar alot. My only advice is alot of the times you may feel pretty stable, but most might percieve otherwise. I got approval to try getting off meds but i dont reccomend it. I think i can manage mainly cause i figured out myself long before treatment a system to use my issues advantageously in a healthy manner. Then again im bipolar to could be different.
Sorry for the long wall of txt gl to you reguardless.
Reanna, The Creator Oh also ps in a relationship not even just dating. I had that same issue. Your mind gradually completely flips your opinion of someone overtime. Mine went as far as to make complete bullshit up. They hate you, their cheating/disinterested, ect. Dont be afraid to ask your loved ones and friends questions. I might go. This is probally dumb but i think your mad at me cause...am i on the right path or is it unfounded? Or I think im having a borderline moment, but are you pissed at me? No? Ok cool. Generally those im closest to are willing to anwser. In a relationship the two hardest things are getting started and not forming an obsession. I obsess at first sight, then obsess about thinking how to fix a problem maybe only im percieving. Seriously communicate properly it helps. Its easier to play it off casual before it blows up. Finally for me at least the more i know a person the easier it gets. I have people where it rarely flares up if at all.
PS all this being said partly due to PTSD problems, I have had very few intimate relationships. Ive yet to get comfortable on that lvl yet. Im also no expert just sharing my experiences...to me its less cliche than it gets better. K shutting up now.
Your steps for what happens in your relationships freaked me the hell out. That is EXACTLY what happens to me every time. I definitely have dysthymia and GAD but damn.
Reanna, The Creator I have a friend that does the same thing... she's like, "with the things I see, Im surprised im not schizophrenic" and she always (as much as I love her) annoys me when she acts like she's sooo depressed and something is really wrong with her. She thinks being like that is fine because it's _different_ . She is right about it being different. But it's not a good different at all. It's a terrible feeling. She acted like this especially after I had taken a personality test and my results for chances of having OCD and BPD were at very high. When she had taken it she had gotten low on all disorders on there, including schizoid and BPD. She was like, Im surprised, I thought Id get a high in both like you did. She always says this kind of stuff like she wants to be broken and demented. Meanwhile Im just wondering why? Why would you want to be considered that? It's just...terrible.
Reanna, The Creator this is very accurate and i feel the same way...
My friend has this, so I'm watching to learn more about it.
You're amazing for doing that
that's what i expected my ex bf to do and never did, thank u
Same
God bless ya soul 🥺
@@cristome534 you're welcome ❤️
Anyone else with BPD experience extreme over sensitivity to emotions/energies...
It feels like im in tune with all kinds of different energies all the time, espesially with people around,
I can't control them and they make me SOO fckn tired....
And I'm a Guy so yeah , dating is practically fucked : (
Guidetti I’m on the same boat with you
¿Que?
Same here...
Guidetti dear lord I feel this so much... especially as a guy...
Frrrrr I feel lonely and hopeless asf I can never have enough attention I'm fuckedddd upppppp bitch and idccccxxxxx
For the people above and many other who will read this - guys it does get better. If you work on it it does. I didn't know whats wring with me and 2 therapist failed to diagnose me before it came all out, because I seem like a stable, strong, logical woman, but the strom inside...oh dear God it was so bad. My body has scars of deep cuts, I almost lost my left kidney as a result of drug abuse, my friends were heavily addicted and equally sick, my relationships were difficult and obsessive. But I never gave up guys I never accepted that this will be my life. I decided to fight to get better even if it takes all life. What helped me - well I have been with a few therapists, I red books, forums, watched videos and were sharing with friends. So first is share and get info. Then your brain will process it all in few years it will start auto correcting and slowly dropping some of the toxic patterns. Yes meditation and spirituality. Yes science and studies. Yes hardcore work of general self development - work and workouts, university, money and so on. Sport, loads of sport. Dropping the bad substances or be balanced with them. Using is one thing addiction and abusing is another. 1 step forward 2 steps back, then 2 steps forward and so on. For the last 10 years I walked a long, crazy and quite often difficult way. I had love and I had fun but also a lot of drama, tears and difficulties. You need closure with the people who caused his as well if there are such people. Last but not least - you may find another way as well. I tried many many things and some helped a lot others a bit. I am 28 now. I am have been single for the last 3 years on and off, but I now feel way more complete and happy than before. Symptoms are often back but I know what causes them and I let then shake me for a while then I shake them off :) I have my BPD and codependency more or less under control. I laugh. I have great job, I am successful. I have good friends and significantly better relationship with my parents. I have lovers and I know a special someone will one day stick around for good and this time I will be way more mature and ready to engage in a healthy and beautiful love, hopefully even have family and kids in parallel to my career. So remember WORK HARD AND TAKE YOUR TIME LIFE IS A RIDE WITH UPS AND DOWNS. IT DOES GET BETTER FOR US BPD AND CODEPENDENCY FOLKS. IT REALLY DOES GET BETTER
Love your comment! Thank you so much
I wish you happiness today
Thank you ❤
I needed to read this today. Thank you so much
How did you feel 10 minutes after you wrote this?
These always fail to mention that these illnesses and personality disorders can heavily vary from person to person. If someone lacks one criteria, it does not disqualify them from being valid. There is such a thing as a BPD without severe abandonment issues. Ik, almost unheard of apparently.
I wish you could go more into the quiet borderline side of BPD. I have it but I am more of the quiet type.
same. Videos like this is why people get misdiagnosed. Because i'm the quiet type, previous doctors would just label me as depressed and anxious. I'm glad my psychologist is looking deeper
Same
I highly doubt I have bpd but it would explain the severe anxiety, violent mood swings, seeing myself as someone else, inability to form steady relationships, and stress leading to anger issues.🤷♀️
Belle St. John it’s so dangerous to self diagnose. Check out the criteria and if it fits, talk to a doctors. If you have a mental health illness you didn’t even consider and are convinced you have BPD without a diagnosis, it can be really unhealthy for your mentality. Good luck with whatever you choose to move forward with :)
@@blackfairyxdusy This is literally the farthest you can get from self diagnosis other than just not thinking about it. If shes considering the fact that she has BPD that means she relates to the video somewhat and if she relates to the video somewhat than its a miracle that she said anything at all. If no one had an idea of what disorder they had than no body would ever be getting help.
@@blackfairyxdusy
Op: i doubt i have bpd
You: how dare u self diagnose
lmao this is me
I think i have bpd... Or maybe i don't. I really don't know anymore...
Have you talked to a professional?
Psych2Go Not yet, but if I'm smart I'll talk to one. Yeah, I'll do that.
you and me both
Desdemona Horiona i think i have or i might be stupid
αgi boubi You're not stupid. You sound intelligent to me. You must have low self-esteem like I do. * Hugs* you and I will get through this. Believe.
A major feature associated with BPD, not discussed in this presentation, is a phenomenon called "splitting."
This is the coping mechanism where a person is not able to understand or recognize gray areas. Borderlines tend to see and react to the world in a good or evil dichotomy.
One of my preceptors during my psych rotation shared an anecdote that helps me recognize a patient with BPD: He said when he gets a new patient who gives him the highest praise and tells him that he is the "greatest doc" or something along those lines, he says that he essentially braces himself for the eventuality of pissing off the patient... then all hell breaks loose and he becomes the "most horrible" doctor or something similar.
This splitting is a result of, for example, a scenario where a parent (or primary caregiver) is loving, kind, warm... when they are sober but become severely abusive when drunk.
In a hospital or work setting the BPD patient will often attempt to turn the entire staff against a nurse, psychiatrist or coworker who they feel has wronged them.
One of the easiest ways to identify a borderline is this splitting. Essentially, they love you, love you, love you, until you challenge them or (in their mind) cross them. Then they hate you and make sure the rest of the world hates you as well.
A key thing to remember when you find yourself as the object of this anger, is that you should take it personally, because the behavior is not about you, but they way the person copes with the world.
besides DBT, what would be the best therapy? i really need help, please suggest anything - books, articles, blogs. can't access dbt in india esp where i live. any help would be appreciated
I like this for the good summary and clarity.
But I think you make a major mistake to divide the world in two species “the borderlines” and “the normals".
It seems you are saying (because of that story) that everyone with this coping mechanism is one of “them” the borderlines and not one of “you” the normals.
Well. I believe it is important to realize that BPD is a cluster of symptoms that often appear together but that can also appear independently and in different intensities. (I am also rephrasing what a therapist said). It is like saying everyone who self-harms or has some reckless habits, or flash backs, or an eating disorder is “a borderline” and by extension everyone who apologizes a lot or has creative talent. I could give examples of people who don't, but well, it is just an opinion anyway.
Also it seems you think “they” (“we”, the borderlines) just happen to do that and hurt people like it is inherent to diagnosed individuals like a heart or a liver. The long and the short: I think I almost never did that openly since I’m older than 12. I am VERY emotional about someone somehow “crossing” me. But generally I have hard time “hating” people because personally I find each human reaction understandable. I take some time and think before making a choice. (Example. I am writing very detailed criticism because I can’t take not doing it, but not a fiber of me believes the author wants to hurt people.) It makes diagnosis more complicated when you are always friendly to your therapist but it isn’t impossible to meet enough criteria.
Why do I bother? Yes I know I likely prove every cliché of a silly oversensitive BPD nutcase writing this novel. Yes I relativize, because I believe sometimes that is important for fairness. Yes I wish I could fully deny my diagnosis and I am in denial sometimes. But I learned that that too has a reason: self protection from inevitable pain.
I think borderline is one of the most terrible “labels” you can put on a person. You require a variety of symptoms to “qualify”. Each symptom is obviously shitty. So what you do when you take one and then “diagnose” the person because of one flaw in their personality, is you accuse them of a whole array of mistakes. You put them in a group of individuals that is officially classified as manipulators (cluster B.) Sure that is good if it actually applies. However if people make isolated mistakes, draw your consequences from their mistakes- but don’t convict them for other behavioral crimes. In the worst case you can unecessarly hurt their self-image or reputation . (I believe it has a reason why there is a law to protect privacy and why psych can withhold diagnosis). I myself feel a bit disgusted each time I hear the diagnosis. Actually I can’t say how much. Knowing people are fair and think in a very differentiated manner on the hand, like most therapists (including the one who told me what I wrote in the second paragraph) helps.
It doesn’t mean the “label” doesn’t have its place. Just be careful with it. I believe no one should suffer more than they need to.
Again I am not hating on this comment. I just won’t repeat everything I agree on.
Achhantei Purkayastha - According to numerous research studies, DBT has proven to be the most effective type of therapy for BPD, followed by Mindfulness/Mentalization therapy. CBT is another useful therapy for this personality disorder, along with schema therapy. For DBT, Marsha Linehan authored an excellent self help book for BPD which teaches DBT and various mindfulness skills, including exercises and the whole 9 yards! I found it helpful and actually utilize many of the strategies taught in this DBT self help book (I suffer from BPD and major depression).
Myfoot_urneck
NICE ADVICE👍! Was going to say something similar...
wow.
I'm borderline and I hate my life
Sugar me too.
I'm alive and I hate my borderline
Me to I've been diagnosed with it last year and it sucks
A lot of people are misdiagnosed I don’t listen to the docs anymore I’ve been misdiagnosed with many things over the last 20 years there is nothing wrong with us we just are seeing the wrong docs that don’t know what they see... my life isn’t perfect but I definitely do not have this, these psychologists think in a hour they can see that someone has BPD that’s so crazy...
I have lot of symptoms of BPD, I'm hyperemotive, I have an extremally strong need of affection/love, I need to talk a lot I almost allways feel alone, like if something was missing, it's very hard, I have some short periodes of depression (few hours/days), I have an unstabled vision of my self, I just know that I was diagnosed with "social anxiety"(strong) but I was 9 yo, today it's much less extrem, and I have "ADD" (ADHD-PI). But I was never diagnosed with BPD, but it's been 5 years that I haven't seen a psychologist / psychiatrist and I feel like I really want to see one again (I saw a psycholog about 6 months ago but just like 3-4 times maybe).
When I saw this video in my feed, I wanted to learn, so I clicked it. I related and looked into it with my therapist. I am now in group therapy with people going through the same thing and it has really helped me. Thank you, so much.
Hi oyasummiii. How have you been 1 year later? I hope you're safe, physically, mentally and emotionally 🙏💙
@@inserthahafunniusername9656 uhm.. doing alright at the moment! thank you so much!!
@@sillaysponge you're welcome ❤️ I hope you continue to feel alright
When I was younger and trying to figure out what was wrong with me (my parents didn't/don't believe mental illness is really a thing), I assumed I must have depression. And then I decided I definitely had anxiety. But, of course, I wouldn't tell anyone because I was unsure on how treatment worked and was afraid I was wrong and I didn't wanna tell people I had something I didn't actually have.
I finally got the chance to go get some help a few years ago, and it seemed like everyone just kinda... treated me like an inhuman puzzle to solve or didn't actually care to talk to me for more than a few minutes before telling me I had said thing because they know best and sent me on my way with no explanation other than, "you probably experience these symptoms because of anxiety." Everything got pushed under the umbrella of "it's probably your anxiety."
Then later on I got a psychiatrist who showed me that there's a big difference between good psychs and bad psychs. A BIG difference. He listened to me and actively tried to get deeper into things to really dig to the deep down answers, thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
I didn't expect to be diagnosed with BPD. PTSD I can understand due to a couple... things, in my life, but BPD? I'd only ever heard of it once from a friend, who explained it as "a person who's mental illness causes them to be a jerk and treat people badly and they're really hard to get along with" and just kinda made people with BPD sound... awful. Then I met another person who's actually been diagnosed with BPD and this person is amazing and I love them so much and they've shared some things about BPD with me so I'm learning more about this thing that I have that no one else talks about.
It's still mostly a mystery to me. I feel everything I study up on about it and it definitely seems to make sense for me to be diagnosed with it, but so many of the resources I've found have been really... vague. I was gonna close my laptop and go to bed because I'm super tired but I saw this video in the suggestions and was like, "wait, maybe I can find out something new about this thing I have."
I hope I'm able to find more information. I imagine knowing a problem makes that problem easier to solve, or at least deal with.
Bendy my parents believe mental disorders are not a thing to.
kelsey mainwaring
because they are smart...
its not real...
I'm experiencing almost the same right now, I don't really know what's wrong with me. I've seen a therapist but it wasn't really a therapy cause my parents didn't want that. It would affect my job if I'd actually get medical treatment and they say that's not worth it. During summer break I realized again that something wasn't alright with me, but I didn't talk to my parents. They don't understand. They just care about me becoming a "normal" person. I'm planning on going to see a doctor as soon as possible, I want to break free from this, it doesn't feel right. I'm rather getting cured from mental illnesses and having problems with finding jobs than keeping my job (apprenticeship) and suffering from mental illnesses my whole life
@@crysisoncrack
its feelings we all feel...nothin is wrong with you...
@@GooTheGuru I don't know, I don't know shit. I'm very insecure about stuff like this, especially myself...
My mind always changes all the time. I can't control my mind.
It's like I don't want to do that but somehow I'm doing it. I don't wanted to feel that way, but somehow I pushed myself to feel that way.
I am afraid to talk to people, because I'm scared that they will judge me. But I always feel like there's something more...
I don't know if I have bpd? bipolar? Or any mental disorders.
Because I don't think I feel the things that people with anxiety disorders do. But I always push myself to feel what people with anxiety feels.
I know I'm being fucking dramatic, but I can't fucking stop it. I'm so tired over thinking nothing. I feel like my life was just a play, it all just a drama.
I just can't fucking control my mind, inside I know I was doing it wrong, but somehow my body and my mind was just keep pushing me.
I don't have anxiety, but sometimes I just push myself so that I can have anxiety. I am aware that I'm pushing myself but I can't stop it. And keep thinking it over and over again and it makes me so fucking depressed.
I really don't know what's wrong with me, and I don't know who I cant talk to.
Do you guys have any idea on my situation? Is there a term for it? I don't know what to trust anymore...
Please help me.....
Lonely Vagabond I’ve been thinking my situation over and over and over for years, trying to figure out who and what I am. The causes of what made me the way I am and even more so, what my issues are. I feel very similar to how you do. My life feels as though I’m running on a crappy AI program while I watch from the sidelines, my body does and say whatever the fuck it wants no matter how desperately I don’t want to do it, I’m dealing with BPD and the actions and feelings I get from it, but at the same time I am self aware enough that I’m knowing when I’m doing it, it’s just no matter how much my mind screams and cries “please stop I don’t want to do this” my body does it anyway. There’s likely other mental illness mixed in there that do not like to be put together with BPD and that feeling is horrific. I can’t say that life will get better, that you’ll get a grip on things, that you’ll be able to control your actions or that voice inside your head that causes you to read a simple gesture as pure undying hatred, or everlasting love for you. But you aren’t alone in feeling that way, I may not have any myself as I’ve had to hide my feelings away from people especially my family and loved ones because whenever I reveal fragments of all of the dark emotional vortex inside my head it causes them to go into a depression of their own, which in turn worsens my condition significantly but I am aware that there are people out there who have the patience and the kindness to put love you throughout the painful times where no matter what they do you will feel as though you are all alone, and I’m sure you’ll find one one day. It’s been 9 months since your comment. Maybe you’ve found one already
I have the same EXACT THING
@@tdmc6428 ,This is described very well! I'm the same, Oh mann hate life so much , especially the awareness while all these thing are happening holy shit, its though
To read all these comments makes me feel less alone but still, I'm losing it ...
Wow u said a lot of things i couldn't find the words. I don't know who am i. I am almost 24.. it's sad to know that bpd isn't cureable. It's a battle we must fight i feel like i am going crazy!! Bpd is not easy.
marilyn gazelle I have exactly what the original comment described and is that considered bpd?? Sometimes I feel like I’m bipolar but I always feel like I’m just doing it to myself and don’t have any mental disorders
I suspect I have this, does anyone else experience the following?
- when friends text back with a different vibe than usual, being less talkative, etc, I get paranoid that they like me less, so then I decide to cut contact with them for hours and I feel extremely sad and depressed about the ideas that I've convinced myself of.
- I get paranoid that people are talking about me behind my back, or are planning to physically or emotionally hurt me in some way
- I'm extremely bitter towards certain people (usually family or certain friends, not all friends, I am only like this with some), sarcasm comes out and I'm passive aggressive when I'm agitated. I feel guilty and make an effort to not do the same next time, but it happens anyways.
- If someone doesn't respond to me within a few hours but I know they're online, I take it as they like me less, and I shut my phone off and ignore everyone. I don't know why I do this but that's what I do lol
- when I get jealous or insecure of myself, I change things about my social media's such as mass-deletion of photos, etc to make my online image look better
- I almost feel angry at myself for the way I look sometimes. I feel so pretty and amazing one day, and confident, but that feeling can change within an hour to feeling ugly, self loathing. I want to stop talking to everyone when I feel this way and sit on my bed and stare at a wall.
- I sometimes ignore messages from people that care about me for hours because I feel annoying, insecure, or empty and depressed.
- I get extremely jealous and convince myself that my friends will find better friends, end up disliking me, etc and this idea makes me start to dislike them and hate them, but then the next day (or when they respond to my text), I will feel completely fine.
- My self image sometimes gets so bad that I don't speak to anyone or text anyone, and I often reject people because I feel like they just deserve someone prettier, etc even if I am pretty already. I feel depressed, like I want to cry and not talk to anybody, because they probably have better people in their lives anyways. Sometimes I feel worthless, in other words.
- I get moods where I'm happy, feeling artistic and motivated and people notice it so much that they prompt me about it, for example "Wow, you're really happy today, what's going on with you?" and stuff like that.
- I'm really muted with my positive expressions. I feel like I can't feel them properly or as well as most people
- I am hesitant to be open with my mom. When I talk to her I feel like I have a natural guard up that makes it too awkward to show positive emotions, etc. My relationship with my mom and some friends of mine is like this, where I'm monotone, not very ecstatic, or passive aggressive. This one is hard to explain.
Me too same ❤️❤️😭😭
Yes .. u are not alone
That's all meeee 😭😭
I feel great knowing other people feel this too
I know what you are talking about. I feel that i get a complete diffrent mindset that can change so quickly right?
I got diagnosed over 15yrs ago and you just now shed light. Thank you so much for this. Really made me feel like I wasn't alone for once. Thank you! Thank You! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pity be to the person
who falls for the complicated one
the abused, and the mentally screwed
Pity be to the person
who thinks they can repair or show them
how "real love" goes
Pity be to the person
who can't make the abused suffer
as suffer they must
in order to feel loved
Pity be to the abused one
who has trashed the good man
in her search for the real love
Many lifetimes were chanced
and lost, when life's path itself
disappeared and she sunk
Into the red moon's lagoon
Her message "I'm sorry", too late
My BPD partner left me. This poem really gets to me, thank you. I don't know if I'll ever stop grieving.
You say pity about someone to show real love yet people with borderline personality think real love is fucking 2 people and hopping to the next and lying to people about it and their current relationship while the one who dont have mental disorders who had a loving family know what love is or even ones who went through abuse can learn and reconstruct on societal constructs and love fundamentals properly without excuses and manage awareness and morals.gtfo.
knoxy socksies I'm going threw the same thing I actually helped him with his bpd by going to his psych apt was by his side while he ranted and raved about no one understanding him and loving him the reason why I left was because he was lying and saying he was getting help for his issues instead he dumped me and hooked up with someone else the cruelest part of it all was the way he confessed it on the phone we were talking about everyday things his whole attitude changed and that's when he dumped me I didn't deserve that I was with him 5 years well at least now I know and I'm able to slowly regain my life back it will take time
You will feel better
sgdfg I know BPD people, including myself, who would never cheat on anyone and stay loyal to their partner because they're terrified of feeling abandoned and rejected. I used to be like what I just said myself until I found that one person who I knew I will always love even if we broke up a while back. There will always be bad bits from a collective but that shouldn't negate the existence of others.
sgdfg That's not at all accurate. Borderlines do feel real love and many borderlines don't hurt anyone at all. It sounds like you were hurt by a borderline and I'm sorry you were, but that doesn't give you the right to stigmatize an entire illness. You need to realize that most borderlines are not like the one who hurt you.
I was in a relationship with a girl with borderline personality disorder. It was the most traumatic experience of my life. She’d go back and forth between telling me I was her everything to telling to kill myself and that I was worthless. I showed her so much empathy through everything and now I feel like I’ve lost the ability to empathize altogether. Eventually I managed to get out of the relationship, but the memories still haunt me. I remember how careful I had to be with every single word I said, fearing that she’d get upset and abuse me. I remember the ways she devalued me. It was torture. I know that not everyone with BPD is like this, but please, if you’re in a relationship with someone who is mistreating you the way I’ve described, don’t make the same mistakes I did. Take care of yourselves and don’t let people abuse you 💕
This sounds horrible, glad that relationship ended! My ‘BPD’ person was my mother 😟
I fear this is how my fiance thinks of me. It's very rough but in the end we know what we are doing to our loved one. If we truly love them then we will try to get help to stop belittling them but if it is that episode it is very hard controlling how i am since i fully have no control
shlump mommy I apologize if it felt like I was demonizing people with BPD in any way, I genuinely empathize with people who have it. I just wanted to share my story to anyone going through something similar. It took a lot for me to end up in the position I was in with my ex partner, and I genuinely don’t believe we would’ve ended up there if she had been interested in taking an objective look at her own behavior. You don’t seem to share that quality and trust me when I say that would have gone a very long way for me.
@@davidiv4915 stoop lol youre good i understood what you meant no need to apolgise. In no way did to demonize bpd
I been there. It sucked. But the crazy sex was great!
The bullism I lived when I was a child and the family problems made me growing with this ... now I have BPD and my life is hell.
Giovanni its comforting to know that others have experienced bullying as a part of it developing, was bullied way too much mixed with home problems you start to hate everyone naturally.
Goro Akechi thanks for the comment
Life is hell..😥
Me too same situation.Gotta see the doctor and tell him to consider treat me for BPD rather than Depression and Anxiety
N.W.A /IceCube I was picked on a lot to my brother would beat me up and punch me and when I would cry he would punch me more and harder in the face telling me to stop crying and he said he bullied me for all these years to make me tougher but in reality it ruined my life I was bullied in school and outside of school at my house a place that is suppose to be a safe haven until my self esteem was crushed and I had to move and lost all my friends making me even sadder until I couldn’t focus on school and my parents are divorced and one is in the military and I would cry as my military family Member was in war and my other significant parent was a alcoholic and I never had help with things I don’t understand like Home work and they both seemed to care about relation ships more than their kids until finally it took its toll the sadness of my life until I dropped out and ever since my life has been screwed not being able to find a job and being financially broke and not being able to afford a education to receive or get a job to fully relying on said parent as a adult and all I can do is drink and become a alcoholic myself welcome to life pain and suffering followed by what might be more pain and suffering if religions are right . And then after all these years of not living with my military parent I finally do live with them and we’re all broke I have no money for things I can’t even get medication because I have to pay some one that acts like they care a hundred bucks rather than medicine that cost 30 bucks but hey America is the best country in the world as the amount of secrecy in USA is amazing and I don’t know why my parent went over to a place for freedom moment to pay bills for what ? a sad world indeed but hey as the world deteriorates use your selfi sticks for duck faces .
This is really accurate. I have BPD and have all of these symptoms and it's really hard to deal with and explain but this video sums it up in 3 minutes! Thanks a lot for the update!
I have BPD but from what I remember and what my parents told me, I had no traumas in the past.
Same for me but I might have an trauma I can't remember
Sometimes it can be a long and painful way to go to try to find where your trauma originate from. For my part i only discovered it a couple years ago. And it literally makes me depressive. I have to say that i self diagnose, which only makes things harder. But now im at peace with that part of my life (i have cut the links with the peoples who were responsible of it, was hard to do but totally worth it.) i hope for you that you can find if it’s really what you’re looking for and that you’re ready for it.
It can also be caused by genetics or chemical imbalance!
Trauma occurs in early years before the age of 3, so if u suffered trauma you probably don't remember
When you have experienced every single thing listed in this video and feel like it's a biography
After months of suspecting this, I got the diagnosis by my therapist a month ago. I was in awe, I used to think I was just a little over the top with my emotions, but all clicked & made sense.
I was diagnosed with BPD 2 weeks ago. Thank you for explaining this diagnosis in a way to me that is easy to digest and understand.
Yeah, one day id have one meal, and the other binging. Some days i hate my close friends. Some days i feel extremely confident. Idk really
thatcringey person For any concern, you should seek a doctor/psychologist for an accurate diagnosis. Some symptoms can easily be mistaken for other illness.
thank you for doing this! I really hope more people will learn about my disorder thanks to this video
Np! Thanks for watching and glad to see it serves some purpose!
Kristen Fuck you, all people with borderline personality disorder should hang themselves. You guys are nothing but human destroyers.
Dan Turcas Mhm, thanks. I don’t really care
Kristen Exactly, you horrible people only care about yourselves
Oh boi... I love people who generalize. :D
Blame countries because of one!
Blame a race because of one!
Blame a community because of one!
It's so fair, right?
i have BPD and it breaks me to say it
I dont wanna talk i just wanna say for the people suffering with BPD, is i love you so much.And you might think its bullshit to love some i dont know so much but i do and it makes my heart hurt to know that there is others feeling how i do. Im not here thinking you are just gonna get better form my useless word but they're are not useless because i really feel the pain that everyone is feeling through my heart so im gonna say this one more time. I love you, i dont know you but i love everything about you, you make me smile and cry and laugh without ever talking to you.It's hard to think that im not alone and that it's people who suffer like i do but there is and i love them for living everyday and smiling even when your unhappy and and loving without being able to feel all the love you get everyday.I love you even if you have a different face of name of love life of style everyday, hour, minute, or second. You could shoot me in the back and my love wouldn't stop.
please smile? for me please??
this is so cute ty for this, its so comforting knowing other people are feeling the same way and are as empathetic about it. we in this together frfr
“You could shoot me in the back and my love will not stop” :( I think it’s the BPD i have.
@@Biscochito_ suffer together we shall
@@godsgood9030 I understand the pain is real, and excruciating, but I hope we could encourage each other. Oh ... btw, I move away from the cause, yeah I decided to break up. Its 3 days torturing tho. I can’t eat and function normally. Only curled up fetus like. Cried n cried. And on the day 4. I met an “angel” in a comments section. We encourage each other, we check each other. And 2weeks after that I felt okay. Its not your BPD is the problem. Its our choice of unavailable partner that tortured Us. I’ve been cried and emotionally tortured for 10months. Now I’m gratefull I free my self from the trigger.
@@Biscochito_ yeah after 4 months i gave up.I let go of what i thought my soul mate was 2 months ago and im not gonna lie .I WAS THINKING OF BACKSLIDING.but instead i cut everyone off and started new.And now im a crazy cat/plant lady.
ig im glad but maybe im not
I have a genuine bpd diagnosis, everyone ends up dumping me and pushing me away because they don't understand.
Warrior Son it's a life ruiner.
Starscream91 you don't know the half of what I've been through. just because ive been in a few relationships, it doesn't equal to life happiness. my last relationship was physically and mentally abusive. sex doesn't have anything to do with anything.
Its hard to be around someone eho constantly hates on/ constantly idealizesq withoit thinking rationally...
I have bpd and never dated nor have I had sex and I'm 20.
Starscream91 thanks!
To everybody here struggling with Borderline Personality Disorder...
I have BPD, too. I was destructive, manipulative, angry... every stereotype of BPD there is. Finally, I was willing to try medication. After finding the most effective combination of antidepressants and mood stabilizers, I finally had an even-enough-keel to try treatment. Even though I was resistant, I sat through Dialectical Behavior Therapy for a year. Then one day it all clicked. I continued with Dialectical Behavior Therapy for four more years. I am proud to say that my 8 year anniversary of my last self-harm attempt is next week and I've been free from therapy for four years. Now I have loving, stable relationships and am a productive member of society, no longer leaving a path of destruction in my wake. Sometimes my symptoms bubble up, but I am able to deal with them in healthy and effective ways, and can keep myself from spiraling.
I understand the pain, the turmoil, the destruction. I understand the satisfaction, the ups and downs, the adrenaline from the back and forth. I get it and I'm telling you that you can get better. Please don't listen to the people telling you you're evil and shouldn't reproduce. Try not to listen to the people reinforcing all the horrible things in your head. I know it's difficult to believe, but they are wrong. There is hope and there is healing if you are willing to put your pride aside and surrender to treatment. I know we love the mess (or at least I found comfort in it), but it's so much better when you get help.
Just remember, as long as you keep waking up in the morning, you'll be okay. You're not alone in the way you feel and what you experience. You can heal and lead a wonderful life full of loving relationships. Hang in there
My uncle has bpd. When I used to live with him, he was always afraid that I would leave him. He was afraid of bieng alone. It was very difficult to talk to him. People with bpd see the world split. In a good way or in a bad way. My uncle often would say that people were out to get him. And he's been suicidal too. He would be angry with me, even though I didn't do anything wrong. For example, one day I cleaned the house and he complained that it was still dirty and ended up abusing me. He would often abuse drugs. He would use that to cope with it. And my uncle can't keep relationships very long. He would leave them. Because"I'm not good enough" He stopped going to therapy. Which made it worse. He took out his anger on me. He took advantage of me. He raped me. And I can't forget that. We were so close. That's why I encourage people to see a therapist if there not feeling well. I can only do so much. I'm not a therapist. But however, we can reach out for our loved ones. Because they are important regardless what they've been through.
Anaya Hardy I'm so sorry to hear that. Do you still live with him? Is he getting help today? How are you feeling today?
I'm sorry to hear that.
Anaya It sounds to me that he is just a terrible person using his emotional issues as a scapegoat for treating people badly. If indeed he is suffering from a mental disorder then he should be kept out of society and away from people he can harm. He is a dangerous and abusive person.
Anaya Hardy I'm sorry, but this made me concerned more about you. I hope now everything gets better and no bad thing happened to you anymore.
Edupz No. I don't live with him anymore. Thank God I don't. He's in jail. But for me, I now have ptsd. I have nightmares about him, and sometimes I feel suicidal. But I'm getting help though. So I feel a little bit better.
Thank you so much for having such good information, my girlfriend was diagnosed with BPD and this video helped me a lot to understand what she's going through, now a lot of things about her behavior make sense
Welcome to my world.
I'm crept out for myself while watching this. I saw myself. I remember that my therapist thinks that I'm on the borderline because of the things mentioned in this vid. She had me journal my thoughts, and I did. It felt like a conversation of two, and I as a listener/spectator. So we're like three. I can hear them, not audibly. But inside my head. Sometimes, I speak the dialogues out. I asked my therapist if I have split. She changed tone of speaking and just told me to not think about it as of the moment. I became so doubtful of myself since she told me that.
But hey, good news, I'm self-harm-free for 10months now 😊
I'd recommend looking into DID. It's often misinterpreted as BPD and/or schizophrenia. I thought I had BPD or schizo for a long time and I see myself in your comment.
Thats not good news thats great news.
wait a minute same-
You are loved!
I have Borderline since I am 8 or 9 and every year far to my 15th birthday it got worse. I had many Suicide attempts, was hurting myself everyday for years, lying to all my loved ones just to get their attention, stalked or threatend the ones I fell in love with, ruined multiple of my friend- or relationships and then lived in almost total isolation.
Once I was in a hospital for mental illnesses and the therapist told me I will never be able to have a normal, loveing relationship and you know? She was right. I never experienced someone who was able to deal with me or Borderline for longer than 1-2 years.
I got quite better after many years but I know Borderline will never go away. I just can learn how to live with it without getting my life destroyed again.
Your therapist told you that? I don't believe it. Nonsense. Many people even with severe BPD/MI find happy healthy relationships. Look to God to help you manage MI and better yourself, love, and believe that there very well may be someone out there who can handle your MI and will love you beyond it.
Spend a long time studying what healthy relationships are like and what healthy boundaries are. Persistence, patience, and determination CAN and WILL reduce your BDP. You are NOT broken, you have a poor internal foundation which CAN be fixed
Mau Chan Unbelievable. I don’t understand how is that person are consider qualified to be a therapist. Absolutely wrong. There are a lot of people with BPD that are able to form a loving relationship.
I struggle with BPD, and this video really helped me explain my condition to my friends and family. It's helped me become closer with them and has made life a little bit easier for me. Thank you for making this video. :)
ok so I have listed about 6 of these that I relate to:
- unstable relationships and images of people
- unstable sense of myself
- very highly changing moods
- feeling very empty
- stressed and paranoid almost always
- I feel cut off and view the world through a view as if it were a dull first person game
now I don't know if this means I have it but I'm a teenager and probably stupid and don't know what I'm saying but I'm kinda scared to ask my parents about it because they'd probably brush it off as an overreaction and joke about it 2 years from now saying "haha remember when he thought he had bpd oh you were so overreacting, honestly"
Same I also feel that way like I have the same symptoms and I'd really like to get it checked out but I'm also too scared to ask my mom because I don't want her to make fun of me or say something like "why would you have it?". I hope you are able to ask your parents if you can get it checked it out and if you do have it I hope you get the help you deserve for it!
@@ray_exists_maybe2033 thank you
Same but my dad asked me are you depressed multiple times and honestlyidk I just want to talk to somone
@@amyriley878 My advice is not to bottle emotions up. From experience, it is the worst thing you can do. Not talking to someone can be fatal. I know advice from a rando on the internet won't mean much but I implore you to talk to someone you trust if you feel depressed or in any state of anxiety.
@@amyriley878 if you ever need someone to talk to my Instagram is danki_kami
I'm always 'the weird one'. My family and my friends say that I'm differnet, 'unique' and that I'm 'still trying to find myself'. My mum once said 'You enjoy being different, right?! You like getting attention' and that was really hurtfull. I can relate to everything in this video, I think that I have BPD and I'm afraid that everyone is going to think I'm crazy. I'm afraid that I'm going to think I'm crazy
Both my boyfriend and I have BPD, it’s actually helped keep us both stabilised
After a 4 year struggle of misdiagnoses, today I finally saw a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with BPD.
I didn’t understand anything about it and everything he told me went in one ear out the other, I was so in shock I couldn’t pay attention. This video helped me so much understand better on what BPD is and how I can try to help myself. Thank you so much 💕
I have BPD and Bipolar Disorder i just have to deal with it. It's not easy. I wish I could have a relationship of any kind that would last!
Same :)))))
PsycHoe730 I have the same. But my boyfriend really loves me. I went away few times while I was with him, I've also tried to hurt him so much. I said that I didn't love him and worst things then I left. But he tried his best to find me in the city. He did. And now we're still together thanks to him. He knows my problem and I'm having a therapy to slove that, for him.
I hope you'll find someone as I did.
I've lost almost everyone around me because of that but it's going better since this year
You'll find someone that's perfect for you and understanding, I was diagnosed with BPD and my last relationships were very complicated, they thought i was dramatic and always overreacting, they couldn't understand why i was so over emotional and why i would act the way I would, but i luckily found a perfect man who even though didn't know what BPD was before he met me, tries to understand me and is very patient, not judgmental and helps me through a lot, i'm very thankful to have him in my life because Being with a person who has BPD isn't the easiest thing, so do not worry, you'll find someone who will accept you, and who will love you for who you truly are
Me too but I've sort of basically imposed a "Single pringle" life on myself because I don't think a relationship is right for me at the moment (get on it reddit and make "vocel" a thing!)
It's not because I don't want a boyfriend but my perception of myself is too warped and unstable right now.. It wouldn't be right to make someone else have to deal with my excess baggage atm.
Random Guy what do you mean by that ?
I have borderline personality disorder.. It sucks and I have my days where I just wanna just curl up and give up but I know I'm better than that and its easier for me to resist urges when I understand my own disorder. I did recently overcome addiction as well. Its been over 60 days and in going good. But just know... You arent alone.
Good luck...stay focused on this understanding and loving path for yourself and the world..youre very brave to have overcome addiction! :))
I also suggest doing mindfulness meditation and walking..
This explains a whole lot about why I am the way I am but I'm not gonna be able to find out if I have this because I cant go to psychologist so that 🤷♀️
Finally something that accurately summarizes what it's like to have BPD. Will be showing my boyfriend this! Thank you!
You know you’re depressed when the image at 0:16 appears more sinister than comforting...
(The brows are the eyes and the eyelids are bags)
oh god that’s creepy not sinister
That’s some high set eyes
I think it's the face... The eyebrows..
lmao dude
Every metal illness video I watch, I feel like I'm being described.
Yeah bullshit.
Metal illness? lol And your last name is Hetfield? That just makes me think you are trolling.
I’m happy you made this video because I had a doctors appointment today and even though I’m only ten I’m diagnosed with BPD and I just wanted to make sure that I was and now that I’ve watched this it’s made me realise how angry depressed and mournful I get.
for the past 5 years we thought i had depression. but after watching this video and relating to all the symptoms... maybe i’ve been misdiagnosed
same
Who else has a bpd Mom?
I have, thanx to her im bpd too.
@@dosto_viski8292 me too..
🙋🏾♀️
I can’t tell if I do but she definitely has something.
I think my dad has a bpd, aaaand i have it too🙃
Was diagnosed today. I feel more lost than when I thought it was just depression/anxiety.
Alexander Murad I think I have it💔I’ll have to ask my therapist
I am coming back onto this video to comment. I am not entirely sure if this was the exact video I saw though since there are multiple videos about BPD on this channel. Anyways, the video that I watched (years ago) happened to be on my recommendations page. I used to watch this channel often because I am interested in psychology and the videos are very informative. I was watching the video and I realized that I related to every single thing said. I brought it up to a therapist a few months later and BAM I actually do have it. If it were not for this video I would have felt more alone and wouldn't have gotten help for this. I am very grateful.
I'd love to see a video on DID. I want people to know that we're not monsters, and for people to not be scared of us ^^
TRIGGER WARNING: Assault and other terrible things.
When I was 11 I experienced a series of pretty traumatizing events that all derived from the same man. Miles, a 20 year old man. From my first encounter, I knew he would become a figure of terror in life. I didn't even know him until there were rumors of him between groups of us neighborhood kids. Stories of him stalking and scaring people seemed taboo. Until something worse happened to me. Riding around my neighborhood on my bike was something I had begun to do in my 11th year of living until he made his first appearance. Running up to my bike and violently grabbing the handle bars so I couldn't pedal away whilst asking me desperately for my number was how he decided to start our depressing relationship. Of course, being 11, I declined. He kept on and on and I began to get scared, people were watching and the guy still had the audacity to continue his begging. I began to cry. He stopped his ranting to me and asked me if I was scared, to which I said yes. He leaned in and grabbed me as I tried to push him away, that's when a group of guys about 16 began to yell at him to stop, screaming "It's just a little girl! Leave her alone!" I was shaking violently, clearly having some sort of a panic attack, sadly it wouldn't be my last from this guy. My second encounter with my new buddy was when I had just literally crawled out of a ditch. Whilst I was walking down the street to my friend who had gotten help for me I happened to look up. Locking eyes with the guy who made me cry. I told my friend to get away from him as he was about to cross the street to get to us. I screamed something along the lines of "GET AWAY OR I'LL CALL THE POLICE!" He stopped a moment to consider this and me and my friend began to walk in the opposite direction, thinking he'd leave. I look over my shoulder to see him full on sprinting at us. I shove my friend and scream run and she takes off. Me, being soaking wet in blue jeans wasn't able to get far and I had to watch my friend run away from me and the man. I heard his footsteps behind me as I struggled to run. (May I mention that it's broad daylight and we are screaming on an open street. Nobody opened their doors. Nobody.) I turned to throw my shoes at him as a last resort but they didn't hit him at all. In fact, he took his time to pick them up. I had run up to someone's front door and was banging on it crying, "PLEASE LET ME IN, PLEASE!" Nobody came to the door. He was significantly closer and I was forced into the corner of the entrance of this house that had no inhabitants. I looked to my left to see the still running figure of my friend, I was crushed. I began to shake again as he got closer to me, trying to block me from the view of it all. His right hand on the left side of my head, as to block me in. Let me just say that his face had absolutely no expression. There was no emotion, as though his eyes were glazed over. I began to cry as he asked me questions softly "What's your name? How old are you? Where's your phone? Can I have your number?" All this was happening as I sobbed and begged him to leave me alone. He didn't ever respond, he only asked me the questions over and over again. I can remember him saying "I know you. I know your name. I know you have a phone so give it to me." His questions fell on deaf ears as I cried louder. He asked me again if I was scared to which I cried saying yes. His hand that was next to my head reached down to my arm and pressed the fingernails into my skin to the point I thought I'd bleed. I can't even begin to describe the dread I felt as I watched his face looking intently into my eyes as he watched me cry harder now because of the pain he was inflicting on me. He tried to lean in for who knows what but I finally managed to push him away. He freaking asked "Why don't you want me to touch you?" Anyways, when he was done watching me cry and shake he backed away and apathetically said "Goodbye."
Cue my 3rd encounter. I was riding home from school with my older brother when I saw the sidewalk had wet cement and so I went to it to draw a heart. My brother just wanted to get home and continued on. I glanced to my left to see my brothers head being slammed into his handle bars as he tried desperately to kick the man pinning him down. Guess who the man was? Miles. His arm was dramatically raised over my brothers head with what looked like a stick. I began to scream bloody murder at Miles which stopped him for a moment, enough for my brother to kick him and pedal off. I immediately went after him and we got home safely. But Miles had also walked to our house and was looking through the windows. I was in the back room shaking violently and crying my eyes out. "WHY WONT HE LEAVE US ALONE?! HES GOING TO KILL ME!" Long story shortened, some guy in a truck saw the whole thing and the police were called. They showed up very quickly, thankfully. When I looked out my window at the array of police cars that littered the street, I saw him. Sitting on my curb in front of my house petting my cat. I just wanted him gone, I didn't want to see him ever again but I continued to watch. A police woman comes up to him and asks if he has any weapons. He says yes, pulling up his shirt to reveal, not only one, but two 6 inch fillet knives. Turns out the thing over my brothers head was a knife. I cried again. I was so tired of feeling so broken by this guy, I just wanted him in jail or somewhere else. I watched him get in a police car and drive away. "It's okay." I thought. "He's gone now." But, he came back to his house about a couple days later. "He's insane. We can't arrest him. It wouldn't be fair. We can't put him in an asylum against his will." That's what the police said. Guess what else they said. I can't get a restraining order, "he's ill, it's not right." I digress, in conclusion, he knows where I live and my only option, as provided by the police, was to move.
Anyway. I began having bpd after these events. I'm scared of too many things now. And somewhere deep down inside, I feel as though I'm going to die by his hand. I still live in that house, in that neighborhood in that territory that he stills walks.
Thank you for your time reading this. One day I'll feel better or something. Who knows, really.
Delaney Renee That is so not right,how can they not do smth when you are in such danger? I hope everything goes well for you honey,I have a similar situation from when my father is drunk so I understand.When he is a little girl personality comes out and she hides,cries and shakes violently(I have DID).Thank you for sharing your story,I hope things will go better for you♥♥♥
Delaney Renee I'm so sorry. That man was absolutely deranged and you did not deserve to be in that situation. The police should have arrested him, or put him in an asylum. If you can't move then it's just going to cause more havoc. I'm so sorry, you poor thing
X.BrookeNoel.X and HoneyConeCake
Thank you both so very much. I wish you both the best as well. I'm doing alright. ☺️
Re nee it's stories like this people need to hear about people with bpd. They need to realize that we more often than not have been through TRAUMATIZING events that led us to become this way, instead of just shaming us.
Hailey Railey
Exactly. I didn't choose to differentiate my own mind against my will.
Was married to a diagnosed bpd. Super abusive physically and emotionally. Even told our families that I was abusive to her after I left and then denied doing so even after I sent her a text she sent to my mom saying just that.
Gas lighting to an extreme, pretty much all of the stuff about reckless spending/sex was true about her...just an impossible situation
jn6305 Im in the process of leaving my wife Because of the exact same reason I was starting to get scared :( and i feel so bad for having to leave her Because I truly love her but it cannot go on we were both destroying ourselves ;( it hurts horribly to leave her
BPD is often misdiagnosed constantly and given wrongly to people who actually have other mental health issues. She sounds more like someone with ASPD if she is both physically and emotionally abusive, gaslighting and impulsive.
Even though impulsivity is a BPD trait it's a common trait in sociopaths, bipolar, people with adhd and other mental illness where impulsivity is a big problem.
Sounds like she has Narcissistic Personality Disorder or something similar
FaktFitness I also went through utter hell with one of these types. I lost everything, my children, my family, my home. These are are very dangerous indivuduals who care little about the devastation they leave in their wake.
Hope you’re doing better man.
After I had received my full diagnosis, my psychiatrist sent me this channel. It’s helped my family and even myself understand the disorders I deal with.
How can I help my friend who is going through depression and guilt??
The horse taetae rode in hwarang *BTS trash* , try to get them professional help.
The horse taetae rode in hwarang *BTS trash* The best thing you can do is make it clear you're there for them and that you like them for who they are... when I'm depressed I feel like I'm burdening everyone around me and push people away as to not be a bother. Sometimes I just really need to be reminded that despite my mental disorders and depression and all there's always someone there for me and that I'm not burdening everyone around me. If they need to vent be the ear they need, but if not make it clear they don't have to, and I've found when I'm depressed I just need a distraction from my self deprecating mind. I'm probably just rambling by this point, but I hope I am of some help to you ^^
show interest and listen to them
There isn't a right or wrong answer, but you can always try to get them to talk things out, and if possible see if they would like to consult a professional depending on the degree and problems.
The horse taetae rode in hwarang *BTS trash* Talk with him/her. Try to understand. Tell how much you care about him/her. Depressed people usually want to hear "I love you" "I care about you". And never ignore or leave him/her. That hurt's.
A girl I knew in high school had such server BPD and bipolar disorder that she only existed in either happy giddy or suicidal depression. She also had panic attacks just being in choir.
I was recently diagnosed with BPD, and they gave me a bunch of wrong diagnosis, like bipolar disorder, manic depression, severe anxiety, reactive attachment disorder, and a bunch of others
Kill3r M3 me too. I was diagnosed with adhd, then bipolar then a final diagnosis of BPD
They're all extent similar
I have BPD ptsd, generlized anxiety and panic disorder
Bi polar and manic depression are the same thing
Universal Flower not necessarily Bipolar *Type I* is manic depression but Bipolar usually refers to Bipolar *Type II* which is more aggressive and deluded than depression
I was misdiagnosed for years as well. It's hard having to relearn a lifetime of thought processes.
Got diagnosed with BPD 3 years ago and since then have been in DBT, can say it really helps a lot. What gets frustrating the most is having people try to say I dont have BPD but I'm Bipolar. Both conditions have so many related symptoms but the major ones with being Bipolar, I dont show nor do I genuinely feel I show them.
It’s also important to know about Complex-PTSD
My notifications brought me here.
Having BPD and Anxiety...
Ugh the pain
@Alyxendrr Paezaneo how the fuck do you know that? You don't know this person whatsoever. And while self diagnosing is dumb, it doesn't mean they don't have it.
Thank you for the video! I have a friend with BPD caused by a traumatic childhood event and I went here to learn more about his condition.
I’m here because I may have it 😞
Lilly Lynne self diagnosing is difficult unless you take psych
Martin Goddard I’m aware I hav’nt been to a phycologist lately
Lilly Lynne well, good luck! Stay positive.
4Gotten Tobe wow bro thats uncalled for
4Gotten Tobe tf
I REALLY REALLY need to go to the doctor and get a therapist... This is really like me I suddenly change from happy, to suicdical or to mad from happy I just get temper alot and I cry because I think my life is the stupidest worst thing ever
Despite all the videos on BPD that i’ve watched. I still find it hard to comprehend. It’s way to similar to bipolar but more frequent? The symptoms are also too minor that there isn’t really one big deciding factor to confirm BPD. So far what i’ve got is abandonment issues, black and white perspective, and worthlessness. They’re the big symptoms.
The issue is that BPD is one of the most situational and odd personality disorders due to the fact it changes quickly and rapidly, it’s like bipolar in the regard that it can go up and down. But the main difference is that Bipolar is often consistent whereas BPD isn’t. Also notably missing in the video are the two types, outward BPD which is when you often violently express the lows you feel or the highs you get. And inward BPD where you direct that energy more towards yourself rather than people around you; making it elusive but it still puts a strain.
@@feldmarschallvonbraunschwe4463 that’s quite insightful. Thank you!
I have this thing guys. I got diagnosed with it two years ago. I live in Russia and nearly no-one knows about this illness here. I was lucky enough to find a nice specialist who figured out what it was. Usually bpd is mistaken to be bipolar disorder and lots of patients are constanly receiving sedative drugs so they won't be too active and won't hurt themselthes. In my country mental ilnesses are not considered to be something serious until you start hurting someone else apart from yourself and that is really scary. I wish there would be more videos like this in English and Russian for people to finally realise how hecking hard it is to live when you can't control your own emotions. Thank you for your job, keep it up!
One moment I'm a pickle, the other I'm screaming at my feet.
What a crazy world we live in, eh?
But.. can it be cured? Or is it something you live with for the rest of your life ?
Follow-up studies consistently indicate the diagnosis of BPD is a chronic condition, although the number of individuals
who continue to meet diagnostic criteria slowly decreases over the life span.
Al yami Saleh Well I've been diagnosed for about 5-6 years, but I think I developed at a young age. I'm still working on managing myself constantly through therapy and meds. There's not really a way of being "cured", as is the case with most mental illnesses, but therapy is usually what helps you learn to live life peacefully
Mental disorders can't be cured
Wagwanpopadom not all of them
I heard a lot of people who say they have been cured from depression.
Some disorders are temporary, some are not, it all depends. Also anyone can get them at any time. Kinda like cancer, they can be controlled, or go into remission. In some sense mental disorders can't be cured in the same way that physical health problems can't be cured. You can only treat causes and symptoms.