I think I am aware of having been both versions of the chameleon in the past, as I'm sure all INFJs have depending on circumstances. The key difference seems to be in the base motivating factor - if my main motivation is to fit in (and I don't really care for the "cause" in question, no matter how well I'm fooling myself in the process, ie identifying with it at the time 😂), it feels off even when I'm successful at it. If my own assimilation, how I fit into the situation feels unimportant at the time, then I'm still adapting to the environment, but deep down I am aware that I am just using a tool, and not being inauthentic and ultimately insincere.
The first time being a chameleon really hit me was when I had two different acquaintances from two different walks of life meet. I didn’t know how to be. One knew me as one “person” the other knew me as a different “person”. It was very awkward.
From my experience, the chameleon-like factor is more obvious with ENFJs, especially if they have a lot of different friend groups. I have seen changing in appearance, clothing, things talked about, language usage, interests, depending on the group being interacted with. One ENFJ I know from online mentioned the use of appearance as a means of “social capital”, perhaps helping to create more intimate connections with those in the group? I suppose with Se/Ni (+ Fe) there are a lot of signs/symbols that can be perceived and used to indicate belonging.
Thanks for answering the isfj question. At the beginning of this video, I wondered with their Fe function, if they struggled with feeling like a chameleon.
My wife pointed that out to me before i knew it myself. If it wasn't for your content of these videos, I would have never known why or how I was being chameleon.
Maybe you could expand on this video and cover your take on projective identification and how to cope with that. I find myself struggling to not identify with what my introjective Fe picks up. Oftentimes I need quite a bit of introspection to figure out how my reactions came together and where my true self is on all of this. It helps me to unpack my trauma and see what dangers and motivations drive me. At the same time I can feel quite a bit of confusion and guilt, when I notice that I may have acted automatically and not aligned with my true self. I still learn to resolve the tension that builds up in the face of all that.
I think I am aware of having been both versions of the chameleon in the past, as I'm sure all INFJs have depending on circumstances.
The key difference seems to be in the base motivating factor - if my main motivation is to fit in (and I don't really care for the "cause" in question, no matter how well I'm fooling myself in the process, ie identifying with it at the time 😂), it feels off even when I'm successful at it.
If my own assimilation, how I fit into the situation feels unimportant at the time, then I'm still adapting to the environment, but deep down I am aware that I am just using a tool, and not being inauthentic and ultimately insincere.
The first time being a chameleon really hit me was when I had two different acquaintances from two different walks of life meet.
I didn’t know how to be. One knew me as one “person” the other knew me as a different “person”. It was very awkward.
That’s why it’s good to stay as close to authentic as possible to have as a default mode. Then you could confuse both of them equally 🤪
From my experience, the chameleon-like factor is more obvious with ENFJs, especially if they have a lot of different friend groups. I have seen changing in appearance, clothing, things talked about, language usage, interests, depending on the group being interacted with. One ENFJ I know from online mentioned the use of appearance as a means of “social capital”, perhaps helping to create more intimate connections with those in the group? I suppose with Se/Ni (+ Fe) there are a lot of signs/symbols that can be perceived and used to indicate belonging.
Thanks for answering the isfj question. At the beginning of this video, I wondered with their Fe function, if they struggled with feeling like a chameleon.
I concur, and furthermore, was myself called a shapeshifter by someone very intuitive, only just last week.
Interesting. I've been called that too though in different words.
My wife pointed that out to me before i knew it myself. If it wasn't for your content of these videos, I would have never known why or how I was being chameleon.
Maybe you could expand on this video and cover your take on projective identification and how to cope with that. I find myself struggling to not identify with what my introjective Fe picks up. Oftentimes I need quite a bit of introspection to figure out how my reactions came together and where my true self is on all of this. It helps me to unpack my trauma and see what dangers and motivations drive me. At the same time I can feel quite a bit of confusion and guilt, when I notice that I may have acted automatically and not aligned with my true self. I still learn to resolve the tension that builds up in the face of all that.