You have given so many people hope by posting this video. The best thing any parent can give their children is a happy marriage. I know if Gains and Brooks could tell you, they would thank you for caring enough about each other to keep trying. Love you and hoping for the best for all of you.
Four years ago I found your channel and instantly fell in love and looked up to you guys as the PERFECT couple. Today I fell in love with you guys all over again as the most REAL example of true love. It’s not always pretty, it’s hard, and sometimes it just plain sucks. But you guys are fighting the good fight for each other and for your family. Thank you for allowing us to see this side of you - the world (and RUclips) needs more of this ❤️
I had to pause this at 6:08 to write this comment. I don’t think I have ever seen a man cry. Not my dad, not my brother in law, no boyfriend or friend. To see you cry first brought tears to my own eyes. Secondly, it made me feel a weird sense of relief. I am proud of you for showing your emotions because it is not easy no matter who you are. But being able to show them, to others, that might be feeling similar emotions is a wonderful thing you are doing with the platform you have. I have nothing but endless prayers and love for both of you. I know words might be hard right now but I, as well as many others, have the utmost faith in both of you and I hope you can carry that with you some days. I love y’all.
Cullen looks totally crushed I think you guys need a holiday break away from social media go away and just enjoy yourself as a family we will all be here when you get back don’t let social media destroy your marriage love and huge hugs sent xxxx
Valentine I agree! I haven’t watched RUclips in months and I came back recently and he has lost weight also so you can tell he is stressed and going thru things
It hurts my heart to see all of the people in the comments also struggling from depression, but it just shows what a positive impact you guys have by sharing your story.
Our Heavenly Father, we pray that you wrap your loving arms around Cullen and Katie during this time. Let them stay close to you so that they walk beside you each and everyday. We pray for their precious family and that they all know and feel your love. Heal them dear Lord and let them know that they are precious. Guide them during every moment in their lives so that they will be a light to each and every one of us. Our Father, use Cullen and Katie to always be as one, and allow them to be the positive voice to help others who might be going through the same situation. They are so very special to many dear Lord. Let them know how much they are loved. Cullen and Katie, you and your family will be in our prayers. Let God be your strength. When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles - Psalms 34:17
I don't understand some of these comments. why the hell watch if u don't agree with their life? I know everyone is in titled to their own opinion but this wasn't the video to be throwing out rude insensitive comments. Katie is absolutely right and should block and delete those who disrespect her family. This is the most real and raw video I've seen yet. That took mad courage. I don't think u should stop u utube what so ever that just shows how uneducated society is about this. yall working and being with each other 24/7 doesn't make a difference. It's a chemical imbalance. I've read these comments the last 3 videos, "stop utube" "get real jobs". why u watching then? I and thousands of others appreciated u both for having the strength to do this. Much love and respect to ur family from mine.
Debbikins it's true, though. How can she expect her husband to stay interested in her when she let herself go and put on so much weight. She needs to take responsibility.
OhOh ItsMagic let's face it, we all have at some point, life happens, but while he is dealing with his issues she is the one taking care of everything and everyone else, we all lose track sometimes, and you cannot sit there and tell me that you are perfect because I know better
EatPlums This is what I hate about people like you! The majority of men are always taught to be strong! If they cry, they are considered weak etc! That mindset can make it so much worse! Stereotypes on both women and men isn’t okay! Gender stereotypes can cause so much harm and bullying could happen too! I love how Cullen is expressing his emotions because of how brave it is! It isn’t always easy to talk about what is going on in your life and what is troubling you! Talking in front of a camera would be even more difficult again! Both Cullen and katie have been through so much, depression is ruthless as well which doesn’t help! It can take hold of anyone regardless of their situation! Society doesn’t need to have all those rules! Everyone has emotions and everyone should be allowed to express them! Keeping your emotions bottled for too long isn’t healthy either! Your emotions aren’t too “feminine or too “oprah-ish” and it’s not embarrassing! If you can talk to someone you can trust then that can help too!
A strong marriage requires loving your spouse even in those moments when they aren't being loveable ; it means believing in them even when they struggle to believe in themselves. 💕 Prayers to your family .
If only all bloggers were this honest, the rest of the world would realise that no one has a completely rosy life, and wouldn't beat themselves up comparing themselves with people who on the outside appear to have the perfect life. No one does, all relationships take work, a lot of work! You guys can do this!
Wow did you 2 ever nail this. 100% Guys you are very much on the road to recovery now. You will stumble but you are going to make it. I too was completely in your shoes. I'm healed. It always seems impossible until you have beaten it. YOU WILL BEAT IT.
That Chicken Purse Chick just because they are speaking about it doesnt mean all is well inside...Take chester bennington from linkin park who spoke to everyone about depression however inside he was still a mess.
Hi guys. Depression is dibiltating. I don't care who you are. I lived 30 years in depression. I'm 41. Self-harm for a good 20 years. I'm on medication, a lot of it. You'll get better Cullen. Keep talking with Katie. Don't close up and leave the ones who love you out. They love you and care. Hugs to you both!
If love and touch is Katie's love language, Cullen, it's important you give her what she needs. Just as it's important she gives you what your love language is. :)
At first I felt bad for you guys and then when you started talking about your feelings and thoughts.. I realized I’m going through the same thing. I definitely needed to see this so thank you 😔
Cullen and Katie you are both incredible people. You are so brave, honest and allow yourselves to be vulnerable, all admirable qualities. Thank you for sharing your experiences with depression, it can only help break the stigma of mental health. I have been in that same dark, isolative place that you described. It is a scary place and self harm did come to my mind. Thanks to the love of my two children I sought intensive help and I’m happy to report the dark place is a distant memory. God Bless and keeping you in my prayers. It was a relief to finally see you guys today!!!!!
Thank you for this. Thank you for being so open and honest and explaining how you’re working through things both individually and together. I don’t look up to you and your family because you’re perfect, I watch and admire you because you’re not and neither am I and sometimes it helps to see how genuinely good, committed people deal with everyday things. Some inspiration and role modeling for the rest of us :)
Thank you for being brave enough to make this video. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, but I admire you both so much for sitting down and talking openly about depression and what you’re going through. You have an army of friends and family and FANS who are rooting you on. ❤️
For the past several years I've asked God for a word for the year. One year it was Balance. I was like ya, I need more balance in my life and I tried to work on that. This year the word he gave me was ARK. Like Noah and the Ark. I got to thinking about that story and realized how we have glamorized it and made it so cute with the animals walking 2 by 2 etc. What you forget is that they were on that boat for a LONG time filled with stinky animals and a whole lot of crap. Rocking and rolling. All they probably wanted was off that dang boat BUT God had a plan and knew in order to be saved they had to stay in the boat. Stay in the boat Cullen and Katie. Run to Jesus. Give him everything you've got. ((((HUGS))) and prayers coming your way!!!
Oh, you guys I relate to this so much. I felt very similar after Irene & never talked about it either really. And it can be so hard on a marriage and so hard when you are trying to vlog your life and you're in such a public space. We have disappeared a few timse because in a lot of ways RUclips can be helpful but also really challenging. I just wish I could crawl right in through the camera and hug you both! We're here for you if you ever want to talk and we care about you so much.
Hi Sudden Kimpact I have been so glad to see youz back, and your carZZZZZ drama OMG You are super hero's , thats when you just look up to the sky and say WHAT IS GOING ON ....wooooooo
there is still SO much stigma around depression and anxiety. SO MUCH. and SO MANY even when people are able to take that brave leap and admit that they're depressed, there's even more stigma about feeling like they should be able to get out of it really quickly once you admit it and start working on it. it can take years to get out of a bad depression. and that's OKAY!!!!!!!!! thank you so much for being brave and for being honest, that is the only way things will start to change!
I do hope you realize how many people you may have helped by posting this video.....I know the video was made to let your subscribers know about 'what's going on" (as if it's any of our business!) I don't watch a lot of family you tubers but of the 4 or 5 I do watch you are THE MOST REAL couple I have ever seen.....and I want to thank you for that....people have to know that some of the family vloggers who's lives are shown as always good, always happy, always fun.....are not real life. So my wish is for continued healing for your family b/c we, your subscribers, will be here for whatever you need to do for you!
So proud of you guys for putting the light on this! My husband suffered from deep depression after a losing his job when we were first married. I had no idea how to help and took his sadness personally. Things deteriorated so much we talked about divorce daily. We decided to PRAY & Get therapy together. Prayer and therapy really was able to heal us from the inside out and now I feel like I understand depression so much more and will be better prepared when/if it comes up again. Sending big hugs and prayers to you two!❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have almost hit call to my doctor about 10 times this last week. I am struggling. Being a mom of 2 has hit me HARD. I snap at my toddler just like you were saying. I wanted to throw in the towel on my marriage countless times in the last 6 months. Its such a scary place to be. Thinking I can’t be a mom I’m not cut out for it. I just want to lay in bed all day, if I could I would. But tomorrow morning I will call. You made me feel like it’s ok to not be ok. ❤️
Just an opinion here (and I haven't read any others so if there are others that said this same thing, sorry!)...but if you "almost hit call" to your doctor because of your struggle ...I think you SHOULD. There is NO SHAME in saying "Hey, I need help".
Words to describe you both... Brave, Strong, Faithful, Compassionate, Loving, Amazing, Honest, REAL, Relatable, Humble, Graceful.... seriously could go on and on about the GOOD things about you both. I don’t know the details of the situation and neither does anyone else, nor should anyone, marriage is intimate and some things like Katie said need to stay between the two of you. BUT although I don’t know the details, I can tell that no matter the issues you guys CAN get through this! I pray you both hold tight to your faith and constantly remind yourselves why you love each other! I pray your relationship comes out stronger after this valley.... God can use the ugliest times of our lives and make something beautiful! Thank you all for being to authentic, you two are very special people! You have no idea how many people you are probably helping by making these videos! Thank you, and may God bless you both!
Sometimes self harm and suicidal thoughts aren't what you think.. some people get to the point of not caring when they're in the car to wear their seat belt and don't care if something happens.. and it's terrifying when you're in the grips of that mental monster. Cullen, I'm so happy you're getting the help you need and the help Katie and the kids deserve. Praying for you guys.
Jenna Filbert Agreed! I'm currently getting help for PPD and PPA and looking back it got to a point where I would spend entire car trips trying to figure out if there was a way I could drive into oncoming traffic and my children be ok but me be gone. I would have sworn up and down that I wasn't suicidal but it would start as a thought and I would mindlessly hop on that thought train and over time it turned into almost a subconscious desire that would be forgotten the moment I got out of the vehicle
I understand this alot...with the depression everyone used to ask me why you depressed, there has to be a reason....but most of the time there wasn't a reason everything was right and great but I was depressed Y'all are great, hope youll heal during this time, and hope the depression will loosen it's grip.
Simply RaeAnn agreed... alot of people end up beating themselves over it when it's something they for the most part cant control without some sort of help whether that be talking to someone or medication. I know it's very hard to open up about depression cuz negativity can make it worse.
Angel Mae Ive had this to, it wasnt very bad or something, I kept going with things like school, but on the inside I felt soooo.... sad/depressed, most beacus I didn't feel good with myself, I wasn't happy with how I look and am. Than I found something I like to do, actually 2: I started playing guitar and I started doing more fun things with my friends. I feel better now, I still sometimes feel like that, but than I have something to get over it, I just think about coming home and do things I love, and I realized that other things don't mather.
Mental health is so easy to brush under a rug, but mental health is soooo important. Neither one of you are alone. Praying hard for your family! It gets better. You have God on your side and you’re willing to fight, I would say this is a great day to be alive. 💙
My husband and I have been really struggling with this lately for the past few weeks, and I really needed this. Thank you for showing this vulnerable side of your lives. Sincerely wish nothing but the best for you both and your sweet family.
There is a obvious love for each other. You can get through this, I think a big help would be just give up the camera for a couple months and just work on yourselves. You can’t do this with cameras on all the time. Like you said youtube makes everyone seem perfect, No one is and it really is sad fans think that.
TinaBallina Maybe it’s time to go look for jobs outside of youtube. There is no way they can heal their relationship with cameras running all the time.
I came across this video through suggested videos of other family vloggers that I’ve been watching on and off lately. I used to follow you guys three years ago, when I was with my ex. My depression was so bad that I almost failed out of college, I could barely work at my amazing job, and my relationship was garbage. But your videos, along with Ellie and Jared, gave me an out. In the way that when I was feeling hopeless about life, I would watch your videos and feel okay about where I was. You guys gave me hope for my future. Cullen, please know that your dedication to showing the internet your life is what helped pull me out of my depression years ago. I still love you guys. You have an amazing support in Katie and you will learn how to be yourself with this.
This past Thursday my 17 yr old cousin took her own life. She was a senior in high school, top 10 in her class, and ready to serve God. My Family is beyond heartbroken she had just started therapy and getting help. She did everything in her will to help others and she was so outspoken and strong willed. She did everything she set her mind to. Today we laid her to rest and the amount of love and support shown by our Family, Friends, her Friends, Teacher and community was so over whelming and amazing. But I urge you to seek help if you need it. Someone wants to listen and someone does care. It’s okay to admit you are not okay.
I am so very sorry for your loss.....praying that you and your family know comfort and strength at this time.....I lost my best friend in the summer, I know how painful grief can be 😓 Sending much love, many hugs and prayers 🙏🏻💕
Oh, my gosh! Thank you for you honesty. I think there are a few other RUclipsrs should make this realization and face the truth. Many women have done it, but never men.
I was crying at your montage at the end. We are so lucky that you have decided to share your lives with us. We have missed you but take all the time you need xxxx
I honestly don't know what to say about this video because we see you guy's all happy and prefect but then you go off camera we have no idea what's going on then to see this video it is sad to see you guys struggling with depression and your relationship so I hope you guys can figure things out and I hope you know that we love and care about you guys.
I have been watching you guys since before Gaines was born and I am so proud to see how far you guys have come!! You’re an amazing family!! You are very brave for being able to open yourself up to everyone about such a personal subject!! What passage were you guys before the video? Love you guys so much and just stay strong!!❤️
First time watcher! Forever subscriber! I too suffered in the past with depression and anxiety. What non-sufferers don’t comprehend is that this is a sickness just like cancer or high blood pressure or diabetes. As a Christian it’s awesome that you have such a huge platform to reach others going through this very thing. In my personal opinion I feel that God may “allow” this journey in your life because of your obedience and willingness to share such a private part of your life. Praying for nothing but good for you both here on out.
Been watching y'all since before you were pregnant with Gaines, and I had just had my baby girl a few months before you had Gaines. I also had a baby boy about a month before you had Brooks, so it feels like I'm seeing an alternate reality of my life, haha (also, I'm originally from Vestavia - now living in FL). I relate to this video so much. I had severe PPD the entire first year of my son's life, and it put a huge strain on my and my husband's relationship. I'm finally starting to come out of that darkness, and my husband and I are working on a lot of the same things you guys are. Rooting for y'all. Take time off if you need it. We will always wait!
hello. i’m not a regular watcher but i’ve seen a few videos of yours and stumbled upon this. you all probably won’t read this but i just wanted to share my story. i’ve battled depression for the past two years. the most difficult part is the feeling of i have nothing to be upset about or maybe i’m just sad. it’s fluctuated some months weeks even days good others horrible days where i didn’t get out of bed and had horrifying thoughts. right now i’m good but i’m so scared that this won’t last. things are hard for me right now and i’m worried i might crumble soon. seeing this i realized that getting help isn’t a sign of weakness. it means your strong. i will be telling my friend tonight and trying to get up the courage to get help. so thank you for sharing. the impact of it is probably more than your realize. thank you
Y'all need to work on spending more time as a couple. Kids especially toddlers take a huge toll on a marriage. My husband and I have had 2 stillborns and we have 5 living kids. I've also had a major surgery. Marriages go through ups and downs and we have been where y'all are now. Katie forgiveness is the hardest to do but it is totally worth it. Hugs to both of you. Forget the haters. Y'all have a lot of fans praying for you ;)
I’m loving this.. somewhere in the middle still.. My Gabriel suffered clinical depression, and explained it just like you are. It’s not the circumstance. He was wonderful, and adamant in telling me it wasn’t me.. I wasn’t to blame. It was a struggle for both of us, but we just kept at it. He got meds and counsel that, after many miss-mixes, that finally helped. He was my heart I just couldn’t ever give up on, just as he never gave up on my package. Thank you for coming to us, and sharing, talking to us as friends. We’ll be here to listen, and travel this journey with you. ❤️❤️🙏
Praying so hard for you guys! We know first hand what you are both dealing with. It's so hard, and a lot of people don't understand. Thank you for talking openly about this though because a lot of people don't.
Cullen I am sorry you are going through this now. The book of Psalms helped me in my darkest hour. David had a lot of bad things going on around him yet his prayers to God we’re beautiful and comforting to all of us that “go through the valley of the shadow of death”. I am praying for you.
I hope you feel better Cullen. My heart breaks seeing how much weight you have lost. You are clearly in deep pain and I pray that the new medicine helps. Don’t feel pressured to vlog right now. Maybe y’all need to step back and take a break from RUclips for a while . Heal your family. That’s the priority.
The scariest thing for me was wondering will I ever be me again?!?!? Cullen I am me again and I am happy, now I have good days and bad but not because of depression, just real life. Praying for y'all. Just remember this is your testimony this is what you can use to help someone else. Reach out to Jesus he is there.
Have you thought about having hormone levels checked? I went through something similar to this and I had a severe deficiency in vitamin D as well as other things that could mimic depression. Keep up the forward movement you will make it through.
Nikita Embree I was going to comment the same thing. Getting hormones and vitamin/mineral levels checked, when dealing with depression, should be the first step.
Taking Vitamin D supplements totally surprised me, made me feel so much better physically and mentally. Good idea to get a good physical exam and blood work if you haven't already.
You guys are amazing. Thank you for being so raw and real. There is such a sigma on depression that no one wants to talk about, and y'all getting this out there is going to help so many people! Praying for you both!
You should do research on food to eat to fight depression, food intake is a big part of depression. Also doing outdoor activities & getting fit helps sooo much.
Anxiety is a very lonely feeling because you don’t feel safe en secure in your own mind and body and you can n’t run away of it. I know so too. Believe me, time will come that you see the light again and feel the colors and peace as well again. Be patience and be kind to yourself. You two are the best! 💞😚
Wow! I am SO proud of you both for speaking about this! You both have helped me to not be ashamed of suffering from life’s curve balls. I’ve had a hard almost 3 years. Loss of....my Dad, my Mom, my dog, my father-in-law, my daughter’s miscarriage. Happiness in finding my husband’s birth family(he was adopted). All these things gave me stress, anxiety, and sadness. I do relate and realize it’s ok to talk about it. Thank you Cullen and Katie❤️!
"Choose joy, choose this, take a walk.." just that entire statement, Katie, is everything I wish my family & friends heard. I wish they knew that and understood that. Of course I can wake up and choose to feel happy. But the chemical imbalance.... the missing parts of my mind that cause the depression, can overpower that choice to "feel happy." -- I'm new to your channel but I struggle with MDD and I really appreciate you being open about it. It's tough. It's not fun. It's HARD. It's frustrating. Battling something that isn't always physically seen is difficult. But then there are people like you who choose to share this and be open and let others (like myself) know that they're not alone. Thank you Cullen and Katie. My heart goes out to you both, and my prayers are with you. My husband and I went through counseling last year. My depression & anxiety got really bad and it was affecting our relationship. We originally went together for myself and then it turned into working together and it improved our relationship so much. We are so much closer now. And while it was difficult for myself and for him, I loved being so open and close with him. It was a long time coming but I do not regret it one bit and I am not ashamed of it. There is nothing more important that making sure your loved one knows that you love them, even if it means counseling or something...ya know? You guys are so awesome for sharing all of this.
I have been dealing with horrible postpartum depression and it has taken a HUGE toll on my relationship with my fiancé. Seeing people be so open and so real about these hard times but continue to drive towards happiness helps in ways you that you have no idea. Thank you so much Katie and Cullen. God bless and I hope you find peace and happiness. ❤️
Thank you for being so open about what you’ve been dealing with. Several close people to me suffer with depression, but your description of it helps me understand what their going through better. I appreciate that. This will help countless others who are going or will go through similar experiences. You will be made stronger than ever for fighting for what is right than giving up. God bless you!
I'm new to your channel. I've see/heard of you through other family vloggers. It's refreshing to see "real" talk instead of choosing to hide what's going on in your life, like some other channels. Your viewers are not entitled to know your personal business, but just saying something is happening/has happened is enough. Show casing the "everything is wonderful all the time" is destroying the minds of the younger generation watching vlogs. Using your platform to teach them about something very important in lift is to be commended. I appreciate your honesty and am a new subbie because of it. I retired from the mental health field and it amazes me how many people don't know that the mind is very complex in how we process. We all are capable if losing it in a snap; depends upon the trigger. I'm so glad that you both are seeking treatment and pray that God blesses you, your family and friends. You need your entire support team during this time.
I’m so proud of how strong you are being able to open up the way you did in this video! I’ve battled depression and anxiety since the age of 14, it took me 5 and a half years to find the right medication, so many trials of different drugs, talking to psychiatrists, and multiple hospital stays, it was one of the hardest things of my life. But once I found that right medication I’ve never felt better. I’ve been on it for a year and a half now and I’m finally living my life! No matter how low the lows are, one day the highs will be so high and you’ll feel back on top of the world again. Keep pushing through, you have such great support and I know you can do it. Lots of love ❤️
Sometimes these things come out of nowhere. I went through a really hard time last year where I went from being so happy and fine.. to being struggling to keep myself on the earth. It’s so good to know that you’re not alone. Especially people I look up to.. it’s inspiring that you were able to share your story. Thank you so much, it might not seem like it, but this video is motivation for me ❤️
I totally respect y’all for this! In 2016 me and my husband and father to my son went through this we split up for a whole year and it was the hardest year of our lives we tried moving on after trying to make it work for so long and it didn’t work. We realised the beginning of 2017 we couldn’t live without each other and we should just make it work and put our differences aside. Now we are happier than ever and putting god first in our marriage. This made my heart so happy. Thank y’all for posting this part of your lives as well! We love you guys!
Y'all aren't alone. I'm proud of y'all for sharing. This past year has been rough for my husband and I as new parents and PPD and PPA. Communication between my husband and I has brought us so far. I hate that y'all are in a difficult season, but it's comforting to know we aren't the only ones to have been there and working through depression.
You guys are so real ❤️ and I appreciate your honesty. My husband and I both suffered from post pardon depression and we fought all the time. We are working through it, and it is one of the hardest things! I appreciate you opening up the door for this conversation and helping others! I truly believe this is going to help someone else.
Just barely started the video but I wanted to say I have always admired y’alls relationship. The support and love you have for each other is genuine. Thank you for bringing light to depression
I admire y'all so much for making this video. My 2 boys are almost exactly the same ages as Gaines and Brooks. My husband and I have been married for 4.5 years. Our oldest was born at 34 weeks and it was one of the scariest days of my life. Before that, we had a loss at 20 weeks and I never thought I could ever feel that low again. After my youngest was born, I got so overwhelmed with being a mom and a wife that I just shut down. Alot of counseling, along with medication, helped so much. I went back to school in August 2016 and I'm getting ready to graduate as a registered nurse in May. The last 2 years have been so hard on our marriage. I have day where I tell my husband "I can't do this by myself. You need to come home because me by myself with 2 toddlers is gasoline on a fire right now." Keep praying. And stick together. Y'all are an inspiration to me in my marriage and my parenting. No one is perfect. You don't owe it to us or anyone else yo explain every detail of what's going on. You have to continue to do what's best for the 4 of you. That's what matters. It's ok to be done, if you really need to be done. I am the same way that I believe in fighting for it. Y'all are awesome. Prayers for y'all everyday.
You have no idea how much I admire and respect you both for posting this. It helps in so many ways. It’s so hard to define what depression is and how it affects you. It lies beneath everything you do - quietly and unsuspectingly. And because it’s always there, you don’t realize how much it takes away from your life. To be so supportive and aware of each other is so beautiful. By sharing this you really help so many people! Me included. Thank you so much! I send you love and support. I hope you find your heart and happiness again. Don’t stop trying......you are loved 💗
You guys are going the right direction. I have struggled with depression, anxiety and self harm and the first step to get help is so hard. The fact that you are both supporting each other is huge. Good luck with everything and stay strong. ❤️
I UNDERSTAND. ....I have felt this way after the death of my husband mainly from dealing with his illness....he suffered from Alzheimer's Disease for 13 years and I was his caregiver...Many times in life we are very vulnerable and we need to take time to deal with the pain and take ALL the help we can get from every source. ...counseling, medication, prayer.....and friendships and love....that is where I come in ....I love you guys, I will pray for you and I am grateful for the progress you have made....TALK, TALK, TALK......LOVE TO YOU !!
My mother took her own life a few years ago and I have battled postpartum depression. Mental health is my sore point, my fight, and my passion. Prayers for you guys and thank you for shedding a light on mental health and I pray your light gets brighter.
I have PPD too and it's so hard. It's so so hard. Thank you for this video, and for saying out loud the things that people who are struggling are so scared to say.
It seems to work for Ellie and Jared on two days behind it will work for you to. Please know when I was fighting depression I started to watch Ellie and Jared that how I met you guys I couldn't stop watching you guys because you guys bright light to my life. If it wasn't for Ellie and Jared and you guys I Probaly wouldn't got through it lot easier. I want to thank your family for being who you are. I be praying for you guys and love you guys keep your chin up
This is so timely and thank you so much for sharing. My husband has been going through major depression for over 3 years, including several hospital visits. I had a Liver-Kidney transplant 3-1/2 years ago. Between these two life-changing events our marriage has suffered greatly. We are just starting to try and see if there is anything left of it. We have been married almost 27 years. So, thank you for being open and honest about mental health and marriage struggles.
Thank you so much for sharing all of this. I know it must be difficult to lay all of your business out there for everyone to know, but you have no idea how much you can help someone else by sharing your own experiences. I have dealt with anxiety most of my life and depression off and on since I was a teenager (I’m 33 now). My anxiety is so bad that I haven’t been able to call a doctor yet to get help. I don’t drive, I don’t work, and I have a difficult time leaving the house. You and other RUclipsrs are my outlet, my connection to the outside world. I’m sad that you are going through all of this, but it helps me knowing I’m not alone in my struggles. Hearing Cullen talk about getting help is actually giving me encouragement to seek help, and although I haven’t called yet, I am currently trying to work up the courage to do it. I can’t keep living like this anymore and I can’t keep putting my family through all of this. I need outside help, and I am slowly starting to realize that. Please keep being honest with us and share what you can, it helps so much more than you realize.
I have delt with depression alone before...no meds, no psych doctor, no anything...and it. Was. HARD. The hardest thing I have ever done. You guys are so, so, so lucky that you have each other to lean on. We love you. We are behind both of you. Thank you SO much for being vulnerable and opening up about a mental illness that is SO COMMON. I think that one of the most important things you mentioned was that you didn't even KNOW that you were in it and that you didn't think you would ever be normal again. I think one of the hardest things of depression is some people don't even realize that what they are experiencing is depression, or they are afraid to admit it to themselves because of the stigma that comes with any mental illness. Just keep pushing Cullen. I don't know if this will help you at all, but I figure it can't hurt to pass on the information. I needed to put myself FIRST in order to pull myself out of my depression. The only way I found how to do that was with physical activity. I used to hate the gym. I didn't care. I didn't want to take the time to go. But I didn't want to feel that way anymore. I made myself go, over and over. And the depression lifted. Slowly but surely it lifted. Taking time for myself, putting myself as a caregiver (nurse) first, helped. PUT YOURSELF FIRST. You have permission to do that, it's ok. We support you and we will give you guys all the time you need. Keep pushing. Keep at it. You will make it.
Thank you. This vlog has touched my 💜. Ive struggled many many years of depression. I totally felt every word you guys said. My family lost a loved one last week and the past 3days my depression has been trying to take over again my brain running 100mph and ive been searching for some kind of sign, and to sit here and watch your entire 40mins of you talking about the struggles, seems to have awoke something inside and i want to say thank you i will fight. And Cullen fight with everything you have! You have an army of soldiers behind you who completly understand! God bless you. 💙
Thank you for sharing something so personal! 💕 I am also dealing with depression and having panic attack’s, for the last 4 yrs. It’s not easy dealing with it, and everyday is a struggle. Pls continue to be there for each other no matter what the outcome is with your relationship, always be there for each other 💕🙏🏻
Y’all have always been one of the most relatable youtubers there is out there, and that’s what I love about y’all as a family. Today was so raw and I loved every minute of it. I am so glad y’all are working through everything. Hang in there, y’all will get through it!
This is one reason why I love you guys and will always follow and support you. Thank you for being open and honest about your lives and depression. I told Katie on Instagram about me dealing with Postpartum depression and I just wanna say thank you for talking about it.. I wish it wasn’t such a taboo topic.. I needed this video today though. I would have watched yesterday but my 9 week old Rainbow baby boy has an ear infection and has just needed extra love and snuggles from his momma. I’m praying for you guys!! Always!!
It's amazing to see that people can relate and support you. I struggled with depression ALONE for almost four years in high school. I used to cut myself and burn myself and not even feel anything. The numbness from it made me feel some sort of release. Then, I met my fiancè and these past two years have been so amazing. My anxiety is gone, it's ALL gone. There are still times when I get really angry and want to hit a wall or kick something over... But I can now calm myself down and think more positively. A few years ago I got angry and went to cut myself again, and I couldn't do it. That's when I knew I was healing. I love you Cullen and Katie, stay strong! You're an amazing example for your children and for us. Love you forever!
Unless you've been through something as difficult and life consuming as depression, you just don't know. I am so happy that you guys are working together to get past this difficult time and not giving up on each other. I don't know what is harder, going through a depression or having to stand by and watch someone you love go through it and not be able to fix it. Many people see someone with depression as weak, yet to admit that and get the help that you need is incredibly strong. Noone is invincible and you have to suck it up and get help. I did, and it may have been the most difficult thing I've ever done. Good on you Cullen for taking a step in the right direction. I love watching you guys, and love the fact that you guys are real about life. Sending you both much love and many hugs.
I can’t thank you both enough for making this video. Mental Health is such an important topic to discuss, and this video could open the door for others to talk about their Mental health. From the middle of 2016 through August of 2017 I was really struggling with Mental health and didn’t think it was ok to talk about, until about September of 2017 I opened up and got the help I needed. I’m still not 100% but I’m a lot healthier and stronger than I was at this point one year ago. Love you guys! ❤️
I had no intention to watch this full video, but I did, and it was amazing. You guys nailed the feelings of depression right on the head. I personally have never had anyone explain it as well as you guys did. Thank you. ❤️ My pastor just preached a sermon on Sunday night. He said something that has been stuck in my mind that I want to share with you both. He said that instead of praying for behavior modification, we need to pray for God to change our hearts. Because only God can change hearts. I don’t know if that is helpful at all but I wanted to share. God bless!
Thank you for making this video, for me, for them, for you...I have struggled with depression and anxiety in waves for years...it is not a quick fix, it will take time and take a toll, but if you can “just keep going and trying”, even if it’s getting out of bed for 15 minutes and taking a shower, every little step is a positive...know that a step back isn’t the end, it’ll take many steps forward and more steps backward to get back to where you want. I don’t pray and I am not religious, but you are in my thoughts❤️
Thank you! Thank you for sharing your story, not just as a couple but as individuals. Thank you for being so real and relatable. I have only recently come across your videos and have loved all of the ones I’ve watched so far and this video was one that I could really relate to a lot in several different ways. It had a huge impact on me as I’m sure it had and will on many others so once again thank you for making this video
I'm praying for you guys during this time. It takes a lot of strength to face depression. Thank you for sharing with us. God will definitely see you through.
Ps you’re more of a man to admit your feelings and take control than anything!! Amen to you Cullen!!!
You have given so many people hope by posting this video. The best thing any parent can give their children is a happy marriage. I know if Gains and Brooks could tell you, they would thank you for caring enough about each other to keep trying. Love you and hoping for the best for all of you.
Four years ago I found your channel and instantly fell in love and looked up to you guys as the PERFECT couple. Today I fell in love with you guys all over again as the most REAL example of true love. It’s not always pretty, it’s hard, and sometimes it just plain sucks. But you guys are fighting the good fight for each other and for your family. Thank you for allowing us to see this side of you - the world (and RUclips) needs more of this ❤️
I had to pause this at 6:08 to write this comment. I don’t think I have ever seen a man cry. Not my dad, not my brother in law, no boyfriend or friend. To see you cry first brought tears to my own eyes. Secondly, it made me feel a weird sense of relief. I am proud of you for showing your emotions because it is not easy no matter who you are. But being able to show them, to others, that might be feeling similar emotions is a wonderful thing you are doing with the platform you have. I have nothing but endless prayers and love for both of you. I know words might be hard right now but I, as well as many others, have the utmost faith in both of you and I hope you can carry that with you some days. I love y’all.
What a wonderful comment @Mia Fiore.
Cullen looks totally crushed I think you guys need a holiday break away from social media go away and just enjoy yourself as a family we will all be here when you get back don’t let social media destroy your marriage love and huge hugs sent xxxx
Valentine I agree! I haven’t watched RUclips in months and I came back recently and he has lost weight also so you can tell he is stressed and going thru things
Emma Hoffmaster I commented was ago that he has lost weight I feel so bad for them
It hurts my heart to see all of the people in the comments also struggling from depression, but it just shows what a positive impact you guys have by sharing your story.
Mrs Space Cadet thanks for saying this. ❤️
Thank you
Our Heavenly Father, we pray that you wrap your loving arms around Cullen and Katie during this time. Let them stay close to you so that they walk beside you each and everyday. We pray for their precious family and that they all know and feel your love. Heal them dear Lord and let them know that they are precious. Guide them during every moment in their lives so that they will be a light to each and every one of us. Our Father, use Cullen and Katie to always be as one, and allow them to be the positive voice to help others who might be going through the same situation. They are so very special to many dear Lord. Let them know how much they are loved. Cullen and Katie, you and your family will be in our prayers. Let God be your strength.
When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles - Psalms 34:17
Aimee Liner amen
Amen!
❤
Amen!!! A beautiful and perfect prayer. ❤️
Aimee Liner amen
it was a well deserved break ❤️ your marriage & family is more important than anything else! supporting y'all always through thick and thin
I don't understand some of these comments. why the hell watch if u don't agree with their life? I know everyone is in titled to their own opinion but this wasn't the video to be throwing out rude insensitive comments. Katie is absolutely right and should block and delete those who disrespect her family. This is the most real and raw video I've seen yet. That took mad courage. I don't think u should stop u utube what so ever that just shows how uneducated society is about this. yall working and being with each other 24/7 doesn't make a difference. It's a chemical imbalance. I've read these comments the last 3 videos, "stop utube" "get real jobs". why u watching then? I and thousands of others appreciated u both for having the strength to do this. Much love and respect to ur family from mine.
OutdoorLifeFamily talk about backwards mate, seriously get a grip and get out!!!
Debbikins it's true, though. How can she expect her husband to stay interested in her when she let herself go and put on so much weight. She needs to take responsibility.
OutdoorLifeFamily that's what you think... unless you are a doctor with a degree in this case what you think has no waiver on what they do whatsoever
OhOh ItsMagic let's face it, we all have at some point, life happens, but while he is dealing with his issues she is the one taking care of everything and everyone else, we all lose track sometimes, and you cannot sit there and tell me that you are perfect because I know better
EatPlums
This is what I hate about people like you!
The majority of men are always taught to be strong! If they cry, they are considered weak etc!
That mindset can make it so much worse!
Stereotypes on both women and men isn’t okay! Gender stereotypes can cause so much harm and bullying could happen too!
I love how Cullen is expressing his emotions because of how brave it is! It isn’t always easy to talk about what is going on in your life and what is troubling you! Talking in front of a camera would be even more difficult again!
Both Cullen and katie have been through so much, depression is ruthless as well which doesn’t help! It can take hold of anyone regardless of their situation!
Society doesn’t need to have all those rules! Everyone has emotions and everyone should be allowed to express them!
Keeping your emotions bottled for too long isn’t healthy either!
Your emotions aren’t too “feminine or too “oprah-ish” and it’s not embarrassing!
If you can talk to someone you can trust then that can help too!
On a lighter note, loving the color coordination.
A strong marriage requires loving your spouse even in those moments when they aren't being loveable ; it means believing in them even when they struggle to believe in themselves. 💕 Prayers to your family .
If only all bloggers were this honest, the rest of the world would realise that no one has a completely rosy life, and wouldn't beat themselves up comparing themselves with people who on the outside appear to have the perfect life. No one does, all relationships take work, a lot of work! You guys can do this!
Praising God for this work in progress. Thank you for sharing. That sounds so trite for me to say "thank you for sharing". but for real. Thank you.
The Frey Life love this comment Peter & Mary!
The Frey Life love your channel
Wow did you 2 ever nail this. 100% Guys you are very much on the road to recovery now. You will stumble but you are going to make it. I too was completely in your shoes.
I'm healed. It always seems impossible until you have beaten it. YOU WILL BEAT IT.
That Chicken Purse Chick just because they are speaking about it doesnt mean all is well inside...Take chester bennington from linkin park who spoke to everyone about depression however inside he was still a mess.
Hi guys. Depression is dibiltating. I don't care who you are. I lived 30 years in depression. I'm 41. Self-harm for a good 20 years. I'm on medication, a lot of it. You'll get better Cullen. Keep talking with Katie. Don't close up and leave the ones who love you out. They love you and care. Hugs to you both!
If love and touch is Katie's love language, Cullen, it's important you give her what she needs. Just as it's important she gives you what your love language is. :)
Jen Teal Aq
Only about a minute in, but thank you so much for starting things out telling each other you love each other. I'm praying for y'all.
At first I felt bad for you guys and then when you started talking about your feelings and thoughts.. I realized I’m going through the same thing. I definitely needed to see this so thank you 😔
mstens930 same with me
Same here
I could definitely relate!
Me to
His Needs Her Needs is an EXCELLENT book to read together. ♥️
Cullen and Katie you are both incredible people. You are so brave, honest and allow yourselves to be vulnerable, all admirable qualities. Thank you for sharing your experiences with depression, it can only help break the stigma of mental health. I have been in that same dark, isolative place that you described. It is a scary place and self harm did come to my mind. Thanks to the love of my two children I sought intensive help and I’m happy to report the dark place is a distant memory. God Bless and keeping you in my prayers. It was a relief to finally see you guys today!!!!!
Thank you for this. Thank you for being so open and honest and explaining how you’re working through things both individually and together. I don’t look up to you and your family because you’re perfect, I watch and admire you because you’re not and neither am I and sometimes it helps to see how genuinely good, committed people deal with everyday things. Some inspiration and role modeling for the rest of us :)
Thank you for being brave enough to make this video. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, but I admire you both so much for sitting down and talking openly about depression and what you’re going through. You have an army of friends and family and FANS who are rooting you on. ❤️
For the past several years I've asked God for a word for the year. One year it was Balance. I was like ya, I need more balance in my life and I tried to work on that. This year the word he gave me was ARK. Like Noah and the Ark. I got to thinking about that story and realized how we have glamorized it and made it so cute with the animals walking 2 by 2 etc. What you forget is that they were on that boat for a LONG time filled with stinky animals and a whole lot of crap. Rocking and rolling. All they probably wanted was off that dang boat BUT God had a plan and knew in order to be saved they had to stay in the boat. Stay in the boat Cullen and Katie. Run to Jesus. Give him everything you've got. ((((HUGS))) and prayers coming your way!!!
Oh, you guys I relate to this so much. I felt very similar after Irene & never talked about it either really. And it can be so hard on a marriage and so hard when you are trying to vlog your life and you're in such a public space. We have disappeared a few timse because in a lot of ways RUclips can be helpful but also really challenging. I just wish I could crawl right in through the camera and hug you both! We're here for you if you ever want to talk and we care about you so much.
Hi Sudden Kimpact I have been so glad to see youz back, and your carZZZZZ drama OMG You are super hero's , thats when you just look up to the sky and say WHAT IS GOING ON ....wooooooo
there is still SO much stigma around depression and anxiety. SO MUCH. and SO MANY even when people are able to take that brave leap and admit that they're depressed, there's even more stigma about feeling like they should be able to get out of it really quickly once you admit it and start working on it. it can take years to get out of a bad depression. and that's OKAY!!!!!!!!! thank you so much for being brave and for being honest, that is the only way things will start to change!
Don't give up on your marriage! A new partner never solves problems but will just bring new baggage to deal with. Keep it up!
I do hope you realize how many people you may have helped by posting this video.....I know the video was made to let your subscribers know about 'what's going on" (as if it's any of our business!) I don't watch a lot of family you tubers but of the 4 or 5 I do watch you are THE MOST REAL couple I have ever seen.....and I want to thank you for that....people have to know that some of the family vloggers who's lives are shown as always good, always happy, always fun.....are not real life. So my wish is for continued healing for your family b/c we, your subscribers, will be here for whatever you need to do for you!
So proud of you guys for putting the light on this! My husband suffered from deep depression after a losing his job when we were first married. I had no idea how to help and took his sadness personally. Things deteriorated so much we talked about divorce daily. We decided to PRAY & Get therapy together. Prayer and therapy really was able to heal us from the inside out and now I feel like I understand depression so much more and will be better prepared when/if it comes up again. Sending big hugs and prayers to you two!❤️❤️❤️❤️
Yea depression doesn’t know your income level, or how big your house is, and it doesn’t care. It just takes over your life, and changes you.
missychelle33 this is amazing
The young family 3.0 it’s just the truth. ❤️
missychelle33 This is so true.
I love how emotionally supportive Katie is as Cullen speaks! We love you guys!
SpielsWithSam is
Right? I noticed that too!
SpielsWithSam me too. I REALLY wish I had that with my stbx
He's lost weight forsure. :(
Prayers going up for your family.
He'll be ok
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have almost hit call to my doctor about 10 times this last week. I am struggling. Being a mom of 2 has hit me HARD. I snap at my toddler just like you were saying. I wanted to throw in the towel on my marriage countless times in the last 6 months. Its such a scary place to be. Thinking I can’t be a mom I’m not cut out for it. I just want to lay in bed all day, if I could I would. But tomorrow morning I will call. You made me feel like it’s ok to not be ok. ❤️
RAS FAM I could have written this post myself. I will call as well tomorrow! Making this promise to myself now!
Same 😔
Just an opinion here (and I haven't read any others so if there are others that said this same thing, sorry!)...but if you "almost hit call" to your doctor because of your struggle ...I think you SHOULD. There is NO SHAME in saying "Hey, I need help".
I was in the exact same place a year ago. Make the call. You'll be glad you did!
Words to describe you both... Brave, Strong, Faithful, Compassionate, Loving, Amazing, Honest, REAL, Relatable, Humble, Graceful.... seriously could go on and on about the GOOD things about you both. I don’t know the details of the situation and neither does anyone else, nor should anyone, marriage is intimate and some things like Katie said need to stay between the two of you. BUT although I don’t know the details, I can tell that no matter the issues you guys CAN get through this! I pray you both hold tight to your faith and constantly remind yourselves why you love each other! I pray your relationship comes out stronger after this valley.... God can use the ugliest times of our lives and make something beautiful! Thank you all for being to authentic, you two are very special people! You have no idea how many people you are probably helping by making these videos! Thank you, and may God bless you both!
Sometimes self harm and suicidal thoughts aren't what you think.. some people get to the point of not caring when they're in the car to wear their seat belt and don't care if something happens.. and it's terrifying when you're in the grips of that mental monster. Cullen, I'm so happy you're getting the help you need and the help Katie and the kids deserve. Praying for you guys.
Jenna Filbert Agreed! I'm currently getting help for PPD and PPA and looking back it got to a point where I would spend entire car trips trying to figure out if there was a way I could drive into oncoming traffic and my children be ok but me be gone. I would have sworn up and down that I wasn't suicidal but it would start as a thought and I would mindlessly hop on that thought train and over time it turned into almost a subconscious desire that would be forgotten the moment I got out of the vehicle
I understand this alot...with the depression everyone used to ask me why you depressed, there has to be a reason....but most of the time there wasn't a reason everything was right and great but I was depressed
Y'all are great, hope youll heal during this time, and hope the depression will loosen it's grip.
Angel Mae Yes! And it's especially hard when you hear this and you start to beat yourself up because you ask yourself the same thing.
Simply RaeAnn agreed... alot of people end up beating themselves over it when it's something they for the most part cant control without some sort of help whether that be talking to someone or medication. I know it's very hard to open up about depression cuz negativity can make it worse.
Angel Mae i
Angel Mae Ive had this to, it wasnt very bad or something, I kept going with things like school, but on the inside I felt soooo.... sad/depressed, most beacus I didn't feel good with myself, I wasn't happy with how I look and am. Than I found something I like to do, actually 2: I started playing guitar and I started doing more fun things with my friends. I feel better now, I still sometimes feel like that, but than I have something to get over it, I just think about coming home and do things I love, and I realized that other things don't mather.
Mental health is so easy to brush under a rug, but mental health is soooo important. Neither one of you are alone. Praying hard for your family! It gets better. You have God on your side and you’re willing to fight, I would say this is a great day to be alive. 💙
My husband and I have been really struggling with this lately for the past few weeks, and I really needed this. Thank you for showing this vulnerable side of your lives. Sincerely wish nothing but the best for you both and your sweet family.
There is a obvious love for each other. You can get through this, I think a big help would be just give up the camera for a couple months and just work on yourselves. You can’t do this with cameras on all the time. Like you said youtube makes everyone seem perfect, No one is and it really is sad fans think that.
THIS!^^^ I agree 100% Turn off the public window into your lives and take time to heal and knit your marriage and re-strengthen yourselves.
Unfortunately this is their job, if they don't work they get no income!
TinaBallina Maybe it’s time to go look for jobs outside of youtube. There is no way they can heal their relationship with cameras running all the time.
We love you guys. 💓 Cullen crying had me tearing up. Praying for you both. 🙏
Me too.
Me fourth
Kelly Reed I cryed too
Wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade wade
Britt Hart what does wade wade wade mean
I came across this video through suggested videos of other family vloggers that I’ve been watching on and off lately. I used to follow you guys three years ago, when I was with my ex. My depression was so bad that I almost failed out of college, I could barely work at my amazing job, and my relationship was garbage. But your videos, along with Ellie and Jared, gave me an out. In the way that when I was feeling hopeless about life, I would watch your videos and feel okay about where I was. You guys gave me hope for my future. Cullen, please know that your dedication to showing the internet your life is what helped pull me out of my depression years ago. I still love you guys. You have an amazing support in Katie and you will learn how to be yourself with this.
This past Thursday my 17 yr old cousin took her own life. She was a senior in high school, top 10 in her class, and ready to serve God. My Family is beyond heartbroken she had just started therapy and getting help. She did everything in her will to help others and she was so outspoken and strong willed. She did everything she set her mind to. Today we laid her to rest and the amount of love and support shown by our Family, Friends, her Friends, Teacher and community was so over whelming and amazing. But I urge you to seek help if you need it. Someone wants to listen and someone does care. It’s okay to admit you are not okay.
adri cavazos Iam so sorry. It's hard to lose someone when it makes no sense. Stay strong in your faith
I am so very sorry for your loss.....praying that you and your family know comfort and strength at this time.....I lost my best friend in the summer, I know how painful grief can be 😓 Sending much love, many hugs and prayers 🙏🏻💕
adri cavazos i
I’m so sorry. Praying for comfort for you and your family’
So about that Jesus is with you every step of the way!
Oh, my gosh! Thank you for you honesty. I think there are a few other RUclipsrs should make this realization and face the truth. Many women have done it, but never men.
I was crying at your montage at the end. We are so lucky that you have decided to share your lives with us. We have missed you but take all the time you need xxxx
I honestly don't know what to say about this video because we see you guy's all happy and prefect but then you go off camera we have no idea what's going on then to see this video it is sad to see you guys struggling with depression and your relationship so I hope you guys can figure things out and I hope you know that we love and care about you guys.
I have been watching you guys since before Gaines was born and I am so proud to see how far you guys have come!! You’re an amazing family!! You are very brave for being able to open yourself up to everyone about such a personal subject!! What passage were you guys before the video? Love you guys so much and just stay strong!!❤️
First time watcher! Forever subscriber! I too suffered in the past with depression and anxiety. What non-sufferers don’t comprehend is that this is a sickness just like cancer or high blood pressure or diabetes. As a Christian it’s awesome that you have such a huge platform to reach others going through this very thing. In my personal opinion I feel that God may “allow” this journey in your life because of your obedience and willingness to share such a private part of your life. Praying for nothing but good for you both here on out.
"One second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time"
Stephanie Hastings best advice there is ❤
Been watching y'all since before you were pregnant with Gaines, and I had just had my baby girl a few months before you had Gaines. I also had a baby boy about a month before you had Brooks, so it feels like I'm seeing an alternate reality of my life, haha (also, I'm originally from Vestavia - now living in FL).
I relate to this video so much. I had severe PPD the entire first year of my son's life, and it put a huge strain on my and my husband's relationship. I'm finally starting to come out of that darkness, and my husband and I are working on a lot of the same things you guys are.
Rooting for y'all. Take time off if you need it. We will always wait!
hello. i’m not a regular watcher but i’ve seen a few videos of yours and stumbled upon this. you all probably won’t read this but i just wanted to share my story. i’ve battled depression for the past two years. the most difficult part is the feeling of i have nothing to be upset about or maybe i’m just sad. it’s fluctuated some months weeks even days good others horrible days where i didn’t get out of bed and had horrifying thoughts. right now i’m good but i’m so scared that this won’t last. things are hard for me right now and i’m worried i might crumble soon. seeing this i realized that getting help isn’t a sign of weakness. it means your strong. i will be telling my friend tonight and trying to get up the courage to get help. so thank you for sharing. the impact of it is probably more than your realize. thank you
Y'all need to work on spending more time as a couple. Kids especially toddlers take a huge toll on a marriage. My husband and I have had 2 stillborns and we have 5 living kids. I've also had a major surgery. Marriages go through ups and downs and we have been where y'all are now. Katie forgiveness is the hardest to do but it is totally worth it. Hugs to both of you. Forget the haters. Y'all have a lot of fans praying for you ;)
Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain so you are right, you can have everything and still be depressed. Prayers for you all 💖
Bailee clemmer a chemical imbalance is only one form of depression.
I’m loving this.. somewhere in the middle still.. My Gabriel suffered clinical depression, and explained it just like you are. It’s not the circumstance. He was wonderful, and adamant in telling me it wasn’t me.. I wasn’t to blame. It was a struggle for both of us, but we just kept at it. He got meds and counsel that, after many miss-mixes, that finally helped. He was my heart I just couldn’t ever give up on, just as he never gave up on my package.
Thank you for coming to us, and sharing, talking to us as friends. We’ll be here to listen, and travel this journey with you. ❤️❤️🙏
Praying so hard for you guys! We know first hand what you are both dealing with. It's so hard, and a lot of people don't understand. Thank you for talking openly about this though because a lot of people don't.
Cullen I am sorry you are going through this now. The book of Psalms helped me in my darkest hour. David had a lot of bad things going on around him yet his prayers to God we’re beautiful and comforting to all of us that “go through the valley of the shadow of death”. I am praying for you.
I hope you feel better Cullen. My heart breaks seeing how much weight you have lost. You are clearly in deep pain and I pray that the new medicine helps. Don’t feel pressured to vlog right now. Maybe y’all need to step back and take a break from RUclips for a while . Heal your family. That’s the priority.
The scariest thing for me was wondering will I ever be me again?!?!? Cullen I am me again and I am happy, now I have good days and bad but not because of depression, just real life. Praying for y'all. Just remember this is your testimony this is what you can use to help someone else. Reach out to Jesus he is there.
Racheal Lewis i needed to read your comment. Gave me hope. Please keep me in your prayers...
Yes!! I changed my diet and it was night and day. I’m finally me again after a year of rage and drowning in every aspect of my life. It will happen.
Have you thought about having hormone levels checked? I went through something similar to this and I had a severe deficiency in vitamin D as well as other things that could mimic depression. Keep up the forward movement you will make it through.
Nikita Embree I was going to comment the same thing. Getting hormones and vitamin/mineral levels checked, when dealing with depression, should be the first step.
I agree, having dealt with thyroid disease, they symptoms can also cause and/or mimic depression
Taking Vitamin D supplements totally surprised me, made me feel so much better physically and mentally. Good idea to get a good physical exam and blood work if you haven't already.
Maybe he actually has depression?
Nikita Embree yes vitamin d is something to get checked if you're feeling depressed! My aunt was put on some vitamins and she is feeling 10x better!
You guys are amazing. Thank you for being so raw and real. There is such a sigma on depression that no one wants to talk about, and y'all getting this out there is going to help so many people! Praying for you both!
Keep seeking Christ in your marriage. Love y’all 😘
You should do research on food to eat to fight depression, food intake is a big part of depression. Also doing outdoor activities & getting fit helps sooo much.
I feel like y’all are the parents I never had. Thank you for simply speaking about this. You’re more appreciated than you’ll ever know. 💜
Anxiety is a very lonely feeling because you don’t feel safe en secure in your own mind and body and you can n’t run away of it. I know so too.
Believe me, time will come that you see the light again and feel the colors and peace as well again.
Be patience and be kind to yourself.
You two are the best! 💞😚
Is it me or does Cullen look like he’s lost weight?
Wendy Reyes I thought the same thing
Depression does make you lose weight a lot of the time. You don’t want to eat. You have no motivation. It’s just terrible!
Yes for sure, too much stress and depression will do that to you.
I have noticed it for months that he has.
Yes / I noticed that right away / some meds will do that to you as well.
Wow! I am SO proud of you both for speaking about this! You both have helped me to not be ashamed of suffering from life’s curve balls. I’ve had a hard almost 3 years. Loss of....my Dad, my Mom, my dog, my father-in-law, my daughter’s miscarriage. Happiness in finding my husband’s birth family(he was adopted). All these things gave me stress, anxiety, and sadness. I do relate and realize it’s ok to talk about it. Thank you Cullen and Katie❤️!
Listen to Yours by: Russell Dickerson
tie a knot and hang on, give it all to Jesus spend more time in the Bible, you will notice a huge sense of inner peace
"Choose joy, choose this, take a walk.." just that entire statement, Katie, is everything I wish my family & friends heard. I wish they knew that and understood that. Of course I can wake up and choose to feel happy. But the chemical imbalance.... the missing parts of my mind that cause the depression, can overpower that choice to "feel happy." -- I'm new to your channel but I struggle with MDD and I really appreciate you being open about it. It's tough. It's not fun. It's HARD. It's frustrating. Battling something that isn't always physically seen is difficult. But then there are people like you who choose to share this and be open and let others (like myself) know that they're not alone. Thank you Cullen and Katie. My heart goes out to you both, and my prayers are with you.
My husband and I went through counseling last year. My depression & anxiety got really bad and it was affecting our relationship. We originally went together for myself and then it turned into working together and it improved our relationship so much. We are so much closer now. And while it was difficult for myself and for him, I loved being so open and close with him. It was a long time coming but I do not regret it one bit and I am not ashamed of it. There is nothing more important that making sure your loved one knows that you love them, even if it means counseling or something...ya know? You guys are so awesome for sharing all of this.
Depression is a medical condition and has nothing to do with what you have or don't have the whole family has been through so much pain
Did they match they chlothes with the room on purpose or..?? (Sorry just the first thing I noticed) ps stay strong you both!!
Just A Person I noticed that too!
I have been dealing with horrible postpartum depression and it has taken a HUGE toll on my relationship with my fiancé. Seeing people be so open and so real about these hard times but continue to drive towards happiness helps in ways you that you have no idea. Thank you so much Katie and Cullen. God bless and I hope you find peace and happiness. ❤️
Thank you for being so open about what you’ve been dealing with. Several close people to me suffer with depression, but your description of it helps me understand what their going through better. I appreciate that. This will help countless others who are going or will go through similar experiences. You will be made stronger than ever for fighting for what is right than giving up. God bless you!
I see the hurt, but I also see how fiercely you are fighting for you family. Sending so much love 💗
I'm new to your channel. I've see/heard of you through other family vloggers. It's refreshing to see "real" talk instead of choosing to hide what's going on in your life, like some other channels. Your viewers are not entitled to know your personal business, but just saying something is happening/has happened is enough. Show casing the "everything is wonderful all the time" is destroying the minds of the younger generation watching vlogs. Using your platform to teach them about something very important in lift is to be commended. I appreciate your honesty and am a new subbie because of it. I retired from the mental health field and it amazes me how many people don't know that the mind is very complex in how we process. We all are capable if losing it in a snap; depends upon the trigger. I'm so glad that you both are seeking treatment and pray that God blesses you, your family and friends. You need your entire support team during this time.
I’m so proud of how strong you are being able to open up the way you did in this video! I’ve battled depression and anxiety since the age of 14, it took me 5 and a half years to find the right medication, so many trials of different drugs, talking to psychiatrists, and multiple hospital stays, it was one of the hardest things of my life. But once I found that right medication I’ve never felt better. I’ve been on it for a year and a half now and I’m finally living my life! No matter how low the lows are, one day the highs will be so high and you’ll feel back on top of the world again. Keep pushing through, you have such great support and I know you can do it. Lots of love ❤️
Sometimes these things come out of nowhere. I went through a really hard time last year where I went from being so happy and fine.. to being struggling to keep myself on the earth. It’s so good to know that you’re not alone. Especially people I look up to.. it’s inspiring that you were able to share your story. Thank you so much, it might not seem like it, but this video is motivation for me ❤️
I totally respect y’all for this! In 2016 me and my husband and father to my son went through this we split up for a whole year and it was the hardest year of our lives we tried moving on after trying to make it work for so long and it didn’t work. We realised the beginning of 2017 we couldn’t live without each other and we should just make it work and put our differences aside. Now we are happier than ever and putting god first in our marriage. This made my heart so happy. Thank y’all for posting this part of your lives as well! We love you guys!
Y'all aren't alone. I'm proud of y'all for sharing. This past year has been rough for my husband and I as new parents and PPD and PPA. Communication between my husband and I has brought us so far. I hate that y'all are in a difficult season, but it's comforting to know we aren't the only ones to have been there and working through depression.
You guys are so real ❤️ and I appreciate your honesty. My husband and I both suffered from post pardon depression and we fought all the time. We are working through it, and it is one of the hardest things! I appreciate you opening up the door for this conversation and helping others! I truly believe this is going to help someone else.
Just barely started the video but I wanted to say I have always admired y’alls relationship. The support and love you have for each other is genuine. Thank you for bringing light to depression
I admire y'all so much for making this video. My 2 boys are almost exactly the same ages as Gaines and Brooks. My husband and I have been married for 4.5 years. Our oldest was born at 34 weeks and it was one of the scariest days of my life. Before that, we had a loss at 20 weeks and I never thought I could ever feel that low again. After my youngest was born, I got so overwhelmed with being a mom and a wife that I just shut down. Alot of counseling, along with medication, helped so much. I went back to school in August 2016 and I'm getting ready to graduate as a registered nurse in May. The last 2 years have been so hard on our marriage. I have day where I tell my husband "I can't do this by myself. You need to come home because me by myself with 2 toddlers is gasoline on a fire right now." Keep praying. And stick together. Y'all are an inspiration to me in my marriage and my parenting. No one is perfect. You don't owe it to us or anyone else yo explain every detail of what's going on. You have to continue to do what's best for the 4 of you. That's what matters. It's ok to be done, if you really need to be done. I am the same way that I believe in fighting for it. Y'all are awesome. Prayers for y'all everyday.
You have no idea how much I admire and respect you both for posting this. It helps in so many ways. It’s so hard to define what depression is and how it affects you. It lies beneath everything you do - quietly and unsuspectingly. And because it’s always there, you don’t realize how much it takes away from your life. To be so supportive and aware of each other is so beautiful. By sharing this you really help so many people! Me included. Thank you so much! I send you love and support. I hope you find your heart and happiness again. Don’t stop trying......you are loved 💗
You guys are going the right direction. I have struggled with depression, anxiety and self harm and the first step to get help is so hard. The fact that you are both supporting each other is huge. Good luck with everything and stay strong. ❤️
I UNDERSTAND. ....I have felt this way after the death of my husband mainly from dealing with his illness....he suffered from Alzheimer's Disease for 13 years and I was his caregiver...Many times in life we are very vulnerable and we need to take time to deal with the pain and take ALL the help we can get from every source. ...counseling, medication, prayer.....and friendships and love....that is where I come in ....I love you guys, I will pray for you and I am grateful for the progress you have made....TALK, TALK, TALK......LOVE TO YOU !!
My mother took her own life a few years ago and I have battled postpartum depression. Mental health is my sore point, my fight, and my passion. Prayers for you guys and thank you for shedding a light on mental health and I pray your light gets brighter.
I have PPD too and it's so hard. It's so so hard. Thank you for this video, and for saying out loud the things that people who are struggling are so scared to say.
Love you guys. Depression knows no situation, age, gender, race...can happen to anyone. Sending lots of love.
It seems to work for Ellie and Jared on two days behind it will work for you to. Please know when I was fighting depression I started to watch Ellie and Jared that how I met you guys I couldn't stop watching you guys because you guys bright light to my life. If it wasn't for Ellie and Jared and you guys I Probaly wouldn't got through it lot easier. I want to thank your family for being who you are. I be praying for you guys and love you guys keep your chin up
This is so timely and thank you so much for sharing. My husband has been going through major depression for over 3 years, including several hospital visits. I had a Liver-Kidney transplant 3-1/2 years ago. Between these two life-changing events our marriage has suffered greatly. We are just starting to try and see if there is anything left of it. We have been married almost 27 years. So, thank you for being open and honest about mental health and marriage struggles.
Thank you so much for sharing all of this. I know it must be difficult to lay all of your business out there for everyone to know, but you have no idea how much you can help someone else by sharing your own experiences. I have dealt with anxiety most of my life and depression off and on since I was a teenager (I’m 33 now). My anxiety is so bad that I haven’t been able to call a doctor yet to get help. I don’t drive, I don’t work, and I have a difficult time leaving the house. You and other RUclipsrs are my outlet, my connection to the outside world. I’m sad that you are going through all of this, but it helps me knowing I’m not alone in my struggles. Hearing Cullen talk about getting help is actually giving me encouragement to seek help, and although I haven’t called yet, I am currently trying to work up the courage to do it. I can’t keep living like this anymore and I can’t keep putting my family through all of this. I need outside help, and I am slowly starting to realize that. Please keep being honest with us and share what you can, it helps so much more than you realize.
I have delt with depression alone before...no meds, no psych doctor, no anything...and it. Was. HARD. The hardest thing I have ever done. You guys are so, so, so lucky that you have each other to lean on. We love you. We are behind both of you. Thank you SO much for being vulnerable and opening up about a mental illness that is SO COMMON. I think that one of the most important things you mentioned was that you didn't even KNOW that you were in it and that you didn't think you would ever be normal again. I think one of the hardest things of depression is some people don't even realize that what they are experiencing is depression, or they are afraid to admit it to themselves because of the stigma that comes with any mental illness. Just keep pushing Cullen. I don't know if this will help you at all, but I figure it can't hurt to pass on the information. I needed to put myself FIRST in order to pull myself out of my depression. The only way I found how to do that was with physical activity. I used to hate the gym. I didn't care. I didn't want to take the time to go. But I didn't want to feel that way anymore. I made myself go, over and over. And the depression lifted. Slowly but surely it lifted. Taking time for myself, putting myself as a caregiver (nurse) first, helped. PUT YOURSELF FIRST. You have permission to do that, it's ok. We support you and we will give you guys all the time you need. Keep pushing. Keep at it. You will make it.
Thank you. This vlog has touched my 💜. Ive struggled many many years of depression. I totally felt every word you guys said. My family lost a loved one last week and the past 3days my depression has been trying to take over again my brain running 100mph and ive been searching for some kind of sign, and to sit here and watch your entire 40mins of you talking about the struggles, seems to have awoke something inside and i want to say thank you i will fight. And Cullen fight with everything you have! You have an army of soldiers behind you who completly understand! God bless you. 💙
Thank you for sharing something so personal! 💕 I am also dealing with depression and having panic attack’s, for the last 4 yrs. It’s not easy dealing with it, and everyday is a struggle. Pls continue to be there for each other no matter what the outcome is with your relationship, always be there for each other 💕🙏🏻
Y’all have always been one of the most relatable youtubers there is out there, and that’s what I love about y’all as a family. Today was so raw and I loved every minute of it. I am so glad y’all are working through everything. Hang in there, y’all will get through it!
This is one reason why I love you guys and will always follow and support you. Thank you for being open and honest about your lives and depression. I told Katie on Instagram about me dealing with Postpartum depression and I just wanna say thank you for talking about it.. I wish it wasn’t such a taboo topic.. I needed this video today though. I would have watched yesterday but my 9 week old Rainbow baby boy has an ear infection and has just needed extra love and snuggles from his momma. I’m praying for you guys!! Always!!
It's amazing to see that people can relate and support you. I struggled with depression ALONE for almost four years in high school. I used to cut myself and burn myself and not even feel anything. The numbness from it made me feel some sort of release. Then, I met my fiancè and these past two years have been so amazing. My anxiety is gone, it's ALL gone. There are still times when I get really angry and want to hit a wall or kick something over... But I can now calm myself down and think more positively. A few years ago I got angry and went to cut myself again, and I couldn't do it. That's when I knew I was healing.
I love you Cullen and Katie, stay strong! You're an amazing example for your children and for us. Love you forever!
Unless you've been through something as difficult and life consuming as depression, you just don't know. I am so happy that you guys are working together to get past this difficult time and not giving up on each other. I don't know what is harder, going through a depression or having to stand by and watch someone you love go through it and not be able to fix it. Many people see someone with depression as weak, yet to admit that and get the help that you need is incredibly strong. Noone is invincible and you have to suck it up and get help. I did, and it may have been the most difficult thing I've ever done. Good on you Cullen for taking a step in the right direction. I love watching you guys, and love the fact that you guys are real about life. Sending you both much love and many hugs.
I can’t thank you both enough for making this video. Mental Health is such an important topic to discuss, and this video could open the door for others to talk about their Mental health. From the middle of 2016 through August of 2017 I was really struggling with Mental health and didn’t think it was ok to talk about, until about September of 2017 I opened up and got the help I needed. I’m still not 100% but I’m a lot healthier and stronger than I was at this point one year ago. Love you guys! ❤️
I had no intention to watch this full video, but I did, and it was amazing. You guys nailed the feelings of depression right on the head. I personally have never had anyone explain it as well as you guys did. Thank you. ❤️ My pastor just preached a sermon on Sunday night. He said something that has been stuck in my mind that I want to share with you both. He said that instead of praying for behavior modification, we need to pray for God to change our hearts. Because only God can change hearts. I don’t know if that is helpful at all but I wanted to share. God bless!
Thank you for making this video, for me, for them, for you...I have struggled with depression and anxiety in waves for years...it is not a quick fix, it will take time and take a toll, but if you can “just keep going and trying”, even if it’s getting out of bed for 15 minutes and taking a shower, every little step is a positive...know that a step back isn’t the end, it’ll take many steps forward and more steps backward to get back to where you want. I don’t pray and I am not religious, but you are in my thoughts❤️
Thank you! Thank you for sharing your story, not just as a couple but as individuals. Thank you for being so real and relatable. I have only recently come across your videos and have loved all of the ones I’ve watched so far and this video was one that I could really relate to a lot in several different ways. It had a huge impact on me as I’m sure it had and will on many others so once again thank you for making this video
I'm praying for you guys during this time. It takes a lot of strength to face depression. Thank you for sharing with us. God will definitely see you through.