As an adult who has ADHD and used to have meltdowns as a kid, whenever my mom did what you are suggesting, (say my name in a calm voice and told me, "you need to calm down"), it would make me EVEN ANGRIER... Not because she wasn't giving me what I wanted... She was "telling me what to do", without an explanation as to "why". The poor child doesn't understand WHY, and THEY don't need to calm down, YOU need to CALM THEM DOWN! I don't care if it's hard for you, learn how to do it because the kid can't figure it out on their own!!! We just assume they are too young and stupid to understand anything so we just tell them to shut up. Maybe adults who don't actually have the disorder should talk to more adults that DO, and ask them what they need in that situation.
I have a 12 year old daughter with ODD and bipolar disorder, so I'm all too familiar with tantrums. I'm working with multisystemic therapy and medication for her course of treatment. I see some improvements in her behavior but tantrums still arise,especially as I set up rules and behavior requirements and follow through with consequences. I've had property destroyed and I've been bitten, slapped, scratched and most recently, my head busted open with a broom stick. Of course, friends and family suggest that I beat my child senseless to put fear into her but they fail to understand 'senseless' is the problem and that you can't overcome evil with evil. However, I do fear for the safety of the others in our household, so if the tantrums persist, I may opt for her removal from our home for a while...if all else fails. Your strategies are greatly appreciated!
Thank you for this great video I have watched about 10 of them this morning and you are the only one that knows what the hell is going on. I thank you for a great video I subscribed and I will be back again to watch more of your videos. Thank you and keep up the good work.
You can prevent meltdowns with children on the autism spectrum, but it requires preparation and keen monitoring for triggers and overstimulation. I have a ten year old who is on the spectrum, and he no longer has meltdowns because we have taught him how to advocate for himself to deal with triggers and resolve issues before they overwhelm him. This was a boy who used to break furniture, bite, head butt and self injure before we hired a behaviorist (qualified BCBA) to help us.
a meltdown and a tantrum are very different things - or should I say the meaning of those two words are very different. A meltdown is something that cannot be helped, when it happens it is all consuming a tantrum is something that can be managed , eventually with interaction ( carefully supported) but a meltdown is something where a person loses all knowledge of surrounding and goes deeply into a complete shut down situation ... i love your video and am grateful for you to post it, truly i am. I am pointing out the difference in the meaning of the words as this can cause confusement for those new to this area of life. kindest regards
everything you have said is my child. she is 4. i have expected this is 4 year old behavior. though my other child didn't experience this. our bedtime is a very chaotic time in our house. very stressful. which usually leads to my husband and i disagreeing. help!!!
Most of these kids are having a medical emergency due to a lack of a vitamin or mineral or a toxicity and telling people not to take their kid to the hospital when they're having a medical emergency is dangerous.
My near 4 year old does not have autism (no obvious signs) yet has meltdowns pretty frequently throughout the week... I did find she was more of a sensitive child than most, strong willed and high spirited. The melt downs are hard to deal with because they 'seem' to come out of nowhere... having a good time with her big sister(17 years old) laughing and so forth then wants to join her older sister while she is on the toilet... older sister wants to be left alone then meltdown happens. She bangs her head on the door (not so long ago got a bruise from doing so) and tries to knock the door down and going hysterical. So I hold her on the bed in a hug form until she calms down since she will highly likely not if left to run around and refuses to listen to a word.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
As an adult who has ADHD and used to have meltdowns as a kid, whenever my mom did what you are suggesting, (say my name in a calm voice and told me, "you need to calm down"), it would make me EVEN ANGRIER... Not because she wasn't giving me what I wanted... She was "telling me what to do", without an explanation as to "why". The poor child doesn't understand WHY, and THEY don't need to calm down, YOU need to CALM THEM DOWN! I don't care if it's hard for you, learn how to do it because the kid can't figure it out on their own!!! We just assume they are too young and stupid to understand anything so we just tell them to shut up. Maybe adults who don't actually have the disorder should talk to more adults that DO, and ask them what they need in that situation.
I have a 12 year old daughter with ODD and bipolar disorder, so I'm all too familiar with tantrums. I'm working with multisystemic therapy and medication for her course of treatment. I see some improvements in her behavior but tantrums still arise,especially as I set up rules and behavior requirements and follow through with consequences. I've had property destroyed and I've been bitten, slapped, scratched and most recently, my head busted open with a broom stick. Of course, friends and family suggest that I beat my child senseless to put fear into her but they fail to understand 'senseless' is the problem and that you can't overcome evil with evil. However, I do fear for the safety of the others in our household, so if the tantrums persist, I may opt for her removal from our home for a while...if all else fails. Your strategies are greatly appreciated!
Thank you, Barbara. This is very helpful! I appreciate you freely sharing your expertise.
Thank you for this great video I have watched about 10 of them this morning and you are the only one that knows what the hell is going on. I thank you for a great video I subscribed and I will be back again to watch more of your videos. Thank you and keep up the good work.
You can prevent meltdowns with children on the autism spectrum, but it requires preparation and keen monitoring for triggers and overstimulation. I have a ten year old who is on the spectrum, and he no longer has meltdowns because we have taught him how to advocate for himself to deal with triggers and resolve issues before they overwhelm him. This was a boy who used to break furniture, bite, head butt and self injure before we hired a behaviorist (qualified BCBA) to help us.
If only that could work in my house and my parents could teach me that
I would LOVE to hear your strategies on this. Would probably be 10x more helpful than this video.
a meltdown and a tantrum are very different things - or should I say the meaning of those two words are very different. A meltdown is something that cannot be helped, when it happens it is all consuming a tantrum is something that can be managed , eventually with interaction ( carefully supported) but a meltdown is something where a person loses all knowledge of surrounding and goes deeply into a complete shut down situation ... i love your video and am grateful for you to post it, truly i am. I am pointing out the difference in the meaning of the words as this can cause confusement for those new to this area of life. kindest regards
Thanks for the video. Its awesome
Thanks for watching!
everything you have said is my child. she is 4. i have expected this is 4 year old behavior. though my other child didn't experience this. our bedtime is a very chaotic time in our house. very stressful. which usually leads to my husband and i disagreeing. help!!!
Most of these kids are having a medical emergency due to a lack of a vitamin or mineral or a toxicity and telling people not to take their kid to the hospital when they're having a medical emergency is dangerous.
My near 4 year old does not have autism (no obvious signs) yet has meltdowns pretty frequently throughout the week... I did find she was more of a sensitive child than most, strong willed and high spirited. The melt downs are hard to deal with because they 'seem' to come out of nowhere... having a good time with her big sister(17 years old) laughing and so forth then wants to join her older sister while she is on the toilet... older sister wants to be left alone then meltdown happens. She bangs her head on the door (not so long ago got a bruise from doing so) and tries to knock the door down and going hysterical. So I hold her on the bed in a hug form until she calms down since she will highly likely not if left to run around and refuses to listen to a word.
I must say these meltdowns are much more likely while hungry or/and tired/exhausted or overheated from a hot day.