Coming out to Fundamentalist Christian Family - 8 weeks on T
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- Опубликовано: 3 окт 2024
- In this video, I reflect on my religious background, lessons learned from coming out as queer a few years ago, and my very recent experience coming out to my fundamentalist mom and sister. At 10:42, I talk directly to folks going through difficulties with their religious beliefs/family members.
Links I mention in this post:
Letter to my sister and advice to folks coming out to fundamentalist family - loveisvulnerabi...
My letter to my mom - loveisvulnerabi...
My reaction to my mom's first response - loveisvulnerabi...
My emailed reply to my mom's religious objections - loveisvulnerabi...
About me: I'm a nonbinary trans FTM-ish POC documenting my experiences and the latest transition in my life: HRT.
Check out my blog at / loveisvulnerability
RUclips Channel: / loveisvulnerability
omg im crying!!! my family is evangelical reformed presbitarian and im ftm. im still a christian. im so fuking scared of telling my dad and this was vey encouraging. i still dont know when or how to tell him, but i have an idea now. i seriously give you mad props dude.
Hello! Hang in there! It's rough, I know! Just be prepared for the worst (housing, finances, etc) but hope for the best. Comment here or message me on Tumblr if I can help with anything!
+Love is Vulnerability thx!! :) whats your tumbler?
loveisvulnerability.tumblr.com
Thank you so much for this! My family is Pentecostal, and they take Christianity very seriously. (Everything they do revolves around God.) Unfortunately, though, like your family, their beliefs are very non-affirming, a circumstance that has really made me reevaluate my faith. Although I still believe (obviously differently than they do), there's definitely a huge emotional divide between them and I, but as of late, I've been coming to terms with the fact that I don't *need* their "approval"/emotional guidance... I'm completely out (also as non-binary trans) and am doing okay without their support.
P.S. I've been really enjoying following your journey! (both on here and on tumblr)
P.P.S. I would definitely be interested in hearing of how you walked away from their brand of Christianity!
Thanks for the comment and for sharing a little about your experience! You're right about the approval issue. For me it wasn't so much me wanting their approval as wanting to maintain my identity as a Christian in their eyes. But it's the same I guess. It's hard to let go of that. Good luck with your continued journey. I'll see about doing a video on my Christian history one of these days. Good to talk with you!
wishing you all the best in getting through this difficult time with family. i'm sure this video will be very helpful to people who are in a situations similar to yours.
while i myself am not religious, my entire family is very, *very* deeply religious, so that complicates things for me. sigh.
I think I could be atheist and coming out as trans or queer would be just as hurtful to my mom. When I came out as queer, she said it made her want to puke when I said I was a Christian. Accepting her rejection of my religious identity was hard. But it's much easier to accept the pronouncement that I'm going to hell than to try to convince her what I believe. It's wasted effort and incredibly painful.
Thanks for the comment. And good luck with your family situation. Each family member will be a different situation. And each person's understanding of their religion will bring new complications.
And thanks for your videos. I related to your most recent video about distance. It's such a helpful thing for me right now. And coming out to myself required it.
yeah... came out to my mom about not being religious 12 years ago and to say that that was tough for the both of us would be an understatement.
i may be way off base with this, but for a parent who believes that there is only one true religion/path to god, a child coming out as being of a different religious path would be just as painful as a child coming out as not being religious at all. then add being queer or trans onto that and yeah... maybe our parents' situations are similar in some ways.
and based on what you said in your video about how this time around you've made it clear that in coming out you aren't looking for her approval, you're just informing her of how things are, i think we have some things in common as well.
i haven't really commented or anything, but i've been following your videos and i appreciate you putting your experience out there. it's nice to hear about others' situations because it makes me feel... a little less alone in mine, i guess. so thank you. :)
I think you're very right about what our families probably have in common. It must be difficult to know or think your loved one is refusing your beliefs and your eternity I guess. There's a kind of love that motivates this grief and anger. I can understand the need to grieve. It makes me sad to know though that that "love" trumps other kinds of love such as acceptance, emotional intimacy, support, and even curiosity about my life and experiences and goals.
And I feel exactly the same about hearing other's stories. Following some folk's experience has helped me feel less alone. And sharing mine especially has had that effect. When I started making videos a few months ago, I thought only of helping out others (like myself) who'd been watching videos and trying to learn and also imagine their lives differently. But I've discovered quickly that sharing my experience has given me more of an opportunity to express myself, be in community, and be I guess comforted by others. It's an amazing thing.
And thanks for following and for commenting. It definitely makes me feel more connected in a real way. Will look forward to continuing the connection across the miles and various social media platforms!