Exploring how my psychiatric service dog can help with ADHD and Anxiety
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- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- Chloe and I begin working with a trainer. Follow our journey: @servicedaug (Insta, Twitter)
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To work with Chris (they/them): hetlinger.pro (service dogs require some in person sessions, but Chris can work completely remotely for other types of training -- emotional support animals are great for ADHD, too!!)
For more on service animals: www.ada.gov/re...
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Music for "Exploring how my service dog can help with ADHD and Anxiety:"
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I feel like I spend so much effort masking symptoms, but if someone asked me to list them i'd be like "errrrr?"
Thats exactly what i was thinking
Same.
Exactly!!
Yeah
Same!
Hello Brains! I know this series is very different from my regular content and won't apply to everyone, but it's something I need to do for me right now. It's also helpful for the people it's helpful for, so I think it's still worth doing. From here on we'll be doing the normal 2 videos a month that are just about ADHD, and post these occasionally. Feel free to skip them if they're not your thing -- and if they are, let us know what you'd like to see in this series in the future! Or follow the full journey on Instagram & Twitter - @servicedaug
Don't mind. We are happy about every content, that can help us. You can only do what is in your time. If this is something, that can help you, than it is important as well. Because what helps you, can help other people as well.
It's really helpful to know about different aspects of our Adhd even if it's things we don't experience because others around me may experience them!
@@MrCrunsh thank you so much for understanding
I hope you have a wonderful day!
I don't struggle in the same way, but this was helpful in hearing the conversation about needing help and being ok with needing something. This is a very hard thing for a lot of people, ADHD or not, so thank you. And I'm so sorry to hear about your mom.
I literally heard that phrase "the opposite of disabled isn't abled, its ENabled." 2 days ago and it shook my world view.
It made me cry tonight.
What does it mean? I'm not a native English speaker, sorry...
@@allebasaiadartse3951 a few months late :) but I interpret it ENabled as someone whose skills and development match the environments so they can do anything they want without having to ask for accommodations or learn coping strategies/skills
This just completely changed my perspective of life!
Their trying to hide your disability. Disability isn't a slur but ableist are trying to make it a slur.
Internalized ableism - it's a big thing to overcome that.
Having to feed my cats in the morning Before 9am and a bit after 6 pm seems to be keeping me alive
omg same, Chloe is the reason I can't stay in bed all day and cry
We are twins, I don't think I'd leave my bedroom if it wasn't for my cat and the tiny crack in my door 😸
One is patient, but the other 20 pounder likes to jump on my chest. 😭
♡♡♡
That is me with my guinea pigs. Poop swoop at 6am and poop swoop/veggies at 6pm. Also daily snuggles.
I love how the trainer talks to you. Everybody should have someone like them in their lives.
Right?? They've been exactly what I needed. Super validating and encouraging.
@@HowtoADHD and really insightful! thank you so much for sharing
They’re extremely wise!!! Such good words from her
My german (ukc) boxer Kimbo is my service dog hes been working for 9 years he'll be 10 next week 3/16.
They are angels without wings. I had him for my PTSD. About 5 years ago I realize that he without any prior training. As you know we have no patience like waiting in any line ex; Walmart registers, DMV, restaurants...etc.so what he has been doing even before he was my service dog is whenever I sit down he come and put his face literally on my shoulders and his paws on whatever I'm sitting on. So I'd just pet him, it wasnt until one day about 5 years ago that I told " ya bájate, ya me cansé". ( yes hes trilingual). Which means "ok get down, I'm tried".
So it's a kinesthetic he tires me out so I can sit still for about 30 to 45. Before he either comes and makes me pet him or we leave.
The idea that you need a "severe" enough disability to get help is super harmful. It's completely artificially created to boot. There's more than enough help to go around. Rather, there should be. If we made marginally different choices as a society.
That point about "wearing your disability on the outside" was a really good one too. Being disabled, that's something I've had to come to terms with recently too. Something that kinda helped me was my shrink said that "shame is a reaction to other people's judgment." That kinda made it click for me as I'm well aware how dumb society is when it comes to disabled people and so why should I care about their judgments lol.
yeah, agreed. And it's so relative, too. I got that concept from growing up with a brother with more labels than me. Compared to him, I was fine, so I figured he was the one that deserved support. As if it's an either/or proposition.
@;; m&m 's 💞 oh🥺 hang in there. Makes my heart hurt for you
@;; m&m 's I'm at the end of my lunch break & need to get back to work, but, want you to know I care about you, fellow "brain"! Living in a toxic environment SUCKS!!!!
I wish I had answers for you. At least everyone here knows your pain. Sending a "hug"!
@;; m&m 's You are NOT a shameful person. I work with someone who is like you and I didn't know they had it til they told me that they had it. I always thought they were and still are wonderful as a person. It makes them unique and the person they are. Your Dad telling you that, his behavior is what's shameful. There is nothing to change about you. You may need to adjust somethings but that is not changing you as a person.
there is NO help where I come from
I'm so glad you decided to follow through with this. Just because people can't necessarily "see" your disability/struggles doesn't mean you don't deserve a service dog. Again, thank you for raising awareness about ADHD, your videos have really helped me with my own struggles. They made me feel like I am not alone as a woman with ADHD and it is a REAL thing. Our challenges are real.
Exactly as neuro diverse individuals most people think our disabilities are invisible
i guess im asking the wrong place but does any of you know a method to log back into an instagram account??
I stupidly lost the password. I would love any help you can offer me.
Yes thank you. I was fired from several jobs only bc of tardiness and absenteeism. I finally disclosed my severe adhd to my boss. They asked what accommodations will help and I had no idea but now I'm the top ranked employee, just with a flexible schedule.
It's uncomfortable to acknowledge your own faults, let alone discuss them. People are taking ADHD more seriously, and I hope testing/screening has gotten better.
My son's autism service dog helped us so much. She has now retired at 11 and is now trying to be a pet and not a service dog. Even when we weren't sure how to help him, our service dog did. That is why they are so wonderful, they just know.
That’s awesome! I have an autism SDIT. He’s still learning as he’s still a puppy. My dog knows what I need & it’s incredible.
Now I want a service dog. I didn't know dogs could help for ADHD in the ways you show in your video. You make me reconsider the ways in which I can get more support. You're amazing!
Yeah, I've been surprised at how easily she does some things that are so hard for me! She brings me my meds every night now, automatically, without fail. Sometimes more than once haha...she's still learning the cues, but she never forgets.
btw look into emotional support animals for ADHD too, they don't require as much training and you can always still teach them to do some of this stuff :)
Honestly same here, for me it's Dyspraxia (so different but similar to ADHD) and yup, having a service dog would definitely be helpful.
Please only get a service dog if you absolutely NEED one. It’s not fun. You have to deal with fakes, access issues, and more nonsense. Please educate yourself on the ADA laws before you decide to get one or not
I’m very vulnerable am I able to get a survice dog for that I’m also autistic and have panic attacks x
She looks like she would drive you every where if she could
I really think she would. She was all ready to do whatever I needed! haha
I was thinking that as well! Like she was trying to figure out how to drive ❤
Yes! I love how she looked at the steering wheel!
Wish I could have help driving 😂
"I don't know but if you need me to I'll try!"
I’ve always felt invisible when I was younger. I still do since I am always there for others and not addressing my own needs first. This was touching to watch. I just wish that people will take having ADHD seriously. With ADHD, there’s a lot of mental health challenges that come with it as well. I am so thankful for this channel. It’s very encouraging! God bless you.
Thank you! I'm hoping that taking Chloe with me places will give me a chance to educate people on how much of a struggle ADHD (& anxiety) can be.
That seems to be a trend among disabled people. Even the undiagnosed people I know.
@@HowtoADHD I'm glad. I had someone heavily imply that I should get off my meds (they don't even know what I take) because they can cause insomnia and when I told him I had ADHD, he said that he looked it up once and was pretty sure it was fake
@@bubblesnopemporium5880 the comment wasn’t to me, but I hope that you’re able to see another doctor or someone else that will take you seriously. I’m sorry that happened to you.
Now i have just to remember that by heart for the next time i would need such words and thoughts
I love her look when you ask her if she can drive, like, "Well, OK, I'll give it t try."
"It's like you're wearing your disability on the outside now, and it's hard..."
Oooh, yes! Spot on!👍
That's one of the things your channel has helped me with - a BIG one.
I've had my disability overlooked continuously throughout my entire 41 years of life.
So much so that even *my family* thought I was BS'ing when I spoke out about it for the first time.
My mother still refuses to believe/understand - she just calls it "going off into your own little world again".
She even said I was "pretending", "making it up", "delusional", and many other such dismissive statements. 😤
It made me so mad it BECAME a trigger!
And she has worked with mental patients at a psych ward before so she should know the signs and know better than to trivialise it. 😭
Now I'm up-front with everyone about my "problems".
Some get it and are understanding, some look at you funny like you are confessing to a heinous crime or about to go psycho, and some it just doesn't register that you said the words.
Speaking honestly about what you can/can't deal with DOES make you feel better, you reduce the Guilt you feel, and also it's like you have given fair warning if everything goes sideways (like a growl or bark tells people to be aware of the dog).
So keep at it. I will.
Best of luck with the future 💗💗💗
Literally battling this now..i was diagnosed as a kid but the secondary affect, self doubt, rejections sensitivity, etc. had taken their toll on my adult life. My spouse as well as other pushed me to address this as an ADHD issue and now that i am realizing it is, when i ask for understanding and help its a problem or its just my problem to deal with alone. Im not sure how to react but it makes me pretty angry actually. Bu-jo has helped with organizations but getting people to ACTUALLY really understand and consider this is super hard since they are so conditioned to be frustrated and angry with me
My mother says the same exact things, except i am still very young so when i try to bring up that i suspect i have it she dismisses it and says im making it up for attention. The very first time i saw a therapist she suspected i had it and talked to my mom about the possibility of me getting tested and my mom yelled at me the whole time home. I never saw the therapist again
Just listening your trainer talking to you made me realize that just because I can function in some situations doesn’t mean I’m not disabled.
An amazing thing a service dog could do for someone with adhd: stay in the front of the door, on the outside of the room, while you are working on something inside, and the dog should keep anyone from entering because that could interrupt the fragile concentration.
oh that's a neat idea for people who keep getting interrupted! For me, Chloe stays with me while I work and acts like a kind of body double -- when I see her sleeping in my office, I know it's time to work. She's learned my routine and helps me stick to it :) I can't work late, cause that's when she gets a walk...or needs to be trained or fed...or played with :)
@@HowtoADHD That's neat. I thought about what could work for me, because I hate being interrupted, and often I can't continue what I was working on because of that.
I am so happy you answered to my comment. You are very inspiring and awesome.
I got a disability ID on Thursday. So get to use special needs parking lots, for my mobility and coordination issues, I can use disabled toilet for calming down in overstimmulation, don't have to worry about hitting things or me and hurting myself, I can use public transport and elevators, for disabled people, I don't have to pay for my health insurance, I don't have to pay for public transport, I can use my audio records in university without getting told I don't need it, I can take a caretaker with me on events, for free, so they can watch out for me, if I shutdown or meltdown, I can get therapy, that helps me with organisation and my life and my brain, I get support for my joint pain and I feel finally good!
I am happy you feel good. what kind of disability do you have....ADHD?
Wow, that's Awsome. I struggle where to label myself disabled for my ADHD >
@@samrazie8942 Yes, among others, I reached 32 diagnosis 2 weeks ago, so it's pretty much a whole cluster.
Chronic pain, Migraines, Depression, Anxieties, HMS, ADHD and Autism being the biggest problems.
@@Selsmittenxo struggle to use the term for yourself or getting diagnosed or psyching yourself up to get evaluated for ADHD?
As someone with ADHD and considering if a service dog would help, I love this series! I’ve had trouble finding resources to consult, so it’s great to see what the process might look like if I were to get one.
Oh nice! Working with Chris has been fantastic so far (hetlinger.pro), they can train emotional support animals, service dogs, etc. if you have any questions I'm sure they'd be able to answer!
@@HowtoADHD i reached out. My work said if my little chihuahua is trained to do specific tasks that she could come to work with me possibly. I really need the med reminder plus i have anxiety and depression and PTSD
I don’t know whether you’re the right person to ask for this or not but I have a question. I already have a dog, he’s an amazing and sweet 5 year old lab but training him to do these little tasks is practically impossible. He’s just lazy and really confused. Do you think I should keep trying to train him or that I should try convincing my parents to get me an actual service dog?
"The point is to being more functional in the world, no less"
Powerful! 😍
Love your videos, your blogs and advices, even from faraway places like Mexico, keep it going
I'm also training a service dog to help with my ADHD, anxiety and sensory issues! It is a lot of work but she had already been able to help in so many ways!
Oh that's so cool to hear!! What have you been training her to do?
@@HowtoADHD We are working on leash skills and public access training primarily right now. I am also working on training her to smell the chemicals released when I am entering into an anxiety attack. She is also working on disrupting me if I have not engaged with her in 3-4 hours to continually break me from hyperfocus.
@@HowtoADHD I am also trying to work with her so that when I give the command "overload" she finds a quite and secluded place for me to calm down. Along with alerting whomever I might be with that there is a situation!
Haw does your dog help you with sensory issues? That sounds like it would work but I don't know why
@@dabi5967 We are training her to recognize when the warning signs for when I'm going into sensory overload. Dog's can smell when your body is entering a panic state. When she recognizes that she is going to find a quite place and administer deep press therapy to help ground me through the panic state.
"It almost feels like to justify me needing that help and asking for that help, it feels like I need to be struggling harder than I am." Well damn that hit hard. That sort of barrier as well as imposter syndrome stopped me getting help for so long and made me feel guilty about getting it too. So often back the and even now I question whether it is even okay for me to be on medication or to be seeing a psych or to speak up when I'm struggling because I don't think I'm struggling enough to deserve it. That is such a hard thing to overcome.
“Stigma is a powerful barrier. Strength comes from vulnerability.” Everyone needs a Lexa in their life🥺🖤🖤
This is soooo helpful...as someone with adhd myself, I found grief a really hard thing to deal with. In school, we were able to get dogs in.
The emotions you’re feeling now are a very normal part of anyone’s service dog journey. I went through this too. It is an identity shift to go from someone who can “pass” as not disabled, to someone who is visibly marked as disabled. It takes some getting used to for sure!
You got good advice from your trainer; I always describe it to my clients as this:
If someone who’s physically disabled needs to use a walker some of the time, but doesn’t need it around the house, should they still have a walker? Obviously, yes, no one would think twice about that. Or how about someone who only needs glasses to read, but can see fine otherwise? Should they not be allowed to use the glasses if they don’t need them 100% of the time?
A service dog is medical equipment too, and it is totally valid for you to do what works best for YOU 😊 btw, her training is looking good!
"the opposite of disabled isn't abled, it's enabled" that was something I lowkey really needed to hear
Wow. I had never considered that the opposite of disabled is enabled. That, in itself, is empowering. Thanks.
"Your value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth."
"Learning how to be more functional in the world."
Wow. I never thought of myself that way. I feel you on the stigma struggle. I'm fifty and I've never really had much help. So much food for thought. You certainly are a font of self discovery aren't you?. I continue to learn more about myself from you than I've ever gotten before. Please keep throwing those keys out there. My kingdom becomes more functional and rich every time you do.
I came across this channel about 5 days ago and have been binge-watching videos and devouring information. I've only recently (at 35) been diagnosed with ADHD, and watching your videos has given me so many AHA moments. Things I thought were just me being a weird kid, patterns of behavior that never made sense until now, and so much more. It's like each video polishes another side in the kaleidoscope that is me and my ADHD.
I have two wonderful dogs myself, a 14 year old senior and a 2.5-year youngster, and your idea of training Chloe to support you is wonderful. I get up in the morning because my girls need a walk and breakfast. Without them, I'd probably just sleep like a dead person. Chloe is amazing, and I am excited to follow your journey and training
I know exactly what you mean, I was diagnosed about a month ago at 45, this channel is an awesome source of information, it's so nice to hear someone discussing ADHD struggles in a positive way. Did you go through any mourning for the life you could have had? I was diagnosed as a kid but never treated or even told about it, so when I found out, I had a period of a couple of weeks just asking myself what could have been? I'm passed that now and actually see my diagnosis as very liberating, I now realize that I am not like everyone else, and trying to be that way is only detrimental to my headspace. Long live me with ADHD and the life I still have ahead of me with a new found understanding of how my brain works,
This video could not have come at a more perfect time. I'm 17(F) and recently got diagnosed with ADHD. Before diagnosis, my dad got me a puppy and I felt to overwhelmed with the responsibility of taking care of the puppy as well as get good grades. Fast forward to four months later; I'm so grateful he got me one. I have never known a more pure love in my life. I eventually got another puppy (from the same pack as the first one) and they truly help me calm down in difficult circumstances and make me feel good again.
I hope everything works out great Jessica 🔆🌺
The way the dog looked at the steering wheel like "I'll do it for you but you'll have to teach me how too"❤ love that
I saw a notification at 27 seconds....seeing you has made my day.....now, to watch it.
Ugh, I so understood what you were saying when you talked about having an identity shift and how when you were growing up your struggles had to be ignored because so many people were struggling more than you were. I was not diagnosed until I was 33, so I got chastised for anything I struggled with. Everyone else needed to come first, so if I brought attention to my struggles, which everyone thought I brought them on myself, that would make me selfish. So I worked hard at hiding them, which caused me a lot of anxiety and made me feel like I was pretending to be someone else. Since I lived for so long that way, when it came time stop hiding, I had and still have trouble with the old tapes playing in my head telling me I should be able to do this without any help. I wish I had an easy solution, but listening to this video really helped me to see that if my goal is to stop struggling, then putting systems in place that will help me function better, doesn't seem so bad. The struggles cause me shame and anxiety. If asking for help gets rid of my struggles then the shame and anxiety will not be as bad, I hope.
I really relate to this, 100 percent. Thank you for sharing 💛
Having ADHD when no medication offers a benefit is a battle.
I know exactly what you mean.
All the meds I've tried just make me more depressed than usual.
Like a robot, unable to enjoy anything.
So I had to stop them all and just live with it - which is SUPER hard.
Things like this channel are mega-helpful and make me feel normal and are calming for a while.
🤗
you've probably already heard this, but exercise helped me a lot when my parents wouldn't let me take stimulants.
😔I know, I wish I could find medication that helps my child. Good luck.
@@g.s9943 you need to have the executive skill to make yourself do exercise first though, sadly...
@@Felsenkeks Just keep trying, it gets easier if you keep trying. It just takes longer to build the habit than it does for Normals.
this is amazing! I've been watching you since I was 12 (when i was diagnosed with ADHD) you're videos are really helpful! thank you :)
I was telling my mom about this and she doesn’t believe in ADHD service dogs. It gets really frustrating when my parents won’t believe that their are other ways to help with ADHD besides meds
what about emotional support animals? add.org/adhd-dogs-work/ and you could always still train them to help you :)
@@HowtoADHD thank you 🥰 I love your work
My parents wont take me to see a doctor about adhd and have always told me im fine. Even though everyone ive ever met has asked me if i have adhd and i have almost all the traits. They have also said even if you do what does it matter you dont need to see anyone... Like what?
my parents don't believe in meds. I got diagnosed with ADHD by a doctor. and I am left untreated. now I am 21 years old. every day is a struggle. my room is a mess. my hair is a mess. my school studying aaah ......
@@charlieaddams5331 You should tell them people can't possibly have cancer then. People like this infuriate me. This is just abusive dismissal and if your parents continue to do that, you should move out ASAP and get diagnosed.
There is no point in my opinion to keep people around in your life who outright deny the reality of what you struggle with.
Jessica, I don't know whether you've mentioned the "dopamenu" on your fridge in another video, but it's a fantastic idea and I'd love to see a full snapshot.
She has a video on dopamenus! I think if you just search her channel for the keyword it should come up
@@elizabethlundin3112 How embarrassing. I had the thought and then somehow convinced myself not to do the search. Gah. :)
Hoo boy, turns out I've *already watched that video.*
I love watching you, and I am sorry you are grieving. I remember those days when I could not think through the grief. I have been feeling a bit better recently . First time since my dad died last year..... Shreds me still. Much love to you!!!
I would love to see more on having a therapy or service dog - it’s not a treatment option with much visibility and I want ti learn more about it! Please keep us updated on this!! 🐕
Therapy dogsdo not work for one person, they only work in hospitals, schools and nursing homes.
Thank you so much for posting your vulnerabilities and journey. I can’t explain how much you have been helping me (32 m from England) I have adhd and my mum is sick at the minute and it is something I worry about. It must have been, and still be so hard..but I just want to thank you for being you. If you’re ever on this side of the pond I’d love to somehow meet you one day. Keep your head up :)
I'm so sorry to hear that. It is hard, yeah, it's like no other loss I've experienced. Moms are so much of what make us who we are. I hope yours recovers soon
@@HowtoADHD oh wow, it’s made my day you replied. Thank you for your kind words it means a lot. I hope everything goes as easy as it possibly can do with your grief too Jessica. I’m just sorry I can’t help as much as you help me with learning do deal with ADHD...but if you ever need help building robots or decide to do a talk near the University of Manchester then I’m your man! All the best
WOW!! Breaking out of *hyperfocus* , regulating *emotions* , and forgetting to take *medications* are *MY* top three *ADHD* issues as well!
AND, _I've never had anyone lay it out and define it in those terms before!_ Thank you Jess for your _mindfulness_ !
fellow brain here , I'm crying because of when she said "My whole life I feel like i've needed help and not really gotten it" I never felt more understood and related so much. maybe I should get some help....
Thank you for being so vulnerable. Much of what you said in today’s video really resonated with me.
Thank you. I appreciate that more than you know. I'm trying to be authentic with my journey which is really scary, comments like this make it worth it
@@HowtoADHD authenticity is something I strive for because it seems like it would help the people around me. Seeing you do it too shows me my instinct was right!
5:50 is hackin important and everyone should listent to this
I am going to write that down and put it up somewhere it's very clear to see 👏
Thank you for changing my Life in something better. After i saw your Ted-Talk some weeks ago, i made the decision to go to a therapist and ask for help. Without this, i wouldn't had made the step.
Currently i start my medication-therapy and try to work with the brain, that makes me so special and different.
Thank you for this, and please thank your trainer on my behalf. Some of her responses on being disabled vs enabled, her insight on support, touched me deeply and has helped me see things in a new light.
I am newly diagnosed, and am a cancer survivor, and I also struggle with crisis identity because of them. You sharing this journey has helped me sift through thoughts and mindset more than you'll ever know.
Thank you.
Chloe, thank you. I've been going through many years of depression and anxiety issues. As I prepare to get accommodations at my community college to help me work through these problems, I must define myself as disabled. That hurts. I absolutely need accommodations but, I loathe the thought of being disabled. Thank you for helping me begin to see with a clearer perspective. It will take me awhile to move past the stigma, but now I understand the principles required to do so. I also appreciate your message that just because I'm not always suffering, that doesn't mean that help isn't always needed. Hahaha..... I came here searching for psychiatric service dogs. Thankfully, I got a lot more!
Chloe is the name of her dog jsyk :) Her name is Jessica. I hope you got the accommodations you need for school!!
Chris seems to be an amazing trainer. It's really nice to see them empowering you to get to the core of what kind of help Chloe can provide for you!
Yeah! I didn't realize they would need to coach me through all the emotions around it too, but they've been amazing at it. I'm so so glad to have their guidance & support. Do you have a dog too?
@@HowtoADHD Yes, I do have a dog :) Her name is Mira, she's a Jack Russell Terrier Mix and almost 11 years old. She gives my ADHD brain so much help in staining grounded and having a structure to my day!
I have adhd, anxiety and chronic depression. I’ve just begun considering getting a psychiatric service dog and you’re videos are so helpful.
Thank you. 🤍 This perspective on "disability" really helps in terms of being able to handle the term and not let the feeling of stigma impeed my ability to use support that's available to me.
"my problems didn't matter, cause there were other people that were struggling harder than I was" This is what kept me from getting help that I genuinely needed. I was surrounded by people struggling with worse yet achieving more than me, so I assumed I could do what they did if I just tried a little more. I felt bad feeling anything, because my problems weren't as bad as my friends' and family's.
"The opposite of disabled is not abled. It's enabled."
#1 thing that made me cry today
I go back and forth a lot on whether to call myself disabled. I'm comfortable now saying that I'm neuroatypical/neurodivergant but i'm not ready to claim a disability label (yet) because like you said i'm not sure if i meet the threshold of the point where it's disabling.
yeah, it's tricky right? Especially with ADHD. But at the end of the day, Chloe helps me enormously and I'm glad the ADA has protections in place for that kind of support. I think of it like dungeons and dragons...she's good at stuff I'm not, so I'm adding her to my party. :) I might not need to take her into every battle, but when I need to, I'll be able to.
@@HowtoADHD neurodifferent doesn't necessarily mean disabled
I don't feel invisible with my dog.
This video is so healing and powerful. I won't even overwhelm you with the story. I will just give a deep heartfelt thank you.
The "enabling" line put so much in context for me and my ADHD.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m also a woman who couldn’t describe or acknowledge the struggles. At 26 my partner who also struggles with adhd recognized the same struggles I had and suggested I get evaluated. I ended up checking almost every symptom that I didn’t even know was a symptom. It’s one of those things where if you’re “functioning” and “successful” enough, it’s very easy to dismiss. I didn’t know that I didn’t need to fight so hard for every little thing, and even though I CAN get by and be successful without help, that doesn’t mean I SHOULD. Thank you for validating an experience that is very real for a lot of us
"The opposite of disabled is not able. It's enabled."
I just got my dog Ari serviced for PSA. I am going through the shift now. I really appreciate this video. Thank you.
These recent videos have been so helpful in giving me some more of the language needed to describe what I feel and need and I'm really grateful to you!
"Being disabled means that society is disabling you. Being enabled means that society is enabling you." Wow, I am *so* glad to have that in my head right now.
I still have so much trouble seeing that my issues are not my fault, and this line really nailed what I'd been wondering lately, that how I might work best just doesn't quite fit with how society works. Not something I should be angry about, but definitely not something I should feel at fault for either. Thanks for your videos, everything I've seen so far has been incredibly insightful!
Regardless of whether or not we think it applies to us, it does. This is so IMPORTANT because the discussion around ADHD as a disability is not out in the open, and it needs to be talked about. Talking about needing help, what it means to have a disability, and that stigma surrounding it is all important and changes society for all of us in a positive way. Thank you for being so brave!
Can I just point out that to see the clutter in the bathroom and in the bedroom just relieved me and made me feel less bad, less alone in the struggle. So thank you
Oh man I was looking for resources on making my dog a service dog and I can't believe how much I relate to the mental gymnastics about making this decision...literally brought me to tears, thank you for sharing
This series is so meaningful to me.
It was before, but now I lost someone.
I was working with an elderly lady the last 2 years. It was just a job in the beginning. She has dementia and needs help with preparing food, personal hygiene, just someone who goes with her step by step through the day. She was really cold and often in a bad mood, and I wasn't feeling well either.
But over time, and even though she can't remember who I am, we build this wonderful relationship with each other. It's one of the closest relationships I ever had. Lots of cuddles and crying and being happy about the little things she discovered anew every few minutes.
I completely opened myself up to her and she as well. There werent many words, but more a deep connection that went beyond what I have ever felt with anyone.
On top of that, her family kind of became my family. The house of hers felt more like my home than my apartment. I was sure I would stay with her until she died and support her even in that time. She is 97.
Then her daughter (66) started bullying me. 2 months went by and it got worse and worse. She was controlling every little move I made, screaming, belittling, insulting me. I tried everything to find a solution. I think though, that she was jealous of my connection with her mother, something she herself never had.
It ended with her saying that the old lady is scared of me. She hates me, I treat her badly.
It was crazy stressful and not good for me at all. So I had to quit my job. I am no longer allowed to visit the old lady and to my surprise, I am grieving as if I lost a loved one. I didn't realise how much I loved her until now, and although I do not regret my decision, I am heartbroken.
This series honestly made me cry with how seen it has made me feel. I’m going the exact same struggles right now about wanting to train my dog as a psychiatric service dog and not feeling “valid” or “disabled enough”. Thank you for this. So many of the messages in this video were things I REALLY needed to hear.
As soon as you said that you felt invisible and like your problems didn't matter because someone else was struggling harder, I started crying. I've felt that way my entire life, but never really accepted it, and in a way, it was nice to hear. I'm not alone and my problems do matter and are valid, even if they're not outwardly as bad as someone else's. Thank you!
We all need help, and your "problems" need the attention that you've given us. I'm going through so much myself. Life throws so much at us, and to have a disability can make it more challenging. But your going to have those moments of, "I need help", and other days that you feel pretty good. God Bless you for doing what you're doing. You've pulled back the curtain of your life to us, and we don't think of you any different. I'm still a subscriber. #ADHDWORRIOR #ASWORRIOR
Wow this is a life changing video! It’s nice knowing I’m not useless or weak for needing help and never receiving support. I thought getting a service dog for myself would be pathetic but now I’m glad I can use it to my advantage
You're doing a good job! I just want you to know. ☺️
I really needed this tbh I really struggle with my anxiety and how it mixes with my adhd and I’ve been thinking of a service dog as an option however I’ve been stuck in this constant loop of you don’t need one, you can function some days, you do it for attention. But this kinda made me realise that it’s not the days that I can function, it’s the days that I can’t. So thank you :)
The trainer's point about not needing a service dog everyday but still having one because of a disability really hits home. I have a Cardiac dog and I constantly second guess it like "today was fine, in don't, do I wait deserve this?"
I was doing some research online about how to get my dog to be a psychiatric service dog and as soon as I read the word disabled I stopped cause I thought “no way, that can’t be me” and then I watched this video and it’s just mind blowing. It’s crazy how on top of everything that we struggle with on a daily basis, getting help for daily struggles, is such a struggle. I didn’t realize the stigma of the word disabled until I was asked to identify with it to get the help I need.
I started owner training my service dog, with the help of a professional trainer, in late 2020 as well, though I only recently found your channel! Over the past several years I've been coming to terms with my mental health diagnoses and untangling the internalized stigma around "mental health" versus "physical health". The more I learn and research, the more I come to understand that separating the "mental" from "physical" is so arbitrary- similar to the way we separate dental care from the rest of our health care; Mental health takes place in our body, causes physical symptoms, and changes the way we move through the world. Reframing it that way has really helped me untangle my internalized stigma and see the ways that my mental health is actually so inseparable from my physical health. I just wanted to share that, and let you to know that I related very much to a lot of what you said. Thanks for doing what you do!
Thank you - so much - for being willing to share such personal struggles. The word “disability” does hurt, and the stigma does hold us back. I’ve struggled with this for year, with several “invisible disabilities”. And had lots of people, including family, question the authenticity of my “need” for a service animal.
What you are doing, using your platform and voice, to share your experiences too - helps spread awareness and helps other people who may not otherwise understand, see from a different point of view.
So again, thank you.
Your channel has helped both me and my son with our ADHD. I recommend it to others often because of how well researched and well-made your videos always are.
Thanks for continuing to shine a light out for others even when you are experiencing personal darkness. This world is a better place because you are in it.
I'm pretty sure my cat is the only reason I'm here today, she chose me, and I felt special. Even if I don't trust my own assessment of my worth, I trust hers. She keeps me grounded and happier than I would be otherwise, and will let me know when petting is required lol. I can't imagine life without her and will miss her when she eventually passes far more than any other pet I've had, she was with me thru my hardest trials and my happiest days. Sugar is the best cat I could ask for, and nothing makes me feel better than petting my kitty
It's really empowering to see someone going through a service dog traning journey. I'm getting my prospect in may and will be starting traning then. It's sad to here that your struggling with wether or not you actually need a service dog, because that's something I deal with a lot.
I don't normally do much commenting, but I am currently playing with the idea of setting myself the long term goal of adopting a dog, raising said dog, and training said dog as a therapy dog to help me with my cocktail of ADHD, Autism, Depression and Anxiety. This channel has helped me take that step, lodging the idea in my mind while I've been going through intense psychological and psychiatric treatment at a clinic over the past few weeks. And I just want you to know that what you do here is great, you're great, and I hope you can get 'enabled' by Chloe
You can not have a Therapy dog. Therapy dogs do not work for one person, they only work with many people in institutional settings.
I have cried during every video you have posted in this series.
Thank you so much. You are wonderful, and so strong for sharing.
I'm tired of being told by people who don't get it/constantly having the little voice in my head say. "No one cares how hard it is for you, someone else has it harder. Or you're not struggling enough, you should be able to do it on your own." And honestly I can't cope on my own anymore, I need help. I'm just so tired of fighting my brain and pretending everything's OK. Your videos have shown my that I'm not along, and I'm allowed to struggle sometimes.
I know how it feels to struggle, and then on top of that, struggle to ask for help because I don't "look disabled." I'm glad to see you and Chloe progress with the training, and I hope it continues to work well for you. You have taught me to be a better advocate for myself and the students I tutor, some of whom have the same struggles as I do. Thank you for being so open and honest about your mental health. That's another thing you've helped me do as well. Thank you, Jessica.
PS--I will watch any and all content you post! 😊
Love your hoodie. And I think I making the first comment wow. And It’s great that you’re getting support.
My dog is my love, my comfort, my first & foremost. She’s beautiful & loving. And she’s never been trained……In addition; I’m epileptic and she helped/saved me when I had a seizure, on a city street….also never trained for that. Purely our love🐾♥️
What you said about feeling invisible when you were younger perfectly described how I felt as a kid too. Someone always had it harder in my house. And I was the one called on to help. My ADHD and ASD went unnoticed for 31 years because I always had to be the helper/adult. Until my husband finally got me to get help. I'm so glad you are able to start to find help - even empowerment - with Chloe now.
Thank you for your videos. I have a 7 year old with adhd and I have tried to devour anything I can find on adhd and how to assist him in learning how to regulate his world. It hasn’t been easy and the school system hasn’t been overly helpful or understanding. He is such a wonderful boy and so worth everything I can give him. Your videos have really helped me understand some things he may go through later in life and help give him the skills I hope will help, when he possibly encounters them. It is so hard to have an “ invisible” challenge and those who are around him forget because it isn’t visible or a 24 hour “thing” so they assume he is just being a pain, or there he goes again.. breaks my heart ❤️ thank you again .
Thanks for this video.. you're the first person I've found to mention unexpected loss/grief and service dogs. Unexpectedly losing my boyfriend has left me with so many "long term side-effects" over a year after his death. The depression has caused me to struggle with getting out of bed, struggling to eat, struggling to drink water, I've developed severe social anxiety/panic attacks in large groups of people, I will isolate myself to the point where I stay in my apartment for days having no desire to be outside or be around people. When I'm in public... I'm so dissociated from this world/reality that I'm not aware of my surroundings, I completely just wander the streets and stare into space.. almost as if my soul is floating and my body could just drop at any minute because nobody lives inside anymore.
When you said "I felt invisible because other people had problems that were worse than mine"... I broke down. That has morphed into me becoming so broken and shut down because of self neglect. It took so much to even spend the money to get my adhd diagnosis because I felt like I didn't deserve it. ($500+ because I don't have insurance)
Im sending some healing vibes to you, my dad passed away 2 years ago and I honestly don't think I've even started to process it.
You’re so inspiring, I hope you know that. Seeing you take action to help yourself in this way helps me feel kinder towards my own needs and struggles. Thank you for sharing this. Big virtual hug 💐
I'm in the process of training my assistance dog, and it only occurred to me an hour or so ago that there are likely things that Maggie can be trained to do to help me manage my ADHD. I don't think I really have a good grasp on the ways it impacts my everyday life - I've always put it down to mood imbalances or laziness or a lack of organisation but I'm a little hyperfixated on your videos right now and am learning so much. Thank you!
When you asked her to drive and she looked at the steering wheel so confidently 💀😂😂😂
I love what you have to say. It’s so true and I feel it’s a huge part of owning a service dog that no one talks about.
I have been struggling with taking Rylee out and about because (well I couldn’t figure out what it was until now) it does feel like it’s a huge flag of attention that I am disabled.
I really like that trainer ! It’s amazing that she came into your life to help you. Very wise and therapeutic. She knows not only how to help with a service dog but to help a owner have more acceptance as well to needing additional help. Keep it up Jess! You’re doing the best you can do. Again thank you for sharing your vulnerability so publicly. It’s appreciated 😊
Thank you for these videos! I am diagnosed as autistic and ADHD and i recently got a poodle puppy when my autism specialist and speech therapist recommended I get a service dog. I am now beginning the process of training my 6 month old poodle boy as an autism service dog. I especially need the medication reminders and DPT, as well as dog to comfort me and block when I’m having sensory overload and need help. ❤
I just watched your video and the tears have just been streaming down!!
I have been dealing with Bipolar 2 for most of my life & found out about 2 months ago - thanks to your channel & very supportive Psychiatrist that I have ADHD.
I'm also a dog trainer and behaviourist - EMA's are not recognized in South Africa but, I so desperately want to be become a Psychiatric service dog trainer.
As I live alone, my animals have been soo important in keeping me stable - so want to train my own dog & help others out here who so desperately need it.
Bless you for your channel & your strength - will be watching your other videos on this soon.
The sd imposter syndrome is SO unbelievably real!!! THANK YOU for making this video-it’s comforting to hear about someone else’s experience w an owner trained psdit ❤
Seeing these videos gives a really great kind of outside perspective because it is really easy for me to look at your situation and go "oh yeah, absolutely makes sense, and it's a wonderful thing to see that help being asked for and given", and then when the video ends look at myself and go "oh that's how the people around me see my situation," and makes acknowledging and seeking out that help a lot easier. So thank you for that, and I wish you a minimum of complications training Chloe and a lot of love and sympathy for everything going on.
Thank you for this Jessica. I started training my dog as an assistance dog a few years back for depression and anxiety, before I was diagnosed with ADHD.
I ended up having a severe depressive episode, and gave up on the training.
I was diagnosed during that episode, and much of what caused the episode came down to undiagnosed ADHD.
Since you first started posting about this, it reignited the motivation in me to follow through on this training. Last Monday, my Millie was officially approved as a trainee assistance dog, was measured for her jacket and had a photo taken for her ID card.
We wouldn't be here without your videos. You're doing an amazing thing.
This needs to be more mainstream! My dog is not officially trained but he learned on his own, he identifies actions and words that I do and say when I am struggling and he will react accordingly.
Idk where I can get him certified as a Psychiatric Service Dog but I could really use it.
Im so sorry about your loss. ❤️
So happy about Chloe! I got RICO when I was sad, too. He improved my life 100%. So happy for you!
The d20 clipboard!! I love it.
I was just diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type about a week or so ago, and this channel + some of the other resources I've found online have been extremely illuminating and, honestly, validating. Despite being considered "gifted" in elementary school, I quickly got to a point where I just couldn't stay engaged in school. I was constantly bored and fidgety in class; all of it felt so monotonous to me and my brain was always in completely different places all the time anyways. I could never finish assignments; I literally even got a D in HS art class. I'm 24 now, and have been in college for an entire 4 years, and have only successfully completed 2 years worth of courses. I can't sit down and focus on things, I constantly have 2,000 thoughts bouncing around my brain, I constantly need some other more immediate stimuli to satiate my boredom, I experience intense difficulty with following the steps needed to complete even a simple task. So many things that were embarrassments, that I thought were just "me," from chronic disorganization and messiness to being late everywhere to missing weeks of school work on a regular basis. I have felt so embarrassed for so long by what I perceive to be my high level of unreliability. I have so many interests and so many ambitions, but I feel like I might never live up to those things or operate to my fullest potential because I lack such a high degree of discipline and constantly feel so overwhelmed.
It's corny, but I almost feel as if I'll be able to actually start living when I start treatment in about a week or so. It just feels really nice to know that I'm not just inherently "incompetent," "lazy," "stupid," "incapable" etc., my brain just works differently and presents me with obstacles that others don't typically have to experience. Others naturally have a normal level of dopamine and norepinephrine, I don't and need a bit of extra help. I'm glad that this channel emphasizes that ADHD *is* an actual condition is *is* debilitating for the people that have it.
This is really eye opening for me as someone seeking testing for ADHD, someone very attached to dogs and intrigued by service dogs in particular, and someone who always thought of themselves as mentally well or mentally able until now. Coming to terms with the fact that my brain isn't how I've conceived of it for the past nearly 30 years and that the way I think, cope, feel are all affecting how I exist in the world (esp as a POC and also fairly newly out about being queer and trans nonbinary) is a lot. This vlog series (along with all your other videos and content) is truly comforting. Thank you for being willing to be seen, Jessica & Chloe 🐕💛
You blew my mind with this video. "The opposite of DISABLED is ENABLED. Thank you for sharing your journey and having the courage to be so open about it. You are an inspiration.
When they said the opposite of disabled is enabled I burst into tears, something about that statement is so powerful (I'm still crying lol). I really struggle with allowing myself to see my ADHD as a real disability to the point where I find myself criticizing other people with ADHD for getting the support and help that they need. Internalized stigma and ableism is a big barrier for so many people (across many disabilities) in getting the help they need, and this video is an amazing reminder that your needs are valid and worthy of support and treatment.
One of the reasons elementary school was so challenging for me and my parents was not so much the disabilities themselves than the fact that it was such a battle to get the support we needed from the school and the teachers. My elementary school was groundbreaking in that it was one of the first in the country to really integrate students with more "visible" disabilities with the other students... but its blind spot was helping students like me, who were precocious on many counts, but whose challenges made every day so, so hard. The biggest issue for me was needing somewhere to hide when I was upset, because, due to my emotional dysregulation, when I was upset I cried, and as any 4th grader knows, crying in front of other peers is mortifying. So we asked the school, "Can't Sarah have a small, safe, nearby space away from the other students to calm down and regain her composure?", and after some wheedling, their reluctant response was to offer me a calm-down room.... at the other end of the building. I'll readily admit that I wasn't the easiest child to teach, but that stigma was one of the big reasons I was homeschooled from middle to highschool, and also the reason why I was denied acceptance- to an alternative highschool- the one time I did consider going back to public school.