When I went to doctors in the 90 s with symptoms of cptsd after loosing both parents I was told it would pass and doctor said when you feel like that go and window shop at the malls 😢never had anyone to talk to and I used to drink to numb My feeling s. I felt so stupid thinking a doctor could help and did nt I’d poured my heart out and I was only in my 20s . Back track from that point and I was given antidepressant meds after years of suffering one thing after another. Just wish I’d had more help from such a young age . Love your compassion Anna ❤️ x
Thank You @crappychildhoodfairy for sharing this message and helping us understand what is going on with us. I am a 45 year old woman living in NYC. Therapy since my 20's - never heard of CPTSD until I stumbled upon your videos a few weeks ago. The knowledge you share has been revelatory. The approaches you share have actually helped me in a real way. I also have felt that talking in therapy has not been helpful in a meaningful way. Thank You for what you are doing!!! 🙏🏼🌺
Sleep. Coffee ☕️ and cake. Gentle exercise. Spa, jacuzzi, sauna. Beautiful, luxurious environments. A clean home. Naps. Good food. Authentic people. My daughter and her girlfriends. Working towards a career and financial goal. This helped. And watching RUclips.
At 56, I feel like humanity has failed me and while no one has to love, care for or about me, I'm learning that I don't have to love, care for or about anyone but me. I'm not emotionally healthy enough to build deep connections with other people, so I'm surrounding myself with my animals.
Same. Animals fill my heart. Crap-fit friends make me feel awful for trying to count on them the way they've been able to count on me. I'd rather be without friends than have crappy ones.
Yes, same. Also 56 and love my animals. I have 2 dogs, a cat, and 2 horses. They are my lifeline. Without them I feel I would never have had any love at all. Animals are so special.
This last week, I have discovered some things, and I think they’re crucial parts of my healing. As an individual who is totally blind, on the autism spectrum and has CPTSD, I feel like I’ve discovered that me touching everything around me in sight is me expressing feelings of pure curiosity. I wasn’t allowed to touch everything around me, I was taught that I had to overcome this behavior because that’s not what sighted people do, and it’s “socially awkward.” But in all reality, it’s me expressing pure curiosity, because I navigate the world with my hands and my ears and with movement. I also discovered that maybe I don’t have to overcome crying or feeling mad, just as long as I just be rational and not lose control. Being sensitive isn’t always a bad thing. The people who try to restrict me from touching everything and the other things they restrict me from, they for one have a difference in opinion of me navigating the world. But I like touching everything. I have overcome so much in my healing. So whatever it takes, I will overcome people’s restrictions that led me to restricting and limiting myself. I will regain freedom, but I will not let freedom get to my head! I will keep utilizing the wonderful coping skills that I’ve gotten over the years.
And you might notice it’s making the energy around awkward and choose to limit it but maybe not and it really makes you more comfortable and feeling you’re experiencing more of life All the best!!
I am responding as an Autistic and CPTSD but i have sight with low vision and i definitely know it isnt the same but you being on the spectrum and being blind would make sense to want and need to touch your surroundings. Your caregivers should have given you a safe, comfortable space to explore, touch and feel textures, learn and enjoy and grow. How else do they expect you to understand your environment without that large part. That is a huge neglect of a person's humanity, in my opinion and i am so very sorry you went through that. I very much hope you can be in an environment where you can be yourself and learn and grow and explore in a way that is good and right for you so you can enjoy and be happy.
@@yazajag luckily, I’m with my biological mom now. My mom lets me touch everything. But she’s more realistic about it. My mom even encourages me to show my emotions. My music therapist also does the same. My husband, who is also totally blind, and on the autism spectrum, he encourages it too.
I hate it when I say "yes I have CPTSD due to my childhood & my ex-husband" & some people have audacity to say "i know your mom she isn't that bad" omg... I just want to scream 😢 no one has gone through what each of us have throughout our lives, each of us process our trauma differently & it makes me sometimes think "yeah it's ok, I'm ok" when in reality I'm truly not. As past generations have done they like to sweep it under the rug, we don't talk about it, it never happened. I will not be silenced anymore! I will speak my truth from here on out, not only for myself but for my children.
Especially when your mother was a covert malignant narcissist, and she chose you as her scapegoat! My (so-called) mother had a public image, and was okay to my siblings, but to me she was sheer evil. I felt, several years ago, that I could finally speak some truth to one sister, but I was wrong. Now I have no contact with any family of origin, and that's okay. Mom had trained them all to have scorn toward me from the start. As Anna says "We see love where there is no love." God will sort it all out, in the end. And I thank Him for helping me discover Anna!
I call that idea that we can make other people stop triggering us "Living in the Land of Should." We can't grow if we're stuck worrying about what we think other people should or shouldn't do. We can only control ourselves.
I share your rage about this. I can't tell you the money I have wasted on therapy over the last 3.5 decades of my life. I have gone into a therapist's office with a narrative of parentification--a few sessions on the family story then "let's talk about your depression." I asked my last therapist, you said I need to process emotions. What does that mean? How do I do that? No answer for that question. No tools, no process, no theoretical answer. It's appalling. I have found therapists who say they do trauma therapy and they do not. The maybe have taken a brief course, and hang it onto whatever they are most familiar with. It really is malpractice with the general public as victims.
My nursing career for 23 years has been utterly horrible for my cptsd. I am constantly having trauma responses flying out all over the place. I’m 51 and just found out about all this last year after going NC with a 12 yr narcissist, the last of many. I spent 16 years in ICU which caused a whole realm of ptsd when constantly dealing with people dying in horrible ways. The last 7 years have been in the operating room with surgeons who have all kinds of characteristics on 55:07 the narcissistic spectrum. It caused a ton of weight gain, adrenal glands crashing, autoimmune disease and high inflammatory markers and the doctors couldn’t find a reason for it. I feel like the only way I can completely heal is to change careers. Working as a nurse during COVID was on a whole other level. Getting ready to go back to to school.
I can absolutely relate to this. I’m leaving the ER after seven years and now all I feel is relief. If you ever need to vent please reach out, it can be so isolating especially when trying to leave a narcissistic relationship.
Thank you for recognizing how beneficial anger can be. These spaces are full of people shaming people for not forgiving and for being angry. But my parents were too busy abusing me instead of teaching me life skills. My choices up until recently have been to be a doormat for abuse or to be angry and keep people at a distance. Too many people want to blame you for your survival skills being maladaptive now with no appreciation for them keeping you alive. They just want everyone playing nice all the time. Abuse survivors have a right to their anger.
"trying doesn't always lead to success of course, but success favors people who try" . I had always tried so hard and mostly failed (I thought). Thank you for helping me heal.
Thank you for sharing! You are doing a great job. Being ready to keep going despite failures is a huge step forward already! Keep up the great work, you deserve to heal, and we're all rooting for you! Nika@TeamFairy
A friend of mine and me were both in therapy for depression, and we both talked about our crappy childhood. The different approaches were so visible, my friend had a new graduate who knew c-ptsd and helped her out, mine was old school and insisted I didn't have any trauma, because you can only have it after a bad event. We only talked and didn't get any tools to improve. After one year the difference in our healing was visible, and I was so frustrated to have the wrong doctor. I couldn't go to hers because different states.
Go Anna Go! I really appreciate your directly taking on the situation of complex PTSD and particularly with the Healthcare system. They just want to medicate something they don't understand and have you believe only they can do it for you. It's like the church in that sense. You're not allowed to commune with God unless you go through the church. They don't want you to know that you got the power to do that directly and that includes healing ourselves. Thanks for the direct Frank talk. Much appreciated
For these long videos, it would be extremely helpful to put time markers for the different sections/topics. I don't have the attention span to listen to the whole video. "Bullet points" would be great.
It takes time for content creators to learn all the tips and tricks of editing videos and RUclips doesn’t always make it easy, but perhaps she will be able to make ‘chapters’ for sections in the future.
😮Transcript: if you click on that times are given throughout the conversation. I opened the Transcrpit to get the titles of the books she mentioned. I also double the playback speed. Our brains can still absorb the info. You could use the transcript to skim or speed read. I hope this helps.
18:28 - Omg! This is a breakthrough for me! I have long wondered why I attracted a “certain type” but you’re right, the question is “Who am I attracted to? Who do I allow in my life? Who do I date? Who do I tolerate? Who do I sleep with?” Thank you! Btw, when you said narcissists were falling from the sky and landing next to you, that just had me lol! You’re right… clearly these people aren’t “landing” in our orbit. We are also seeking them out! Ugh 😣 But yay! 😀 because I get it now!
You just randomly showed up in my feed...And from the beginning of your video,I was triggered and uncomfortable with every fresh angle and new coping/healing thought processes...yet I paused you,so I could take notes and not miss your words...It was like a locked,stuck,heavy door that I had decided to just avoid and isolate...wrapped myself up in fear and resentment..."strong to hang on"was my motto.But I'm 54.And also dealing with schitzo-affective,bi/polar,with a twist or two of anxiety disorders,narcasstic abuse/trama,etc etc.Ive already waisted so very much time and energy being sick and unhappy and so much dysregulation...I want to be at least lighter,I want to let go of what I can.I want to find some peace,so that my last breath isn't ALL regret and unhappiness,and being so very difficult eeverytime to my loved ones...You have made me want to work on myself again,and I was through!THANKYOU!
Anna, this video is wonderful! You hit the spot for me again and again : THANK-YOU!! I think your videos would be so helpful if shown to people in jails and prisons, who, I am convinced, are more grown -up traumatized children than simply being bad people. I would like to encourage other subscribers to promote this idea in their counties, as I plan to do in mine.
I completely agree with you. My brother is serving a life sentence and if you knew how we grew up, you’d understand why. Two heroin addicted parents who taught my bothers how to steal at age 10, a dad who physically beat my mom, who also overdosed at age 40 and we found him on the bathroom floor, grew up around gangs, it goes on and on. My brother is actually one of the gentlest people you’ll ever meet (I’m more assertive and a Type A than he is) but when you grow up like that, and clearly have PTSD from a very young age, what can we, society, expect from them???
" people in jails and prisons, who, I am convinced, are more grown -up traumatized children than simply being bad" is perfectly right!!! NO being has ever been born BAD!! They don't need to be punished, but to get all the help that's possible to HEAL!!!!!!!
Been going insane since 2020, isolated from everyone and I tried everything to get better. One video from you and Lisa Romano made me start to change. It’s CRAZY CRAZY! how a 15-20 minute video from you did more for my life than hours of worthless diagnoses.
You don’t even imagine how thankful I am for discovering this wisdom lady, one of the few people who introduces to me very powerful concepts in orden to heal. I know everything (or almost) about narcissism, about people around me, but at the end of the day the most important thing is to know ourselves and heal. So helpful, THANKS SWEET FAIRY ❤️
Creativity helped me. Getting absorbed in art helped me get back in touch with my inner child and love that aspect of me that wasn’t afraid to be creative. It could be any creative activity at all so long as you feel you’re being totally authentic and that you love what you do
Thank you for sharing this with us! Great that you've found your way to help yourself with getting regulated. Good luck on your healing journey! Nika@TeamFairy
Thank you for the mention of CPTSD not only occurring in children. Yes I have situations from childhood but I was generally alright although naive till starting a 18 year toxic relationship. I am out and have found a counsellor which talks more about the tactics to handle dysregulation than trying to bring up the triggers.
Talking therapy can re-traumatize you. It works for venting or validation but for most people it can make it worse. No matter what therapy you get into it there's an amount of talķing about your history and it's needed to a certain point. I find what is hardest for me to overcome is learned helplessness which is another sign of trauma. Right now what works for me is diaphragmatic breathing, meditation and mindfulness but still stuck in paralysis; freeze and fawn response. Our systems keep producing more trauma than is possible to heal; poverty, wars, permanent crisis...narcissism and cluster B disorders being praised and encouraged...and voted in democratic elections. It's sad. I'm glad I'm childless; I won't leave anyone behind when my life is over. It's the best thing I have not done in my whole life. God bless us all.
Love your passion on this! I was born addicted to heroin, went through childhood SA, a DV & substance abuse family, Father going to prison for murder, neglect, poverty, both parents dying in my late teens and my only sibling going missing - all by the time I was 21... I'm in my 40's and have seen several therapists... Not ONE ever hinted toward CPTSD being a possibility. Makes me angry too! Your content is so deeply appreciated. Thank you!
I have a neighbor who had a Traumatic childhood. She's now 56, & Still goes to the same Stupid shrink she's gone to, since she was 18! I say stupid, bcz he knows nothing about menopause. Her body is changing, & she takes 8 pills a day. Hello-O !!! After all those years, of the same meds., your body builds up a tolerance, for one. Then you go through menopause... The way I see it is, That guy is clueless and or, doesn't really care about her health. He just keeps pushin' the pills & getting the $$$ from big pharma. 🙄🙄🙄. But I encourage her & I mean what I say. I Always tell her, "You're Not stupid." &, "You're Not Crazy," She won't sleep in her bed. She sleeps in a chair. Anyone wld. think it's bcz of sexual abuse as a child. But it cld also be, bcz her mom beat her butt with a belt. Idk, but I don't persue it. I don't want to trigger her trauma. She'll remember when she remembers. But I & another neighbor Encourage her. 💗
THANK YOU ❤ we NEED people like you to speak up the way you do (WORDS and ACTIONS). I see the disconnect between the care received by patients and given by our system. I also think the issues are partially due to a lack of clear communication on what a person can do to learn, grow and eventually overcome; not just rely on someone to tell them what they need to get by. What I like about you and the work you do is that you give people the information and tools to learn to help themselves!! I recently listened to a video discussing generational trauma and its impact on all people. Although I don’t disagree with it being a thing, I can definitely see why many people get offended by that term especially if they are trying to overcome their individual trauma that stems from the childhood THEY experienced. Not everyone feels validation hearing they are a victim of someone else’s poor decisions. Even if they do I don’t think people want/ actually intend to “rinse and repeat” their trauma or constantly blame the past. They just don’t know how to help themselves overcome how they feel and many times did not get the right life’s set up to be encouraged to do so. Uuugh I could go on but anyways I work in healthcare myself and would love to learn more about your perspective on improving the assessment process for healthcare empowerment. I think we need new ideas on how to get this ball rolling. It may be beneficial to make it more “popular to fund” in a way thats not just a great pitch idea to make more money for healthcare business 😬. I’m all for bringing back healthy support. We need positive Interdependent communities that value individuals who understand how to think for themselves again. Hearing you speak on some of the issues in our healthcare system that frustrates you (it also frustrates many healthcare clinicians/personnel btw😅) has motivated me to keep advocating for myself and for my pts within my field of work ❤️🩹 THANK YOU!
I've been watching your videos on and off all day. One of the responders mentioned biofeedback therapy for C-PTSD. I've never heard of this, so i did some research online and found a therapist in a nearby town (I live in a rural area). I sent her an email explaining my situation and asked her if biofeedback would work for C-PTSD as well and the usual PTSD. I hope I hear back from her tomorrow.
I found EDMR and Anna and I'm getting there. My therapist diagnosed CPTSD first appointment after ACE score was 8. I'm grateful at 50yo to find some answers re CPTSD .
Avoid EMDR. Its not what you think and not what therapists are trained to believe. It’s fake healing. It dissociates you from the trauma so you can no longer access it but is still buried deep in your psyche.
Thank you so much for this. You’ve described my own journey accurately. I’m with a truly amazing partner who has been deeply hurt by my wounds and trauma response mechanisms but has chosen to stand with me. We have many challenges - cultural differences, a huge age difference and even language differences. These differences have been major triggers for me. What’s natural and normal for him is fraught with risk and misunderstanding from my traumatised perspective. He called me out on my toxic behaviour and told me that he was thinking about leaving me because I kept wounding him and pushing him away. I have an anxious avoidant attachment style. He said that if I’m not willing to work on myself, he is limited in how he can support me. I had a huge crisis when I recognised the truth of what I was doing to this beautiful, healthy human. My whole focus and willpower is now firmly in my healing. Initially I was distracted by his needs and I felt I had to be perfect in order to be worthy of his love. This created additional pressure and it literally led to a kind of breakdown, and from this, a breakthrough. It’s tough but it’s possible to change an attachment style and manage and heal CPTSD symptoms. I come from generational familial abuse on both sides. Yesterday I did a light hypnosis with my therapist where I did some ancestral healing and I truly understood how victims of abuse become perpetrators. This gave me real compassion and forgiveness all the way to my great grandparents. I saw that I have the self awareness and resources that no previous generations had, that I can heal this and release the “curse”. I saw how my protective barriers resulted in making me toxic to anyone who tries to get close to me. This was an agonising realisation but it shook me loose of the chains that have bound me all of my life. Being in a healthy relationship has been a major turning point in my healing journey after decades of negative patterns and isolation and mental and emotional agony. It takes courage, determination and the desire to love oneself, be very conscious of the body and the symptoms and have strategies in place to address these consistently. For me it was finding real love and then hurting this lovely man because of my own pain that finally jerked me out of my prison. Losing something valuable was my trigger to take my healing seriously. I don’t advocate using a healthy love relationship as a mechanism for healing, but this is what happened to me. I was so stuck that I guess I needed an extrinsic trigger. Either I continue with my self destructive patterns or I step up and embrace the gift of love and take ownership of my healing. I chose love.
Yes, finding an approach that works for you and the big thing that I've learned is TIME. I'm not saying that taking a proactive approach to healing but what I'm saying or meaning is that as a side note sort of, don't get discouraged if the work you put in and the process isn't feeling like it's making a difference ... it takes the magic of Time.
You said a lot of things that needed to be said about the system. The letter at the end crushed me. I had a very similar experience last year and I'm still healing. 😔
I was literally just thinking about the small things that have helped me, like repeating the thing I am going to get something from another room. I found your content the very night before I was to give a big talk about my backstory and I was shocked I had never been diagnosed. Just knowing what was happening during dis reg. It helped me identify the causes, like a change of plans, or leaving the house.
This is good, powerful information AND it’s challenging to digest because it’s one person non-stop talking with no pauses, no dialogue. I’ve needed to pause it and come back because it feels like a firehose of information.
I can relate to anger at the system.... Even though I am disabled due to a Traumatic Brain Injury -( TBI ),as well as physical injuries from an auto accident and can only work about 10 to 15 hours a week at most,I had to fight for 15 years through 4 appeals and 3 attorneys to FINALLY recieve Social Security Disability Income -( SSDI )!!
Hi, the answer to your question of why psychologist, psychiatric and related DON'T WANT TO DIAGNOSE C-PTSD is because of greed. There is no money coming in if they treat the illness right at its core. No money there. Not for a long while anyway. Insurances are also culprit because they want long term treatments preferably with meds.
Thank you so much, dear fairy! What an important speech,,,,,,! Thank you from the heart for all your work, your straightforwardness and spirit. Your videos have been so irreplacably supportive and healing for me!!!!!!!!! Looking forward to reading our book! ❤❤❤
Thanks for giving us our self agency back Anna! Speaking as someone who had a therapist like that THANK YOU! Some therapists don't want you to know the real problem or the truth 💯! They want money.
I don’t like any memories, happy or otherwise. I am not someone who believes be happy it happened. I cannot tolerate any feelings at this point in my life.
Awesome video, so so helpful! Re: “under supervision of a doctor” Hahaha I bought an “anti-stress” coloring book recently that contained a full paragraph about the need to seek professional help for relief of distress instead of relying on a book.
Thank you so much for your insightful videos. I’m one who definitely has C-PTSD, and now later also PTSD. I love to isolate! But I have to say my friends who say I’m with a Narcissist help me to isolate. They won’t ever come to see me because they don’t like the Narc. I have to always go to them. I always have to call them. If I call and they’re busy, they say “I’ll call you back” but never do. So yeah, I self isolate but I also have lots of help. I’m in between jobs right now and I’m trying to find a new job in a different state so I can end the current long relationship. This is where I’m at now - in limbo. 😢
Does this guy in the letter know how to block!! Yes, it's hard...she is manipulating. I've even changed my number and never called again. But YES, It is hard...but a MUST BE. It comes under the gift of operating in Self-control. Tight boundaries are necessary for MY SANITY. Reconnecting ISN'T necessary for my future or success. Even thinking about it, I feel anxiety rise. Sometimes, I can't listen to THESE videos!! One thing ive learned to do. Block SOONER! It's those I let go too long and developed a bond with that are difficult. And it's those who find ways around my blocking that drive me DAFFY!! UGH!!
The Jekyll and Hyde people are honestly so much worse than those who are just assholes (dysregulated) all the time. It's like you feast on scraps, and sometimes scraps that are over the top/love bombing style, only to be shattered over and over and over. There must be strong chemical addiction behind entanglements like these. Especially for someone who tends towards empathy and forgiveness (both neutral traits, both have pros and cons), the *false hope to devastation cycle* is life sucking. No contact, as far as is possible, surely is the ONLY way to heal from this specific situation. ❤
I read a lot of novels, collect them, I am interested in perfumes, testing them. I love to walk, play with my daughter, I love music, cinema. I cut the relation with my parents and sister, now I will have to announce it to my children and that’s very stressful. 😢😢😢 My hobbies feels like avoidance. That’s my next step.
Anna, have you ever heard of Dr. Alok Kanojia from the RUclips channel Healthy Gamer ? He is a psychiatrist who also talks about the importance of changing our life and doesn't medicalize all our symptoms. He practices yoga and shares insights he has learned from his studies. He also speaks to the power of meditation and taking action in your life. He just released his own course on CPTSD as well as an educational video. He regularly meets with other youtubers and if you are interested I would love to see you two crossover. I think you two would have a lot to talk about because he also is taking the route of helping people outside of a broken medical system.
If they diagnose the condition off the bat, they can't make money off their 'victims'. It's more profitable for them to treat each symptom individually.
And keep you on “pharma”…especially psychiatrist drugs…which cause so many side effects. And…then they just wanna add more or up your dose…when you feel they are not working.
What about schizophrenia? I was victim of narcissistic abuse as a teenager and i am diagnosed for schizophrenia. I feel everyone is a narcissist and i get into bad relationships. I had neglect as a child but that was never discussed. I don't know how to talk to people because i haven't learnt it as a kid, i don't know how to connect with people... All my negative symptoms are also symptoms of Cptsd. Is there a correlation?
Hello Anna and the team. I've just discovered your free Daily Practice Course having watched a few of your videos and I really appreciate your wonderful generosity of spirit in sharing what you've learnt. However, I'm grappling with understanding the writing exercise!! For example..'I am resentful of my neighbour because I have fear that....' that's when I get stuck! My feeling about her is jealousy about how much money she has and the fact that she drives a fancy car with a personalised number plate etc etc (I genuinely don't want a fancy car, I'm very happy with the one I have)...So I'm judging her I think...But. what I don't get about the writing exercise is ...what am I fearful of? I'd really appreciate someone explaining that bit to me! I'm now feeling fearful that everyone on here will think I'm totally stupid!!
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Thank you for getting back to me. I really appreciate that. I'm actually in the process of taking the course. I haven't got to the FAQ bit so I'll have a look. Thanks again!
@@CrappyChildhoodFairyHello again. I've listened to the FAQ about my question but I still don't understand I'm afraid. This is where I get stuck: For example. 'I have resentment at my son's Dad because I have fear that he isn't giving me any money for our son'. What am I missing? This doesn't make sense to me. I'm not FEARFUL that he isn't giving me any money...I'm irritated/annoyed/cross. I'm truly not trying to be obtuse here...I just don't understand it.
I've been in therapy on and off for 10 years, had a therapist, nurse practitioner, psychiatrist, multiple primary care doctors in different cities all over the country due to moving around and been on lots of medication over the years and I don't think you could've said it better they really just have been limping everything in with generalized anxiety disorder and chronic depressive episodes like my medical reports day depressive episodes relapse reoccurring but I'm like had that been my entire life? What does that mean ? I've never heard of cptsd before your channel and I feel it's not only my main problem but also some of the people around me as well and since discovering this my healing journey has made more leaps and bounds in a few months than it has over the last decade of so called professional help
Their youngster dons take over the same harassment do they keep you in an unsafe status day and night hoping you fall apart while they enjoy my possibilities in their life. One of the misunderstood illnesses are all trauma created stress: gland problems cause metabolism going haywire. Make you fat and heavy in two days 25 kilos! Etc. It’s sick how these agendas were all along!
I feel very uncomfortable around a particular person who is very loud and tells negative stories in a very dramatic way. If I ask her if she can tone it down a bit, SHE gets triggered and says she has always been shut up and she’s not going to be shut up anymore. I tell her I’m interested in what she is saying and I’m not trying to shut her up. I like her but it seems that we can’t be together.😢
I think something that would be really good for us all if you would be open to it. You doing a zoom call for free once or twice a week for us all to have that safe space with people who are like us. (Just a suggestion)
Anna and other CCF coaches do free Zoom calls already! They're free for those who took Anna's free course, The Daily Practice. If you're interested, here's a link to the course: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice Nika@TeamFairy
In Australia, the problem arises from the fact that psychiatrists adhere strongly to the DSM-V and the biological model of psychological/psychiatric health. All problems are a result of neurotransmitter receptors or pathways within the brain. You are faulty if you have these problems - and need to be 'controlled' by the use of medications that act on these receptors - despite the lack of robust evidence of efficacy. SSRI's, SRNI's, antipsychotics such as Aripiprazole, and so forth. Patients are abused and denigrated. Women are mostly dismissed as malingerers, manipulative Borderline personalities or BiPolar - and given Lithium - sometimes forcibly under State order under the Mental Health Act. Women leave psychiatric units heavily sedated and unable to think. There is enough evidence in Australia for a government review that nearly 60 % of women leave psych units far more traumatised than when they were admitted, because they are seen as non-compliant, 'naughty' and need discipline, denigrated and demeaned. It is NOT routine for any Australian psychiatrist to take a history of either childhood abuse, or the frequent follow on: domestic abuse. In effect , women are punished and abused for having been abused. Their life is re-written for them.
Thanks a lot ,I really appreciate what you are doing. If we are talking about a situation when person has: nervous dysregulation, direaleasition and depersonalisation. May be empath And have cptsd What to do in that situation? My tryings to just live isn’t working because of experience with ddd and cptsd,so it doesn’t make for me sense My nervous system was so sensitive and having a lot of stress, It’s even hard just to do something
Thank you Anna. I usually listen on Spotify. I wanted to find the books I knew I'd heard you mention. I am so grateful to be living in this time. If I hadn't seen your videos accidentally I wouldn't know about CPTSD.
Ery word out of your mouth is truth, down to not being able to use knife and fork. ( I still don't at 68. Comb back of hair. Your a genius. Could you be L handed?
Trauma-driven thinking can be discouraging. But never forget: Healing is possible! If you haven't already, you may want to try Anna's free course ‘The Daily Practice’. It is the technique that led to Anna’s own healing, and she uses it to this day. Here’s a link if you’re interested: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice Nika@TeamFairy
The Daily Practice is a free course that provides the technique that led to Anna’s own healing, and she uses it to this day. Here’s a link if you’re interested: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice Nika@TeamFairy
![Stromae, Pomme - “Ma Meilleure Ennemie” (from Arcane Season 2) [Official Visualizer]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1F3OGIFnW1k/mqdefault.jpg)
I've been in psychotherapyfor 20+ years and only your videos are helping me. My professional therapy is unhelpful.
Exactly , I was just saying how therapy is only as good as the therapist.
Glad you are here!
Nika@TeamFairy
When I went to doctors in the 90 s with symptoms of cptsd after loosing both parents I was told it would pass and doctor said when you feel like that go and window shop at the malls 😢never had anyone to talk to and I used to drink to numb My feeling s.
I felt so stupid thinking a doctor could help and did nt I’d poured my heart out and I was only in my 20s . Back track from that point and I was given antidepressant meds after years of suffering one thing after another. Just wish I’d had more help from such a young age . Love your compassion Anna ❤️ x
Amazing same here.
Thank You @crappychildhoodfairy for sharing this message and helping us understand what is going on with us. I am a 45 year old woman living in NYC. Therapy since my 20's - never heard of CPTSD until I stumbled upon your videos a few weeks ago. The knowledge you share has been revelatory. The approaches you share have actually helped me in a real way. I also have felt that talking in therapy has not been helpful in a meaningful way. Thank You for what you are doing!!! 🙏🏼🌺
Sleep. Coffee ☕️ and cake. Gentle exercise. Spa, jacuzzi, sauna. Beautiful, luxurious environments. A clean home. Naps. Good food. Authentic people. My daughter and her girlfriends. Working towards a career and financial goal. This helped. And watching RUclips.
Sooo agree with you, and actually DOING these things you list.
I love that!
At 56, I feel like humanity has failed me and while no one has to love, care for or about me, I'm learning that I don't have to love, care for or about anyone but me. I'm not emotionally healthy enough to build deep connections with other people, so I'm surrounding myself with my animals.
feel the same
Same. Animals fill my heart. Crap-fit friends make me feel awful for trying to count on them the way they've been able to count on me. I'd rather be without friends than have crappy ones.
Yes, same. Also 56 and love my animals. I have 2 dogs, a cat, and 2 horses. They are my lifeline. Without them I feel I would never have had any love at all. Animals are so special.
at 50 i found someone...after i stopped looking and just loved my animals.
@@summer8618 🙏💖
Anna being angry at the system and fighting for all our healing is the best thing on the internet. Thank you Anna, you are amazing ❤
This last week, I have discovered some things, and I think they’re crucial parts of my healing. As an individual who is totally blind, on the autism spectrum and has CPTSD, I feel like I’ve discovered that me touching everything around me in sight is me expressing feelings of pure curiosity. I wasn’t allowed to touch everything around me, I was taught that I had to overcome this behavior because that’s not what sighted people do, and it’s “socially awkward.” But in all reality, it’s me expressing pure curiosity, because I navigate the world with my hands and my ears and with movement. I also discovered that maybe I don’t have to overcome crying or feeling mad, just as long as I just be rational and not lose control. Being sensitive isn’t always a bad thing. The people who try to restrict me from touching everything and the other things they restrict me from, they for one have a difference in opinion of me navigating the world. But I like touching everything. I have overcome so much in my healing. So whatever it takes, I will overcome people’s restrictions that led me to restricting and limiting myself. I will regain freedom, but I will not let freedom get to my head! I will keep utilizing the wonderful coping skills that I’ve gotten over the years.
And you might notice it’s making the energy around awkward and choose to limit it but maybe not and it really makes you more comfortable and feeling you’re experiencing more of life
All the best!!
@@Philanthropyuae I’m getting sick and tired of masking my blind isms and my sensitivity just because society looks down upon it.
I am responding as an Autistic and CPTSD but i have sight with low vision and i definitely know it isnt the same but you being on the spectrum and being blind would make sense to want and need to touch your surroundings. Your caregivers should have given you a safe, comfortable space to explore, touch and feel textures, learn and enjoy and grow. How else do they expect you to understand your environment without that large part. That is a huge neglect of a person's humanity, in my opinion and i am so very sorry you went through that. I very much hope you can be in an environment where you can be yourself and learn and grow and explore in a way that is good and right for you so you can enjoy and be happy.
@@yazajag luckily, I’m with my biological mom now. My mom lets me touch everything. But she’s more realistic about it. My mom even encourages me to show my emotions. My music therapist also does the same. My husband, who is also totally blind, and on the autism spectrum, he encourages it too.
You see by what you feel so I'd be wanting to explore and touch my surroundings too. You do you and don't apologize for it.
I’m 60 years old. I’ve been in therapy since forever for my childhood trauma. This is the first time I’ve heard of CPSTD.
I hate it when I say "yes I have CPTSD due to my childhood & my ex-husband" & some people have audacity to say "i know your mom she isn't that bad" omg... I just want to scream 😢 no one has gone through what each of us have throughout our lives, each of us process our trauma differently & it makes me sometimes think "yeah it's ok, I'm ok" when in reality I'm truly not. As past generations have done they like to sweep it under the rug, we don't talk about it, it never happened. I will not be silenced anymore! I will speak my truth from here on out, not only for myself but for my children.
Especially when your mother was a covert malignant narcissist, and she chose you as her scapegoat! My (so-called) mother had a public image, and was okay to my siblings, but to me she was sheer evil. I felt, several years ago, that I could finally speak some truth to one sister, but I was wrong. Now I have no contact with any family of origin, and that's okay. Mom had trained them all to have scorn toward me from the start. As Anna says "We see love where there is no love." God will sort it all out, in the end. And I thank Him for helping me discover Anna!
@@GlitzNGlitterCafe The thing is: your mom is not a bad human, but she was not a good mother!
I call that idea that we can make other people stop triggering us "Living in the Land of Should."
We can't grow if we're stuck worrying about what we think other people should or shouldn't do. We can only control ourselves.
I share your rage about this. I can't tell you the money I have wasted on therapy over the last 3.5 decades of my life. I have gone into a therapist's office with a narrative of parentification--a few sessions on the family story then "let's talk about your depression." I asked my last therapist, you said I need to process emotions. What does that mean? How do I do that? No answer for that question. No tools, no process, no theoretical answer. It's appalling. I have found therapists who say they do trauma therapy and they do not. The maybe have taken a brief course, and hang it onto whatever they are most familiar with. It really is malpractice with the general public as victims.
My nursing career for 23 years has been utterly horrible for my cptsd. I am constantly having trauma responses flying out all over the place. I’m 51 and just found out about all this last year after going NC with a 12 yr narcissist, the last of many. I spent 16 years in ICU which caused a whole realm of ptsd when constantly dealing with people dying in horrible ways. The last 7 years have been in the operating room with surgeons who have all kinds of characteristics on 55:07 the narcissistic spectrum. It caused a ton of weight gain, adrenal glands crashing, autoimmune disease and high inflammatory markers and the doctors couldn’t find a reason for it. I feel like the only way I can completely heal is to change careers. Working as a nurse during COVID was on a whole other level. Getting ready to go back to to school.
I can absolutely relate to this. I’m leaving the ER after seven years and now all I feel is relief. If you ever need to vent please reach out, it can be so isolating especially when trying to leave a narcissistic relationship.
Thank you for recognizing how beneficial anger can be. These spaces are full of people shaming people for not forgiving and for being angry. But my parents were too busy abusing me instead of teaching me life skills. My choices up until recently have been to be a doormat for abuse or to be angry and keep people at a distance.
Too many people want to blame you for your survival skills being maladaptive now with no appreciation for them keeping you alive. They just want everyone playing nice all the time. Abuse survivors have a right to their anger.
"trying doesn't always lead to success of course, but success favors people who try" . I had always tried so hard and mostly failed (I thought). Thank you for helping me heal.
I'll never give up and just knowing about CPTSD makes it a little easier. Reminds me of Annie Oakley's motto.
Thank you for sharing! You are doing a great job. Being ready to keep going despite failures is a huge step forward already! Keep up the great work, you deserve to heal, and we're all rooting for you!
Nika@TeamFairy
A friend of mine and me were both in therapy for depression, and we both talked about our crappy childhood. The different approaches were so visible, my friend had a new graduate who knew c-ptsd and helped her out, mine was old school and insisted I didn't have any trauma, because you can only have it after a bad event. We only talked and didn't get any tools to improve. After one year the difference in our healing was visible, and I was so frustrated to have the wrong doctor. I couldn't go to hers because different states.
Go Anna Go! I really appreciate your directly taking on the situation of complex PTSD and particularly with the Healthcare system. They just want to medicate something they don't understand and have you believe only they can do it for you. It's like the church in that sense. You're not allowed to commune with God unless you go through the church. They don't want you to know that you got the power to do that directly and that includes healing ourselves. Thanks for the direct Frank talk. Much appreciated
For these long videos, it would be extremely helpful to put time markers for the different sections/topics. I don't have the attention span to listen to the whole video. "Bullet points" would be great.
It takes time for content creators to learn all the tips and tricks of editing videos and RUclips doesn’t always make it easy, but perhaps she will be able to make ‘chapters’ for sections in the future.
😮Transcript: if you click on that times are given throughout the conversation. I opened the Transcrpit to get the titles of the books she mentioned.
I also double the playback speed. Our brains can still absorb the info.
You could use the transcript to skim or speed read.
I hope this helps.
18:28 - Omg! This is a breakthrough for me! I have long wondered why I attracted a “certain type” but you’re right, the question is “Who am I attracted to? Who do I allow in my life? Who do I date? Who do I tolerate? Who do I sleep with?” Thank you!
Btw, when you said narcissists were falling from the sky and landing next to you, that just had me lol! You’re right… clearly these people aren’t “landing” in our orbit. We are also seeking them out! Ugh 😣 But yay! 😀 because I get it now!
Glad to hear the video was helpful for you! Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
I’m definitely stepping far away from toxic people, especially narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths.
You just randomly showed up in my feed...And from the beginning of your video,I was triggered and uncomfortable with every fresh angle and new coping/healing thought processes...yet I paused you,so I could take notes and not miss your words...It was like a locked,stuck,heavy door that I had decided to just avoid and isolate...wrapped myself up in fear and resentment..."strong to hang on"was my motto.But I'm 54.And also dealing with schitzo-affective,bi/polar,with a twist or two of anxiety disorders,narcasstic abuse/trama,etc etc.Ive already waisted so very much time and energy being sick and unhappy and so much dysregulation...I want to be at least lighter,I want to let go of what I can.I want to find some peace,so that my last breath isn't ALL regret and unhappiness,and being so very difficult eeverytime to my loved ones...You have made me want to work on myself again,and I was through!THANKYOU!
What happy news!
Anna, this video is wonderful! You hit the spot for me again and again :
THANK-YOU!! I think your videos would be so helpful if shown to people in jails and prisons, who, I am convinced, are more grown -up traumatized children than simply being bad people. I would like to encourage other subscribers to promote this idea in their counties, as I plan to do in mine.
I completely agree with you. My brother is serving a life sentence and if you knew how we grew up, you’d understand why. Two heroin addicted parents who taught my bothers how to steal at age 10, a dad who physically beat my mom, who also overdosed at age 40 and we found him on the bathroom floor, grew up around gangs, it goes on and on. My brother is actually one of the gentlest people you’ll ever meet (I’m more assertive and a Type A than he is) but when you grow up like that, and clearly have PTSD from a very young age, what can we, society, expect from them???
" people in jails and prisons, who, I am convinced, are more grown -up traumatized children than simply being bad" is perfectly right!!!
NO being has ever been born BAD!! They don't need to be punished, but to get all the help that's possible to HEAL!!!!!!!
Amen! Thank you!
Been going insane since 2020, isolated from everyone and I tried everything to get better. One video from you and Lisa Romano made me start to change. It’s CRAZY CRAZY! how a 15-20 minute video from you did more for my life than hours of worthless diagnoses.
Glad Anna's content was helpful for you! Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
You don’t even imagine how thankful I am for discovering this wisdom lady, one of the few people who introduces to me very powerful concepts in orden to heal. I know everything (or almost) about narcissism, about people around me, but at the end of the day the most important thing is to know ourselves and heal. So helpful, THANKS SWEET FAIRY ❤️
Thank you! You are seeing what's important.
Creativity helped me. Getting absorbed in art helped me get back in touch with my inner child and love that aspect of me that wasn’t afraid to be creative. It could be any creative activity at all so long as you feel you’re being totally authentic and that you love what you do
Thank you for sharing this with us! Great that you've found your way to help yourself with getting regulated. Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
On another note, I love your work here, it's truly helping me learn how to heal 💖
Thank you! 🙏
Thank you for the mention of CPTSD not only occurring in children. Yes I have situations from childhood but I was generally alright although naive till starting a 18 year toxic relationship. I am out and have found a counsellor which talks more about the tactics to handle dysregulation than trying to bring up the triggers.
Talking therapy can re-traumatize you. It works for venting or validation but for most people it can make it worse.
No matter what therapy you get into it there's an amount of talķing about your history and it's needed to a certain point.
I find what is hardest for me to overcome is learned helplessness which is another sign of trauma.
Right now what works for me is diaphragmatic breathing, meditation and mindfulness but still stuck in paralysis; freeze and fawn response.
Our systems keep producing more trauma than is possible to heal; poverty, wars, permanent crisis...narcissism and cluster B disorders being praised and encouraged...and voted in democratic elections.
It's sad. I'm glad I'm childless; I won't leave anyone behind when my life is over. It's the best thing I have not done in my whole life.
God bless us all.
Same here, some say women not having children are 'selfish', I say not having them is the most selfless thing I've ever (not) done!
Love your passion on this!
I was born addicted to heroin, went through childhood SA, a DV & substance abuse family, Father going to prison for murder, neglect, poverty, both parents dying in my late teens and my only sibling going missing - all by the time I was 21... I'm in my 40's and have seen several therapists... Not ONE ever hinted toward CPTSD being a possibility. Makes me angry too!
Your content is so deeply appreciated. Thank you!
I have a neighbor who had a Traumatic childhood. She's now 56, & Still goes to the same Stupid shrink she's gone to, since she was 18! I say stupid, bcz he knows nothing about menopause. Her body is changing, & she takes 8 pills a day. Hello-O !!! After all those years, of the same meds., your body builds up a tolerance, for one. Then you go through menopause... The way I see it is, That guy is clueless and or, doesn't really care about her health. He just keeps pushin' the pills & getting the $$$ from big pharma. 🙄🙄🙄. But I encourage her & I mean what I say. I Always tell her, "You're Not stupid." &, "You're Not Crazy,"
She won't sleep in her bed. She sleeps in a chair. Anyone wld. think it's bcz of sexual abuse as a child. But it cld also be, bcz her mom beat her butt with a belt. Idk, but I don't persue it. I don't want to trigger her trauma.
She'll remember when she remembers. But I & another neighbor Encourage her. 💗
THANK YOU ❤ we NEED people like you to speak up the way you do (WORDS and ACTIONS). I see the disconnect between the care received by patients and given by our system. I also think the issues are partially due to a lack of clear communication on what a person can do to learn, grow and eventually overcome; not just rely on someone to tell them what they need to get by. What I like about you and the work you do is that you give people the information and tools to learn to help themselves!! I recently listened to a video discussing generational trauma and its impact on all people. Although I don’t disagree with it being a thing, I can definitely see why many people get offended by that term especially if they are trying to overcome their individual trauma that stems from the childhood THEY experienced. Not everyone feels validation hearing they are a victim of someone else’s poor decisions. Even if they do I don’t think people want/ actually intend to “rinse and repeat” their trauma or constantly blame the past. They just don’t know how to help themselves overcome how they feel and many times did not get the right life’s set up to be encouraged to do so. Uuugh I could go on but anyways I work in healthcare myself and would love to learn more about your perspective on improving the assessment process for healthcare empowerment. I think we need new ideas on how to get this ball rolling. It may be beneficial to make it more “popular to fund” in a way thats not just a great pitch idea to make more money for healthcare business 😬. I’m all for bringing back healthy support. We need positive Interdependent communities that value individuals who understand how to think for themselves again. Hearing you speak on some of the issues in our healthcare system that frustrates you (it also frustrates many healthcare clinicians/personnel btw😅) has motivated me to keep advocating for myself and for my pts within my field of work ❤️🩹 THANK YOU!
Thank you Anna for this message and for help so many who often feel stuck! You have done a great job!
My model car building hobby helps me fill the void of no relationship....
How does one heal a pre-memory trauma such as that experienced by an infant who is left to cry in the crib?
I've been watching your videos on and off all day. One of the responders mentioned biofeedback therapy for C-PTSD. I've never heard of this, so i did some research online and found a therapist in a nearby town (I live in a rural area). I sent her an email explaining my situation and asked her if biofeedback would work for C-PTSD as well and the usual PTSD. I hope I hear back from her tomorrow.
My symptoms are mostly due to abuse I experienced as an adult.
I found EDMR and Anna and I'm getting there. My therapist diagnosed CPTSD first appointment after ACE score was 8. I'm grateful at 50yo to find some answers re CPTSD .
Avoid EMDR. Its not what you think and not what therapists are trained to believe. It’s fake healing. It dissociates you from the trauma so you can no longer access it but is still buried deep in your psyche.
Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
Thank you so much for this. You’ve described my own journey accurately. I’m with a truly amazing partner who has been deeply hurt by my wounds and trauma response mechanisms but has chosen to stand with me.
We have many challenges - cultural differences, a huge age difference and even language differences.
These differences have been major triggers for me. What’s natural and normal for him is fraught with risk and misunderstanding from my traumatised perspective.
He called me out on my toxic behaviour and told me that he was thinking about leaving me because I kept wounding him and pushing him away. I have an anxious avoidant attachment style. He said that if I’m not willing to work on myself, he is limited in how he can support me.
I had a huge crisis when I recognised the truth of what I was doing to this beautiful, healthy human.
My whole focus and willpower is now firmly in my healing. Initially I was distracted by his needs and I felt I had to be perfect in order to be worthy of his love. This created additional pressure and it literally led to a kind of breakdown, and from this, a breakthrough.
It’s tough but it’s possible to change an attachment style and manage and heal CPTSD symptoms.
I come from generational familial abuse on both sides.
Yesterday I did a light hypnosis with my therapist where I did some ancestral healing and I truly understood how victims of abuse become perpetrators. This gave me real compassion and forgiveness all the way to my great grandparents.
I saw that I have the self awareness and resources that no previous generations had, that I can heal this and release the “curse”.
I saw how my protective barriers resulted in making me toxic to anyone who tries to get close to me. This was an agonising realisation but it shook me loose of the chains that have bound me all of my life.
Being in a healthy relationship has been a major turning point in my healing journey after decades of negative patterns and isolation and mental and emotional agony.
It takes courage, determination and the desire to love oneself, be very conscious of the body and the symptoms and have strategies in place to address these consistently.
For me it was finding real love and then hurting this lovely man because of my own pain that finally jerked me out of my prison. Losing something valuable was my trigger to take my healing seriously.
I don’t advocate using a healthy love relationship as a mechanism for healing, but this is what happened to me. I was so stuck that I guess I needed an extrinsic trigger. Either I continue with my self destructive patterns or I step up and embrace the gift of love and take ownership of my healing. I chose love.
Thank you for sharing your insight with us! You are doing a great work, and we're all rooting for you!
Nika@TeamFairy
💙 You are courageous!
@@gardeniabee thank you! I self-isolated to a huge degree. It was really heavy for me to trust and let someone in and lay down my weapons xx
Yes, finding an approach that works for you and the big thing that I've learned is TIME. I'm not saying that taking a proactive approach to healing but what I'm saying or meaning is that as a side note sort of, don't get discouraged if the work you put in and the process isn't feeling like it's making a difference ... it takes the magic of Time.
I disagree. CPTSD is very hard to treat. One can lose their whole life if they're not proactive.
@ooulalah4333 what are you disagreeing with? Lol. I didn't say to not be proactive. That is absolutely necessary, but also it takes time.
You said a lot of things that needed to be said about the system. The letter at the end crushed me. I had a very similar experience last year and I'm still healing. 😔
I think alcoholism and substance abuse may keep people from overcoming. Ruining relationships.
Absolutely...it's a huge barrier to healing, have to remind myself about that all the time!
Getting sober was my gateway therapy
@@susanlee8023 good for you :-) that's no easy feat!
I was literally just thinking about the small things that have helped me, like repeating the thing I am going to get something from another room. I found your content the very night before I was to give a big talk about my backstory and I was shocked I had never been diagnosed. Just knowing what was happening during dis reg. It helped me identify the causes, like a change of plans, or leaving the house.
Glad you are here!
Nika@TeamFairy
This is good, powerful information AND it’s challenging to digest because it’s one person non-stop talking with no pauses, no dialogue. I’ve needed to pause it and come back because it feels like a firehose of information.
I can relate to anger at the system.... Even though I am disabled due to a Traumatic Brain Injury -( TBI ),as well as physical injuries from an auto accident and can only work about 10 to 15 hours a week at most,I had to fight for 15 years through 4 appeals and 3 attorneys to FINALLY recieve Social Security Disability Income -( SSDI )!!
Thank you for this incredible channel!
Thank you too!
Hi, the answer to your question of why psychologist, psychiatric and related DON'T WANT TO DIAGNOSE C-PTSD is because of greed. There is no money coming in if they treat the illness right at its core. No money there. Not for a long while anyway. Insurances are also culprit because they want long term treatments preferably with meds.
Thank you so much, dear fairy! What an important speech,,,,,,! Thank you from the heart for all your work, your straightforwardness and spirit. Your videos have been so irreplacably supportive and healing for me!!!!!!!!! Looking forward to reading our book!
❤❤❤
So glad you are here!
Nika@TeamFairy
This woman is RIGHT. Period. Studying clinical mental health and I see the gaps, especially how to reach marginalized populations.
It's a lack of required training I believe. I am fortunate to have a fabulous therapist who understands CPTSD.
For me,sometimes letting people in is easier said than done..
Thanks for giving us our self agency back Anna! Speaking as someone who had a therapist like that THANK YOU! Some therapists don't want you to know the real problem or the truth 💯! They want money.
You are so welcome!
Nika@TeamFairy
I don’t like any memories, happy or otherwise. I am not someone who believes be happy it happened. I cannot tolerate any feelings at this point in my life.
💔💙
Awesome video, so so helpful! Re: “under supervision of a doctor” Hahaha I bought an “anti-stress” coloring book recently that contained a full paragraph about the need to seek professional help for relief of distress instead of relying on a book.
Thank you so much for your insightful videos. I’m one who definitely has C-PTSD, and now later also PTSD. I love to isolate! But I have to say my friends who say I’m with a Narcissist help me to isolate. They won’t ever come to see me because they don’t like the Narc. I have to always go to them. I always have to call them. If I call and they’re busy, they say “I’ll call you back” but never do. So yeah, I self isolate but I also have lots of help. I’m in between jobs right now and I’m trying to find a new job in a different state so I can end the current long relationship. This is where I’m at now - in limbo. 😢
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. Good luck on your new path!
Nika@TeamFairy
Does this guy in the letter know how to block!! Yes, it's hard...she is manipulating. I've even changed my number and never called again. But YES, It is hard...but a MUST BE. It comes under the gift of operating in Self-control. Tight boundaries are necessary for MY SANITY. Reconnecting ISN'T necessary for my future or success. Even thinking about it, I feel anxiety rise. Sometimes, I can't listen to THESE videos!!
One thing ive learned to do. Block SOONER! It's those I let go too long and developed a bond with that are difficult. And it's those who find ways around my blocking that drive me DAFFY!! UGH!!
The Jekyll and Hyde people are honestly so much worse than those who are just assholes (dysregulated) all the time.
It's like you feast on scraps, and sometimes scraps that are over the top/love bombing style, only to be shattered over and over and over.
There must be strong chemical addiction behind entanglements like these. Especially for someone who tends towards empathy and forgiveness (both neutral traits, both have pros and cons), the *false hope to devastation cycle* is life sucking.
No contact, as far as is possible, surely is the ONLY way to heal from this specific situation.
❤
I read a lot of novels, collect them, I am interested in perfumes, testing them. I love to walk, play with my daughter, I love music, cinema. I cut the relation with my parents and sister, now I will have to announce it to my children and that’s very stressful. 😢😢😢 My hobbies feels like avoidance. That’s my next step.
Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
27:20 woah mama your on fire 🔥 ❤️ love the power n energy n of course the message
Anna, have you ever heard of Dr. Alok Kanojia from the RUclips channel Healthy Gamer ? He is a psychiatrist who also talks about the importance of changing our life and doesn't medicalize all our symptoms. He practices yoga and shares insights he has learned from his studies. He also speaks to the power of meditation and taking action in your life. He just released his own course on CPTSD as well as an educational video. He regularly meets with other youtubers and if you are interested I would love to see you two crossover. I think you two would have a lot to talk about because he also is taking the route of helping people outside of a broken medical system.
I just discovered him last week! Both of them are amazing and agree they should do a collab!
Good discussion. Thanks
Thanks for watching!
Nika@TeamFairy
If they diagnose the condition off the bat, they can't make money off their 'victims'. It's more profitable for them to treat each symptom individually.
And keep you on “pharma”…especially psychiatrist drugs…which cause so many side effects. And…then they just wanna add more or up your dose…when you feel they are not working.
Thank you for your encouragement Anna. Can Parkinson's be added to the list of chronic diseases that involve CPTSD?
thank you for sharing with me where you found your empowerment - it showed me the way to find mine
We're all rooting for you! -Calista@TeamFairy
Good topic
22:38 to 58:35 - impactful, thank you, CCF!
The Pete Walker book that she talk about about PTSD is free on Audible. The body keep the score is there too but not for free.
What about schizophrenia? I was victim of narcissistic abuse as a teenager and i am diagnosed for schizophrenia. I feel everyone is a narcissist and i get into bad relationships. I had neglect as a child but that was never discussed. I don't know how to talk to people because i haven't learnt it as a kid, i don't know how to connect with people... All my negative symptoms are also symptoms of Cptsd. Is there a correlation?
This would be a question for a mental heath professional!
Hello Anna and the team. I've just discovered your free Daily Practice Course having watched a few of your videos and I really appreciate your wonderful generosity of spirit in sharing what you've learnt. However, I'm grappling with understanding the writing exercise!! For example..'I am resentful of my neighbour because I have fear that....' that's when I get stuck! My feeling about her is jealousy about how much money she has and the fact that she drives a fancy car with a personalised number plate etc etc (I genuinely don't want a fancy car, I'm very happy with the one I have)...So I'm judging her I think...But. what I don't get about the writing exercise is ...what am I fearful of? I'd really appreciate someone explaining that bit to me! I'm now feeling fearful that everyone on here will think I'm totally stupid!!
I hope you take the free course. This very question is answered in great detail in the FAQ videos.
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Thank you for getting back to me. I really appreciate that. I'm actually in the process of taking the course. I haven't got to the FAQ bit so I'll have a look. Thanks again!
@@CrappyChildhoodFairyHello again. I've listened to the FAQ about my question but I still don't understand I'm afraid. This is where I get stuck: For example. 'I have resentment at my son's Dad because I have fear that he isn't giving me any money for our son'. What am I missing? This doesn't make sense to me. I'm not FEARFUL that he isn't giving me any money...I'm irritated/annoyed/cross. I'm truly not trying to be obtuse here...I just don't understand it.
I've been in therapy on and off for 10 years, had a therapist, nurse practitioner, psychiatrist, multiple primary care doctors in different cities all over the country due to moving around and been on lots of medication over the years and I don't think you could've said it better they really just have been limping everything in with generalized anxiety disorder and chronic depressive episodes like my medical reports day depressive episodes relapse reoccurring but I'm like had that been my entire life? What does that mean ? I've never heard of cptsd before your channel and I feel it's not only my main problem but also some of the people around me as well and since discovering this my healing journey has made more leaps and bounds in a few months than it has over the last decade of so called professional help
Thank you for sharing this. Glad you are here.
Nika@TeamFairy
Their youngster dons take over the same harassment do they keep you in an unsafe status day and night hoping you fall apart while they enjoy my possibilities in their life. One of the misunderstood illnesses are all trauma created stress: gland problems cause metabolism going haywire. Make you fat and heavy in two days 25 kilos! Etc. It’s sick how these agendas were all along!
Nothing wrong with writing. That helped me before I knew it was therapeutic. Common sense is no longer common.
Addiction to one person is a horrible thing!!.. Because of past problems with this I more or less avoid relationships with women....
I feel very uncomfortable around a particular person who is very loud and tells negative stories in a very dramatic way. If I ask her if she can tone it down a bit, SHE gets triggered and says she has always been shut up and she’s not going to be shut up anymore. I tell her I’m interested in what she is saying and I’m not trying to shut her up. I like her but it seems that we can’t be together.😢
New here.
Thank you!
I bet Martin is not Angela's first "victim"....
I think something that would be really good for us all if you would be open to it. You doing a zoom call for free once or twice a week for us all to have that safe space with people who are like us. (Just a suggestion)
Anna and other CCF coaches do free Zoom calls already! They're free for those who took Anna's free course, The Daily Practice. If you're interested, here's a link to the course: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
This is true about the easily attached.
In Australia, the problem arises from the fact that psychiatrists adhere strongly to the DSM-V and the biological model of psychological/psychiatric health. All problems are a result of neurotransmitter receptors or pathways within the brain. You are faulty if you have these problems - and need to be 'controlled' by the use of medications that act on these receptors - despite the lack of robust evidence of efficacy. SSRI's, SRNI's, antipsychotics such as Aripiprazole, and so forth.
Patients are abused and denigrated. Women are mostly dismissed as malingerers, manipulative Borderline personalities or BiPolar - and given Lithium - sometimes forcibly under State order under the Mental Health Act.
Women leave psychiatric units heavily sedated and unable to think.
There is enough evidence in Australia for a government review that nearly 60 % of women leave psych units far more traumatised than when they were admitted, because they are seen as non-compliant, 'naughty' and need discipline, denigrated and demeaned. It is NOT routine for any Australian psychiatrist to take a history of either childhood abuse, or the frequent follow on: domestic abuse. In effect , women are punished and abused for having been abused. Their life is re-written for them.
Some people have lost the privilege to be in my life.
🙏🏽💪🏼✌🏽 to all.
Unfortunately I know the "stuck" feeling all too well...
Thanks💌
I thank you 🙏
You are welcome!
Nika@TeamFairy
Thanks a lot ,I really appreciate what you are doing.
If we are talking about a situation when person has: nervous dysregulation, direaleasition and depersonalisation.
May be empath
And have cptsd
What to do in that situation?
My tryings to just live isn’t working because of experience with ddd and cptsd,so it doesn’t make for me sense
My nervous system was so sensitive and having a lot of stress,
It’s even hard just to do something
Thank you for watching. You may like The Daily Practice (free course): bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
Happy Risks Ya'll
Saw a video w Van der Kolk of The Body Keeps the Score and he said MDMA is one of the few therapies that work.
I'm sure I heard that book get mentioned. Do you know where it is the video? I actually saw it in a store today while looking for something else.
The two books she mentioned are at 26:
26:16
Thank you Anna. I usually listen on Spotify. I wanted to find the books I knew I'd heard you mention. I am so grateful to be living in this time. If I hadn't seen your videos accidentally I wouldn't know about CPTSD.
I would honestly be curious if Angela has a criminal record or any other run ins with the law??
Thank ❤ you❤
You're welcome!
Nika@TeamFairy
Christine Albright
"BRILLIANT VIDIO"♥️!...
"THANK you"💖!...
"+"!..."💖!...
Sometimes I struggle with the " victim mentality"....
Ery word out of your mouth is truth, down to not being able to use knife and fork. ( I still don't at 68. Comb back of hair. Your a genius. Could you be L handed?
3:50
❤❤❤
What part of Norway is your mother from?
What's the difference between Asperger's and add ???
Asperger's is an outdated term used to describe a "milder" form of autism. AD(H)D is Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder.
Does anyone have a list of the steps
Search for “12 steps of aa” and they’ll come right up.
You don’t know how much you need Christ, until Christ is all you have.
Amen
Angela invaded Martin's Privacy IMO...
Ive just given up
Trauma-driven thinking can be discouraging. But never forget: Healing is possible! If you haven't already, you may want to try Anna's free course ‘The Daily Practice’. It is the technique that led to Anna’s own healing, and she uses it to this day. Here’s a link if you’re interested: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
Wts the daily practice thing?
You have to buy her courses, she doesn't ever give any immediate answers in these. I wish she did though.
That's not true. The daily practice is free
@@ktrimberger , what is the practice?
In the description under the video is a link to THE DAILY PRACTICE, and it is FREE to learn!
The Daily Practice is a free course that provides the technique that led to Anna’s own healing, and she uses it to this day. Here’s a link if you’re interested: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
1:51:04
Its not free if u ask ppl to give there data for it kindly stop lying yo traumatized ppl stop leveraging trauma for ur marketing data