Just to add: does anybody want anything? Is very much a genuine question. But you should only ask for things that wont inconvenience the person, and always try to give them the money for the thing you asked for (they may refuse, and you dont have to keep insisting) So if i say im popping out to greggs for lunch, does anyone want anything? It would be reasonable to ask me to pick you up a sausage roll as greggs sell those. It would not be reasonable to ask me to stop by McDonalds on the way and get you a burger.
Yeah it tends to mean 'do a couple of people want a couple of small things while I'm there?' It is a genuinely sincere offer, but it doesn't mean the entire office should jump onto that offer and it doesn't mean you're doing a full-on lunch run.
Heard a joke once, but punchline phrase is standard Scottish. A professor of language lecturing students in Glasgow pointed out that in some languages a double negative in a sentence meant a stressed negative (that is not NOT real), in others it meant a positive (that is not unreal), but you could never get a double positive to mean a negative. 'Yeah, right' shouted one of his students.
Geordie and both mean make sure it's open. I *might* go and look then come back and say nothing, then relay the information if asked (usually in exasperation).
'When you get a minute' DOES NOT mean 'do this now'. If someone has asked you to do something, it is important to them and they want to see it done but they also want to show respec to your time and work by recognising that you might have something more urgent to work on. Show repect in turn by managing your time to fit it in.
I agree with both these examples. If anyone meant anything different, as per the examples in the video, I'd think them rude. In our staff room, we often offer to get things for our colleagues when going down to the coffee shop on the ground floor of the college, or when popping out to the shop at lunchtime. And we mean it! It's common courtesy.
Yup, you perhaps don't know how important other stuff they're working on is, plus someone can finish what they are working on, "when you get a minute" doesn't mean "now", but if you're asking someone to do something, it probably needs doing in a reasonable timescale. If it was low priority, you'd say "it's a low priority, by Friday is fine", if someone doesn't give a timescale, assume -today-. If you can't fit the work in today, tell them. Tell them tell them tell them tell them. This is the biggest frustration, people accepting work you're sharing because you're really struggling with deadlines, and then it not being done and then having to do it yourself at 1am. Arrrrgh 😢 But you should always ask how busy someone is and when they should be able to do it by... And they should give a proper answer and update you if things change. I'm realising I've possibly been let down a couple too many times 😂
A lot of this sort of thing is due to the desire to not appear rude. We don't want to actually call out a boss/coworker as an incompetent idiot, we just want to heavily imply it.
There are regional differences though. In places like Yorkshire, Birmingham, Manchester and Liverpool people tend to prefer direct communication a lot more, and get a bit annoyed if you try the southern indirect type of talking too much.
@@ajs41 Not so much Liverpool or Manchester, we also have context-based communication. And even the stereotype of the 'straight-talking Yorkshireman' isn't entirely accurate.
I have a counterexample to American directness. The context was a rafting trip with a group of Brits, in which the guide was American, and we came to a stretch of river that required us to paddle really hard. We were giving it everything, and the guide called out "That's good!", and we thought she was pleased with us so we kept paddling like crazy. A few seconds later she called again "I said that's good!" We carried on, until finally she yelled "Stop!" at which point we stopped. She asked "Why did you keep paddling when I said 'That's good'?" Apparently in American that means something like "you've done enough so you can stop", which was far from obvious to us. It seems that not everything in American communication is as direct as you might think!
So true, if someone is serving you food you say "I'm good," when you want them to stop. Americans are so expecting to hearing this phrase they might just keep going if you say, "that's enough, thanks." It's obvious after you've heard it the first time.
I don't think this is an example of communication style (as covered by the video), but rather an example of a word or phrase having varying meanings or implications across dialects
In the US we have an annual physical exam which is commonly fully covered by medical insurance and you don't owe anything on this one. However, I've learned the hard way that the moment you say: Oh by the way... Many clinics have a policy to treat that visit as a problem visit, so mf-ers charged the insurance for 2 visits and I had to pay $50 copay 😢
@@ChimpingBulldog Many people don't realise that the GPs they are seeing now, work for an independent company who contracts to the NHS. People paying privately won't just suddenly make more GPs appear from nowhere, they will be the same people.
UK born and raised here. I immediately thought of Yes Minister the TV series: "Brave decision Minister" which of course caused the Minister to go into paroxysms of worry that it was an extremely bad decision.
@@repr0bate1 Some might have finally gotten their heads around it after a challenge of 30+ years to figure it out😉.They might find Rick Mayall's ( RIP & what a Giant of Comedy ) "The New Statesman " - easier to follow - and laugh at.
Had a mate at university, somewhat older than us, who described everything from absolute perfection to an utter clusterfuck as "marvellous" - it was all in the pitch and spin, you knew exactly what he meant.
As a Brit, I have to agree. When people use superlatives about everything, it devalues the praise and makes it difficult to be convincing when you want to praise something strongly. That isn't a problem we Brits have . . . !
Being a Brit that worked for US companies for over 20 years, I can tell you, your video is absolutely brilliant. You should start a corporate British / American communication company. You do not come over to the UK and in front of all her employees, tell them that their female MD , here, is full of spunk.
In the same boat here re working for Americans for a couple of decades. I'd sometimes spend an hour with my American boss quietly translating English English into American English so he'd understand what what my British colleagues had just said in a meeting. By the end of his time in the UK he'd say "that's interesting" to the bloke who'd just presented the dumbest idea in Christendom, and our eyes would meet across the conference table....
My (northern English) husband taught me (southern English) to understand his mother. When i asked her if she wanted something, if she said "i don't mind" this was an enthusiastic yes. If she said "I'm not bothered" that meant she *really* didn't want it.
im from Manchester, my Dearly beloved was raised in Doncaster.. in our early days I asked if she wanted to go to the cinema, she replied "I'm not bothered," so i offered to buy the tickets. She was perplexed saying "but I said Im not bothered" in Manchester that means " I have not real opinion, happy either way" in Doncaster it means " i do not want to do this"
A guy from the Deep South(ern US) once told me that where he came from, "I don't mind" means that the person *does* mind--in other words (my best attempt to explain the logic), "don't mind" seems to mean, "I wouldn't contemplate it."
@@greghamann2099 I have heard „blunt, harsh, rude“ from Americans who live here. But I‘m glad to hear that there are others that do understand our ways. 🙏🏻😃
Learning German I had to learn how to say things imperatively, when of course, I had almost never done that. You would always start with "It would be nice if..." etc.
I once read of businesses from mainly English speaking countries like UK, US, Canada, Australia sending their executives to a "Learn to Speak English" course. We English speakers especially Canada, US, Australia and maybe the UK too use many metaphors, sayings, slang in everyday speech. We are so used to it. A German or person not used to English may struggle with some of the sayings we use all the time.
Following a fire at the welding/fabrication shop I was working at at the time - a hydraulic pack had sparked off &, despite us emptying six fire extinguishers on it, was cheerfully consuming several million pounds worth of equipment not to mention severely damaging the building - & all we could do was stand at a safe distance & wait for the Fire Brigade - my manager turned to me & said "That's a bit unfortunate, isn't it?" To which I replied "Yeah - I think we are going to have a little bit of trouble getting this weeks orders out." An American listening in would probably think we were experiencing a minor inconvenience rather than watching half the business go up in flames.
It’s like the message a British pilot said over the intercom to his passengers when all four engines had stopped working and he called it a “little inconvenience”.
@@molybdomancer195 That was Capt. Eric Moody who sadly died recently, after his Jumbo Jet, a Boeing 747, ran into an invisible (at night) cloud of volcanic ash over Indonesia: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress." A masterpiece of understatement. Oh, and they did of course get them going again... eventually!
Yeah... but no. As far as I know I'm not on any "spectrum" but I just want a plain simple instruction. "Can you check if the windows are open, and if they are, please close them."
I have Asperger's, too. I am English. I am 43. I have such dry humour and a neutral speech tone that the only way people can tell when I'm joking is if I smile. I've had to fight people in the past because I said something I thought was an obvious joke, but it was taken personally. It is very rare that I take anything seriously, but I only laugh in my head (is that an Asperger's 'thing?) so most people can't tell whether I'm joking or not without that smile. I was in my mid 20s before anyone told me that I don't laugh like normal people. I hadn't realised the disconnect between my brain and my body.
That's very true I never thought of that subtle difference in the way we speak. I probably would have just asked them to clarify if it was meant to be open or closed before going up 😂
Your last point about the statement - ‘when you get a minute’ doesn’t mean do it now, it means that I don’t know what you are currently doing, or how important that is, so can you do what I am asking as soon as you can!
It can mean two things: said unsarcastically, it means "do it when you're ready". But it can also be said sarcastically, meaning "you really ought to have done it by now, so you'd better do it as quickly as possible!"
We Brits are masters of sarcasm, banter, and not saying what you mean. Unless someone from another country is VERY aware of this, i can imagine how difficult it would be to get to grips with it 😂😂
Its very much how you say it and the face that says it. We could say something is interesting and mean it or say it sarcastically but the former would probably have an immediate follow up with more questions
@@KaiHenningsen Ha! Very clever! You've struck just the right balance so we don't know if you mean it, or have been quietly taking the piss out of us all these years. You're not Henning Wehn are you?
Your window example made your point perfectly, as it never occurred to me that someone would look to see if the window was open but not close it in response to that statement. It made me realise how I take understanding of the hidden meaning for granted.
I've had issues when describing someone as being a lovely person. To an American, I am describing what they look like but to us British, it usually means they have a pleasant character. They can be as ugly as sin but still be a lovely person.
The 'Im just popping out for Lunch, does anyone want anything?' Isnt a hard and fast I dont want peoples orders, they will often be quite happy to get one or two items like a chocolate bar or a can of drink for one or two people. They just dont want ten people giving them a full lunch order.
Yeah I though exactly this. I would never ask if someone wants something if I didn't mean it, just us Brits know to not go overboard if taking advantage of the offer, that's bad manners.
My answer to this question would be “can you get me half a hundred weight of potatoes (that’s 56 lbs) and a nice cauliflower please”. This would be met with a bemused ‘are you serious’ look. 😂
@@sroberts605 Nope, nothing to do with north versus south - I work in London and anybody asking if anyone wants anything would mean it in my workplaces.
I think there really is a bit of a North/South divide thing: when I worked in London the couple of other Northerners in the office would take me up on the offer to pick up anything while I was out from day one, but it took the Londoners more time to realise I really meant it. It got to a point where I had to specify "I'm only going to the sandwich shop across the road, does anyone want anything from there?" unless I wanted to spend most of my lunch hour chasing down everyone's orders. But I was brought up to always do stuff like politely make the offer, it's only now I'm typing this that I'm realising I didn't have to do it at all, most people never even offered. (It's also now occurring to me that later on, in a different job, I probably didn't need to make up to nine other people tea or coffee every morning just because I wanted a cuppa. But where I'm from that's just what you do; if you're the one who's making tea you offer because it would be unconscionably unfriendly not to do so. I think it just goes hand in hand with the way we're usually automatically pretty hospitable in the far North of England too, I'm always apologetic if I can't offer a guest something relatively substantial to eat, even if they spring a surprise visit on me! ("Here's your coffee, I'm really sorry, but I've not been to the shops yet this week and I've only got biscuits." - with a guilty feeling that I should probably have at least made sandwiches). Pretty much everyone I know round here is similar, so I guess that's just a cultural thing?)
I used to work as a cross cultural coach and some of my clients were Americans dealing with British colleagues (and v.v). Indirectness of communication is a well known feature of British culture - or to be more precise, southern English - much less so in Northern England and Scotland where forthrightness/directness is more common. Because a lot of my work was about cross cultural communication in business, I collected examples of misunderstandings and used them in future training/coaching sessions. One of my favourites was: English Project Director in team meeting, to team leader: “I wonder if you’d like to get your team to have another look at the content of the client presentation? Then tomorrow we can have a chat about our strategy for the meeting”. What British team heard : “You screwed up, the presentation is awful, but there’s time to recover the situation if you and your team get on it right now and revise it. Bring it to me tomorrow so I can check it’s good to go.” American team leader heard: “No big deal, a few minor alterations required, boss is just a bit nervous because it’s a big client.”
@ajs41 this may be why i struggle in the midlands as a southerner 😂 my partner takes things really literally as he is from here and im always like YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT... turns out he doesnt always know what i meant 😂
This is so true. Brit with an American boss. I have a reverse example. My boss praised my honesty. I asked if that meant I complained a lot or had a brutal communication style. She literally meant she knew I would tell her my truthful opinion!
@@alanstrang277 Yes! A manager a few years ago told me he loved my honesty while laughing and wincing as he read an email I'd cc'ed him in to. I later realised he meant "Ouch, that was rather impolitic". But it needed saying, so I chose to carry on taking him to mean he loved my honesty. Ironic really 😎
If a Brit says “wonderful” or “fantastic”, “tremendous” “brilliant” etc BUT with a falling tone of voice…it is sarcasm and means the exact opposite of that word. A rising tone means take it literally, I am happy.
I'm a Brit (Geordie) living in the northeastern US, and I find praise/criticism is one area where Americans are not literal at all. Where a Geordie might often say, "That's a **** stupid idea!", in the US most will want to avoid giving offence (offense!) and will say, "That's awesome!" If the American says it with genuine enthusiasm, they like the idea, but if the tone is different it means they think it's a stupid idea, or mediocre. (This is why everything here in the US is "awesome" or "amazing"!). I worked with a lot of working class Geordies, and they can use devastating wit and subtlety when they choose, but also be brutally direct at other times.
Funny thing I heard an American saying they tried to order food in some European countries and when they asked "can I get a coffee" (meaning I'd like a coffee) and got the straightforward reply that they can, it just left them confused why they weren't being given a coffee (as the employee didn't get a direct request for coffee). So it seems that the US does use some hidden meaning (that would be understood in the UK, but maybe other non-English countries don't understand it since it's a second language to you). Strangely, I found a lot of these aren't how I'm used to in the UK. Perhaps there's a bit of a regional divide. For example, when my boss asks me to do something when I have a minute, he actually means that. He means "You're busy with more important tasks but this needs doing once those higher priorities are done" But I do agree with some of those where we understate our feelings of disappointment or excitement. I'm not sure if it's sarcasm, humility or what, but we definitely don't like to go to extremes of praise or criticism
I like "Is that the time?". This can variously mean "I'm fed up with talking to you", "Don't you have somewhere else to be?" or "Why don't you just bugger off?"
I also think that culturally it is not so much about hidden meanings as politeness. In the UK "Are you making a coffee?" Is not even a request for coffee, but it can be a fishing expedition to see if the other person would offer one. The other person will feel bad if they have a reason not to make two and feel obliged. It allows the other person to make the offer. We also have the option to change our minds and move ahead and ask if they will make us one if they don't offer.. "Would you mind making me one if you're there?" Longer worded requests or two or more part requests are more polite in english because it is a way to show the other person you know it is a nusiance. The more trouble you put someone to, the bigger the favour, the longer the question or the longer the exchange.. "I'm so sorry and I don't want to be a nuisance but if it's not too much trouble would you mind... " Indirectness has a similar effect. In the Netherlands, it's the opposite, it can be rude not to be direct.. so the level of directness comes from a place of sensitivity to others and good manners.
Your observations are very astute, and in my opinion, the British indirectness reflects a desire to communicate, but not risk offending or embarrassing. As you say, it is just the way we are. I had similar issues when working in Germany and caused much confusion among German collegues when using sarcasm, understatement or a mild attempt at humour. Later, when my German has improved and I would use the same expressions but now in German, the 'confusion' was replaced by a lecture on what nonsence I was talking. Idioms do not work well outside their own habitat!
Brilliant explanation - and I mean it, despite being a Brit! I was once trying to find the “rest room” in an American hotel but couldn’t and had to go back to the concierge for more help. I began with “You must think I’m really stupid…” and back came the reply “Oh no sir, I don’t think you’re stupid at all!”
As I overheard an English professor of chemistry say to a (post)graduate student: well, it's just a suggestion....but you might like to bear in mind who's making it". And then he left the lab and went back to his office.
Irish here, living abroad. We use so much tonality as well. Rely heavily on sarcasm. ‘Isn’t this just lovely?’ Is a good example - can be face value but context matters. 2hr plane delay ‘well, isn’t that just lovely?’ Trending towards the negative side would be ‘well, that’s just wonderful’ - means ‘jesus Christ this is a disaster’. I work in a multicultural European environment and in my particular office work on humour based methods. Non-native English speaking Colleagues have adopted this. Gallows humour. On my side I’ll put extra emphasis on tone, exaggerating it to make my meaning clear, and I also communicate more directly. A recent change in the makeup of colleagues in terms of nationalities has meant I’ve had to use language which I consider rude to an extent ‘it’s your job to ensure that this is done’ - that’s so hard for me to say as in a British or Irish work environment that would be one of the harshest criticisms that could be given. But in my case now, it’s simply that new colleagues don’t know who is supposed to do what and to avoid me having to do their job, I have to be super direct. It’s painful for me
I'm also Irish and I agree. Having to be so direct feels rude and entitled. To use the original anecdote "go close the window" would feel so bossy and entitled to say to someone. The subtext would be "I'm a bad person"
There's an apocryphal story dating back to WW2 when a US armoured column advanced ahead of a British infantry brigade. A wooded hillside was possibly thought to contain German troops. The British CO asked of the US CO 'Have you cleared the woods yet ? To which the American answered 'Yes'. The British infantry advanced and immediately started taking fire from enemy positions on the hill. Of course... by 'cleared' the Americans understood that they had got safely past the possible enemy positions and reached safe ground. The British on the other hand understood that the Americans had 'cleared' (neutralised) all enemy troops from that hillside, and that it was now safe to proceed.
See also the Battle of Imjin River in Korea, where the British Brigadier reported the situation of his 650 men, surrounded by 10,000 Chinese, as "pretty sticky" to his American commander. The intended message did not get through. Not a bad video, incidentally.
@@simong9067 If I remember rightly the British troops had also run out of ammunition too, and the US General didn't get that the statement was a cry for help.
@@AndoCommando1000 according to the story the US Commander was asked if they had cleared the woods with no discussion of combatant removal. It should have been cleared out. Linguistic shortcuts are very common but often lead to confusion.
The joy of British understatement. The phase ‘that could have gone better’ can mean that whatever you are doing has encountered some minor issues along the way, or that you have made a complete pigs ear of whatever you were trying to do. As for the ‘we should meet up sometime’ it just far more polite than telling some one you’d be happy to never see them again.
It me "that could have gone better" means that was so badly, it's a wonder no-one ended in hospital, sued or fired, or possibly all three. It's not something you want to hear,
"That could have gone better..." is only half of the complete phrase. The second half isn't commonly spoken as a brit hearing it automatically completes it in their head - "...because it certainly couldn't have gone any worse."
If you really would like to meet them again, you have to be far more specific: "D'you fancy meeting for a drink tomorrow evening?" or "How about lunch next Tuesday?" is a clear message that you actually want to do it.
A difference between US and UK that I've noticed is that people from the US will say something like "I'm a great tennis player, or, yes, I played amazing tennis today." To the majority of people in the UK this would be considered arrogant bragging and you'd be laughed at for your lack of humility. A Brit would be less direct and downplay their skill: "Yeah, I'm not bad at tennis, I do enjoy it and I'm happy with how I played today."
If you ask a Brit how his tennis match went, a typical response of "it was a good game" will tell you he won. "My opponent played well" probably means he lost.
I’m an American (a mostly life-long New Yorker, if that’s ok) and if someone said to me “Hey, can you check if the upstairs window is open?” I would ABSOLUTELY assume I should IMMEDIATELY close the window to preclude problems that might arise while we were out, whether rain or gust of wind or whatever. Of course, this American/New Yorker was raised by very Irish parents, so the possibility of rain is always looming in the brain. (Maybe a native Californian should be forgiven in this situation, whether high or low context?)
I think I would assume that they wanted the window open: 'check if the window is open' = 'the window should be open, so check and see that it is, and if not, then open it'.
@@sisterrosetta57 Sometimes it helps to cool a building down by opening that top window of the skylight. So in the morning that office that faced the sun wouldn't be too hot, especially in Summer . And it would let in fresh air to an office room made stale by people & their work gadgets. ( Of course this isn't taking into account any perceived Security Risks and any risk of raindrops coming in. " Horses for Courses" eh?
I worked on a chemical plant in the US (Alabama). The company was British owned, workforce American, commissioning engineers British. The section of the plant I was commissioning could theoretically 'exotherm' (explode) & great care had been taken in the design to eliminate the risk & everybody was aware of the problem. On the day of start up things were going slowly & I was bored, so over the intercom received by all I announced " All's fine, no exotherm yet". A typical British remark to make light of a serious situation, & as the plant wasn't a smoking ruin all was OK. The US manager went ballistic, I was never to mention the E word again unless it actually happened- somewhat lacking in sang-froid, I thought.
@charlesbrecknell4656 The manager was perfectly right. Any intercom message could be misheard, or only partially heard, so that 'exotherm' might be the only word heard, or recognised. This is about the limits of sound transmission, not culture.
Good point. When I was in the RAF we were told that if you got a ride in a fast jet then the pilot would never say the word "eject" unless it is time to bail out. He would say things like "we may have to abandon the aircraft" or words to that effect. If you heard him say "eject eject eject" you were meant to go on the first ej...
@@tomblack8211 Pilots and air traffic controllers also do this. The only time they use the word "takeoff" is when they are giving clearance for a plane to throttle up its engines and start accelerating down the runway. Any other time it's referred to as "departure", because you REALLY don't want someone to mistakenly think they're allowed to take off and go barelling down the runway as someone else is occupying it
I (a Brit) worked for a US company that had "thermal events" rather than e.g. "the car spontaneously caught fire, burned through the handbrake cable, rolled into another car and caused that car to catch fire too".
@@thiloreichelt4199 I'm so sorry: I should have been more literal, and written something like this: "Since you like self-referencing jokes, here's another one: Is it ignorance or is it apathy? I don't know and I don't care."
This is really true with use of swear words where context is everything. If you are in the pub and someone says "Oi, you xxxxer" it can mean the opposite depending on delivery- someone is picking a fight and you should get out, or an old and dear friend is about to buy you a pint.
Many Australians nearly always use expletives at some point in almost every conversation. A good friend you havent seen for several months will be greeted as "hey Bill, you [C U Next Tuesday]! " Someone you despise might be greeted with exactly the same words, just different body language or tone of voice. Very confusing for visitors to the country!
@@afpwebworks I watched an Australian dashcam video programme, and was appalled at the language: in one clip the driver went a whole 20 seconds without once saying "F***!"
My first time ever hearing the phrase "you're all set" was when booking into a hotel in Long Island, New York. I just stood there, not understanding what she meant. She repeated it, then I asked, confused, because she didn't seem to be doing anything, if there was anything else she needed... to which she answered, "no, you're all set" and I think that's when the penny finally dropped!
Brilliant analysis! I'm a 77 yr old Brit, married to a Canadian and living in the US and even at my age this clarified so much that has baffled me in communicating with Americans. My Grandmother was from Lancashire and was as blunt as can be, and always said what she meant - so regional differences don't help in understanding either!
I remember seeing the films ‘Midway’ and ‘1917’ fairly close together, in Midway, the Americans had to big each other and themselves up, shouting about how great they all are. In 1917, the two British soldiers sent on a dangerous mission just quietly get on with it, without any histrionics. I know which approach I prefer.
You see exactly the same thing in videos from Afghanistan and Iraq. The US are all "hoo-ya, whoooo, that's what I'm talking about" and nearby Brits are just looking at them and thinking "pillocks"
@@Kyrelel When ISAF were searching the Tora Bora hills for Bin Laden and ran into some heavy resistance based around a fortified cave system, the resulting battles led to the Americans calling the area the 'Caves of Death' and the Brits nicknaming it 'Tora Bora Tomkinson'. I expect a few well-worn pin-up posters were eventually left there.
Thats pretty clear from how you've written about them. Then again, if you are from Britain that is what you are used to - it is normal. I know lots of Brits who have travelled to the US and find it funny when the plane reaches the east coast and the Americans on the flight whoop and cheer.
I noticed who you mentioned 1917 ... which coincidentally was the end of the war when the Americans finally decided to turn up when all the hard work was already done.
It rains a lot in the UK and so you don't want to leave a window open, so if you are asked to check if a window is open then it is understood that if it is open, you would close it.
I work for the EMEA region and see this a lot. I work with a lot of Germans and Dutch where directness is appreciated but as a Brit, we are well versed in reading between the lines, picking up on alternate meanings despite what is actually being said. My favorite examples of the low context/high context scale is with the Finnish. They are even more sarcastic than the Brits and a lot less emotional. If a Finn says "the project went OK" then a Brit will think it wasn't that good, an American will think it was good but a Finn will think wow, OK. That project was a massive success 🙂
In my experience, Finnish people do not catch on suddle sarcasm signs so our alternative is very dramatic so people in the room get the hint. Usually older people do not understand sarcasm at all. 😂
I had two duvets on the chair, one dark pattern the other light pattern I asked my colleague to pass me the light one. He picked both of them up and said " I don't know which one is light they feel about the same".
Yes, I remember a whimsical drama from the 70s. Someone was reading the diary of an antarctic adventurer, ' 12 miles from South Pole. A bit parky'. For non Brits, 'parky' means cold. I don't know why.
I heard an American producer talk about his experience working with Aardman animations on the film Chicken Run. Nick Park and Co said they understood the notes given to them, and thought they were good ideas ... The producer came back to find they'd ignored his notes and did the opposite.
Fascinating!! I studied a little bit about Japanese communication in a business class once, so interesting and I'm a geek for learning about cultural things like this!
of course - the underlying context being ‘they were “good ideas” ‘ but not quite good enough to be utilised (like saying ‘interesting’ instead of ‘meh’)
Now I'm wondering: if a British person wishes to express, literally, that someone else's ideas or contributions are good and/or interesting, how do they do it? That is, if "That's interesting" => "That's terrible", solve for X: X => "That's interesting".
Probably the best example - If you meet a Scot in rough pub in Glasgow and he calls you 'old pal' it does NOT mean he thinks you are an endearing long-term friend!!
"Im just popping out for lunch, does anybody want anything?" means, round our bit " I will get the first person who replies one thing and the rest of you know not to ask.
In Oz, my mother in law did not do well on a govt dementia assessment where shown a document and asked, "Can you read this out loud?" replied "Yes, of course".
@@MarisaPaola-um5ybI have this 'caught in the middle' situation with my British husband quite regularly. He feels I go overboard when I check on things or explain things, but I'm well aware of how easily things can be totally misunderstood. He finds this condescending or controlling, but heaven help me if there's a misunderstanding because either way, I'm always at fault. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. 😢
was just about to say, this is pretty much exactly how the conversation would go - we often follow up with a question of confirmation of assumed intent according to context - think some people are acting like we're telepathic
Big one I had to get used to when working with Americans is when I great people normally, in the UK, I say "you alright?" Or "how's it going?" I was shocked yo find my American colleagues actually would give me an earnest answer and tell me how they were feeling. Took me a bit to realise that they just genuinely thought I was asking 😅 and they weren't oversharing, I literally asked. Obviously in the UK "you alrigh" or "how's it going?" "How's life keeping you?" "How do you do?" All just mean "hello" and the response a brit will expect it something along the lines of "I'm good, thanks, you?" Irregardless if you are actually ok. And I'd follow up with a "yeah I'm good" or something similar. If I am genuinely struggling and need to inform someone I'm not ok I would say "as good as can be expected" This would then garner a response from a brit genuinely asking. "Is everything OK?" Or "Oh dear, what's happened?" We are a funny lot
Brit living in Germany here: no matter how hard I try I can't shake the habit of greeting people by saying "y'alright?" or "how ya doing?" or something along these lines. Had a lot of German baristas and shop workers look at me especially confused when I walk in and ask them "wie geht's?" before giving my order. Seems it doesn't exactly translate culturally 😅😅
Actually, there's a more extreme version recently arrived in Britain, of "y'a'righ" (it's always pronounced like this). It's when something has happened to you in public/you have asked for help/you look like you might become a burden to the person saying it, who is walking on. It means "I am not going to help you, now get outta my face". You hear it quite often now when everyone and everything is mistrusted.
I forgot to say, "y'a'righ" is not a question about your health: it's a second stage contraction of "Na, y'a'righ" which means a blank No, as in "I wouldn't touch it with a bargepole, go away"... (You hear this everywhere.)
We also use Indirect communication to be polite and not order you about, even if you are a subordinate. Think about your examples and see if the person was just simply trying to avoid ‘telling you what to do’ e.g. ‘can you check if the window is open’ (because it needs to be closed before we can go) vs ‘Go upstairs, close the window and report back to me’.
@@IsleofskyeIt's used in the Courts of the British Legal Systems quite frequently, too, along with referring to other barrister(s) as " My Learned Friend(s)".
If your on a train in the UK and a sweet little old lady (yes, maybe me) asks you quietly and politely if the seat next to you, the one with your bag on it, "is taken?" move your bag immediately! You are in imminent danger!
Be on the tube when a group of American teenagers get on and one very pretty girl says 'He called you, what was it? A 'Wanker? I wonder what it means? Trouble is after you get up off the floor , you have to explain. 🤣
British understatement, irony and sarcasm do not travel well. I was involved in designing an emergency radio system for the Dutch government. During a conversation with the Dutch representative, it was humorously suggested that as well as being used by the police, fire and ambulance services, the system might also find an application with the Dutch mountain rescue service. To which came the very serious reply "We have no mountains in Holland."
Interesting because I thought the Dutch themselves always call it the Netherlands and get quite irritated with people calling it Holland when referring to the entire country.
@@ryanmitcham5522 their choice of words not mine. It was the 1970s and the representatives may have been concerned with a region of the whole system. The radio system in question was deployed very successfully and operated for a number of years until replaced by a more modern digital alternative.
Swear words and obscenities in British English is something that scared the s+++ out my American friends at College. We use these words in every day conversations, but to the Americans it was rude and scary at times.
Some 20 years ago, buses in the Metropolitan Washington Area carried large ads for the Austin Powers movie "The Spy Who Sh***** Me"". That word was absolutely fine in the USA, but it would not have been acceptable in London (or, now, on RUclips).
Yes, it really depends. There's always a risk of overgeneralising. Maybe on average Brits are freer with swearwords, but it's far from unknown to come across an American who swears casually and profusely. I've never heard my mum (working class Brit) say anything stronger than "sod" (nor did her parents, while alive, at least not in my presence), although I expect "sod" sounds ruder to her generation than it does to mine.
No, you were right about the window. I'm British and it wasn't clear what was wanted; security against burglars, or good ventilation against damp. It's not obvious. However, 'That's interesting' usually translates to 'Have you lost your fucking mind?'.
To me there's a difference in wording depending if you want security or ventilation. "Can you check if the window's open?" implies you want it shut. "Can you check that the window's open?" implies you want it open.
The example you gave at first with the window is funny to me. Having lived in the UK my whole life, I immediately understood it, but it also took me a few seconds to realise where your particular story was going. Then I went "Oooh."
Brit here. This made me giggle. The classic British understatement is a cultural thing as is sarcasm/irony "a bit of a problem" may well mean a disaster or emergency but context tone and body language is important. "Interesting idea" could mean interesting but could mean stupid or risky. My British husband is pretty literal and would not have understood he was supposed to shut the window either though
Thanks for watching! I appreciate the solidarity from your British husband, at least there are a few Brits out there who would like you all to be a bit more direct as well. ;)
I'm English, and would've gone to check the window, shut it, and then come back and said "Yep, it was open" just as a silly joke, and then I'd tell e'm "that I'd closed it - was that a mistake? Should I go back and open it again?"..... sarcastic/silly humour that I love!! 😜
I was about to be quintessentially British just now and say that I often say "that's not half bad" when I actually mean "that's actually pretty decent" when I realised that "pretty decent" is an understatement in itself. I basically mean it's pretty good but I find it SO hard to directly say that lol (damn I didn't realise how ingrained in us it is to understate literally everything!) - another phrase I say a lot is "that was a tad harsh" meaning "that was actually quite rude/mean/harsh"
Only ‘quite’ rude…not very rude then?😂 in the US ‘quite’ means very. Saying actually is another context phrase too…it means ‘to be literal’ which assumes that without ‘actually’ there is still some leeway.
@@contessa.adellaah this hurts my head lol. For me "quite rude" means somewhere between very rude and a bit rude. So not extremely rude but more than just slightly rude - enough to be a bit taken aback by it but not overly shocked/upset/offended by it. Whereas, "a tad" means "just a small amount". Does that even make sense? 😂 Funnily enough, if I thought something was very rude, I'd most likely say "wow, that was quite rude"
Interesting video! I like the high/low concept idea. As a native Brit I can add that "quite good" can also mean "fantastic, brilliant and the best thing I've ever experienced in my whole life".
So to be fair to us Brits - with the window thing. The clue is that no-one is going to ask you to check something and not perform some action if the thing we have asked you to check is obviously not in the state it should be in. For example if someone says "can you check I turned the heating off" or "can you check I turned the cooker off" - it's very much implied that if the object we want you to check is not in the state we wish it to be in, then you should rectify that upon confirmation. No-one will ever ask you to check if the window is open - and expect just an answer of yes it is or no it wasn't.
"Can I get..." used when ordering something in a restaurant or asking for something in a shop always sounds really odd to me. "May I have...", or, "I'd like...", make much more sense to me.
It's a truly awful new expression. If I phone a company and they want to "take me through security", they might say "can I get your date of birth (e.g.)". I say "ok, I'll hold the line then while you look it up". Or someone goes up to a counter in shop and asks for something that's behind, do they expect to go around and get it for themselves?
@@oldpigsqueal3578 "Can I get..." used when ordering something in a restaurant is a legitimate use of the phrase as you, the person ordering, does not know if they have everything on the menu 'in stock' as they might have run out of some stuff.
Understand the point but guys ...please dont analyse language word by word....new phrases come in to express something in a holistic way ....this one just is meaning ( ...an order basically ) ....its fun to talk about but of we would need ( yes tedious hehe ) computational stats to know if " Can i get " ...is supplanting other ordering phrases in Britain ...it wouldnt be a surprise given ( eg ) how prevalent " guys " is in Britain and many other Americanisms ....provoking the old fashioned in Britain to auto - ridicule themselves backlash eg on spelling ....Two last things, one, " May i have ...." sounds over fussy today and two, many people would just say " Two cokes, please " :):)
I'm autistic, too, and same. When they looked at me like I was nuts for needing clarification, I would have corrected the grammar of their first question, showing how (in literal terms) checking if the window was open and closing the window are two *completely different* things.
One aspect I think you may have overlooked is the question of politeness. The British indirectness is often a way of sparing someone's feelings. "It's mostly OK, but there are some improvements needed" is more gentle than "This is an unacceptably low standard piece of work. Please start again." Also keeping the low key remarks for the every day keeps the severe comments in reserve. If you've already said "This is absolutely great" for something that was just about acceptable, where do you go to for a truly outstanding accomplishment?
"super excited"? Although, I work with Americans and they always seem to introduce themselves as being "super excited" before you even get started. Surely it can only go down from there.
Some of the context is to navigate how reasonable it is to ask something. It allows a little flexibility. If you give people an order, that may not always be appropriate. A slightly indirect style lets context fill in the gaps and is forgiving if people have slightly different assessments of the situation. To fill in all those permutations with direct communication would take a lot more words.
As a brit I would usually interpret "quite good" to mean "greatly exceeded my expectations". Eg: "the film was actually quite good" = I wasn't expecting much but I really enjoyed it. "This meal is really quite good" = this may actually be the best thing I have ever eaten.
In Yorkshire, " That'll do ". ( IE "That will do " ) ....ie " That will suffice " - actually means , " Yes! That's very good ! " . In Lancashire, " Be reet" ( ie "That will be fine" / " That's okay " ) means " It's tolerable "
There is a famous incident during the Korean War - Battle of the Imjin River. After two days' fighting, an American, Major General Robert H. Soule, asked the British brigadier, Thomas Brodie: "How are the Glosters doing?" (The Gloucestershire Regiment), The brigadier, with English understatement, replied: "A bit sticky, things are pretty sticky down there." To American ears, this did not sound desperate, he understood this to mean ‘We’re having a bit of rough and tumble but we’re holding the line’. Oh good, the general decided, no need to reinforce or withdraw them, not yet anyway.” But Brodie meant they were in serious trouble. “His men were outnumbered eight to one, stranded on every side by human waves of…attackers…. After the battle more than 500 British soldiers had been captured ( and spent the rest of the war in a North Korean POW camp) , 59 were killed or missing. Only 39 escaped back to UN lines.
The Gloucesters still held line, while the yanks withdrew. I know this because a Korean village till this day celebrate and honour the British Gloucesters as they call them for saving them. An elderly Korean gentleman told the story.
This is a bad anecdote In matters of life and death, in the battlefield, or any action, even in a factory or construction site, a figure of speech is never used by anyone.
@@thiloreichelt4199, the point is it’s not a subtle hint at all to a Brit - it’s immediately evident that things are very bad and immediate assistance is required.
I’m British, but I’ve travelled a lot and I’m rather literal-minded, so I don’t know where I’d place on your spectrum! However, if I’d been in your position and asked to check on the window, I’d have found the request rather unclear, so I’d have asked before going up the first time, “Would you like it open or closed?”. It’s unlikely that anyone would send me up just to report on the window status, without doing anything about it if it was wrong.
Really insightful and fascinating video - I'd often wondered whether the more literal way of speaking in the States was to do with the pioneering spirit or whether it was more about integrating many cultures. BTW I'm a Brit but I must confess that I too would have checked to make sure that the window was open!! However if they'd said 'can you check if the upstairs window has been left open' then I'd have closed it.
“With respect…” Some of my favourite insults start with those two words. See also: “I’m not being funny but…” which is English for “It most definitely isn’t funny. This annoys me greatly” So widespread is it’s use, that often the sentence doesn’t even need completing, you both know what’s coming. Could be anything from ‘Wow did he actually look in a mirror before he left home. Look at the state of that’ to ‘How f**king long is this queue?’ And a million other, unsaid but obvious things in between. Your channel is great, sad that you get nothing for reaction videos of your videos, but that’s how I found you. Oh well, I’m here now. Keep doing what you’re doing. A Brit 🇬🇧
I've never heard someone saying "I'm just going out for some food (or whatever) , does anybody want anything?" and not mean it. If they're going to the effort of asking, they asking if you want them to get something for you. And yes, I'm British, and have worked in many parts of the country, though I haven't done so for the past 20+ years.
@@miaschu8175 Yup. The last time I was working in the UK, if someone was making coffee and/or tea, they made it for EVERYONE. Even workers who drank neither would do so. It's called being part of a team.
Thanks for those observations Kalyn. That explains a lot regarding the frustration I sometimes feel when dealing with Americans. I think the secret to good communication is to know when to be subtle and when to be direct. It very much depends on context. One fallout from having to be always direct is the inability to grasp irony, something the Americans and Germans are often accused of. I enjoy your observations and comments. Keep it up.
Many years ago, I worked for a British software company. If a customer called with a problem caused by a software fault, we would say something like. "That's a bug. Here is a workaround." The company did some sort of merger with a US one and we started to get messages from the top saying NEVER to say bug and giving someone a workaround was insulting! I suspect this was because the US partner was very fixated on lawyers and high self esteem. Someone had to invent the phrase "undocumented feature" to allow us to explain things and it needed odd phrasing to explain a workaround. Our default words were much more direct than the US ones.
That's strange. I live in California & "bug" & "workaround" are commonly used & not problematic at all. (Other than maybe someone being unhappy that they have to use a workaround, instead of getting the problem fixed.)
@miriamrobarts I imagine it depends on when he worked there, they type of customers they had, personal users or businesses, and similar to the first one, how computer savvy someone was.
@@miriamrobarts I believe it was to do with lawyers - a famous feature of your society! "bug" means a fault that we have not instantly fixed. Banning "workaround" is less clear to me but we suspected it was something to do with liability.
@@hesky10 Thgis would have been about 30 years ago.. It made professional level accounting software - for accountants, payrolls, warehouses etc. They never had a problem with those words until they opened sales in the USA. I suspect it had something to your central national profession of lawyers.
Have been in software support for 7 years across 2 companies, neither liked to use bug for customer facing purposes because it implied the product was faulty
'British' language is full of short cuts & inferred meaning. I will say "are you okay?" not necessarily expectating a full run-down on why you're not! In fact, it's really a greeting, more than anything. I think a lot is based on not wanting to offend, seem too direct, or too intrusive. But, you are concerned enough to ask, or want to be friendly.
A classic misunderstanding between the US and the UK came in the Korean War, when a British force was attacked by the Chinese. The Brits reported to the US “things are a bit sticky”. The Americans thought this meant things were tough but ok whereas the Brits meant it was going to hell and needed help asap.
Important to know that this is not understatement. Anyone steeped in privately-schooled British culture knows that 'a bit sticky' means 'we are preparing to die'. It was direct communication of impending catastrophe which was sadly misunderstood.
@@GirlGoneLondonofficialIf it is any consolation, I don't think I would have assumed they wanted the window closed. Maybe they wanted to check that it had been left open for ventilation. Just as plausible.
Oh GGL, that was so spot on. I (Brit) working with visiting Americans saw this loads. Sometimes it takes so much disentangling. I'll try to keep this genuine example short. I was asked to unpack this misunderstanding: American asks a Brit driver "can we turn through that gate there?" Meaning is it permitted? Brit answer "well it's open isn't it?" American hears "are you so dumb you can't see that it's physically possible" Brit means " it's physically possible (and we're not going to let trivial little details like rules cramp our style now are we). I'd never heard this high/low context thing explained before but it is so true.
English has the verbs "can" and "may" for different meanings. Folding both into the one verb "can" makes it needlessly difficult to interpret the intended meaning.
Yes, I just discovered you over Thanksgiving.. and cannot get enough... here I am up to 3 months ago.... I LOVE LOVE LOVE this one. Oh my... thanks for the snow day so I can keep filling spare time with the videos. I really REALLY like this video.
In Florida I went to hire a jet ski at the beach. I approached the dude hiring them out with a ”hi, how are you?” We went into friendly small talk for bit and then something happened which made me realise Americans don’t have the same sense of humour: Him: “It’s been a full on day, man - glad to be seeing the end of it”. Me: “Really, what time did you start?” Him: “I opened up 10 hours ago” Me: “Oh, so you’re a part-timer then?” 😉 At this point a British dude would laugh…he got offended and angry.
@@darkmatter6714 yes, I'm an American who's lived on this side of the pond for a very long time, and I sometimes forget how much I've adjusted to slight differences in meaning of everyday words like how sorry is used. I'll try getting past someone in a crowded room by saying sorry, and receive a very earnest reply of 'oh that's OK!' 🙄 Which brings out my smart Alec impulse to say 'is it? Whew! What a relief! Which in America I usually firmly suppress.
I feel like that's a joke many Americans would make as well, so it could have been more of misunderstanding in the difference in delivery & tone than the wording, in this case. (And the guy was really tired, so being grumpy already, he took it the wrong way.)
The American comedian Reginald D Hunter tells a story of going to a party in the UK, having a pleasant chat to someone and then waking up 3 days later and realising that guy really hated him.
I think an increasing number of British people feel that that sort of thing isn't really acceptable. You shouldn't give someone the wrong impression just because you find it amusing to string them along, which is what was actually going on when people behaved in that way.
I admit even as a Brit I struggled with what I now know to be Subjunctive Commands. Example: "If you could do X ... " It actually means: "Do X" - but is wrapped up in a pseudo-polite hypothetical. Also known as B.S.
I recently came off my motorbike on a parade lap at a public event. Some of the guys came over to get the bike off me (it weighs over 260kg) upon which I said "That stings a bit." I'd just broken my collar bone.
In around 1985 I was giving one-to-one advanced-level English language instruction to a German executive at a language school in Frankfurt. I recall at one point saying, "That's not quite right." At this, his eyes lit up and he retorted, "Ah, the famous English understatement. What you mean is it was totally wrong." And he was right.
This is another example of what happens in London and the Southeast compared with the rest of the country. You will find that outside London, many people do communicate more directly. Famously, Yorkshire people have a particular reputation for being direct.
I found the same as a Scottish working class person in a London workplace with mainly middle class English people. It frustrated me sometimes that people didn't say what they meant.
As a Yorkshire woman, I was going to say this. We are known as blunt. If someone had asked me to check a window was open, and it was, I would have assumed that as it was the end of the working day, it would need to be shut and shut it. But this video explains why Americans are always shocked about things which Britons would be mildly surprised about.
In my office a supervisor will say, "Can you check if the windows are open in the training room?" and it's very clearly understood that if they are open, I'm to close them. At the end of the day, that is. At the start of the day it means, "We've got some people coming and we need to get some fresh air in the training room if the windows haven't been opened." I can understand why this might be confusing. 😕
I'd say there's a bit of a high context/low context divide between the North & South within England, as well. You might feel more at home in Yorkshire, Kalyn, where 'a spade's a spade' is seen as the way to be.
As a born and bred English woman this made me chuckle. I didnt realise until you said how the things we say arent necessarily what we mean. It just come automatically to us.
Please leave your best "what I'm saying is not what I actually mean" saying or phrase below!
Can you do this please, when you get a chance?.....Please do this NOW!!!😅😅😅😅😅
Or on a personal level.."She's got a nice personality!".....IE she is hideous looking!!!😮😮😮😮😮
I do tend to use Clarkson’s “that’s not gone well” to summarise a disaster.
With the greatest of respect... (WTF drugs have you taken, that idea is the worst!)
We might have a little bit of a situation on our hands here = our collective demise is imminent
Just to add: does anybody want anything? Is very much a genuine question. But you should only ask for things that wont inconvenience the person, and always try to give them the money for the thing you asked for (they may refuse, and you dont have to keep insisting)
So if i say im popping out to greggs for lunch, does anyone want anything? It would be reasonable to ask me to pick you up a sausage roll as greggs sell those. It would not be reasonable to ask me to stop by McDonalds on the way and get you a burger.
Yeah it tends to mean 'do a couple of people want a couple of small things while I'm there?'
It is a genuinely sincere offer, but it doesn't mean the entire office should jump onto that offer and it doesn't mean you're doing a full-on lunch run.
Heard a joke once, but punchline phrase is standard Scottish.
A professor of language lecturing students in Glasgow pointed out that in some languages a double negative in a sentence meant a stressed negative (that is not NOT real), in others it meant a positive (that is not unreal), but you could never get a double positive to mean a negative.
'Yeah, right' shouted one of his students.
Ken.....
thats great i never even thought of that being a double positive to mean a negative b4 its just so ingrained in my brain as subtle derision lol
That's not Scottish, definitely British.
Can you check if the window is open = close it
Can you check that the window is open = open it
❤ from Northeast England ❤️
Totally agree.
can you check if window's open lass , if it is shut it ! an' hurry up ! from north west !
@@raymonray5444
Aye, same here.... but lets not blame ourselves. We learned bad English and worse English.
Hey, that makes us all bilingual 😂
Geordie and both mean make sure it's open. I *might* go and look then come back and say nothing, then relay the information if asked (usually in exasperation).
Thinking about this, I've also noticed more men struggle to pick up on these high context ways of speech, and obviously anyone on the spectrum.
'When you get a minute' DOES NOT mean 'do this now'. If someone has asked you to do something, it is important to them and they want to see it done but they also want to show respec to your time and work by recognising that you might have something more urgent to work on. Show repect in turn by managing your time to fit it in.
If I asked if people want anything for lunch, I mean it. I don't want to do 10 people's sandwiches but am happy to pick up a couple of things.
I agree with both these examples. If anyone meant anything different, as per the examples in the video, I'd think them rude.
In our staff room, we often offer to get things for our colleagues when going down to the coffee shop on the ground floor of the college, or when popping out to the shop at lunchtime. And we mean it! It's common courtesy.
As an Australian, I second this.
@@emilydavison2053 Same with me. Maybe it's a London or southern thing. I'm from the Midlands.
Yup, you perhaps don't know how important other stuff they're working on is, plus someone can finish what they are working on, "when you get a minute" doesn't mean "now", but if you're asking someone to do something, it probably needs doing in a reasonable timescale. If it was low priority, you'd say "it's a low priority, by Friday is fine", if someone doesn't give a timescale, assume -today-. If you can't fit the work in today, tell them. Tell them tell them tell them tell them. This is the biggest frustration, people accepting work you're sharing because you're really struggling with deadlines, and then it not being done and then having to do it yourself at 1am. Arrrrgh 😢
But you should always ask how busy someone is and when they should be able to do it by... And they should give a proper answer and update you if things change. I'm realising I've possibly been let down a couple too many times 😂
A lot of this sort of thing is due to the desire to not appear rude.
We don't want to actually call out a boss/coworker as an incompetent idiot, we just want to heavily imply it.
Plausible deniability.
There are regional differences though. In places like Yorkshire, Birmingham, Manchester and Liverpool people tend to prefer direct communication a lot more, and get a bit annoyed if you try the southern indirect type of talking too much.
@@ajs41 Not so much Liverpool or Manchester, we also have context-based communication. And even the stereotype of the 'straight-talking Yorkshireman' isn't entirely accurate.
@@ajs41 I've never experienced people getting annoyed with the indirectness or labelling it "southern" - from Nottingham
@@baronmeduseI'm from deep fairy country and that is not our stereotype of northerners, mate. 😂😅
I have a counterexample to American directness. The context was a rafting trip with a group of Brits, in which the guide was American, and we came to a stretch of river that required us to paddle really hard. We were giving it everything, and the guide called out "That's good!", and we thought she was pleased with us so we kept paddling like crazy. A few seconds later she called again "I said that's good!" We carried on, until finally she yelled "Stop!" at which point we stopped. She asked "Why did you keep paddling when I said 'That's good'?" Apparently in American that means something like "you've done enough so you can stop", which was far from obvious to us. It seems that not everything in American communication is as direct as you might think!
So true, if someone is serving you food you say "I'm good," when you want them to stop. Americans are so expecting to hearing this phrase they might just keep going if you say, "that's enough, thanks." It's obvious after you've heard it the first time.
Indeed. The first time I heard the expression “tell me about it” was in California in 1988. And I did tell her about it 🤦♂️
That sounds confusing 😅
I give you : "I could care less...."
I don't think this is an example of communication style (as covered by the video), but rather an example of a word or phrase having varying meanings or implications across dialects
British doctors know that if a patient says "Oh, by the way..." at the end of a consultation, that's what they're mainly concerned about.
thats me
And if we say " Thanks anyway, Doctor" it means the GP totally missed the real reason for the visit.
In the US we have an annual physical exam which is commonly fully covered by medical insurance and you don't owe anything on this one. However, I've learned the hard way that the moment you say: Oh by the way... Many clinics have a policy to treat that visit as a problem visit, so mf-ers charged the insurance for 2 visits and I had to pay $50 copay 😢
@@bugtracker152 i'm sure those in the UK will be paying for primary care consultations before long. The current system is unsustainable.
@@ChimpingBulldog Many people don't realise that the GPs they are seeing now, work for an independent company who contracts to the NHS. People paying privately won't just suddenly make more GPs appear from nowhere, they will be the same people.
UK born and raised here. I immediately thought of Yes Minister the TV series: "Brave decision Minister" which of course caused the Minister to go into paroxysms of worry that it was an extremely bad decision.
"Controversial" means this will lose you votes. "Courageous" means this will lose you the election.
That also depends on how you say it, as well as the words.
Omg I was just thinking of that one! 🤣 🤣
I wonder what Americans would make of Yes Minister? I'm sure it would go well over their heads.
@@repr0bate1 Some might have finally gotten their heads around it after a challenge of 30+ years to figure it out😉.They might find Rick Mayall's ( RIP & what a Giant of Comedy ) "The New Statesman " - easier to follow - and laugh at.
Had a mate at university, somewhat older than us, who described everything from absolute perfection to an utter clusterfuck as "marvellous" - it was all in the pitch and spin, you knew exactly what he meant.
He from Newcastle? That's what we say, meaning "there is no salvaging this and give up"
marvellous either means delightful in a good way or “this is going so terribly its actually entertaining “
If I had to explain stuff to you. It's so much easier to do it myself. Your sacked!
When Americans say "You're doing great, great job!" it just sounds like the most insincere thing anyone can say.
As a Brit, I have to agree. When people use superlatives about everything, it devalues the praise and makes it difficult to be convincing when you want to praise something strongly. That isn't a problem we Brits have . . . !
Agreed. I ordered my meal in an American restaurant and the waiter gushed how "awesome!" my choice was.
Absolute peak insincerity.
And patronising too.
@@georgeprout42 did you say 'don't take the bloody piss, love!'
@@georgeprout42 when he asked later if everything was okay, did you say that the food was „edible“?
Being a Brit that worked for US companies for over 20 years, I can tell you, your video is absolutely brilliant.
You should start a corporate British / American communication company.
You do not come over to the UK and in front of all her employees, tell them that their female MD , here, is full of spunk.
OMG, did that really happen?🤭
Nothing like having a woman full of spunk !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
In the same boat here re working for Americans for a couple of decades. I'd sometimes spend an hour with my American boss quietly translating English English into American English so he'd understand what what my British colleagues had just said in a meeting. By the end of his time in the UK he'd say "that's interesting" to the bloke who'd just presented the dumbest idea in Christendom, and our eyes would meet across the conference table....
Even if she is, that isn't appropriate at work.
Yes, we have that word here, too, but only 12 year old boys would find it funny. 🤣
My (northern English) husband taught me (southern English) to understand his mother. When i asked her if she wanted something, if she said "i don't mind" this was an enthusiastic yes. If she said "I'm not bothered" that meant she *really* didn't want it.
im from Manchester, my Dearly beloved was raised in Doncaster.. in our early days I asked if she wanted to go to the cinema, she replied "I'm not bothered," so i offered to buy the tickets. She was perplexed saying "but I said Im not bothered" in Manchester that means " I have not real opinion, happy either way" in Doncaster it means " i do not want to do this"
"I don't mind" is a shortening of "I don't mind if I do".
A guy from the Deep South(ern US) once told me that where he came from, "I don't mind" means that the person *does* mind--in other words (my best attempt to explain the logic), "don't mind" seems to mean, "I wouldn't contemplate it."
German here. Having watched so many American RUclipsrs complain about The German Directness, this is fascinating. 😊
Alot of us have German ancestry and we all understand directness. It depends where you are from.
@@greghamann2099 I have heard „blunt, harsh, rude“ from Americans who live here. But I‘m glad to hear that there are others that do understand our ways. 🙏🏻😃
Learning German I had to learn how to say things imperatively, when of course, I had almost never done that. You would always start with "It would be nice if..." etc.
I once read of businesses from mainly English speaking countries like UK, US, Canada, Australia sending their executives to a "Learn to Speak English" course. We English speakers especially Canada, US, Australia and maybe the UK too use many metaphors, sayings, slang in everyday speech. We are so used to it. A German or person not used to English may struggle with some of the sayings we use all the time.
@@dg-hughes Some. Some, he says. It's been 40 years.
Following a fire at the welding/fabrication shop I was working at at the time - a hydraulic pack had sparked off &, despite us emptying six fire extinguishers on it, was cheerfully consuming several million pounds worth of equipment not to mention severely damaging the building - & all we could do was stand at a safe distance & wait for the Fire Brigade - my manager turned to me & said "That's a bit unfortunate, isn't it?" To which I replied "Yeah - I think we are going to have a little bit of trouble getting this weeks orders out." An American listening in would probably think we were experiencing a minor inconvenience rather than watching half the business go up in flames.
It’s like the message a British pilot said over the intercom to his passengers when all four engines had stopped working and he called it a “little inconvenience”.
@@molybdomancer195 That was Capt. Eric Moody who sadly died recently, after his Jumbo Jet, a Boeing 747, ran into an invisible (at night) cloud of volcanic ash over Indonesia: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress." A masterpiece of understatement. Oh, and they did of course get them going again... eventually!
@@molybdomancer195 To me, a "little inconvenience" is a blocked toilet that should clear with a second flush.
@@1947daveno doubt after losing at least ten thousand feet of altitude in the process.
@@mothmagic1 14 minutes and 25 thousand feet before all engines restarted
As a British native with Asperger's, I feel your pain. But be assured, it only takes a few decades to figure it all out!
.... 66 and counting, still trying to figure it all out. 😉😆
Yeah... but no. As far as I know I'm not on any "spectrum" but I just want a plain simple instruction. "Can you check if the windows are open, and if they are, please close them."
@alex_the_balding_fat_man
Alex, as someone who is on the spectrum…you might be on the spectrum.
I have Asperger's, too.
I am English.
I am 43.
I have such dry humour and a neutral speech tone that the only way people can tell when I'm joking is if I smile. I've had to fight people in the past because I said something I thought was an obvious joke, but it was taken personally. It is very rare that I take anything seriously, but I only laugh in my head (is that an Asperger's 'thing?) so most people can't tell whether I'm joking or not without that smile. I was in my mid 20s before anyone told me that I don't laugh like normal people. I hadn't realised the disconnect between my brain and my body.
Until you think about it and then get confused all over again.
First one - asking you to check THAT the window is open means it needs to be open - asking you IF the window is open means that it needs to be closed.
That’s easy.
That's very true I never thought of that subtle difference in the way we speak. I probably would have just asked them to clarify if it was meant to be open or closed before going up 😂
Communication is a joint responsibility. If you're unsure, ask.
My thoughts exactly
Yes
Your last point about the statement - ‘when you get a minute’ doesn’t mean do it now, it means that I don’t know what you are currently doing, or how important that is, so can you do what I am asking as soon as you can!
It can mean two things: said unsarcastically, it means "do it when you're ready". But it can also be said sarcastically, meaning "you really ought to have done it by now, so you'd better do it as quickly as possible!"
Yeah I agree, as soon as you can. It has some priority for me, please don't forget.
Agreed. It means "this needs doing pretty soon but I'm not literally asking you to abandon your current task and do it immediately"
I've definitely experienced it as "I don't know what you're doing, or how important it is, but it can probably wait until you've done this."
We Brits are masters of sarcasm, banter, and not saying what you mean. Unless someone from another country is VERY aware of this, i can imagine how difficult it would be to get to grips with it 😂😂
Its very much how you say it and the face that says it. We could say something is interesting and mean it or say it sarcastically but the former would probably have an immediate follow up with more questions
@@theotherside8258 You don't say. We Germans would never try to out-sarcasm you.
@@KaiHenningsen Ha! Very clever! You've struck just the right balance so we don't know if you mean it, or have been quietly taking the piss out of us all these years. You're not Henning Wehn are you?
Canadians as well have inherited this trait as a result of our commonwealth membership.
Even worse writing it online.
Your window example made your point perfectly, as it never occurred to me that someone would look to see if the window was open but not close it in response to that statement. It made me realise how I take understanding of the hidden meaning for granted.
I've had issues when describing someone as being a lovely person. To an American, I am describing what they look like but to us British, it usually means they have a pleasant character. They can be as ugly as sin but still be a lovely person.
I'm from the US, and would think it could mean either one. Where I'm from, "lovely" sounds like an adjective an older person might say.
@@miriamrobarts I am guilty of being advanced in years. Ha!
Yes, I always think 'lovely' is about character, personality before anything else.
The 'Im just popping out for Lunch, does anyone want anything?' Isnt a hard and fast I dont want peoples orders, they will often be quite happy to get one or two items like a chocolate bar or a can of drink for one or two people. They just dont want ten people giving them a full lunch order.
Yeah I though exactly this. I would never ask if someone wants something if I didn't mean it, just us Brits know to not go overboard if taking advantage of the offer, that's bad manners.
@@W0rdsandMus1c Then you, duck, must be up North!
My answer to this question would be “can you get me half a hundred weight of potatoes (that’s 56 lbs) and a nice cauliflower please”. This would be met with a bemused ‘are you serious’ look. 😂
@@sroberts605 Nope, nothing to do with north versus south - I work in London and anybody asking if anyone wants anything would mean it in my workplaces.
I think there really is a bit of a North/South divide thing: when I worked in London the couple of other Northerners in the office would take me up on the offer to pick up anything while I was out from day one, but it took the Londoners more time to realise I really meant it. It got to a point where I had to specify "I'm only going to the sandwich shop across the road, does anyone want anything from there?" unless I wanted to spend most of my lunch hour chasing down everyone's orders. But I was brought up to always do stuff like politely make the offer, it's only now I'm typing this that I'm realising I didn't have to do it at all, most people never even offered.
(It's also now occurring to me that later on, in a different job, I probably didn't need to make up to nine other people tea or coffee every morning just because I wanted a cuppa. But where I'm from that's just what you do; if you're the one who's making tea you offer because it would be unconscionably unfriendly not to do so. I think it just goes hand in hand with the way we're usually automatically pretty hospitable in the far North of England too, I'm always apologetic if I can't offer a guest something relatively substantial to eat, even if they spring a surprise visit on me! ("Here's your coffee, I'm really sorry, but I've not been to the shops yet this week and I've only got biscuits." - with a guilty feeling that I should probably have at least made sandwiches). Pretty much everyone I know round here is similar, so I guess that's just a cultural thing?)
I used to work as a cross cultural coach and some of my clients were Americans dealing with British colleagues (and v.v). Indirectness of communication is a well known feature of British culture - or to be more precise, southern English - much less so in Northern England and Scotland where forthrightness/directness is more common. Because a lot of my work was about cross cultural communication in business, I collected examples of misunderstandings and used them in future training/coaching sessions. One of my favourites was:
English Project Director in team meeting, to team leader: “I wonder if you’d like to get your team to have another look at the content of the client presentation? Then tomorrow we can have a chat about our strategy for the meeting”.
What British team heard : “You screwed up, the presentation is awful, but there’s time to recover the situation if you and your team get on it right now and revise it. Bring it to me tomorrow so I can check it’s good to go.”
American team leader heard: “No big deal, a few minor alterations required, boss is just a bit nervous because it’s a big client.”
Most of the Midlands prefers direct talking as well. It could be a minority of the country that does this indirect type of speaking.
@ajs41 this may be why i struggle in the midlands as a southerner 😂 my partner takes things really literally as he is from here and im always like YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT... turns out he doesnt always know what i meant 😂
@@ajs41 have lived and worked in Nottingham my whole life, I can't say that I agree
This is so true. Brit with an American boss. I have a reverse example. My boss praised my honesty. I asked if that meant I complained a lot or had a brutal communication style. She literally meant she knew I would tell her my truthful opinion!
@@alanstrang277 Yes! A manager a few years ago told me he loved my honesty while laughing and wincing as he read an email I'd cc'ed him in to. I later realised he meant "Ouch, that was rather impolitic". But it needed saying, so I chose to carry on taking him to mean he loved my honesty. Ironic really 😎
If a Brit says “wonderful” or “fantastic”, “tremendous” “brilliant” etc BUT with a falling tone of voice…it is sarcasm and means the exact opposite of that word. A rising tone means take it literally, I am happy.
I'm a Brit (Geordie) living in the northeastern US, and I find praise/criticism is one area where Americans are not literal at all. Where a Geordie might often say, "That's a **** stupid idea!", in the US most will want to avoid giving offence (offense!) and will say, "That's awesome!" If the American says it with genuine enthusiasm, they like the idea, but if the tone is different it means they think it's a stupid idea, or mediocre. (This is why everything here in the US is "awesome" or "amazing"!). I worked with a lot of working class Geordies, and they can use devastating wit and subtlety when they choose, but also be brutally direct at other times.
Livin' the dream. In a minor key.
Tone is very important to Brits, which is why emails are so often misread.
@@MrThebigcheese75 Hence the rise of Smiley etc & Emoji etc tags.
lol yes I say bloody brilliant when clearly it’s so not 😂😂
Funny thing I heard an American saying they tried to order food in some European countries and when they asked "can I get a coffee" (meaning I'd like a coffee) and got the straightforward reply that they can, it just left them confused why they weren't being given a coffee (as the employee didn't get a direct request for coffee).
So it seems that the US does use some hidden meaning (that would be understood in the UK, but maybe other non-English countries don't understand it since it's a second language to you).
Strangely, I found a lot of these aren't how I'm used to in the UK. Perhaps there's a bit of a regional divide. For example, when my boss asks me to do something when I have a minute, he actually means that. He means "You're busy with more important tasks but this needs doing once those higher priorities are done"
But I do agree with some of those where we understate our feelings of disappointment or excitement. I'm not sure if it's sarcasm, humility or what, but we definitely don't like to go to extremes of praise or criticism
I like "Is that the time?". This can variously mean "I'm fed up with talking to you", "Don't you have somewhere else to be?" or "Why don't you just bugger off?"
Normally just a subtle, deep breath and an appropriately inflected, "Anyway..." Will also do the trick. See also "Soooo, I'll let you get on..."
@@jneilson7568"I'll let you get on" is one short step away from "OK, sod off right now "
@@DanBeech-ht7sw 😆
Literally earlier today my friend used "what time is it" to get me to leave their house because they wanted to go to bed
'I'm going to let you go' means the same. Except in an office. Then it means you're fired.
I also think that culturally it is not so much about hidden meanings as politeness. In the UK "Are you making a coffee?" Is not even a request for coffee, but it can be a fishing expedition to see if the other person would offer one. The other person will feel bad if they have a reason not to make two and feel obliged. It allows the other person to make the offer. We also have the option to change our minds and move ahead and ask if they will make us one if they don't offer.. "Would you mind making me one if you're there?" Longer worded requests or two or more part requests are more polite in english because it is a way to show the other person you know it is a nusiance. The more trouble you put someone to, the bigger the favour, the longer the question or the longer the exchange.. "I'm so sorry and I don't want to be a nuisance but if it's not too much trouble would you mind... " Indirectness has a similar effect.
In the Netherlands, it's the opposite, it can be rude not to be direct.. so the level of directness comes from a place of sensitivity to others and good manners.
Your observations are very astute, and in my opinion, the British indirectness reflects a desire to communicate, but not risk offending or embarrassing. As you say, it is just the way we are. I had similar issues when working in Germany and caused much confusion among German collegues when using sarcasm, understatement or a mild attempt at humour. Later, when my German has improved and I would use the same expressions but now in German, the 'confusion' was replaced by a lecture on what nonsence I was talking. Idioms do not work well outside their own habitat!
Brilliant explanation - and I mean it, despite being a Brit! I was once trying to find the “rest room” in an American hotel but couldn’t and had to go back to the concierge for more help. I began with “You must think I’m really stupid…” and back came the reply “Oh no sir, I don’t think you’re stupid at all!”
As I overheard an English professor of chemistry say to a (post)graduate student: well, it's just a suggestion....but you might like to bear in mind who's making it". And then he left the lab and went back to his office.
Love that!
Irish here, living abroad. We use so much tonality as well. Rely heavily on sarcasm. ‘Isn’t this just lovely?’ Is a good example - can be face value but context matters. 2hr plane delay ‘well, isn’t that just lovely?’ Trending towards the negative side would be ‘well, that’s just wonderful’ - means ‘jesus Christ this is a disaster’.
I work in a multicultural European environment and in my particular office work on humour based methods. Non-native English speaking Colleagues have adopted this. Gallows humour. On my side I’ll put extra emphasis on tone, exaggerating it to make my meaning clear, and I also communicate more directly. A recent change in the makeup of colleagues in terms of nationalities has meant I’ve had to use language which I consider rude to an extent ‘it’s your job to ensure that this is done’ - that’s so hard for me to say as in a British or Irish work environment that would be one of the harshest criticisms that could be given. But in my case now, it’s simply that new colleagues don’t know who is supposed to do what and to avoid me having to do their job, I have to be super direct. It’s painful for me
I'm also Irish and I agree. Having to be so direct feels rude and entitled. To use the original anecdote "go close the window" would feel so bossy and entitled to say to someone. The subtext would be "I'm a bad person"
There's an apocryphal story dating back to WW2 when a US armoured column advanced ahead of a British infantry brigade. A wooded hillside was possibly thought to contain German troops. The British CO asked of the US CO 'Have you cleared the woods yet ? To which the American answered 'Yes'. The British infantry advanced and immediately started taking fire from enemy positions on the hill. Of course... by 'cleared' the Americans understood that they had got safely past the possible enemy positions and reached safe ground. The British on the other hand understood that the Americans had 'cleared' (neutralised) all enemy troops from that hillside, and that it was now safe to proceed.
See also the Battle of Imjin River in Korea, where the British Brigadier reported the situation of his 650 men, surrounded by 10,000 Chinese, as "pretty sticky" to his American commander. The intended message did not get through.
Not a bad video, incidentally.
@@simong9067 If I remember rightly the British troops had also run out of ammunition too, and the US General didn't get that the statement was a cry for help.
What the British CO should have asked was if the wood was cleared of all enemy occupation or activity.
@@davidmartin8211 What, the US should not have reported that they had cleared the woods of enemy combats if they had done nothing of the sort
@@AndoCommando1000 according to the story the US Commander was asked if they had cleared the woods with no discussion of combatant removal. It should have been cleared out. Linguistic shortcuts are very common but often lead to confusion.
The joy of British understatement. The phase ‘that could have gone better’ can mean that whatever you are doing has encountered some minor issues along the way, or that you have made a complete pigs ear of whatever you were trying to do.
As for the ‘we should meet up sometime’ it just far more polite than telling some one you’d be happy to never see them again.
It me "that could have gone better" means that was so badly, it's a wonder no-one ended in hospital, sued or fired, or possibly all three. It's not something you want to hear,
'That could have gone better' is the sort of thing you say when the engine you were testing blew itself to pieces and tore the test bed apart.
"That could have gone better..." is only half of the complete phrase. The second half isn't commonly spoken as a brit hearing it automatically completes it in their head - "...because it certainly couldn't have gone any worse."
If you really would like to meet them again, you have to be far more specific: "D'you fancy meeting for a drink tomorrow evening?" or "How about lunch next Tuesday?" is a clear message that you actually want to do it.
@@arabellamileham9978 Yes indeed. "A pig's ear" doesnt have an obvious meaning to anyone who hasn't been introduced to the concept already.
A difference between US and UK that I've noticed is that people from the US will say something like "I'm a great tennis player, or, yes, I played amazing tennis today." To the majority of people in the UK this would be considered arrogant bragging and you'd be laughed at for your lack of humility. A Brit would be less direct and downplay their skill: "Yeah, I'm not bad at tennis, I do enjoy it and I'm happy with how I played today."
If you ask a Brit how his tennis match went, a typical response of "it was a good game" will tell you he won. "My opponent played well" probably means he lost.
@@jrd33 yes, well said
My mum would often refer to American men who bragged as, 'the big I am.' It never failed to make me laugh.
So true
‘I dabble’ = World Class
I’m an American (a mostly life-long New Yorker, if that’s ok) and if someone said to me “Hey, can you check if the upstairs window is open?” I would ABSOLUTELY assume I should IMMEDIATELY close the window to preclude problems that might arise while we were out, whether rain or gust of wind or whatever. Of course, this American/New Yorker was raised by very Irish parents, so the possibility of rain is always looming in the brain. (Maybe a native Californian should be forgiven in this situation, whether high or low context?)
I agree. Why else would you ask someone to check?
I think I would assume that they wanted the window open: 'check if the window is open' = 'the window should be open, so check and see that it is, and if not, then open it'.
@@williambulmer6389 agreed, I would say, check if or that the window is closed, if I want it closed. If I want it open then I'd use the word open.
@@sisterrosetta57 Sometimes it helps to cool a building down by opening that top window of the skylight. So in the morning that office that faced the sun wouldn't be too hot, especially in Summer .
And it would let in fresh air to an office room made stale by people & their work gadgets.
( Of course this isn't taking into account any perceived Security Risks and any risk of raindrops coming in. " Horses for Courses" eh?
@@williambulmer6389 but there would be context suggesting that it was too cold - why else would they ask?
I worked on a chemical plant in the US (Alabama). The company was British owned, workforce American, commissioning engineers British. The section of the plant I was commissioning could theoretically 'exotherm' (explode) & great care had been taken in the design to eliminate the risk & everybody was aware of the problem. On the day of start up things were going slowly & I was bored, so over the intercom received by all I announced " All's fine, no exotherm yet". A typical British remark to make light of a serious situation, & as the plant wasn't a smoking ruin all was OK. The US manager went ballistic, I was never to mention the E word again unless it actually happened- somewhat lacking in sang-froid, I thought.
@charlesbrecknell4656
The manager was perfectly right. Any intercom message could be misheard, or only partially heard, so that 'exotherm' might be the only word heard, or recognised. This is about the limits of sound transmission, not culture.
Good point. When I was in the RAF we were told that if you got a ride in a fast jet then the pilot would never say the word "eject" unless it is time to bail out. He would say things like "we may have to abandon the aircraft" or words to that effect. If you heard him say "eject eject eject" you were meant to go on the first ej...
@@tomblack8211 Pilots and air traffic controllers also do this. The only time they use the word "takeoff" is when they are giving clearance for a plane to throttle up its engines and start accelerating down the runway. Any other time it's referred to as "departure", because you REALLY don't want someone to mistakenly think they're allowed to take off and go barelling down the runway as someone else is occupying it
I (a Brit) worked for a US company that had "thermal events" rather than e.g. "the car spontaneously caught fire, burned through the handbrake cable, rolled into another car and caused that car to catch fire too".
Tenerife
What's your greatest weakness?
Interpreting semantics of a question but ignoring the pragmatics
...Could you give an example?
Yes, I could.
I love self-referencing jokes.
@@thiloreichelt4199 Is it ignorance or is it apathy? I don't know and I don't care.
@@leisti Than do not comment.
While I have to infer that you somehow dislike my comment, I do not understand what you are trying to express.
@@thiloreichelt4199 I'm so sorry: I should have been more literal, and written something like this:
"Since you like self-referencing jokes, here's another one: Is it ignorance or is it apathy? I don't know and I don't care."
@@leisti Sorry, I do not get it this time. But I'm German, I'm not supposed to understand humor anyhow.
This is really true with use of swear words where context is everything. If you are in the pub and someone says "Oi, you xxxxer" it can mean the opposite depending on delivery- someone is picking a fight and you should get out, or an old and dear friend is about to buy you a pint.
Absolutely and if you hear someone being addressed as "pal" then there's about to be a bar brawl if the other guy doesn't back down smartish.
First day away from home (day #1 at Uni), it threw me when I encountered "Hey, you bastard" as a Geordie greeting between best mates.
Many Australians nearly always use expletives at some point in almost every conversation. A good friend you havent seen for several months will be greeted as "hey Bill, you [C U Next Tuesday]! " Someone you despise might be greeted with exactly the same words, just different body language or tone of voice. Very confusing for visitors to the country!
@@afpwebworks I watched an Australian dashcam video programme, and was appalled at the language: in one clip the driver went a whole 20 seconds without once saying "F***!"
My first time ever hearing the phrase "you're all set" was when booking into a hotel in Long Island, New York. I just stood there, not understanding what she meant. She repeated it, then I asked, confused, because she didn't seem to be doing anything, if there was anything else she needed... to which she answered, "no, you're all set" and I think that's when the penny finally dropped!
Brilliant analysis! I'm a 77 yr old Brit, married to a Canadian and living in the US and even at my age this clarified so much that has baffled me in communicating with Americans. My Grandmother was from Lancashire and was as blunt as can be, and always said what she meant - so regional differences don't help in understanding either!
I remember seeing the films ‘Midway’ and ‘1917’ fairly close together, in Midway, the Americans had to big each other and themselves up, shouting about how great they all are. In 1917, the two British soldiers sent on a dangerous mission just quietly get on with it, without any histrionics. I know which approach I prefer.
You see exactly the same thing in videos from Afghanistan and Iraq. The US are all "hoo-ya, whoooo, that's what I'm talking about" and nearby Brits are just looking at them and thinking "pillocks"
@@Kyrelel When ISAF were searching the Tora Bora hills for Bin Laden and ran into some heavy resistance based around a fortified cave system, the resulting battles led to the Americans calling the area the 'Caves of Death' and the Brits nicknaming it 'Tora Bora Tomkinson'. I expect a few well-worn pin-up posters were eventually left there.
Thats pretty clear from how you've written about them. Then again, if you are from Britain that is what you are used to - it is normal. I know lots of Brits who have travelled to the US and find it funny when the plane reaches the east coast and the Americans on the flight whoop and cheer.
I noticed who you mentioned 1917 ... which coincidentally was the end of the war when the Americans finally decided to turn up when all the hard work was already done.
Americans cheer on a plane? How odd!
Perhaps they don't have faith in the airline, and they're cheering they made it in one piece.
It rains a lot in the UK and so you don't want to leave a window open, so if you are asked to check if a window is open then it is understood that if it is open, you would close it.
I work for the EMEA region and see this a lot. I work with a lot of Germans and Dutch where directness is appreciated but as a Brit, we are well versed in reading between the lines, picking up on alternate meanings despite what is actually being said. My favorite examples of the low context/high context scale is with the Finnish. They are even more sarcastic than the Brits and a lot less emotional. If a Finn says "the project went OK" then a Brit will think it wasn't that good, an American will think it was good but a Finn will think wow, OK. That project was a massive success 🙂
In my experience, Finnish people do not catch on suddle sarcasm signs so our alternative is very dramatic so people in the room get the hint. Usually older people do not understand sarcasm at all. 😂
I had two duvets on the chair, one dark pattern the other light pattern I asked my colleague to pass me the light one. He picked both of them up and said " I don't know which one is light they feel about the same".
The magic word that you didn't say to them was 'pattern'.
Your colleague was winding you up.
Ig next time try "bright" not "light" 😂
Quite honestly in the first example I would immediately ask "Do you want the window open?" then knowing what is expected of me before going upstairs.
I woud say "Please go upstairs, if the window is open, then shut it"..:)
A lot of examples you cite are understatement. This is typically British and I use it frequently.
Yes, I remember a whimsical drama from the 70s. Someone was reading the diary of an antarctic adventurer, ' 12 miles from South Pole. A bit parky'.
For non Brits, 'parky' means cold. I don't know why.
By which you mean you use it a bloody lot ;-)
I heard an American producer talk about his experience working with Aardman animations on the film Chicken Run. Nick Park and Co said they understood the notes given to them, and thought they were good ideas ... The producer came back to find they'd ignored his notes and did the opposite.
Fascinating!! I studied a little bit about Japanese communication in a business class once, so interesting and I'm a geek for learning about cultural things like this!
Of course they did! 🤣🤣🇬🇧👍
of course - the underlying context being ‘they were “good ideas” ‘ but not quite good enough to be utilised (like saying ‘interesting’ instead of ‘meh’)
That sounds typically British.
Now I'm wondering: if a British person wishes to express, literally, that someone else's ideas or contributions are good and/or interesting, how do they do it? That is, if "That's interesting" => "That's terrible", solve for X: X => "That's interesting".
In Scotland we are raised with sarcasm and our mates ripping into us so language becomes a riddle :)
Yes, I have just finished my first 'Rebus' detective novel (based in Edinburgh) and find the sarcasm both stinging and very funny.
Also true of irish
Probably the best example - If you meet a Scot in rough pub in Glasgow and he calls you 'old pal' it does NOT mean he thinks you are an endearing long-term friend!!
'Aye Right', can mean, 'Naw' 😂
Ken.
"Is that right?" in a mediocre tone is the best reply I've ever heard to either accept, reject or mock a statement.
Is that so
Yeah right. Or just, right. Is very common here in Aus.
Female equivalent "REALLY,Now?
If you say so.
For real....
Favourite is 'it's not ideal' meaning it's an utter shambles
Ah the beauty of British Sarcasm, has no limits!
I attended an English Grammar School. Seven years of perfecting sarcasm by both the boys and the masters.
@@derningtona Mine was next to The Kennington Oval in South East London,1965-71. Exactly the same:)
Ugh. Maybe Americans are just kinder. We consider sarcasm rude, whereas the British seem to think it’s a fun game.
"Im just popping out for lunch, does anybody want anything?" means, round our bit " I will get the first person who replies one thing and the rest of you know not to ask.
In Oz, my mother in law did not do well on a govt dementia assessment where shown a document and asked, "Can you read this out loud?" replied "Yes, of course".
- "Could you check the window?"
- "Yeah sure - you want it closed?"
That would be the response I'd expect 😊
If in doubt, ask!
.....I feel cold, can you check if the front door is open?.....yep it's open 😂
can you throw to peas in the pot?....yep, two peas
@@MarisaPaola-um5ybI have this 'caught in the middle' situation with my British husband quite regularly. He feels I go overboard when I check on things or explain things, but I'm well aware of how easily things can be totally misunderstood. He finds this condescending or controlling, but heaven help me if there's a misunderstanding because either way, I'm always at fault. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. 😢
was just about to say, this is pretty much exactly how the conversation would go - we often follow up with a question of confirmation of assumed intent according to context - think some people are acting like we're telepathic
Big one I had to get used to when working with Americans is when I great people normally, in the UK, I say "you alright?" Or "how's it going?"
I was shocked yo find my American colleagues actually would give me an earnest answer and tell me how they were feeling.
Took me a bit to realise that they just genuinely thought I was asking 😅 and they weren't oversharing, I literally asked.
Obviously in the UK "you alrigh" or "how's it going?" "How's life keeping you?" "How do you do?"
All just mean "hello" and the response a brit will expect it something along the lines of "I'm good, thanks, you?"
Irregardless if you are actually ok.
And I'd follow up with a "yeah I'm good" or something similar.
If I am genuinely struggling and need to inform someone I'm not ok I would say "as good as can be expected"
This would then garner a response from a brit genuinely asking. "Is everything OK?" Or "Oh dear, what's happened?"
We are a funny lot
Brit living in Germany here: no matter how hard I try I can't shake the habit of greeting people by saying "y'alright?" or "how ya doing?" or something along these lines.
Had a lot of German baristas and shop workers look at me especially confused when I walk in and ask them "wie geht's?" before giving my order. Seems it doesn't exactly translate culturally 😅😅
Actually, there's a more extreme version recently arrived in Britain, of "y'a'righ" (it's always pronounced like this). It's when something has happened to you in public/you have asked for help/you look like you might become a burden to the person saying it, who is walking on. It means "I am not going to help you, now get outta my face". You hear it quite often now when everyone and everything is mistrusted.
I forgot to say, "y'a'righ" is not a question about your health: it's a second stage contraction of "Na, y'a'righ" which means a blank No, as in "I wouldn't touch it with a bargepole, go away"... (You hear this everywhere.)
We also use Indirect communication to be polite and not order you about, even if you are a subordinate. Think about your examples and see if the person was just simply trying to avoid ‘telling you what to do’ e.g. ‘can you check if the window is open’ (because it needs to be closed before we can go) vs ‘Go upstairs, close the window and report back to me’.
I think one of my favourite expressions in English is "With all due respect" ;)
YES! i.e With all due DISrespect...lol
Yeah, me too. You can say it quite sincerely to someone you think is due no respect at all 🤣
Yeah
Means “I literally could not have any less respect for you”
@@IsleofskyeIt's used in the Courts of the British Legal Systems quite frequently, too, along with referring to other barrister(s) as " My Learned Friend(s)".
@@noelsalisbury7448 Or, indeed,in The House Of Commons: "My Honourable Friend."...
If your on a train in the UK and a sweet little old lady (yes, maybe me) asks you quietly and politely if the seat next to you, the one with your bag on it, "is taken?" move your bag immediately! You are in imminent danger!
Be on the tube when a group of American teenagers get on and one very pretty girl says 'He called you, what was it? A 'Wanker? I wonder what it means? Trouble is after you get up off the floor , you have to explain. 🤣
British understatement, irony and sarcasm do not travel well. I was involved in designing an emergency radio system for the Dutch government. During a conversation with the Dutch representative, it was humorously suggested that as well as being used by the police, fire and ambulance services, the system might also find an application with the Dutch mountain rescue service. To which came the very serious reply "We have no mountains in Holland."
Interesting because I thought the Dutch themselves always call it the Netherlands and get quite irritated with people calling it Holland when referring to the entire country.
@@ryanmitcham5522 their choice of words not mine. It was the 1970s and the representatives may have been concerned with a region of the whole system. The radio system in question was deployed very successfully and operated for a number of years until replaced by a more modern digital alternative.
@@ryanmitcham5522Correct. We were politely but firmly told we were in the Kingdom of the Netherlands. Holland is a province.
Aw, Kalyn bless your little cotton socks 😜
"It's like a desert in here" is the one you need to know. It means my glass is empty and it's your round.
Man's not a camel 😂
Did somebody forget to pay the water bill?
Swear words and obscenities in British English is something that scared the s+++ out my American friends at College. We use these words in every day conversations, but to the Americans it was rude and scary at times.
Some 20 years ago, buses in the Metropolitan Washington Area carried large ads for the Austin Powers movie "The Spy Who Sh***** Me"". That word was absolutely fine in the USA, but it would not have been acceptable in London (or, now, on RUclips).
I am British and my parents and my generation would never have used bad or offensive language.
@@russellbradley454 Guess it all comes down to the communities one lives, Council Estates or Privet Estates, Cities or Farm Towns and so on.
Yes, it really depends. There's always a risk of overgeneralising. Maybe on average Brits are freer with swearwords, but it's far from unknown to come across an American who swears casually and profusely. I've never heard my mum (working class Brit) say anything stronger than "sod" (nor did her parents, while alive, at least not in my presence), although I expect "sod" sounds ruder to her generation than it does to mine.
The Irish and the Australians massively outswear the Brits.
No, you were right about the window. I'm British and it wasn't clear what was wanted; security against burglars, or good ventilation against damp. It's not obvious.
However, 'That's interesting' usually translates to 'Have you lost your fucking mind?'.
"Hey, could you pop upstairs and make sure the window is shut please?"
@@mrmessy7334 Yep, my thoughts exactly!
To me there's a difference in wording depending if you want security or ventilation.
"Can you check if the window's open?" implies you want it shut.
"Can you check that the window's open?" implies you want it open.
@@zak3744 No, I agree that 'check that' implies you expect it to be open, so probably want it open, but 'check if' gives no clue as to what is wanted.
@@zak3744I agree, that's how I would talk and interpret too.
The example you gave at first with the window is funny to me. Having lived in the UK my whole life, I immediately understood it, but it also took me a few seconds to realise where your particular story was going. Then I went "Oooh."
This is not only extraordinarily accurate, it's insightful as to why.
In my Cornish family we have a phrase which sums this up. It is 'I heard what you said, but I knew what you meant!'
"I won't keep you" in the UK means "The conversation is over; it has gone on too long already: go away/I'm off".
Anyway, I'll let you get on
@@piggypiggypig1746 Or the ultimate 'Don't let me detain you'.
The one from the Movie ' A Bridge too Far '.........
"Was there anything else ? "
Brit here. This made me giggle. The classic British understatement is a cultural thing as is sarcasm/irony "a bit of a problem" may well mean a disaster or emergency but context tone and body language is important.
"Interesting idea" could mean interesting but could mean stupid or risky.
My British husband is pretty literal and would not have understood he was supposed to shut the window either though
Thanks for watching! I appreciate the solidarity from your British husband, at least there are a few Brits out there who would like you all to be a bit more direct as well. ;)
No love, your husband is just ignoring you.
@@GirlGoneLondonofficial There absolutely are, yes. Although I think the majority of us are autistic - I know I am.
@@Stephen-Fox Yep, I've run into interpretation problems because of that.
I'm English, and would've gone to check the window, shut it, and then come back and said "Yep, it was open" just as a silly joke, and then I'd tell e'm "that I'd closed it - was that a mistake? Should I go back and open it again?"..... sarcastic/silly humour that I love!! 😜
I was about to be quintessentially British just now and say that I often say "that's not half bad" when I actually mean "that's actually pretty decent" when I realised that "pretty decent" is an understatement in itself. I basically mean it's pretty good but I find it SO hard to directly say that lol (damn I didn't realise how ingrained in us it is to understate literally everything!)
- another phrase I say a lot is "that was a tad harsh" meaning "that was actually quite rude/mean/harsh"
Only ‘quite’ rude…not very rude then?😂 in the US ‘quite’ means very. Saying actually is another context phrase too…it means ‘to be literal’ which assumes that without ‘actually’ there is still some leeway.
@@contessa.adellaah this hurts my head lol.
For me "quite rude" means somewhere between very rude and a bit rude. So not extremely rude but more than just slightly rude - enough to be a bit taken aback by it but not overly shocked/upset/offended by it. Whereas, "a tad" means "just a small amount".
Does that even make sense? 😂
Funnily enough, if I thought something was very rude, I'd most likely say "wow, that was quite rude"
Interesting video! I like the high/low concept idea. As a native Brit I can add that "quite good" can also mean "fantastic, brilliant and the best thing I've ever experienced in my whole life".
So to be fair to us Brits - with the window thing. The clue is that no-one is going to ask you to check something and not perform some action if the thing we have asked you to check is obviously not in the state it should be in. For example if someone says "can you check I turned the heating off" or "can you check I turned the cooker off" - it's very much implied that if the object we want you to check is not in the state we wish it to be in, then you should rectify that upon confirmation. No-one will ever ask you to check if the window is open - and expect just an answer of yes it is or no it wasn't.
we would be non-leading if we were asking the literal - "is the window open or closed at the moment?"
"Can I get..." used when ordering something in a restaurant or asking for something in a shop always sounds really odd to me.
"May I have...", or, "I'd like...", make much more sense to me.
I think that means you're over 40 (please correct me if I'm wrong!)
It's a truly awful new expression. If I phone a company and they want to "take me through security", they might say "can I get your date of birth (e.g.)". I say "ok, I'll hold the line then while you look it up". Or someone goes up to a counter in shop and asks for something that's behind, do they expect to go around and get it for themselves?
@@oldpigsqueal3578 "Can I get..." used when ordering something in a restaurant is a legitimate use of the phrase as you, the person ordering, does not know if they have everything on the menu 'in stock' as they might have run out of some stuff.
Understand the point but guys ...please dont analyse language word by word....new phrases come in to express something in a holistic way ....this one just is meaning ( ...an order basically ) ....its fun to talk about but of we would need ( yes tedious hehe ) computational stats to know if " Can i get " ...is supplanting other ordering phrases in Britain ...it wouldnt be a surprise given ( eg ) how prevalent " guys " is in Britain and many other Americanisms ....provoking the old fashioned in Britain to auto - ridicule themselves backlash eg on spelling ....Two last things, one, " May i have ...." sounds over fussy today and two, many people would just say " Two cokes, please " :):)
I'm autistic and somewhat literally minded, I'd have gone and checked if was open, and left it as is.
I'm autistic, too, and same. When they looked at me like I was nuts for needing clarification, I would have corrected the grammar of their first question, showing how (in literal terms) checking if the window was open and closing the window are two *completely different* things.
One aspect I think you may have overlooked is the question of politeness. The British indirectness is often a way of sparing someone's feelings. "It's mostly OK, but there are some improvements needed" is more gentle than "This is an unacceptably low standard piece of work. Please start again."
Also keeping the low key remarks for the every day keeps the severe comments in reserve. If you've already said "This is absolutely great" for something that was just about acceptable, where do you go to for a truly outstanding accomplishment?
"super excited"? Although, I work with Americans and they always seem to introduce themselves as being "super excited" before you even get started. Surely it can only go down from there.
@@rebel_is_hereAwesome!
Some of the context is to navigate how reasonable it is to ask something. It allows a little flexibility. If you give people an order, that may not always be appropriate. A slightly indirect style lets context fill in the gaps and is forgiving if people have slightly different assessments of the situation. To fill in all those permutations with direct communication would take a lot more words.
As a brit I would usually interpret "quite good" to mean "greatly exceeded my expectations". Eg: "the film was actually quite good" = I wasn't expecting much but I really enjoyed it. "This meal is really quite good" = this may actually be the best thing I have ever eaten.
You`ve altered your point now by including extra words , actually, really ?
In Yorkshire, " That'll do ". ( IE "That will do " ) ....ie " That will suffice " - actually means , " Yes! That's very good ! " .
In Lancashire, " Be reet" ( ie "That will be fine" / " That's okay " ) means
" It's tolerable "
There is a famous incident during the Korean War - Battle of the Imjin River. After two days' fighting, an American, Major General Robert H. Soule, asked the British brigadier, Thomas Brodie: "How are the Glosters doing?" (The Gloucestershire Regiment), The brigadier, with English understatement, replied: "A bit sticky, things are pretty sticky down there." To American ears, this did not sound desperate, he understood this to mean ‘We’re having a bit of rough and tumble but we’re holding the line’. Oh good, the general decided, no need to reinforce or withdraw them, not yet anyway.”
But Brodie meant they were in serious trouble. “His men were outnumbered eight to one, stranded on every side by human waves of…attackers…. After the battle more than 500 British soldiers had been captured ( and spent the rest of the war in a North Korean POW camp) , 59 were killed or missing. Only 39 escaped back to UN lines.
The Gloucesters still held line, while the yanks withdrew. I know this because a Korean village till this day celebrate and honour the British Gloucesters as they call them for saving them. An elderly Korean gentleman told the story.
That is a prime example where "low context" would have been better. A battlefield is not the place for sublte hints.
I came looking for this one as it is possibly the best example. Both sides were right by their lights, but the result was a serious misunderstanding.
This is a bad anecdote In matters of life and death, in the battlefield, or any action, even in a factory or construction site, a figure of speech is never used by anyone.
@@thiloreichelt4199, the point is it’s not a subtle hint at all to a Brit - it’s immediately evident that things are very bad and immediate assistance is required.
I’m British, but I’ve travelled a lot and I’m rather literal-minded, so I don’t know where I’d place on your spectrum! However, if I’d been in your position and asked to check on the window, I’d have found the request rather unclear, so I’d have asked before going up the first time, “Would you like it open or closed?”. It’s unlikely that anyone would send me up just to report on the window status, without doing anything about it if it was wrong.
Obviosly you don't want to leave it open if you're going out though
@@jenanization She said there were various people in the office who were not going out, so no, I don’t think it was obvious.
Really insightful and fascinating video - I'd often wondered whether the more literal way of speaking in the States was to do with the pioneering spirit or whether it was more about integrating many cultures.
BTW I'm a Brit but I must confess that I too would have checked to make sure that the window was open!! However if they'd said 'can you check if the upstairs window has been left open' then I'd have closed it.
"Well, that's a different way of looking at it" means "you're wrong, you fool, wise up or ship out"
The thing is though it could mean that but it could also just mean it's face meaning. It depends on the context, tone, expression etc.
“With respect…” Some of my favourite insults start with those two words.
See also: “I’m not being funny but…” which is English for “It most definitely isn’t funny. This annoys me greatly”
So widespread is it’s use, that often the sentence doesn’t even need completing, you both know what’s coming. Could be anything from ‘Wow did he actually look in a mirror before he left home. Look at the state of that’ to ‘How f**king long is this queue?’ And a million other, unsaid but obvious things in between.
Your channel is great, sad that you get nothing for reaction videos of your videos, but that’s how I found you.
Oh well, I’m here now. Keep doing what you’re doing.
A Brit 🇬🇧
@@tdurb0 I’m not being funny, but….= I’m about to be funny with you. ( not funny haha, funny, funny.)
@@lauraharwood6581 NW England, this phrase translates to, "I'm definitely going to slag this person off" 😂
the more you study communication the more you are amazed that humans can communicate at all
Why do you think we have so many wars?!
@@hegedusuk A lot less to do with communication and more one group of people having something that another group of people think they want
@@hegedusuk greed
I've never heard someone saying "I'm just going out for some food (or whatever) , does anybody want anything?" and not mean it. If they're going to the effort of asking, they asking if you want them to get something for you. And yes, I'm British, and have worked in many parts of the country, though I haven't done so for the past 20+ years.
I always mean it and I assume that my colleagues do, too.
If more items are asked for than one person can easily carry, one of us will offer to help.
Same with offering to make cups of tea/coffee.
@@miaschu8175 Yup. The last time I was working in the UK, if someone was making coffee and/or tea, they made it for EVERYONE.
Even workers who drank neither would do so. It's called being part of a team.
Thanks for those observations Kalyn. That explains a lot regarding the frustration I sometimes feel when dealing with Americans. I think the secret to good communication is to know when to be subtle and when to be direct. It very much depends on context.
One fallout from having to be always direct is the inability to grasp irony, something the Americans and Germans are often accused of. I enjoy your observations and comments. Keep it up.
The difficulty in grasping irony becomes much less problematic once you ironise in German.
Many years ago, I worked for a British software company. If a customer called with a problem caused by a software fault, we would say something like.
"That's a bug. Here is a workaround."
The company did some sort of merger with a US one and we started to get messages from the top saying NEVER to say bug and giving someone a workaround was insulting!
I suspect this was because the US partner was very fixated on lawyers and high self esteem.
Someone had to invent the phrase "undocumented feature" to allow us to explain things and it needed odd phrasing to explain a workaround. Our default words were much more direct than the US ones.
That's strange. I live in California & "bug" & "workaround" are commonly used & not problematic at all. (Other than maybe someone being unhappy that they have to use a workaround, instead of getting the problem fixed.)
@miriamrobarts I imagine it depends on when he worked there, they type of customers they had, personal users or businesses, and similar to the first one, how computer savvy someone was.
@@miriamrobarts I believe it was to do with lawyers - a famous feature of your society!
"bug" means a fault that we have not instantly fixed.
Banning "workaround" is less clear to me but we suspected it was something to do with liability.
@@hesky10 Thgis would have been about 30 years ago.. It made professional level accounting software - for accountants, payrolls, warehouses etc.
They never had a problem with those words until they opened sales in the USA. I suspect it had something to your central national profession of lawyers.
Have been in software support for 7 years across 2 companies, neither liked to use bug for customer facing purposes because it implied the product was faulty
'British' language is full of short cuts & inferred meaning. I will say "are you okay?" not necessarily expectating a full run-down on why you're not! In fact, it's really a greeting, more than anything.
I think a lot is based on not wanting to offend, seem too direct, or too intrusive. But, you are concerned enough to ask, or want to be friendly.
A classic misunderstanding between the US and the UK came in the Korean War, when a British force was attacked by the Chinese. The Brits reported to the US “things are a bit sticky”. The Americans thought this meant things were tough but ok whereas the Brits meant it was going to hell and needed help asap.
Important to know that this is not understatement. Anyone steeped in privately-schooled British culture knows that 'a bit sticky' means 'we are preparing to die'. It was direct communication of impending catastrophe which was sadly misunderstood.
Oh dear, I knew straight away that they wanted you to close the window if it was open... I also asked my husband and he thought the same as me :)
If only I had had you there on the day to help translate for me!! ;) Thanks for watching!
I'm an Aussie and I knew what to do too 😅
@@GirlGoneLondonofficialIf it is any consolation, I don't think I would have assumed they wanted the window closed. Maybe they wanted to check that it had been left open for ventilation. Just as plausible.
Oh GGL, that was so spot on. I (Brit) working with visiting Americans saw this loads. Sometimes it takes so much disentangling.
I'll try to keep this genuine example short. I was asked to unpack this misunderstanding:
American asks a Brit driver "can we turn through that gate there?" Meaning is it permitted?
Brit answer "well it's open isn't it?"
American hears "are you so dumb you can't see that it's physically possible"
Brit means " it's physically possible (and we're not going to let trivial little details like rules cramp our style now are we).
I'd never heard this high/low context thing explained before but it is so true.
English has the verbs "can" and "may" for different meanings. Folding both into the one verb "can" makes it needlessly difficult to interpret the intended meaning.
An accompanying wink would seal the deal:)
Yes, I just discovered you over Thanksgiving.. and cannot get enough... here I am up to 3 months ago.... I LOVE LOVE LOVE this one. Oh my... thanks for the snow day so I can keep filling spare time with the videos. I really REALLY like this video.
In Florida I went to hire a jet ski at the beach. I approached the dude hiring them out with a ”hi, how are you?” We went into friendly small talk for bit and then something happened which made me realise Americans don’t have the same sense of humour:
Him: “It’s been a full on day, man - glad to be seeing the end of it”.
Me: “Really, what time did you start?”
Him: “I opened up 10 hours ago”
Me: “Oh, so you’re a part-timer then?” 😉
At this point a British dude would laugh…he got offended and angry.
I was in a bakery in Brooklyn that had an amazing array of cakes and pastries. “Not much choice is there” I said. The assistant looked shocked.
@@darkmatter6714 yes, I'm an American who's lived on this side of the pond for a very long time, and I sometimes forget how much I've adjusted to slight differences in meaning of everyday words like how sorry is used. I'll try getting past someone in a crowded room by saying sorry, and receive a very earnest reply of 'oh that's OK!' 🙄 Which brings out my smart Alec impulse to say 'is it? Whew! What a relief! Which in America I usually firmly suppress.
Hmm your sense of humour would put lots of people's back up. (Brit)
I feel like that's a joke many Americans would make as well, so it could have been more of misunderstanding in the difference in delivery & tone than the wording, in this case. (And the guy was really tired, so being grumpy already, he took it the wrong way.)
@@BethanyLowe8773 Well, not me as that's my kind of a joke.
The American comedian Reginald D Hunter tells a story of going to a party in the UK, having a pleasant chat to someone and then waking up 3 days later and realising that guy really hated him.
Everyone hates Reginald D Hunter, if they've got any sense. Good work that guy
I think an increasing number of British people feel that that sort of thing isn't really acceptable. You shouldn't give someone the wrong impression just because you find it amusing to string them along, which is what was actually going on when people behaved in that way.
@@BethanyLowe8773I like him a lot
I admit even as a Brit I struggled with what I now know to be Subjunctive Commands.
Example: "If you could do X ... "
It actually means: "Do X" - but is wrapped up in a pseudo-polite hypothetical. Also known as B.S.
That is what drove my Dad crazy about my German mother. They loved one another dearly, but he took those subjunctives as "beating about the bush".
I recently came off my motorbike on a parade lap at a public event. Some of the guys came over to get the bike off me (it weighs over 260kg) upon which I said "That stings a bit." I'd just broken my collar bone.
In around 1985 I was giving one-to-one advanced-level English language instruction to a German executive at a language school in Frankfurt. I recall at one point saying, "That's not quite right." At this, his eyes lit up and he retorted, "Ah, the famous English understatement. What you mean is it was totally wrong." And he was right.
This is another example of what happens in London and the Southeast compared with the rest of the country. You will find that outside London, many people do communicate more directly. Famously, Yorkshire people have a particular reputation for being direct.
Calling a spade a spade.
I found the same as a Scottish working class person in a London workplace with mainly middle class English people. It frustrated me sometimes that people didn't say what they meant.
Who the **** told you that?
As a Yorkshire woman, I was going to say this. We are known as blunt. If someone had asked me to check a window was open, and it was, I would have assumed that as it was the end of the working day, it would need to be shut and shut it. But this video explains why Americans are always shocked about things which Britons would be mildly surprised about.
@@russellbradley454 nah I would call a spade a shuvle.
In my office a supervisor will say, "Can you check if the windows are open in the training room?" and it's very clearly understood that if they are open, I'm to close them.
At the end of the day, that is. At the start of the day it means, "We've got some people coming and we need to get some fresh air in the training room if the windows haven't been opened."
I can understand why this might be confusing. 😕
Context is everything
I'd say there's a bit of a high context/low context divide between the North & South within England, as well. You might feel more at home in Yorkshire, Kalyn, where 'a spade's a spade' is seen as the way to be.
The Yorkshire saying "I say what I like and I like what I say" is very true.
I think you meant, call a spade a shovel.🤣
@@christophergrimmette9546 Clearly, you don't know the difference... Spades cut, shovels move.
As a born and bred English woman this made me chuckle. I didnt realise until you said how the things we say arent necessarily what we mean. It just come automatically to us.
Were the Apollo 13 astronauts Brits? "Houston we had a problem"
Houston we've had one or two niggles
Danger Deadpan
“What would those be?” …
“Well, er… breathing has become a little bit tricky, one way or another…”